Bonnie had been to Portland once before, though she had been too young to remember. Her grandmother had taken her along with her to visit a friend, a quiet man who had given her a piece of candy. That was all she could recollect but as Kai drove her along the Columbia River towards the city she wondered if Kai had also met that man…The Parker family home was north of the sprawling Forest Park, acres of woods and waterfalls that were a hallmark of Oregon.
"We lived out in the middle of nowhere is this huge house. Neighbours thought we were some fundy cult or something. They were kinda right," Kai quipped as they drove over a bridge, Portland city a few miles away. Bonnie looked for fire and smoke but a thick morning mist obscured the view. It would burn away by midday, according to Kai.
"Is the airport really on fire?"
Kai smirked. "Don't believe me? The wind blows the smoke and fumes up north, towards Washington. Fuel leaks into the river, sets it alight for a few hours after the reset but it soon burns itself out. I'll take you to see it tonight, it's pretty cool," he flashed a grin.
He did not take her to the family home, not yet. Talking about the place and his family clearly made him uncomfortable, his usual chatter muted. Instead he took her close to the huge park west of Portland. There was a house up in the hills overlooking the city and with a view of the snow-capped Mount Hood in the distance. Driving along a spiralling road in a wealthy neighbourhood they passed through a set of gates, stopping outside a huge house with a grand stair case leading to the entrance.
"This rich jock my sister had a crush on lived here. He'd throw these huge parties. I hated him but he sold the best weed so every time I come back this is where I stay. There's also a Jacuzzi and a cinema room with surround sound."
"You're such a stoner, you know that? I thought Jeremy was bad…"
"The only thing we have in common. Come on," he took her hand and pulled her up the stairs. Bonnie had been in many empty houses since being stuck but every time she entered a strange house she always felt a thrill, that knowledge that she was trespassing, but there was no homeowners or police to catch her. Kai acted like everything he touched was his and he felt no such dilemma, only enjoying the novelty of having her by his side.
He cooked them dinner and then afterwards they watched Ghost on a huge screen that took up an entire wall. In the dark he kissed her, fingers threading through her hair to cup her skull. The stinging pain that sometimes came with his touch now made her shudder and groan with a strange pleasure, her fingernails scraping his shoulders. They kissed until the movie credits rolled up the screen and the entire room plunged into darkness. The only light was from his hands, a shifting and gentle orange-red flare that never touched her skin.
He took her to a park overlooking the city that night and Bonnie got her first glimpse of Portland. They were safe west of the rivers, but as he had told her the airport on the banks of the Columbia river was a smoking ruin. The city was mostly dark, a few electric lamps shone but as midnight passed the smoke cleared and for a few moments Portland was shining and intact.
"Boom," Kai uttered quietly as they sat on a pair of swings, watching the scene unfold. Bonnie, her breath trapped in her throat, watched as cars crashed into each other or slammed into shop fronts and trees. Explosions went off one after the other like fireworks. Portland was a city famous for it's breweries and the alcohol contained within these distilleries caught and soon raged through the narrow streets.
"Jesus…" Bonnie breathed as apartment blocks started to burn and planes nosedived into the river. Gasoline floated on the water and was quickly set alight.
"The Pearl District will be pretty much gone in a few hours. It's all the alcohol that's the problem. The west of the city gets away pretty much unscathed, thank god. Imagine that forest fire…" Kai trailed off as the airport exploded, sending flashes of light through the night sky. It felt like some angry god was striking the city. Bonnie forced herself to look away from the inferno and back at him. Cool wind blew against her neck, sea air but she started to smell smoke.
"I can't believe this is real but it is. If I had never met you and decided to go to New York or DC…" she shook her head. She had been thinking of going to a major city, just for something to do. She likely never would have made it back alive. Kai stared at her, twisting his swing around.
"Maybe you would have been okay. This place is different. Sometimes you can hurt yourself but it's fine after the reset. Hasn't that happened to you?"
Bonnie shook her head. "Not really. I had a bad cold a month after getting here and it took me a long time to recover," she shrugged, looking back at the flaming city as Kai stared at her fixedly, a frown between his brows.
