Twinsanity Abounds ~ a Steph 'n Ollie story ~ Chapter 7

November 1991

The weeks after that eventful meeting with the Marauders, including the reunion with Harry's mum and dad, took on a pleasant kind of pattern. During the school week, the various members of ASYLUM took their meals together, and the first years of the group continued to partner up with a different person each class, so that even Ron managed to earn a respectable number of house points for Gryffindor. Free periods during the day were spent revising or working on essays, and of course brainstorming future prank ideas with all available members of the group. Hermione, the bookworm, spent a great deal of this free time "encouraging" her friends to concentrate on their studies, and save the prank-planning for when their work was done. Steph, however, reminded her twin at every turn about her favorite quote: "All work and no play makes Mia a dull girl…" –and, actually succeeded in getting her to join in with the rest of them in their brainstorming every once in a while. A good prank, after all, waits for no one.

So far, ASYLUM pulled off several smaller-scale pranks, such as charming an unsuspecting student's ink to turn invisible after exactly one page was written. This was truly a team effort, with Ginny and Mia finding the spells necessary to "fix" the quills, and Fred/George helping with the prep work. In the common room, for example, Steph or Ron would "obtain" a fellow student's quill, hold it behind her/his back, and one of the others would quietly utter the charm. Then they would, quite helpfully, "find" and return said quill – spelled, of course—to their classmate. Sometimes they even loaned an Obliterato quill of their own making to a classmate in need of a quill to finish an essay…usually due to its mysterious disappearance, thanks to Harry's proficiency with "Accio." Naturally, many a student was quite alarmed after noticing that his or her work was gone just seconds after they had finished writing one page, but a simple "Aparecium" whispered in their direction would "magically" bring it back, much to those fretting students' relief.

Thanks to Ron and Hermione, the amount of time their fellow students had to fret or panic was directly proportional to the friendliness they showed to others, so obviously certain students of certain houses (Slytherins, for example) had much more time to feel the stress of the situation. When they would try, sometimes rather frantically, to bring it back with a simple Finite Incantatem, they were always unsuccessful. Thanks to Hermione's brilliant suggestion, with this particular variation of the Obliterato charm, the only way to make the written words reappear was to use the specific countercharm, Aparecium. Otherwise, it would just be too easy to counter with Finite Incantatem. If only Madam Pince knew of the pranking going on in her library…perhaps she would have taken pity and allowed some of the pranked students to remain in her domain after raising the inevitable fuss. Some of those less-than-friendly students had to wait for a professor to help them, but many just started over once again with a new sheet of parchment; the brightest "prankees" also made sure to use new quills and ink to be doubly sure the problem would not reoccur.

{T.A.}

A favorite prank of all male ASYLUM members was presenting specially chosen girls with a Pervius Pansy – adapted from one of Fred & George's early prank ideas. The direct opposite to the "Impervius" charm, a Pervius Pansy, when worn, made the wearer "all wet" by causing the unsuspecting female to perspire profusely. The guys made quite a production of presenting these not-so-innocent flowers; with their charming personalities turned on "High," they frequently caused more than one innocent girl to blush and even fluster a bit under their complimentary attentions. Fred & George were especially good at "doing charming," and Charlie was not far behind them in charm. (There must be something about the "dragon dude's" dashing good looks…he flustered quite a few young ladies! Must be a Weasley thing.)

Not to be outdone, and in the interest of "Equal Opportunity Pranking," Ginny called Steph and Mia into their dormitory for a little impromptu meeting of their own…on her bed with the curtains drawn and a "Muffliato" cast. "Ok girls, we can't let those gits I call my brothers take all the credit for this prank. Who would have thought Ron would cause that 'Claw girl to blush with his charm?"

Mia tried to hide her growing blush, but Steph, of course, noticed and called her on it. "Ooh, Mia likes Ron! Oh look, Ginny, they even blush the same way!"

"Yeah, I think you're right about that…but my brother? Ewww!"

"Oh, I don't know…your brothers can be gits at times, but Charlie is pretty nice to look at," admitted Steph. "But sis, are you MENTAL? Ron? Seriously? You can do so much better than Ron. Sorry, Ginny, no offense."

"No problem - believe me, I'm very well acquainted with Ron's weaknesses! Just because we're twins we get compared to each other all the time, like we're the same. Just ask Fred and George who I take after, and they'll tell you Ron's usually eating my dust. He's my twin, and I love him, but really, there's no comparison. Gred and Forge are the pranksters, but very smart. So's Charlie for that matter, though he's usually more interested in his magical creatures. Trust me, you could do much better than my twin."

