Disc: don't own Jonathan or Eddie

"Nygma, for the last time, shut up."

"Uh-uh! This is my favorite song!"

"Every song is your favorite song."

"Untrue!"

Jonathan Crane sighed and rubbed a hand over his eyes. They had been driving for at least two hours now since the 'ghost incident' which he'd been trying very hard to forget, but the Riddler seemed to have forgotten it a long time ago, as he'd been singing along to every song that came on the radio for the past hour and a half.

Right now, he was swaying back and forth and caterwauling along with "Surfin' USA".

Jonathan glared at him. "Nygma! Hands on the wheel!"

Eddie grinned, bobbing his head up and down. "Sorry! I just have to do the actions! Come on, you can be the backup singer!"

"No."

"Well, you had better get used to it. It's going to take us awhile to get to California."

Jonathan sat straight up. "What?"

"Didn't I tell you?" Eddie asked, "We're goin' to the coast!" Flipping through radio channels, he stopped on one that was playing the Beach Boys rendition of "California Girls". "See? Even the radio agrees."

Jonathan fought the impulse to slam his head against the side of the RV repeatedly. "I don't want to go to California…"

"Why not?" Eddie asked, turning onto the highway. A smaller car honked and Eddie slammed on the horn which made a pleasant, "Dee-deedle-deedle-dee-dee-doo" sound. "Hey, watch it, buddy! I'm driving here!" the Riddler snapped, then turned to Jonathan again. "Why don't you want to go? We'll go to some fun club and meet party girls, and go to the beach and meet surfer girls, and go to the shops and meet…shoppy girls…"

Jonathan rolled his eyes. "I don't want to 'meet girls' and trust me, Eddie, you do not want to see me in a swimsuit."

Eddie rolled his eyes. "How bad could it be? I'll buy you some spray tan. As a matter of fact…"-he reached over, rummaging around in the glove compartment and pulling out a bright orange bottle-"I have some right here! You can put it on next time we stop."

Jonathan shook his head. "No! I do not want spray tan, and I don't want to go to California! I want to be in my lab with my chemicals!"

Eddie shook his head right back at the Master of Fear. "Looks like someone's going through workaholic withdrawal…"

Jonathan scowled, slumping down in his seat.

This was going to be a long trip…

a/n: sorry for the shortness! I'm quite pressed for time…plus I wrote the next 'Jonathan Crane's Journal' today and another fanfic for a different site. More soon!