"I thought you were like me," he muttered with something like accusation but Bonnie was too focused on the fire to really listen. They sat on the swings watching the city burn for the next hour in silence and while the sight made Bonnie feel oddly elated Kai's mood was sullen. He took her back to the house but did not siphon from her, as was normal, complaining he was tired. Bonnie relented, sensing he needed space. Coming back home for Kai was hard, though he said otherwise. He was secretive, for all his banter, and there was a darkness in him that his jokes could not conceal. She was not scared, she had experienced her share of darkness. She was surprised how well adjusted he was after being isolated for so long but there was a hollowness that he was slowly showing her. The years alone had worn him down in places and that process was irreversible.
He was putting off going back to his home, to search for the missing ascendant but Bonnie assured him that this time he would not have to face it alone. At those times, when her fingers gently took hold of his Kai would look at her, breath inhaled and chest inflated but whatever words were on his tongue stayed there. Pain and guilt kept inside can solidify and it was a battle to break it apart and share, she knew that all too well. He had killed his mother, she had learned that early on but he could not tell her clearly whether it was an accident or not. He honestly did not know. This she still believed.
"I've been here for a long time and no matter how much I think about it I just don't know…it happened so fast. She got infected with a magical disease. Well that's what my dad called it," Kai smirked, not looking at her. It was late morning and they were in a stunning rose garden which had a view of the hazy city. It was a beautiful sight. She did not know what made him talk about his mother's death so suddenly but she was glad. Something had been weighing on him since he took her to see the fires.
"What happened to her?"
"She was kinda obsessed with keeping my dad and her kids safe. My dad was powerful, as coven leader, and I think she felt inadequate or something. She dabbled in dark magic, which is whatever, most witches do," he said with a hand wave as Bonnie stiffened but said nothing. "She got into this powerful, ancient magic and it twisted her up inside. I didn't know the details, why or how it was happening, only that her magic started going crazy. It would burst out of her and she would hurt people. My dad covered it up but nothing could stop it. Finally he got so desperate he asked me for help. Well, more like demanded," he said with a small smile, his gaze unfocused.
"You siphoned her magic?"
"Yeah. It didn't like that," he laughed hollowly, shaking his head. "It – cause that wasn't her anymore – fought back, started draining me and wouldn't let go…so I didn't stop until it did."
He looked at her as she nodded sadly in understanding. "You were defending yourself. It – it doesn't sound like it was your fault. It wasn't her anymore."
"Maybe but sometimes it doesn't feel like it happened that way, that a part of me wanted her gone. I felt relieved." Bonnie inhaled but he carried on talking. "But then I remember her taking me and Jo to this place, when she would talk to me...I'm sorry then, despite the things she did to me. I told my dad that and at first he believed me but then it changed. He's a paranoid freakazoid and he started to think I just sucked up the power that was making her batshit. Didn't matter that I always lose the magic, he thought it was hiding inside me like a spore," he grinned at the assumption, not looking at her.
Bonnie felt a chill go through her. "He thought you were infected?"
"Yup but it's impossible. When I siphon magic, whatever it is, it gets converted into its purest form. I'm like a filter," he smiled, lifting his eyebrows. "I can siphon through touch but it's in my cells, like your magic is."
"That's pretty cool."
"I know," he flashed a grin at her, sitting back on the grass with a sigh. The aroma of roses around them was rich and heavy. "He never trusted me anyway but after that he was especially annoying. It was like that for two years before he snapped and," he waved his hand around them.
"He locked you up," Bonnie said and they grew silent. Could Kai's imprisonment be down to more than a father's prejudice and the death of his wife? Was this entire universe created to contain a person he thought infected with evil? An evil that could spread? If her grandmother was involved then that seemed the only reason why she would condemn someone to an existence of isolation. The planning and power that went into creating this looping world was not thrown together in a day. This was premeditated.
Bonnie looked around the park, which was serene and beautiful and suspected the truth. "This place is a quarantine. What if it was originally meant for your mother?"
Bonnie gazed at Kai, who shrugged and offered her a red rose with a smile on his face, like she had not even asked. Kai was strange, verging on off but some carrier of evil? She knew monsters and the man she was falling for was not one.
After a week exploring the areas of Portland they could – sadly Voodoo Doughnut did not exist in 1994 and if it did it would just be a smoking ruin – Kai shook her awake one morning. He was tired, yawning but wired as he drove them north, through the dense trees until they reached farmland.
