DISCLAIMER: I do not own The Hunger Games nor any of its components. Mags and the idea of the Hunger Games belongs to Suzanne Collins. No copyright infringement intended.


Part Seven: Of Fear and Beauty


That night, I noticed that Nereus decided to sleep in early. He took his dinner quickly and swept into his room and didn't respond to anyone. I couldn't help but worry, only to stop myself and give myself a reminder that he was trying to kill me. Or at least, he will be very soon.

The next morning, Nereus decided to leave without me to the second day of training after breakfast. When I went down through the elevator to the gymnasium, Megan who was smiling up at me with a grin tackled me.

"Good morning, Mags!" she chirped. I spotted Glitz slowly walking up to us, a sleepy wave in greeting.

I nodded back to him and gave Megan a smile. "Morning."

We made our way around, stretching as we snapped out of our sleepiness. Well, it was more like Glitz and I were trying to wake up. Megan was just a bundle of joy in the morning.

After the trainer gave us the same speech ("Don't kill anyone. Don't try to kill anyone. And don't, for the love of goodness, hurt anyone either!"), all twenty-four of us dispersed again. I noticed Nereus avoiding eye contact with me, following Luciana and that District 7 boy – whose name I learned was Kenneth – but not jumping into their conversation.

Megan and I made our way back to a station with plant identification where we sat and relaxed while Glitz ran off somewhere. As soon as I lay sprawled on the mat though, I noticed a large shadow hovering above me.

"Hello," a musical voice said above me.

I opened my eyes and saw a beautifully sculpted face peering down at me with a humorous smile. His pale blue eyes gazed over my form in amusement, the corners of his perfect mouth quirking upward.

"Gabriel!" Megan exclaimed with a grin. She patted a space on the floor between herself and me. "Come and sit with us!"

"Do you mind?" he inquired to me. I shrugged in response and sat up as he plopped himself on the ground next to me. Watching with wary eyes, I saw his attention turn toward Megan who was eagerly showing him various plants that intrigued her. I quickly realized that he was the other combatant from District 12 from their familiarity.

"Look, and this one you can't even find in Twelve. Isn't that amazing?" she asked him with wide, sparkling eyes, holding up a blue flower.

He chuckled musically, ruffling up her hair and replying, "Yes, it is, squirt."

I decided to pipe up, "So, do you guys know each other?"

Megan glanced at me with eyes that surprisingly seemed to not want to reveal anything. With carefully chosen words, Gabriel responded, "Yes. Her older sister and I were very good friends."

"Were?" I wondered. I opened my mouth to ask what had happened to her sister but wisely chose not to when Gabriel gave me a subtle shake of his head. Instead he turned his attention to Megan completely and I realized that somehow, I had gained another ally.

When it was lunchtime, all of the tributes ate together in one cafeteria-like area. Without even asking, Gabriel, with all of his beauty, graced us with his attendance. I noticed out of the corners of my eyes, Nereus and Luciana sitting at another table with Kenneth. A tall lanky boy approached them with easy grace and himself comfortable with them, looking over them with obvious arrogance as the girl watched him warily and Nereus scowled at him. After a few seconds though, the tension lifted as Kenneth cracked a joke and the tall boy smirked and Luciana smoothed her hand over Nereus's forearm, soothing him. When I saw her fingertips graze against his skin, I nearly jumped out of my seat, my cheeks flushing red but stopped when I saw Gabriel's cocked eyebrow at me.

"What?" I muttered indignantly, viciously biting at a roll while Megan giggled irritatingly at me.

"Nothing," he responded with raised brows, seeming to be silently laughing at me.

Before I could retort anything to him, Glitz plopped himself next to me with a tray of food, a girl at his side. He looked at Gabriel suspiciously before cracking a fake smile and offering a hand.

"Glitz, District One," he introduced with forced friendliness. His pale eyes shifted toward me questioningly and I shrugged noncommittally.

"Gabriel, District Twelve," Gabriel responded politely, taking his hand and shaking it once.

"Guys, this is Kinda." I noticed the girl sitting on his other side give a small wave with a cheerful smile. She was young, probably only a year older than Megan but held herself up with a sort of confidence that the Seam girl lacked.

"Nice to meet you all," she said. She turned to me and questioned, "Hey, is the rumor true?"

