This is one of those hard chapters that I have to get just right. Hope it lives up to expectations.
DISCLAIMER: Yeah, sure. I own Edward Cullen too. :P I never get my way.
Jo was the first to wake up. Brief flashes of what had happened went through her head and she shot up with a gasp but quickly regretted it. The world spun and she quickly let her head fall back to stop the dizziness.
"...Ugghh... Mom? Bobby?"
Bobby came into view with water and pain pills.
"Jo? How ya feelin?"
"Uh..." Jo felt the bruising around her neck and then the bump on her head. "Like shit."
"Expected that much. What do you remember?"
"I was with Sam. Joshua came in and then... started acting really weird. Then I got to be human rag doll and that's about it."
"All right. Take it easy, I've gotta go check on Dean and Joshua now."
"What happened?"
"Joshua was possessed. Dean fought him off trying to save Sam."
"Is Sam..."
"Sam's with Ellen." That's all Bobby would say, it'd be enough for now. "Gotta check on the boys."
Bobby realized that Joshua took a few blows from Dean, but as for being unconscious he blamed demon possession and knew he would come around sooner or later. Dean on the other hand looked terrible. They cleaned up the blood from his nose bleed and split lip. Dean would not be happy with the remodling done to his face.
AFEWBORINGHOURSLATER
The first thing Dean noticed is that it was dark when he opened his eyes. The second thing came instantaneously. His head was throbbing. He tried to put pieces together but it was kinda foggy. Flashes of images in his head. Joshua--Joshua possessed. Fists flying at him. He began to ask himself what happened until the last image flashed. A pair of eyes peering out at him. Afraid, lost, confused, tortured... broken. Sam. All Dean could gather from the incident was that Joshua was possessed, Dean got the shit beat out of him, and Sam was there. Was Sam ok? What if he wasn't? What if Joshua...?
Dean started to get up and let out a groan. Just as he was sitting up the lights flicked on doubling the headache.
"Dean?"
"Ahh... Bobby."
"God boy. Lay back down, you got beat half to death in there." Bobby was at his side.
"...Sam..."
"Sam's in the other room. He's safe."
"And the demon?"
"Gone. And Joshua's fine. He's upstairs, hasn't said anything. He's been keepin to himself." Bobby was now starting to hover over Dean.
"I'm fine Bobby."
"Like hell. You look like crap Dean."
"I'll walk it off, I'm fine."
"Damnit Dean. Just take care of yourself for a minute."
Dean ignored Bobby. "Do... Do you think I can see Sam?"
"Dean... I don't know. I haven't seen Sam since."
"Bobby?"
"Sam isn't hurt. Joshua didn't touch him."
"There's something else Bobby. I can tell when you're holding back."
"Sam... he... Last time I saw him he was in the corner of the room. He won't let anyone touch him. He's not eating or drinking or even sleeping. He just sits there and stares ahead. Sometimes he'll start muttering to himself, but we can't make heads or tails of what he's saying, none of us can get through to him."
Dean hesitated. "I'm going to see my brother."
"Dean--"
"I'm going to see Sam Bobby." Dean stood up and nearly fell back to the couch.
There wasn't any arguing. "Fine... Let's just at least get you cleaned up first."
Dean only nodded.
LETSVISITSAMIKNOWYOUREDYINGTOSEEHIM
Dean's here...Dean's here...He knows where you are. They all lied. They all must want you dead. Don't let them near you Sam. Sam was rocking back and forth and shook his head. No. Maybe you should let them come. If they want you dead, they want you dead. Who says you deserve to live anyway Sam? After all you did to Dean? Maybe you do deserve to die. Sam shook his head again. They were trying to help you. Just let them help Sam.
"NO!" Sam yelled.
"Sam? Sam?" Ellen rushed over and Sam retreated back into the corner.
No. No no no no no. Don't let them near you Sam. They want you dead. God why can't they either just kill you and get it over with or go away? Sam continued rocking. They're probably saving the job for Dean. Yes. That's it. Dean's going to kill you. A different idea nudged at the back of Sam's brain though... What about Joshua? You saw it. He was possessed or something. He was going to kill you. What stopped him? Sam froze. Dean. Dean was there. They were fighting. They were fighting over who would kill you. Dean lost. A small memory nudged at Sam. What was that look Dean gave you? Why did he stop fighting? Why was that look familiar...? Could he...? No. Dean wasn't trying to save you Sam... Why would he? But that look... Sam's eyes scanned through every memory haunted by that look. Something was off. It was the same look Dean had whenever he was concerned about Sam. There was no denying that. ...Maybe...
