Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. To my great, great sadness.

Additional author notes: So, I haven't watched a single episode from the seventh season, even Chosen, which is when this story takes place directly after. I've read stories, and Lilyme has given me more information as well… but I still don't know if this story could be in any way realistic. Feedback is welcome, good or bad.

Author notes: This is a series of short stories and scenes revolving around Faith and Buffy. Most have a Fuffy theme, but some are just showing them as friends/sister slayers. These are my imaginings of scenes that the show SHOULD have included between them. They take place in different seasons, and most could reasonably fit in at any time in the third or after the seventh, or just whenever you want to.

Story 5: On the bus

Buffy stared out the window of the bus, vaguely seeing the scenery they were passing outside of it, but not remembering any of it as soon as it had passed her by. She leaned her head and shoulder against the window as she turned her face towards it, expressionless. She felt numb, unwilling and unable to move, and the brightness of the sun outside seemed horribly inappropriate.

It should be raining.

They had been driving for some time now, how long, Buffy could not say. Ever since the destruction of Sunnydale, time seemed to hold no meaning for her. And now that the adrenaline and relief had mostly worn down, she was left with too many thoughts, only helped along by the bus's quiet.

Things had calmed down considerably inside the bus after a while; most of the Potentials who had been crying over their losses or chattering excitedly over their victory had settled down, and the entire bus seemed wrapped in near silence. At any other time the quiet among so many people, especially dozens of young female girls, would have seemed very strange, its presence loud and conspicuous. But now, after all that had happened, it felt right and natural, and Buffy was glad for it. Or rather, she had been, at first.

At first she had spent a good bit of her time looking around the bus somewhat anxiously at the others, making sure that everything was okay, that all was under as much control as possible. And it was… the Potentials were quiet, attending to each other, both injure and uninjured. Willow and Kennedy were leaned together with their arms around each other, faces solemn but composed. Dawn and Xander sat together as well, with Dawn pressing herself up against him, in a loving, little-sisterly hug, her cheek against his chest. Xander had his arm around her shoulders in a correspondingly big-brother fashion, and though there was pain and grief still present in his eye, he too was not crying or venting his emotions. Giles and Andrew were accounted for, as well as could be expected under the circumstances, and even Faith sat across the aisle from Robin, watching him closely as he slept. She occasionally checked his injuries and to be sure that he was, in fact, asleep, and not unconscious or worse.

Looking at Faith with Robin had made Buffy feel a strange contrasting mix of emotions. With all their past, all their issues with each other and the way they had both dealt with them before, Buffy wasn't sure that things between them would ever be the way they could have been at a point years ago, the way Faith had always wanted them to be. But she did know that after what they'd been through now, after fighting once again at Faith's side, she was at least more willing to try.

Who'd have thought they'd see Faith again, under circumstances where they weren't hunting her down to stop her from murdering someone? Who'd have thought that Buffy would ever be glad to see her face along with all the others' on the bus? Who'd have thought Buffy would once more think of her as part of the team, as one of them?

Well, she was now… she had definitely proven herself back there. She and Faith might still have a lot of things to work through, but trusting her was not one of them.

Two people, however, had been noticeably missing from her scanning. Anya had been killed in battle…and Spike…



Buffy pressed her forehead harder against the window's cool glass, blinking quickly. She had retreated to the back seat of the bus for this very reason, to be able to be as removed from the others as possible so she could be alone to think, to remember, even to cry if she needed or wanted to. But now that she had been sitting there for some time, she almost couldn't stand it, wanted to tear herself apart as something separate from her thoughts and feelings. They were just too much and too many to deal with.

She had told Spike that she loved him. She didn't know if that was true, as fully as he had wanted and needed… but she knew that it had at least been true in that moment. She knew that she was grieving for him now…

He had given his life for her, for her and for all the others. He had given up him immortality, and try as she might to stop herself from remembering the last look she'd ever seen on his face, she couldn't. A look of love, of peace, of determined resolve to do the right and noble thing… the look of a hero.

Buffy blinked harder, knowing she needed to cry, that she should cry, but finding herself fighting it, unwilling to let go. To give in and cry would be to admit to herself that it had all really happened, it was all really over, and right now to admit that would be more than she could handle.

Her skin buzzed suddenly, and she knew without looking up, without hearing the other slayer speak, that Faith had approached her. Slayer connections could be useful things.

