A/N
So, for those of you who had enough of Bella & Jacob, this chapter gets back to Bella & Edward.
I mention a lot of Yale stuff - it almost all really exists (or did exist). Like Toad's Place. .com/ and Mory's .org/wiki/Mory%27s (Mory's has its own website, but the wiki one is more useful for general info!)
Here's a picture of Bella's dorm, Durfee Hall: .
Here's a picture of Edward's College, Davenport: .edu/davenport/Davenport_College_Upper_
As always - please review - it is a huge thrill to me that anyone reads this. If you like the pictures, tell me that, too, and I'll post links to more of them.
Thanks to flibbins for the awesome beta job! And thanks to my new bf, lexie2516, who generously volunteered to help with the Spanish. She gave me some awesome feedback on the conversation in this chapter. The translations are in the end note. Thanks!
Saying goodbye to Jacob on Sunday after brunch was awful. Rachel wanted to get back to Brown early so he had to be ready to go before noon. I walked him over to the gate and kissed him before he got into the car. "Call me later," I called as he and Rachel drove away. I walked back to my suite with my head straight down, staring at the flag stones, trying to keep the tears at bay. As soon as I got into my room, I pushed my door closed, flopped down on my bed and started to cry. Having a huge hangover didn't help my mood. I moped my way through the day, leaving my room only to do some laundry and then to eat dinner with Rose. Her hangover was even worse than mine, so she barely spoke during the meal, much to my relief.
The weather on Monday was a personal affront to my depressed mood. When I opened my eyes, I was greeted by beams of sunlight shining through my window. I walked outside to the perfect cool autumn air, which the bright sunshine promised to warm by at least 20 degrees as the day went on. By mid-afternoon students would be sprawled out all over campus on blankets and towels reading and doing homework, or just lounging and soaking up the beautiful weather. Even the scenery was in on the conspiracy; the leaves had started to turn beautiful shades of orange, yellow and red, and the stones in all the gothic style buildings glittered in the sun. I hated being depressed in good weather. It felt like the world was mocking me.
But since it was Monday, I had a lot to do to keep me busy. Spanish, Art History, and my English literature section all met on Mondays. I dragged myself around campus, looking at all the happy people and hating myself for not just enjoying this rare beautiful day. But that's one of the many problems with depression - it doesn't really care about the forecast.
After a strained lunch and painfully boring English section, I finally got a bit of news that perked me up a bit. Eric sent me an email asking me if I would be willing to add assistant stage manager to my duties for the show. I still had a lot of work to do to have all the props ready, and it would mean that I would have to attend every rehearsal, but I was flattered to be asked, so I accepted. And, of course, it did cross my mind that going to Davenport every night for the next three weeks gave me a few chances to see Edward.
I was still feeling pretty glum as walked over to Davenport, so I didn't have that stupid skip in my step from the previous week. I waited for a few seconds to get let into the college gate and walked through the massive archway to find D'Porters sitting all over their massive courtyard. Some people even seemed to have brought their dinner outside. Seriously, it's one nice day, people. Get a grip.
I walked on the path over to the entryway that led to the basement theater. As I got close, I saw that Edward was sitting on a blanket with some girl. Freakin' manwhore.
"Edward?" I said as I walked over to him. "You read?"
The girl on the blanket looked up at me and laughed.
"Nice. Glad to see that your sharp wit is still intact since last week," he said with a fake laugh. "I didn't get into this place on good looks. Well, not alone anyway," he said as he leaned over and elbowed the girl. She looked at him and smiled. I probably sneered.
"Bella, this is Bree – she lives across the hall. Bree, this is Bella. She's the – she's working on that play in the basement," he said, sounding a bit like he'd started to say something else, but cut himself off.
"Hi," I said with a shy smile. I had just been staring at her with bald hatred, so I felt a little guilty. She said "hi" back and returned to reading her book. Edward stood up and offered to let me into the entryway.
"So, what are you reading?" I asked as we walked the last few steps to the door.
"A play. You'd like it. Kind of a classic," he said as he held up the book, a beat up copy of Hamlet.
"Are you in the Shakespeare class?" I asked. "I heard that lecture is amazing."
"It is," he replied. "I've read Hamlet like a half a dozen times already, so I'm just skimming through it again before the section tomorrow. I need to sound good if I'm going to impress the super hot girl that Josh and I always sit near."
I rolled my eyes. "Edward, do ever think about anything but scamming on women?"
"Sure!" he said. "Sometimes I think about sports." And then he flashed me that ridiculous crooked smile and unlocked the door.
I laughed as I turned around and grabbed the door from him and headed down to the basement. He is funny. But I am so lucky that I have Jake! Imagine if I was trying to get Edward Cullen to go out with me. I would look like the world's biggest idiot. And I'd probably already be afraid to come into D'Port for fear of seeing him post-hook up.
