The next morning, Hawkeye woke up late. She gazed out the window serenely, watching the clouds move lazily through the sky. When she turned over, she saw an unfamiliar handbag lying on her dressing table. Huh? Then, it all came back to her, images rushing through her mind at a sickening pace. Oh, god...

Her stomach lurched. She ran to the bathroom and flung the door open, before sinking to the tile floor and heaving, vomiting into the toilet. She raised her head and tried to stand, but her head throbbed and she crashed to the floor again, holding it between her hands.

She felt so dizzy, her head was spinning. Hawkeye used her elbows to support herself over the toilet bowl. Tears fell into the water as she heard the door open and close. "Riza?" A paper bag rustled as Gracia dropped it onto the table. "I brought you some breakfast... oh, my!" She left the bag and was next to Hawkeye in an instant, rubbing her back gently in circular patterns and holding her hair out of the way as the lieutenant threw up. When Hawkeye was finished, Gracia handed her a glass of water. "Here."

Riza accepted it and drank it all, occasionally rinsing her mouth in the sink. "Thank you so much, Gracia..." She said weakly, leaning forward. "For all of your help...I honestly don't know what I would have done without you."

Gracia laughed a little. "I'm the mother of a three year old. Trust me, I've seen worse."

Hawkeye stood up slowly and flushed the toilet, supporting herself on the counter. "Make sure that Elysia listens to you, and takes good care of herself, okay?"

There was an intense silence as Gracia's gaze met Hawkeye's. "I will."

~

As Hawkeye dressed, Gracia waited patiently. "Hurry, Maes is coming up in a few minutes with an update on your schedule today, or so he says." Hawkeye nodded and got into her uniform, and tied up her hair. She had just finished, when there was a knock at the door. "Come in," Hawkeye called, saluting Hughes as he opened the door. He gave his wife a quick kiss, and turned to Hawkeye. "How are you doing?"

"I'll live," Hawkeye said, a bit resentfully.

Hughes gave her a grim smile. "The Colonel requests that you come to his office immediately, he would like to speak with you."

The Lieutenant's eyes widened. "No."

Hughes signed. "He's desperate to see you, Lieutenant, perhaps if I supervised the conversation..."

"No!" Her voice had a razor sharp edge to it.

The Lieutenant Colonel tried again. "I'm sorry, Lieutenant, but it was a direct order."

Riza looked from Hughes to Gracia, who were both gazing at her with clear sympathy and even concern. "Stop looking at me like that," She said, a bit harshly. "I'll go, but only for five minutes, you got that? No more than five minutes."

Hughes paused. "Excellent. Let's go, then. Gracia, I'll catch up with you later." Gracia nodded and waved as Hawkeye and Hughes left the room.

They walked in silence. Hughes tried to make conversation a few times, but Hawkeye ignored him. "As I told you, nobody knows about last night's events but us, so the Colonel has been instructed to continue his day normally. He'll be in his office," He added. She said nothing, but knocked twice on the door.

"Come in," Came the Colonel's reply. Hawkeye gave Hughes one last glance. He nodded grimly, opening the door for her. She sighed and entered, not once looking up at the Colonel.

He was sitting at his desk, looking like hell. His hair was a mess, he was pale and listless, and his eyes were red from being rubbed at.

"Good morning, Lieutenant," He said slowly.

She crossed her arms and looked away.

Roy bit his lip in frustration. "I really don't know what to say. This is really hard for me-"

Riza scoffed. "Hard for you."

He stood up and slammed his fists onto the desk. "Why can't you be mature about this?"

She glared at him now, angry tears welling up in her eyes. "You took advantage of me, you sick bastard, and you want me to be mature? Okay, I'll be mature! You're a disgrace! You were completely smashed last night! Hughes had to knock you out to get you off of me! I've never, not once in my life, been so utterly and completely humiliated!" She broke off, her face burning, tears coming again.

Roy watched her as the tears came again, she began to cry. "Riza, I'm so, so sorry," He said, looking at her seriously. "That's all I can say. I never would have done it, never should have-"

"You will address me formally, sir," She growled at him.

"So what, then? Are we just going to ignore each other for the rest of out lives? Are you going to avoid me, like a child?"

"Sounds like a good plan."

"Riza, please..."

She stood up, cocking her gun and raising it to his eye level. "I asked you to address me formally, Sir," She said calmly, forcing herself to remain cool and collected as always, but she could only hold out for so long, before she threw the gun forcefully at the wall behind him. "Dammit!" She raged. "Why does nobody respect me? Why does nobody take me seriously? The only time that that ever happens is when I've got this fucking gun aimed at them! Why is that? Am I weak? Am I just a joke to you?"

"Lieutenant," He said sharply. "Do you have any idea..."

Oh, this is going to be good.

"Any idea whatsoever..."

He's gonna try and make me feel guilty. Riza, I do so much more work than you, et cetera. Typical.

"Any grasp at all of the unbelievable concept..."

She rolled her eyes. At least, I still have one weapon at my disposal.

Damn...what's it called again?

"Any, ANY idea at all..."

Oh, yeah. Sarcasm.

"...Of how much I love you?"

Hawkeye opened her mouth to say something nasty, but stopped. Her mouth stayed open, but her words suddenly failed her. "...I'm sorry?"

"You heard me, Lieutenant."

She sat in silence for a long time, staring at him. "You..."

"I love you."

At these words, something invisible and divinely important came hurtling at her from the very core of the universe and knocked the wind out of her. She suddenly felt dizzy as she realized it, as if she was standing at the edge of a high cliff, nothing but blackness beneath her. Her lungs burned for air, though she was breathing normally. "...I ...I have to go." She whispered, as if she didn't believe herself.

Roy looked concerned. "Lieutenant, wait."

She stood up and backed away from him, shaking her head, eyes wide. "No..."

"No, please, don't go, Riza, wait! Riza-"

But she'd already turned and ran, tearing away, leaving her gun in the office with him.

She didn't stop running. She passed people that stared after her as she ran, but she still didn't stop, or answer them. "Are you alright? Lieutenant Hawkeye?" The clip that held her hair up fell out, clattered into a corner of the hallway, but she didn't stop to pick it up. She just ran, and ran, and ran, with no idea and no care at all for where she was going. It didn't matter. She just needed to get out. When she was sure that she was alone, she locked the door to a room, which one, she didn't know. She threw herself over to the corner and let herself slide down to the floor. Then, with nobody there to put an arm around her, nobody to stop her, nobody to see her, she began to cry. "I love him," she sobbed, tilting to the side and lying on the carpet, knees tucked up against her chest. "I love him." She gripped the carpet tightly, her tears leaving wet stains that spread out over it, as if the entire world was spinning out of control, out of the galaxy and out into the universe, faster and faster, never slowing, never stopping. Her heart was pounding. What the fuck is wrong with me? I never lose my cool. Never! I'm Riza Hawkeye! I'm always in control of myself. What the hell is happening? But deep down, she knew it. It felt raw, like an open wound. I'm in love. I'm in love with the Colonel. God, how could I be so stupid? How could I not have realized it?

I love him.