NOTES: Just as a reference and reminder, once again, here's the list of who's who in the groups and their curses.

1) Harry, Blaise, Michael, Justin, Daphne, Ernie (emu; orangutan; stag-moose; crocodile; snow leopard; golden eagle)

2) Hermione, Theodore, Edwina, Lisa, Pansy, Sally-Anne (warrior goddess; siren; puffskein; liger; goose; lynx)

3) Ron, Selene, Hannah, Vincent, Anthony, Susan (violent tomboy; spider monkey; rhinoceros; duck; griffin; komodo dragon)

4) Neville, Draco, Rachel, Terry, Seamus, Mandy (wolverine; ferret; packrat; crow; raccoon; nifler)

5) Parvati, Dean, Morgan, Gabriel, Gregory, Sarah (penguin; flying squirrel; Chinese phoenix; hamster; duck; leatherback tortoise)

6) Neil, Billy, Padma, Millicent, Lavender, Wendy (gazelle; goat; panda; musk ox; fruit bat; seal)

Draco didn't slump in his chair like Neville; instead, the Slytherin traced the tabletop's wooden grains with a perfectly manicured fingernail. Both were willing to allow the other four to make their introductions first – Neville, because he was nervous in general, and Draco, who didn't understand why he had to be the only Slytherin in the group. He resented the fact that there were two Gryffindors.

"Hello, I'm Rachel Hatfield, and I fell into the Spring of the Drowned Packrat."

"Hello," said everyone but Draco, sounding slightly bored.

"One good thing about my curse is how it has renewed my interest in my old button collection."

"Sweet!" declared Mandy Brocklehurst, who was a hyperactive Ravenclaw often getting into trouble for constantly running when she should be walking, vibrating with excessive, nervous energy when she was supposed to be sitting still, and consuming copious amounts of sugar and caffeine. "I love buttons!" Draco glared at her, and then looked at Neville. He didn't know which of the two he hated most to be seated beside.

Terry Boots seemed to consider Mandy's words. "Buttons can be shiny," he said.

Rachel's face lit up with a bright smile. "I've just recently polished my entire collection, and I've added three new buttons. The Headmaster even gave me one when I saw him this morning during my appointment!"

oOoOoOo

Harry's table was silent until someone kicked him in the ankle. "Ouch! What's that for?"

Daphne rolled her eyes. "You're the Gryffindor. Set the standard for which the rest of us must reveal our hearts and bare our souls."

"You have a soul?" Harry figured out which direction the kick came from after he said that. Apparently, Daphne had longer legs than he realized. "Fine. Whatever. I'm Harry Potter, and I fell into two springs. The first was the Spring of the Drowned Emo – very tragic story of a suicidal goth emo teenager who drowned himself in the spring a few years ago. And then I fell into the Spring of the Drowned Emu. Now, I'm stuck being an emo emu whenever I make contact with cold water."

Michael snickered. "So, you're saying that you're an overemotional chicken? How wonderfully ironic!" He jumped suddenly in his seat, and then glared sideways at Daphne.

"No, I'm saying that I become a depressed, gawky, flightless bird."

"You're supposed to come up with something positive," Blaise pointed out.

"Fine. I'm also the world's second-tallest bird, which means this is probably the only way I'll ever be more than six feet tall. Now it's your turn to contribute something positive."

The others thought about that. "Eh, that's as positive a reason as any," Blaise said. "Emus also apparently make very good eating." Harry glared at him. "Hey, the professors didn't say what kind of positive we're supposed to contribute!"

"I don't think being someone's idea of good eating is very positive," Harry replied.

"I guess you're right then. Well, then, how about despite being a depressed and gawky flightless bird, you're kind of cute."

Harry blushed. "Look, just don't anyone bother anymore, okay?"

Blaise shrugged. "Can't please anyone," he muttered. "I'm Blaise Zabini, and I fell into the Spring of the Drowned Orangutan. I have four opposable thumbs and got away with climbing the Library shelves this morning." He wagged his eyebrows at Daphne, who huffed and pouted. "I also had no problem climbing into the Forbidden Section, so if anyone needs a book from there, just let me know and I'll see what I can fetch. If I feel like it."

"So, does this mean that the Slytherins are evolutionary throwbacks-" Harry ducked when Blaise elbowed him. He grinned and scooted his chair closer to Ernie. "Sorry, sorry. Couldn't resist myself."

