Mulder woke to a warmth against his neck, feeling as if feathers were tickling his face. The noise that subconsciously woke him began to grow, a groan coming from beside him. He froze, taking a moment to remember where he was. Scully, everything around him smelled like Scully. He realized that she had cuddled into the crook of his neck at some point in the night, smiling as he glanced down to see a mess of red hair sprawled across his chest and shoulder. William's small whimpers were becoming full blown protests, causing her to groan again and bury her face into him further.

"I got him." He kissed the top of her head, moving out of their embrace to tend to the baby. A small whimper escaped her lips at the loss of contact and he nearly rolled his eyes, he could only tend to one of them at a time. A smile spread on his face, knowing she was completely comfortable in his arms.

"Good morning, sunshine." He teased as she finally made her way to the living room a good hour after William had been fed and changed. Her hair was disheveled, eyes still half-closed with slumber.

"Did you make coffee?" She asked with a yawn, a small pout on her lips as she couldn't smell anything freshly brewed.

"Not yet, but I can." He handed her the baby as she settled on the couch. A free hand came out to grasp onto his before he could get away. She yanked with little force, just enough to signal that she wanted him to come closer. Leaning forward as he leaned in, she placed a chaste kiss on his lips.

"Good morning." Her voice was still husky with sleep, her sleepy eyes had a gleam in them that he definitely could get used to. He smiled, another small kiss before retreating to make coffee.

"Do you want me to make something to eat, too?" He yelled from the kitchen.

"You're offering to cook?" He didn't have to turn to see the eyebrow raised in suspicion. The apprehension was on good authority, given the last time she went through his fridge, there wasn't much that could be considered appetizing.

"Just because I don't cook, doesn't mean I can't." He narrowed his eyes as he brought the coffee to her, making it just the way she liked it.

"Mulder, you keep unfolding like a flower." She teased, the cup coming to her lips to hide her smirk.

"I'll just have you know, I had every intention of cooking dinner last night. Someone had to go and end up in the hospital."

"Dinner? Have you actually been researching what it's like to be a kept man?" Her eyebrow rose higher, causing the mock glare to be shot in her direction.

"I can boil noodles with the best of them. Bachelor Life 101." He grinned triumphantly, ignoring her snickers as he made his way to the kitchen to see what he had to work with.

After cooking what he would deem an edible omelette and a cup of fruit, he returned to the living room. She thanked him with her eyes as she took a bite. There was something rather intriguing about this Mulder, she was excited to see more of what he had to offer.

"Hello?" She answered the phone as he handed it to her, taking the baby so she could eat. "Good morning, mom." Her eyes met his, several questions passing wordlessly between them. "I'm doing better, my headache is practically gone. Yes, I slept great." He saw the smirk reach her lips before she suppressed it behind her coffee mug. "No, I don't think that's a good idea."

Bill. No doubt her mother had mentioned something about Bill. There was an apologetic look in her eyes, but not enough to mask the raw anger that was still on the surface. "Yes, I'll let you know how I feel tomorrow, but I should be able to make it for dinner."

After she disconnected the call, he waited for her to bring up the conversation. He wouldn't ask if she wasn't going to offer. There was still a strong feeling that he was intruding on her life, like he wasn't as welcome as he thought. Bill made that quite clear yesterday, though he couldn't completely blame him. Everything about their situation looked bad if the details were missing, and she hadn't mentioned the specifics to anyone, not even her mother.

"We're still invited to dinner tomorrow, but I told her it would probably be best if they didn't stop by today." She explained slowly. "I don't know if that will keep Bill away, but I made it pretty obvious that he wasn't welcome back if he can't behave himself."

"I can leave, if you want to have time with your family."

She began to open her mouth, tell him that he was her family, too. They had so many things left unsaid between them, time lost that they needed to make up for. She didn't expect them to just pick up where they left off, she couldn't even tell where that was. The only time they had been together was following a near death situation, and she didn't know where that left them now. He had seemed more than interested last night, but the circumstances were similar.

"No, I want you here." He smiled sheepishly at her, nodding at her implication. If he were truly hopeful, she meant permanently.


They spent the day tidying up around her apartment, her making space for his things in her drawers. The action caused him to pause, asking her silently what this meant. She simply shrugged, walking away from the opened, half-empty drawer. The implication was clear, it was up to him to accept that final step.

