So I took a little longer with this than I had originally planned but I would rather work on it the extra couple of days to get it perfect.. So I hope you enjoy, LG x
Chapter 7
Ste's point of view
So I've done pretty well avoiding Brendan, three days of ignoring his calls and making excuses to Cheryl. He sent me a text to ask if everything was okay but I couldn't even answer him, not knowing what to say. I've just put my all into work, covering shifts and staying behind later than I normally would.
The worst part about the whole situation is not having anyone to turn to, the only people that I would trust enough to tell is Sinead and Tony but I know I can't for obvious reasons. The NDA for one and the thought of either of them judging me or worse trying to get involved to help me out. They would think that I'm acting out again after everything that happened with Kyle, not that I would blame them but I know that I've moved on from all of that, it's been two years and I'm over all that carry on.
I know I won't be able to avoid Brendan forever but I had hoped to get my head sorted before I had to see him again but the longer I wait the messier things get in my head. I know me freaking out has probably worried him, the tricky part is that I did want it, I wanted to go all the way with it but then what? I would still need to be around him and I'm not the type of person that can keep sex and feelings separate. Having a one night stand with some bloke I'm never going to see again is one thing but when I would need to pretend to be his boyfriend I know I wouldn't be able to push it too the side.
In the long run it would save us both hassle, he isn't the committed type and it would never work out. If he was the biggest arsehole about it would help but he isn't, at least not all the time anyway. At the same time I still hate myself for what I have done, I should've thought about it before I let it go so far or at least explained to Brendan instead of running out on him like that.
At the same time I still can't bring myself to regret what happened, part of me wishes I had just jumped into the deep end and worried about the consequences later but I can't do things like that anymore.
I decide that even though I can't properly tell anyone what's going on I can ask Sinead for advice in a round about way. That's how I find myself in the restaurant an hour before we open waiting on her. She looks flushed when she comes in as if she's been in a hurry,
"Is everything okay Ste?" She asks me as she slides into the booth across from me,
"Yeah it's just I need your advice on something." I say before carrying on, "I've kinda met someone."
She grins at me, "Oh my god! I should've known, you've been acting a bit different recently. Well come on what's he like? Do I know him?"
I can't help but roll my eyes at her excitement, "No you don't know him and it's more of a casual thing."
"What like friend with benefits?" She scowls before taking a sip of her tea.
"Well yeah summat like that." I tell her, "I mean more just the friends thing but the other night things were going further and I sorta freaked out."
"Freaked out as in..?" She questions,
"I ran out his apartment." I mutter while rubbing my hands over my face,
She looks a bit confused before she squeezes my hand and looks sympathetic, "I know it's hard for you to trust people but would it be worth the risk?"
"Not really no." I tell her before explaining, "He doesn't want nout like that, I don't even know if I do, I just don't want to need to be around him and go back to being friends after something like that happens."
"It's understandable and I know you well enough Ste, I don't think you would be able to do the no strings attached thing. Not on a regular basis." She smiles sadly at me, "It's a good thing though at least it saves you a lot of heartache."
"Yeah I suppose, tah for this." I tell her, "I'm sorry I'm so wrapped up in my own drama, I haven't asked how's everything with Freddie?"
She huffs, "I was glad for the distraction to be honest, still the same I'm trying the whole silent treatment to see when he'll come to me."
"Well it's his loss anyway." I wink before leaning over and giving her a peck on the cheek, "Right I suppose we better get set up then." I say while standing,
"I'll get the tables all sorted babe." She returns the peck on my cheek, "Your phones been going mental I can hear it vibrate, sort it out." With a pat on the back and a smile she's away getting set up.
I pull my phone out to have a look, a text from Tony saying he'll be in soon and a missed call from both Brendan and Cheryl, I decide to call Cheryl back and hopefully she'll pass the message on to Brendan.
It rings a few times before she picks up, "Oh Ste love I'm so glad you called back! We've been worried about you!"
"Sorry Cheryl, things have been a bit hectic the last few days, we've been short staffed at the restaurant." I tell her, all I can hope is that Brendan's decided to keep what happened between him and I.
"No worries babe I understand." She tells me, "It's just I was hoping you and Bren could go out for dinner tonight?"
