Apprentice and Pregnant

Chapter 7: Ill Unknown

Hollypaw sat in the medicine cats den, getting very impatient. Beside her, Featherwing fussed over her belly, touching it with a sheathed paw over and over.

"I just don't understand," Featherwing said at last.

"Can't you just give me a leaf wrap so I can go?" Hollypaw begged, staring out the entrance and into the clearing. Outside, Grayclaw was waiting impatiently, pacing back and forth while Sweetcloud sat with Rainpaw. Hollypaw knew they were waiting for her to join the hunting patrol.

"They're waiting for me!" Hollypaw whined, wiggling around restlessly. Hollypaw knew she was being bratty, but she couldn't help it. Her paws itched to be outside in the forest, but Featherwing seemed to insist that she spend her whole day in the stifling medicine cats den.

"I'm sorry Hollypaw," Featherwing shook her head sadly. "I'm going to need to keep you in here for the rest of the day."

"What?" Hollypaw cried out in shock. "Why?"

"Your belly is bloated and very hard to the touch," Featherwing sighed, and Hollypaw knew she was frustrated. "I thought it might just be gas but it's not going away."

"Whatever," Hollypaw growled as she stomped away in search of an empty nest. Grayclaw will be so disappointed.

"I'll go tell your mentor you're not well," Featherwing said, trying to catch Hollypaws eye. Hollypaw turned her face away, too ashamed to even look at the she cat.

"Hey, Hollypaw!"

Hollypaw turned to look at the two queens who were taking up most of the space in the den. Both of them were heavily pregnant, their bellies sticking out far with unborn kits. Hollypaw felt herself wince. All those kittens, rustling around in a cats belly… tails and paws getting into an enormous jumble.

"There's an extra spot over here," Poppytail, the queen who spoke to Hollypaw, nodded with her head to a cramped nest in between herself and the other queen, Honeycomb. Hollypaw lowered her head and wedged herself into the nest, feeling very cross.

"What's wrong, Hollypaw?" Honeycomb asked. "You don't look ill."

"I'm fine," Hollypaw mumbled. "I just have some cramps and my belly is sore."

"That sounds like you when you first got pregnant," Honeycomb chuckled, looking over at Poppytail. "Remember how bad your cramps got? You could barely move!"

Hollypaw thought back to the way the cramps would slice through her, and wondered yet again what they were from.

"Yes, I'm sure glad that's over," Poppytail sighed. "I was afraid I'd have those cramps until these kits are born."

"You're not pregnant, are you Hollypaw?" Honeycomb teased, looking down at the apprentice affectionately. "Oh, of course you're not. Look at you, your body is so tiny a kit would tear it in half. And imagine if there was more than one!"

Hollypaw looked down at her belly, which stuck out awkwardly from the bloating. She was immediately self-conscious, and she shuffled around so her belly would rest under her. That was almost too painful to bear, and Hollypaw swore under her breath as she was forced to roll back over on her back. She could feel the queen's stares on her belly, and her face flushed hot.

A cat can't even gain the slightest bit of weight without everyone staring, Hollypaw thought to herself. I've probably just been careless with the amount of food I've been eating. I'll eat less and I'm sure it will go away.

"I think I just felt a little kick," Honeycomb whispered suddenly. Hollypaw looked at her swollen belly, trying to imagine how it felt to have a kit shuffling around in there.

"One day you'll have a belly full of kittens," Honeycomb said, noticing Hollypaws stare. "You're going to make a wonderful mother someday."

Hollypaw immediately recoiled, fear rolling off her pelt. Honeycomb looked taken aback at Hollypaws sudden hostility, and she looked at her with wide eyes.

"What?" she asked. "Why did you flinch like that?"

"I'm not ever going to have kittens," Hollypaw mumbled, thinking of sticky faces and shrill cries. "No way. I'm meant to be a warrior and nothing else."

"But what if you meet a special tom?" Poppytail broke in. "I'm sure you'll change your mind."

Hollypaw thought back to that wretched day when Longtail raped her and nearly threw up on the spot. If what he did to me is what it takes to have kits with someone, then no thanks! Hollypaw thought to herself, trying to force the hideous memory out of her mind. I'd rather starve if it means I'd never have to go through that again.

