A/N: I'm having trouble getting in touch with my beta, so this chap has been posted un-betad…again. Hope I didn't make too many mistakes.
Disclaimer: You know, it's getting harder and harder to come up with creative ways of saying the same damn thing every freaking time. Do I really need to tell you all what you already know?
Chapter 7: Dealing With Others
Sarutobi looked at the form in his hand with a slight twitch developing in his right eye before looking back up at the happily grinning subject of the documents photo. "Retake it." He said flatly.
"What? No way!" Naruto declared hotly, his grin vanishing, "It took forever to get a pose that good!"
Sarutobi held up the file, showing Naruto's picture. The boy's face had been painted white with a red spiral while he frowned at the camera with his hand in front of him painted in the same manner. "This is an official document showing that you know a Kinjutsu, take the picture seriously."
"I was taking it seriously! That's why I wanted such a cool pose!" Naruto protested, squinting his eyes at the old man.
Sarutobi sighed and looked over to the figure leaning casually against the wall. "Would you please say something to him?"
Jagaa shrugged, "You told him to get a picture taken, but you never put any guidelines on it. It's not my fault you didn't take his personality into account."
Sarutobi sighed again looking at the Hitai-ate tied around Jagaa's right bicep, the blue cloth it normally set on having been replaced by a black one. 'Why did I think just because he's wearing that, that he would actually start listening to me?' The old man thought ruefully.
Turning back to Naruto, Sarutobi put on a stern expression. "Just retake the picture."
"No." Naruto declared defiantly.
"Retake it!" The old man grated out.
"Not a chance." Naruto growled back.
Their eyes met, a jolt of electricity shot between them, sparking and crackling as their battle of wills continued. A flash of light off to the side cut the contest short and both competitors looked over to see Jagaa with his disposable camera in hand. "What?" He asked innocently.
Sarutobi shook his head and turned back to Naruto. "You will retake the picture."
"We'll see about that!" Naruto yelled before forming the ram seal, "Henge!"
Sarutobi's eyes widened, 'Oh no, that's…' His thought was left unfinished as he was hit full on by the sight of Naruto's Oiroke no Jutsu. A second later, Sarutobi was blasted backwards by the force of his nose bleed even as another flash of light came from the side.
"Dear Kami. Please let that picture turn out good." Jagaa prayed as he loving stroked his camera.
"STOP USING THAT RIDICULOUS TECHNIQUE!" Sarutobi shouted so loud that even Naruto fell back in fright, covering his ears.
"For something so ridiculous, it's sure effective on you." Jagaa muttered just loud enough to hear, earning a glare from the old man.
Unknown to any of them, a pair of large brown eyes was watching the events through the cracked door.
Sarutobi leaned back in his chair, covering his eyes with his hand. "Whatever, I don't care anymore."
"I think that means you win, Naruto." Jagaa said to the boy, who smiled victoriously as he flashed the 'V' sign.
Suddenly the door slammed open and a small, brown haired boy who couldn't be older than ten, wearing a long blue scarf dashed in wielding a wooden shuriken. "Old man, fight me!" He challenged, charging towards the Sandaime…only to trip on his own scarf and land face first on the wooden floor. "Gah, a trap. What a dirty trick." The boy muttered as he pushed himself off the ground.
'Who the hell is this kid?' Both Naruto and Jagaa thought at the same time.
"Young Master," A man wearing a blue sweat shirt, blue Shinobi pants, a pair of circular sunglasses, and a Konoha Hitai-ate completely covering his head called out in concern. "Are you okay? By the way, there are no traps."
Watching the scene, Jagaa reached up and brushed his own sunglasses with his finger tips. 'Mine look better.' He thought smugly.
Standing up, the young boy looked around the room until his eyes fell on Naruto, who was still watching the boy with a confused expression. "YOU!" The boy cried out, stomping over to Naruto. "You're the one who tripped me aren't you?"
"What!?" Naruto yelled, grabbing the boy by the front of his shirt, "You tripped your own damn self, so don't go accusing me!"
"How dare you act so rudely to the Young Master!" The new man yelled. "Do you have any idea who that is? That is the honorable grandson of the Sandaime Hokage!"
Naruto looked up to the man and then back to the boy he was holding by the shirt, but said nothing on the subject.
The boy looked up at Naruto and his face twisted into a sneer. 'Heh, he's just like everybody else. As soon as he hears I'm the grandson of the Hokage, he's afraid to do anything.' Confident in his assessment, the boy started yelling at Naruto. "What's the matter? Weren't you going to hit me? Does the fact I'm the grandson of the Hokage scare you! Why don't you do something you chicken?"
If anyone had been looking at him, they would have seen Jagaa's finger hovering over the shutter button of his camera.
Naruto snapped. "YOU THINK I GIVE A SHIT WHOSE GRANDSON YOU ARE, DUMBASS!" Naruto emphasized his insult by driving his fist into the top of the boy's head, the strike accompanied by yet another flash of light.
'This…this guy…' The boy thought incredulously as he fell to the floor with a thud.
"Young master!" The man cried, dropping on his knees next to the boy.
"This is a great day for pictures." Jagaa commented, smirking at the less than pleased look on the Sandaime's face.
"I'm out of here!" Naruto declared, stomping towards the door, "I'll see you at home, Nii-san."
Jagaa just waved in acknowledgment as the boy stormed out.
"Who…who was that guy?" The boy asked, one hand holding his head as the other pushed up to his knees.
"Young master, you shouldn't concern yourself with a person like him. He is nothing but trouble." The man said as he proudly thumped his chest, "Instead you should…" The man froze mid sentence when he felt a slowly rising killing intent focusing on him. Turning around, he saw Jagaa leaning against the wall and his eye's widened. "Y-you…"
"It looks like you didn't notice I was here. Not much of a Shinobi are you." Jagaa said in a low voice. "Now, why don't you explain to me exactly what you meant by that comment about Naruto."
