Porrim ran a hand over her face. She'd spent the Sunday afternoon recovering the prior night's party, and was finally beginning to feel better after a full day of nothing, but she still didn't want to go to class. She dragged herself up anyway, and went to class. The day was uneventful until Kankri came in late to ceramics, and Porrim had an idea of where he'd been since he'd mentioned maybe not being celibate anymore? That and he said something very loudly to Cronus outside the door.
"…your thick fucking skull, excuse my language, then maybe I have more to think about," she heard Kankri say. Another moment passed, and then Kankri came in and flopped into his seat next to Porrim. She was grinning at him, having been an advocate of 'do not go near Cronus he is a sleazy sack of garbage', and was feeling a bit of this 'I told you so' glee, but she wasn't about to get into it.
"Please do not even start with me, Porrim," Kankri sighed, rolling his sleeves up.
"You don't want to talk about it, Kanny?"
"I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't call me that. We've talked about this. That's something you call a child. Do I look like a child to you, Porrim? No, I don't. It's been three years, for, excuse me, "fuck's" sake. I think we can safely retire that particular term of "endearment". Call me anything but that, even my other nickname. I'm actually okay with that one."
"I'm not calling you 'Insufferable', Kanny." Meenah was behind that one. Apparently he reminded her of someone from a book, The Sufferer, and she thought 'The Insufferable' was funny. And, yeah, Kankri was pretty insufferable. "Well, not unless I'm using it as an actual adjective. And even then, probably not to your face. Well…" Porrim thought it over for a moment.
"It would be nice if you'd at least use my proper name in front of Karkat, then. It really kind of erodes my credibility, and I don't need that in the proximity of a fresh-faced youngster who clearly thirsts for knowledge. Why would you want to sabotage a fine young man's education like that?"
"Rolling my eyes here."
"Could you go roll them somewhere else?"
"Typical," Porrim muttered. "A woman threatens your masculinity and you kick her out."
Kankri scoffed. "No. Just no, Porrim, we're not doing this."
"Yes, how dreadful it would be for your sixty-nine-million word mental essay to get bogged down by even the faintest reference to the roles of gender in our civilization."
"Look, it's not that I'm insensitive to your concerns on that topic. I'm interested to discuss them with you on an academic, primarily theoretical level."
"Theoretical?"
"I just think there is inherent danger in muddying the waters of my personal discourse by introducing social issues which are suspect at best, thus consuming crucial resources from the limited cache of rhetoric which propels these narratives. And furthermore, one could argue it's more than a little problematic, offensive, even, for you to be appropriating the lexicon of sensitivity used to advance awareness of major issues, thus reducing it to the level of buzzspeak and pseudoscience. It makes it more difficult for those of us who are genuinely focused on positive change to be taken seriously, that's all."
"Appropriating? PSEUDOSCIENCE?!" Porrim balled her hands into fists the more Kankri talked about this.
"I'm sorry, I just don't think there's much there. Yes, we have specialized roles for both sexes in the process of reproduction, and there are slight social ramifications for the way civilization has evolved, but I still fail to see how gender factors into this discussion in a way that can be effectively and rationally problematized. Where is the room for unexamined privilege in the dichotomy? I don't see it. And appropriating the talking points and awareness-raising tactics for dubious issues like this is, frankly, frowned upon, to put it politely. Such appropriative gestures only serve to marginalize and invalidate those subject to serious, real-life struggles and oppression, and I guess I'm a little disappointed to see you being so blithely and inappropriately appropriatory."
Porrim took a deep breath. "Kanny, I'm starting to feel just a little bit triggered by all this 'appropriation' bullshit." That was the only way to get him to shut up.
"Oh! My sincere apologies. I should have done a better job tagging my statements, but for future reference, it's helpful to alert your conversational partners to your triggers well in advance. Should I give you space to call your current partner? And if so, who exactly would be filling that quadrant right now?" Well that was pretty fucking rude.
"Alright. You're in one of your bratty moods. I won't bother, then." She went back to her work and let Kankri brood.
Porrim's phone went off not long after she got back from school, and whether she'd answer depended on who was messaging her. Luckily, it was Latula.
gamegrlCredz [GC] began pestering genderedArticulate [GA]
GC: yoooo!
GC: popo merrygamz!
