Hale No, Hale Yes
Disclaimer: Twilight not mine. This story is. For longer disclaimer, see Chapter One.
AN: My special thanks to: kBlackNightingale, who knows that she has this every week to go through and fix all my mistakes. Yes, it seems I have a vendetta against the word 'been' this chapter. Thank you for doing this, even after a hard day at work.
vampireisthenewblack and rhenea5018 - You guys are awesome with your pre-reading and advice. Huggles to you.
And once again readers: I am humbled by your awesomeness. Thank you for the great reviews.
Chapter 7
I banged my head against my steering wheel. Talking with Jasper was doing my head in. We'd stopped. The making out. (Obviously.) But not before I'd had a pair of beautifully talented fingers doing their magic inside me and I'd come with abandon like some Barbara Cartland heroine around his fingers... And not before Jasper came all over my leg, moaning his desired lover's name...
Talk about awkward.
Clambering back into my seat was not nearly as smoothly done as when I had climbed over it to get to Jasper's lap. There had been a lot of head banging, awkward 'oh sorry' moments, and some very embarrassed glances. We then sat in awkward silence before finally we got around to discussing ... that. And even that conversation was, well, stilted. I can't put my finger on it exactly. Something changed between us. It was awkward, but a shared awkward. I daresay that our little moment of intimacy probably created a whole lot of distance that was never there to start with.
"Jasper...."
"Alice..." he singsonged. Why won't he be serious about this?
I glared. "Butthead."
"Beaver," he deadpanned.
Like a sucker fish, my mouth opened and shut a few times before I finally found some words. "You suck," I growled at him.
Grinning, he sat back, hands clasped behind his head. "For a woman who teaches English, your vocabulary is surprisingly small. I think I won that round."
I banged my head again - repeatedly. "Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid." Yep, my new mantra. Like it? I do.
"You might not like that little head of yours, but I do, and I think my sister certainly does."
I looked up to see Jasper's blue eyes staring down at me. Yeah, his eyes still had nothing on Rosalie's. Crap. I think Jasper was right. I need to just admit it. Especially when I came to the conclusion at the exact moment when he was about to shoot his load and I said no, and blue balls became imminent. It would be fair to actually come clean and just admit my feelings. Preferably not in the manner that Jasper announced his for Edward though, as that would be a little too caring-sharing and all that. Not my bag. Rosalie on the other hand...
"I have it bad for your sister, don't I?" I whispered. "Just as badly as you have it for Edward."
He smiled sheepishly at me, blushing and rubbing the back of his neck. Yeah, okay I thought he was still sort of cute. Oh come on, that bit of me hadn't been turned off overnight, just subdued a little... He bit his lip, sucking it in and letting it out slowly - not that I was really paying attention to it... I wasn't. Truly.
"Yeah, I think we established that earlier. But look, if it makes you feel any better, Rose feels the same way. About you. Edward - Edward is complicated. Alice... sorry, but never really been comfortable doing this. I mean, I expected - I mean, damn. Look, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have kissed you. Or..."
His fingers flicked my way. I blushed as I got his meaning. "No, no, it's okay." His brow rose enquiringly. I rushed to clarify, "Not in that way. Like it's a good thing we kissed... and the other stuff. Wait. I mean it was good that we learnt something from the... petting. God, I sound so old-fashioned. I mean who says petting nowadays? Fucking? No, so crass. I meant that it was good to work out that I wasn't just drunk off my tree and stuff. When I kissed Rosalie. Not this time. It's good. That we made out. Now. Because now we're not so confused. Right?"
"Right. Not quite according to plan... "
"Hey," I shrugged, "complications arose, ensued, were overcome. So it was a good thing we found out now."
His hand had risen to my face. "Yes, Alice it was a good thing." The backs of his fingers brushed my cheek, eyes roving over my face as if memorizing every inch of it. A little unnerving to be honest. "You're so tiny," he observed. I rolled my eyes. (Only worked that out now buster? I know - too snarky.) His tone casual, he remarked, "You're not the jock I expected Rosalie to fall for, you know."
I snorted and shook my head. Smiling gently at him, I asked somewhat teasingly, "And of course you know that sounds very stereotypical. Everyone likes jocks. I bet even you'd prefer them."
Those lips curved up into that familiar beautiful smile. God, what a shame it got weird!
"Not for the reasons you think. For that, I prefer them lithe."
"Like Edward."