The man took a small step back. "N-nothing, nothing at all. He's a fine boy." The killing intent in the room dissipated and Jagaa gave the man a smirk.
"He is isn't he? Glad you're such a good judge of character." It was clear there was a hidden challenge behind Jagaa's smirk, but the man had no intention of taking it.
"Ebisu," Sarutobi cut in, "It's time for you to leave."
The man called Ebisu gave a barely audible sigh of relief. "Of course, Hokage-sama." He looked down to were the boy had been kneeling a few moments ago, "Come along Young Master we should…Gahh, where did the Young Master go?"
"I believe he followed Naruto." The Sandaime remarked off handedly.
"AHH, YOUNG MASTER!" Ebisu yelled, bolting out the door to begin his frantic search for his missing student.
"I think that guy has a few screws loose." Jagaa commented after Ebisu had run out of the room.
"He's very passionate about his job." Sarutobi said before frowning at Jagaa, "Did you really need to threaten him though?"
"Huh?" Jagaa asked, turning his head away and scratching his chin, "I don't know what you're talking about."
Sarutobi sighed for what he was sure was the millionth time that day. "Just try to refrain from doing it in the future please." He almost pleaded.
"No promises." Jagaa smirked, turning to exit the room. "Now, I think I'll go look for Anko and see if she wants to go out for drinks."
"Don't forget that you're supposed to come back at seven for your first official Jounin assignment." The Sandaime called after him.
"Hai, hai." Jagaa said dismissively, waving his scarred arm in acknowledgement as he walked through the door way.
Sarutobi sighed and leaned back in his chair and rubbed the bridge of his nose. Dealing with the combination of both Naruto and Jagaa was making the old man feel his years, and he had a lot of them to feel. It also didn't help that the events of the night before had caused a great deal of tension throughout the Shinobi ranks regarding the pair.
For Naruto, it was the fact that he had drawn on the Kyuubi's chakra. A fair amount Jounin had been frightened by the sight, some going so far as to say that the seal was weakening and that the Kyuubi was breaking free, a few even trying to say he should be executed for the safety of the village.
On the other hand, there were also Jounin who defended the young boy. Using Jagaa's metaphor of Naruto being a 'Sheath' and that a blade could be drawn from the sheath when needed, holding firm to the argument that Naruto using the foxes power to fight was no different than using a sword or Kunai. That it was his weapon. Fortunately, it was Ninja such as Kakashi, Gai, Tsume, Asuma, and several other well known Ninja of Konoha that were siding with the boy, so most of the people sitting on the fence about it were more willing to believe them over the others.
'The situation is to be expected though.' Sarutobi grudgingly admitted to himself. He knew that Naruto's using the Kyuubi's chakra would cause problems for Naruto, especially after his talk with Jagaa the night before. It was hard for people to let go of their fears, no matter how long ago it was.
'I wonder if that's why he did it?' The old man asked himself, 'Was he trying to take some of the focus off of Naruto?' Sarutobi's mind drifted back to the night before.
/Flashback/
Sarutobi could only watch as Jagaa held Naruto, letting the boy find release for twelve years of pain that he had held inside. How long the two kneeled together in that moonlit clearing, the old man wasn't sure. He just wished he could have done something to stop things from turning out this way.
'The truth is that I could have.' The old man thought to himself ruefully. It was a fact that he was forced to look in the face more with every passing moment. Knowing that he could have done more for Naruto, but hadn't. It wasn't a pleasant feeling.
A slight glow caught his attention, and the Sandaime looked up to see a small amount of chakra forming at the tip of Jagaa's right index finger.
"Sleep now, Otouto." Jagaa said, touching Naruto's temple with the chakra. The boy's immediately closed and his body went limp in his brother's arms. Putting his left arm under Naruto's thighs, Jagaa lifted him up so that the boy was held in front of him, his arms wrapped around the older mans neck and his head resting on Jagaa's shoulder.
"What did you do?" Sarutobi asked, walking up to Jagaa.
"That was a jutsu to put a person into a dreamless sleep." Jagaa responded quietly, "I made it when I found out that Naruto was having nightmares nearly every night."
The old man felt his stomach twist into a knot, fully aware of where those nightmares must have come from.
"Heh…ha ha…how pathetic." Sarutobi and Jagaa looked over to see Mizuki, having just regained consciousness, being lifted up by two ANBU as he laughed mockingly. "You're just a demon lover. You're no better than that damn little Demon Brat."
Sarutobi was about to chastise Mizuki, but never got the chance as he was hit by a rush of air before a gurgled scream filled the air, leaving the old man staring at the scene in front of him in a state of shock, gasps running through the trees as the two ANBU tripped backwards and away from Mizuki.
Mizuki clutched at the blade that had passed through his throat to come out the back of his neck. His eyes were wide and filled with terror as he looked into the calm face of the one holding the weapon, his cries coming out as nothing but frothing blood and choking sounds.
"You're right." Jagaa said coolly, still holding the sleeping boy in his left arm, "Naruto is a much better person than me. He would have actually felt bad about killing you." Jagaa twisted the blade in Mizuki's throat and wrenched to the right, freeing his sword by cutting through half of the white haired man's neck.
Mizuki's final cry was drowned out by the blood spilling from his throat as he fell twitching to the forest floor. Without a word, Jagaa calmly wiped his blade on the dead man's cloths before sliding it into the sheath on his back. Shifting the sleeping Naruto to better support the boy's weight, Jagaa turned and walked back to the Hokage, stopping as he reached the old mans side. "Know this, old man. Nobody gets away with hurting Naruto. Not your Ninja, not your Villagers…not even you." Sarutobi couldn't find his voice as Jagaa continued to walk away.
"I'll come pick up my Hitai-ate tomorrow, do me a favor and get me one with a black cloth would ya." Jagaa called back as he disappeared into the night, leaving the shaken group of Ninja behind him.
