The road stretched out for miles. She didn't know where they were or where they were going to and she didn't dare look at Nathan right now.
What the fuck had just happened?
She kept seeing his fucking smirk before his eyes went black.
Why was he smirking?
She kept thinking back to that moment in the dark room, when the gun had been at her head. How she had craved for it all to end, all the thoughts, that bottomless feeling of loneliness. But most of all.
To end the constant fear of death.
A suffocating black shadow, creeping up from behind. Not knowing how or what would happen, but just lying like a sitting duck, waiting, that was the worst part. Was that why he was smirking? Because he knew, and he couldn't wait for it anymore? She couldn't stop thinking about it.
She felt herself shudder.
A million thoughts were rushing around her head.
Chloe, the storm, Jefferson, the dark room, Nathan, Chloe, Warren, Jefferson, the gun, the storm.
The gun
The gun
Glinting and glimmering in the darkness as Jefferson's light went out. She stared at it, resting on the dashboard in front of them. Motionless.
What the fuck were they going to do? They had just killed somebody. She might not have been the one to pull the trigger, but she was certainly the one who wanted him dead. Wanted to watch him die.
Nathan was frozen beside her. Deadly quiet. His eyes spaced out and staring into the distance. She could only wonder what he was thinking right now, but she was too afraid of the answer to ask.
They drove on in silence. The orange glow of the sun beaming down, washing over their pale, tired skin.
"Where should we go?" Max was the first to speak. She wasn't sure how long they had been driving for.
When Nathan didn't reply she turned down a side road, making sure they were hidden from view. No doubt Sean Prescott would be looking for this car. Looking for them.
She turned the ignition off and they sat in silence.
"Could Jefferson really see the storm Nathan?" Max asked him
Nathan shifts in his seat, moving his hand to his face, sighing. There was a long, drawn out pause. She didn't want it to be true.
"We need to get rid of this fucking car" He says, ignoring Max. "My dad will be looking for it". He glances at the gun, but leaves it sitting on the dashboard as he gets out, slamming the door behind him. Max hesitates, grabs the gun, shoving it into her jeans, underneath her grey jacket, and follows him.
Nathan has already started sprinting up ahead, towards some small shops.
"Nathan, wait" Max breathes, running out of breath as she tries to keep up.
"We need to get some money, so that we can get another car" He tells her. His voice emotionless.
He walks to the nearest cash machine. Quickly slipping in a card and withdrawing as much money as it will give him. He does this with several different cards, before throwing them onto the ground.
"Won't he be able to track us through that?" She asks
He glares at her "No shit, Caulfield. That's why we need to move fast. Get as much cash as we can, and pay for everything else in cash, okay?" He snaps at her, shoving notes into her hands.
"Okay" She nods, shoving it into her pockets. Her satchel, her phone, her camera, are all gone. She doesn't know where. Probably in the bunker. None of it seems important right now.
He stashes the rest of the cash into his jeans, and they set off down the road.
"Nathan" Max calls out, as he charges off down the road.
"Nathan, will you just wait a moment" She calls, tugging at his arm. "NATHAN!"
She finds herself bellowing at him, trying to get through.
He spins round to face her, his eyes daring her, goading her to mention what just happened.
She wants to ask him about his visions. Whether he saw Jefferson die. Or Rachel. Or Chloe. Or her. She wants to ask about his love for Rachel and how it feels to love someone with every inch of your soul. She wants to ask what it's like to kill a man and if he saw the lights leave Jefferson's eyes. She wants to ask him how he feels seeing them all die, if he too is terrified of death. If the thoughts are eating away at his mind. She wants to ask all of these things, but instead settles on
"Where are we going?"
He breathes out, thinking. "I…" he begins, swallowing harshly, paranoid eyes surveying the street.
"I don't know. I don't have anywhere to fucking go. Nowhere safe anyway"
Max's brow furrowed. She couldn't go to Blackwell, surely they would look there. Or Chloe's house. Or her own.
She feels a strong wind rise up through the back of her jacket, the cold metal of the gun pinching at her side.
"We need to stop this thing right?" She asks him, not waiting for his reply.
"The Lighthouse. I saw the lighthouse fall. Don't ask me why, but I think we should go there" she tells him, only realising now how true that might be.
Something in his head clicks together
He nods silently.
His eyes dart around her, settling on something beyond her shoulder. He grabs her and runs towards the bus pulling up on the other side of the road.
Through the bus window, Max stares in horror at the dark clouds looming overhead. She turns to stare at Nathan, whose staring down at his hands.
"Nathan" she whispers to him.
He looks up and across her, sighing
"Nothing's changing" he mutters, wringing his hands together in front of him. She reaches over him, lacing her fingers through his, and he squeezes back tightly, swallowing hard.
She feels like they've been walking for hours to reach the top of the lighthouse, but she knows it's only been a few minutes, if that. The soft breeze from before is getting slightly stronger now. A warning to stay away.
They reach the top and she turns to face him
"What now?" She yells, some of the sound getting swept away in the breeze.
He shrugs his shoulders at her, before looking out over the bay, his eyes fixated. The orange glow of the sun has disappeared under the thick grey clouds above.
"We need to get inside" She tells him, but he's not listening to her.
She sighs and circles the lighthouse, searching for an answer. For some sort of clue. She looks at the bolted door, and tries in vain to open it, shaking the handle and pushing against the metal with her shoulder.
"Nathan" She calls out, willing him to help her.
He doesn't respond.
She walks back around to the bench, to find him sitting on it, his back to her. His shoulders are shaking and she can hear his loud sobs, raw and unrelenting as they wrack through his slender frame.
"Nathan" She whispers, sitting beside him. She places an arm on his back gently, but it make him cry harder.
He holds his head in his hands, his fingers weaving through his brown hair.
"I loved her" He cries
"I loved her so much" he chokes out, tears and snot smeared over his bruised face.
She rubs his back gently, holding him just as she held Chloe in the junk yard. Nathan's words echoing those of the blue haired girl that night.
She wondered if Rachel Amber knew that they both loved her this much. Who had she thought of in those moments before death? Did she love them this much?
The wind snuck in, biting at the gaps in her clothing, the cold metal of the gun pinching her side, and she pulled Nathan closer as his cries got swept away into the oncoming storm.