"Lunch?" He asked as he walked back from the kitchen, drying his hand with a towel after doing the dishes. She took in the scene, domesticated Mulder was rather a turn on. He knew her thoughts by the gleam of arousal in her eyes.

"I could eat." William babbled a response as well, sitting in her lap, happily playing with the toys scattered on the couch in front of them.

Before Mulder could respond, there was a knock at the door. Both of them looked at each other, wary of who their company may be. Scully knew that not even her mother could hold Bill back when he was in a rage. She could control him, sure, but only to an extent. She shrugged, nodding for him to open the door.

"Skinner." Mulder moved aside to allow him entry. Scully suddenly felt embarrassed, lounging around in sweats and one of Mulder's shirts while they cleaned. She excused herself to change while Mulder offered him something to drink. Skinner observed these two, shaking his head, both believing and disbelieving that his two menace agents were now shacked up, playing house.

"What can we do for you?" Mulder gestured for him to have a seat, taking his own on the couch as he scooped up William from the floor.

"I received a call today, for both of you, from someone who you've assisted on an x-file."

"They're requesting us?" Scully asked, presenting herself in jeans and a modest sweater.

"Yes, in a sense. They called the office number, but it was redirected to me since the unit is closed. He explained to me that there's been similar occurrences happening to him and his family. Do you both remember a Billy Miles?" Mulder and Scully both looked at each other, wide-eyed. A slight nod of their heads signaled for him to continue. "He's requesting that you two meet him in Bellefleur, Oregon again. I explained to him that neither of you work directly with the bureau anymore, but I would reach out and pass on the message."

"I see." Scully's voice was tight, Mulder could hear the worry in her words.

"I wanted to bring it to you personally, I'll leave you with his information. Please let me know if it's something you plan to investigate, I can arrange for it to be considered a consult." Mulder nodded, thanking him for the message. Skinner could feel the tense air, excusing himself back to work.

Mulder's head rested on the door after closing, a heavy sigh escaping his lips as his eyes closed. The fierce glare was being burned into his back, he could feel it without needing to turn. She was worried, scared. He didn't have a reassuring answer for her.

"Are you going to go?" Her words were sharp, holding the baby close to her as he tried to wiggle away.

"He requested both of us."

"Well I'm not going, so my question still stands."

"Scully, I can't just ignore this. We both know what we experienced in Oregon all those years ago. If it's happening again, it could mean that the answers are closer than ever."

"Right." She clipped, gathering William and making her way to the bedroom. He let out a frustrated groan, giving her a minute to collect her thoughts before making his way in there.

She didn't understand the importance that this could mean for him, for them. He may have put a hold on his quest, but that didn't stop his mind from asking the questions and seeking the truth.

William played happily on the large bed as she paced the floor. Skinner had no idea what he was doing, bringing this to them. They didn't even work for the bureau anymore, it should have been sent to someone else. She huffed, already know Mulder was most likely out in the living room, booking the first flight to Oregon. There was nothing she could say or do that would keep him here, she knew that. This moment's notice disappearance whenever he was on the trail of a lead was what she had feared. The answers about Samantha weren't out in Bellefleur, Oregon. They both knew that. Unless he planned to hitch a ride on a UFO, he wasn't going to fulfill his quest. She stopped, gripping onto her bed for support. She only hoped it never came to that.

The door opened slowly, he could see her sitting on the edge of the bed, staring at the wall. Her hands were intertwined, bound tightly together. William seemed oblivious to the tension around him, lying happily beside her.

"Scully."

"You're going." Her answer was low, in a voice that worried him. She didn't even need to glance his way to know the guilt that was already building in him. He let out a heavy sigh, running his hands through his hair.

"He requested me."

"That doesn't mean you have to go! You promised, Mulder. You are not obligated to the FBI anymore, that's not your job. Let someone else investigate it." She stood with the force of her words. Her anger masking her weariness and fatigue.

"Scully, you're not the least bit curious? You were there with me, you know what we experienced, what we saw. You know there's activity there, and it's happening again."