/Flashback End/
Sarutobi looked out the window, watching the birds flutter through the trees as they sang. Jagaa's actions, combined with the way the man had practically threatened to kill the village leader earlier that night, had sparked almost as much controversy amongst the Ninja ranks as Naruto had. Some admired him for his dedication to protecting his adopted brother, while others criticized him for being the protector of a demon and his willingness to kill. One thing that was agreed on by all of them though, was that it was a very bad idea to try to hurt Naruto with Jagaa protecting him.
'The future looks like it will be quite interesting indeed…if not exhausting.' Sarutobi thought, taking a long draw off his pipe. He sat in his chair for sometime, calmly smoking his pipe and enjoying the small moment of peace. Unfortunately, that peace was disturbed by a call of nature.
"The worst part about getting old is that your bladder gets old with you." Sarutobi chuckled to himself as he attempted to push himself out of his chair, 'Attempted' being the key word, because he soon found himself unable to do so. "What in the world?" Sarutobi asked out loud, looking down at the chair as best he could. As he did, he felt his foot kick a light weight object beneath his desk. Frowning, he used his foot to pull the unknown object into view and his eyes widened.
An empty bottle labeled "Elephant Glue" with smaller print of "Worlds Strongest Super Glue" below it, was facing up at him. On the bottom of the label, a small picture of a Smiley Face in Sunglasses was flashing the "V" sign.
Sarutobi stared at the bottle for several minutes, his mind slowly working its way to only conclusion that this could mean, until finally…
"JAAAGGAAAAA!"
X X X X X
Jagaa was about a mile from the Hokage tower when he heard his name echo through the air shouted like a vile curse.
"I guess he finally noticed. I'll have to thank Naruto for getting him to fall out of his chair with that nose bleed or else I wouldn't have been able to pull it off." Jagaa laughed as he continued walking, "I have to say though, for such an old geezer, he has a good set of lungs."
"Indeed he does." A voice said directly behind Jagaa. With a yelp of surprise, Jagaa drew his sword and made a slash for the unknown person. With yelp of his own, the man managed to duck the attack just in time, losing tip of one of his silver spikes of hair. "That was close." Kakashi said sounding relieved. "You almost cut through my book." He held up the item to emphasis his point.
"You almost get decapitated and you're worried about your book." Jagaa deadpanned. "Why are you sneaking up on me anyway…No wait, screw that. How did you even manage to sneak up on me? It's definitely not an easy thing to do."
"Actually, I already knew that because of our meeting five years ago. That's why I used Shunpo from a distance to get behind you before you would notice me." Kakashi smiled and Jagaa's eyebrow twitched.
"May I ask why you felt the need to sneak up on me, especially considering it seems to require a fair amount of effort?" Jagaa asked in coolly.
Kakashi's smile widened. "Because it was fun."
"I see…" Jagaa appeared to be pondering the answer before raising his head a little, "Have I told you today that I hate you?"
"Nope, not today."
"Well, I just did."
"I figured that."
Jagaa shook his head in exasperation while Kakashi continued to smile.
"Whatever, I'm going to go find Anko now. I really need a drink." Jagaa said as he turned to leave, but was stopped by a strange chill running down his spine. "What the hell was that?" He asked, looking around.
"You felt it too?" Kakashi asked, sounding almost smug, "That must mean you really have been targeted."
"What do you mean by 'Targeted'?" Jagaa asked suspiciously.
Kakashi smiled. "Oh you'll find out in approximately…5…4…3…2…1…"
"KAKASHI, JAGAA, I HAVE FINALLY FOUND YOU, MY ETERNAL RIVALS!" Gai's shout rang out as the man himself dashed up with a dust cloud following his wake.
Jagaa turned to Kakashi in confusion. "Did he say 'Rivals'?"
Kakashi nodded.
"As in plural?"
Another nod.
"Meaning he's saying that both of us are his…uh…Eternal Rivals?"
Another nod, this time accompanied by a smile.
"How exactly did this happen?"
Kakashi just smiled.
"…I hate you."
Gai finally finished his mad dash, sliding to a stop in front of Jagaa and Kakashi. Taking a few quick breaths, Gai straightened his back and snapped into the nice guy pose. "Hello my Eternal Rivals, it is good to see you both on this Youthful morning!"
Jagaa could only stare at the strange man in amazement before turning back to Kakashi. "I may have asked this before, but is this guy really okay?" Kakashi simply shrugged in response once again.
"KAKASHI!" Gai shouted, making both the other men jump, "I wish I could use our meeting today to break our tie, but unfortunately I have come to challenge Jagaa to our first ever competition, so you will have to be patient!"
"Hmm, did you say something?" Kakashi asked, looking up from his book. His outward appearance was completely calm, but mentally he was doing cartwheels and back hand springs in his excitement over Gai having found someone else to bother.
"OH MY GOD!" Gai screamed out, grabbing his head, "KAKASHI, THAT ATTITUDE OF YOURS IS SO HIP AND PISSES ME OFF!"
Jagaa watched the exchange with raised eyebrows. At Gai's reaction to Kakashi's statement, the events of the other night at the Jounin bar ran through his mind, causing Jagaa to smack himself in the forehead. "I get it now…that would be just my luck." He muttered.
"NOW, JAGAA," Gai yelled, pointing at the dirty blonde, "I CHALLENGE YOU TO OUR FIRST EVER CONTEST!"
Jagaa scratched the side of his head. "Uhh, does that mean you want to fight me?"
"It doesn't have to be a fight!" Gai clarified, "Just a contest in which only one of us can be victorious, thereby proving which one of us is superior! Seeing as this is our first contest, I will even allow you to choose the event!"
Kakashi watched in anticipation as Jagaa put his chin in his hand in thought. With any luck, Jagaa would win the first event and increase Gai's desire to defeat him, subsequently reducing the strange Jounin's desire to beat Kakashi himself. As the thoughts of possible freedom ran through his mind, Kakashi noticed something strange.