"Well, saying as an orangutan is much more productive than an emu, I'd say we're definitely an improvement, evolutionary-wise, over the Gryffindors. But that was never a hard thing to achieve." Harry pondered the sudden realized that most non-Muggleborn wizards and witches probably had no idea what evolution even was. "As long as no one says anything about my mother," Blaise warned them.

"I'm Michael Corner, and I fell into the Spring of the Drowned Stag-Moose. My species has actually been extinct for thousands of years, which makes me a one-of-a-kind! I'm a huge moose-like creature, and I stand taller than seven feet at the shoulder." He smirked smugly at Harry.

"Just don't go wandering into any area with Muggle scientists and you'll do good," Ernie said. "Because I'd really hate to see a bunch of Muggle scientists lock you away for life as they perform all sorts of many different tests on you. I bet they'd do anal probing and everything. But on the other hand, think of all the stuff you could do for science!"

"I so didn't need to know that," Michael muttered.

"I'm Justin Finch-Fletchley, and I fell into the Spring of the Drowned Crocodile."

"How does a crocodile drown?" Daphne demanded as she slurped her tea.

"How the bloody hell am I supposed to know? Do I look like a Ravenclaw to you?" Justin ignored Michael's indignant sputtering. "Anyway, the good thing about being a crocodile." Justin looked blank for a long moment before Michael finally took pity on him and supplied his own reason.

"Crocodile bites have a force of up to five thousand pounds per square inch. That's more than two tons of force."

Justin's surprise quickly became delight. "Really? Cool!" The devious smirk that crossed his face made Daphne and Blaise scoot their chairs from him. "The next person who makes fun of Hufflepuffs is going to get bit in the arse."

"Language, Mister Finch-Fletchley!" Umbridge declared as she flounced past him. "Ten points from Hufflepuff!"

"And she'll be the first," Justin said darkly, twisting in his chair to glare daggers at Umbridge's back. "Chomp chomp, just like that."

"I bet crocodiles make really good friends when you've got some nasty enemies," Daphne said in a flat voice.

oOoOoOo

"My name is Terry Boots, and I fell into the Spring of the Drowned Crow."

"Imagine that," Draco muttered before taking an insolent sip of tea. "A Ravenclaw fell into the spring of its lesser cousin."

"Crows are not lesser cousins to ravens," Terry said grumpily, "and our House mascot is an eagle. In fact-"

"Save me the spiel; I know where the encyclopedia is if I ever must know the difference between ravens and crows and eagles." Draco pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes, as if in pain.

"Since I've become a crow, I've noticed that I enjoy collecting shiny rocks."

"Oooh!" Mandy bounced up and down in her seat. "I love shiny rocks! Did you know there's a special cove in the eastern part of the lake where you can find quartz pebbles?"

Terry's face became animated. "Yes! I found this absolutely beautiful pebble with a streak of pyrite in it just after lunch today!"

Rachel nodded her head so hard her brown pigtails nearly dipped into Neville's tea. "Pyrite is shiny."

Draco felt like beating his head against the table. A bunch of fools speaking of fool's gold. Someone save me!

oOoOoOo

"So, you're saying the reason you're stuck with all of us," Hermione gestured to mean the other four girls at their table, "is because the professors don't trust your curse form to be around the guys? Surely being male should prevent the siren's urge to drag men into the waters to be feasted upon."

Theodore Nott made a face. "It just happens in a flash when my curse takes over. Anyway, I put Draco right back onto dry land once I realized he was just a mouthful of fur, and he's none worse for wear, except around the edges, and he's sort of jumpy when I get close to him. But I'm sure he'll recover just fine. Besides, as it turns out, the Squid and merpeople don't like interlopers on their territory."

"I'm sure that Hermione will have no problem taking care of you if something should happen," said Edwina Smythe in her small, soft voice. "There's nothing I can do as puffskein." She sighed. "And I've tried and I've tried, but I can't think of anything good to say about my cursed form."

The others looked thoughtful before Sally-Anne reached across the table and took her hand into her own. "Puffskeins are absolutely adorable!" the Hufflepuff said firmly. "They make wonderful pets."

"I eat boogies," Edwina grumbled.

"And they wouldn't harm a flea," Sally-Anne continued as if she hadn't heard a thing. "Not like myself, you know. I'm a deadly animal, and I sure wish I hadn't fallen into a Spring that might make it possible for me to kill someone." Edwina looked horrified at such an idea, and Sally-Anne turned to Hermione. "Promise me that you'll stop me, Hermione. If something should happen, if I were to hurt or kill someone when I'm a lynx, I would never be able to forgive myself."

