She had helped her mother sew for several nights in a row. John had scolded her for the first time ever the night before, and she had gone to bed very upset. Now she lay there staring at the ceiling, but didn't want to get up even though it was time. It was so pointless. He had scolded her because he thought it was more important to her to sew, than to be with her husband. He was so very mistaken! She would much rather be with him, but how could she? She could not bear it anymore. Two months had passed, and still nothing. Now she was alone again, John had gone to the workshop, but she could hardly stand up. She had pains, cramps gnawing in her abdomen, and when she got up the blood would come. Yet again. Maybe she should seek out the wise woman? She had completely dismissed the idea the first time it had occurred to her. She certainly didn't believe in magic, or whatever people would call it. But maybe it was still worth a try? She decided immediately not to say anything to John; he would just deem her crazy if he found out. She sat up and felt the warmth between her legs when blood flowed out. Well, like she had expected. She went downstairs and washed herself, and quickly got ready to go. She took no time to eat breakfast, waste of time she thought, and swung the little jacket over her shoulders.

She made her way through the city, everyone else was already well along in their daily doings, she was up later than usual. The weather was grey and the air was heavy with the rain that was coming. If only it would wait until she was home again. She went out of town, and followed a narrow path through a rocky landscape, up to the little cabin in the proximity of the forest, where the wise woman lived. She had always spoken of her as the wise woman, had never cared of someone calling her a witch, but who knew what the old woman was capable of?
She knocked gently on the door and heard someone rummaging around a bit in there, and then the door was opened by a huge black man who stared at her expectantly. She stared back at him confused for a moment before she cleared her throat.
"I've come to talk with the wise woman?" she said gently. He raised one eyebrow, but stepped aside to let her in the door. There was a horrible mess in there. Everything was as thrown into the room, and there was also a significant layer of dust. At first she could not see much, but her eyes quickly got used to the dim light, there were only a few candles lit in there.
"Welcome young woman, what is the reason you want to talk to me?" A voice asked in the corner, and Rubin saw the old woman, who was sitting in a deep chair and seemed to be drinking something from a teacup. Rubin glanced at the man, feeling a bit unsafe, but the old woman spoke again when she saw Rubin's insecurity.
"Do not worry about him, he is deaf. He protects me and helps me once in a while, in return I'm helping him to talk with his hands." she said. Rubin lifted her eyebrows confused, but pushed the thought away, she had more important things to talk about with this woman.
"I have come to ask you if there is anything I can do to ... To ... Well ..." she could not bring himself to say it, she felt so ashamed. The old woman looked at her with her head cocked.
"You're bleeding now, it's something to do with that?" she asked. Rubin looked surprised at her but nodded and sank a lump in her throat.
"What can help me ... become with child?" she asked, almost in a whisper. The old woman nodded with a little smile, it was as if she had figured out what Rubin would ask, even before she had come, and she wondered if she'd needed to say anything at all.
"First and foremost, my friend, you must now wait two weeks before you can conceive a child. And until then I have some tea that will be good for you. I must ask, has your husband some problems with his equipment?" she asked. Rubin looked uneasily at her, but shook her head, he had not, as far as she was aware. The old woman nodded quietly.
"You see, you can only conceive at exactly the right time! And problems can both be with your husband, or with you. Maybe both of you which will make it really difficult. But I will help you as best I can. Of course I'll need compensation." She said. Rubin nodded in agreement, but did not understand how there could be something wrong with John, she had always known that it was the woman's abdomen that conceived the child, how could there be something wrong with the man? The old woman rose to her feet with great trouble and walked over to a large cabinet that she opened, and Rubin saw that she used it as a drying cabinet for many bundles of herbs. She took some of them down, and cut some twigs off of them. She put it all into a small pouch, and handed it to Rubin.
"One cup in the morning and one in the evening. You can start drinking it as soon as you stop bleeding. And then you give this to your husband in his food." she explained and handed a strange little root to Rubin, that almost looked like a little twisted man. Rubin nodded again and took both the bag and the root.
"If you are not with child within the next month, come see me again and I will find something stronger for you." she said.
"What about payment?" Rubin asked. The old woman tilted her head slightly.
"Well, what can you give me in payment of what you want most of all?" she smiled and went back and forth. Rubin said nothing, she expected a huge amount which she would pay off the rest of his life, but it was worth it.
"You must bring me a child, a girl ..." she said finally. Rubin looked choked at the old woman, had she heard wrong? A girl? What did the old woman want with a child?
"Why?" she asked. The old woman smiled again and shrugged.
"I have my reasons, you have yours. Bring me what I ask for, otherwise my helping hand here will come and visit you!" said the woman, waving toward the man who stood at the door like a stone pillar, without knowing what they were talking about. Rubin backed away from the old woman, she did certainly not like the situation, it was the strangest payment she had ever heard of. The old woman stared at her, almost as if she was getting impatient.
"Listen, I'll give you an opportunity to be with child, the desire that has driven you up here to visit me. If you do not want it, give it back to me. This is the payment I want, and it cannot be changed. Decide!" she said.

Rubin clutched the little bag desperately; she did not know what to choose. A child was all she wanted; it was what she, and especially John, had dreamed of for so long. But a girl? How could she get hold of a little girl? And even worse, what would this old woman do with a small child? She shook her head in despair. Finally she sighed deeply and looked at the old woman's face.
"Very well," she said, and the old woman smiled satisfied and showed Rubin to the door.
"You have two moons to get me what I've asked for ... Come and visit me again if it does not work." said the old woman, with a surprisingly friendly expression on her face, and Rubin rushed out the door. She did not want to be in there for one moment longer

.
On the way home she encountered many children who played in the streets, and every time she was first filled with a shining hope that seemed like a light that warmed her from the inside, but then a blow in the chest when she saw a little girl running past. How should she go about this? Should she simply drag a child away under cover of darkness? or should she try to lure the girl? Could she maybe find an orphaned girl? She did not know, and tried not to think too hard about it, not yet. She started cleaning; it was the best way she knew to mute her thoughts. She would not go to her mother's this evening; she would wait at home for John, and try to convince him that she wanted to be with him.