Jagaa was smiling.
However, the fact he was smiling wasn't the strange part. It was the way he was smiling. There was something about it, something Kakashi felt he should recognize, but wasn't quite sure why. He shook his head lightly to clear away his thoughts of freedom and focused more on the situation.
"Okay," Jagaa said, his smile still in place, "I'll take you up on your offer."
"YOSH," Gai shouted in excitement, "WHAT WILL THE CHALLENGE BE? I'LL DEFEAT YOU NO MATTER WHAT YOU CHOSE, MY NEWEST ETERNAL RIVAL!"
Jagaa's smile widened slightly and he spoke enthusiastically. "Yosh, then I challenge you to race! First one to do five hundred laps around Konoha is the winner!"
Gai gaped at Jagaa incredulously before tears of joy started pouring down his face. "THE FLAMES OF MY NEW ETERNAL RIVAL BURN SO BRIGHTLY! KAKASHI HAS NEVER BEEN SO PASSIONATE ABOUT OUR CONTESTS!" Gai made yet another nice guy pose and smiled with a sparkle of teeth of his teeth that Jagaa didn't seem to mind (A small fact that made Kakashi realize the advantages that could come from wearing sunglasses all the time.), "NOW, MY NEW 'NUMBER ONE' ETERNAL RIVAL, LET OUR CHALLENGE COMENCE! AND SHOULD I LOSE I WILL DO AN EXTRA THOUSAND LAPS AROUND KONOHA!"
'He's been made the number one, Jagaa's Number One!' Kakashi thought in exhilaration, 'I'm almost as good as free now!'
"All right, let's get started!" Jagaa grinned and turned to Kakashi, "Kakashi, make your self useful and call the start for us."
Still looking calm on the outside despite doing mental cartwheels of joy, Kakashi took his place off to the side of them as both Gai and Jagaa prepared themselves for the race. "Are both of you ready?" To confirming nods answered him, Gai's making look like his head would fly off. "All right then." Kakashi raised his arm, "On your mark…get set…GO!"
A blast of wind tore through the street and a trail of dust and dirt rose up along the road. Kakashi watched down the street, smiling in victory. 'Gai may never bother me again if Jagaa is this willing to compete with people. I'm so happy right now I could cry...I won't because that would ruin my image, but I really could if it weren't for that.' Feeling incredibly lucky for the way things turned out, Kakashi started turning to leave…only to freeze in place at the sight of the starting line.
Jagaa was still there. Standing with his arms folded and watching the fading cloud of dust.
As Kakashi gaped in disbelief, Jagaa turned to him wearing the same strange smile he had worn while making the challenge. "I guess he wins." Jagaa said with a laugh before turning and walking off.
Kakashi stared after him, his mouth hanging open beneath his mask. "He…He…He tricked him…" Kakashi mumbled, "And knowing Gai, he won't even notice he was tricked until he's finished the race." Suddenly Kakashi remembered exactly where he had seen that smile before. It was the same smile he had when he taped that note to the Hokage's back a year ago, and the same type of smile that Naruto was well known for.
It was a Prankster's smile.
He watched Jagaa for a little longer before following the black clothed man, a sort of awe shining out of his visible eye. 'I think he just became my hero.'
X X X X X
Naruto walked casually down the alley, his arms behind his head and whistling a tune. He was still a bit irritated by the fact the old man had wanted him to retake his picture despite the amount of effort he had put into it, but it was slowly fading with each step he took. He never was able to stay mad at the old man for very long, probably because the aged Hokage had been one of the few people who had been kind to him when he was little. That didn't stop the boy from vowing that, when he became Hokage, people would be allowed to take whatever kind of picture they wanted for their profiles.
Later in life he would reflect on this vow and realize that would be a very bad idea…for various reasons.
As he walked, Naruto came across something extremely odd. The fence he had been paralleling had a section of it that looked like the wood was put in left to right instead of up and down. Upon closer inspection, Naruto also saw a pair of small hands curled around the top of the section, making it obvious that it was a cloth being held up by the unknown person in a poor attempt to conceal their self by blending into the fence.
Naruto stared at the strange sight for a few seconds before clearing his throat pointedly. "You know you're not fooling anyone, right?"
The cloth gave a guilty twitch before a young voice spoke behind it, "Heh heh, just what I would expect from you." The concealing cloth was thrown away to reveal the same boy that Naruto had walloped earlier, looking at Naruto and smirking, "You are quite perceptive to have noticed me."
'Uh, I would have had to be blind not to.' Naruto thought before addressing the boy again. "What do you want, Chibi?"
"Train me!" The boy commanded.
Naruto was almost floored by the response. "Huh!?"
"I want you to teach me that move you used to defeat my Grandfather!" The boy emphasized, dropping to his hands and knees, "Please teach me, Boss!"
'Boss?' Naruto turned the title over in his mind a few times, 'It does have a nice ring to it.' He admitted to himself before looking down at the boy again. 'Eh, why not? It's not like I have anything better to do.'
"Okay Gaki, I'll teach you my super powerful and unrivaled Oiroke no Jutsu!" Naruto announced dramatically, "You'd better be grateful!"
The boy sprang to his feet and saluted smartly, an eager grin spread across his face. "YES SIR!"
Naruto nodded in approval, "So, what's your name kid?"
The boys smile stretched further than ever, "Konohamaru, my name is Konohamaru."
X X X X X
"You sure she'll be here?" Jagaa asked Kakashi as the taller man led him into a popular dango stand.
"She usually is around lunch time." Kakashi replied without taking his eyes off his book, "She likes dango almost as much as Naruto likes ramen."
"I really hope your exaggerating." Jagaa said in an almost fearful tone.
Kakashi shrugged, "Maybe I am, but not by much."
