Title: Marriage of Hard Work and Genius
Author Notes: There is some M rated content towards the end. Sorry this is later than normal but it took awhile to get it to work and it is longer than normal too. Review if you like.
It'd been almost two months now since he and Gai had taken this mission. The mission objectives were vague enough that most would have been apprehensive but to more seasoned ninja it was all in a days work. Blood contract marriages were not typically done but a daimyo wanted to use this specific one to bind one of his children and needed to know the specifics more than was outlined in the scrolls available. Essentially this was a research mission, a very expensive one but it would at least give more information on whether this type of contract was a viable option for 'royal' marriages.
In four months the mission it would be complete- if things went according to plan. But the way he'd been feeling lately, with such intense emotional spikes, Kakashi was beginning to worry that maybe they were going to fail this mission. Because of him.
He'd just returned from a mission yesterday, and he still felt strangely tired, which wasn't at all normal when he hadn't used his sharingan, which he hadn't. But the tiredness wasn't bothering him. No, what was bothering him was something much, much stranger then that.
He had been gaining weight, steadily, for the past month and a half, and he couldn't figure out why (not only that, but everything he ate made him feel like throwing up. Everything but rice with curry on it, oddly enough.)
Kakashi came into the kitchen, rubbing the back of his neck (wearing a particularly baggy casual kimono. Though that did nothing to hide the weight gain, which Anko had oh-so-sweetly pointed out was beginning to show in his cheeks.). Getting a glass Kakashi filled it with water, before tugging his mask down and taking a slow sip. He hoped, desperately, Gai didn't make any comment to him, about his apparently random weight gain, or the tension in his shoulders, which clearly showed he was mad.
Gai had been gone for three days and was at his limit for people. Dropping off his mission report it had taken more than he had cared to admit in his willpower not to knock someone's head off for random acts. Being in a foul mood always made Gai want to avoid people.
As he walked in Gai noticed Kakashi and gave a brief salute before heading into the bedroom. Idly he noticed that Kakashi's ass was looking particularly lovely and full. Taking off his clothes Gai stepped into the shower and cleaned himself off resolving to at least attempt to act normal.
Shuffling into the bedroom again when he was done, Gai put on a pair of boxers, threw on a yukata and just flopped face down on the bed. Half asleep Gai tried to figure out what it was specifically that was keeping him from slipping fully into the splendors of sleep. Kakashi's ass firmly in mind, Gai rolled over and sat up.
Going to the bedroom door, Gai leaned against the jab and studied Kakashi for a moment. Overall Kakashi seemed to have a strange aura around him as well as a general thickening around the middle. Then with a mental shrug he walked over to his bookshelf and pulled out a few scrolls to see if he could track down what was disrupting his sleep pattern. Not finding anything to satisfy the itch in the back of his skull in the first scroll he moved on to the next hopeful he could figure out why Kakashi's weight gain gave him cause to pull up information on something besides a better meal plan.
Kakashi was strangely relieved when Gai didn't speak to him, which made him feel slightly awkward. Placing the cup in the counter Kakashi folded his arms over his chest, telling himself that no, he was not hungry (it'd only been a couple of hours since he'd eaten after all).
He wasn't sure why he was just standing there, but when he felt Gai's eyes on him, he bristled. Annoyed that the man had taken notice, but more annoyed that he was just staring. When Gai finally walked away, which felt like an eternity to Kakashi, he realized what it was he wanted to eat; Pastries.
Frowning Kakashi, who'd never liked anything sweet, not even as a child, wondered what on earth could have prompted this sudden want. When he came up with no reasoning behind it he decided he would ignore it.
Going into the bedroom to see if Gai had fallen asleep Kakashi glanced over at the other man, wondering what on earth he could be reading, Kakashi sat heavily on the bed, leaning back against the mound of pillows, Kakashi grabbed one and dragged it around to wrap his arms around. The motion seemed almost defensive.
Not really sure why Kakashi had come into the bedroom if he was only going to sit on the bed and hug a pillow, Gai put down the scroll detailing pregnancy information. Deeming it irrelevant to his situation Gai set it aside and turned to Kakashi. Shifting up and laying on his stomach on top of the bed Gai looked at Kakashi steadily.
"I am reading up on blood marriages. Just some lesser known facts and such." Gai tilted his at Kakashi. "Is there something bothering you?" Gai inquired wanting to get whatever was on Kakashi's mind out of the way so he had a chance of sleeping without injury to his person.
