Fluffy Hair and Nosy Bosses

Disclaimer: Still not in possession of either show.
A/N I: Thanks to Unwritten-Destiny for the suggestion! I'm not telling you what it was until the end.
A/N II: Thanks to shestarsky, TMVH50, volvagia09, kath46, ncisloverinnc, and sunny irish for leaving reviews! Reading through them made me decide that the coconuts are going to make a reappearance. Right now it's just a little scene so I have to find something else to add to it to make it a full chapter.
A/N III: Same deal as the first chapter, I'd rather see the centre-justified things on the right instead.

You're a Bum

Your state motto is 'Eureka!'

Oh, and yours is so much better?

'Liberty and Prosperity': strong and proud like its citizens.

Boring old coots!

Hippies!

"The next time you decide it's a good idea to force a foot chase to travel through a heavy wooded area, I'll clothesline you with a branch! What were you thinking?! I realize that you've naturalized to the wild and enjoy eating tree bark, but in polite society, we chase people down roads where the other police officers can join in the hunt. That way we are able to have things like back-up. And no, before you open your mouth, I am not your back-up, I'm your partner! I am a partner that does not appreciate coming thisclose to falling down multiple cliffs because you can't cut someone off like a normal human. No, you have to swing down from the sky like an ape! Did you know that my dry cleaners have a bet going for what disaster I bring in next? Gracie gave me this tie, you better hope that this red dirt stain comes out, or you'll be taking her shopping for a new one!" Danny planted his hands on his hips that had been previously waving and seethed.

Steve took this as his cue to leave and fought the urge to say something as that would most likely get him to start up again. He backed out of the door and headed over to Kono and Chin who were standing in the hallway taking in the show.

"He's back."

Bruce Springsteen, Bon Jovi, and Sinatra!

Beach Boys, Journey, and The Eagles!

Explain Katy Perry!

Explain Snooki!

You're a bum!

If a person could be standing beside both participants in the on-going battle, they would have heard an angry "hmph" occur simultaneously. Minutes passed as either side considered the past week of insults lobbed over the ocean. What started out as light teasing had somehow deteriorated into a war of east versus west. Simultaneous sighs sounded, neither wanted the friendship they had formed to end, but what does one say when your friend has resorted to googling to dig up new insults and you have done the same?

Even if you are a bum,

I need your help.

"I don't know if this is going to work"

"It'll be fine. I've mailed all kinds of things since I landed on this remote rock of insanity."

"Not that, I'm being followed by Callen and Sam. I had a suspicion, but then Nell gave me a heads-up. She saw our GPS locations and thought something was weird."

"Don't you get freaked out by always being monitored?"

"I have my ways of slipping it."

"So why don't you slip it this time?"
"This is Callen and Sam – they're harder to slip if I'm not prepared."

"So do you have a solution, because I can't do this by myself."

"Do you have any friends that can't be directly connected to you that would act as a middle man?"

Danny thought for a moment. "I have a buddy from the academy that's a cop in Boston. He was always up for a good prank."

"You think you could get his address in the next half hour?"

"I should be; kill some time and I'll get back to you."

Deeks smiled, time for a wild goose chase. He wanted to see how determined his tails were.

By the time Danny called back, Deeks had led a merry tour of the area around his favourite surf beach. He'd hit the local mall, which had multiple exits, forcing the two to exit the car and follow him on foot. He'd looked in on a registry for an upcoming wedding, shopped for a new pair of sunglasses, and hit on the girl running the perfume counter in one of the department stores. These stops were strategically placed at opposite corners of the mall, designed to keep is tails on their feet.

Finished at the mall, he threaded his way through the outdoor market, stopping here and there to chat with the merchants he knew. This was neither Callen nor Sam's scene, and the glimpses he caught of them could be filed under disgruntled and uncomfortable.

"This is nuts. We've watched him pick out china, stare at himself in mirrors, annoy an undeserving girl, and now we're wandering through a collection of crazy people." Sam fumed, "Why did I agree to spend my Saturday doing this?"

"Because you're as curious as me about what is going on with Deeks. He's clearly killing time."

"He's killing my patience."

"Wait...he's taking a call."

"And he's bee-lining it towards the exit."

"If only we knew who he was talking to."

"If only Eric had been a bit faster."

"Hetty still would've hung you by your toenails."

"She'd never know."

Callen froze in mid-step and then turned towards Sam, oblivious to the pile-up of people behind him. He stared at him, incredulous.

Sam pointed in the direction that Deeks had headed. "He's getting away."

"Hetty...not finding out. We're talking about the same woman right? Short, ninja-like, once almost forced us to waltz together?"

"If you truly believe that, how come you regularly pull stunts saying that she won't know?"

"I believe she doesn't know about them at the time, but I'm under no illusion that she'll never find out."

"Fine, can we go?"

Callen turned forward and they made their way through the crowds towards the exit. Once out, Callen stopped again and said, "wait, what stunts? I've never pulled stunts. Name one time I've pulled a stunt."

Sam sighed, "I left my book of 'Bad Decisions by G. Callen' at home. Let's focus on Deeks for now."

They fell back in step and searched the crowd for the shaggy-headed detective.

"I got him; he's doing some complicated hand-shake with the bongo drummer." Sam, with his height advantage, found him with ease.

"Alright. Let's see where he goes now."

"It better not be another perfume section, I think I smell like roses."

Deeks peeked behind him and passed it off as a lingering look at the redhead that just passed him. Yep, they were still behind him. After he had called Danny and come up with their contingency plan, he had decided to let them follow him. It would give them something to latch onto and lead them in a different direction.