"I know Ron's not the sharpest crayon in the box, but he's kinda cute, and sweet when he wants to be...and tall..."

"Tall? If that's what you're going for, then you can find a nice, tall, SMART guy to set your sights to. Blimey, most of the Weasley boys would fit that requirement! If red hair's your thing, choose just about any of the other Weasleys-except Charlie, 'cause I liked him first!"

"You'd be better off not choosing Percy either, for that matter...he's a bit too uptight for his own good," Ginny added.

"Think of it this way, sis, do you really want to be stuck with a guy who will be forever copying your homework and losing house points?"

"Erm, well, I suppose not. He's really sweet when he asks me to help him with his homework, but really, ALL the time?"

"Exactly!" both Ginny and Steph exclaimed.

"You know who I think would be good for you, Mia? Fred. He's just the type to help pull the true you..."

"The fun Mia," interjected Steph.

"...out of your shell," finished Ginny. Mentally adding, "I must have gone 'round the twist, playing matchmaker for my brothers!"

"I suppose you do have a point...it would be much nicer to be able to carry on an intelligent conversation with a guy I'm close to...and Fred is loads of fun to be around. He never fails to make me laugh, or bring a smile to my face when I'm being too serious."

"There you go, that's what's important; a guy who can make you laugh and lighten up when you're being a stick in the mud."

"Gee, thanks, Steph! I love you too!"

"Oh Mia, you know you've always been my favorite sister! I just want you to enjoy all this more, and revising 24/7 is not letting you experience all the fun and adventure that is Hogwarts. Besides, don't you think Fred is better looking than Ron?"

"He's definitely that, and wouldn't be trying to copy my homework incessantly!"

"Eh, I wouldn't know about that first part, but I suppose he does have his finer points…" Ginny relented. "I just can't believe BOTH of you like my brothers! Are you sure you don't need your heads examined?" (This was just met by two sets of rolled eyes.)

"Sis, do you think it's a coincidence we both have a thing for redheads?"

"I don't know, Mia, but there've been times I would've gladly taken one of Charlie's pansies, had he offered one to me, and I know what they do! All he'd have to do was send his dashing smile my way, bow, and I think I'd just melt."

"You'd look like you were melting if you took one of those flowers!"

"So what? It might even be worth it to have all that gorgeous charm of his directed at me!"

"I know what you mean, sis. There's something about Fred too…"

Exchanging a knowing look between them, Mia & Steph posed the obvious question to Ginny, "So, Miss Weasley, we know you don't fancy any of your brothers…"

"EWWW, Gross!"

"…so who do you have your eye on…"

"when you think no one is watching?"

{Blushing} "Harry. There's something about his green eyes that's just so…appealing. Sometimes I just want to stare into the green until I lose myself. Pretty scary, really, considering he always seems to know when someone's staring at him. That's just what I don't need to have happen."

With that development, Mia advised, "Ginny, next Saturday, why don't you ask Lily in the Room of Requirement if she's ever had guys staring into her eyes? Maybe she'd know of a special reason for that phenomenon."

"Of course, then she'll have no doubts whatsoever that you fancy her son. Are you sure that's a good idea?" Steph cautioned.

"I don't know if I'm ready to admit that to anyone else yet. What if Harry finds out from his mum or dad? I don't know how I'd face him without blushing fifteen shades of red myself."

"Ok then, let's do what we can to get those dreamy guys out of our minds, for now, at least. Let's come up with our own version of that prank…and maybe give the guys a taste of their own medicine!"

"Ooh, I do like how you think, sis." Perhaps the rest of us are starting to rub off on you?

Together, they thought up a similar prank that any of them could do – Pervius Dots. These looked like small polka dots, hardly bigger than the head of a muggle pencil eraser, to make for easier transfer onto an unsuspecting student's robes; with the same wet results. Hermione had even brought the perfect tool to make said dots…her hole punch. Ginny didn't know what to think of that metal gadget, and blurted out, "What the heck is that? Is it some kind of muggle torture device?" But, when Mia showed the little paper dots it made, she agreed it was quite the handy tool to help with their brilliant idea. Though Steph had questioned Mia many times about why she had that thing in her trunk, it did come in very useful after all. Then it was just a simple matter of turning the dots black (to match Hogwarts students' robes) and applying a short-term sticking charm. After the prank was done, the "dot" would simply fall off on its own...after exactly 15 minutes.

