Hey my friends :-)

Chapter seven! It took me so long to write it, I'm very sorry. I also know that this might not be the best one, since it's very hard for me to write fluent conversations. But I hope you like it anyway.

I really love Peeta. He's such a great character. I wished I would meet someone like him, too. Boys out there, you will have it hard from now on! Because most of the girls out there might compare you now to Peeta. It's like a Peeta-scale. If you get a 10, you're Peeta! If you get 1, you might be Cray.

Anyway, just enjoy the next chapter. I'd be glad if you left a review behind, I wonder how you think the story will go on.

Peeta POV!

Chapter 7: Just one small finger

Four days passed and nothing really noteworthy happened. Katniss refused to talk to me most of the time and she pretended to not listening to me at all. Howewer I had realized soon enough that she just had put up a big front; every time when I told her something about Primrose, her fingers would start to twitch slightly. I retold her the story of how Prim got her goat, Lady. I remembered how we laid in the cave one year ago, when she said the very same words to me. I hoped she would remember something, but it turned out that her torturers even got hold of this memory. Once again she accused me to be a filthy liar and I knew that there was no need for me to deepen that bad impression, so I stopped.

I knew that Katniss never felt save, even when I was tied to my chair and unable to reach her. I terrified her and I'm sure that it must have been a real torture for her having me around. Torturing her was the last thing I wanted to do, but Dr. Sundower told me that it was necessary. This treatment was called "flooding" that is a form of behavior therapy, based on the principles of respondent conditioning. It was used to treat phobia and anxiety disorders and worked by exposing the patient to their painful memories; me.

We hoped that she would get used to me, so that I could go into her room without being detained by fetters. When we tried this, unfortunately, we had to find out that she was not ready for this step. As soon as I got into her room she started yelling at me, cursing, and in the end even crying. Before I could manage to get out of her sight, she completely broke down. Sundower told me that she had suffered a serious seizure so I wasn't allowed to meet her for whole two days.

I guess it wasn't easy for both of us. I really hurt Katniss when I was around her and she hurts me by not wanting me to. She bruised me – I bruised her. I couldn't stand that thought.

Sundower and I would sit together often, discussing our next steps. Elizabeth Rockwell would join us sometimes, but most of the time she was just too busy and spent her time with other patients like Johanna and Annie. I've visited Johanna only twice. She told me about the torture in the Capitol, how they had beaten her, Katniss and Annie up, how they let them starve and how they never let them sleep. This was the worst part of all.

"And one day they came and took Katniss away. She never returned after this so I figured that they had killed her accidentally." she had told me. "I only knew days later that she was still alive, as I heard some peacekeepers talk 'bout the Girl on Fire and her 'progress'. That's all."

We now all knew the meaning behind their words.
Snow weakened her body before he attacked her mind. They've planned it, those bastards.

I've never visited Annie since I haven't met her before. I knew she was Finnick's girl and I thought it's better to wait until he would decide to introduce us. All I knew about her was that she was the victor of the 70th annual Hunger Games and went insane in the process. If she had been treated as bad as Johanna and Katniss had been, I was sure that she must have been in a horrible state. Therefore as soon as Finnick was allowed to see her, he stopped coming over to see me completely. I wasn't offended by this, since I knew he would be spending every second possible by her side. Frankly speaking I envied him. Annie hadn't been hijacked, she recognized Finnick and she did not fear him. That's all I could wish for by now.

These days I got in a serious argument with Coin and Plutarch. Since the Mockingjay's disabled, like they called it, they were in need of a new face for the rebellion. It's not hard to come to the conclusion that I was their first choice. I didn't believe that it was even possible to just switch from one face, one symbol to another, but I had really underestimated their inventive talent.

"We want te people to know what happened to your wife. How the Capitol has destroyed her and how both of you are trying to recover now. I want you to tell the people out there to fight for their loved ones, before the Capitol takes them away." Coin told me with a keen smirk. I was sure she was happy to work with me instead of Katniss, since I was good with words and had my own ways to convince everybody of my convictions. I was the perfect man for her.

