Sorry for the delay, got back from Volunteer work at the weekend and had to go straight back to work. Hope you all enjoy the next chapter, don't forget to let me know what you all think.

Chapter 7

Olivia made the coffee and sat next to Elliot at the table.

"I'm sorry about the way I went on yesterday," she said to him, looking down into her cup.

"Don't be Liv, I can't even imagine what you must have thought when you walked in and seen me sitting here."

"Yeah it was a bit much to take in. I have prayed every day to see you again." She said not looking up at him. "Once Don explained everything to me, including what happened in Afghan, I kinda calmed down. I know you only done what you had to do to keep your family safe," she looked at him and smiled slightly. "I guess you couldn't help yourself when you rescued that young girl."

"Yeah I guess the cop in me will always be there. But Liv I didn't only disappear to keep my kids and Kathy safe, I done it for you as well. I couldn't let anything happen to you cause of me." He reached across the table towards her and touched the necklace she was wearing. "Is that mine?" he asked her touching the medal on the chain.

"Yeah the kids found it and made it into a necklace for me, they gave it to me for Christmas….you don't mind do you?"

Elliot shook his head "No I don't mind, I don't mind at all. It's kinda nice that the kids thought about you…. I hear you and Kathy got quite close over the years."

"Yeah, we sort of stuck together to help the kids with your death. It was good for me as well it helped me stay close to you." she looked over to him. "You have no idea how hard it hit me El, losing you like that." He reached over and took her hand as he saw the tears forming in her eyes.

"I'm sorry I had to put you through all that Liv, but I honestly thought at the time I had no other choice. All I knew was I had to protect you and my kids I couldn't let any harm come to you."

"I know El….. It's just I never got the chance to tell you things and then you were gone, taken from me. I was hurt, angry and upset all at once….. I fell apart for a while. Then at your funeral I realised the kids needed me and it gave me something to focus on."

"I know…" he told her. "I saw you holding Dickie at the graveside."

"You…You were there?"

"Yeah, it was my final chance to see you all before I left, at one point you turned and looked straight at the car, I thought you had actually seen me."

Olivia smiled slightly "I had a strange feeling someone was watching us, I can't explain it I just knew something wasn't right."

Elliot grabbed her hand harder "It was so hard to drive away and leave you all, leave you Liv, like you I had so much I wanted to say, that I never got round to saying."

"Like what?" she asked him.

Elliot shook his head as they heard the knock on the door "That can wait for another time," he smiled pushing himself away from the table and heading to the door. He opened it and Munch, Fin and Cragen walked in.

"Breakfast is here," grinned Munch lifting up a bag.

They all ate, talked and laughed as they caught up on the last two and a half years before Fin and Munch headed off to the precinct. Olivia excused herself after asking Elliot if it was okay if she took a shower. Once they were left alone Cragen turned to Elliot.

"So, how are you holding up?" he asked.

"I'm good… especially now Liv knows, I feel like a huge weight has been lifted having her by my side."

Cragen smiled "That's good Elliot; I must admit I have never seen her looking that happy for a long time."

"Yeah, well we have a lot to talk about, but we don't need to rush things, I'm not planning on going anywhere."

"I just don't want her hurt anymore Elliot."

"I Won't Don I promise, the last thing I want to do is cause her anymore hurt." Elliot looked down at his hands resting on the table, "Munch and Fin told me she didn't have anyone in her life?" he said not looking up.

Cragen smiled "They were right she hasn't dated or seen anyone since your death."

Elliot nodded "Do you know why?"

"That's a question you need to ask her," he told him.

Elliot looked towards the bathroom and heard the shower still running "Don, I ….I loved her, I still love her. Before I left I tried so many times to tell her how I felt. But something always got in the way. I mean I always cared for her, but something changed over the years, and I fell in love with her, but I couldn't tell her cause I was married. Then me and Kathy got divorced and I was going to tell her then, but I know Liv she would have blamed herself for me and Kathy splitting, so I kept my feelings to myself, I was just waiting for the right time, I guess I waited a little too long."

Cragen stood up and poured them both another coffee. "You have time now, just don't muck things up, her heart was broken when she thought she had lost you, I don't want her hurt again."

They heard the door to the bathroom open and Olivia came out dressed and drying her hair, "I'm gonna have to go home and grab some clothes sometime today, I can't live in these ones if I'm staying here with you." she told them, looking at Elliot. Elliot looked at her, a look of shock on his face. "What you think I'm just goin to go home and leave you here alone."