The top two ways of 'planting' those little, unassuming dots were the one-armed 'man hug' method, used almost exclusively male-to-male, and the "girly hug" method, which could be used on anyone, or by anyone. Luckily for the drenched students, this prank was also short in duration; since they usually had very little time between classes, and thus no time to run to one's dormitory to change shirts, the sweaty effect lasted only 15 minutes, after which the "victim" would again be perfectly dry. The "15 minute rule" came about because of what happened during their trial-run, when Ron presented a pansy to a shy Ravenclaw first year, and then felt so bad for her when she had to sit in a puddle of sweat for the duration of History of Magic. Naturally, no one wanted a repeat of that.

{T.A.}

Severus and Remus monitored the doings of this young group of pranksters, and were amused by their ingenuity. They watched as the rest of the school was trying to figure out who ASYLUM was. The Slytherins were the hardest hit, and were constantly looking over their shoulders trying to find anything out of the ordinary.

Paranoid was the only thing that came to mind about their actions. Severus considered talking to the group about easing off his house members, but then why should he? They were not being hurt. They brought on their plight by their actions against half-bloods and muggleborn students. They raised their noses at them and felt they were above them. He listened as they talked about this group called ASYLUM and heard they actually thought that it was the Claws that were behind the group, being so smart.

Severus and Remus thought it was time to test Harry and his band of misfits. They got together with Minerva and Filius, and devised a plan to see how well ASYLUM worked together.

Ginny and Hermione were looking over a set of pranks they were getting ready to launch, when they received a letter passed to them by another first year, saying that Professor Lupin wished to speak to them, and the rest of ASYLUM. Ginny called for Ron to get Harry and the twins, and Hermione left to get Steph; then, they left as a group to go see their favorite instructor.

When asked to enter, they were surprised to see four professors sitting there. They took a seat across from the four Professors, and waited for them to speak. It seemed the teachers wanted the group to sweat it out, but it didn't work, as the members of the group did things like cleaning their nails, or smoothing their hair. Harry, Fred, and George even took to pranking Ron, with Ron returning the favor. Ron's long nose was now the length of Pinnochio's; Fred had horns sticking up from his hair; George had earrings that had a chain attached and went around his neck, like a necklace; and Harry had a third eye that moved around on his face, giving him different perspectives of looking at things. It was the funniest when it was on his chin, as it gave him 3D vision for everything.

Remus couldn't hold on any longer and burst out laughing. Intimidation did not work on this group. Filius joined him soon after, as did Severus and Minerva. The group turned to the teachers and smiled. Soon Remus and Severus were wearing the invisable robes they wore at the station. Filius became the size of Hagrid, for which he was most pleased. Minerva became the spitting mage of Albus Dumbledore, for which she was not too happy. It was now the students' turn to laugh, which they all did.

The test now began, as the two sides faced off against each other, and the spells began to flow from all their wands. Fred and George had to figure out how to work together, as they became joined at the hip. Steph became really upset, when she lost all her hair on her head, and found it growing on her chest, and under her arms. Ginny suddenly felt her pants became real tight and looked down to see the biggest butt she ever saw adorning her hips. Her walk became very exaggerated, as her hips swayed too much. Hermione's head expanded to the size of a medicine ball, and her hair line receded almost to the middle of her head. Harry had not been touched. He knew the Marauders moves, and soon learned Filius' and Minerva's and was able to avoid or reject their spells. He was the only one free of spell work. Ron's "Pinnochinose" started to grow twigs, and had birds nesting in its forks.

Finally it was over, and the combatants sat and laughed over their appearances. If Harry thought he was going to get off scott-free, he was certainly mistaken. Ten spells soon hit him; three of which landed. His third eye became fixed between his other two, and turned bright orange. The messy hair on his head was nothing compared to the bush growing out of his nose. He couldn't believe his own group attacked him.

After an hour, all changes were gone and they were all back to normal, sipping butterbeers. Severus started talking to the students. "Remus and I felt it was time to test ASYLUM, and asked for the help of our esteemed colleagues. I must say, you were all impressive. Fitting to be called heirs to the Marauders."

The group all smiled at this admission from a member of said group, and their smiles became bigger when it was confirmed by the other three Professors. This was when Sirius stepped out laughing at the kids sitting there staring at him. "Yes, I have been here all this time, and half the spells that hit you guys were mine. We didn't want to take the chance of not getting any hits in, so I helped out the Professors and was lucky to get in a few good licks." Sirius never felt the tail growing out of his butt. Steph still had the touch.

A/N: Dear readers, this is officially the first "chapter" I wrote, except for the last section with the professors...that's Ollie's! I hope I've come somewhere close to meeting Ollie's usual standards. What did you think? Please read & review! -Stephanie O.

A/N (Take two): Ollie pointed out a very important fact that I overlooked, so I've made changes to this chapter already. Please tell me what you think! - Stephanie