Kakashi narrowed his eyes at Gai, almost as if the mere mention of the blood marriage angered him, but he didn't move to act on his anger/annoyance. "Yes." he snapped in response to Gai's question. Quite a bit was bothering him, though logically he knew it shouldn't, especially as it never had before.
Perhaps this was some sort of effect, he wondered, to being labeled the 'wife'?
"Everything is bothering me." Kakashi muttered before he could stop himself, looking away he huffed. "Can you bake?" he asked, quite randomly as he shifted down further on the bed, drawing the pillow closer, tightening his grip on it as if he wanted to hurt it.
He wasn't sure why he was even asking. Even if Gai made the best cakes, or danishes- ah that was it, he wanted a cheese danish- in the world he wouldn't eat them! Sweets made him sick, and he certainly wasn't going to allow his body to be put –any further- out of commission, by feeling ill.
"I want a danish." Kakashi admitted, and damned his vocals, he mentally cursed himself as he glanced at Gai, furrowing his brow, as if Gai were doing something to annoy him.
Gai raised an eyebrow and stared at his spouse for a moment. "You...want a sweet..." The words were formed more as a statement than anything else. "I think you should get seen by the Hokage. You don't eat sweets. You don't even pretend to eat sweets. I think I even have gone on a mission with you and you refused to eat something because it had unnecessary sugars."
Sitting up Gai regard Kakashi thoughtfully. "If you want a danish I can get you one after we see the Hokage."
Kakashi scowled when Gai deliberately ignored his question. "That's stupid Gai." he snapped climbing out of bed, tossing the pillow down, and folding his arms over his chest, "Seeing the Hokage will be a waste of time." Kakashi insisted, but didn't say no.
Putting a hand on his chest to make sure Gai saw that he meant him, and only him, "I will go see her. Though I have reason to believe," Kakashi said haughtily, "That she's too busy to care that I want a danish."
As he spoke Kakashi realized that he was being outrageous, as well as, well, stupid. But he couldn't stop himself. It was almost as if he were speaking impulsively, which he was. But he couldn't understand why, he'd never done so before.
"I'm not sick, you know?" Kakashi snapped, placing a hand on his hip, "I feel fine! I'm just hungry." sighing, obviously annoyed, Kakashi rubbed his eye slowly, "I dunno why you're making such a big deal out of this, Gai." he muttered, though he knew, that in reality, it was him who was making a big deal out of it.
Feeling his bad mood worsen steadily Gai crossed his arms over his chest and regarded Kakashi evenly. "For all I know you could be sick with a tapeworm or something causing you to eat and never really feel full. The reason I am requesting you go to the Hokage is more than just your sudden craving for sweets. If you want to believe otherwise then that is your prerogative not mine."
Kakashi scoffed turning away, "This is stupid." he said throwing a hand up, as if to indicate Gai shouldn't speak, "I'm going out." Kakashi snapped quickly walking from the room, into the living room, to where he'd left his sandals at the door.
Slipping them on Kakashi realized he felt strangely exposed in this kimono. It would feel strange being outside dressed like this. So unlike himself. Kakashi hesitated, feeling self conscious. Slipping his sandals off he walked back into the bedroom, and quickly began changing into his regular uniform, making sure to keep his back to Gai.
After a moment Kakashi put his forehead protector on, and hesitantly turned toward Gai, "Uh," he started, feeling strangely awkward, and feeling bad for the way he'd just talked to the other man, "Are you going to come with me?" he asked nervously, slipping his hands into his pockets, and glancing away, slightly embarrassed.
Looking at Kakashi, Gai came to realization that for all his bravado and hip attitude, Kakashi tended to act like a child when faced with factual information. Knowing that if he gave it up too soon that he would be seen as weak Gai spoke with a pointed air.
"It depends," Gai responded evenly. "Are you going to see the Hokage?" Sitting up Gai began to dress himself again in his standard attire. "Ready whenever you are."
Kakashi frowned, looking at the ground, he nodded after a moment, he didn't want to go to see Tsunade, maybe just because he didn't want Gai to be right, but also because he believed there wasn't anything wrong with him.
Kakashi remained silent on the way to see Tsunade, it almost seemed as if he were pouting. When they got to the office he spoke with Shizune, and once they were permitted, and Tsunade asked why they were there Kakashi merely shrugged, looking toward Gai, "Gai seems," he said lazily, "To believe there's something wrong with me." he said softly, almost glaring at Gai as he spoke.