The rest of the week continued in that pattern. Each night after dinner I would head over to Davenport and find Edward waiting for me somewhere near the entryway that led both to his room and the basement theater where I was working. We would chat for a few minutes, and then I would go to rehearsal, smiling from ear to ear. Eric must have thought that I loved the show.
On Thursday, I left rehearsal at 9pm, about an hour earlier than usual. The guys were intensely working on just one scene, so once I had the blocking recorded, it didn't matter if I was there or not. And I had a lot of work to do, so I headed back to Durfee.
Around 10pm, my cell phone rang. It was Edward.
"Hello?" I said with a bit of confusion. We had only really spoken on the phone once, the day we'd met.
"Hey, it's me, Edward," he replied. He sort of sounded . . . nervous?
"Yeah, I know. Caller ID. What's up?"
"Well, I went to look for you in my basement, but the guys there said you already left. So, I'm right outside your window now. Wanna look?" he replied.
"What? Why?" I asked as I got off my bed and walked to the window.
"Just look," he said, as I glanced up and down Elm Street.
"Um, sorry – I don't see you," I replied. "Are you on Elm Street?"
"Oh, shit, your window is on the other side. Dammit. OK, come look out a window toward the Old Campus quad."
I laughed as I walked into the common room and looked down at the sidewalk in front of Durfee. There was Edward with two giant coffee cups from Wawa's in one of those cardboard carrying things and a plastic bag under his arm.
"What are you doing? Earning a little extra cash as a Wawa delivery man?" I asked as I giggled.
"No, you fool. I brought this for you. It's a caffeine and sugar delivery to get you through your all-nighter. Now let me in," he said as he walked toward my entryway door.
"What all-nighter?" I said as I walked down the stairs to let him in. "I'm not pulling an all-nighter," I continued as I opened the door. I pressed end on the call. "Guess we can continue this conversation face to face," I said as I looked at him quizzically.
He smiled as he pushed his phone into his pocket and grabbed the entryway door. "Don't you have your first big Art History exam tomorrow?" he asked as I led him up the stairs back to my suite.
"Yeah," I replied, not seeing where he was going with this question. We walked into my common room and I turned to face him with a look of complete confusion on my face.
"So, aren't you going to have to study all night for it?" Edward asked.
"No, why would I? The material is pretty straight forward," I said. Then I started to get agitated. "But now you're making me nervous. Is there something about this exam that I should know? Is it not just on the stuff we've covered in the lecture and in the reading? Is there something else I should be studying?" I asked, my voice rising higher with each question.
"Oh, crap, now I've freaked you out. No, no, I'm sure it is just on what you did in class and whatever. I just assumed you'd be worried for your first big exam and pulling an all-nighter and I was coming to bring you supplies and make you feel better and now I've made you a million times more nervous," Edward said with despair as he pinched the bridge of his nose with his free hand and squeezed his eyes shut.
As soon as my heart stopped pounding, I felt terrible for him. "Oh, that is so sweet," I said. "Please don't feel bad. I'm sure that lots of freshmen are freaking out over this exam. I'm just unnaturally calm. I probably should be more worried," I said as I touched his arm, trying to make him feel better.
Edward opened his eyes and grimaced. "I came here to comfort you, and now you are comforting me! This is not going at all how I planned," he jokingly moaned.
I laughed. "You want to try again? Go back outside, stand by the right window. And leave the food at home. I really don't like to eat after dinner."
"Great. Perfect. I assume you don't drink coffee either?" he asked as he glanced at the two giant coffee cups in the holder.
"Not at night, sorry. I love it in the morning. Totally addicted, really. But at night, it makes it impossible for me to fall asleep. Which is what you were going for, so you were right on that point," I said with a smile.
"Yeah, sort of. Well, do you think any of your roommates would like coffee and some Entenmann's chocolate chip cookies?"
My smile froze. Fuck!!! Those are a really bad binge food for me. No, were. WERE a bad binge food. I glanced at the bag in alarm. "Reni, Charlotte? Kate? Mary? Any of you want some coffee and cookies?" I asked with forced nonchalance.
Edward looked at me in the same way he had in the restaurant, like he was trying to figure out something about me. Luckily, Charlotte interrupted the moment.
"Did you say cookies, Bella?" she asked as she walked out of her room. She looked at Edward and asked, "Hey, were you standing below my window?" When Edward grinned in embarrassment and shrugged his shoulders, Charlotte continued. "I thought you were some kind of creepy Wawa deliveryman!" She looked at the cookies and grinned. "But you brought snacks, so who cares!"