"I don't care!" She shouted at him, stepping back as he tried to reach out to her. William was startled by the outburst, a cry wailing from his tiny form. She picked him up, cradling him to her chest. "I just don't care anymore, Mulder. There's more important things to think about, and I've already had to make those sacrifices." She whispered as she buried her face into the baby's head and walked past him out to the living room.

It was a lot harder to avoid each other when he was in one room, and she was in the other. She could hear him shuffling around, no doubt packing his things. His words were mumbled, she couldn't make out who he was speaking to, and she didn't particularly care at the moment. Throwing items haphazardly into the diaper bag, she changed William, and rushed to beat him out the door. If he was going to walk away from them, she couldn't bear to watch.

She moved her car from her regular parking space, blending in on the street just far enough to be able to see his car. He came running from the building not 5 minutes after she left, his clothes disheveled, as if he were in the middle of changing. He wasn't even wearing socks on his bare feet. He glanced around frantically, the fear in his eyes, she could see that from where she parked. As soon as he noticed her car gone, his head dropped to be cradled in his hands. The tears falling from his eyes matched her own.

She made her way to her mother's house in a daze, knowing it would do more damage than good, but she needed somewhere to escape to. Her car sat idle in the driveway for a while before she gained the courage to face the wrath of her brother. It wasn't until William began to protest his restraints that she let out a heavy sigh. Not knowing Mulder's itinerary made it harder for her to go back to her apartment, so she waited out the day until she deemed it safe to return.

"Dana, I didn't know you were coming over today." Her mother welcomed her, a questioning tone to her greeting. "Is Fox with you?" Maggie looked past her daughter at the empty car.

Scully's eyes welled with unshed tears, her lower lip trembling. She handed William to her mother before bolting to the bathroom, ignoring the questioning look of Bill as he came down the stairs.

"What the hell did he do now?" He asked his mother through gritted teeth.

"It's not any of our business. I don't know what happened, but we are both going to be here to support her. Understood?" Maggie's voice was sharp, leaving no room for argument. Bill gave a short nod, the anger still raging in his eyes.

Scully slumped to the floor of her mother's bathroom, her knees pulled to her chest as she sobbed into her arms. She always knew there was a prospect of him leaving, of him not able to live this simple life, to sacrifice his entire quest for her, for their son. She wasn't asking him to walk away completely, she just didn't want to have that worry that one day he was going to chase the right light in the sky, and never return. She was always wary of letting him back into their lives, the thought that she could be so completely consumed by him caused the fear of losing him to rise. There was a deep love for him that she knew she could never replace, and she couldn't fathom him being gone on some lead for months at a time.

Whenever he found himself on these truth seeking expeditions, she worried from afar, not sure what her place was to feel this way for him. She could never ask him to choose, so she never did. He always made his way back, even if she had to go get him herself, and drag him home. This was different. He was like a caged animal, waiting to be let out. He had given up the x-files, but that didn't mean he would stop searching. If she allowed herself to ponder it, she didn't want him to completely give up everything that made him Mulder. She loved the way he questioned everything, believed on a simple faith that the answer was that of unexplained phenomena. She had hoped that William would inherit some of that childish charm that made him live life slightly less strict than her own. The only fear was that he wouldn't be as reckless.

"Dana, sweetie?" Her mother's voice was soft, comforting. It was the tone she reserved for when the kids were sick, or dealing with a tough time at school. She huffed a small chuckle that it still worked wonders on her.

"I'll be out in a minute." She splashed water on her face, wiping the tears from her cheeks.

"Would you like some tea?" Maggie was keeping herself busy in the kitchen as William played happily with a snack in his high chair. Scully kissed the baby's head as she took her seat next to him at the table.

"Sure."

"Do you want to talk about it?" Her mother asked, tenderly sitting across from her at the table, giving her the illusion of space.

"I don't know if there's anything to talk about." She let out a heavy sigh. It was the truth. She left without a word, and had no idea if Mulder was moping around her apartment still, or on a plane to Oregon.

"What happened?"

"We got into an argument about work. Skinner brought us the contact of someone we assisted on our very first case together. He requested our help again, but I didn't think it was our problem to solve. Neither of us work on the x-files anymore, and as of yesterday, Mulder doesn't even work for the bureau."

"But he left?"

"I don't know." An exasperated sigh escaped her lips. "I left while he was in the bedroom, I didn't even tell him that I was leaving. He could be on a plane, half way across the country by now."

