Always on my mind
Chapter 7
The Fear
Syaoran stared at his cell phone biting the tip of his thumb. He ran a hand through his hair then stood up to look outside the window. The snow storm seemed to be getting worse and he worried that perhaps Sakura was stranded somewhere in the cold. She had been gone for four hours to tell her fiancé she was leaving him so that he could be with her. There had been no word from her and she was not answering his calls. He grew weary and tried not to consider the possibility that she was still with Ryu…even worse, that she decided not leave him for some virtuous reason.
He decided to crawl into his bed and be miserable there as he waited for that important call or text. As he lay there with is back hunched and his eyes staring at the ceiling, he became heartbroken for some reason. His mind could not fathom why she was not accepting his calls.
"She choose you Syaoran." He told himself. He knew he would not sleep that night. He was worried about her, he was worried for himself. He was worried about his being because he did not know what he would do if she was no longer a part of his life.
That morning, after a sleepless night and not a word from Sakura, he called Chiharu. The only person he knew who was friends with Sakura. It him momentarily how much of a secret their love had been. There was no one in the world who could testify that there was something between them.
The phone rang and his heart beat as he walked across the kitchen. He clenched his fist then unclenched it. He was not fond of Chiharu because he found her to be too talkative and too charismatic. He imagined that new of this phone call would be latest office gossip.
"Hello!" She said in a cheerily voice that made him cringe. He was miserable and was not in the mood for cheerful formalities.
"It's Syaoran." He said certain that she did not have his number saved in her phone.
"Oh, Mr. Li. Well this is a surprise. Are you looking for Sakura?"
"Yes." He said impatiently.
"She is in the hospital…did you know." Chiharu was calm as she spoke and sounded pre-occupied.
Syaorans heart sank in the pit of his stomach "Hospital? What happened to her?"
"She fell down a long flight of stairs. Apparently. She was getting married…to the CEO? Can you believe that? The CEO is her fiancé…I was not even invited to the wedding. You think you know people…I suppose it's not her fault."
Syaoran could feel his eyes get misty and he did not want to shout at Chiharu who was still talking, now telling Syaoran about her own wedding day.
"Chiharu." Syaoran interrupted her "Tell me what happened to Sakura."
"Oh yes, Sakura. I'm sorry. Apparently she is alright. Just fractured her leg, her hand and neck. She has to wear a neck brace."
He took a deep breath, he felt worried and slightly relieved. He will think about the wedding later. He mind was not ready to tackle all of the information at once.
"Which hospital is she at?"
"Shinjuku Private Hospital, you know it? Rich people go there when they get sick. That CEO fiancé of hers must be loaded."
"I know it." He said running to his room to search for a jacket and shoes.
"I'm going later this afternoon. I couldn't get them to let me leave work early this morning. How insensitive is that? Our colleague is in the hospital and they won't let us leave, at least you are fired. I get this strange feeling you are in love with her?"
Syaoran had stopped listening to her awhile back.
"Are you in love with her?" Chiharu yelled.
"Yes." Syaoran said. It felt good to finally tell someone even though it was Chiharu.
"Wow, well…you better do yourself a favour and get over her."
Syaoran ended the call annoyed. He grabbed a leather jacket and keys and started his way out of the building.
He did not know what he would do when he reached the hospital. There was a huge possibility that Ryu was there overseeing things. He imagined a crowd of people who meant the world to Sakura but nothing to him waiting for her to wake up.
As soon as he found a parking spot he ran into the building. He kept walking straight, his brain was on shut down and his heart kept his bod going.
"Sir!" A voice yelled out.
It was the receptionist. A plump lady with a beautiful face. Her cheeks were rosy and she wore crimson lipstick. Syaoran stopped in his tracks and turned to look at her.
"You just can't walk through." She said "You need to talk to me first."
"Right. Of course." Syaoran snapped out of it. "I'm here to see Sakura." He shook his head "I mean Kinomoto Sakura? Is she here?"
The lady raised her eyebrows "You mean the young lady who fell down a flight of stairs in a wedding dress."
"Yes." He said quickly.
"Are you family?"
Syaoran looked at the woman carefully and hesitated "No."
"Well, you can't see her."
"I'm a close friend." He retaliated.
She took a deep breath "I don't want to a Bitch but its hospital policy. You are a good looking man. I trust you. But it is strictly family…unless her next of kin says its okay."
"Who is her next of kin?" Syaoran knew the answer.
"Mr. Ryuki…his family funds the hospital you know. It's such a long morning. This place is flooding with patients of all sorts. What's your name anyway? If you want we can do lunch later."