"Yup, chocolate chip cookies and coffee, up for grabs," I said stiffly as I practically shoved the box of cookies and the cup holder into Charlotte's hands. "Enjoy! And share with the rest of the suite," I added with a smile as she shrugged and then walked back to her room.
I turned back toward Edward. He looked positively dejected. "Hey, it's OK. It's the thought that counts, right?" I said with a forced grin. "Come on, come take a load off," I ordered as I walked toward my room and waved for him to follow. "You'll have to sit on the bed or the desk chair – there's not a lot of extra space in here," I explained as I led him into my bedroom.
He looked around at the poster on my wall and the framed pictures on my desk and shelves before he sat down on the chair. I flopped down on my bed.
"I cannot believe how royally I just fucked that whole thing up," Edward said in disgust. "I was sure you would be panicked about this test. And you have been at those rehearsals till at least 10pm every other night this week," he said as he raked his hand through his messy hair.
"OK, first of all, are you stalking me? How do you know when I leave?" I asked in mock indignation.
Edward gave me another little embarrassed smile. "Sometimes I look out the window when I hear the entryway door slam. I'm just curious who's coming and going."
"That's not the worst story I've ever heard," I said with a look of mild distrust. "That's intro stalking at best. You'll have to work on your skills if you want to be my stalker. I expect professionalism," I finished with a grin. He just frowned again.
"Anyway, I'll tell you why I'm not nervous, but you need to keep it a secret," I said with a little smile. "I don't want the extent of my geekiness so widely known," I added with a conspiratorial wink. I mugged glancing to each side as if I was looking for spies. "I studied a lot of this already, in high school," I said in a stage whisper.
"You learned this stuff in North?" he replied in surprise.
"A lot of it, yeah. I took these three AP classes – World History, Literature, and Art History – and they were all coordinated. It was called recurring themes. Of course, we all called it recurring nightmares," I said with a grin. "So, yeah, it's not my first time seeing most of the art we've covered. But don't tell anyone. I don't want to ruin my super cool reputation," I ended with maximum sarcasm.
Edward smiled. "I know what program you're talking about. My parents begged me to take the equivalent here last year – you know, Direct Studies. I 'politely' declined," he said as he made quote marks with his fingers. "One more disappointment for my father to add to the list," he added with a little grimace.
"Oh, you wouldn't have gotten in anyway, I'm sure," I said with a huge grin.
Finally, Edward laughed. "So, what were you planning on studying this evening?" he asked as he glanced at my desk. "I assume you weren't going to the weekly freshman Thursday night at Naples." He raised his eyebrows as he pointedly looked at my outfit.
Now it was my turn to be embarrassed. In all the excitement, I'd forgotten that I had already changed into some ratty pajama pants and a t-shirt with holes in it. I glanced down at myself and smiled. "Actually, I was planning to go out drinking like this. I'm making a statement about the misogynistic dictates of fashion."
Now Edward really laughed. "Seriously, what real work am I interrupting?"
"I was just going to work on my Spanish. I only placed out of one year, despite having taken Spanish since 7th grade. I kind of suck at languages. Really, I'm barely fluent in English."
"Well, you are in luck. "Hablo Español! ¿Qué quieres estudiar?"
I stared at him with my mouth hanging open. "In addition to the Japanese, you're fluent in Spanish?"
"Well, I'm not exactly fluent. But I'm probably fine for practicing conversation for your class," Edward answered as I continued to stare at him in awe. "Our babysitter was Guatemalan. And I worked for a landscaper for two summers," he offered as an explanation.
"Oh, this is amazing. I really am so terrible. And I've been going to the language lab and I feel like a complete moron, talking to myself with those headphones on. "¿Uh, usted puedo, um, practicar con mi?"
"You do need a lot of work! I think you just said 'You I can practice with me?' Nice."
"If you are going to make fun of me, you can leave now," I said with a pout, feeling a bit insulted.
"Oh, come on Bells. Take a joke," he said with a grin. "Did I not show up at your window, actually, uh, what's her name?" he asked as he hooked a thumb over his shoulder toward my door.
"Charlotte."
"Right. Anyway, I was at Charlotte's window, with snacks that you won't eat and coffee you won't drink for the all-nighter you're not pulling? You can't feel too embarrassed in front of me. Not tonight anyway."
I had to laugh. He was spot on. "OK, OK, you're right. I am not the one making the biggest fool of myself this evening," I said with a grin. "Here, this is the chapter we are working on," I said, holding out my textbook to Edward. "Travel words and the past tense."
"My favorite tense," he said with a grin as he glanced at the page.
"Alright, give me a minute to look this stuff over, then you can talk to me in Spanish and experience how bad I can be," I suggested.
"OK," he said as he tapped on the keyboard to wake up my laptop.
