AN: Commercial break over, back to our story…I apologize for the long break, but school has been especially demanding as of late. I graduate next spring, so things have been getting intense as I line my ducks up. Here is a thank you to a certain reviewer who has been politely prodding me (with a fork) to finish what I've started. Come hell or high water, this story will make it to the end!

Chapter 7

"My, oh my, the legends didn't do you justice, my dear. I would have never guessed that the Balanced One would have skin like a magnolia blossom." Despite the fact that Joan should have been focusing on the way the man before her had complete mind control of all of the agents in the room, her brain flashed on the image of Colonel Sanders of Kentucky Fried Chicken fame, the biggest Southern gentleman stereotype in the world. When the henchman on the other side of the room gave a snort of laughter and tried to pass it off as a cough, she revised her assumption on who had the mind powers in the room. Though he could be gagging on the blossom line instead of reading my thoughts…If she hadn't been watching, Joan would have missed the henchman's slow wink. Before she could process what she had seen, Colonel Sanders managed to place her hand on his arm and in a gentlemanly fashion, began to lead her from the room.

"You'll make a lovely vessel, my dear, truly lovely."

Elsewhere…

"Damn, the flower petals are gone!" Liz and Abe screeched to a halt somewhere in the vicinity of the sacred items vaults. Indeed, the deep red petals they had been following had petered out and ended with an abandoned wicker basket of massive proportions.

"They must have run out of petals after that last wrong turn." The petal trail had twisted and turned down the corridors leading Abe and Liz to guess that either the bad guys enjoyed brisk exercise or they had forgotten how to read a map. A single thought whispered in the back of Liz's mind. It almost looked like someone was stalling for time…Abe was already reaching for the fallen basket when Liz placed her hand on his shoulder.

"You're not doing this alone." Abe did not smile, but his eyes warmed and he nodded as he grasped Liz's hand. Two minds reached into the object's recent history…When they resurfaced, Liz had a mixture of grim determination and anger in her expression. "Joan has been bait from the beginning. I'm going to burn every hair from that man's body, one follicle at a time." Abe managed to grin despite the troubling information they'd just extracted from the innocent looking basket.

"I'll douse him in rubbing alcohol afterwards for that extra special burning sensation, but for now, we've got to get ahead of these guys." Abe studied one of the vaulted doors for a moment. "If someone needed to, eh, deflower a virgin sacrifice in the flashiest way possible, where would one go?" Liz managed to not smile at Abe's choice of words.

"He needs it to happen soon, so he'll do it somewhere in the Bureau." Liz paced for a second. "What's the closest thing that we have to a temple around here?"

"What are some 'temple' traits? They're big, there's an altar, people go there regularly to worship, and power collects there." Their eyes locked as the same thought exploded in their minds.

"A gym..."

On the Flip Side…

Unsure of what kind of baddie this 'Lord and Master' was going to turn out to be, Hellboy decided to load the Samaritan with one of his Zen pizza (one-with-everything) bullets. There were enough bits of truly 'holy' things in these bullets that most lower-level demons turned into ash within minutes of being shot. Hellboy doubted that the Lord and Master would be a one shot kill, but stranger things had happened. Take Joan, for instance…he felt a small thrill at the phrase, 'take Joan.' When this situation was finally cleaned up, he was going to have to some serious thinking about his tactics to make Joan wake up to the chemistry that was growing between them. There were days when he felt like he could climb the walls from sheer frustration and then there were days when life was just…awesome. Yup, he and Joan were due for a talk when this was finally over and done with. Hellboy shook his head at his optimism. "Sure, just kick the power hungry bad guy's ass and then I'll suddenly have the right words to say to Joan." He shook his head and began to head for the likeliest place power hungry bad guys would head. A scream of pain-induced fear ripped the silence of the bunker's halls and Hellboy felt his guts tighten. Joan was still in the bunker..!

The Gymnasium…

Joan gripped her arm where Noah's cane had landed with vicious accuracy. She'd screamed more from the shock of being hit than from the damage the blow had brought. The bone wasn't broken, but from the feel of it, her arm was going to have one hell of a bruise. Dragging her mind back to the situation, Joan looked up at Noah, the so-called ascending seventh (or was it eighth?) god of Chaos.

"I'm sorry for the violence, my dear, but I couldn't let you get away with trying to take poor Lot's sidearm. Not that he, eh, I couldn't have stopped you with a thought, but I do so love the physical side of things. When you've brought me to my full godhood, my days will be so full with smiting and damning the light to hell, I won't have to time to savor the simple pleasures in life."

"Being a sadistic creep with a cane is one of life's simple pleasures?" Joan gave her best Hellboy shoulder roll. "Martha Stewart meets Marilyn Manson. Nice."

The smile that crossed Noah's face made Joan's innards turn to ice. When he stepped forward, she immediately backed up until gym's juice bar stopped her retreat. "Oh, you are about to find out just how nice I can be. Now do Noah a favor and hop up there on that 'altar'. Oh, and take your pants off before you do it."

AN: I know, I know. Long wait and then a short chapter equals bad karma for the author. I'm going to do my best to get this story finished before I graduate. Until next time!