Jagaa shuddered slightly at the thought. It had taken him almost a year to get his taste for ramen back after the first time he saw Naruto shoveling it down his throat. He'd rather not lose his taste for dango right now. Well, at least if it was true he had some kind of warning this time, where as with Naruto it had been a complete shock to his system. "Any way," Jagaa said aloud, pulling himself out of his thoughts, "I can't find her with all these other people here. Do you see her?"
"No, but that's okay." Kakashi smiled, "As long as she sees you, we won't have to look for her."
Jagaa tilted his head to the side in confusion. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"JAGAA-CHAN!"
It was the only thing Jagaa heard before the air rushed out of his lungs and he was tackled to the floor by the very person he had been looking for. 'Oh, that's what it meant.' Jagaa thought weakly as he struggled to regain his breath while Anko straddled his waist, smiling down at him.
"Hi, Jagaa-chan. Did you come here looking for me?" Anko asked the prone man who lay unmoving beneath her. Her smile turned into a small frown at his lack of response. "Jagaa-chan?"
"Leave me alone. I'm dead."
Anko smirked down at the man beneath her. "That's okay. I've always wondered what it would be like to be a Necrophiliac."
Jagaa tilted his head a bit so that Anko was looking directly into his face. "That's a bit…disturbing."
"Isn't it though?" Anko laughed.
"Now might be a good time for you two to stop." Kakashi said, pointing his thumb to the side, "You're starting to scare people."
Anko and Jagaa twisted their heads in opposite directions as to examine the crowd surrounding them before focusing back on Kakashi and replying in unison. "So?"
Kakashi sighed.
"Anko, is that you over there causing another commotion?" A female voice called.
Jagaa's face actually brightened a bit at the familiar voice. "Oh, it's the princess." He raised his arm and waved at Kurenai, who had just managed to push her way through the crowd. "Hi Princess, did you miss me?"
Kurenai's red narrowed on the man on the floor. "Oh, it's you. I supposed I should have guessed." It was then she noticed the position Jagaa and Anko were in and her eye twitched visibly. "Don't you two think you could try to show at least a little shame?"
Jagaa's expression became confused and he turned back to Anko. "What is this 'Shame' she speaks of?"
"I'm not sure." Anko answered with her own confused expression, "Maybe it's some kind of food."
"Really?" Jagaa questioned unsurely, "If it is, it doesn't sound very appetizing."
Anko frowned, "That's true. It doesn't." The woman then brightened with excitement. "Maybe it's something sexual!"
Jagaa shook his head. "No way, you'd definitely know what it was if that was the case."
"Hmm, good point." Anko conceded.
Kurenai started rubbing her temples in irritation as the pair continued on there verbal journey to the mystery of what 'Shame' may be. She should have known this would happen. The two of them were so much alike it was scary.
"These two could be siblings with how alike they are." Kurenai said out loud, instantly catching the attention of Jagaa and Anko.
"Did you here that? She said we could be brother and sister." Anko said in excitement.
Jagaa frowned a little. "Hmm, but if that's true…wouldn't that mean what we did the other night was Incest?"
Anko looked down at him in realization. "Oh, you're right. That would be Incest wouldn't it?"
The two continued to stare at each other, and Kurenai felt a twinge of fear as she took the pair's personalities into account. 'Please don't say it! Please don't say it!'
Anko, it seems, didn't hear the mental plea. "…That's kind of hot."
"You think so to?"
Kurenai screamed.
X X X X X
"WRONG!" Naruto shouted at Konohamaru, who had just henged into a decidedly overweight brunette. "Make it slimmer, more sexy!"
"Got it, Boss!" The boy shouted and performed the Henge again, this time becoming almost bone thin. "How's this?"
"No, No, NO!" Naruto shouted, "That looks like she's Anorexic or something!" Scratching his head in frustration, Naruto reluctantly decided it was time to pull out his last resort. Taking a quick look around to make sure no one was watching Naruto reached into his Kunai pouch and pulled out a rolled up magazine. "Okay, I didn't really want it to come to this, but it's clear that this is going to require desperate measures." He told the boy who was looking at him in confusion. "I stole this from my friend Kiba a while back. It may be a bit extreme, but if you can't figure out what you need for a successful Oiroke no Jutsu from this, then there is nothing I can do for you." Naruto finished by holding the magazine out in front of him for the younger boy to take.
Eyes shining with excitement, Konohamaru eagerly snatched the magazine out the blonde's hand. Not even looking at the cover after he unrolled it, the boy opened it to somewhere around the middle and examine the contents.
Four seconds later, Naruto was privileged to seeing the grandson of the Sandaime Hokage do a wonderful impression of his grandfather as he was launched backwards by a violent nosebleed.
"I think he understands now." Naruto said out loud, walking over and picking up the blood soaked magazine by two fingers and grimacing, "So much for returning it to Kiba some day." Looking around, he saw a trash can about twenty meters away, and just beyond that, a vending machine. Smiling at his luck, Naruto headed towards them. "At least I can get something to drink while I wait for him to wake up."
X X X X X
Approximately five hours after the start of the race, Maito Gai arrived back at the starting point, doubled over and clutching his knees while panting heavily. Turing around so that he was facing the way he came, he raised his head with a victorious smile. "Ha…ha ha…I win…Jagaa-san." He stopped to pant heavily for bit more before forcing himself to stand upright, grinning proudly.
"Now I simply have to wait for my opponent's arrival."
X X X X X
"Yes, that's it! You finally got it!" Naruto cheered, jumping up and down in excitement. Konohamaru would have been doing the same, but he was still trying to catch his breath after the several hundred (or at least that's how many it seemed like to him) Henges he had just done.
"Congratulations, Konohamaru! You've managed to do the Oiroke no Jutsu!" Naruto exclaimed, patting the boy on the back before pointing to the vending machine, "Go get something to drink and take a break. Once you've rested a bit, we'll do a few more to make certain that you've got it down pat."