"Oh, stop," Hermione said irritably. "Nothing will happen because lynxes aren't that hostile. Just think of yourself as an overgrown cat without a tail. Don't think in terms of doubt, because you might set yourself up in failure. And you!" She turned to Theodore. "What's this about the Giant Squid and merpeople?"

"It doesn't like me. Neither do the merpeople, but at least I'm stronger than them. The Squid cheated though because it's got more limbs. Mind you, I was barely awake this morning when it happened, though, so I'm sure it would be different were I more alert."

oOoOoOo

"No way!" Mandy squealed when Seamus had introduced himself and his Spring of the Drowned Raccoon. "Is it true that you guys really really really love sugar cubes?"

Seamus smiled and nudged Mandy in the side. "Yeah. It's really fun to wash them in my food, and then they just disintegrate in the tea! I've also realized how interesting watches look in my curse form. Like shiny bands of metal."

"Ooooh! They are shiny, aren't they?"

Rachel looked thoughtful. "Watch faces look like buttons."

Terry was examining his own watch. "They flash when reflecting the light just right. Very shiny."

"We should all get together and share our collections with each other," Mandy suggested with a bright smile.

Draco decided that, for now, Neville was the lesser of the two evils and subtly slid his chair further from Mandy and, inevitably, closer to Neville. Unless Neville started to discuss anything shiny, and then Draco would just hex the lot of them and consequences be damned!

oOoOoOo

"I'm a snow leopard," Daphne declared. She crossed her arms before herself and smiled smugly. "I'm a rare, endangered creature known for its deadliness, and anyone who says different will find himself mauled in some dark corner when you least expect it."

"I think snow leopards are beautiful cats," Harry said, and then wondered with a wince if he had room for one more foot in his mouth.

Daphne glowed and preened. "There's that, too!"

Silence reigned supreme for a moment. "Are we done baring our souls?" Harry asked plaintively.

Blaise shrugged. "Probably not; Ernie still has to go. But just for the record, I hardly think I found much support with you lot." He glared at Daphne. "If you don't stop kicking me, then you'll be very sorry the next time you go into the library."

She cheerfully flashed her teeth at him. "Try me, Blaise. I'm a cat and you're just a monkey."

"Actually," Michael interrupted, "orangutans are a species of great apes and are considered among the world's most intelligent animals – oi! That hurt!" He rubbed his shin and glared at Daphne.

oOoOoOo

"I'm a niffler!" Mandy cried excitedly without introducing herself, undoubtedly because she had done most of the talking anyway. "And I love treasures! I love shiny things, I love buttons and watches and crystals, and they're all just absolutely magnificent! I've got lots of nick-knacks I've begun collecting in my drawer, and-"

"THAT'S IT!" Draco jumped to his feet and shoved his chair back so hard that it skid across the floor and crashed into Susan Abbott's chair. That table's occupants turned and stared wordlessly at Draco. "Shiny this and shiny that! I'm surrounded by kleptomaniacs and I can't take it any more!" He dashed helter-skelter from the room, McGonagall and Umbridge giving chase and yelling at him to stop ("Or ten points from Slytherin for being uncooperative, Mister Malfoy!" they heard McGonagall yell before the door swung shut behind).

Mandy smiled smugly at the questioning and shocked expressions that everyone in the room sent their table. "Don't worry; he'll be back."

"I don't know about that. I think he might just outrun both professors at this point," Neville said nervously.

"I've got his wand," Mandy replied, holding it up.

oOoOoOo

"Seriously?" Vincent asked Selene Moon with a wide grin. "Your parents named you that? What – do they hate you or something?"

Selene frowned. "They named my baby brother Apollo. I don't think they have much by way of imagination, or were going for a strange theme of some sort. My mother really liked Divination and my father mythology, you know? But it could be worse – I could be Morag." Everyone nodded in agreement at that, because Morag MacDougal had the misfortune of being born to parents who were bound and determined to name their child Morag and a little inconvenience like being the wrong sex certainly didn't stop them. "I'm just grateful that woolly spider monkeys have nothing to do with the sun, and that I'm small and obtuse, and I have a really neat tail. It makes carrying my wand easier when I'm cursed, because I get to keep my hands free."

Vincent sipped his tea. "I think that imagination is too overrated sometimes. That's why I like being a duck. Nothing special is expected me. I can swim and fly, and everyone still thinks I'm dumb. Suits me fine. What about you?" He looked at Ron, who looked back with wide eyes.