"Or, he could be waiting for you to come back to your apartment." Maggie answered gently, hoping to reassure her stubborn daughter of the situation. There was a deep rooted fear that Mulder was indeed on a plane, but she had high hopes for him. She knew that his family was important to him, even if her daughter refused to acknowledge that in her moment of sorrow.

"I doubt it." She scoffed, shaking off the thought. Her heart clenched, the hope that he could indeed be waiting for them to come back, never leaving their side.

"Dana, you can't count him out for one bad decision. I hate to break it to you, but neither of you are perfect."

"I know, mom."

"His imperfections are what made you fall in love with him in the first place, you shouldn't forget that." Scully's head popped up, her eyes wide as if the thought never occurred to her. There was no way she was that transparent. "It's not like it was some secret. Honestly, you both have been denying your feelings for each other for years."

"I -"

"When you were missing, and then returned, the only reason he left your side, was to search for answers. He was out of his mind, needing to find the truth of what happened to you. If he could find them by sitting next to your hospital bed, I believe he would have never left."

Scully's eyes brimmed with tears again, nodding in remembrance of that time, as well as when she was in another hospital bed. Mulder was supposed to be dead, they had made the plan themselves, she helped him escape what he was being accused of just so he could find his answers. He came back, for her, risking everything to be by her side. There was a truth in her mother's words, and her memories, that she didn't want to see. A truth that she feared would shed light on the fact that she made the wrong decision walking away from him over a year ago.

"I need to go home." She stood abruptly, at a momentary loss of what to do.

"Dana, you're upset. You should at least relax for a bit, I was just about to get started on dinner." Maggie pleaded, seeing the worried look in her eyes. There was no doubt that her daughter was afraid that her walking away this time had done irreparable damage. Though there was a strong feeling that nothing could truly tear these two apart.

Scully agreed to stay for dinner, she needed to calm her nerves, her mind bouncing around sporadically. She knew she messed up this time, perhaps even more so than when she first left. It was what she did when things fell apart, she ran. She avoided the issue at hand, and she ran as far away from it as she could. It wasn't the healthiest way to deal with any situation, but she felt it worked for her, until she ran from Mulder. It nearly tore her heart to shreds, until she found out she was pregnant. After the shock wore off, she found joy in knowing that a part of him would always be with her. A larger need of wanting to share it with him consumed her mind for those long, lonely months.

His cell went straight to voicemail, her stomach clenching as she heard her own voice recording on her apartment phone. Where the hell was he?

"Skinner."

"Sir, it's Scully."

"Scully, were you calling for travel arrangements?"

"No -" Her brow furrowed. "Mulder hasn't called you, has he?"

"I haven't heard from him, that's why I assumed you were calling to accept the investigation. What's going on?" She let out a heavy sigh, her fear now amplified. What would Mulder do if he felt like he lost everything?

"I don't know. I assumed he was on his way to Oregon. I haven't spoken to him, and he's not answering any of his phones."

"Do you think he would have just gone on his own?"

"It's possible." She'd been ditched enough times to know. He might not want to make it an official investigation.

"Well I'll let you know if I hear from him."

"Thank you, Sir." She hung up, hanging her head. Where the hell are you, Mulder?

She ate dinner quickly, her brother shooting silent glares in her direction. Her mother kept the conversation light, though anyone could feel the tension in that room. Bill offered to drive her home, but she refused, just needing to be alone.

Mulder hadn't answered any of the times she called her apartment, his apartment, or his cell. She put in a quick call to someone she still spoke to at the bureau, asking them to check any flight manifests. His name hadn't appeared on any flights to Oregon.

She was exhausted by the time she walked into her apartment. She had driven by his, but there were no lights on to signal that he was there, not even the normal soft glow of the television. Not wanting to disturb the baby sleeping in the backseat, she chose against checking out the apartment for herself, finally making her way home.

Scully changed William, laying him down for the night. He was just as exhausted as she was, feeding off her emotional energy.

There was no chance of sleep that night, leaving her emotionally and physically exhausted the next morning. Her head was pounding, everything combined in the last few days coming to surface with a vengeance. She groaned, lifting William from his crib to satisfy his morning needs.