"What are you doing?" I asked.
"I wanted to see what playlist this is that you are listening to," he responded.
"Oh, it's just something that Jacob made for me," I said with a blush. Talking about Jacob – acknowledging that I had a boyfriend – seemed weird when I was with Edward.
"He's into classic rock," Edward said as Layla ended and Southern Cross started.
"All rock really. Classic, new, alternative," I answered.
"Are these his favorite songs or yours?" he asked, gesturing toward the computer.
"Some of each. Layla is my favorite song. I'm nuts about Clapton. But I'm not sure what his favorite song is. Or band. Maybe Fleetwood Mac?" I answered with a shrug.
"No one's favorite band is Fleetwood Mac," Edward answered.
I sat up straight on my bed and glared at him. "If you're just going to rag on Jake-"
Edward cut me off. "Chill. I'm joking."
I continued to glare at him. "What's your favorite band? Oh wait, I know, it must be the Jonas Brothers?"
"Hey, I'm not into the Jonas Brothers!" he said, faking deep insult. Edward laughed at me. "Man, you have a short fuse. I'll answer if you take that sneer off your face."
I leaned back against my wall and tried to arrange my face into a neutral look.
"You're really not much of an actress. Good thing you're not on stage in that show."
I flipped him the bird.
"OK, I'll tell you a secret, since you told me one before. I can play most of the Jonas Brothers' songs on the piano." When I scoffed at him, he continued. "Seriously, I can play almost anything on the piano. Even rock like your boyfriend likes. Classical, country, jazz. And of course, Miley Cyrus and Justin Timberlake," he said with his funny grin.
"Seriously?" I asked in disbelief.
"Seriously," he replied.
"Is that something I could see sometime?" I asked, and then hesitated when he got a funny look on his face. "I mean, hear?"
"Umm, maybe," he hedged. "It's just, I don't really play for anyone else, you know? It's really personal – I really just play for myself. A lot of the time I'm just making stuff up, tinkering, you know. So, um, I don't think I would be much fun to listen to."
"Oh, sure," I answered quietly as I glanced away. Too personal because he doesn't think of me like that.
I looked back at Edward and forced a smile back on my face. "So what's your favorite music to listen to?"
"Well that depends. The Stones, Tom Petty, The Eagles. Snow Patrol, Counting Crows, Blink 182. ABBA. Jay Z."
"I love Jay Z! And Kanye, as you know, and Eminen and Biggie. Snoop Dogg and Tupac. I could put some of that on instead," I suggested as A Whiter Shade of Pale started.
"Nah, this is fine," Edward replied. "I'll listen to Jacob's love tribute to you and I'll try not to gag," he said as he opened a window on my computer screen.
"Big of you," I said sarcastically. "Hey, what are you doing?"
"I'm adding myself to you AIM buddy list. Now you can IM me when you have a question about Spanish," he said with a smile as he turned back to me. "Are you ready for our chat?"
"I guess so," I said with obvious dread.
"Don't look so terrified Bella. I'll go easy on you, I promise," he said as he grabbed my textbook and scanned the page.
"¿Dónde estabas este fin de semana?"
"Yo . . . estaba aquí. Fui a Mory's."
"¿De verdad?"
I stared at him blankly for a second. "Huh?"
"De verdad. It means 'for real,'" he explained.
"Oh. Sí, fui con Rosalie y Kate y . . . Fuimos por la cumpleaños de Valerie. Teniamos mucho um, sonrisas."
"You had to a lot of smiles at Mory's?" Edward asked with a cocked eyebrow. "You mean you had a lot of laughs, 'nos reimos mucho' or you had a lot of fun, 'nos divertimos mucho'?"
"¡Los dos! Cuando Rose, uh . . . licked el . . . rim de la taza y . . . um . . . spun esto en su cabeza, um . . . pienso no, no, uh pensé! que yo . . . uh . . . era? Ugh! When Rose spun the cup on her head I thought I was going to pee in my pants!"
"Hey, that last part was not Spanish! The first part was barely Spanish! How are you going to learn if you quit so easily?" he teased.
"Yeah, whatever. This is definitely just a class to survive. Next time I have an oral exam I'll call you to practice, OK?" I said.
"Deal," Edward replied. "I'm excellent at all things oral," he added with a wicked grin.
"And that is our cue to end this evening's activities," I said with a smile as I hopped off my bed and stood by my door, waiting for him to get up.
"Alright, if you want to. And I thought we were just making some real progress . . . on your Spanish," he said as he stood up and followed me to entrance to the suite.
"Yeah, yeah. Go home Cookie Boy. I'll see you tomorrow. Well, not tomorrow. No rehearsals on Friday night. So, I'll see you . . . whenever," I said as I held the suite door open for him.