It felt like chatting to Chiharu all over again. A conversation loaded with more useless information than useful to him. He was pretty sure he was explicitly being invited to flirt.
He straightened his back "Can I talk to Mr. Ryuki?"
"I'll ask someone to call him for you." The woman winked as though this was a scandalous favour "Because you are so pretty."
Syaoran nodded. He did not smile of gesture that he was thankful. His disposition went above her. She failed to read the sadness in his eyes, the trembling in his hands and how descended his eyebrows remained throughout the conversation.
"You can wait there." She pointed at a couch by a window with her pen.
He moved slowly to it and sat down. At least the snow storm was over and there was a small ray of sunlight that he failed to fully appreciate.
"What are you doing here?" Ryu's voice sounded off a short distance from him.
He raised his head. The man was in a suite. He looked tired and angry.
"I'm here to see Sakura. Is she alright." Syaoran tried to sound calm and friendly.
"You can't see her."
Syaoran raised an eyebrow "Is she alright? Is she awake?" He asked trying to keep himself composed despite how angry the mere presence of Ryu made him feel.
"What are you doing here? You have no business here…you are just her colleague."
Syaoan figured then that Ryu and Sakura were still engaged.
"We are good friends…you can ask anyone from our department." He said defensively.
"I don't want you here again! Or anywhere near her." Ryu said in an angry whisper.
Syaoran sighed "Are you serious?"
"Yes I am serious. When Sakura wakes up we are going to marry. We have been together for over a year and I don't know what you want or expect. You are nothing but an accountant."
Syaoran's eyebrows shot up and he was more humoured than angered now. He laughed then said "Woah…where is all this coming from."
"Don't play me for a fool. I know you love her. I've seen you look at her during work meetings."
"So you are threatened by me." Syaoran said "I am just an accountant…remember."
"Fuck you." Ryu said in a hostile tone. His blue eyes shot out at Syaoran who kept a smug look on his face.
Ryu started walking away "You will never see her again. I'll see to it."
As he watched Ryu's back Syaoran feel heat in his veins. He said aloud immediately guarding Ryu's full attention. "I don't need to know you to know that you are an asshole. You and I are very different because I would never treat her like shit. I know she's your fiancé. I also know that you absolutely do not deserve her, even remotely. You are only with her to prove that you are not the most selfish person in the West fucking hemisphere. Sakura is not some tool for you to stroke your ego with. She is a beautiful, fully-formed woman. Dazzling in her complexity, maddening in her mystery and you underestimate her every fucking day and because of that you will never make her truly happy."
The receptionist watched Syaoran with amazement and she fell in love.
"You don't know what you are talking about."
"She has feelings for me…did you know that? Did you know she was in my bed last night?"
Syaoran staggered back when Ryu slammed his fist into Syaorans face. Syaoran bent back and felt his knuckles swish past his nose. Ryu shook his fist and winced.
Syaoran touched the blood that came out from his nose before throwing a punch at Ryu. He missed and Ryu grabbed the collar of Syaoran's shirt and slammed him against the wall and punched him through the stomach with his other hand. Syaoran was surprised Ryu's strength. He took in the blow and pushed Ryu away and managed to get in a punch.
The receptionist was screaming hysterically and called security.
Syaoran and Ryu were on the floor suddenly. Ryu was on top of Syaoran choking him angrily "I'm going to kill you." He repeated himself through clenched jaws. The security guards came through and tore Ryu from Syaoran, possibly saving his life. Syaoran was convinced that Ryu was capable of murder.
He stood up and took a deep breath before going into a short coughing fit. Blood was trickling over his lips and dripping on his clothes.
Ryu was still in rage as the security guard held him back.
"Get this man out of here. He is an imposter. Make sure he does not come here again. You hear me?! You will never see her again!"
….
Sakura slowly opened her eyes. He joints felt stiff, her mouth tasted like medicine and she could feel pain in her neck. She looked around the room. She was not in her bedroom. Perhaps she was dreaming. She blinked hard as memories came back to her. She had fallen down a flight of stairs in a beautiful wedding gown. She was about to get married to a man she was sure she did not love. At the time she was plotting ways to escape the ordeal.
She tried to speak but her voice did not come to her. Tears escaped the corner of her eyes. She was wearing a neck brace. Her hand and legs were in a cast. She tried to sit up but could not move. She wiggled her fingers and toes…and for a moment she felt alive.
Fear overcame her and she wanted to tell someone she was awake. There were flowers in her room. The television was on but on mute. There was a painting of the wall of sunflowers.
Her thoughts went to Syaoran and more tears fell down her cheeks. She never told him she loved him…she was still engaged to Ryu. Did he know what had happen to her? Did he come visit her? Was he furious when he found out that she was in a wedding dress at her wedding when the accident happened? Was he heartbroken? Did he think she had forgotten or abandoned him?