"Hello?" She answered her phone before the first ring ended, hopeful that it was Mulder.

"Dana, how are you feeling honey?"

"I'm fine, mom. We're just getting up."

"We?"

"Me and the baby." She sighed, knowing what her mother was asking. She had the same questions, but no answers to give. There was no idea where Mulder was.

"I was just calling to see if you still wanted to join us for dinner."

"I don't know, mom."

"Please, we were expecting you tonight. It'll be nice."

"Yeah, okay." She agreed, hoping to end the conversation. With a few more short answers, her mother finally let her go to sit in silence as the worry began to set in further.


After a day of finding activities to keep her mind busy, she finally made her way to her mother's house. Her and William had been for a walk to the park, had a picnic outside, enjoyed smiling at people who passed them by. She watched as her son was fascinated by the world around him, his head high in the clouds like his father.

"I'm so glad you decided to come." Her mother ushered her inside, already cooing at the baby before she could make it through the door. She heard voices in the other room, glancing over at her mother with a questioning look. "We have another visitor for the weekend." Her mother said mysteriously before grabbing William and disappearing in the kitchen.

"Mom, who -" She paused, seeing everyone gathered in the kitchen. Her eyes nearly popped out of her head as she flung herself into the man's arms.

"I've missed you." He whispered into her ear, hugging her tighter to him.

"My god, it's been way too long. What are you doing here?" Her smile was the brightest she remembered it being in a long while.

"I was told someone needed some cheering up. I also thought it was time to visit the family." He beamed back at her, pulling her in for another hug.

As kids, they were always the closest. Bill was older, doing his own thing, and Missy wouldn't give either of them the time of day. They both got into their own mischief tormenting the older siblings, only having to deal with the repercussions together when they received it in return. Charlie was her best friend, and she was the only one who he kept any kind of contact with in the family. He gave an occasional phone call to his mother, especially more so when their dad passed, but it was always Dana that he called with updates on life.

"I'm really glad you're here." Her eyes had a gleam in them, her closest confident back in her life, even if it was a short lived joy. The smile plastered on her face as she led him to the living room of her mother's house was what Mulder saw as he walked up the porch to the front door.

His heart sank at the scene, seeing her happier than he ever remembered. She truly was better off without him, that thought playing in his mind on repeat in the last 24 hours. As soon as she walked out of her apartment, it was like the sound of the door slamming was his heart shattering and his mind clicking into place. He couldn't lose them, he was being an idiot. He ran after her, taking the stairs in hopes to beat her to the ground floor. She must have nearly ran, because her car was gone before he could even make it outside.

He didn't know what to do, knowing she needed time, but not wanting to allow her enough to question every good thing that they had established in the past days that they'd been reacquainted with each other. He knew he needed answers of his own, but they weren't the ones he originally thought he was seeking.

Making his way to his apartment, he packed an overnight bag and made his way to visit his mother. He hadn't told her much about William, worried about who her contacts still were. She knew that whatever he needed to talk to her about was important by the tone in his voice, and the fact that he was planning a trip to visit with her.

When he arrived, she welcomed him with questioning eyes, too exhausted to revisit the demons of their past. He asked questions about Samantha, and she answered to the best of her ability. He didn't know who she was protecting, cancerman, his father, the entire syndicate, he didn't know. There were hidden secrets in her eyes, but he knew that even the answers she was giving were a lot for her, she was risking quite possibly everything.

"Why these questions, Fox? Has something happened?" She asked worriedly, remaining as stoic, yet gentle as possible.

"I need closure." He sighed, the tears stinging his eyes. "In order for me to move on, I need to know that what happened to her wasn't my fault. I need to know that I'm no threat to my own family. I have a family now, mom. I have a son. I need to be able to protect him with my entire self. I can't do that, constantly wondering what happened to Sam."

His mother was shocked by his words, now understanding the burdens that her son carried throughout his life. The burdens she allowed him to carry all these years. Her heart broke for him, in her eyes, he was suddenly a scared, 12-year-old boy who couldn't save his sister. She saw the broken child's soul still living within her grown son.

"Oh, Fox. I'm so sorry." She reached out to lay a tender hand on his cheek. "There was nothing you could have done. The fact that you were unharmed was a blessing in itself. I didn't know the entire plan, and I never forgave myself for what happened. She wasn't supposed to be gone forever." His mother broke down in his arms, both of their tears being shed in remembrance of what once was.

