A/N: Sorry about the wait. I was with my brothers and had no time to write!

Disclaimer: Chief Derek was fun. Key word "was". I now really want down and dirty surgeon back with his ferryboat scrub cap!

***

In life, everyone has breaking point, a point at which you can't take it anymore. This was hers. A full week and no OR time. Not one simple procedure. Right now she'd kill for a shunt even. So it was decided. She was going to take Derek's offer and move to Seattle because for an attending surgeon, a week and no OR time was torture. And because just being away for too weeks, she missed her best friend.

"I'm bored," a leggy redhead sighed, flopping down on Meredith's couch. "I haven't had one patient today. Not one."

"Yeah I haven't had a surgical patient in a week. I win."

"You do kinda win," Addison nodded. They were silent, just basking in the quietness of practice life.

"I'm moving to Seattle," blurted Meredith uncontrollably.

"What?" she exclaimed. Since Derek's rapid departure and her joining the practice, Addison had became her good friend. On days she missed Derek or was completely conflicted about her feelings, Addison would take her out, get her drunk and find some unsuspecting man for her to go home with.

"I was offered an attending position at Seattle Grace," she stated, crossing one leg over the other.

"Mer, I know you're not that happy here but, not move across the country unhappy."

"Neither did I," she admitted. "A week Addie. A week and I haven't been near an OR…and I miss him. When I'm here I miss him. And to decide what I want to do, I think I need to be there."

"I get it," nodded Addison whose pager began to buzz. "Drinks tonight?" she called as she walked towards the door.

"Sure," Meredith sighed, figuring she needed a drink.

***

Meredith sat silently on the couch, watching the fish as they swam through the rocks. "Are you just going to sit there?" Dr. Gold asked softly. Meredith didn't answer but continued to stare blankly at the fish. "Anything?"

"I'm moving to Seattle," mumbled Meredith.

"You decided this…?"

"Yesterday," she whispered.

"Can I ask why?"

"I'm leaning into the fear to get my happy ending," she said simply, satisfying the physiatrist's curiosity.

"Are you going to tell him?" Dr. Gold questioned.

There was no response. Truthfully, she didn't know whether or not she'd tell him. He seemed happy, enough, with Rose. Or she seemed blissfully happy. But he probably loved her as his best friend. It made the most sense. "No…not yet," Meredith finally responded.

"Then what was with the 'leaning into the fear to get a happy ending' crap?"

"Crap? You're the one who mentioned it first!"

"Yeah but you're missing the point of it. I meant it originally in terms of Derek. You're scared Meredith. I've told you this before but you are scared," told her Dr. Gold. "You need to embrace that fear, lean into it, because the only thing there is to fear is fear itself. Once you jump, you will land. And it'll be like nothing you ever experienced before."

"I know I need to but…I can't."

"You can. Meredith, when I first met with you, two years ago, you wouldn't have even moved for the chance. You've grown. You can do this. Of this, I am sure."

"Thank you for the vote of confidence," smiled Meredith.

"Our session is over but, I'd like you to meet with me once more before you leave. And if you wish to continue therapy, I can refer you to Dr. Wyatt at Seattle Grace. I think you should but that is something we can discuss next session."

Meredith nodded and walked out the door, feeling a draft from the lobby.

***

Meredith once again sat in her office, staring out to the New York skyline. She sighed. Like the last time she called Derek about going to Seattle, she felt a pang of nervousness. This was a big step, huge. She was moving across the country. It wasn't like moving practices, she was actually moving to the west coast.

Seattle was much different than New York. In New York there was never a peaceful moment. Until about 12am there was bustling traffic, pedestrian and motor. Sometimes Meredith would just stare out the window, watching the peace of the streets. Seattle always looked like that. There was nothing. But, her best friend was there. And that was good.

Picking up her phone, Meredith quickly punched in Derek's speed dial number. The ringing stopped and he picked up.

"You've reached the mental hospital. To be admitted press…"

"Shut the hell up Derek," she giggled.

He laughed. "Hi Mer."

"Hi…"

"You want to tell me something?" he asked knowingly.

"Why do you know me so well," sighed Meredith.

"Spill it Mer."

"I want the job," she stated.

"What?!" Derek exclaimed excitedly.

"I want to be an attending at Seattle Grace."

"Mer that's amazing!" he smiled. "When can you start?"

"I just have to find a replacement for the practice, pack up my stuff, actually move, find an apartment… crap. That's a lot to do," she breathed.

"So…it could take a while."

"Give me three weeks," said Meredith positively.

"You sure? You can take more. That's a lot to do in three weeks…"

"I want to cut Derek!" she exclaimed. "I haven't cut in a freaking week…and this isn't the first time this has happened. I want to cut!"

Derek laughed, to anyone else she'd seem like a creepy scalpel hungry serial killer but he knew better. Meredith Grey was a surgeon. That was all. "Fine. Three weeks."

"Three weeks," repeated Meredith with a smile.

"When do you think you'll come out here?"

"Probably like two weeks," she said skeptically.

"Can't wait," he smiled.

"Me neither."

"I'll talk to you later?"

"Yup…probably tomorrow."

"Ok, when you get here we'll set up a meeting with the chief to arrange your contract but I'll informally inform him of your decision," Derek told her professionally.

"Ok."

"Bye Mer."

"Bye Der."

She hung up the phone, resting it in her purse.

"Hey," Addison smiled, peeking her head through the door.

"Hey. Drinking time?"

"Definitely drinking time," she nodded. Meredith grabbed her coat, sliding it over her arms and following Addison out the door. They walked over to a local bar that they were frequent patrons of.

"I need to get laid," groaned Addison.

"What about that one?" Meredith asked, discreetly pointing to a blonde in the corner. "He looks fuck-worthy."

"He just looks arrogant. You're out of practice at this Grey," she sighed. "I miss the Meredith who could spot a clunker from a fucker!"

Meredith laughed. "I'm distracted…and out of practice. Find one yourself then!"

Looking around Addison frowned at the slim pickings until she saw one brunette sticking out of the crowd. "Ooh that one," she pointed at the well-built man.

"Hot. Go for it."

"You'll be okay alone here?" asked Addison.

"Fine," she smiled. "Go, go!"

Addison walked away, confidently leaving Meredith to her tequila. "Hi," a guy said sitting next to her. She took a shot of her tequila.

"You're ignoring me," he accused.

"Trying to."

"Why is that?" he asked sweetly.

"Uninterested," shrugged Meredith.

The guy walked away crestfallen. She didn't understand why men would always walk away so sadly when there was plenty of other 'hot ass' around the bar. Seeing Addison conversing with the brunette, Meredith decided she could take her leave and go home to start on the list of things she had to do.