Ron was deeply disturbed with the notion that Vincent Crabbe was capable of carrying on an intelligent, friendly conversation without reverting to threats, monosyllables, or even grunts. It challenged so many different viewpoints and ideas that she had of the world – or at least of Slytherins in general. "What about me?"

"You didn't just fall into a spring of a drowned girl," Anthony Goldstein pointed out. "I heard what the guide said about you and Harry." He paused long enough to flash a strange look towards Harry that made Ron's eyes narrow. "You fell into the Spring of the Drowned Violent Tomboy. Or maybe it was the Uncute Tomboy. Feeling any violent urges when you're, er, female?"

"I," said Susan Bones, "think that's absolute rubbish thing to say, Anthony Goldstein! You're merely perpetuating the social myth that women are more volatile-tempered than men, even though there's been research to indicate that men tend to be more aggressive and violent, and are more likely to follow through with those urges!"

"I don't think you're uncute," Vincent said offhandedly as he passed the sugar to Hannah. "You're also the only Weasley here at Hogwarts with non-red hair, and I think the dark hair contrasts much more nicely against your skin than the red."

Ron fought down the urge to grab a hammer or bat to bludgeon someone. Irritated, she slapped her hand against the flat of the table. "Except for these lumps on my chest and space between my legs, I don't feel any different than I normally do. Look, I've got the Weasley temper and I'm a guy, so how does my temper or habits change if I become a violent tomboy? Anyway, there's nothing much good to say about what I've become, because I'm terrified of what my mum is going to say."

"At least you've got a mum to care," Susan said patiently. "Mine hasn't spoken to me or my father since my parents divorced six years ago. And I can barely see or hear in my cursed form. But that's okay, I guess, because komodo dragons are the world's largest lizards, I've got a good sense of smell, I'm tough as shoe leather and I have a venomous bite." She looked at Vincent as a friendly smile played across her lips. "That reminds me: how many Slytherins fell into a spring of a drowned snake of some sort?"

Vincent looked thoughtful as he dabbed his lips with his napkin. "One of the Fourth-years fell into the Spring of the Drowned Legless Salamander, so he looks like a snake, but the rest of us are saying he doesn't count. And one of the Seventh-years fell into the Spring of the Drowned Adder, but he's been getting into fights with the Sixth-year who fell into Spring of the Drowned Indian Mongoose. The snake almost always loses, and it's kind of pathetic." He stuffed an entire biscuit into his mouth and chewed twice before swallowing.

"What about you?" Anthony asked Hannah Abbott. "We've all talked about ourselves."

"Except you, too," Susan flicked a stubby finger on the tabletop towards his direction.

"Well, fine then." Anthony frowned in thought. "I fell into the Spring of the Drowned Griffin, and I absolutely resent that because it was a slipping and sliding sixth-year Gryffindor who accidentally knocked me into the Spring. On the bright side, there are worse things to be than a powerful and majestic magical creature, and I've got eagle's wings."

"So you're half Ravenclaw and half Gryffindor?" Ron asked snidely.

Anthony drew himself up in wounded dignity. "I am all Ravenclaw," he declared. "The Sorting Hat never even considered putting me anywhere else!"

"Jeez. It's not like being called a Gryffindor is a bad thing," Ron grumbled as she felt her ears burn.

"Says you," Vincent muttered around another biscuit.

Everyone looked expectedly at Hannah Abbott as she nervously twisted her napkin in her lap. She had remained silent the entire time during the session. She opened and closed her mouth once before her face scrunched up. "I fell into the Spring of the Drowned Black Rhinoceros." Then she raised a fist and shook it at everyone. "And so help me, I'll sock the next person right into next week who makes a wisecrack about my weight and skin!" Then she burst into wailing tears and buried her face against Ron's neck.

The others exchanged uncertain glances. Susan couldn't reach across the table to where Hannah was seated, so she (and Ron) glared at Anthony until he scooted closer to Hannah's other side and tentatively pressed a careful hand against her heaving shoulder. "Well," Anthony began nervously, "it's not a bad thing if you do weigh a ton-"

Hannah whirled around with a shriek and punched Anthony in the nose.