"My dad sold real estate and he got super rich. He could have lived anywhere but nope, the back end of nowhere it was. The house was inherited, generations of my freaky family have lived there."
His jaw clenched as they drove, fields on either side obscured by mist. The eclipse happened at 9:28 in Portland and as they reached a small town the light grew dark. Red and blue lights flashed as they approached a house on a residential street with many police cars outside. Bonnie turned to Kai as they sped past.
Kai shrugged. "People died. Remember that newspaper you found yesterday?"
Bonnie had read a newspaper which reported a family had been murdered in Portland. The article had been smeared and unreadable, a printing accident because every newspaper was the same. Kai yawned again, his tenth by Bonnie's count, and flipped over the cassette and pressed play. Two Princes started playing and Bonnie grinned as Kai groaned.
"Oh I love this."
"No fucking way."
Twenty minutes and one argument about musical taste later they reached the Parker House. It stood in two hundred acres of grass land, a big white house with blue shutters and a wraparound porch. Children's toys littered the neat grass. It was only missing a white picket fence.
"It's beautiful," she said with surprise.
"Expecting the Bates house?"
"Kinda? You made it sound so…cold."
"Appearances are deceiving," he said, staring up at the house. For him it was home to awful memories, ones that he found hard to share but from what she knew she understood his hesitance.
"We don't have to go in, not if you don't want."
Kai shrugged. "I'm fine. Let's get this over with," he said, voice light but his back and arms were tense. Inside the house, which seemed far too large for two sets of twins and a man, was clean and bright but with the usual mess of having small children. Bonnie moved into the living room as Kai disappeared into the kitchen. The light shining through the windows hung suspended, like time within the house was stuck in that early hour. Despite the peace and quiet there was a suffering in that hush.
Music started playing as she looked at the numerous pictures over the walls, mostly portrait photographs of twins. She quickly found pictures of Kai and his twin, Josette. Bonnie stared at the young woman for a long time, the face familiar but her attention was grabbed by another picture. A set of blonde twins, around two years old.
"Liv and Luke. This has to be them. Kai? I'm sure this is them."
"You can tell?"
Bonnie gasped at the sound of his voice right behind her and dropped the picture. Glass shattered at their feet as Bonnie jumped back, heart racing.
"Don't do that!"
Kai offered his hands, a grin twitching his lips as she sighed in annoyance. She bent down to pick up the glass and he went down with her.
"This place spooking you out yet?"
"Only you so far," she fired back and he chuckled before slipping the picture free of the glass.
"Olivia and Lucas. I still resent my dad for not calling them Luke and Leia like I suggested."
Bonnie laughed but then yelped as she cut herself trying to sweep up the glass. Kai pulled her up and inspected her finger but it was only a small injury. Bonnie sucked on her finger and motioned at the picture. "Luke and Leia? Your dad was sparing them years of bullying."
"Lucky them," he said, looking at a picture of his father on his wedding day. Kai's mother was a beautiful, small boned woman with masses of curly hair. She reminded Bonnie of Liv.
She touched Kai's arm. "Sorry."
"Forget it. Let's start looking," Kai pulled her away from the pictures to the kitchen, which was large and again littered with toys and children's drawings. A large bouquet of tulips and irises stood centre of the round table, handmade cards placed around it. It had been Mothering Sunday on the 8th.
Kai barely registered them. "Because of my ability I can detect when magic is close. It has to be really weak or cloaked for me to miss it," he explained as they looked through a bookcase filled with recipe books, Kai pressing his hand to the wood to suck out any concealing magic. Nothing appeared.
"So can you feel me?" she asked from a crouched position. Kai looked down at her with a small smile.
"Yeah so I know your magic is getting stronger," he pulled her up against his chest, arms crossing around her front. "I can smell it," he whispered into her ear.
"What does magic smell like?"
"There's nothing to compare it to really and it depends what kind it is…yours is rich, lot of different notes...intoxicating. You make me so fucking hungry," he groaned, nuzzling her neck and she smiled, head tilted back.
"Come on, you can eat later."