"No I think you are perfect physically however you choose to act." Gai sighed. "However you have been having the most extreme mood swings I have seen outside of the time half the kunichi population menstruated at the same time and every male ninja was very very careful about what came out of their mouths."
Scratching his head Gai tried to think of other instances where Kakashi's behavior had bordered on the absurd. "There is also this craving for sweets. I have known Kakashi to break into hives at the thought of eating anything with more than the bare minimum of sugar." Having a random thought pop into his head, Gai laughed. "It is almost like he is pregnant."
"It's unlikely but their is a very small...almost impossible possibility that Kakashi could be pregnant." Tsunade stood up and walked toward Kakashi. "You would have to be very compatible in a few things and one of you would have to have a certain bloodline for..."
As Tsunade continued explaining the conditions, Gai mentally checked some off and put others away for further examination later. Looking at Kakashi, Gai wondered how he was taking all of this. With his luck, Gai mused, he would be sleeping in the dog house.
Kakashi tensed at Gai's words, his hand twitching, almost as if he wanted to hit the man. At his pregnant comment Kakashi turned his head toward Gai slowly, giving him his most scathing look, "Ridiculous." he muttered, before turning his attention back to Tsunade.
He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Was she really standing there telling him he could, and might be pregnant? He couldn't believe these people, sometimes they could be so preposterous. "Tsunade-sama," Kakashi said awkwardly, putting a hand flat against Gai's chest and pushing the man backward toward the door.
Some of these qualifications were dangerously close to some of his ancestry. And he didn't like where this was going, "Is there an examination I could get?" he asked softly, "Ah, right now if at all possible." he added, glaring back at Gai, and motioning toward the door.
If Tsunade was right he didn't want to have to deal with Gai when he was feeling this... angry with the other man. Angry that he could potentially be pregnant, angry that Gai had caused it, and angry just for the sake of being angry. "Why don't you," he said, feigning his usual calmness, "Go visit with people, Gai?"
"No." Gai felt his jaw muscles tighten. "This involves me as much as you. If you are pregnant than we have to discuss options and think about how to handle things. If you aren't then we know that we may have to start taking precautions." Crossing his arms and standing his ground, Gai completely chose to ignore the fact that the ANBU guarding the Hokage had tensed and were now more than a little intrusive.
"Gai," Kakashi said carefully, as he raised a hand to pinch the bridge of his nose, "No." he said firmly. "This is, undoubtedly, a private doctor-patient kinda deal, so, go." Kakashi spared the ANBU a glare, noticing they'd begun watching him, well, them.
He was annoyed, unable to believe that just when he'd gotten his ANBU back, gotten his former glory back, begun to do something he was enjoying again; he was about to lose it. "I don't want you here." Kakashi finally snapped as he slipped his hands in his pockets looking at Gai blankly. "We can, and will, discuss it when I get home." Kakashi said, huffing slightly.
Gai felt his eyebrow twitch and the Hokage looked at him sharply. Realizing that a bit of black chakra had popped out in his current elevated emotional state, Gai took a deep breath to speak and the Hokage interrupted him.
"You can come back once I am done. For the time being you will take yourself off and if necessary destroy half my forest but you will not allow that chakra to come through again." Tsunade looked at Gai with a deadly serious look. "If it comes to it I will spar with you later but that chakra stays buried."
Eyes narrowed, Gai stood for a moment and regarded the Hokage. Saluting sharply Gai jutsued away. Finding himself in the middle of the forest Gai proceeded to lay waste to it. Working off his bad mood in the only way that seemed even slightly healthy, by training.
Kakashi was annoyed, but slightly relieved that Gai had gone. He stayed silent throughout the examination, and when it was over and he received the news, it felt as if the axis had broken and his world was spinning out of control.
And for the first time in his life (while healthy anyway) Kakashi fainted.
When sending Sakura to Gai inevitably was deemed a bad idea, and she was instead dispatched to wake Kakashi. An ANBU was sent to alert Gai that Tsunade had something to tell him, and once he was finished telling Gai he disappeared.
When Sakura woke Kakashi she gave him a cup of warm tea, and sat with him on the bench outside Tsunade's office, where he was glaring at the floor with such an intense hate that she wondered if it was even safe to sit with him.
Knuckles bloodied and bruised slightly, Gai walked down the hallway to the Hokage's office with a dangerous glint in his eye. Seeing Kakashi and Sakura sitting together on the bench outside he stopped just short of them.