Great, dinner alone that'll go down well I'm sure "Yeah that's fine, I'm doing a half shift so I get out at five. What time were ya thinking?"
"Maybe around half seven, eight? I've already sorted it with Brendan." She tells me, I don't know why the hell he would even agree to it with what happened the other night,
"Alright well I gotta go we're just about to open up, text me the details?" I say hoping to get off the phone as quick as I can,
"That won't be needed love, Brendan's going to pop in today to fill you in. He's been pretty eager to see you." I can hear the grin in her voice without even seeing her.
"Right no worries, bye Cheryl." I say, part of me feels bad for brushing her off she hasn't done anything wrong and has been nothing but nice to me since I've met her but it's been sprung on me that Brendan's coming and I know I need to prepare myself for it.
I help Sinead finish getting set up, "So did you get everything sorted?" She asks me,
"There weren't really much to sort but yeah I guess, tah" I shrug,
I take a look at the bookings and notice that it won't be too busy, enough to keep me going but sadly not enough that I'll be able to avoid Brendan when he comes.
Tony, Jason and Mark come in before a few customers start to arrive, while Sinead waits their tables I go through to the kitchen to make sure everything's set up before going behind the bar and helping Jason with the drink orders and helping Sinead take them to the tables then heading back to the kitchen to do my bit in there.
The best part about half owning the business is getting to do a bit of everything, chatting to customers, making the dishes, helping to serve drinks and taking orders. Improving the menu, we all do our bit but it's great because I never get bored doing the one job, I'm always chopping and changing. Before I know it its two o'clock already and thankfully Brendan still hasn't made an appearance,
I'm at the bar serving Cindy, she's a bit of a nippy sweety, sometimes she's chatty and you can have a right laugh with her and other times she looks like she would claw your eyeballs out for even looking her way, so when I see Brendan coming out of his car through the window all I can think is great because if there's anyone that I don't want to see me with him it's Cindy,
She sees him approaching before fluffing her hair and pouting while asking me, "Well how do I look?"
"Yeah alright I suppose." I tell her with a small smile on my face,
She scowls while shoving me, "A bit more enthusiasm would help Ste."
"I don't appreciate you manhandling my best chef Cindy." Tony remarks while coming through from the kitchen,
Brendan stops infront of me and I pretend it's the first I've noticed him, "Alright?"
I can tell by his face he isn't happy with me but Cindy interrupts, "Don't mind Ste he's lacking enthusiasm today." She says while pushing her chest out and fluttering her lashes, "Are you here alone?"
He looks a bit uncomfortable when he looks at her before he nods back at me, "Steven can I have a word?"
I nod while I keep myself busy, "Drink?"
"Whiskey will do." He answers and I get to it while grabbing myself a bottle of water and moving round the bar to find an empty booth,
We both sit down and I decide to break the silence, "Look about the other night.." And that's as far as I get not knowing where to go with it,
I can see Sinead eyeballing us while taking an order a few tables down,
"I'm sorry I shouldn't have ran out like that.. It's just well it's not really my thing." I tell him and the only reaction I get is a lift of an eyebrow, "I don't do the whole no strings attached thing I ain't any good with it and I don't want things getting more complicated."
He seems to be mulling it over in his head while he stretches himself out, still not saying a word.
"I know I shoulda said something instead of running out like that, I shouldn't have let it go so far."
He runs his finger over his tache bringing my attention to his lips, smirk in place as always, "I need to take some blame in this too I guess, I should've known better than to get involved in that way with ye." He eventually says, "I'm not used to men running away from me though, I'll give ye that. Definitely a first."
"Has nobody ever actually said no to you before?" I ask but he doesn't need to answer when I see the look on his face, "Unbelievable." I sigh while shaking my head.
"Steven.." He pauses, "I'm Brendan Brady, I have the world at my feet, I want something I get it no questions asked, that's how my world works."
"Yeah well I'm not from your world am I?" I shrug,
He cocks his head looking at me, "It's just the way I am." He gives me a small smile and part of me thinks I can see sadness in his eyes, "I thought I should come see ye before tonight, ye know clear the air since ye haven't been answering my calls."