"Promise?" he smirked at her but she ignored the suggestive tone with a laugh and pulled out of his arms. They had not had sex yet but it had come close; Bonnie was ready but Kai kept pulling back last moment. He wanted her but with that want came a desire that could harm her. He did not go into details but he mentioned once being with a witch and had almost drained her to the point of death. He had never touched another witch since. The fact that Bonnie was the only reliable source of magic available and the loss of that would render Kai stranded was a fact she only realised later...
They searched through the house. Despite the size there were only a few rooms, mostly for guests. A locked door led to an indoor pool but Kai dismissed it, saying it had been going through a renovation at the time and was too dangerous to search. He had done so before. Bonnie stepped out into the hallway on the first floor as Kai searched through a guest room.
"Why stay in such a big place if there was only a handful of you?"
"Huh? Oh well my mom and dad planned to have more kids…We had guests from the coven sometimes too. It didn't feel so empty at those times," Kai said as he stripped a mattress. "I hated it. My parents barely tolerated me so you can imagine what those old school Gemini thought of me. I was locked up in my room most of the time until they left."
Bonnie made a noise of sympathy and turned. The hallway was long, with two doors and a linen cupboard on either side but as she turned towards Kai she caught sight of more doors. She blinked, looked back but the extra doors were gone.
"You okay?" Kai asked suddenly behind her and she nodded with a frown.
"Seeing things…Nothing?"
"Nada."
"There has to be some clue here," she said with exasperation but Kai said nothing, just gazed at her. "Where's your room?" she asked.
"You think they hid it in there? The last place they'd think I'd look?" he smirked knowingly. He had searched through every inch of the house for years and found nothing. "My room's in the attic."
"Oh…" she looked up, feeling a flush of relief and Kai laughed.
"What? Thought they chained me up in the basement at night?"
"Well…"
"Trust me, it's not much better," he sighed and then with an inhale he showed Bonnie up a short flight of steps and unlocked a door. It locked from the outside. The room beyond was dark and still as the rest of the house. She followed him slowly, her eyes adjusting to the gloom. The roof sloped and Kai had to bend his head until they reached the centre of the attic. A narrow bed was placed under a small window which issued a beam of light into the room. Music and sports posters lined the walls while books, vinyl and magazines were stacked everywhere. Kai slumped down into a chair by his desk, swinging around to face her. A child's baseball mitt and figurines lined the windowsill.
It was not the dank, cramped basement she imagined but it served the same purpose: isolation. Kai was raised within a family who would not touch him, who had shunned him for his ability. They would not stick him in a place where he – or they – were in touching distance. The attic stretched the entire length of the house and the only door was thirty paces away. The loneliness must have been crushing for a child but maybe it was an escape from the people below who thought he was an abomination. Bonnie moved to him, noting a drop of blood on the desk. She sucked on her cut finger before she placed her hand on top of his head, stroking.
"I'm sorry, we shouldn't have come back here."
"It's okay. It really doesn't bother me anymore," he put his hands on her hips, tugging her a little. He smiled wistfully. "You know how often I dreamed of having a girl up here?"
"Surrre. Didn't you say your coven was famous for cloaking spells? I'm sure you managed," she looked at the unmade bed and smirked. Kai's lips pursed, a gesture that meant she had got one over on him. He tried to be sweet but often there were little lies wrapped up in those words. Sometimes big ones…
Kai looked at her fingers threaded through his, the raw red wound on her skin. "You're different."
"Because I'm your girlfriend?" she said and then bit her lip but the word was out. Kai's eyebrows lifted and his lips curled up slowly. His eyes shone playfully.
"You are?"
"Uh, well. Maybe?"
"You don't seem too sure."
Bonnie clucked her tongue and pushed his shoulder. "Stop it. You know what I mean."
He laughed and stood, enjoying her embarrassment. "You're cute when you get all flustered," he cupped her face and gazed into her eyes. "You're officially mine now."
He kissed her forehead and laughed throatily as he pulled her into his arms. When she pressed her chest to his she could not tell if it was her heart thudding so hard or his. His white t-shirt shone in the light from the window, making his hair glint and she thought of a plant struggling to grow in the dark, reaching for any sustenance. His ever present hunger was rooted deeper than magic and it never left her how she had found him. She had been days away from joining him in that lake…
"If…when we get out we'll do it together," she whispered and he looked down at her.
"Do what?"
"Live."