GC: you would not BELIEVE what just happened
GA: I wasn't under the impression you were the type to gossip.
GC: oh DAMN you got me
GC: well does it count as gossip if it's about me?
GA: In that case, please do elaborate.
GC: well ya know how me and tunez have been dating for like, EVER, but never really got physical?
GC: i didn't really think he'd be ready for that since, uh
GC: well our relationship backtracked after the accident
GA: But now?
GC: popped mah cherry, grl!
GA: Congratulations.
GC: is that really something to congratulate?
GA: Yes?
GA: I don't know, it is something of a landmark.
GA: At least, in a relationship.
GC: i dunno
GA: Well you messaged me to tell me, I presume.
GA: Clearly you thought a big enough deal of it to be excited to share the news.
GC: fair point
GC: i wanted to talk to you about it tho cause you're the most
GC: sexperienced?
GC: idk if that's like an offensive thing to say
GA: It's not, simply a factual statement.
GC: kayyy, didn't wanna come off as slut-shamey or anything
GA: You can't shame a slut if she has no shame.
GA: I don't think sexual proclivity is anything to be ashamed of.
GA: It's not as if I've cheated on anyone.
GC: GURL you know i wish i had your kind of confidence
GA: You know you let yourself get too bogged down in your insecurities
GC: yah but i can't help it
GC: sometimes i feel like i'm just not good enough
GC: idk, like not feminine enough or resilient enough
GC: definitely not smart enough
GA: Latula, you're not giving yourself enough credit.
GC: man i knowwww
GC: you tell me that every time we talk about this
GC: and then you tell me that i overcompensate with the RAD GRL schtick
GA: You do.
GC: i can't help it!
GA: I'm not saying it's a bad thing, Latula.
GA: Just that there may be a better way to deal with your insecurities.
GA: If this is how you cope for now than far be it from me to stop you.
GA: Are you still on anxiety medication?
GC: yeah but trying to get better without it
GA: That's good.
GC: i wish i could talk about this kind of stuff with mituna but we always end up talking about his issues
GC: which is fair but like
GA: No it isn't.
GA: It's not fair to you.
GC: actually yeah
GC: and i kind of exploded at him today
GA: What do you mean?
GC: idk it was like a lot
GC: before the sex
GA: You yelled at him first?
GC: it's a long story
GC: i yelled cause i hate to see him down on himself
GC: and he did the same
GC: and we decided neither of us are broken
GA: You two certainly have an interesting dynamic.
GA: But hey, as long as you're both happy.
GC: fo SHO
GC: LOVE that boy
GA: Well at any rate, sounds like you deserve a night out.
GA: Whether to forget about your insecurities or to celebrate.
GA: I know a bar that won't card you.
GC: oh man that would be RADICAL
GC: but we have school tomorrow
GA: Don't be ridiculous.
GA: I know for a fact that you can miss your first few classes, and I won't be drinking, if you're concerned about having a DD.
GC: i mean…
GC: ok
GC: yeah RADICAL
GC: sounds TIGHT popo merrygamz
GA: That nickname…
GA: It is… it is just so awful.
GC: oh whoops
GC: want me to switch back to pornstar?
GA: …Merrygamz will be fine.
genderedArticulate [GA] ceased pestering gamegrlCredz [GC]
And so, Porrim prepared to go to the bar that night. She had a friend who was friends with the bouncer and bartender, and they let them in without an issue. Now, Porrim wasn't out looking for attention, but she certainly didn't turn it away, and most of it got deflected to her anyway, since Latula was taken. This wasn't to say guys weren't trying to hit on Latula, too, but she always started a conversation with "sorry, I have a boyfriend". And Porrim was still lucky enough to run into her friend, a friend she'd met at a feminism seminar at Skaia University. And, well, it was not so much 'run into' her friend as it was 'witness her throwing a drink in the DJ's face'. Porrim took a breath and approached the girl.
"So, Rox, you get snubbed by the DJ or something?"
"Porrim! What is up!" the blonde grinned at her. "And God, no. He's my cousin, but he's a real piece of shit."
"What kind of piece of shit are we talking about, like Ampora levels, or…?" Roxy gave a puzzled expression, and then had a quick moment of realization.
"Oh, you meant the older one."
"Yeah."