Vincent eyed Anthony bleeding through the fingers he clenched around his nose, and then shoved his pile of napkins across the table. "Okay, you deserved that."

oOoOoOo

"So, here's what we've got." Hermione had transfigured her napkin into paper and borrowed a ballpoint pen from Edwina ("They're nice for note-taking in the library; that way, I don't leave great big ink spots in the library books. Madame Pince always has such a cow when that happens."), and was making some lists for her group. "We've got one warrior goddess, one siren, one puffskein, one goose, one lynx, and one liger. Three magical creatures, one waterfowl, and two carnivore felines. Except for Pansy, we'd all be able to hold off Theodore if he goes after any guys, but Pansy would be the most useful because she's the only one who can swim and fly for help, if needed. Theodore is disturbed because he's not gay, Edwina thinks it's absolutely disgusting to like eating boogies, I find my chainmail bikini to be too drafty for October, and Lisa and Sally-Anne both prefer their steaks well-done, and this craving for rare meat makes them nauseous. But can we say anything positive about each other?" She looked expectedly at her companions after she drew a line on the paper.

"Puffskeins are cute," Sally-Anne suggested. Hermione wrote that down. "And I wish I could look as good as you in a bikini, whether or not it's chainmail and leather. You fill it out very nicely, Hermione."

Theodore finally smiled. "I agree! Hey, why aren't you writing that down?"

"Because I refuse to give in to something so superficial as to how well I fill out my bikini!" Hermione's face was a deep red color.

"Can I just say those are killer stilettos?" Pansy asked as she flipped the tablecloth back to look at Hermione's feet. "I've looked everywhere for boots like that, but none of them fit my thick calves."

"Face it," Theodore told Hermione as she and the ballpoint pen twitched, "you're kind of stuck with the whole fashion scene." He reached out and combed a brazen hand through her hair. "Too bad your curse doesn't do anything for your atrocious hair."

"Watch it, Nott. I've still know how to use my sword."

Theodore gave the claymore a hard look, and then smiled smugly. "And here I thought you were just happy to see me."

oOoOoOo

"Why do you get to fly?" Harry resentfully asked Ernie MacMillon when Ernie announced he had fallen into the Spring of the Drowned Golden Eagle. Ernie rolled his eyes and reached across Harry to grab the cream in front of Blaise.

"Because a certain emu-who-shall-remain-nameless knocked me into the spring." Ernie waited just long enough for Harry's face to turn red and for Harry to sink low in his chair before adding, "Just kidding, hah!" He ducked under Harry's mock swing and dribbled some cream into his new cup of tea.

"I think it's funny," Michael said, "that Professor Dumbledore thought it was a brilliant idea to stick two birds in the same group as a large cat. What if she gets hungry?"

"I hope she gets hungry," Blaise muttered darkly.

"Don't worry," Daphne replied dismissively, "I think I'd go for the largest supply of meat." She turned her head and stared unblinking at Michael's ear.

"Are we done with our soul-baring?" Harry asked plaintively.

They looked around at the others. "We should probably wait for the end of the hour," Ernie replied as he cast the Tempus Charm. "Eleven minutes. So, let's acquaint one another with who we are, rather than just what. I like Potions and Charms, but Transfiguration seems to be one of my worst subjects. How about you?" He looked expectedly at Michael.

Michael's expression turned sour. "Do we have to?"

Ernie kicked him under the table this time.

oOoOoOo

"I fell into the Spring of the Drowned Wolverine." Neville waited until the murmuring between the others was finished. "I haven't noticed any interests in bright or shiny objects," he could feel the slight twitching from Draco seated beside him, despite the full body-binding charm that McGonagall had ruthlessly cast on the Slytherin to prevent any more untoward escapes, "and I'm not naturally a very curious creature. However, I am also quite vicious and rather tough, and I appreciate being so."

"Oh, Neville." Mandy waved away his words. "I've always thought you were tough." Neville felt something run up along the side of his leg, and then quickly shoved his seat over when he realized that Mandy was playing footsy with him. His entire face burned bright red in embarrassment.

Seamus, not noticing Neville's discomfort, reached around Mandy to poke Draco in the cheek. "Hah! He can't do anything about this!" Draco muttered something deep in his throat that sounded quite like something that would have had McGonagall spitting furballs. "Say, Malfoy here hasn't has his turn yet!" Seamus declared with wicked glee. "Aren't ferrets supposed to be curious creatures, themselves?"

"I wanna try!" Mandy reached over and played with a lock of pale blond hair that hung beside Draco's ear. He managed to twitch, even despite the charm. Neville watched as Draco's face turned bright red.