"I just felt another kick!" Honeycomb cried, tearing Hollypaw out of her thoughts. Poppytail purred and placed a delicate paw on her friend's belly.

"I think I felt it too," Poppytail whispered. Hollypaw rolled her eyes and stood up. This place is meant for queens and sick cats, she thought as she padded towards the exit of the den. I'm an apprentice. I have my whole life for this kind of nonsense. Hollypaw stifled a gasp as a cramp suddenly rattled through her ribs.


"Hollypaw, you've barely touched your dinner," Grayclaw commented disapprovingly. "Stop picking at that mouse and eat it."

"I'm not hungry," Hollypaw lied. She looked down at the mouse and tried her best not to drool. She was starving.

But I must lose this weight I've gained, Hollypaw thought to herself, trying to force the hunger out of her mind. She couldn't help sneaking a glace and Snowpaw and Rainpaw, who were devouring their fresh kill as if it were their last meal. Hollypaw didn't understand how they were so thin. I must get just as much exercise as them, if not more, Hollypaw thought, confused. Why am I getting so fat and they aren't?

"Eat the damn bird, Hollypaw," Grayclaw snapped. "I know you're doing this deliberately. I can hear your belly growling from here."

Hollypaw sighed and took a bite. It tasted so good Hollypaw rolled it around in her mouth before swallowing just to get as much of the flavor as possible.

"Take another bite," Grayclaw instructed, looking at Hollypaw coolly. Hollypaw was immediately self-conscious. She looked down at her belly, which was still bloated despite her lack of food. Hollypaw wrapped a paw around herself and wondered if he was trying to make her fatter.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Grayclaw snapped. Hollypaw lowered her head, realizing how ridiculous her thoughts were and felt ashamed.

"What?" Grayclaw asked, eyes softening as he realized she was upset. He leaned in closer and whispered in her ear. "What's going on with you?"

Hollypaw miserably shook her head, not wanting to talk about it. "I just think I've been eating too much," she confessed at last. "My stomach has been giving me problems for the past couple days."

"Starving yourself won't make you feel better," Grayclaw smiled a half smile, and gently nudged the mouse over to her. "Eating will help," he prompted. Hollypaw looked up at him, and her eyes caught his. His eyes were like blue magnets, and Hollypaw found that she couldn't look away. After several seconds he coughed awkwardly, and looked away.

"Finish your dinner," he said without look at her. He shoved the half eaten mouse in her direction and then walked away.

"Uh, bye?" Hollypaw called after him. Grayclaws head ducked down and he flicked his tail in an awkward goodbye.

"That was weird," Hollypaw mumbled, turning back at her friends. "He just walked away without even-" she broke off as she realized Snowpaw and Rainpaw were staring at her with silly expressions on their faces.

"What?" Hollypaw cried.

"He likes you," Rainpaw said after giving Snowpaw a knowing glance. Hollypaws face immediately burned with heat, as if she was standing too close to a fire. "He does not," she mumbled, picking an imaginary speck of dirt off her pelt. "Why would you even say that?"

"It's obvious," Snowpaw rolled her eyes. "I swear, everyone always knows when someone likes someone except the cat."

"He's my mentor," Hollypaw whispered, looking around to make sure no one was listening in. "And stop talking so loud. What if someone hears you?"

"No one's even close to us," Snowpaw smiled.

"Are you worried someone will hear that he likes you?" Rainpaw winked several times, making Hollypaw feel very awkward.

"You have no idea what you're talking about!" Hollypaw cried out, feeling annoyed and delighted at the same time. "You're making things up!"

"Am not," Snowpaw shook her head stubbornly.

"Yeah," Rainpaw agreed. "Like earlier today, he was so disappointed that you couldn't come hunting with us."

"Yeah, when Featherwing told him you were feeling ill, his face dropped so far I thought he was going lower his head and tuck his tail in," Snowpaw shrieked, enjoying the look of horror and shock that spread across Hollypaws face.

"You two are crazy," Hollypaw mumbled. But she couldn't ignore this new information. She glanced up and saw Grayclaw staring at her from across the clearing.

He smiled.

Hollypaw smiled back.