Owl here, since I took over and all that. I just want you to know that a new guest star has joined us for this episode of our movie! That's about it... Yeah... MEET Bat! (And yes, he actually is helping write this, unlike all those doctors, cops, portals, etc.)

[I hate those cops. They have tasers... ANYWAY. ONTO DA STORY.]


Me: Owl, I'm BOOORED.

Owl: Then read a book or something.

Me: Wahtz a book?

Owl: It is like a refrigerator, except more knowledgeable.

Me: NOO. BIG WORDS. *shrinks*

Bat: Uh... I DUNNO.

Me: *falls off couch, faceplanting on the floor*

Owl: *slaps with book*

Me: *takes book and looks at it* Wut ish dis?

Bat: It's a Justin Beiber magazine.

Me: *screams head off and shoves book in shredder* NOOO! *kicks shredder and incinerates the shreds for good measure* MY HANDZ ARE CONTAMINATED! *dives into kiddy pool* Is this.. Chocolate pudding?

Owl: Nope. *walks away*

Me: DEN WAT ISH IT?!

Bat: *shrugs*

Me: -_- You don't know a lot of things, do you?

Bat: I'M A BAT! *flits around*

Owl: WRONG. You're BatGIRL.

Me: Ooh, capsiez.

Bat: *clicks caps lock* wHAT'S THIS BUTTON DO?!

Me: Stuff. Amazing shtuffs.

Bat: yAY ME! i STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT IT DOES THOUGH!

Owl: Lookie here... *picks up Skistar*

Me: Where'd he come from...? *gurgles*

[Amazing realization BY ME! It's not really chocolate pudding.]

Me: *screams 'my mouth is contaminated' and runs into the lake*

Bat: Thats not water.

Me: HOW YOU KNOWZ?!

Bat: *shrugs* Maaaaybe the fact that it's bright yellow...

Me: *looks down at water in horror*

Owl: MUSTARD!

Me: YAY KETCHUP! *swims around*

Owl: *Barfs*

Me: *drowns*

Bat: *resurrects me*

Me: LEIK A BAWS! *rises like a phoenix*

Owl: *EPIC POKES ME*

Me: *stops floating and slowly sinks back into 'lake'*


[Guess what? GUESS WHAT?! . . . Nope, sorry, I've got nothing. Continue.]

Me: LET'S GO SLEDDING!

Owl: Wonderful idea! *kicks me over and uses me as a sled*

Me: BUT DERES NO SNOW!

Bat: Precisely.

Owl: WHICH IS WHY I WILL... MAKE... SNOOOOOW!

Me: You haz breathing problems. *rolls around in mud*

Owl: *Tazers*

Me: *goes spastic in the mud, flinging it everywhere. Including Owl's face.*

Owl: NO MOVEMENTS! *Pepper sprays*

Me: MAAAAAAAAI EYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES! *squirms*

Bat: *runs into power line*

Owl: *gets chainsaw and cuts down power line*

Me: But now we have no power...

Bat: *is crushed* *dissipates into mud*

Me: This mud feels weird... *pokes*

Bat: *flys out screaming bloody murder and attacking my face*

Me: *slams head into mud to save self* OH MY HOLY FAX MACHINE WHAT'S WHAT?! *Is attacked by facesucker* Squish. Squish. Ssssssshhhhquiiiiish.

Random bird: SQUAWK. *flies away*

Bat: *Tazers facesucker*

Me: *stands up before suddenly loosing consciousness and faceplanting in the mud. Again. Yes, moar mud. No complaining.*

[Ostrich walks by]

Owl: Where the heck did that come from? *picks up rock and throws it at me because she can*

Me: *twitches*

Bat: NOT AN OSTRICH! *hides and starts hyperventilating*

Owl: *kicks ostrich*

Ostrich: HONK.

Me: That's a goose... *rolls around in mud like a pig*

Bat: *starts having a seizure*

Owl: Hm, you're right. *pulls off costume, revealing a large purple goose*

Me: SINCE WHEN ARE GEESE PURPLE?! Dat's just not right, gurl.

Owl: *shrugs*

Bat: *has heart attack*

Me: Oh, uh, hey Bat. You good man? *pokes*

Owl: LET'Z GO TO DA VIDEO GAME PLACE!


[Later, at some random gaming place...]

Bat: I wanna play in the arcade.