"I think we both need to forgive each other, forgive ourselves. I've found proof of the syndicate, I have enough answers to know that she's not coming back." He admitted in defeat.

They held each other for a long while, rebuilding what was broken. The next day, they both had the courage to go through some of Samantha's belongings gathered in his mother's attic. They reminisced, and mourned the sister, the daughter, that they had lost so long ago. He felt like the last missing piece inside of him had been filled. The rest of his soul was consumed by Scully, and now William.

He had taken a picture of Scully and William from one of the frames in her apartment, and snuck it into his wallet. She was beaming at the camera, holding William up by his hands as he balanced on his chubby feet. The candid moment made her even more beautiful than she was, and the joy on her face was a memory that frequented his dreams since he found it. He shared the photo with his mother, telling her more about his family and promising that he bring them to visit soon. That was, if he still had a family.

He realized that leaving before she got home wasn't the smartest move, but he was determined. He knew he couldn't face her until he was satisfied with himself inside. With everything hanging in the air, he could only pray for forgiveness to whatever god was out there.

His side trip ended, feeling as though he was driving back to his new journey in life, whatever it may be. There was going to be groveling and begging, he was prepared for that. Picking up her favorite flowers and chocolate on the way home wouldn't hurt. Mulder was prepared for any Scully that he may encounter. There was a generically pissed off Scully, which he was really hoping for, because that mood was easier to change with the begging and gifts. There was the ditched Scully, who he unfortunately dealt with one too many times. His own fault really. She usually needed a few days to cool off, but on day 4 at the latest, an innuendo could bring a slight smile to those plump lips. Then there was pursed lip, hands on hips, exasperated Scully. She usually came with "Mulder, what the hell were you thinking?" It was the closest to concerned doctor Scully, and a good mix of 'I'm going to kick your ass,' Agent Scully.

He felt pretty confident handling any one of those versions of her. What he didn't anticipate, was that she wouldn't care at all. The Scully he watched through her mother's front windows was beaming, a smile quite literally from ear to ear. He had been missing for a day, no contact, no known whereabouts other than his mother, and she didn't care. She laughed with her family, enjoying her life without arguments, or alien conspiracies. This was the life she wanted, the life he always feared he couldn't give her. But something inside him changed when he talked to his mother. He realized that he had been chasing lost family his entire life, needing to feel loved and forgiven for what he couldn't do. The fact that he had a family who loved him, accepted him for what he was, never was a clear picture in his mind. His answers were in front of him the entire time, in Scully, in their son. He wanted to give her the world, never have her question his loyalties or priorities again. He had proven too many times, to his own dismay, that she had every reason to doubt him. He wanted to change that, deciding that now, it might be too late. He turned, walking back to his car, and driving off to disappear into the night.

Scully heard the sound of tires pulling quickly from the driveway, her head quickly glancing towards the window. There was a large lump in her throat, hoping it was Mulder. She had put the Gunmen to monitor his credit cards. They hadn't heard from him either, promising to call as soon as they had any information on his location. She knew for sure that he wasn't in Oregon, making a call to Billy Miles, and confirming that he hadn't spoken to anyone since Skinner. She apologized for not being able to assist. No one had heard from him in over a day, the worry hoping to be masked by the enjoyment of family time.

"Dana, give me a hand in the kitchen. Refills?" Charlie asked his family. They heartily agreed, enjoying the quality time. "You going to tell me what's wrong, or do we have to play 20 questions like we used to as kids?" She huffed a small laugh, remembering how stubborn she was as a teenager. Charlie, being the dutiful younger sibling, was sometimes annoying by nature. He'd ask questions about what possibly could be wrong, before she would break down and finally tell him.

"I don't think I have the energy for a round of questions."

"Ah, getting soft in your old age, I could work with that." He teased, dodging a dish towel being thrown at him. "Come on, spill."

"I haven't heard from Mulder in over a day. No one knows where he is, and they haven't heard from him either. We had a huge fight yesterday, and I'm just worried he's out doing something reckless in retaliation."

"Do you really think he would risk that?"