"Okay, that makes more sense. Um, no, not like 'skeezy guy hitting on me and throwing a pity party for himself to get laid' piece of shit. Like physically and emotionally abusing his youngest brother piece of shit."
"Ohhhh…" Porrim muttered. That made sense. It seemed like everything was connected with her friends, and their families. It was weird how much of an impact they all had on each other without even realizing—the Strider family drama (which Porrim had just been informed of; specifics, anyway) of course affected the Lalonde family drama because it was the same family, and then that drama had spilled over to Kanaya's emotional state. It was weird and existential to think about.
"Honestly I don't even know why I'm here tonight, he's the only reason we can even get in. I came out just to throw the drink at him I guess? Not like it's going to change anything."
"Come on, let's get a table, we can talk about it. Latula!" Porrim waved Latula over and the three of them sat on the patio outside.
"Hey GIRL!" Latula greeted Roxy. "I'm Latula."
"Roxy Lalonde," Roxy introduced herself.
"So, Rox, what's this with your cousin?" Porirm asked.
"Oh. So I got a message from Dirky yesterday asking if I'd heard from Dave but I didn't see it until later cause I was HELLA hungover from my own Halloween party, and I didn't know what was going on so I went to talk to Rose who said that Dave messaged her and he was hiding out at his friend John's place? Anyway so we all do some prodding together and through a confusing exchange of Pesterchum chats figure out that Braiden is a complete wad. So, he's been doing this training shit and basically saying Dave isn't tough enough and all this like… oh fuck, what did Rose say? Stuff about toxic masculinity. She knows about it, she talks to Dave more. So we tell my mom since she's like, I dunno, like a responsible person and she knows Braiden really well; they're like siblings even though they're not siblings because fuck if my family isn't screwed the hell up," she punctuated the statement with a laugh. "And she spent yesterday chewing him out on the phone, and then talking to John's dad and like, figuring out legal stuff? Anyway I knew Braiden was gonna be here tonight and like up until now he and I always got along but I wanted to tell him I think he's the worst scum imaginable. Like, who spars with a 14-year-old kid?" Porrim and Latula exchanged a look. That was a lot to process. A waiter walked by, and Roxy flagged him down. "Hey, can you get me a martini?" she asked.
"Sorry, Rox, I'm not supposed to be serving you anymore. Braiden told us how old you two actually are and I technically should probably kick all three of you out."
"Oh come on, one more for old time's sake?" Porrim batted her eyelashes at him, and he blushed.
"Well, uh… sure. But this is the last time," he warned.
"Nice!" Roxy celebrated. "What about you, Por, you getting anything?"
"No, I'm the DD for the evening."
"Tules?"
"Aw RAD, uh, can I get a vodka lemonade?" The waiter nodded and scurried off just before someone else walked by. Braiden. Porrim only vaguely recognized him, blond hair poking out from underneath a plain black baseball cap and thin triangular shades covering his face. His teeth were grit and his face looked vaguely sticky, like he'd washed it but didn't get everything off. He placed his hands on the girls' table and leaned across towards Roxy, getting uncomfortably into everyone's personal space.
"Dick move, Rox. You come to my workplace and assault me?"
"Throwing a drink in a bar isn't assault. Girls face worse on a daily basis and if you think child abuse and abandonment doesn't warrant more than that then you are deluded!"
"Keep your voice down, you little shit, or I'm gonna lose my job."
"You should! You deserve to lose everything! You're losing your cousins, you lost your brother, you're gonna lose your other one, and you don't deserve the wealth you have."
"If we weren't in public, I'd—"
Braiden was losing his temper, and Porrim saw a moment of opportunity. "Oh my GOD, did you just grab my boob?" Porrim shouted. "The DJ just groped me!" People turned and stared.
"What? No I didn't! Alex, you saw," he said, turning to the waiter, who was just returning with Latula and Roxy's drinks.
"I saw… I saw you giving these three a hard time…"
After something of a ruckus, Braiden got fired for harassing the guests. Porrim pursed her lips, glancing at Roxy as Braiden was escorted away. "Well, there goes our connection. He certainly does deserve it, though."
"He deserves to be in jail," Roxy spat.
"We all wanted him out of here," Alex said. "He's a fucking douchebag. So, uh, thanks, Porrim."
"My pleasure," she said, a small smile forming. Normally she hated taking that kind of action, but this? This was a good cause.