"What rumor?" I asked, startled by her sudden question.

"You know, about you and Nereus. People are saying things like you guys try to kill each other in each other's sleep and have crazy makeup sex afterward or something," she said, tossing her shoulder-length brown hair. "The sexual tension between you two is so thick you could cut it with a butter knife."

My mouth fell open, unable to speak as my cheeks flushed scarlet. Gabriel and Glitz burst out into laughter while Megan looked both embarrassed and quizzical.

"I mean, if it's not true, then that's fine, you know? But if it is, at least someone is having fun here," she said calmly, breaking apart a sandwich and eating it carefully with slow bites. Her green eyes turned to me and raised her eyebrows, awaiting my answer.

"Of course it's not true! He and I barely speak to each other!" I exclaimed, mortified at her precocity. This only fueled the boys' laughter, making me scowl at them darkly. I quickly downed my bottle of water, attempting to regain my normal complexion before I realized that most of the combatants were glancing over at our rowdy table curiously.

"We seem to be attracting a lot of attention," Gabriel mused carefully. "Especially your little boyfriend's, Mags."

With a completely fake yawn, he stretched out his arms behind him, letting one arm drape over the head of my chair. I looked up to the ceiling in exasperation while Glitz and Kinda snickered at Nereus's appalled expression. With some weird feeling of gratification, I saw Nereus glaring darkly at Gabriel who only politely smiled back.

"Oh, Gabriel, don't be mean," Megan prodded at him. "He really likes her, you know?"

At that, the water I had been sipping sprayed from my mouth onto Kinda's face as Glitz had immediately moved out of the way. I immediately started choking and took a handkerchief from Gabriel who was chuckling at my antics. Kinda looked a little less than pleased as Glitz howled in laughter. She whacked him on the arm, making him regain his composure though there were tears of laughter still in his eyes.

"Nereus and I are not anything like that!" I declared once I was able to speak. "He and I haven't never even talked to each other before this and we most certainly don't talk very much now." My thoughts flashed to the night before where he couldn't even look at me in the eye during dinner. "Besides, he makes it clear to me that he doesn't want to interact with me."

"I wouldn't be so sure of yourself," Kinda said, her green eyes twinkling over the freckles on her face as she wiped her face with a napkin.

I opened my mouth to refute that but Megan hastily stopped me, asking Kinda and Glitz, "So how was training so far?"

With a groan, I sighed and turned away from the conversation, noticing four pairs of eyes blatantly staring at our table. Nastia and Spade, along with the Shadow girl and her boyfriend, Cim, had expressions of indifference. Startled, I looked back at them, realizing that each pair was staring at me as if observing a rat in an experiment. Hastily, I turned away from them and tried to ignore their eerie gazes as I spoke with my allies.

- : -

Dinner was a solemn affair again. Emer repeatedly told us to stop being so unfriendly and learn to become allies, it was a common cause for our district, we couldn't afford to be picky with each other, we were each other's best shots of surviving, etc. Eventually, I drowned out his lecturing and I could tell from Nereus's blank stare into nothing that he was doing the same. My eyes studied him carefully. He was really attractive, I mused. He had a deep cut green shirt on and a pair of charcoal slacks, his dark hair still damp from a shower. He twirled his fork absently before casually turning his head, realizing with a start that I had been staring at him.

My cheeks flushed pink as I recalled Megan's words:

He really likes her, you know?

Why was I letting it get to me? He wanted to kill me. He wanted to go home like me. No matter what Emer said about common causes and utter rubbish like that, it really just boiled down to the fact that there was only one victor and he expected it to be himself, much like I was fighting to win too. With a shake of my head, I dispersed any thoughts of our lunchtime discussion and speared a mushroom with my fork, chewing slowly.

After dinner, I stretched in my room after changing into a nightgown, feeling stiff from doing practically nothing besides learning how to set traps and make knots the entire day. I finally laid in bed but my thoughts kept turning to Megan's words from earlier. Why would they think that?

I rolled onto my side, my head resting in the crook of my arm as I peered through the darkness, wondering how life would have been any different if I wasn't in the Hunger Games. Would I be sitting near the windowsill, watching the sun rise and set every day and become a fisherwoman like so many at home? Maybe Nereus and I could have been friends. I raised my hand, watching the moonlight twinkle against the silver band that Arlen had given me on my index finger. I wondered what she was doing and if she missed me. Or if anyone was going to miss me at all.

