An Ashley Greenwood Original Herbert The Hobbit!
*Disclaimer I do not own any of these Characters, locations, or products except for the orgasmic Herbert!*
" Every single day,
Things went that way,
Must be tough to get those sexts,
What could happen next…"
Chapter 7: Girl To Girl
"Droid," I sighed in the most thoughtful way possible.
Gandalf then jumped, "agh don't thy say that Herbert or else moi is going to shank thou in the butt." I nodded because I always respect my elders, and Gandalf is in fact old. Gandalf then looked me in the eyes and grabbed my chin and said intimately, " I love you like the son I've never had Herbert, and I would like to adopt you as my garandson."
I gasped I would love to have Gandalf as my grandpa!
Gandalf was staring me down, and reading my mind then he proclaimed, " Oh, I just read you're mind and you want me to be your grandpa!"
I smiled because he was right I did want Gandalf to be my grandpa!
Gandalf looked at me with a big decision in his eyes, " lets go to the city by here, I don't know what its called, but it has an adoption agency."
I gasped even louder this time, because Gandalf already is like a grandpa to me.
We then skipped to the city, so Gandalf could fill out the papers to be my grandpa, it's a long process so I brought a Fashion Magazine. As we stepped into the city I noticed that everyone was fashionable, so I knew there HAD to be some designer boutiques around here.
"Gandalf I'm so tired of this outfit, we have to go buy me a new one pretty please," I begged with my big chestnuts sticking out.
Gandalf rolled his eyes but he understood, he has always thought I had great style, and voted me most fashionable of the Shire about a year ago. We pretty soon came up to a store, when we got inside they had so many designer things. Gandalf was in awe, he probably has never bought a designer item before, "Come on silly Gandalf," I said in a girlish way. I went and picked out an outfit for myself and went into the dressing room to try it on, it was a baby blue V-neck t-shirt, with a brown short sleeved cardigen, baby blue skinny jeans, brown lace up oxfords, and a cute little necklace.
"What do you think," I said as I posed for Gandalf.
Gandalf looked sad, " well yes great I just, I don't know."
"Girl are you just hating because you aren't getting anything," I asked sounding as if I was a ghetto princess. Gandalf turned his head he so wanted to be fashionable, so I gave him permission to pick out an outfit. Gandalf came back to the dressing room in an instant and wanted to change with me.
"Okay now close your eyes Herbert," Gandalf said while giggling, I'm a good boy so I did what he said. Gandalf then giggled again, " Okay now open them," I opened my eyes and Gandalf was in just designer briefs!
"Ah," I shouted shockedly, Gandalf then told me he was just kidding and that he wanted me to close my eyes again. I can't believe it Gandalf so wants a piece of me, but he did look rather good, he had a six pack, slightly wrinkled, but still a six pack. Gandalf then uncovered my eyes, "Oh my god look at you Gandalf you're looking cute," I said all fabulous like. Gandalf was wearing a white laced cami, a unbuttoned pink and white gingham shirt, white capris, and white jeweled sandals. We both were admiring ourselves in the mirror, when suddenly a song about just wanting to have fun came on, "That's my favorite song ever," Gandalf said in a happy sort of way. Me and Gandalf danced in front of the mirror to the song, it was Gandalf's jam. After the song ended we left with our new outfits on, Gandalf looked so good a random guy whistled at him, "Take it off shawty!" Gandalf responded by twirling the gingham shirt on his finger.
We entered the adoption agency, "Hello there I'm Gandalf, and I'd like to register Herbert Dior Von Furstenburg as my grandson," Gandalf announced to the lady at the register. The lady then looked down at her computer and looked me up in the system, " Oh, Herbert it says you're parents are dead."
"AGH MY PARENTS," I yelled as I grabbed my head I was starting to have a flashback of my parents, then I fainted! Soon I woke up in a hospital, with Gandalf by my bedside, "You fainted Herbert, you have such a delicate body you know." I nodded weakly suddenly a bunch of doctors came in, "Oh Herbert you're awake we were worried sick about you," I smiled it warms my heart to know everyone was concerned over me.
"So, Gandalf did you get me registered as your grandson," I asked curiously as I sat up in a dignified way.
"Well you see that's the thing Herbert," The doctors started to say something, my chestnuts grew big.
A doctor then finished his sentence, " You see Gandalf is already your grandpa." I gasped me and Gandalf are related, even though he totally has the hots for me?!
Stay Tuned for Chapter 8 of Herbert The Hobbit!