"Good night Bella. Good luck on the exam tomorrow. I'm sure you'll crush it," he said as he started down the steps.
"Thanks," I said sincerely. "Thanks again for the coffee and cookies."
"No problem. Anytime," he said with a barking little laugh. Then he gave me a little wave and walked out the entryway door.
I drifted back down the hall to my room thinking about Edward's visit. As I walked into my room, Charlotte poked her head out of her room and stopped me. "What was that all about?" she asked with flaming curiosity.
"Oh, just Edward messing with my head for a change," I replied.
"He must really be into you if he brought you all that stuff," Charlotte said with a bit of a jealousy. "Jay's never brought me a study care package," she sulked.
"Oh, come on Charlotte. That's because you are almost always at his place. He can't deliver coffee and cookies to you here if you are in his room, can he?" I asked with a grin. The last thing I wanted right now was to rehash Charlotte and Jay's relationship. "Plus, Edward is not interested in me like that. He was just being nice."
"Unlikely," she smiled. "No one brings gifts 'just to be nice.' He's into you Bella."
"No way. First of all, he knows about Jake. He freakin' drove me home from Brown a few weeks ago. I mean, we were listening to the playlist Jake made for me. And talking about it. And plus, he is totally a player, so not my type. He's just some sort of habitual flirt. He's so out of my league!" I ended in rush, sounding a bit more defensive than I had meant to.
Charlotte raised her eyebrows and held up her hands. "OK, Bells, whatever you say," she said with a grin as she turned back to her room. "But I bet he's got his tongue down your throat by the end of the week."
"Yeah, yeah, whatever," I said as I turned my back on her and walked into my room. Was she right? If he tried to make a move, what would I do?
………….
"Rose, are you ready yet? Friday night only has a few hours left in it," I yelled from the common room. Kate and I were killing time playing cards, waiting for Rose to make her final decision on her outfit for the evening. "It's just an Oktoberfest frat party at Toad's, you know," I muttered. Kate snickered. We'd been waiting for at least half an hour already.
"Yeah, whatever. What matters is if you're ready," Kate said to me.
"OK, OK" I replied as I touched my pile of cards.
"Go!" Kate yelled as she flipped her card and immediately slapped the jack she'd turned over. "And that means you drink again, Bella."
I took a swig of my favorite pre-party drink: Seagram's 7 mixed with powdered diet iced tea and a bit of water. It was surprisingly tasty. And pretty strong. Especially when Kate was crushing me in slap jacks.
"I'm almost ready," Rose called to us.
"That's the tenth time she said that, right?" I asked.
"Do you think it is only the tenth time?" Kate asked and I giggled.
"Rose, we have to get out of here now! Bella is already giggling. If we don't get to Toad's soon and get her moving, we are going to wind up with a liquid Swan before 9pm," Kate warned.
"Well, why didn't you tell me that things were getting out of hand out here?" Rose asked as she walked into the common room, looking absolutely stunning in tight jeans, heels and a sequined top. Kate and I just stared at her.
"Wow," I said. "This is just a frat party, right?" I asked, looking down at my jeans, tank top, unbuttoned plaid shirt and cowboy boots with chagrin.
"Yeah, just a regular party," Rose replied, a bit too calmly, while glancing toward the door.
"Wait a sec. Is someone going to be there?" Kate asked as we got up from the floor and grabbed our jackets, keys and IDs off the couch.
Rose blushed a bit, but just shrugged and mouthed "No comment."
"Oh, come on Rose. Tell us!" I begged. "Tell us! Tell us! Please, please, I won't say anything to anyone," I said in a louder and more slurry way than I intended.
"Excellent, Bells. You are drunk already. I just hope your favorite frat boy is there," Rose said with her most evil grin as we walked out of the suite and down the stairs. "I'm sure Edward will get a real kick out of Liquid Swan."
"First of all, he's not my favorite frat boy. I don't think he's even in a frat. And second, I'm not drunk, just a little buzzed. And third, Edward probably won't even be there, and fourth, I won't care either way, and fifth, screw you," I listed as I ticked off my points on my fingers.
Kate laughed as we crossed Elm Street. "I'm so glad it is loud in there so I won't have to listen to the two of you bicker."
We walked the next block quickly and got on line with about 50 other Yalies, all waiting to be carded and let into Toad's. Technically, you had to be 21 years old. In practice, we had never been denied entrance, but it still made me nervous. Luckily, when I was on line with Rose, no one even looked at our pathetic fake IDs; the bouncers just got one look at her and waved in everyone in her vicinity. I rode into Toad's on her draft almost every week.