"Hey, B," she said simply, her voice lower, raspier than usual.

Buffy turned her head slowly, looking somewhat dully at the other young woman. Faith was standing before her seat a bit awkwardly, one arm crossed over her stomach, holding onto the back of Buffy's seat with her other hand to balance herself against the bus's movement. She gave Buffy a small, almost nervous smile that Buffy tried to return but suspected hadn't quite made it to her lips.

"Hey," Buffy replied quietly.

Faith glanced down, then past Buffy out the window quickly, before returning her eyes to Buffy's. She shifted her weight, clearly uneasy, something that still struck Buffy as strange to witness in her. The old Faith had never been uncomfortable, or at least would never had admitted to it. It was hard for her to get used to this new, slightly softer and more mature Faith, even though she knew logically how Faith had changed.

"B?" Faith said suddenly, her voice abrupt, but still quiet, hesitant. "You mind if I sit with you?"

She kept her eyes fixed on Buffy's, and Buffy wondered briefly if she knew how much tension showed through in them. Faith obviously had a specific reason she wanted to sit with Buffy- she obviously had something she wanted to say, but dreaded doing so. She probably thought that Buffy would deny her quiet request, send her back to her original seat.

And as Buffy looked at her, she was about to do exactly that, to tell Faith that yes, she minded, that she wanted and needed to be alone. For any other person, she would have said yes…

But as her eyes held Faith's, she saw their ambivalence, their strange mixing of determination and strength along with a weary vulnerability. She felt herself wavering as well, her ready reply dwindling as she wondered just how long it had taken Faith to decide to come to her and ask her. Somehow she couldn't bring herself to send the other slayer back to her seat.

"No," she said quietly, lowering her eyes. "Go ahead, Faith."



Buffy was already sitting pressed up against the window, so there was no need to make room for her. Faith sat beside her slowly, leaving enough distance between them so that they were not touching as she glanced at Buffy.

"Thanks, B," she said in the same quiet, subdued, rather un-Faith-like tone. She paused, seeming from her expression as if she were about to say something, but instead just kept looking at Buffy, frowning slightly. Buffy knew then suddenly what it was Faith was approaching her to say… the question was whether someone had sent her, or she had come of her own accord.

She had to head her off- she didn't want to deal with questions and pep talks, especially from the not-so-skillful-at-subtlety Faith. She didn't want to talk or think about anything at all. It wasn't that she minded Faith's presence so much, or even if Faith talked to her… but if Faith said a word to her about…

She had to distract her, that was all there was to it.

"How's Robin, Faith?" she said quickly, already knowing the answer. If the principal wasn't doing okay, Faith wouldn't have left him to sit with Buffy. But it was something to say anyway, something to distract her with, possibly get her thinking and talking about something else.

"Hangin' in ," Faith replied, and there was a measure of relief in her tone. Maybe she didn't want to say what she'd come to say as much as Buffy didn't want to hear it- maybe she too was glad for a distraction, an excuse to talk about something else. "I think he'll be alright. He's sleeping right now, one of the girls is watching him for me."

"Yeah," Buffy replied, "that's good, Faith, that's great."

"Yeah," Faith repeated slowly, then looked over at Buffy with new resolve in her expression. "B-"

"You care about him, don't you, Faith?" Buffy interrupted quickly, but even though her intent was mostly to head Faith off again, her tone was gentle.

Surprised, Faith's eyes widened a little, and her features shifted involuntarily as she shrugged.

"Well, I don't know, you know me, B-"

"Don't give me that 'get some and get gone' crap, Faith," Buffy said quietly, looking the other woman in the eye. "I saw the way you looked when you knew he was alive, when you were taking care of him. It's a little more than that. I know you at least care about him a little."

"Well then why are you asking me, B?" Faith muttered, shifting herself in discomfort. "You just think it's funny to see me squirm? It ain't like that anyway, it's nothin' big. You have someone around a little while, you get used to them, is all."

She slid her gaze over to Buffy with a little grin, her dark eyes glimmering with faint impishness. "I got used to you, after all, so my guess is anyone else is nothin'."

Buffy found herself smiling back at her a little in spite of herself.

"Gee, I'm touched, Faith," she said sarcastically; if it had been years earlier, she would have given her a playful nudge that would have of course provoked a counter-nudge that would probably have felt more like a punch. But the two were older now, young women instead of the girls they had been, and they had had too many years pass, too much happening between them to so easily fall back into such simple affectionate behavior. It wasn't that either were so opposed to it- they 

just felt that in light of everything, they couldn't do so without it feeling fake, forced. At least, not today.