"So?" Feeling more than a little annoyed Gai waited for someone to tell him what was going on.
Kakashi heaved a sigh at Gai's approach, reaching up he ruffled Sakura's hair, "Sakura, I'm sure Tsunade-sama needs you for something." Sakura frowned, wanting to stay and listen, but she could tell by Kakashi's tone that he didn't plan on talking to her about it. Rising slowly she paused to bow to Gai before walking back into Tsunade's office.
"I have to," Kakashi said slowly, turning his gaze up toward Gai, "Retire from ANBU." he muttered ruefully. Setting the cup Sakura had given him on the bench Kakashi stood up slowly, slipping his hands into his pockets, and looking at the floor.
"I'm going," he started slowly, "Out to eat, Gai." Glancing up at the other man as he started to walk past he paused beside him, "We can, uh, talk about this now, if you want to come with me." Kakashi said softly.
Nodding, Gai motioned for Kakashi to lead the way. He tried to keep his emotions under wraps for the moment. If nothing else he could at least avoid Kakashi for a while after they spoke. By avoiding Kakashi, Gai was giving himself time to digest whatever had happened. The news would probably send him spiralling for a time if the rumbling in his stomach was anything to go by.
Kakashi walked silently, opting to wait until they got in town. When they did he led Gai to a strangely extravagant tea house, in the more upscale area of town. He hesitated at the door, and the occupants of the tea house looked at him and Gai with a look that could only be described as horror. Until a woman slowly, almost as if she were too shocked to move, came from behind the counter and approached them.
She was an older woman, around the age of Tsunade, though she had aged well (like Jiraiya). She looked at Kakashi strangely, and opened the door wider, and finally Kakashi stepped inside, slipping his shoes off, and putting on a pair of white geta that sat on a white pad, the woman quickly retrieved a pair of geta for Gai, and placed them on the floor in front of him.
"Are you," she asked in a tone of complete disbelief, "really him?" she seemed almost happy, and Kakashi sighed shaking his head slightly.
"His son." he corrected and her face fell, she muttered a soft 'Oh' before leading them to a room in the back. Sitting them at the table she placed two small paper menus on the table, before she bowed out and closed the door, going to get them tea.
Kakashi picked up the menu slowly and sat staring at it, "I haven't been here," he said looking up at Gai, "Since I was four." he knew that Gai would understand his reasoning, but he wasn't sure the man would understand the fact that he didn't want to talk about it.
Looking around him and noting all exit routes and possible attach points, Gai chose not to respond to Kakashi's comment. At present was he working on his patience not getting the best of him. Not wanting to offend Kakashi more than he probably would normally, Gai studied the menu in silence and debated on what to get. He always felt uncomfortable in tea houses. They were just a little too formal and too other for him to feel right at home.
He could appreciate the whimsical nature he supposed but he didn't really see anything to make him want to stay. Contemplating what to get led Gai to notice his knuckles bleeding through his bandages. Removing the bandages he cleaned the knuckles with some water from the table. Mopping them dry with a napkin from his pouch, Gai rebandaged his fingers and dropped his menu.
When the woman returned placing a tray on the table, and began unloading the tray, she smiled at Kakashi, "Are you two ready to order?" she asked softly, and Kakashi nodded, glancing up at Gai, after noticing Gai had discarded his menu Kakashi decided to order for him.
"Ah, please bring us some Hoso-maki, Ten-don. And some dango, please." Kakashi said as he pushed his menu across the table to her, she nodded as she took the menus and the tray, before bowing out. Kakashi poured them both a cup of tea, before deciding to actually do what they'd come here to do, and talk.
"Any particular name," he started as he looked up at Gai, wondering if the other man was going to annoyed that he'd ordered for both of them, "you have picked out whether the baby is a boy or a girl?" Kakashi asked as he tugged his mask down, "I never really thought about it, because I'd never expected to have any kids. But I'm sure you must have given it some thought." Kakashi said as he took a slow sip of his tea, watching Gai attentively.
Like a match in a hurricane Gai felt his temper die abruptly. How in the hell Kakashi did it Gai would never know but just when Gai was contemplating the wisdom of strangling Kakashi the man would say something like that. For a moment Gai thought about it and found himself going through all the names he had thought of but realized one fatal flaw with all of them.