Once inside, we checked our coats and began to search for our close group of girlfriends. It was dark by the large bar area in the front, but the huge dance floor was fairly well lit. And since we had arrived on the early side, so it was still easy to move around. Rose quickly spotted Valerie and led us out to the center of the dance floor.
With the buzz I already had going, I was even more enthusiastic about dancing than usual. I started moving immediately, laughing and smiling and singing along to all the songs. When a song we disliked came on, Kate and I started clowning around, doing the breast stroke and holding our noses like we were diving underwater. Kate was just whipping out her Saturday Night Fever move, in answer to my "Greased Lightening," when I stumbled backward and bumped hard into whoever was behind me.
I turned to say "Sorry" and found myself face to face with Edward.
The pissed off look immediately left his face and switched to a huge grin as I said "Oh!" and covered my mouth with my hand, my eyes bugging out of my head a little. Then I recovered and yelled "Edward" as I grabbed his hand and pulled him over to my group of girls to dance.
Edward joined right in, dancing along with all of us, smiling at all the girls, but never leaving my side. We danced to at least five songs before Edward leaned over and yelled into my ear, "Let's get a drink."
I smiled and mouthed OK and followed him off the dance floor toward the giant bar. It was a little bit easier to hear off the dance floor, so he leaned in and asked "What would you like?" in a slightly lower voice.
I hesitated. Usually, I only drank ice water at Toad's because the drinks were kind of expensive – that's why we pre-drank in the room. But I doubted that Edward was going to let me order just a glass of water without a lot of teasing, so I pondered my choices for a second. "A cosmo?" I replied, with a little shrug.
"Sure," he answered. "Sure you don't want the Oktoberfest beer?" he asked with a smile. "This stuff is great."
"Yeah, I'll stick to the pink girly drinks tonight, if that's OK" I replied.
I stood behind him while he ordered the drinks for us and, before I even had a chance to offer, paid for both. He turned and handed me my drink and raised his beer to toast, "To Oktoberfest," which I echoed and then took a sip of my cosmo. It was strong. I looked at him and then away, toward the floor, suddenly feeling nervous. And in my slightly inebriated state, being nervous meant extra talking.
"I didn't expect to see you here," I blurted.
"Why?" Edward asked as he casually leaned against the bar and took a big swallow of his beer.
"I guess because I never see you out at Yale. And because guys don't usually go to frat parties unless they are pledging or something. And I didn't know you like to dance," I finished, sounding drunk and stupid even to myself.
"Apparently you've given this a lot of thought," he replied with a huge grin.
"Oh, not really. I mean, just on the way here. Rose was giving me shit about you to try to get me and Kate off her back. We think she was expecting to see someone," I said with my eyes too wide, nodding my head.
Edward laughed at me. "How wasted are you?"
"I'm really not that drunk," I argued. "Well, maybe a little. How drunk are you?"
"Oh, I'm destroyed, as I thought you could have guessed from my dancing. I'm usually a little less clumsy," he said with his crooked grin. "Why are you so drunk this early in the evening?"
"I was losing at slap jacks to Kate," I admitted as he laughed. "Why are you so drunk?" I asked.
"Just a half century club with the some guys," he replied.
"A what?" I asked with a look of confusion, leaning in a little closer to hear him better.
"A half century club. You do a shot of beer every minute for 50 minutes. It doesn't sound like that much, but trust me, it adds up. It's about 5 beers in under an hour," Edward explained. "And this was just a warm up. No one puked tonight, which is incredible. I have a lot of faith that we will make it through the full century next month without anyone having to go to DUH," he finished, sounding alarmingly like a proud parent.
"Wow. You must be so proud. Don't kids grow up so fast?" I asked with a smirk.
Edward snickered and raised his beer to his lips to take the last swallow. "Do you want another?" he asked, gesturing toward my glass.
"No, I'm good. I think I'll try to finish this drink …" I started to answer, when a girl pushed past me and threw an arm around Edward.
"Hi, Eddie," she cooed, then planted a kiss on his cheek.
"Hey Nikki, what's up?" he yelled and gave her a hug. "Nikki, this is Bella," he said, pointing to me. Nikki briefly glanced at me, but before I could say hi, she had already returned her attention to Edward.
She started talking to him, but it was impossible for me to hear what she was saying over the music and the din of voices at the club. Edward smiled and laughed at whatever Nikki was telling him, while I stood awkwardly to the side, trying to figure out what to do. I glanced at the ground, then back to them, and then off to my side toward the dance floor. After what seemed like an eternity, I decided to head back to the dance floor. I took the last sip of my drink, and leaned toward the bar to put my empty glass down. Nikki was standing right next to Edward, so I put the glass on her other side and then sort of waved goodbye to Edward.