Me: NO. NOOOO GAMING FOR YOU. *epic pokes*

Owl: *trots over to a Pac-Man game and starts playing*

Bat: *faceplants on floor*

Me: *shrugs and walks over to video game named Nort*

Bat:*Starts to cry*

Me and Owl: SHUDDUP WE'RE FOCUSING!

Bat: *slithers across floor*

Me: *throws tomatoe at Bat*

Bat: Ow. *pokes toes that had fallen on his head*

Owl: HIGH SCORE!

Me: *sticks tongue out of mouth to focus harder*

Bat: *Drives into wall*

Owl: How did... *phases through wall*

Me: *still playing Nort* *game crashes* NOOOOO! *kicks it*

Owl: *peeks head out of wall* Whut?

[Lightning comes out of the Nort game]

Me: WHAT TH- *electrocuted by lightning and is sucked into game*

Owl: WHEEEE *calmly floats by on lightning cloud*

Bat: Yaaaaaay... *chills on Owl's cloud*


[After getting zapped and seriously mad that Owl and Bat just CALMLY RODE IN, ON A FREAKING CLOUD, we find ourselves in the land of Tron. Tron because I want it to be backwards. REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY!]

Bat: Uh... Where are we? *looks around endless glowing plains*

Me: *massive lightning surge comes out of body* AWHRLKFNQA WEKFNBSJVFB WSEKHgb sikngfbl sakh8039y2nfwkunvw8wbvou!

Bat: Seriously?

Owl: *slaps* SHUDDUP. SILENCE, FOOL. *kicks in face*

Bat: Ow.

Me: *points to lightcycles in distance* Whuz dat?

Owl: *eats popsicle*

Me: STOP WITH YOUR POPSICLES! *snatches and eats it*

Owl: *gasps* NO. IMBECILE.

[The lightcycles finally reach us]

Me: Oh, hey guyz.

Owl: *pulls out avocadoes* YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME! TAKE HIM INSTEAD! *shoves Bat in front of her*

Bat: O.O Squeak?

Me, Owl, and Bat: *taken*


[Somewhere in this randomly computerized place full of people that are magically like glass]

Announcer: Are all our players ready?

Bat: No...

Me: Whut?

Owl: *spaz* HARBLEDGUNK.

Announcer: Uh... Oook then...? *clears throat* ANYWAY. LET THE GAMES BEGIN!

Me: Whut game...? *has random glowy spinny disk thingy thrown at head*

Announcer: Disk Wars.

Me: I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT IS!

Owl: *expertly tosses disk at other guy and wins instantly*

Bat: *Fumbles with disk* Hyaaa! *holds out empty hand* Oh... Shhhhh-

GPS: Beep.

Me: WHAT THE-

GPS: Beep.

Me: SHUT UP YOU-

GPS: Beep. Beep. *pause* Beep.

Me: *screams in rage and starts beating the other person up with a megasized pillow* TAKE THAT! *feathers fly everywhere*


[Remember the editing room? SURPRISE! Gotcha. . . . Don't sue me...]

Producer: What do you mean something's wrong?

Me: Well, how the heck did this whole thing start with DRUMSTICKS?!

Bat: First it's super sized keyboards, then now pillows. Come on.

Owl: Whatevs.

Me: Can I at least have something other than a fluffy pillow?

Owl: SCOOT OVER! *pushes tech guy off of chair and sits down at the computer* *typing sounds* Type. Type. Type. Type. Type. Type. Type. Moar typin'. Type. Type. Type. Clickety. Type. Enter.


[Aaaaand, BACK TO THE FIGHT!]

Me: *fumbles football* WHERE THE HE- Oh. Right. *looks down at football* Yeah, this helps A LOT, OWL!

Owl: Hoot hoot.

Bat: Um...I still need a weapon.

Announcer: You don't get one.

Bat: WHY?!

Announcer: Because Wish and Owl are known fugitives.

Me: THAT'S UNFAIR! THAT WAS BACK IN THE NORMAL WURLD!

Announcer: *donut eating is heard over PA system*

Owl: Hm... *morphs into owl and flies over to Announcer*

Me: IT'S DONUT COP! *covers head with football and collapses into fetal position*

Bat: *Grabs opponent* *beats opponent with head* OW. MY. HEAD.

Me: *cries and cuddles football*

Owl: *throws boomerang at me*

Me: *shmack* *cries even harder*

My opponent: Um... *pokes me*

Me: *wails*

Bat: *runs around in circles*

Owl: *tosses Bat a banana* There. Now you have something.