The door finally opened. Sakura desperately it was Syaoran. He would kiss her with the passion and zest he always gave her. He would carry her off the bed and they would walk through the hospital hallways with all eyes on them.
However, it was her brother who came through the door with her father behind him. Sakura was still relieved and happy to see them.
They smiled and Touya said "She is awake."
"How are you feeling?" He father asked.
Sakura could not speak. The pain in her neck somewhat felt worse.
"You'll be able to speak soon." Touya said. He stood next to her and kissed her forehead "You scared us Kaiju. You scared the hell out of us."
They spoke to her and told her what the doctors were saying. She would need physical therapy. They said she would be back to normal in a months. Her neck injury could have been worse but it was minor. She would need to be on a wheelchair for a week and someone should take care of her. The doctor said the injuries were not so bad but to Sakura, this sounded horrible.
Ryu came to see her after. They were alone. Ryu's face looked beaten up. There was a fresh scar on his lip. Sakura could not speak or ask. He caressed her check and kissed her lips. Sakura could not turn her face away to break the kiss.
"I'm thinking we move to Osaka." He said. "My parents have an estate there. We can get a live in physical therapist. You don't have to worry. You will be back on your feet soon."
Sakura wanted to say no but she could not. She looked at his with eyes she wanted him to read but he failed to look at her. It was as though she had done something wrong and he was accepting it. He did not want to let her go. He made it clear. He touched her fingers and tears came to his eyes when he said "I know I'm impossible. Arrogant."
He looked at his fingers.
He stood up and took off the jacket.
"There is a reason I asked you to be my wife. It was not because my family wanted me to marry if I want to keep my inheritance…"
He paused and walked out the window.
"Initially, yes. My intentions were not good. But I do…I do love you and I hope deep down you believe that." His adams apple vibrated as he spoke.
Sakura closed her eyes. She hated that she was mute. She felt sympathy for Ryu for the first time. She understood him better…but she did not love him. Not in the way a wife should love their husband.
…..
A week passed and she had seen everyone but Syaoran. She looked at her cell phone to find it was formatted. Someone had been tampering with her phone. She did not want to imagine that Ryu was the one who did it.
She could speak now but failed every time to tell Ryu that she wanted to leave him. Despite the fact that she was the one in the hospital bed, he was more tragic. He brought her flowers. He made sure her needs were met. He called her friends to come see her including Chiharu who was here for the second time.
Chiharu was changing the channels on the tv "So when can you go home."
"Next week." Sakura said.
"That's good? Are you coming back to work?"
Sakura shook her head "I don't know. There are many things I need to think about."
"Did Syaoran visit you?" Chiharu looked at her for a moment.
Sakura felt her eyes get misty at the mention of Syaoran. "No." She said.
She wanted to coil into a ball and cry. She missed him, horribly.
"That's weird. He seemed so keen to see you when he heard you were here."
"He did?" Sakura asked.
"Yea. He like you. Did you know?"
Sakura did not say anything.
"Did you know he likes you?"
Sakura still said nothing. Instead she tried to shift her body and said "What did he say."
"He was worried about you. He said he was going to come see you. Maybe he changed his mind. Maybe he realised that you belong to someone else." The thought of that worried Sakaura.
"Well, I told him to get over you." She said proudly as though she deserved a friend of the year award "Yes, he is attractive…he is. Even I've had fantasies about him. But he is one of those men."
Sakura wanted Chiharu to leave. She wanted to ask her if she could use her phone to call Syaoran but held back. What would she tell him? Why was he not with her?
….
Syaoran sat in the parking lot and stared at the hospital doors. It had been a tiresome week of sleepless night and failed attempts to get through the doors. He asked Chiharu to send a message to Sakura. Chiharu was not pleased with the request and asked him to let Sakura be. The security guards knew him now and warned him not to park there. He was not going to let Ryu win. He missed Sakura horribly. He was unemployed and it looked like he was losing the girl. He almost felt like a creep, sitting in his car waiting for a window of opportunity. He had junk food in the passenger seat and sat back waiting for something to happen.
Suddenly it did, the doors opened and he saw Sakura. He sat up, his lips slightly parted at the sight of her. She was on a wheelchair and Ryu was pushing her when a car appeared to get them. Syaoran squinted his eyes and wished he was closer. He wished he could see her face. He wondered if she was content.
"Did Ryu just win?" He muttered to himself still looking at them.
…..
To be continued
A/N: Thank you so much for the reviews, motivation's and request for more chapters. I will make sure I finish the story.