They had searched through every room, finding nothing but painful memories. As the sun sank Kai was itching to leave. He said it did not bother him but it was visible in the way he held himself, how he turned away rather than stare or touch anything in the house for a moment longer. Though disappointed they did not find any clues about the whereabouts of the ascendant Bonnie was just as relieved to be out of the house as Kai, who's mood picked up as they drove away. He sang animatedly to The Police.
"Every little thing she does is magic, every little thing she do just turns me ooon."
"You seem chipper."
"Ask her if she'll marry me, in some old fashioned waaay…" he grinned and she rolled her eyes and looked away to hide her bashful smile. Kai sighed and left Sting to sing the rest. "I've searched through every inch of that damn house and grounds. Years and years. I think I'd be more pissed than happy if we did find something, just because I'm so sure there's nothing there."
Bonnie sighed, watching the trees flick past. "So what do we do now?"
"I dunno, what do girlfriends usually want when they're stuck in a time loop?"
Bonnie licked her lips as she smiled. "Hmm well we're able to go anywhere, no waiting lists…so this girlfriend would expect entry into the best restaurants and clubs the country has to offer. Does that sound about right?"
Kai nodded as they neared Portland. "Sounds good to me. Thanksgiving is in two days, my favourite holiday…"
Bonnie grinned, imagining the finery of Kai taking her to a fancy restaurant, the clinging dresses she will try on and the amazing food he will cook for them. However along with pleasure came pain.
"God it's almost December. I keep forgetting what the real date is."
He nodded. "You can lose complete track if you're not careful. That's why I try to celebrate holidays, it helps."
Bonnie stared up at the clear dusk sky. "So we could be exchanging Christmas presents in 80 degree heat?"
Kai shrugged as he turned into the house they had been using. "Don't worry, I'll make it worth your while."
That night Bonnie dreamed of Mystic Falls trapped in a bubble, like a snowglobe only no flakes fell. The town was on fire and no matter how hard she pushed against the impediment she could not leave. Hands suddenly pressed beside her and flared red, sucking away the barrier. Fire leaped up around her and she screamed as her hands bled. She turned back but Kai stood in her way. His red hands were outstretched, as if to help but he laughed and laughed as the fire consumed them...
Bonnie woke with a start, sweat beading her skin. Heart pounding and feeling unnerved she got out of the strange bed and peeked in on Kai. He was asleep but tossing and turning. He was in the grip of a nightmare, just as she had been. She leaned over him but as she got closer his hands pulsed with red and he grabbed her leg.
"Kai!" she yelled, wincing as he roughly dragged magic from her. It took him a moment to realise what was happening before he let her go. He breathed raggedly, sweat coating his skin.
"Fuck. Sorry," he plucked at his t-shirt before pulling it over his head. Bonnie stopped him before he could get up to shower, circling her hand around his wrist.
"Did you dream of fire?"
He blinked, gulping and then nodded. "Mystic Falls under a weird dome. I think you were stuck."
They both nodded and stared at each other with confusion. "Just a nightmare, my nightmare," Bonnie said. She had once been plagued with visions but if that was the fate that awaited her than she would call it a figment of her imagination.
"How?"
"I'm sharing my magic with you. We're connected," she whispered and he leaned closer as she touched his chest. "It's okay, go back to sleep."
She moved to leave but he pulled her to him, his gaze hooded. "Don't go."
Bonnie sat, watching his chest rising and falling and the want for her was suspended around him was like a heat mirage. She could sink against him and melt, dissolve until only her magic remained. Would would they look like striped bare to their fundamental cores? Her magic a golden seed buried too deep while his magic a thing with teeth near the surface but inside there would be nothing, just a starving yearning for what grows inside her. She wanted to plant it in him, make it take root and flourish.
He touched her lips gently with his fingertips and she closed her eyes, waiting for the sting to come but his touch was replaced with the softness of his lips. The kiss was long and deep, taking time until all thought of the nightmare that brought Bonnie to his bedside faded. She moved onto her knees as Kai sat back and pulled her to lie beside him. She brushed her fingers through the hair over his ear, making him close his eyes as she leaned down to kiss him again. He was in a pair of boxers, Bonnie in an oversized t-shirt that stuck to her back. She glided her bare leg along his while her hand trailed over his chest, unintentionally tickling him. Kai pulled back with a smile but quickly captured her mouth with a growl. His hands rubbed down her back before palming her ass. He drew a finger underneath the lace and cotton fringing, an impediment between them, until Bonnie moaned into his mouth. She pulled back, gasping as she started to grind slowly against his hip. She was wet and her sensitive, hard nipples brushed against the fabric of her tee.