"Yes, Boss!" Konohamaru saluted before walking a little unsteadily to where Naruto had pointed.
Naruto frowned as he watched the boy go. He didn't remember being that tired when he had created the technique, and he was sure it had taken him longer to get it down than it had Konohamaru. With a shrug, Naruto decided that it must just be that his chakra reserves were better than the other boy's at that age.
"Huh, oh, Naruto, what are you doing here?" Naruto spun around at the appearance of the new voice to find Iruka standing about twenty meters away, the white bandages covering his wounds from the previous night showing clearly on his face.
"Iruka-sensei?" The blonde boy asked in surprise, "I thought you were in the hospital. Were you released already?"
Iruka shifted a bit guiltily on his feet. "Ah, well, sort of. They wanted me to stay another night just in case, but didn't feel it was really necessary, so…" The Chuunin left the sentence unfinished.
Naruto stared at the man in amazement, "You mean you actually snuck out?" Naruto suddenly felt extremely pleased that the man had done something that he would have done.
"Um, yeah." Iruka admitted shamefully. "Not setting a very good example as a teacher am I."
Naruto laughed in response. "Well, it's better than Nii-san. He actually helps people sneak out."
Iruka couldn't help but let out a small laugh of his own. Afterwards though, his face became concerned as he looked down at the boy. "Naruto, are you, well, feeling all right today. You know…after last night and all." Iruka had the urge to bight his own tongue off when he saw the cheerfulness fall away from the boy's face. He knew he should have just kept his mouth shut, but his worry for the young boy had overridden his ability to be more tactful. He was just about to apologize to the Genin, when Naruto surprised him by smiling gratefully.
"Thanks for worrying, Iruka-sensei, but I'm all right. I actually feel better than I have in a long time." At Iruka's somewhat skeptical look, Naruto elaborated. "I'm not saying that what Mizuki-se…what Mizuki did wasn't painful, but because of him, I finally learned why I've always been treated the way I have. Something I've wanted to know my entire life. I think, really needed that." Naruto raised his head and looked up through an opening in the trees. His smile softening as he remembered the words Jagaa had said to him, and how his brother had held him as he finally found release for his hidden pain, but most importantly of all, how Jagaa had called him 'Otouto' for the first time since they had met.
"Yeah, I think I needed everything that happened last night." He said, his voice barely carrying above the sound of the wind passing through the trees.
Iruka stared down at the boy with a hint of pride in his eyes. "You really are something, Naruto."
Naruto grinned foxily at him. "Of course, I'm the future Hokage after all." Both of them shared a laugh at the boy's declaration.
"Hey, Boss, I'm ready again!" Konohamaru's voice range out as the brown haired boy ran over to where Naruto and Iruka were standing.
Iruka did a small double when he saw who the new arrival was. "Excuse me, but aren't you the grandson of the Sandaime? What are you doing here?"
"Boss has been teaching me a super powerful new technique that can even take down my Grandpa!" Konohamaru explained enthusiastically, earning a confused frown from the Chuunin. "Boss?" Iruka questioned.
"That would be me." Naruto said proudly.
Iruka turned and looked at Naruto, a sense of foreboding settling in his stomach. "Naruto? You're teaching the Hokage's grandson a technique?" Naruto nodded vigorously and the feeling in Iruka's stomach amplified. "May I ask exactly what technique you're teaching him?"
Naruto and Konohamaru looked at Iruka for a moment, then at each other, and then back to Iruka, both wearing evil smiles.
Iruka wished he hadn't asked.
X X X X X
"You need to lighten up, Nai-chan." Anko egged Kurenai playfully as they walked down the dusty road a ways behind Jagaa and Kakashi as the four of them made their way to Hokage tower, "We were just joking." A wide grin split Anko's face. "Well, mostly."
Kurenai let out a frustrated sigh. "It's the 'We' part that is making this so hard to deal with. At least when it's just you, you have a little bit of restraint, but when you throw him," Kurenai practically spat the word, "into the mix, you get five times worse." As she finished, Kurenai glared at the current object of her ire, who was currently up ahead of them amusing himself by subtly trying to guide Kakashi into walking into a telephone pole while his nose was in his book.
"You know, Nai-chan, don't you think you might be being a little too hard on Jagaa-chan?" Anko asked in a surprisingly serious tone. "I would've thought, after seeing what happened last night, you might be willing to rethink your opinion of him."
"I remember quite clearly the events of last night, Anko." Kurenai responded coldly, "I remember him disrespecting, even threatening, the Hokage. I remember him threatening to kill a fellow Jounin as he drove the man to the floor with killing intent. But most importantly, I remember the cold blooded murder of a man who was already in custody and was too wounded to even defend himself. Exactly what, out of all that, is supposed to improve my opinion of him?"
"Oh, I don't know." Anko answered back coolly, "How about the part where he let Naruto cry on his shoulder as he hugged the boy comfortingly, or when he admitted to the Hokage that he developed a jutsu for a dreamless sleep when he learned that Naruto suffered from nightmares, or when you ask yourself what you would have done to Mizuki if you were in Jagaa's place." The edge in Anko's voice when she said the final part made it very clear that if it what she would have done to Mizuki would have been far worse than what Jagaa had.
Kurenai looked into Anko's eyes for a moment, seeing the challenge reflected in them, before looking ahead again at the person they were talking about, seeing him snap his fingers in disappointment when Kakashi narrowly avoided the latest attempt at walking him into telephone pole.
It was hard for her to admit, but she understood what Anko was saying. She could remember the small amount of resentment shed felt towards the village leader when he had claimed to have done everything in his power to protect Naruto, and could even force herself to admit that she had found some satisfaction Jagaa shouted the claim down.