"Sorry bout that." I tell him, "I just didn't really know what to say."
"It's fine." He sighs while draining the rest of his whiskey and shifting in his chair, he brings out his wallet and hands me over a twenty,
"What's that for?" I ask scrunching my face up,
"The drink" he says as if I've just asked the stupidest question,
"Don't be daft Brendan." I tell him while shaking my head, after all the things he's paid for the least I can do is give him a free drink.
He looks confused before changing the subject, "I'll pick ye up at half seven? I've already took your new suit to your flat."
"Alright but how did ya get in my house?" I ask frowning, I know none of my neighbours have any of my spares.
"I have my ways." He says while standing up,
I brush it off not even wanting to know properly, "So we're in agreement then?" I ask,
"Agreement with what?" He asks and it looks like I've thrown him a bit,
"That we'll keep things neutral?"
He smirks again, "Yeah course, I'll see ye tonight Steven. Dress to impress."
Before I even get the chance to reply he's already walking away and I'm filled with dread that now he's just more determined to get what he wants, he did just say he always gets his way and I honestly don't know if I'm going to be strong enough to fight what I want too. Maybe after I'm finished with the contract we could do it, in a way it would finalise everything and would be like a sort of goodbye present.
"What was that all about?" Sinead asks me with a suspicious look on her face.
"Nothing." I tell her knowing she doesn't believe me without even looking at her face, "I met his sister the other night again and we had a few drinks, he was just giving me her number."
I know it's a crappy excuse but I'm no good with thinking on my feet, "Alright then." She says smiling unconvinced.
I think about trying to convince her more but decide against it since that will probably make me look more suspicious. Instead I get back to work, the rest of my shift I'm in the kitchen so the rest of my day goes along quickly and I manage to get out just after five. When I get home I check my front door for signs of a break in but there's nothing out of place. Once I'm inside I have a look around checking all of the windows but they are all locked.
It makes me feel uneasy knowing he can come and go from my house whenever he pleases and I don't even have any idea how he could've gotten in, I keep in mind to get my locks changed as soon as. My uneasy feeling is intensified when I realised he's left the suit lying on my bed, knowing he's been in my room and could've looked through my things does nothing to rest my mind, even though I don't have anything worth looking for it still doesn't make me feel better.
I take a look at the suit he's got me, funnily enough it isn't a shade of blue like what he has normally picked for me, it's a dark, almost black grey with a grey and white diagonal striped tie. That throws me a bit, he's never got me a tie before so it makes me wonder exactly where it is we're going, instead of worrying about one of the many things going through my mind I busy myself getting ready having a long shower and letting the hot spray soothe me. After I'm out I get to work blow drying and styling my hair to the best I can before putting a bit of hairspray on for hold and getting dressed. Quickly I brush my teeth and put some aftershave on.
Still with twenty minutes to spare I channel surf for a while until there's a rapping knock at the door and I know it's him, when I open the door I try to hide how shell shocked I am, his hair messily styled as always, every inch of him screams power and respect. His suit it matching to mine only lighter and I'm guessing he's done a good job of making our outfits match without making us both look stupid.
"I'm surprised ya didn't just barge in." I hiss while closing the door behind me and locking up, not bothering to invite him in.
He doesn't even look one bit guilty as he shrugs like its no big deal I tut as he walks away before following behind him, "Nice to see ye too Steven." He quips back as he holds the door open for me.
I roll my eyes at his sarcasm and think about closing the door in his face just so he has to walk round the other side but instead I decide to play nice with him, "So where we goin tonight then?"
He looks thoughtful for a moment before asking, "Have ye ever been to a gala ball?"
"We aren't are we?" I ask hoping he's kidding,
"It's my companies biggest competition that are holding it to celebrate the company finalising their new deal." He grunts,
"Why would you go to your rivals party?" I ask while frowning,
"It's the way this business works, need to keep up appearances. If I had it my way I'd spend all my time locked in my penthouse with booze, food and men delivered to me daily." He mutters, I had known he wasn't exactly a social butterfly but I didn't realise how lonely of a person he was.
"Why would you bring me here then? They'll spot from a mile away that I don't belong there." I tell him truthfully, "I ain't even been to any of these things before."