"Like Edward. God, I know how to screw things up big time, don't I?" Amused, I looked at him. We were in the same boat. Guilt is an emotion too good to not share, huh? Jasper and I had a ton of it, it seemed. "Alice, Rosie's my kid sister. I just want to watch out for her. To make sure that even if I can't guarantee that she will not get her heart broken, to at least be assured that anyone she dates tries extra hard not to break her heart. But this? She likes you. She really likes you. And I do this. To the both of them." He cradled his head in his hands. My hand reached out to grasp his arm consolingly. When he looked up, his gaze was somber and it seemed he was trying to convey something to me in the depths of those ocean blue eyes. "I've fucked it, us, them. The deepest circle of hell is reserved for betrayers and mutineers."
I gazed at him for moment, confused as all hell. "You want me to worry about my own fortune? What on earth are you going on about, Jasper?"
Quizzically, he looked at me, "You got that?"
"Of course I got that," I retorted. "Jack's the best character. Pirate. Will's a plank. Wannabe pirate. Ever notice how Will goes to save Elizabeth, but she always ends up saving him, and it's Jack who saves Elizabeth? He should have stuck to being a blacksmith. But I guess he had pirate's blood in him. But look what that got him in the end - ferrying bodies lost at sea. And who got the girl? I reckon Jack did." I was rambling I know, but all this? It was unnerving to say the least. Talking about Pirates was the most sane thing that has happened all day.
Jasper broke in, his voice soft, "Alice, don't hurt my sister."
I stopped my ramble. "Excuse me?"
"As her big brother..."
What fuckery is this? I gaped at him. "Are you kidding me? You're doing the whole big brother act now? Where the hell was big brother on Saturday night? And thirty minutes ago when your cock was inside..."
Interrupting, he groaned, "I know, I know. Fuck, I know! Shit, like I said, Saturday night was supposed to be about Rose and the whole blind date thing with you, but I was distracted by my date. On Saturday, not tonight. Well I got distracted by him tonight as well. Fuck!"
My mind was slowly piecing things together. "Edward? Edward was your date?" I took a deep breath. "I thought Saturday was an honest-to-goodness date. With me! That I was having dinner with you, Jasper."
The silence was overwhelming and I chanced a glance at him. In return, he gave me a troubled look.
"Oh wow. Oh God. Oh Alice. I'm so sorry." Jasper looked so uncomfortable. He ran a hand through his already tousled hair. "Fuck, when I mess up, I mess up good." Beseechingly, he spoke, "Look, I'm so, so sorry. I thought when you turned me down three times and I heard you hadn't dated the whole time you've been in Forks - wow. Yeah, I thought... I mean... Christ Almighty, Alice. I figured you played for the other side, you know. That's why I invited you. I got that feeling about you. I thought you and Rosalie would be.. you know... keen to hook up. I mean, I told her you were a, um, lesbian, and that's why she was so interested in you that night. I mean... wow, yeah I can't apologize enough. I am so sorry. Again, I'm sorry, Alice. Yeah."
The penny dropped. Rosalie. Set up.
Accusingly, I glared at him, "So you set me up with Rosalie? I thought you said you weren't gay?" I was outraged and I rant a lot when I get outraged. He set me up. Jasper set me up! (Yes, I am ignoring the past half hour of talking about the fact he was in fact gay or bi or whatever it was that he declared himself to be. It doesn't excuse the fact he set me up!) "You certainly didn't feel like you were gay in any way half an hour ago. In fact, you felt decidedly straight, although you favor to the left a bit." I sat back and crossed my arms, staring out the window. "And here I thought Edward was Rosalie's boyfriend or something."
"What? Hell no."
(I had to smile. When Jasper says Hell it sounds like Hale. Kind of cute.)
He laughed, "Rosalie wouldn't go within a foot of any guy. I told you - she's a lesbian."
"Yeah, but I thought that was some joke! Like," I shrugged helplessly, "like, when you say it's the blonde in her, or the geek in her, or something! Not that she is actually an actual lesbian!" The laughter that came from him made me feel like someone should stick a cone on my head and make me face a corner. "God, I can't believe I was so stupid!"
I cursed a few times, thinking the gods really did hate me right now. All the insecurities, all the thoughts and confused emotions that had been running rampant since the 'Bella Italia incident' all came flooding back to me. Dully, I stared out the window. Fuck, how dense was I?
"Hey." Jasper's voice was soft and his fingers brushed against my damp cheek. I wasn't even aware I had started to cry. "Don't beat yourself up. When a Hale guns for you, they almost always inevitably get what they want."
"But I'm not gay! I don't make out with girls!" I wailed. Why won't people believe me?
Jasper's mouth dropped open and he just stared at me. "Rose was your first?"