"You guys, I don't think-" Neville's attempt to salvage the situation was thwarted by Umbridge flouncing back to the teachers' table and making a loud announcement.

"Time's up! You'll all be receiving messages in the future of the next time and location of your group's meeting if you can't decide for yourselves. Talk amongst yourselves to decide if you'd like a teacher present, otherwise you can self-monitor like a study group." Umbridge and McGonagall made their way to the doors and opened them. Neville watched as the other students, some still talking to each other, all stood and departed. Hermione was still scribbling away on her notepad and nodding her head to what Theodore and Edwina said. All of his tablemates also stood and threaded through the students, latching on to their friends and Housemates. Seamus instantly claimed a spot at Ron's side and proceeded to argue with Vincent and Selene.

Neville and Draco were soon the only two students left in the room. Neville looked at Draco. Draco glared a hole in the table. With a sigh, Neville pointed his wand at Draco. "Finite incantum."

Draco relaxed limply in his chair, face still red. He silently gritted his teeth. Neville pushed Draco's wand toward him across the tabletop. Draco snatched it up as if he expected Neville to take it back, and stood so hurriedly that he knocked a hipbone loudly against the tabletop. He hurriedly sat back down again with a pained grunt.

Neville pretended not to see. "I won't inflict the question of what nice thing you can say about your curse," he began.

"I wouldn't dignify it with a response anyway! Whose bright idea was it to stick me with a bunch of kleptomaniacs?" Draco demanded hotly. "None of them have the common sense of a wilted dandelion and I refuse to be seen with the lot of you! I'm not going to any bloody group therapy even if it kills me! In fact, it probably would." Draco sat and sulked thereafter, his arms crossed before his chest and his face sullen.

Neville looked at the tabletop. It's a nice grain for maple, he thought.

They were both silent for a while, and then Draco said, "It's rather funny that a clumsy oaf of a Gryffindor like you would be the most tolerable at this table." Neville recognized a half-hearted and twisted compliment when he heard it. "How did you manage to survive this?"

Neville shrugged. "Times like these, I just mentally retreat to my own little happy place."

A horrified look crossed Draco's face. "You're as nutty as the rest of them."

Upcoming chapter preview

Snape returned to his seat in a matter of moments, carefully balancing a large bowl of sloshing liquid. He gave Harry a critical glare before casting a warming charm on the bowl and then placing it in Harry's lap. Some of the liquid splashed over the bowl's side and onto Harry's robes, but he ignored that in favor of Snape brusquely removing the towel and forcing Harry's hand to submerge in the liquid. "I'm surprised you haven't told Professor McGonagall."

Harry sighed as the liquid soothed the fire that seemed to burn in his hand. "She knows."

Snape stared at Harry so long and hard that Harry felt himself hunching down from embarrassment in his chair. "Really?" Snape drawled. "If your Head of House knew that Umbridge was using a Blood Quill on the students then Umbridge's body would have gone missing days before the Jusenkyo Fiasco." He glared at Harry then, as if it was truly Harry's fault that everyone was cursed by way of not giving McGonagall a reason to bury Umbridge in a hole so deep that even Voldemort himself could never detect it.

Minnionette: Ahah! I know - I shall do a song and dance routine for my readers!

Roommate: Try a tried-and-true formula. Have you tried slash?

Minnionette: I'm sure that Draco will eventually lose his mind and go on a gruesome killing spree in which others like Mandy Brocklehurst will find themselves disemboweled with a dull spoon and Hermione's knitting needles-

Roommate: I said slash, Minni, not slasher.

Minnionette: ... You do realise this whole story started because I couldn't hear the difference between emo and emu, right? Although there will be slash, or at least gay people, because not everyone is heterosexual in my stories, and I'm not really all that big on romance.

(8/19/09) YOUR FRIENDLY PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT

Someone recently sent me a PM about how disgustedly racist I was, since Blaise Zabini is supposed to be black in the books and then I made him fall into Spring of the Drowned Orangutan. It took me several long minutes to figure out what that person meant by being racist. Honestly, the connections never occurred to me! D: I always knew that Blaise was going to be in Harry's group therapy, and I needed someone with opposable thumbs (I suppose I could have made him a koala), and I was also thinking of the Librarian from Terry Pratchett's Unseen University, who is one of my favorite fictional characters of all time.

I extend my deepest apologies to any and all I might have offended, and know that I don't mean it in the least.

And now I'll just go and slink off in shame while I think about what I've done.