But I hated the way she looked at me and tried to use me as well as Katniss for her plans. I refused to help them first, but they promised me to do everything in their might to ensure Katniss' life, no matter how she turned out. It wasn't enough for me, I neither wanted to be used nor stir up a war against the Capitol which would take a lot of innocent lives. But if I did refuse their request, they would stop treating Katniss in an instant, so I didn't have a choice, did I?

We discussed for two days, the days I wasn't allowed to meet Katniss anyway. So after my involuntary absence, Coin had me to shoot my first propo. They had put Katnis to sleep so I could go and touch her freely while filming or so they say. They let me free her from all her fetters which had to be hided under the blanket, so no one would see it.

The really ridiculous thing was that they even got a prep team for Katniss, to style her and paint fake bruises on her entire body. It made me sick, but I didn't step in as I knew that Coin would be displeased if I did. And I didn't want to make her angry since I – unfortunately – was dependent on her assistance and subject to her strict regulations. However, when one of those guys even suggested parching a small part of her hair to make her look more authentic, I couldn't hold off myself. I grabbed him by the scruff of his neck and threw him out immediately.

Who do they think they are?

At least the camera team seemed to be nice. Cressida, the director, seemed to be a nice and friendly woman. She even complained when she eyed the prep team's doing.

"What the hell is this?" she asked and pointed to Katniss' lower lip. It looked like it was split and bloody.

"That girl's been here for weeks! Why do they think she would look like that? Are they serious?"

It looked like it was us who had beaten her to pulp. We had no choice but to pretend that she had been retrieved just a few hours before. And with this, our plans were changed immediately and I had to realize that this won't be the last propo for me.

I got a bad feeling about being in front of a camera again. Some would say that I had gotten used to it, being a tribute and victor and such, but that's not true. I wonder how Caesar Flickermann did it. He really must be in love with the stage.

Fortunately no one gave me guidelines on what I had to say in the propo. I should do it freely since they trusted in my ability of absorbing every one with my words.

"This is Peeta Mellark, victor of the 74th Hunger Games and survivor of the third Quarter Quell", I began. I sat on my chair next to sleeping Katniss and my eyes only left the camera to connect with her closed ones. Cressida, the person in charge for the filming would ask me some questions sometimes and I tried to answer them without using simple 'yes and no' answers. I talked a lot and I was sure that everything would be cut together as they wanted anyway.

After this I felt exhausted. Really exhausted. So I got back into my room and called it for a night. It was around five o'clock perhaps.

The next day I was called to see Katniss again. Sundower wanted to give it another try. This time, however, he said he wanted me to be 'free but defenseless'. It turned out that he had tied me to my chair again but left my left arm free. Instead of this arm, my shoulder was fettered hard, so I couldn't move a lot. I felt really skeptical. Would Katniss feel safe with this change? Not that she had been feeling safe anyway. I had to be careful.

I was ready and set, and waited for Sundower to let the machines inject her some clear liquid that made her wake from her comatose slumber.
The girl groaned when she came to and I waited for her to adapt to my presence before I spoke up. I was a little scared to meet her again, since the last encounter had ended terribly. When she opened her eyes and saw me sitting beside her, she let out a groan again and rolled her eyes.

"You?" She asked with a cracked voice that went over to a nasty hiss. "Can't you just leave me alone?"

"Good morning to you too, sleepyhead." I answered frowning.

She let out a small snort. "You know, I wouldn't sleep If you assholes would not drug me all the time."

I shrugged.
"We have no other choice. How could I possibly enter your room if you weren't sleeping?" I asked her.

"That's easy. Just don't come." Now it was me who let out a snort.

"I'm sorry, but I won't let you have that."

She went back to keep silent and began staring at the ceiling. She would do it for hours, I knew, but I didn't want her to slip out of our conversation already.

