This takes place between chapters 45 and 46
"Thanks again Max," one of the castle maids, smiled while Celestia's pet human held a vase of flowers high so she could clean the hall table. Ok, so pet was not the word the Sun Princess used, but that was what he jokingly called himself and most of the palace staff were happy to oblige.
"Not a prob, Dusty…" Max smiled, replacing the flowers once the little sandy brown earth mare with the feather duster cutie mark had finished. "Grandpa always said that one should always be ready to lend a pretty girl a hand."
"So you think I'm pretty," she asked, batting her large green eyes seductively.
"I'll plead the fifth on that and just say that you look cute in your uniform."
"Well, thanks…" she giggled while giving her rump a bit of a shake. "It's Prench…"
"I bet it is," he chuckled before turning away and heading down the hall before she could ask for anything else. It wasn't that he didn't want to help out with her work, it was that Celestia had let slip about his magic bathing skills and now every filly and mare in the palace was begging to have a go.
Sad thing was that Celestia was actually contemplating an answer… god he hoped it was no!
Max had just rounded a corner, minding his own business when a male voice called out, "Royal Consort!" You know, he didn't mind Sunbutt giving him the title, but dammit, why did she have to make it a publicly known title? "Royal Consort Max Rex…" the human gave out a tired sigh and tried to ignore the voice, walking a bit faster.
"AH-TENNN-HUT!"
Max, and several of the guards stationed along the hall all snapped to attention, he did it out of reflex really… damn military brain washing. "Now that I have your undivided, Master Sergeant," a white unicorn male with blue mane barked as he trotted up and stood before the human. "I would like to talk to you about…"
"Oh it's you," Max relaxed. "How are thing going Shiny?"
"Did I say At-Ease," he snapped, his gaze boring up at the human. "Now then Royal Consort, I need to talk to you about your little trip to Ponyville."
"Let's get one thing straight, Prince Shining Armor, I'm not one of your guards, nor am I in the service anymore…" the human had to take a deep breath to calm the nerve that Shiny was now standing on. "On top of that, I've made it perfectly clear that while I don't mind the title Celestia saddled me with, I won't be ruled by it… if you wish to talk, my name is Max or T-Rex."
Both stood their ground, glaring at one another, until finally one of the nearby guards coughed.
"Fine," the new prince grunted. "Max, I have a few questions about the trip you took to Ponyville last week."
"Cool, what do you want to know," Max again relaxed and dropped the defensive tone in his voice.
"I want to know what happened between you and Twilight Sparkle," the unicorn demanded.
"Why would you want to know that," he blinked in mild confusion. "Here I thought you would have been upset that I took Celestia out to an unsecured town without guard protection…"
"We will get to that, but first, I want to know about Twilight!"
"Ummm, okay," the ex-Master Sergeant shrugged, not sure about the odd signals Shiny was giving off. "To start with, she's a really nice filly, but she's a complete teacher's pet. She's outgoing with hidden OCDs… Oh, and she's a bit of a moaner in bed."
"The reason I ask," Shining Armor hissed though clinched teeth. "Is that she is my little sister!"
"Oooohh fuck me…" Max suddenly felt like a harp seal looking down the wrong end of a club.
"Your Majesty, Your Majesty!"
Looking up from the paperwork splayed across her desk, the Sun Princess fond Dusty, one of the palace maids rushing into her office. "Hello Dusty," she gave a smile. "You seem to be distressed…"
"SirShiningArmorjusthadMaxtakenintocustodyandtakenaway!"
Celestia tilted her head in confusion, the maid panicked having blurted the whole sentience in one shot. "My dear, I can not understand a word you said," she said in her motherly tone. "please, calm down and try again."
Taking several deep breaths the maid closed her eyes and repeated "Sir Shining Armor just had Max taken into custody and taken away…"
"Oh, well this can't be good," the princess flinched. "I don't suppose you know why?"
"It had something to do with Miss Sparkle and being a moaner in bed…"
"Oh for buck sakes," Celestia gave out a tired sigh. "Was there anything else?"
"Max thought I looked cute in my uniform."
"Ok, that's not…" shaking her head, Celestia rose and trotted past Dusty to the door. "Mr. Thunder," she glanced toward the pegasi guard standing just outside the door.
"Yes ma'am," he snapped to attention.
"If you had a beloved little sister, and found out she was seeing a strange stallion," the princess asked, "Where would you take him to intimidate the Tartarus out of him?"