However, the fact that she had felt a slight thrill at the power he displayed by bringing the other Jounin to his knees, or that she had gotten butterflies in her stomach seeing the caring way Jagaa had comforted Naruto, she wouldn't admit to even under torture.
Still watching Jagaa as he tried to aim Kakashi for yet another telephone pole, the image of Jagaa and Naruto in that moonlit clearing entered her mind, and her eyes softened slightly. 'Maybe he really does have some good points.'
Suddenly, both Jagaa and Kakashi stopped dead in there tracks, Kakashi lowering his book to stare in disbelief at something further in front of them. Looking at each other in confusion, Kurenai and Anko made their way up to stand behind the pair. "What's up?" Anko asked, slapping Jagaa on the back.
"He's actually still there." Kakashi answered in Jagaa's stead. Looking past the two men, Anko and Kurenai saw a lone, all too recognizable figure standing in the middle of the road and looking the other way. "What's Gai doing here?" Anko asked.
"So how are you going to get out of this?" Kakashi asked Jagaa. "Once he finds out that you never actually ran the race, you'll never get rid of him."
Jagaa's answering smile was the same one he had worn before the start of the race, and Kakashi actually felt excited at seeing whatever Jagaa was planning. Anko and Kurenai just stared on in utter confusion as the four of them started moving towards Gai.
Gai was starting to get drowsy as he continued to watch the direction he was certain Jagaa would come from. It had been almost an hour now, and he was starting to wonder if maybe Jagaa had run afoul of something and was having trouble finishing the race. He would give the other man a few more minutes and go looking for him. After all, he couldn't let his newest rival be unable to finish their challenge.
"Oh, hey Gai, you finally showed up."
Gai's eyes widened at the voice of the very person he was waiting on and he whirled around to face the four people who had walked up behind him. "Jagaa-san? Why are you coming from that way? I've been awaiting your arrival patiently for some time now thinking you hadn't finished the race."
Jagaa frowned, confusion shining on his face. "What are you talking about? I finished before you did."
If Gai hadn't been so shocked by Jagaa's statement, he might have seen Kakashi almost drop his book along with Kurenai and Anko's mouths falling open.
"W-what? How is that possible?" Gai asked incredulously.
"You don't remember?" Jagaa asked, his frown still in place, "I passed you one hundred and thirteen times…or was it one hundred and fourteen…maybe one hundred and twelve…I don't know for sure. I started losing count somewhere in the nineties." Jagaa shrugged, "Anyway, after I was finished, Kakashi and I waited for you for about twenty minutes, but I got bored and decided to go look for Anko and Kakashi offered to take me to her usual hangout. Sorry for ditching you like that, but I'm not very good at waiting on people."
Gai felt like he was going to have a melt down. How could he have been passed so many times without realizing it? Was Jagaa really that fast? Maybe he had just been so absorbed in the race that he had not paid enough attention to his surroundings. Yes, that made sense. He had gotten so excited about having a willing opponent that he had failed to pay attention and didn't notice he was being passed, that had to be it. Nodding to himself at the explanation, Gai looked up and went straight into his 'Nice Guy' pose.
"Jagaa-san, it seems that today I have not only lost, but have discovered the dangers of letting my Flames of Youth burn to powerfully and make me unable to see what is happening around me! I thank you for this lesson and will resolve to correct this error, but first, I must honor our agreement and run another thousand laps around our fair village! I look forward to our next match!" Without waiting for an answer, Gai turned back around and dashed of screaming, "POWER OF YOOOUUUTTTHHH!"
Jagaa watched the man fade off into the distance with an astonished expression. "Holy shit, it actually worked! He's even more gullible than I thought! Hmm, to bad it probably won't work again though. Guess I'll have to think up something else next time." Turning back to the other three, he smiled impudently. "Shall we get going?" With a laugh at their shocked expressions, Jagaa continued on his way down the road.
Kurenai, Anko, and Kakashi stared after him for a moment before looking at each other. Anko was the first to break out of her stupor by throwing on a huge grin and running after Jagaa, jumping on his back as soon as she reached him shouting, "Jagaa-chan!" in a sing song voice.
Kakashi to started following soon after, his visible eye shining with admiration. 'He's a god. A Gai manipulating GOD!'
Kurenai, however, was less than pleased at Jagaa's blatant lying and complete lack of guilt at doing so. In fact, it was taking everything she had not to go up and start berating him for it. The only thing stopping her was that she knew it would be completely futile due to the man's personality, and probably make her even more aggravated than she already was.
'I take it back. He has no good points what so ever.'
X X X X X
"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING BY TEACHING A YOUNG BOY LIKE KONOHAMARU A PERVERTED TECHNIQUE LIKE THAT!?" Iruka screamed, two pieces of white cloth that had been torn off his bandages shoved up his nostrils to stop the blood flow that had resulted from his being used as a test subject for Konohamaru's completed Oroike no Jutsu. In front of him, the two boys were kneeling on the ground and snickering despite the tongue lashing they were getting.
"Come on, Iruka-sensei, it's a great technique to use on perverts." Naruto defended before mumbling just loud enough for Konohamaru to hear, "Which you seem to be." The other boy erupted into a fresh fit of giggles.
"I don't want to hear you excuses!" Iruka barked, "The point is, that it is a ridiculous technique that you have no business teaching to anyone else, especially not the grandson of the Hokage!"
"I quite agree, Iruka. That boy has no business teaching the young master any of his unsightly habits." The new voice caused the three on the ground to look up into the trees where Ebisu stood looking down at them.
"Crap, it's the annoying guy." Konohamaru yelled, causing a vein to bulge on Ebisu's forehead.
"You see, that boy has already started to corrupt you." Ebisu stated arrogantly as he leapt from the trees and started towards them with his hand held out. "Nothing good will come from associating yourself with a person like him, Young Master. I insist you come with me before he taints you anymore than he already has."