"You'll do fine, I wouldn't have brought ye if I thought otherwise." He says while patting my arm the contact shocking me like it normally does, "Trust me."
I don't know why but there's something in his tone that makes me believe him, "So will your Cheryl be there then?"
"Yep, her and Nate." He tells me, "We'll all be sat beside each other don't worry, although I can't promise ye won't be bored out of your mind by the time the nights done. I'll need to be talking to a lot of people and you'll need to be seen beside me."
"Alright, I'm sure I can manage." I tell him,
"Most people won't talk to ye Steven, it'll be all business." He promises me and I'm glad that I won't have to make small talk with the type of people that will be here.
We pull up at the Hilton hotel the only reason I even know where I am is because Tony had took me to some museum not far from the place, I remember looking at the hotel in wonder. After spending seventeen years of my life in a small village other than the odd occasion I would joyride into the city but never travel too far, leaving the place had felt alien to me and I remember being amazed at near enough everything I passed.
"Steven." Brendan says while his hand passes over my face,
"Sorry, lost in my own thoughts." I mutter before moving to get out.
"Ye know they rented out the full hotel for this." He tells me as we make our way towards the entrance.
"Really?" I ask in wonder, "Must've cost them a fortune."
"Yeah well as I said in this business it's all about keeping up appearances." He murmurs and pulls me into his side, his hand pressed against the small of my back as we make our way through the lobby.
I try to keep the look off my face when I see the place, it's definitely the fanciest I've ever seen, even though I don't really have much experience with this sort of thing. As we make our way through the room I try not to make eye contact with anyone while also trying to seem confident in myself, a waiter comes over with a tray of champagne, Brendan grabs two glasses and passes one to me while I smile in thanks at the waiter.
"So does it live up to your expectations?" He asks and I frown in question, "Of a ball, what do ye think?"
"I didn't really know what to expect." I shrug, "It's busy though init?"
He smirks at me while nodding, "Let's go find our seats, Cheryl will probably already be there waiting."
I nod while he puts his arm around me again and directs me further into the room, he's stopped several times while we make our way there. The odd occasion someone will ask me a question bringing me into the conversation but Brendan always keeps it short.
Finally we eventually get to a area filled with tables, there's easily about three hundred places set out, we make our way around looking for Cheryl and Brendan taps my arm while nodding in the direction of where her and Nate are sat.
I freeze when I look behind them, I could never forget the smarmy smile and easy eyes that catch my attention. Sat just a few yards away from me is someone I would've been glad to never see again, Kyle McKenna.
I feel like my feet are melting to that spot on the floor as I grab Brendan and spin around so I'm facing in the opposite direction, "Brendan, I can't." I say with a shake of the head, he looks at me confused, "He knows me, there's no way to pull this off." I say nudging my head in his direction.
It's one thing being in the same room as him never mind sitting so close to him,
He looks thoughtful for a minute before answering, "Come with me, I'll get it sorted out."
I follow behind him aimlessly as he walks up to one of the waiters, he puts on the most charming expression I've ever seen as he smiles at the man, "I'm sorry to interrupt ye, I'm sure ye have loads of work to do but my partner here is quite claustrophobic." He says while wrapping his arm around me, "I was wondering if we could move to one of the tables nearer the edge?"
The waiter looks between the both of us, "How many are there in your party?" He asks,
"Four." Brendan tells him, "but the other two can stay at the table there in if needs be."
"Should be fine since your here early, what's your name?"He asks while smiling at us both,
"Brendan Brady." He tells him and the waiter nods, Brendan waits till nobody is in earshot before asking, "Ye are going to tell me what that was all about aren't ye?"
"He would've blown it if he saw us together." I tell him, in a way I'm telling the truth, yes he is my ex and it would be uncomfortable being near him but if I were with anyone else I would put up with it.
"That isn't the only reason is it?" He asks while looking intensely at me,
"Mostly it is yeah." I tell him, "We have a past together though and things tend to get ugly when we run into each other." I inwardly cringe at the last time we met each other.
Brendan doesn't push any further though thankfully and the waiter comes back and informs us that we're able to switch tables and that he'll let Cheryl and Nate know where they have been moved to.
