Naruto felt fogged, like he was underwater. Everything was disjointed; random events strung together like glass beads on a wire. One minute he was on the wall, the next he was leaping through Konoha's sleeping streets with a feral grace he hadn't thought he possessed; hadn't known he possessed.

Possessed...Yes. He had it now. That was what was going on. Naruto realized with a twisting rush of adrenaline and dread that the Kyuubi was primed to emerge. It wanted-no, it didn't want vengeance. There was nothing to avenge itself upon. It was drawing on his own desire for answers, feeding, because it was so hungry hungry hungry hungry HUNGRY FEED ME NOW-

Naruto stopped dead, catching himself as he fell and landing in a crouch, sitting frog-style. Augh! Why now? I can't stop it now; not when I want to fall open and let everything out-

But he couldn't. He just…couldn't let that happen. If he just let go like that, he'd end up-

Just.

Like.

Her.

Naruto snapped his head up sharply, lucidity returning. Sweeping his gaze around his surroundings rapidly, it took a moment for his location to register. Everything was still coming in bits and pieces, synapses firing erratically, pulse jumping. Ah. The training grounds.

With a soft shhhhhfffttt-fff he let himself fall backward into the grass, looking up at the sky. Deep, serene midnight-blue-No, he thought wryly, freaking-out-two-am-suicide-blue. Naruto spread out his arms, a human star. Yeah, suicide blue. Because there's no such thing as okay. He pulled at the blades of grass, grasping handfuls and ripping. Holding his arms out above him, he let the flora flutter down to rest on his face, like he had when he was younger. Fittingly so, for in that moment he felt young again; lost, floating in a dark haze with no way out.

And this time, he thought, there's no Sasuke to pull you out. Sighing, he closed his eyes. There's no Sakura. Naruto opened his eyes, wishing he could see himself. Maybe if he saw his own face, he could ascertain what he felt.

He simply lay there, breathing.

In the end, they both left.

In.

So what do I do now?

Out.

There's only me again.

In.

No, first I'm finishing this.

Out.

That note, in my pocket.

In.

I'm going to finish this, so I can burn it with no regrets.

Out.

Because I'm never going to be like Sakura.

In.

I've seen what happens now.

Out.

And I can't.

In.

I have to burn it.

Out.

No regrets.

In.

Naruto squeezed his eyes shut tightly, so that the insides of his eyelids blossomed red and blue where the stars were. They faded as fat globules slid down his face, streaking along his temples and nestling into the glass like so many glass eggs. He was wearing thin, eroding away. He was going to finish this before it finished him, so help me, or I will die trying.

Because he couldn't just take it, not any longer. Watching them go, one by one. So different, but somehow the same. And, oh gods, it scared the living hell out of me. I don't know how I'll-we'll-make it out of this one and still hold everything together. I don't know how we'll make it out of this one because there was no more 'we'. Not anymore. The 'we' became 'us', just me and Sakura-chan. And now it's just me, and he was all alone, just like that.

Naruto snapped his eyes open, one more time, rebelling against the fuzzy feeling, the ache behind his eyes. Yeah, I know. He smiled, even though it hurt so, so, so badly, right in the pit of his stomach and the left side of his chest. Suicide blue.

And out, one more time.