I walked back to the dance floor in a funk. I found Kate and Valerie dancing with a group of girls I sort of knew, and I half heartedly joined in with them.
"Where's Edward?" Kate asked.
I just shrugged and sort of pointed to the bar. "Where's Rose?"
"I think she found whoever she was hoping to see," Kate answered and pointed over my shoulder to a dark corner of Toad's. I couldn't really see anything, but I nodded and smiled.
"Who is it?"
"I don't know. She was here and then she was gone. She's faster than she looks," Kate yelled into my ear.
I just gave a small smile and went back to dancing. After a while, I glanced at my watch. It was only 11pm, but my enthusiasm for this party had totally disappeared.
As I moved to the beat of the pounding hip-hop music, my mind started to wander. I wonder if Edward and Nikki are still chatting at the bar, or has she already dragged him into a dark corner like the one Rose apparently is in with the mystery man. Maybe Nikki just moved closer to him where he stood. Oh, wait, that wasn't possible, unless she crawled into his lap. Ack!! Why am I thinking about this? I don't even care. It doesn't matter to me. He is just my friend, or acquaintance or whatever and he will never be more. I have no reason to care who he talks to or who hangs on him . . .
But even my surliest mood could only last for so long at Toad's. More of our girlfriends danced over to our group, and the music was great, and I had really started to perk up when I saw Rose coming back on to the dance floor followed by a guy I recognized. She smiled at me and Kate, but stopped a few feet from us and started dancing with the boy.
"Is that the one?" I mouthed at Kate.
She nodded quickly and purposely looked the other way so that Rose's guy wouldn't see us staring at them.
"Do you know his name?" I asked, but she shook her head.
Now I was completely consumed by stealing glances at Rose and the guy. He was cute and a decent dancer and he kept touching Rose on the arm in very affectionate way. Sometimes he leaned in and said something right into her ear. Rose had a huge grin on her face, so it had to be going well.
The next time I glanced at my watch it was almost 12am and I felt a lot better. I had shaken off the Edward induced malaise and I was having fun again. I noticed Rose and her guy slip off the dance floor and I was pretty sure that they were leaving Toad's altogether. I hope they go to his room. I really don't want to listen to their good time tonight. And with that thought, I was right back in my crummy mood. I decided it was time for me to call it a night, too.
"Kate, I'm gonna head back to the room. Do you wanna come?" I yelled.
"No, I'm going to hang around awhile. But who are you going to walk home with?" she asked as the disco lights turned her face alternately red and blue. I knew that I really shouldn't walk home alone at night, especially tipsy. And most of time I made sure that I walked home with a group. But I didn't have to energy to ask around for an escort, or wait around for Kate to be ready tonight, so I just lied. "Oh, I'm going to walk home with a few folks from Stiles," I said, hoping that Kate was having too much fun or too drunk to think about my explanation.
"OK," she said. "See you in the morning."
I slowly made my way off the dance floor and went to wait on the coat check line to get my jacket. There were at least 10 people ahead of me, so I leaned against the wall and stared at the floor blankly. My meditation on nothing was interrupted by a familiar voice. "Bella, there you are!"
"Hey, Edward," I said in a monotone, barely glancing up to look at him.
"Are you going home?" he asked.
"What gave it away?" I replied snidely.
Apparently, he was too drunk to register my sarcasm, or maybe he just didn't care, because he said without irony, "Well, I'm getting ready to go, too. We can leave together." He gave me a big smile.
"What happened to Nikki?" I asked in a less neutral voice than I had hoped.
Edward shrugged. "I don't know. She called me 'Eddie' a few more times, which I hate, and then she saw someone else to hang on and she moved on," Edward said with a bit of disdain. "Of course, you were already gone by then," he continued as he looked me directly in the eyes.
"It kind of seemed like I was a bit superfluous to the group at that point," I said, glancing at the ground and blushing. Great, now I've basically admitted to him that I was jealous and hurt. Perfect. Can this night actually get worse?
Edward looked at me in confusion, like I had just said something he didn't understand. He sort of shook his head as if he was trying to make sense of me.
"Bella, you're – I just don't -" he started to say when the coat girl yelled, "Next."
I stepped up to the coat check window and handed the heavily pierced and made up girl my $2, then waited while she found my jacket. As she pushed it over the ledge to me, Edward grabbed the jacket and held it out for me to slip my arms into. I glanced at him, shrugged, and then turned my back to him so he could help me into my coat.
"Come on, let me walk you home," he said as we walked toward the exit.
"You really don't need to," I replied. "I'm going home with some friends from Stiles," I explained, repeating my lie from earlier. Moron. You could have had a safe walk home and you are throwing it away for what? Pride?
"I know I don't need to," Edward replied. "I want to." He paused and then looked hard at me again. "It seemed like we were having a really good time together tonight until you split on me. Now you don't even want to let me walk you home?"
