Oh SURE, I see how it is. When I actually try to write out the commission, you all abandon me, but the instant I finally FINISH it, you suddenly pop up again! Stupid plot bunnies...giving me ideas when I don't need them...

...For the record, I blame RAGA. And Zeynel.

This continuation's for you both.

Shaken, Not Stirred: Part 2

About a week and a half after being released from Ai's 'care' with a clean bill of health and in need of some serious therapy, Kaito returned to his detective friends (wait—they were friends?) with an important warning to impart.

"She's evil! EVIL, I TELL YOU!"

Said "friends", sadly, were not taking his warning as seriously as he felt they should.

"Kuroba, she's SEVEN. How could she POSSIBLY do everything that you claimed?"

"Actually—" Hattori spoke up, but quickly quieted down from the warning glare Conan gave him. Hakuba gave the Osakan a strange look before turning back to the magician.

"Anyway, you're taking this joke of yours too far. I've seen you pull off some crazy things, Kuroba, but trying to accuse a little girl of taking out a group of heavily armed men and turning them into furry house pets is a bit much. Even for you." He sighed, shaking his head. "Honestly, I don't even see the point in this prank."

"It's NOT a prank!" Kaito exclaimed, waving his arms around dramatically to enunciate the point. "She's got a secret lab and everything!"

"How would you know this?" Hattori asked.

"It's where she locked me up for over a week!"

"Why would she lock YOU up? Were you at the KID heist?" Hakuba questioned, giving a small smirk at the slip that further proved his 'Kuroba is KID' theory.

"That's BESIDES the point!" He looked imploringly to Hattori. "Tell me you believe me! You're good at reading people! You should know!"

Hattori rubbed the back of his neck, unsure. "Well...Ai is pretty mature for her age." No kidding. "But still, cats? That's a bit much."

"Try 'impossible'." Hakuba retorted. "You can't transform a human being into a smaller creature. It just doesn't happen."

Hattori coughed in an attempt to hold back laughter and Conan's eye twitched, but both wisely chose not to comment on the matter.

"But it DID!"

"Did you actually see it?" Conan asked him.

Kaito slumped. "Well, no...but she all but outright admitted to it!"

"A confession?" Hattori asked, curiously. "She actually said 'I turned them into cats' or did she just make vague statements that could possibly allude to it?"

Kaito's shoulders drooped even further. "Well...kinda, yeah..."

Hakuba shook his head. "She's simply a child. From the sounds of it, she was likely just playing games in order to get a rise out of you. And it worked." He gave Kaito a disappointed look. "I'm surprised that a trickster of your caliber fell for it."

"But then where did she get the cats?"

"There are a number of cats in this city, plenty of which are just wandering around. She and those other friends of hers probably just found some and she's keeping them until something else can be arranged. Is that it, Edogawa?" Hattori looked down to the bespectacled boy.

Conan nodded, smiling in a way an actual child would. "Ai's the only one of us who is able to house them, so the rest of the Shonen Tantei are all trying to find homes for them now!"

That of course, didn't answer the question of where they had gotten the cats in the first place, as they were simply there one day when the children had visited Agasa's house. But given that it WAS Ai they were talking about, there was surely some rational explanation for their sudden appearance.

"Then what about the bad guys who were holding her hostage? Where'd they disappear to?"

"Well, since they ARE 'bad guys', odds are they escaped." Saguru explained.

"And just let her go?"

"Well, what would they want with her, anyway?" Conan questioned. "She could just attract attention."

"Besides," Hattori added. "You're the only one who has even claimed there were any criminals there. No one else saw anything and Ai hasn't said anything about being held hostage, either."

"Given that no one else has spoken up about it and knowing your personality and tendency for pranks, I can only conclude that this was simply a bad attempt at a prank on your part." Hakuba nodded, set in his decision. "And even if you were right and there WERE criminals holding her hostage at the heist, here is simply no way a child could have taken down her captor, much less an entire group of them."

Conan rolled his eyes at that, but again chose not to comment.

"But...but..." Kaito whined, unable to make out any other points that wouldn't also reveal his identity as Kid to his longtime stalker-slash-nemesis.

"Give it up already, Kuroba. Your trick never would have worked." Hakuba scoffed. "What was your plan, anyway? Trying to make us paranoid of a child so we would investigate and you could turn us in for stalking?"

That was actually a very good idea for a prank, Kaito realized. It was a shame that he couldn't try it out, and even more disappointing in that he was actually TRYING to be serious here. "That's not it at ALL!"

"I've met the girl. She's simply mature for her age." Saguru reasoned. "Besides, if you're going to make such claims about her, how is she all that different from Edogawa-san, here? Are you going to claim HE'S the result of one of her 'experiments', too?"

Conan choked. That had hit just a tad bit too close to the mark.

"I hate to say it, but I have to agree with him." Hattori told Kaito, nodding towards Hakuba and trying to bring attention away from Conan. "I mean, Ai's capable of a lot of things..." Such as turning people into children, but it was probably better not to mention that part. "But turning killers into cats? That just doesn't seem possible."

"Fine! But don't come 'meow-ing' to me when she goes for YOU next!" Kaito warned.

"Whatever. This has gotten old, so I'm just going to take my leave now." Hakuba said, getting to his feet and heading for the door, leaving a stricken-looking Kaito behind.

"Yeah, I've got to head out, too. Thanks, Kuroba. This was kinda fun...in a weird, crazy sorta way." Hattori waved and moved to follow the other outside.

With the two older detectives having made their exit, Kaito looked desperately to the one lifeline he had left to prove his sanity. "Tantei-kun, that girl is evil! Tell me you know this! You're the only one I can really accept as something like an equal—don't take that from me!"

The bespectacled boy shook his head, sighing. "Seriously, you and your delusions. 'Ai is evil and turns people into cats.' 'Akako's a witch trying to make me her love slave.' 'Conan's gonna reap us of our very souls.'"

"But it's tru—"Kid froze, confused. "Wait—I only think that last one out of fear of you and the tendency for people to be mysteriously murdered when you're around. I've never said it out loud."

"Oh, I reap souls AND secrets." Conan shrugged, nonchalantly. "How do you think I make such a great detective?"

He then walked away, appearing oblivious to the way Kaito's eyes widened and his pupils shrunk to tiny dots in sheer horror.

Omake:

Ai entered the room to see Conan watching television. "Hey, Kudo?"

"Yeah?"

"Any reason why Kuroba is in the other room curled up in a fetal position on the floor and muttering about evil children, cats, and the taking of souls?"

"Oh, he just freaked out earlier and started spouting crazy talk about how you experimented on the guys trying to kill him at the KID heists and turned them into cats. Pay him no mind."

"..."

"..."

"...Kudo, you do know I actually DID turn them into cats, right?"

Oh, he knew. But he was simply too grateful over not being her chosen guinea pig this time around to really care.

Meanwhile, in the other room, Kaito finally regained some semblance of control and shakily pushed himself to his feet.

"I know! I'll break into her lab and find evidence of her work! That'll prove I'm not crazy!" He then began to laugh in a creepy, maniacal way that didn't do much to convince anyone who heard it that he wasn't.

The fact that the kids caught him breaking into Ai's lab while humming the theme to Mission Impossible a few days later probably didn't help, either.