"No, but as someone who's always lost everyone and everything he's ever loved, taking his child and walking away might do some triggering damage." She sighed heavily, fighting back the tears in her eyes.

"You honestly think that only William's absence would cause this distress?" She met Charlie's eyes, knowing what he was subtly asking. She knew how Mulder felt about her, though she always pushed him just far enough away to not have to deal with it. She was tired of fighting it, wanting to accept his love. That was what truly scared her, being consumed by him in every way possible. She couldn't lose him, she needed to find him.

"I have to go." She said suddenly. "I - I don't know where to start looking for him though."

"You haven't heard from him?"

"No, and I had some friends of ours tracking his moves, but he hasn't made any. Charlie, what if I made a mistake, what if he does something that I can't get him back from?" She asked worriedly, flashes of all the times she chased him to bring him home when he lost his way.

"What's taking so long?" Bill stomped into the kitchen, seeing the tears in his sister's eyes. He glared at Charlie. "What did you do?"

"He didn't do anything, we were just talking." She sniffled, turning her back to Bill. Charlie could immediately sense that she wasn't going to offer more about her worries to their older brother.

"We'll be back out in a minute." Charlie said, dismissing Bill. The older sibling grew angry with such a blatant dismissal, huffing back to the living room. "I take it big brother Bill hasn't been making this any easier."

"I'm sure he was thrilled to see me show up yesterday, in a sense, leaving Mulder." She scoffed, shaking her head.

"Well, the best thing about my big sister is that she's a bit of a rebel against our big brother." He bumped her arm, causing a smile to touch her lips. She hugged him, thanking him for coming back when she needed him most.

She put in another call to the Gunmen, as well to Skinner, hoping for any updates. Once they assured her that they would call her as soon as they had anything, she went to join dinner with her family. She was quiet, Charlie nudging her leg under the table to remind her to add a comment here and there. She was thankful for him, he always knew when to cover for her.

"I'm going to call it a night." Scully announced just after dishes were cleared.

"Oh honey, we haven't even had dessert yet." Maggie had a question in her eyes, but she already knew the answer.

"I know, I'm sorry. I will stop by tomorrow." Charlie hugged her as Maggie helped get William in his carseat. Bill frowned at her sudden departure.

"Why are you leaving? It's a weekend, you don't have anywhere to be tomorrow." Bill gruffed.

"I'm not feeling well." She left it at that, gathering William's things and collecting him from her mother. She hugged everyone goodbye, and left to sit in her car for a long minute of solitude.

She sighed as she rested her head against the steering wheel. Where the hell have you gone, Mulder?


She stopped by his apartment on her way home, actually going inside this time. It was empty, as she suspected. It seemed as if he hadn't been there in a few days, so she fed the fish, and plopped on the couch as she began to make a plan. She knew he wasn't in Oregon, but where else would he have gone? Wherever he was, he was untraceable. He simply didn't want to be found. With a heavy sigh, she gathered William and made her way home. She could think better there and do more research.

Scully nearly stumbled through her front door, the day taxing on her emotions and physical exhaustion. Her head was pounding, and she just wanted to curl up in bed and sleep her worries away. William babbled as she changed him and prepped him for bed. She only hoped this energy would fade fast.

They settled on the couch together, cuddling close as she worked on her laptop. He played happily, no signs of sleep in his near future. She let out a heavy sigh, giving into the inevitable of a longer evening. Not that she could even fathom a good night's sleep with Mulder's whereabouts still unknown.

The sound of someone outside her front door startled her, grabbing William close as it became nearer. She automatically reached for her gun, realizing she was in pajamas and her holster was in her bedroom. She carefully placed the baby in his crib in the room as she grabbed her gun, and positioned herself facing the front door. The knob turned and rattled as whoever it was tried to get in.

"Dammit." The voice mumbled, startling her as she dropped her weapon to her side. She'd know that voice anywhere.

"Mulder, what the hell." She threw the door open, seeing him standing there sheepishly. He glanced down and saw the gun in her hand, throwing his hands up in surrender.

"Scully, I'm sorry I was an idiot, but please don't shoot me, again." She huffed a disbelieving chuckle as she moved aside and allowed him entrance. She threw the safety back on her weapon, placing it on the table. She caught his eyes, questioning so many things. "I left my key in my bag, which is in the car. I'm apparently not as good as picking locks as I used to be."