"I don't know, I just thought, you know….."

"Like I said El we are in this together now and I am here for you, to help in any way I can, your still my partner and best friend, I aint going anywhere."

Cragen handed her a coffee and they both sat at the table Olivia sitting as close as she could to Elliot.

"We need to decide how we are going to tell Kathy and the Kids," said Cragen.

"Well they are still at your mams," Olivia told Elliot, "They aren't going back to Florida till next week." Olivia looked at Elliot. "El, Kathy remarried last year…."

"Yeah I know the guys told me, I'm glad she deserves to be happy, do the kids like him?"

"Yeah they do, he treats them well, and he has never tried to take your place. The kids talk about you all the time to him, he is really good with them, and he encourages them to talk about you."

"That's good," he smiled but Olivia could tell he was upset. She reached up and turned his head towards her cupping his cheek.

"Hey, he may be good with them, but you're their dad, it's you they miss every night and morning." She wiped the tear from his cheek.

"Liv they think I'm dead… they think I died, what if they hate me for leaving them, for lying. What if they want nothing to do with me? I don't know if I could handle that."

Cragen stood up and moved into the other room to give them some time alone. Neither of them realised he had gone they were so focused on each other.

"El, I'm not gonna lie, and say everything will be okay, it's going to be hard on them. Look how I reacted. But they will accept what happened and they will calm down, they love you and miss you, and to know their Dad isn't dead….. I will be there with you the full time by your side, I won't leave you, I promise."

Elliot sniffed and felt Olivia wipe the tears away "You promise you will stay with me."

"I promise, I'm not going anywhere," she told him as the space between them got smaller.

"Good, cause I don't think I can do this alone," he said as their foreheads touched. "I have been alone the last two and half years, I can't go through that again."

"I lost you once, I'm not letting you out my sight again," Olivia whispered, her mouth centimetres away from Elliot's.

"God I missed you," he said as his lips brushed against hers.

"I missed you to," she replied as their lips met and they kissed softly and gently. Olivia pulled back a smile on her lips. "Wow," she said, her gaze never leaving Elliot.

"Yeah…. My thoughts exactly," he smiled back. "Punch me," he told her.

"What?" she asked him.

"Punch me, I need to know that wasn't a dream that we really did kiss. I have dreamt of kissing you for years, but every time it happened…."

"You woke from the dream." She finished for him.

"Yeah."

"Me too I have had that same sort of dream since the night Cragen told us you had gone."

"I think we should do it again," he grinned. "You know just to make sure it actually happened."

"Sounds good to me," she sighed into his mouth as their lips met again, parting slightly as Elliot ran his tongue over her lower lip tasting her, before slipping his tongue in to meet hers. They pulled apart slightly. "You don't know how many years I have been waiting to do that, to feel your lips on mine."

"I know I have wanted to do it since the day I met you," he smiled leaning forward and capturing her lips again, now he had finally tasted her he didn't want to stop.

"Ahem!" said Cragen. They both pulled apart and looked at their Captain the smiles still on their faces. "As much as I hate to interrupt, we need to decide how we are going to tell Kathy and the kids."

Olivia looked at Elliot "I will do it," she told him. "I mean with you Cap, we will do it together. Kathy and I have got quite close, I think we should tell her and Elliot's mam first and then all of us tell the kids."

Elliot nodded "I think that would be best."

Cragen nodded "Make the call, the sooner everyone knows the easier it will be, asked her to meet you at your apartment." Olivia nodded and took out her phone and found Kathy's number.

"Hey Kathy," she said standing up from the table and walking to the window. "Yeah everything is good….. No I just went out for a few drinks…sound good….. Listen, I need to talk to you and Bernie, alone…. I can't explain over the phone….. No nothing is wrong with me, why don't you meet me at my apartment about six this evening and I will explain everything then….. Okay will see you then, bye Kathy." Olivia hung up and put her phone on the table. "Now we just wait," she said smiling at Elliot, who just nodded.

Cragen left and told Olivia he would meet her at her apartment later that day.

"So what we going to do now?" asked Elliot. "It's not like we can go out, I can't risk anyone seeing me until the kids are told."