"You know, if I wanted to kill you, I would have done it while you were sleeping. I know you're smart, but when it comes to this…" I grew silent too. Was I acting too cold right now? But my words were true, so what should I have done instead? Surprisingly her eyes flickered back to meet mine, musing.

"Oh, shut up" she began finally, her eyebrows furred in confusion. "I don't know what sick game you're playing, but count me out of it. You seem to be pretty smart too, so why don't you get it that I don't wish to see you? I told you to leave clearly, but all you do is continue to come over and harass me all day. I hate you for this."

"I don't care" I answered. "I just want to be here and definitely won't go before we can have a normal conversation at least."

"This is a normal conversation, asshole! For me, it is! So why won't you go now before I beat the crap out of you!" she hissed, her eyes fighting against mine.

I laughed. "Sure. Sure you will, come on! Hit me, sweetheart" I challenged.

With this, I got her even more upset than I thought I could. Her cheeks burned with anger she literally showed me her teeth.

"You are funny, you know?" I started amused. "Telling me stuff like this, even when I am in advantage right now."

"Oh yeah?" she asked back, "Show me you punk!"

She didn't have to ask me twice. I lifted my left hand and the look on her face dropped immediately.

"You.. You're.." she started and her face grew pale.

I put my hand back in an instant.
"It's only this arm", I tried to calm her, but the look in her eyes showed me that she actually was terrified.

"Don't worry. I won't hurt you. You can trust me. I promise."

Katniss wrinkled her nose in disgust. "Trust you?" she spat.

"Yeah, that's what I promised."

"Oh well. I take promises very seriously…. Then I won't call you names anymore. I promise" She snarled ironically before adding "Asshole."

I laughed. "Really, I won't do anything. Compared to you, I keep my promises, you know?"

"Your word doesn't count. At least not for me." She grumbled gruffly.

I didn't take her for real now; all she did and said was leaving me with a small but genuine smile.
"I will make it count" I whispered softly.

She huffed again and tried to avoid my glance. She hadn't passed out by now, even If I was able to reach for her. I took it as a good sign.

"Hey Katniss", I began again after minutes of silence. She didn't react to my voice and just kept staring holes in the air. It startled me, since I expected her to react to the name. She still hated me calling her Katniss, but I swore I definitely wouldn't start to call her Katarina. I didn't want Snow to win. Never.

Even when I repeated calling her name, she pretended that my voice wouldn't reach her, which surprised me first; but I knew better.
"If you keep ignoring me, I swear, I will show you my left hand again" I dared her. I won this battle because her eyes darted back to me immediately.

"You said ... you promised that you wouldn't…" she croaked. And then she clenched her teeth as if she said something she did not intend to. Her words didn't go unnoticed.

"There I was thinking that you didn't care 'bout promises" I observed. "And by the way, I promised that you could trust me. And I promised to not hurt you. And I didn't. I never would."

She frowned again and her eyes grew darker by the minute. I guessed she remembered something about me, something artificial, but I didn't ask her about it. She looked like she was in an argument within herself. Her fingers began to tremble.

"Are you okay?" I asked her worriedly.

"Do I look like I was?" She hissed, her eyes full of anger. "Look at me and tell me what you think! I am a prisoner, locked into this room, tied to this bed and unable to move. I get drugged permanently, I am toyed around like some lousy guinea pig and get forced to trust liars like you! So, fucking tell me, do I look okay?"

"No, you don't" I told her after I let that girl's words sink. "But you're wrong. I am not here to force you to trust me. I want to gain your trust."

"I can't see the difference." she growls. I was sure she wasn't blind.

"Yes you do. It's here" I said and put my free hand over my heart as I closed my eyes. Of course I couldn't confess my affection towards her again just yet. She would never believe me if I told her. And she would refuse to talk to me forever, it's a fact I couldn't deny. But I wanted to convey her how important she was for me. I would have died for her in a blink if this was required to safe this girl.