"Mulder, where the hell have you been?" Her voice was quiet, filled with worry. He was confused, thinking she would be angry, or simply not care, as he assumed by the sights he saw earlier that day.

"I needed some answers, so I went to see my mom."

"I didn't even think of that." She scoffed, mumbling under her breath, feeling foolish.

"You've been looking for me?" Now he was desperately confused, wanting to check the back of her neck to make sure there wasn't a clone somewhere enjoying a family night filled with laughter and joy.

"Of course I have!" He sat as she began pacing the living room. "I called Skinner, and the Gunmen, and even Billy Miles. None of them had heard from you, so I had the guys watching your credit cards. You were untraceable, I couldn't find you." Exhaustedly, she broke down next to him on the couch, the day's events hitting her all at once.

"Scully -"

"I shouldn't have left. I'm sorry I walked out on you, I didn't know what to do. I was at such a loss, and this, whatever it is between us, it's still new. I'm adjusting, but I did what I always do, I ran when things got hard."

"I shouldn't have pushed you to run."

"Mulder, we are going to have arguments, we are going to disagree on many things, that's just who we are."

"But I don't want that to be who we are. Today, you looked so happy, I can never give that to you. Seeing you laughing with -"

"When did you see me?" She furrowed her brow, completely confused.

"Oh, I - uh, when I came back, I realized you weren't home, and figured you'd be at your mother's. When I drove over, you all were sitting in front of the big living room window, and you just looked so happy." He shrugged, looking down at his hands. She instantly could see the thoughts flying around in his head.

"Mulder, I was out of my mind, not knowing where you were. I tried to mask that with a smile for my family, but Charlie called me out not too long after. He knew that I was just putting on a show."

"I'm sorry I made you worry. I should have tried to reach you while I was gone, but I didn't know if you wanted to talk to me."

"Oh, Mulder." She rested her hand on his arm, turning towards him.

"I went to talk to my mom, to get some closure about Samantha. I know that my questioning mind may never stop, but knowing that it wasn't my fault helped fill a larger part of that void."

"I've always told you that."

"I know." He smiled at her. "And I appreciate it, but I needed to hear it from her. I needed her to tell me what she knew, and we were both able to close that part of our lives. No more conspiracies and questions lingering above us."

"I'm glad you were able to have that with your mother." She squeezed his arm, smiling at him.

"You had every right to be mad at me for wanting to leave. I shouldn't have jumped at the chance without thinking about you and William. I was a selfish ass, but I'm trying not to be." She chuckled, shaking her head.

"That enthusiasm is what made me -" She paused, realizing her next words. Was he ready to hear them? Suddenly, Charlie's voice filled her head, telling her to stop holding back from him. Telling her to allow herself to love and be loved by the man that consumed her soul. "It's what made me love you."

He leaned forward, engulfing her in an embrace and holding her as close as their bodies would allow. His lips captured hers, melding together in a smooth rhythm. Her arms reached up to wrap around his neck as he reclined himself on top of her. She could feel the bulge building in his jeans, pressing against her. She pulled back, running a gentle hand over his cheek.

"I love you, too. I don't know if I've said that." His voice filled her heart with joy.

"I know, Mulder. I've always known." She reached up to kiss him again, pulling his head back down towards her.

As they lay naked and entwined in her bed, her breasts against his bare chest, she ran lazy circles over his arm with her index finger.

"Mulder."

"Hmm?"

"Do you feel like you're sacrificing the greater truth, for us?" He let out a heavy sigh, there would always be her fear of resentment between them if he didn't clarify what this meant for them. What him being here with her and their son, instead of across the country in Oregon, meant.

"No. I think I searched for answers for my family for so long that I lost sight of the true search. That 12-year-old boy who was blamed and guilted and just wanted to be loved was the one looking for his sister that was lost to him. I'm not him anymore, because I have a family of my own, and I think that's the greater truth I should have realized was right there all along."

"Thank you." She reached up to kiss him again, before resting her face in the crook of his neck.

No more words were needed between them, they both knew what this meant for their family. He was here to stay, and though she had her doubts on if he could be satisfied in this life, she knew that he meant what he said. That he wanted to believe in them more than anything else in the world.