"I don't know, what do you fancy doin?" she asked her eyes lighting up and walking towards him. "I could think of a few things we could do to pass the time." She bent over and kissed him again hard and passionately.

"Oh you can, can you?" he grinned back. "Maybe we should get more comfy then." He said as he wheeled himself to the couch and pushed himself out of his chair. Olivia smiled and followed him and straddled his legs keeping her weight off his legs.

"Is this okay?" she asked him, scared in case she hurt him.

"Its fine Baby," he told her as he placed his hands on her hips and pulled her to him. She dipped her head and kissed him, slowly first then turning harder and more passionate. Elliot ran his hands softly up and down her back over the top of her thin shirt. He heard her moaning into his mouth. Olivia began running her hand down his chest, feeling his hard chest and abs under his t-shirt. She lifted the bottom of his t-shirt and moved her hands underneath.

"God you feel so good," she mumbled as she gently sucked and licked and his neck. She moved back slightly and moved her hand to the waistline of his sweats and was about to move her hand inside when She felt Elliot's hand grip her wrist.

"Liv, wait" he gasped.

"We have waited over ten years; I don't want to wait any longer."

"LIV STOP!" he yelled and pushed her off him. She fell to the side and rolled off the couch landing on the floor. Elliot reached forward and grabbed his wheelchair pulling it to him and climbed in.

Olivia stood up right and looked at him, shocked, hurt and angry at the way he pushed her away.

"What the hell is wrong?" she asked him. "Did I do something wrong? Did I hurt you?"

"No….. No you did….. Everything is, you did nothing wrong." He stammered.

"So why did you stop me, why did you push me away?"

Elliot turned his chair away unable to look at her "Maybe we should slow things down a bit, take our time."

"El we have been waiting for this for years, it's not like we have just met and don't know each other. I want you so much, are you saying you don't feel the same"

"Yeah I know that, and I do feel the same, but…"

"But what? What is it…...?"

"Liv look at me," he said spinning round in his chair. "I'm stuck in this fucking chair…."

"So…. You think that bothers me, I love you El no matter what, and I want to be with you. I don't care that you're in that chair. I fell in love with for the person you are in here" she said tapping her chest.

Elliot looked at her holding back the tears, "and I love you to."

"So what is the problem?" she asked him closing the gap.

"I… I don't know if I can," he said not looking at her. "I don't know if I'm able to have sex, I don't know if everything works, alright!" he told her, starting to get angry. "Since I was shot I have never you know… had an erection."

"El ….." she said reaching for his hand.

"Don't!" he snapped. "Don't pity me… look, maybe we should just forget everything, the kiss everything, I'm sorry but I can't do this… just leave." He spun his chair around and left Olivia stood alone as he went into his room and slammed the door. Olivia just stood staring at the closed door.

"What the hell" she thought. "What just happened." she shook her head as if it would help her understand everything. She felt the tears stinging her eyes and walked over to the closed door. She tapped gently and waited for him to answer.

"El…" she called through the door. "I know you can hear me….. Please let me in." She waited for a reply and was met with silence. "El open the fucking door and stop being stupid!" she yelled kicking the door.

"Liv please, just leave, I can't do this." he told her. Olivia could hear he was crying.

"El please…. I love you, and I know you love me, just open the door so we can talk…please don't do this." She listened but heard nothing. "El I understand you're worried and scared, I am as well. But I told you I wasn't going anywhere and I mean that, we are in this together, no matter how much you try and push me away. I thought I lost you two and a half years for ever, there is no way I am letting you go and losing you again. If there is something wrong then we will work through it." She placed her hand on the door and dropped her head against it. "I fell in love with you Stabler years ago, I fell in love with you before I even touched, held or kissed you. I fell in love with you when you were someone else's and I had to watch you going home to her every night. I don't need sex to know I want to spend the rest of my life with you." she stepped back from the door. "I will give you some time as I have to go and meet Kathy, but I will be back and we will talk about this….. I love you El." She said walking away from the door and wiping her tears away.

She pulled her phone out her pocket and found Haungs number as she walked out the front door.

"Hey George it's Liv, I need you to talk to El… No he doesn't know I have asked you, but he needs your help….. I will be away most the day, he will be alone, so if you could…..Okay thank you." she said hanging up. She knew El would be angry at her but she had to try and do something she couldn't lose him again.

How will Kathy and Bernie take the news, and what will happen when Liv gets home after Elliot has been visited by Haung.