Bat: *looks at banana* What good does this do me?

Me: *grabs banana and eats it, still crying* *tosses peel somewhere random*

Random Tron dude who wants to murder us: *runs forward, screaming* *slips on banana peel, falling flat on face*

*POOF*

Bat: *Steals his disk* YES! *Disk vanishes*.NO!

Me: *hums Mission Impossible and rolls around the arena* I AM INVISIBLE!

Bat: * Runs off set*

Owl: HEY. SOMEONE STOP HIM!

*SWAT breaks down door*

Swat Captain: MISS ME?!

Me: Is it just me, or is this like a repeat of time?

Owl: I SHALL ESCAPE! *flies through open window*

Bat: It's new to me.

Me: YOUR OPINION ISH NOT VALID! *shines flashlight at Bat*

Bat: *screams* I'M NOCTURNAL!

Me: Yeah, and I'm a cat... Waaait. Hold on.

Doctor: HA! TOLD YOU!

Me: -.- Seriously man?

Doctor: What?

Me: You.

Doctor: Me?

Me: No, not me, YOU.

Doctor: What?

Me: *facepalm* I don't even get this anymore.

Doctor's evil twin: HAHA!

Me: So, you still part time?

Doctor's twin: *shuffles feet* Yeah...

Me: Well, that sucks. Right?

Bat: Hey guys, I'm still alive!

SWAT guy: *pepper sprays Bat*

Bat: *screaming* NUUUUUUUUUUU MY EEEEEYYYYYYYEEEEEEEESSSSSSS!

Me: 12971513985713-9613u109458304

Doctor: What... The...

Owl: REFRIGERATOR! *raids fridge*

Bat:*Is knocked out*

Me: *looks around* Uh, Owl?

Owl: *licking lollipop* Hm?

Me: I kinda... Need some help over here.

Owl: Good luck, gurl. Why you so cray cray?

Bat: *Drools, stupid look on face*

SWAT guy: Is that like crawfish? *stares at me hungrily*

Me: See, now that's just creepy. *is stuffed into sack*

Bat: *Is taken along for no reason whatsoever*

Owl: *finishes off lollipop* *waves to me and Bat* HAVE FUN! *walks out back door*

Bat: HELP US, UNGRATEFUL OWL!

Owl: YOU. DID. NOT. *pulls out sharpie*

Bat: Ok I didn't.

Owl: *puts sharpie away* Good boy. *pats on head and shoves a dog biscuit in his mouth*

Bat: *mumbles something muffled*

[Magical translator time! Bat had said: WHAT TH... Mmmmmm... This is actually really good.]

Bat:: THAT'S NOT WHAT I SAID!

[Deal with it, bro.]

Bat: But...fine.


[Later still...]

Portal 1: It's mine, man!

Portal 2: NO! It's mine!

Portal 1: SINCE WHEN DID YOU NEED THIS?!

Portal 2: SINCE NOW!

Portal 1: *looks at blanket* Eh, whatever. *tosses it at Portal 2*

Portal 2: YEA- *blanket is sucked through him and out through Portal 1. And back again.* Man, that's just messed up...

Portal 1: *smug grin on face* Let's try this now. *grabs Bat and tosses him into Portal 2*

Bat: *pulls out I-pod* Aww yeah.

Me: HOW CAN YOU BE SO CALM!? *screams like a madman and runs in circles before smacking into a wall* MY NOSE!

Bat: Meditation.

Me: MAAAAAAAI NOOOOOOSSSSEEEEEEE... *sobs*

Bat: Awww yeah, Owl City, peoples.

Me: *sniffs and pulls out phone* *plays Candy Crush*

[A door opens]

Me: Since when was there a door there? *peeks, and bumps face on the side of the door* OWWWWWW...


[Wish: Hai dere. Soz, yeah. You met Bat. He's new here, so just deal with him. Whatevs people. I'll give you a cookie. *eats a cookie* Or a popsicle. Since Owl doesn't need them anyway.]

(Owl: GIMME THAT POPSICLE!

Oh, and review if you want to see more of Bat)

[Wish: YAY! REVIEWZ!]

{Bat: DON'T LET THEM KILL ME! That's all.}

[Wish: Whatevs, dude. Your opinion is invalid, newbie. *kicks off Empire State Building*]