"Now just a minute!" Iruka shouted defensively, "I may have issues with some of the things Naruto likes to do, but he's not some kind of 'Taint' like you're trying to make him out to be. He's a good, hardworking boy, and there is nothing wrong with him being around Konohamaru-san!"
Ebisu looked at Iruka coldly, "I believe you know quite well why I wouldn't want that, person, anywhere near the Young Master."
Iruka's eyes became dangerous. "You're walking a fine line, Ebisu."
"Oh, and what do you plan to do about it, Iruka?" Ebisu sneered.
"He won't have to do anything." Naruto growled, forming his hands into a cross shaped seal. "I'll take care of you myself. Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"
Iruka gaped in astonishment at the sight of no less than thirty more Naruto's appearing around him with puffs of smoke. "Naruto, you know the Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"
"Yeah, I learned it last night." Naruto said, never taking his eyes off Ebisu.
"YOU'RE INCREDIBLE, BOSS!" Konohamaru shouted in admiration.
"Hmph, Kage Bunshin eh." Ebisu arrogantly adjusted his glasses and walked into the middle of the crowd of Narutos. "I may not look it, but I am an elite teacher. You won't be able to beat me with just this."
Naruto smirked at the man, "We'll see about that. Let's see how you handle my newest super powerful technique." Every Naruto in the area put their hands into the 'Ram' seal and shouted in sync. "HENGE!"
Iruka's eyes widened in terror as Naruto and his clones were engulfed in smoke. 'No…he wouldn't…' The next second his worst fears were realized when the smoke cleared to reveal that everyone of them had performed the Oiroke no Jutsu.
"W-W-WHAT IS THIS!?" Ebisu screamed as all the female Naruto's converged on him, calling out "Ebisu-sama" in sexy voices and draping themselves all over his body. A torrent of blood erupted from the man's nose and he was sent rocketing through the air to land in a crumpled heap thirty meters away.
"Heh, feel the power of the Harem no Jutsu!" Naruto shouted victoriously after changing back to normal as he looked at Ebisu lying in a twitching heap.
"Boss, Boss, I think Iruka-sensei is dead!" Konohamaru's panicked shout reached him. Spinning around, Naruto saw the boy leaning over Iruka with tears in his eyes while the man himself lay on the ground bleeding excessively from his nose and looking extremely pale.
"GAH, I FORGOT IT WORKS ON HIM TO!" Naruto screamed in panic, dashing over and grabbing underneath Iruka's shoulders. "GRAB HIS LEGS! WE HAVE TO GET HIM TO THE HOSPITAL!"
"R-roger, Boss!" Konohamaru shouted, running around and placing himself in between the mans legs facing away from Naruto before reaching down and pulling Iruka's legs into his armpits. "I'm ready, Boss."
"Let's move! 1, 2, 1, 2, 1, 2…" With Naruto counting rhythm, the two of them dashed off for the hospital with the unconscious man held between them, leaving Ebisu forgotten and twitching on the forest floor.
X X X X X
"All right, I'm here ya old fart!" Jagaa yelled as he walked into the Hokage's office with Anko, Kurenai, and Kakashi following in behind him. Kurenai glared at Jagaa, but he either didn't notice, or didn't care. "By the way, have you managed to leave your seat yet?"
Sarutobi felt his annoyance rising. It had proven extremely difficult to release the hold the powerful glue had on his robe without damaging the fabric, requiring a great deal of careful chakra manipulation. It had taken so long that the old man had almost lost control of his bladder before finishing. Taking a few breaths, Sarutobi managed to smother the feeling with the anticipation of the pleasure he was about to get once he told Jagaa the news.
Deciding not to give Jagaa the satisfaction of knowing how much trouble he had caused, the old man greeted them as if he hadn't heard him. "Ah, it's good to see all of you here. Asuma and I have been waiting."
The bearded Jounin turned from the old Hokage and gave them all a two finger salute in greeting. "Yo, you all sure took your time." Catching sight of Anko, Asuma looked mildly surprised. "What are you doing here, Anko? I wasn't told you were coming."
"I just came to because Jagaa-chan was coming." Anko shrugged, "Besides, I didn't have anything better to do anyway."
"It's fine if she's here." The Hokage said before clearing his throat. "Now, I have called all of you here for a reason, and I believe some of you already know what that reason is." He looked meaningfully at Kakashi who nodded in response, but the others seemed confused.
"You told me you were giving me my first assignment tonight, right? So does it have something to do with that?" Jagaa asked.
Sarutobi nodded. "Indeed it does. Jagaa-san, Kurenai-san, would both of you please step forward." The two complied with confused and slightly apprehensive glances at each other.
"Kurenai-san, Jagaa-san, what I'm about to do is unprecedented, and will most likely have the council in an uproar, but I feel it is an idea that will be well worth the trouble that may come." The old man looked between the two a small smile forming at the confusion on their face. "I have taken many factors into account before making my decision, but ultimately, I felt this would be the best answer. Therefore, I am pleased to tell you that, starting tomorrow, the two of you will take on the joint responsibility of being a Jounin-sensei for a team of new Genin."
Sarutobi watched as the two Jounin stared at him, emotions playing out freely across their face. Their confusion had slowly begun turning into understanding, which then turned into shock, only to followed up by a growing horror. Sarutobi could admit that he felt a bit guilty that he had to involve Kurenai like this in his plan to get Jagaa into a teaching position, but as he watched Jagaa's mouth opening and closing like a landed fish, the guilt gave way to a pleasurable feeling of payback for everything Jagaa had put him through to date.
Seeing that both Kurenai and Jagaa were starting to regain their senses, Sarutobi (Along with Kakashi, Asuma, and Anko.) quickly covered his ears as the two let out a yell that could have startled people walking through the streets of Kiri.
"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!"
A/N: Yeah, it was kind of short, but it was mostly a filler chapter anyway. I promise that the next chapter will be longer though and even have a little bit of action in there somewhere. So until next time, Ja ne.