"I don't understand" she stated and looked away again.

"You do. I know you do."

It was a dead end. What could I have done to convince her that I didn't mean any harm for her? Talking would not help anymore, I was sure of that. She would just shut everyone out of her little, warped world, where's no possibility to reach her. Not with words though, but actions seem to speak louder than words in this case. What could I possibly lose since I've got nothing anyway?

I gulp.

At least It was worth giving it a try.

"Hey Sweetheart" I asked again and now she listened to me from the start.

Maybe I still had something to lose. Her attention maybe. I could tell she reacted so fast, because she still was scared shitless. She hid it really well behind uncountable layers, but I saw through her. Okay, I admit, she was drenched in cold sweat. This let me see through her mask, but anyway.

"What would you do, if I touched your hand?" I asked her huskily.

Her eyes widened.

"You wouldn't dare to..!" she shrieked and she seemed to freak out any second.

"Then what's the deal?" I asked again. "One finger. Just one, small finger. Why would you be afraid of it?"

"I am not afraid!" She clarified, but we both knew that it was a lie. She had always been a terrible liar anyway, not to speak of her lack of acting talent, and even the Capitol couldn't change this fact.

"Yes you are. Terrified even. So I ask you again. Can I touch you?"

"NO!" She yelped and tried to jump up, but it was impossible thanks to her fetters that hold her back. I felt sorry for her, however, decided to stay grim.

"Why can't I?" I asked her with a firm voice. I wouldn't accept any reason until she told me why she thought that my finger was this dangerous to her.

"I just don't want to!" she exclaimed.

"I am not satisfied with this kind of answer. Are you afraid? Of my pinky?"

She bit on her lower lip. Of course it was only a finger that would leave a small, faint touch on her skin. She didn't want to touch me, obviously, and she didn't want to be touched either. But she clearly had to admit to herself, that my finger was not a threat to her.

"I .. I am not afraid" she got out and to my surprise she actually stuttered. "I just.. I just hate it, being touched."

"When we met in the train, you didn't seem to have problems touching me, though", I noted drily.

"I wanted to murder you; of course I needed to come close."

"Were you afraid?"
She wouldn't answer me for this question. I never got out of her, why she didn't mind touching me back then. I guessed its only reason was the capitols mission engraved into her brain. She seemed to be different this day, too, like she was in trance or something similar. I realized that she tried to go back into the haze of her mind. She tried to blend me out, as if she tried to protect herself against me, so I chose the only option left to bring her back to me.

I touched the back of her hand as soft as I could. It was such a small, innocent contact, but even this crept the hell out of her.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING! " She screamed in pure terror. I tried to not look at her, but I really wanted to.

"Does it hurt?" I asked her absent mindedly, but she didn't get my words. She continued screaming and tried to fight against the gentle touch. She did not break down though, but I had scratched her boundaries for sure.

"Does it hurt?" I repeated; my voice kind and tender. "Katniss, tell me if I hurt you right now. I know you are no liar."

It took her five minutes to calm down, at least. But she eventually did, as her voice was worn out and her energy to struggle was completely exhausted. I did not remove my finger for the entire time and endured her fight. Surprisingly she was the first to raise her voice again.

"It's not your pinky" she coughed weary, unable to even look into my face. I looked down to our hands. I had used my index.

"Sorry… I got a little caught up in… excitement I guess..." I apologized truthfully.
Strangely enough she let out a faint snort.
"And, does it hurt now? It doesn't, right? Like I promised."

"No" She admitted. "But it wasn't painless either."

"Next time, we'll try holding hands" I smiled hopefully.

"Don't you ever dare to, dickhead."

-.-

Finnick found me some time after and led me into the command center. It surprised me a lot that they actually let me enter. This time, however, I couldn't care less. I'd rather stayed at Katniss' to somehow comfort her. This might sound strange, since I only stressed her out… but anyway.