"Unbridled, Ma'am."
"At this hour," Dusty couldn't help but ask. "I didn't think that place opened until after 6pm."
"It's only open to the public between 6pm and 2am," the guard clarified. "But the bar is open 24-7 to off duty guards… and it has sound proof privet rooms"
"Ouch, Perfect place to intimidate somepony…" Dusty blanched.
"Right… Blue Thunder, gather a few guards and meat me at the palace gates," she stated before motioning to the maid. "Come along Dusty, I need you assistance."
"Yes My Princess," both announced, the guard galloping off down the hall while Dusty followed Celestia the other direction. "Pardon me your highness, but where are we going," she asked once she realized they were not heading towards the front doors of the castle.
"We are going to see the uniform supply-pony," she smiled impishly. "I want to see if she has a Prench maid's outfit in my size."
"Oh my," Dusty giggled.
The two bouncers that ambled about outside Unbridled froze in their hooves when Celestia, accompanied by 6 royal guards and a maid, marched up and glared down at them. "Is Shining Armor present at this establishment," she demanded, not at all looking happy…
"Y…yes ma'am," one of the bouncers whimpered as both bowed low.
"Did he have a tall hairless monkey with him?"
"Yes your highness," the other blurted out.
"Blue Thunder," she barked as she pushed her way into the establishment. "Be on alert, I want my Consort found and fast…"
"Ummm, pardon me," Dusty waved a hoof in the air, waiting until her princess nodded in her direction. "Could somepony tell me why I'm here?"
"er… I'm very sorry my dear," Celestia gave a weak smile, though the truth was that she had forgotten that Dusty was still with their little group. "You may return to the palace..."
As Dusty rushed off, Celestia turned and used her magic to fling open the front doors. Even though the place wouldn't be open to the public for another 4 hours, it was open round the clock to any and had a good assortment off duty guards within, so the lights were still turned down low and the music was thumping away as they made their way into the main room that was Unbridled. A horseshoe shaped bar sat in the middle of the floor while dance stages occupied each of the four corners of room… however only two were in use.
To the right, a young green mare danced around a pole, while on the left stage a beefy reddish stud shook his rear for all to see.
"Everypony, spared out and find Shining Armor and M…"
"Found them," Broadsword interrupted the Sun Princess as he pointed towards the bar.
Sure enough, Shining Armor sat atop a stool, belled up to the dark wooden bar. While Max stood on the other side and looked to be conversing with the bartender. "Max," Celestia called as she rushed over. "Are you ok?"
"Osh, I'z in twuble (hic) nhow…" Shining slurred before falling off his stool while trying to discreetly slip away.
"I'm doing fine," Max chuckled as he leaned over the bar to gaze at the unicorn now passed out on the floor. "Well, that went quicker than expected…"
"May I ask," she peered down at the drooling stallion. "Why is the head of my royal guard and husband to my niece doing on the floor?"
"Welllll, to be honest," the human smiled. "He brought me here to do who knows what, but I talked him into having a drink first, you know, to calm my nerves…"
"And," Celestia asked.
"I asked Absinthe here for a drink he had never heard of," he nodded to the bartender who nodded and waved back. "And being the nice stallion he is, he lets me make said drink and share it with Shiny…"
"And…" she pressed.
"Since I don't like to drink alcohol, I made us both a lemonade icey," there was a sheepish grin covering his face as he poked at the drink Shiny had been sipping. "However… I slipped him a mickey when he wasn't looking."
"So I take it that this is what you call a mickey," she sniffed at the half filled glass. "What is in it?"
"Slipping someone a Mickey, is code for spiking their drink with hard alcohol," he elaborated.
"Oh," she blanched. "Then what is this drink called?"
"Back home it's called a margarita," he said as he dipped the rim of a new glass into some crushed salt, than, as she watched he added lemonade/icey/slush before adding a shot or three of potato vodka and placing it before her. "But seeing as how the drink didn't exist on Equestria before two hours ago, I've renamed it a Celestia Sunrise."
Hesitantly the princess eyed the frosted drink before tentatively taking a sip. "Hmmm, that's not bad… but you do know that salt is a drug to my little ponies?"
"Yeah, Absinthe here explained that one to me while I was making the drinks."
"So…" she turned her attention back toward the unicorn on the floor. "How many did you give him before …this…?"
"He still hasn't finished his first," Max chuckled as he dumped Shinny's half full glass in the sink behind the bar."