I feel a familiar sensation prickle in my eyes and my heart contracted into a small ball as reality crashed into me. I'm probably never going to go home again. It became hard to breathe and I realized that hot tears were running down my cheeks.

I was so scared.

With a shuddering breath, I forced myself to sit up, wiping away my tears furiously with both hands and demanded myself to stop crying. After a few minutes, the tears subsided and I knew that there was no way I was going to be able to sleep any time soon. I grabbed a robe to throw over my shoulders and padded my way out of my room, out onto the patio where the gratifying wind bit at my wet cheeks. I breathed in the fresh air, missing the saltiness from back home and the sands that stuck to my toes.

Slowly, I strolled over to the pool that glowed an unnatural blue hue from the fluorescent lighting. I stripped my robe off and unconsciously threw it to the side. Without even a single thought, I jumped off the edge and dove perfectly into the water. Like an embrace, the water surrounded me and glided against my skin perfectly, making me feel at home. I stayed underwater, my legs kicking until my lungs screamed for air. With a heavy heart, I lifted my head from the waters, flipping my long hair from my face. Wiping the water from my face with my fingers, I opened my eyes, only to stop dead in my tracks.

A familiar set of hazel eyes stared down at me, looking almost mesmerized by something. I furrowed my brows at him, questioning his intentions. When I realized that his mind was in a whole other word, I finally asked,

"What are you doing?"

Nereus snapped out of his trance and looked at me with an eyebrow cocked indifferently. "I could ask you the same thing."
From his mussed hair, sweatpants and tee shirt, I could tell that he had just awoken from his sleep even though it was the dead of night. I suddenly realized that I was only wearing a wet nightgown in front of him and dunked underwater, making my way to the edge and pulling myself out wordlessly. As I wrapped myself in my robe, I realized Nereus was stripping down to his boxers before diving into the water himself, his body arched into a perfect arc in the air before crashing into the water softly. I watched as his shoulders moved vigorously, his legs kicking and his muscles rippling.

For some reason, I was entranced. Thoughts of what everyone, including Nereus himself, said eluded me as I watched him swim so strongly. His kicks and his strokes were so powerful, seeming so desperate as he lapped around the pool. Unknowingly, I sat on the edge of the pool, my knees close to my chest.

To me, he looked the most beautiful at that moment.

After a while, Nereus finally stopped and glanced up and seemed relieved to see me still there. Slowly, he made his way towards me with calm strokes, using the edge to keep himself bobbing up next to me.

"Why couldn't you sleep?" he asked me, his hazel eyes wrinkling in concern.

For a moment, I didn't say anything. Against my better judgment, I opened my mouth and told him honestly, "I was thinking about home."

"Home." He seemed to taste the word on his mouth. Nereus glanced up at me, asking, "Do you miss it?"

I sighed. "A little bit. I miss how everything was salty and how you couldn't get away from the smell of fish and seaweed. And I miss how busy everyone seemed in the mornings when the sun was still coming up."

With an unreadable expression, he gazed over the still blue waters of the artificial pool. It just represented everything that wasn't real to us. It wasn't like the dark, mysterious waters of the sea that constantly rocked back and forth. It wasn't like how uncontrollable the waves or the currents were.

"I know how you feel."

For some reason, I didn't doubt the sincerity his words. My thoughts kept rushing to that moment during training. We stayed in silence for a few minutes before I asked him point-blank, "Why did you protect me from Glitz?"

He reluctantly turned his head from the water to my face. He seemed to study my face as if to ask me to take back the question so he wouldn't have to answer it. I merely stared back, waiting for his response.

With his strong arms, he lifted himself out of the water and sat next to me, dripping water onto the ground and seeping into my cotton of my robe. With a sigh, he finally said,

"I don't know."

"You don't know?" I reiterated blandly, propping my head onto my knees. I turned my face to him and he refused to match my eyes. Instead he looked towards the sky, which was dark and cloudy with not even a single sparkling star resting in it.

"I lied to Emer. I've seen you before this." Nereus's face seemed to contort into what seemed like suppressed pain. "I'd always noticed you after that one day."

Puzzled, I looked at him weirdly. What on earth was he talking about?

