We walked down the road to Tom's house in silence. I didn't feel like talking. I never did anymore. I'm not me anymore. Just an empty shell. She completed me and not she left me, left me for a Footballer. How embarrassing! Ok so I'm not as fit as him, not as athletic as him, not built up like him, I don't dress as smart as him. I could have changed, I would have changed for her!

"Dougie, Dougie, Dougie!" I never realised that Tom was calling me.

"Huh?"

"You will be staying in the guest bedroom, is that ok?" Tom was also acting cautiously with me.

I nodded.

Tom walked me up to the guest bedroom. It had white wallpaper with small roses printed onto it. There was a single bed in the far left corner, a wardrobe in the far left with a chest of drawers next to it, a TV on the wall opposite my bed and a desk In front of it.

"It's not much but it's ok for now, we can go shopping for more furniture, one day if you want?"

"It's fine" I whispered. Tom nodded and looked around.

"we can redecorate, as well if you want. Isn't really your kind of thing is it?" He laughed and I laughed slightly.

I walked over to my bed and started to unpack my things into chest of drawers and into the wardrobe.

"hey, I have an idea, why don't we go shopping for posters?" I understand that he was trying to help but I really just want to be alone, but he seemed so into it and I know he means well. He did let me stay here after all.

I nodded.

"ok, meet me downstairs when your done" He smiled and went downstairs.

I stayed upstairs longer than necessary but Tom didn't seem to mind I got my wallet and went downstairs, he must have seen me put my wallet in my pocket.

"No, I'm paying today. My treat" Now I do feel bad, I'm just making things worse for everyone!

I'm a screw up in life, the once no one needs, the leftovers of perfect people.

We got into his car and he drove out of this drive.

"So, Dougs what posters do you want in your room?" He was trying to make me speak as much as possible.

"umm, I don't know, Blink 182" Tom smiled.

"should of guessed, really" I attempted a smile.

"Wanna eat out tonight?"

I shrugged.

We went round different shops to look for posters, I found a few Blink 182 ones and a really cool lizard one. I think Tom knew that I wanted to go home so he said we can order a pizza or something at his place. Once we got back to his place we went upstairs to put up my posters. It was pretty funny actually because Tom had to stand on my desk to put them where he wanted but he fell off and landed on his arse.

"It's not funny, it bloody hurts"

I kept on laughing, its been a while since I had a good laugh so Tom didn't mind. After we put up the posters Tom went out and got the pizza while I stayed in the house. I didn't feel like going out again but Tom didn't mind.

While I was waiting for him I stayed upstairs and played my bass. Tom's girlfriend Giovanna came in to check on me a few times. Bless her! She came in to listen to me, I think she feels that I can't be trusted on my own. True though, there probably wont be anything left in one piece.

That night I didn't sleep very well, I kept thinking about Frankie.

How long was so cheating on me?

Did the rest of The Saturday's know that she was?

Did the guys know?

What about Gio, Izzy and Georgia, Did they know?

These are the questions I think about every night, all night.