"Do you love him?" Buffy asked quietly, searching Faith's eyes. Faith looked away quickly, shifting in her seat once more; if Buffy hadn't known better, she would have sworn the other slayer was blushing.

"I thought you didn't think I could love anyone but myself?" Faith said with too-obviously-trying flippancy. "You changin' your mind about me, B?"

"Never," Buffy reassured her dryly, then more seriously, "I never thought that, Faith. I might have wanted to think that, but I never really did."

Faith shrugged, laughing a little and giving Buffy a slightly smirky smile.

"Coulda fooled me, B."

"No, I mean it," Buffy insisted. "And you never answered my question, Faith. Do you love him?"

Faith shrugged, smiling in a way that was clearly uncomfortable as she looked at Buffy, looked away, then looked back again.

"Damn, B, you really enjoy this, don't you?"

"No," Buffy said calmly, though she had to admit that it didn't suck to watch Faith get flustered for once. "I just am curious, Faith. I don't think I've ever heard you say you love anyone."



"Well, it's not like tons of people have been givin' me much reason to say it," she muttered. "And even if they had been, that ain't exactly what I do, go around sayin' it all the time."

She sighed, her shoulders dropping.

"I don't know, B. Really, I don't know. How does anyone ever know?"

"You'll know, Faith," Buffy said quietly. "Some part of you always does…"

Her voice trailed off, and she pressed her lips together tightly. Dammit, how did it always get back to this, back to-

"Faith?" she said hurriedly, almost nervously, trying now to head off her own thoughts rather than Faith's. "I'm glad he's going to be okay."

Oh no, oh shit… great job, Buffy, great way to steer the conversation, your thoughts, away… for all she could think of now was those who had not been okay. Spike, who had not been okay…

She dropped her eyes, pressing her lips together again as her shoulders tensed, drawing up rigidly. She could not look at Faith now, didn't dare speak to her… but she couldn't stop Faith from doing so.

She could feel Faith watching her, could feel her indecision… and then a warm hand was on her arm, sending a brief sparking up her chest.

"Buffy," Faith said slowly, the softness of her tone making her words huskier than normal. "I know you probably don't' wanna hear this, especially from me… but I'm, I'm sorry about Spike."

Here it was, she'd finally said it, Buffy had finally heard what she knew all along must be coming… now she could accept her words stiffly and send her back to her seat, back to Robin. The worst was over, she'd heard it, and she was still alive, still sitting there…

Buffy looked back at Faith, preparing herself to nod and thank her, to tell her to back off in as civilized yet pointed a manner as she could. But then her eyes met Faith's… and she saw in them an empathy, a strong understanding that Buffy was completely unaccustomed to seeing. Not only from Faith, but from anyone. Sympathy she was used to, sympathy she could deal with. She was sick to death of sympathy. But empathy… and empathy from Faith, of all people…

Several moments had passed before Buffy even realized she was crying; it took seeing her own tears drop into her lap to understand why her eyes felt so hot, why she was shaking, finding it hard to breathe. She could feel Faith's discomfort as she felt her tense. Even without looking she knew the other slayer would be grimacing, almost panicked at Buffy's reaction… and yet Faith kept her hand on Buffy's arm, not saying a word, just making her presence beside her known.

A few days ago, Buffy would have never allowed herself to cry in front of Faith… hell, a few hours ago. She would have been enraged by the thought of letting Faith see such weakness, giving her such satisfaction. But now that she couldn't stop it, couldn't help it, she didn't mind, it didn't seem to matter. And she knew somehow now that as much as Faith might hate it or be made to feel awkward by it, she understood and was not judging her.

Somehow Buffy found herself to be turning in towards Faith slowly, putting her head on her shoulder as she continued to cry in quiet, pained sobs that shook her small frame. It felt like a natural move somehow, like there was no other place for her to go. And sure enough, Buffy could feel Faith's strong arm, slowly, hesitantly wrapping around her, pulling her in closer to her.

As Faith leaned her head down to Buffy's, still not speaking, only holding her close, Buffy could hear her shuddery breaths, could feel them moving through Faith's 

body. And she knew that only a tremendous amount of effort kept the younger slayer from letting herself cry as well.