We sit down at one of the round tables at the left side, it's a table of eight but we're the only ones at it so far and I pray that whoever we're sat beside isn't too snooty. Cheryl and Nate come over soon after and we all get a drink ordered.
"Well that was just downright embarrassing." Cheryl huffs while sitting beside me, "Hi love." She says while kissing me on the cheek.
"Sorry Chez, I forgot to tell ye that Steven's claustrophobic." Brendan explains and I shoot him a thankful smile but he looks too deep in thought to acknowledge it.
"Oh Ste! I'm sorry if I had known I would've requested a table like this to begin with."
"No worries Cheryl." I tell her almost feeling guilty for lying to her, but then again we can't really get into too much detail with Nate sitting there.
Cheryl, Nate and I all chat between ourselves while Brendan barley speaks a word just sits nursing his whiskey, I honestly want to know what's went on with him and Nate to make him act like this every time they're together. An older couple come to the table to sit and Cheryl talks away to them as if she's known them for years while Nate pulls out his phone and I take the opportunity to try get Brendan's attention.
When clearing my throat and tapping on the back of his chair doesn't work I nudge him with my foot under the table. Straight away his eyes zone on me, it makes me wonder if he was just blanking my last attempts at getting his attention.
"What's up with ya?" I ask quietly, making sure nobody else can hear,
"Nothin Steven." He says leaning closer to me, "I told ye, this stuff isn't really my thing."
"Well what is your thing? Other than the three things ya mentioned earlier?" I grin,
He looks torn for a minute before clearing his throat and answering, "I like anything that'll give me an adrenaline rush, skydiving, surfing, anything like that."
"I wouldn't take ya to be the outdoorsy type." I say scrunching up my face and taking a drink of my mojito,
"Well I read books." I can tell it spills from his lips without him meaning for it to happen,
"Yeah? What do ya read?" I ask him, honestly I just want to keep the conversation going and I can't help it that anything this man does interests me.
"Anything, autobiographies, the classics. Anything that's interesting really." He shrugs,
"Cool." I say and shrug right back at him as the waiter places another round of drinks down for us,
"Ye not into reading then?" He asks,
I'm shocked at first that he keeps the conversation going before I recover, "Nah not really my thing, I'm dyslexic so.. It takes a while for me to get through it all." I feel my cheeks heat up in embarrassment,
"Still doesn't mean ye shouldn't try it." He says while rubbing his finger along his tache, "Ye can get they audio books now."
I wonder how I had never actually thought of that myself, "Well what would ya recommend then?"
"There's too many to choose from." He looks thoughtful, "Try 'The Sea of Tranquility'
by Katja Millay, it's a bit intense but compared to the usual stuff I read it's not too bad."
I smile at him, even though it's something as little as telling me a book to read it's a big deal for me, "Thanks."
He frowns slightly, "Your welcome." He almost questions, "After you've done that one ye can let me know what ye think."
"Will do." I grin,
"So have ye got any.. Hobbies?" He asks,
"Ehh nah not really, not all of us are adrenaline junkies." I say lightheartedly, "Cooking is my thing, that's all I've ever done really."
"Nothing else?"
"We'll not for years anyway." I laugh slightly, "When I was younger my version of skydiving was joyriding."
"Don't say that too loud." He hisses while looking around but quickly smirks and let's out a gruff laugh letting me know he's kidding,
"Ere' I bet there's a nice Bentley or something about." I grin only half kidding,
He shakes his head while smiling, "Ye do realise I could just buy a Bentley?"
"Yeah well what's the fun in that?" I offer back,
"We'll see." He grins and now I'm not sure if he's the one that's only half kidding now,
We're pulled away from the conversation by Cheryl dragging our attention away from each other but that doesn't stop me from glancing over at him numerous times, only to find him already looking at me. He shoots a bashful smile in my direction before looking away again and I can't help but think that's there's more to Brendan than I first thought. Like layers more, than what I first thought and it just makes me want him more.. How the hell am I meant to keep this up?
So I'm hoping you all enjoy reading this as much as I did writing it, next update will be posted ASAP, btw if anyone is interested 'The Sea of Tranquility' is actually amazing and one of the most underrated books ever in my opinion so yeah you should read it..