He wove through the crowd and came upon his buddy's shop. There were plenty of windows facing the outside, so they could keep an eye on him from outside. In order to accommodate them and therefore let him do his shopping in peace, he kept within sight of the outside at all times. He made sure that they could see what he picked out, watch him as he brought it to the counter and pay for it. He had his conversation, did another complicated hand-shake with the cashier, and left the store, empty handed.

He shoved his hands deep into his pockets, raised his face into the heat of the sun, and then disappeared into the crowd.

Sam craned his neck and when that didn't work, he jumped up on a bench. "I lost him. His in the crowd somewhere, but I can't see him."

Callen shrugged, "well, we know he went into that store, bought something but didn't leave with it. I say we find out what it is."

"Badge them?"

"No, it looked like he was familiar with them. If we tell them who we are or that we know him, they'll try to protect him."

"I'll get the cashier out from behind the desk and you check the book she was writing in."

"Sounds good."

Sam walked in and, with a self-deprecating smile and a "I'm sorry, but I'm not sure where to start. My buddy sent me here saying you could help. Could you explain the differences between..."

Callen slipped in behind the two and made his way over to the book. A quick scan of it and peek at the shelf below the desk and he was back out the door.

Sam met up with him a few minutes later. "What did you get?"

"What did you get?"

"Nothing, told her I'd check back with my friend and come back."

"I got an address."

"Let's find out where it goes...on Monday. I have better ways to spend my Saturday then working."

"Better ways that don't include me, right? I'm hurt."

"Fine. You can come, only if you promise not to teach my kids how to pick the bathroom door lock again."

"Why would I teach them that again? I'd teach them something new."

"Let me rephrase that: no teaching them anything that is not firmly planted in the white area of legality. No black areas and no grey areas."

"Kill-joy."

Sam shook his head and rolled his eyes. He headed for the car with Callen trailing behind.

Eric was typing away when hands landed on his shoulders. He stopped typing and raised his eyes to the reflective surface above his screen to find Callen and Sam standing over him.

"I'm not hacking into Deeks' phone for you."

"We would never ask you to spy on a colleague for us." Sam's smile had a decidedly false air.

"No, we would just like to know who lives at this address." Callen's eyes sparked with mirth.

"Case related?"

"Yes." Callen answered.

"You realize that I know that both of you are trained liars."

"Do you want to know the truth?" Sam asked.

Eric heaved a sigh. "No, what's the address?"

Callen recited it from memory. Eric tapped away and up came the information.

"Robert Henderson, 32, married with two kids, a cop with the Boston PD. Would you like to know his shoe size?"

Sam stood up straight. "Nah, that's enough. Thanks Eric."

Callen squeezed Eric's shoulder and then followed Sam out. Eric closed the search and went back to his work.

Sam and Callen found a quiet corner in the upper hallway and thought.

Sam was the first to break the silence. "Are you sure that's the address Deeks gave her?" At Callen's nod, he continued, "What exactly did he buy?"

"I don't know, but it was clear he was having it shipped to this Robert Henderson."

"He's Boston PD, he probably knows him the same way we know Gibbs out in D.C."

"Probably a dead end; he wouldn't hide a conversations with a cop from us. He'd probably be happy to prove not all cops dislike him."

"Unless he's thinking of moving out there."

"And leave the surfing? Can't do that there."

"Probably a birthday present or something like that. A onetime thing. We have to keep looking."

They took the stairs down to their desks. Deeks slid out from behind the wall and watched them go. His secret was safe so far.

Danny ripped the packing slips off of the box and grabbed the roll of wrapping paper. One thing that becoming the single father of a little girl had taught him was proper gift-wrapping technique. He cut the paper to the proper size, taped, and folded until it was perfectly wrapped. He finished it off with the card taped to the top and tucked it under his arm.

At work he grabbed it off of the passenger seat and walked up the stairs. He nodded at Steve to follow him and they headed back down to the interrogation room. They joined the group of people milling around and they waited for the text. Steve got it and snapped his fingers and waved his hand across his throat to signal everyone to be quiet.

They could hear voices coming down the hallway. "What case is this from? How'd you get a suspect in here by yourself?"

"Danny brought him in this morning, he asked for your help. He's still annoyed with Steve about that tie."

Steve looked over at Danny who nodded and pointed at his missing tie while mouthing 'you owe me'.

Kono opened the door at the same moment Chin flipped the lights on from outside and everyone yelled "Surprise!"

She stood there, frozen in time, taking in the crowd of people, the 'happy birthday' banner hanging from the ceiling and the cake sitting on the interrogation chair.

Once the shock had worn off and she'd had a chance to greet everyone, Danny handed her the package he'd been carrying around.

"Happy birthday."

She smiled and opened the card, chuckling at the various things Steve, Max, Kamekona, and he had written. She passed the card and envelope over to him and tore the paper off the box, letting it float to the floor. He was about to open his mouth to tell her that he'd go grab a pair of scissors for her when she pulled a knife out of her back pocket.

"Swiss army knife, nice. You've been hanging around Steve too long."

"Not long enough, I have a switchblade."

"Which are illegal."

Steve shrugged and Danny sighed.

She got the box open and rummaged through the packing peanuts to pull out a jar of surfboard wax. Her face lit up as she read the label. "I've been looking for this stuff all over the island. Where did you find it?"

"There is more to this country than Hawaii...I'm not telling." Danny smiled.

She shrugged her shoulders in the universal 'I don't know what to say' gesture and gave each of the card-signers a hug.

Danny typed a message out on his phone: Thanks bud, she loved it.

A/N: Unwritten-Destiny said 'a surfing thing' and this is what popped out. Thanks again!