I patted Finnicks shoulder as I walked beside him. He had dark circles under his eyes as if he had never found any sleep since Annie had been saved.

"They want us to see your propo" He explained.

"It's finished already?"
I didn't expect the film crew to be this fast.

"Beetee found a way to put it into the nationwide channel of the Capitol. Everyone will see you. Even that bastard, Snow."
I gulped.

"This is Peeta Mellark, victor of the 74th Hunger Games and survivor of the third Quarter Quell" The boy on the screen began.
It was strange to see me talking in television again. It made me feel like some politician, but I never felt like it was me talking…

My face was pale and I realized that I had the same look like Finnick. Tired. Worn out. Worried. Restless. When have I actually paid attention to myself the last time? No wonder that Katniss thought I was a freak to begin with.

"I am here to tell you, all citizens of Panem, that Katniss and I are alive. We are safe right now and try to reach as many of you as possible."

Then the boy lowered his head to hide his face.

"Sadly I have to inform you, that we made it out of the games together, but we are not okay at all. Katniss Everdeen is not okay. The Capitol got its hands on her and she had been tortured endlessly to weaken the Rebellion" The camera zoomed out, so we all could take a glance at the sleeping girl beside the baker's son. "They have hurt her, drugged her and now she's not able to help us, and not even able to help herself, but she tells us to go on. Katniss did not endure all this pain to just give up. She has too much she cares for."

The boy on the screen stroke over that girl's cheek softly, but was also very careful to not mess with her make up. Only I would know.

"She's here. I am here. And we are not willing to give up. Katniss is fighting now, this very second and I am fighting by her side. So are you. We can't allow them to take our loved ones. Our husbands, our wives, … our children."

He tried to fight the tremble in his voice and continued to speak teary-eyed. This was the first time that Peeta actually thought that he would make a splendid actor. It was cruel of course, but somehow he had to convince everyone that Katniss had lost her and his beloved child, due to the Capitols treatment and the games.

"They took our child. They took my wife. Our Mockingjay may have lost her wings to take her. But they couldn't take her voice. The rebellion is not just about her, about me or about a handful berries. It's about you all. Stand up, and raise your voices! The Mockingjay calls upon you all to stand up and fight against this cruelty. They must learn that their games are over. The Capitol might have taken her, our spark, but not our fire, and it's catching."

The picture showed both, the girl and the boy now. The boy took her hand into his and kissed it with closed eyes. This was no act.

"I will fight. For her, for my dead baby and for my entire family who died in District 12 a few weeks ago. I will fight for all of you. And if you all fight with me, together as one, we will win."

The broadcast stopped a everyone around me started to cheer loudly.

With only one exception.

Me.

How did you like it? :-) I hope Peeta's not out of character too much. It's so hard to convey his genuine character in another language. If you have some ideas or requests for the story, don't hesitate to tell me! I'm very open for suggestions since I'm just writing without any plot in my head :) It's just a good practice.

(Oh, anyway, does anyone of you know the story " A good Wife?", When I read the last chapter, I cried for two hours, because it was the BEST ending I've ever read. I think even Suzanne Collins would not have found a better ending. I'm not exaggerating. I swear!

Thanks to following people for review :) It means a lot to me, thank you so much!

Katpee everlark, girlonfire: Thank you both so much :-) I'll give my best for the next chapters, too!

SheepAmongstWolves12: Be careful with highly addictive stuff sweetheart! Peeta might come and pin you to the bed next. Oh, does that sound suggestive?

MaidenAlice: It will get more intense for the next chapters, I promise :-) (Even if Katniss doesn't trust me.. hopefully you do.)

The black lily 7: Thank you very much :-) I hope you'll enjoy the next chapters, too!

And thanks to LaBella I decided to change the name of the Fanfic a little bit. Thank you also! :D

Please leave me a comment :-) It would be sooo happy about It, really!

Thank you so much, I really love you all!

Elsterbird
(Toast)