"God, I'm gonna lose it," he groaned and fisted the sheets below him but he did not siphon. She mewed and took hold of his hands and placed them back on her body. He bit his bottom lip as she dragged a finger along the erection denting his underwear. She did this three times before slipping her warm hand under the elastic and gripped his cock, freeing it. Kai groaned again and his head fell back against the pillow as she slid her hand up his length, paused and then pumped back down just as slowly. She moaned as his hand slipped up her shirt and palmed her breast, squeezing as she squeezed.
"Do we need condoms?" she asked and he froze, not expecting the question.
"I don't - I don't think so. Do you?"
Bonnie shook her head. She had not had a period since she arrived. Her hair had not grown and if she was like Kai she would never age. If her body did not change then how could she get pregnant?
"When we get out," she murmured and then kissed him hard, moving to straddle him. She drew herself along his erection, pressing it down against his belly and he whispered her name, his thumb brushing her clit through the soaked cotton. Her body was thrumming with desire, shock waves of it and she needed to feel him inside her. It had been so long, longer for him and as that fact settled so did she. He had not been with a woman for eighteen years. Bonnie bent down and cupped his face with a tender hand, her short hair framing his face.
"I hope this will be worth it."
"Worth what?" he asked, dazed. He was too aroused to really process what she said.
Bonnie smiled and touched her nose with his. "The wait. I know it's been a long time and I -"
"Shh, don't get performance anxiety now," he pressed his fingers to her mouth and she laughed, a gorgeous rich sound that filled the room. Kai sat up and pulled her t-shirt over her head, freeing her breasts. He stared in awe before kissing the valley between them, inhaling her scent. She started to tug down her knickers but his hands battered hers away and pulled them down her legs, making her lie flat until it looped around her ankle. Hands on his shoulders she gyrating her hips in a figure of eight motion, making him slick as she sat up, straddling him again. Kai closed his eyes tight, feeling how wet she was as his tip started to glide between her labia and further. He entered smoothly.
Mouth pressed to his she took him in slow, Kai not moving until he was deep inside her. She paused as they moaned together before drawing him back out and on the second try Kai thrust back in slowly. Bonnie moaned, eyes closed as he pulled out and thrust in again with more force. On the third and fourth thrust he moved in and out with ease, her walls contracting around him. His hands gripped her hips and back, her ass rippling with each of his thrusts, her nipples soft against his slick chest.
"That's so - god. I can feel your magic," he groaned and she opened her eyes. He smiled in amazement before kissing her, hands ringing her arms. He thrust harder, faster and Bonnie pulled back, gasping as she felt the familiar wave of an orgasm. It was too soon but this had been weeks in the making, years for him. She sat up, arching her back and began to ride him with abandon, gyrating and bucking. Kai swore and sat up, hands grabbing at her shoulder and back as he pressed her to him. Bonnie looped her arms around his back and leaned her head back, mouth open wide in a silent scream as pleasure rose and rose, waves of it that made her body shudder against his. Kai held her to him as he came, plunging upwards rapidly until his movements become slow and loose. His ejaculation felt hot inside her, coating her cervix like something molten. It was not painful but heated her from the inside out.
He collapsed, breathing heavily and Bonnie remained sitting on him, one hand pressed against his chest. They said nothing, just listened to the sound of their breathing and the pounding of their hearts. Finally when their bodies had cooled he pulled her down to him and stared into her eyes with an intense regard.
"I'm not your boyfriend Bonnie and you're not my girlfriend. This is more, so much more. There isn't a word for what we are. I don't understand what this is but in here or out there this is all that matters. You are."
Bonnie inhaled, shaking and nodded. "I know."
"Say it," he gripped her hair, gaze even more intense.
"You're all I love."
His gaze flickered with something. Shock? Joy? Victory? It was too fast to see before he pulled Bonnie down to kiss her but it would be something she would pour over at night in the terrible months to come.