He clenched his jaw before telling me, "I dreamt about it. The day your dad died."

I was only eleven when it happened. A freak accident on a fishing trip. No one had expected him to die. There was a storm that came but it could have been avoided. From what the crew told me, my father had hit his head while trying to save one of the younger kids on the boat and tumbled overboard. They tried to save him but he was long underwater before they could even try.

"That was so long ago," I whispered, turning my eyes away from his chiseled jaw that was still tight.

"Your dad saved me when I was thirteen. I was being stupid, I should have listened to everyone but I thought that I could help that day. It was my first time on a boat."

Somehow, I wasn't mad. I purposefully never asked anyone who the kid was because I was afraid that I was going to hate him. I knew my father wouldn't have wanted that from me. But now that I knew here and now, probably just days before my own death, I wasn't mad.

"I won't ask for your forgiveness because I know I won't earn it," Nereus said solemnly. "But when he was reaching for me, you know what he told me when I was too scared to let go of the mast?"

I shook my head slightly.

"He said, 'Do you know my daughter Mags? She's a pretty girl, only a couple of years younger than you. If you let me help, you can play with her back at home, I promise you. You can earn a friend from this, so let go.'

"He noticed how I never had any friends when I was young when no one else did. He noticed how I spent all my time on the docks because I didn't know how else to be friends with anyone since all I knew how to do was provide for my little sister and brothers."

Tears streamed down my cheeks and I struggled not to sob. For so many years I avoided talking about my father and here I was, sitting next to a competitor in the Hunger Games as he tells me about my dad's last moments on Earth.

"His last words to me were 'Promise me you'll be with her' when he finally hit his head and he couldn't keep himself on board. And I couldn't fulfill that promise.

"I saw you sitting on the pier the next day. You were sitting just like how you are now, just sitting with your legs curled under yourself and your big blue eyes staring out into space. And I saw how empty they looked."

I remembered that day. I had felt like the world was falling apart around me. Ever since that day I would stay near the waters, hoping irrationally that I would see my father's boat in the sunrise or the sunset. When I finally realized he was never coming back, I hated the sea. I wanted to die. And that day, I dove into the water, determined on not coming back out because I wanted to be near my father. I let the ocean swallow me whole that day.

"When I saw you jump into the water, I didn't know what to do. I thought you would come back up and when you didn't I had thought about your dad's words and how he wanted me to be there for you. So I swam to you and pulled you out and when I saw how you wouldn't breathe even after I carried you to shore, I felt like I was in hell."

At this I snapped my head towards him, my cheeks stained with tears. I stared at him with a mixture of vexation and shock. I had thought all these years that the sea had carried me back to shore. I thought that I washed back up because –

"I breathed into you and you came back to life. When you finally started getting your bearings I left. I didn't want you to see me or notice me. I wanted you to forget that I even existed because I was the living proof that your father died." Nereus clenched his eyes shut. I noticed his knuckles on either side of him were white from keeping them closed tight. His jaw was tight, and the muscles in his neck were stiff. It was like he was trying to quell his passion and guilt as he waited for me to attack him, to hate him and to curse him.

"Nereus –"

"After that day, I always watched you. You began to smile. You started to laugh. And that was enough for me. I stayed away from you even though you drew me in like a moth to fire. I stayed away because I knew that I was going to only cause you hurt." Nereus gave me a weak smile that broke my heart. "And now look at us. I'm pitted against you in this and I'm expected to kill you. What the hell am I supposed to do?"

I don't know why I did what I did. Maybe it was out of shock from everything I heard. Maybe it was because Nereus finally showed me that he didn't hate me and that we both didn't know what to expect. Maybe it was because I was so terrified and so alone.

But when I pulled away from him I knew that he felt the same way. He was scared, lonely and hurt. His hazel eyes looked into mine desperately before his lips took mine again, his arms wrapped around me in a strong embrace.


A/N: ... So I guess Kinda was sort of right about the UST, eh? I mean, I think that Mags and Nereus were always attracted to one another but both had a guard up. And now you can see why Nereus did.

Anyway, thank you to threeofus for favoriting. Seriously, it means the world to me! ^_^

Please don't forget to review/favorite/follow/PM me/whatever you want! It really helps to inspire me to write more. :D

Love,
Quiddity