Sam continued his previous mantra in his head and started rocking again. But everyonce in a while he'd hear the small maybe...
MAYBE...
Dean had stitches and fresh bandages on his face. He stood outside of Sam's room with the help of Bobby and took a deep breath.
"Just remember, don't move too fast. We're trying not to scare him incase he hurts himself."
"Right."
"If he get set off by you Dean, I won't hesitate in dragging you out of the room."
"I understand." Dean nodded. "Let's go."
It was exactly what Bobby had described, but it still shocked Dean. Sam was completely out of it in the corner. Ellen was just sitting helplessly in the chair.
He didn't want to scare his brother so he took a few carefully measured steps towards Sam and gently called him.
"Hey... Sam?"
Oh God... Dean...
He picked up on Sam's breathing becoming faster and stopped his approach and held up his hands.
"Sam, it's alright. No one is going to hurt you."
No no no no no no no. This isn't happening. This isn't real.
Sam payed no attention to the words and Dean took a few more steps.
"Sammy." Dean grimaced when he made a wrong move and pain radiated in his chest.
It is, he's here. God oh God. Why won't anyone help? Why me? Why can't this all be over? Maybe he'll just kill me now. I don't deserve to live anyhow.
Sam shot him a quick glance and started rocking harder.
Dean was no longer supported by Bobby now. He suddenly felt dizzy and the next step had him tripping over his own feet and on the ground.
"Dean." Bobby started towards him but was stopped by Dean's hand coming up.
"I'm fine Bobby." Dean looked up at Sam and how suddenly they were much closer thanks to the fall. He could see the naked panic in Sam's eyes and how he jumped.
"Sorry Sammy. It's alright." Sam was already backing up and Dean stopped.
Right here, this is it Sam... Wait. Why did he stop? Why is he looking at me like that again? Maybe... No. No no no.
"Sam..." Dean reached a hand forwad slowly. Sam was now shaking. If only he could get through...
"Dean, I think--"
"Just wait a minute Bobby." Dean's hand reached Sam's shoulder and he was whimpering. "Hey, Sam."
You are going to die now.
"It's ok. I promise I'm not gonna hurt you."
Maybe... No Sam. No.
"Look at me Sam... Please?" Dean hadn't moved his hand although he could tell his brother was beyond terrified.
Might as well. Sam really saw his brother. He was a mess. But he was right here and could take Sam down for sure if he wanted. But then he saw his brother's eyes... Maybe... Sam didn't look away.
"Sam?"
Maybe? Is he telling the truth? How do I know? I can't. No. I can't.
Dean watched Sam's expression change over and over again. He took in how really broken his brother was for the first time now that he was this close. "I'm so sorry Sam." Dean's voice cracked a little. "I should've protected you better, I--"
You know Sam. You know that look. This is Dean. Sam took in a huge gasp of shock. There was a small amount of relief as he realized that the "maybe" in his head was right.
Dean watched his brother's eyes widen and heard him gasp. He backed up. Maybe this was too much for Sam. "Bobby..."
Bobby was helping Dean up and they froze when Sam spoke coherently for the first time in what seemed like forever.
"D-Dean..." His voice came out in more of shock rather than relief. He kept his gaze on his brother. After a moment they were moving Dean again. "N-no... D-Dean..." They finally stopped and picked up the desparation in his voice.
"Sam?" Dean reached out slowly again as Bobby backed off. He was back at eye level with Sam.
Sam couldn't get his thoughts straight. Everything was overwhelming and his breathes came in giant gasps. What did he want? There was just something Sam couldn't place. Then he felt the familiar hand on his shoulder. That was it. He wanted Dean. He wanted his old big brother back.
Dean could see the pleading in Sam's eyes. In a split second he had his arms around his little brother, desperately trying to keep him safe. At first Sam stayed curled up and rocking, almost as if Dean wasn't there. The suddenly a choked sob of "Dean" and something else he couldn't understand reached his ears and Sam fell against his brother.
"Shh... Sam. It's ok." Dean held Sam.
This definitely isn't real Sam. Dean hates you... Sam ignored his own thoughts for a moment. What the hell... Dean can kill me later, I just don't care right now. He was wrapped up in being with his big brother. The Dean that would sacrifice himself for Sam. But maybe... Maybe Sam.
Dean could only hold Sam and hope for the best as Sam sobs died away and he was finally half passed out and half asleep. Maybe things would be ok.
AN: Yay for updates. I tried to keep this as much about Sam and Dean as I could. Sorry if the "Maybe" thoughts were too much, but everyone is still on shakey ground right now. Maybe is all they have. Tell me what you think :D Reviews rock my salt.