"Yes," I whispered. "My first ... something. I don't want to tempt fate by putting a label on her. But yes. I thought..." Deprecatingly, I laughed, but it came out sounding brittle and jaded. "Yeah, well, it's done now isn't it? I'm thinking shit, and wondering what the fuck, and I'm all screwed up now. I just made out with you when all that's been on my mind is your sister. I mean - fuck! It's your sister! Way to keep things in the family!" Frustrated, I banged my hands on the wheel. "I've had boyfriends! Now, when I'm supposed to be considering finding 'The One', I'm a fucking lesbian? How the fuck does that happen?" I searched his face, hoping for the answers to be written there.
Jasper's eyes were sympathetic. "It's hard when you first realize. Both Rosalie and Edward had a hard time. But realizing you're attracted to the same sex is always hard the first time. Attraction is fluid. You never know who you're going to be attracted to. Don't be so quick to label yourself."
"How did Edward - and Rosalie - know? How did you know?"
Jasper scoffed. "Edward? He's always known, deep down."
I snorted. Poor Bella. She'll be so disappointed. She really liked Edward. Damn, why are all the good ones gay? "He's gay?" I needed to make sure, for Bella's sake.
Jasper grinned, his mouth curving sexily. "Dancing around the friggin' maypole, yes," he confirmed.
"Wow." I breathed, "So did not expect that. Gay Edward huh?" He nodded. I nodded with him, mulling this over, but then realized - "You told Rosalie I was a lesbian?"
"Hey, look. It's an easy mistake to make. And hey, after you saying no just now, it looks like I might have been right anyway. Like I said, you never know who you will be attracted to. Don't put a label on it. You're not necessarily lesbian, or bi. Just be you. It'll work itself out naturally."
My face flamed, but I still told him, "I gave you all the right signals, Jasper. I looked interested. I flirted. I smiled coquettishly even, and let me tell you that's damn hard to do when you want to leap someone's bone so freaking much instead - " I slapped my hand over my mouth, my eyes wide.
Oh fuck me senseless, I did not just say that!
Jasper roared with laughter. "So not a lesbian then?"
Shaking my head, grinning back with my face still flushed, I dropped my hand from my mouth. "No, not a lesbian. That I know of. But I do know that I like your sister. I don't know what that makes me yet."
"I guess that's you and me both, kiddo." Jasper leaned back, eyes staring at the roof of my car. "God, what a mess I've made," he repeated as he reflected aloud. His hand ran through his hair again, and he looked the worse for wear.
We sat there, alone with our thoughts, (though how you can be alone with your thoughts when there is another person in the car, is another matter. Technically you're not, alone that is, but you are. Way too confusing to work it out right now.) Assessing Jasper, I could see he was stressed about his own situation. I guess, that would be difficult - having someone you have known for a while, declare their love for you when you aren't sure about whether your sexual preferences are one and the same. (And before you say it, Rosalie and I are not at all the same. Neither of us have declared any love. Just a little lust and it was just once. I will delude myself for a bit longer.)
Call it sixth sense or something, but I just knew that everything would be okay. Leaning closer to him, I patted his arm. "It's okay, Jasper. You won't hurt her."
Looking at me, he smiled. "She'll be angry that I made moves on her girl."
"'Her girl' wasn't entirely innocent in the matter. She'll be angry that I used you to banish thoughts of her."
Grinning, he joked, "You used me? Wow, that's just mean. I feel so cheap." He shook his head, staring down into his lap, a small grin on his face. He glanced back up at me, from beneath ridiculously long lashes. (Bastard. Do you know what I would do to get lashes like that?)
"Help me fix this, Alice?" His eyes had that puppy dog look at them and I caved in almost immediately. Man, I am such a sucker for puppy dog eyes - especially on really hot men. (Hey, I still find him attractive, just not as much as I find his sister.)
"Whatever you need, Jasper."
"Take me back to Forks, please? I think I need to fix something."
"Not to see Edward? You sure about this?" I asked, my hand on the key in the ignition.
"About as sure as you were when you stopped fucking my cock."
God, he's still sexy when he smirks like that. I took a deep breath, started the ignition and stated matter-of-factly as I eased back on the road, "So pretty sure then."
~tj~
Quotes:
Ch7
Complications arose, ensued, were overcome. ~ Captain Jack Sparrow, Pirates of the Caribbean, Dead Man's Chest
The deepest circle of hell is reserved for betrayers and mutineers. ~ Captain Jack Sparrow, Pirates of the Caribbean, Curse of the Black Pearl
It's okay, Jasper. You won't hurt her. ~ Alice, Twilight the movie.
AN: Thank you again for your wonderful support of this story. Unfortunately 'Hale No, Hale Yes' did not get to the voting round of the Giggle Snort Awards. But huge thank yous to those who voted! There are some mighty funny stories in the voting round so please read and support these fabulous authors. I think voting starts May 20. http: // gigglesnortawards. mmmboptastic. com/nominations. php
Until next week! :)