We were at the exit and I realized that I would need to find some people to walk home with if I didn't agree to go with him, otherwise he would bust me for my lie. And Edward did not seem like the kind of guy who would let a girl walk a few blocks by herself in New Haven after midnight. "Fine, whatever, walk me home," I said with a noncommittal shrug.
"Thanks for allowing me the honor," Edward said with a sarcastic grin. He held the door to Toad's open for me and followed me out on to the street.
"So, did you have fun the rest of the night?" he asked as he walked me down York.
"Sure," I answered.
"Try to not to get too excited, Bella. You might hurt yourself," he replied.
"Yeah, I'm just tired. All that dancing and drinking and whatever. I had a great time," I said, aiming for a more convincing tone. "You?"
"Well, I had a great time at the start, but the second half of the night kind of sucked," he answered as we dashed across Elm Street to avoid the oncoming traffic.
When we got to the sidewalk, I asked, "Why's that?" just to be polite.
"Well, because I wasn't with you anymore," he replied smiling at me like I was a little slow in the head.
I came to a dead stop as we walked through Elm Street Gate.
"What?" I asked with a look of deep annoyance. "Edward, I'm not in the mood for you to screw around with my head tonight," I said with a sigh.
"Why would you think that I am screwing with you?" he asked, sounding sort of aggravated.
"Edward, what are you talking about? Why would me leaving you at the bar with Nikki make any difference to you? Why do you keep flirting with me?"
"Because I like you Bella," he said. I must have looked completely shocked or confused, because he continued, "Which, apparently I have been doing a shockingly poor job of demonstrating to you. Or you are just incredibly thick. I'm pretty sure that I was quite obvious this week, so I think it is you. Maybe this will get my message across." Then he put his hands on my shoulders to hold me still and leaned in and kissed me.
My mind was frozen with shock. But my body knew exactly what to do, and I was suddenly kissing him back. My hands somehow wound up resting on his waist and one of his hands left my shoulder to slide down my back. I began to lean into him when my brain snapped back on and screamed "STOP."
I suddenly pulled away and blushed scarlet. "Oh," I said as I put my hand to my mouth and looked at him with a combination of shame and surprise.
"Well, 'oh' wasn't exactly what I was going for, but it's a start," he said with a grin.
"Oh, no, not a start," I stammered. "Nothing is a start. Edward, I really like you, honestly, probably way too much for my own good, but you know, I'm seeing someone. Someone whose place you drove me home from. And I really like him, too, and I don't think I should break up with him. You're great and funny, and I always have so much fun with you and everything, but I'm dating Jacob," I babbled while my eyes flew from one spot to another, looking at anything other than his face. "There's just so much going on, with being a freshman and everything is new and confusing and I think I would totally freak out if I broke up with Jacob for you and then you dumped me and moved on, like you totally would. Really, I like you, too, and I love spending time with you but it's just not the right time for, for this" I finished, gesturing between us and sounding lame and crazy even to myself. I looked up at him to see how he took that over-sharing.
"Wow. That was- what was that?" He shook his head and gave me a puzzled glance. I just stood there fidgeting and staring at the ground again. "All right. I just have one thing to say in reply," he said as he reached down and touched my cheek, gently forcing me to look at him again. "Change your mind."
Then he turned around and walked down Elm Street while I stared at his retreating back.
A/N
One more little Yale thing: DUH stands for "Department of Undergraduate Health." At some point, the name was changed to "University Health Services", but the "DUH" shorthand stuck among the undergrads. It's the walk-in doctor's office for undergrads.
Oh yeah - and please review and share this story with your friends (RL or online)!
Spanish translations:
"¿Dónde estabas este fin de semana?" = Where were you this weekend?
"Yo . . . estaba aquí. Fui a Mory's." = I was here. I went to Mory's.
"¿De verdad?" = Really? or For real?
"Sí, con Rosalie y Kate y . . . Fuimos por la cumpleaños de Valerie." = Yes, with Rosalie and Kate and . . . We went for Valerie's birthday.
"Teniamos mucho um, sonrisas." = We had to a lot of smiles - Bella is trying to say "we had a lot of fun," but she doesn't know how to say that in Spanish, so she actually says something that doesn't make a lot of sense.
¡Los dos! Cuando Rose, uh . . . licked el . . . rim de la taza y . . . um . . . spun esto en su cabeza, um . . . pienso no, no, uh pensé! que yo . . . uh . . . era? Ugh! = Both! When Rose, uh . . . licked the . . . rim of the cup and . . . um . . . spun it on her head, um . . . I think, no, no, uh, I thought! that I . . . uh . . . was? Ugh!