"They are going to have your last name." Gai moaned putting his head down. "None of the names I ever thought of actually go with Hatake." Putting his chin on the table Gai regarded Kakashi solemnly. "I'm sorry. If I had even thought for a second you could get pregnant I would have done something to prevent it." Then realizing he was lying Gai sat up. "No wait scratch that I am sorry for the fact that you are suddenly pregnant but I am not sorry that it happened. This is great news." Finding his first real smile of the day Gai found himself curious about something.
"Do they have any particular naming traditions in your family?"
Kakashi hesitated, a strange, and totally foreign look crossing his features, a look that could only be described as sorrow. "Yes." he admitted, choosing to ignore Gai's comment about the pregnancy. He was sure if Gai had known he'd likely have asked if they could try anyway.
Kakashi looked down, smiling ruefully, remembering something his father had told him a week before he'd taken his own life ('From your biggest mistakes, often come your greatest miracles.') he still didn't understand it, and he was sure he never would. "Luckily," Kakashi said, pausing to sip from his tea, "My family all died in the last two wars."
It was a truly strange feeling knowing you were the last of your family, Sasuke thought no one knew how he felt. But he was wrong, Kakashi too had been young once. Of course he'd been born after the clan had been wiped out, leaving only a few members, who died shortly after his father had taken his own life.
"My name..." Kakashi sounded almost disappointed. "What is your fathers name, Gai?" he asked looking up at the other man, "You're labeled husband, therefore saving me the trouble of being forced to name my son," Kakashi inhaled sharply, "Sakumo." he realized as soon as he'd finished speaking that he could potentially have a girl (he doubted it though. He was sure he'd have a son. It only made sense, after all).
Twiddling his thumbs Gai looked at the ceiling for a moment. "I would rather not name any son of mine after either of my fathers. There names were Ryu and Dai." Shaking his head Gai sighed and waited for the laughs to begin.
Resolving to give this child the best upbringing he possibly could Gai realized he had zoned out a bit. "Sorry I was just thinking about what she could potentially look like." Gai didn't know why but he felt as though he was going to have a daughter. He would like that he realized. A little girl genius of hard work with Kakashi's looks. Then he realized how much trouble those looks could get her into Gai threw a prayer in that she resembled him more.
Kakashi was a little surprised Gai had been raised by two men. How, Kakashi wondered, had he had two fathers? Had they used a woman to have him? "You had two fathers?" Kakashi asked, trying to sound casual, but ending up sounding slightly curious.
"Ah, if he's a boy then Gai," Kakashi said already deciding the baby was a boy, "Why don't we name him Arata?" the name in question meant 'new' or 'fresh', and Kakashi decided that since neither of them seemed interested in tradition in this case, then the name would be appropriate. What if it was a girl though, Kakashi wondered? He couldn't imagine how he would feel if it was a girl, when he'd already begun to plan for a son.
Kakashi realized suddenly, with a startling realization, that he was acting just like his own father. Who had had his life planned before he'd even been in the womb three months. "You know," Kakashi said suddenly, "I..." he paused, looking slightly perturbed, "I don't know if I want him, or her, to be a... shinobi." Kakashi muttered softly, turning his gaze down toward the table.
"Oh thank you for saying that." Gai exhaled happily. "I want them to be able to defend themselves of course but another career choice would be ideal." Nodding and happy they agreed on that at least Gai chose not to explain his childhood.
"I don't like Arata." Gai shook his head thoughtfully. "In this case I think it would be best if we meet him or her first before we name them. I have always felt that it is awkward when people don't fit their names. Though having ideas doesn't hurt I suppose." Drinking his tea Gai thought for a time. "Hatake Midori or Hatake Kaito?"
Kakashi wasn't really surprised Gai didn't elaborate, he'd noticed that there weren't many shinobi who actually did talk about their childhood, or parents. "Those are both nice names." Kakashi said softly, surprised that Gai had agreed with him about the Shinobi aspect.
"We can teach, uh, it," Kakashi said awkwardly, "How to defend itself. Maybe taijutsu." Kakashi said thoughtfully, he too would like the child to be able to defend itself, in case of another war, but he wouldn't force it to be a shinobi.
Kakashi looked up as the door slid open, and a young woman entered carrying a tray with their food on it, she seemed shy, and awkward, keeping her eyes on the floor as she set the dishes on table, Kakashi nodded to her, and she quickly bowed out, shooting Gai and almost scared look.
"I suppose," Kakashi said as the door shut, "We are the first shinobi to come in here in the last twenty years.: Kakashi frowned, remembering how this whole section of the city used to be shinobi. Back when he'd lived here.
"My house is right around the corner from here." Kakashi suddenly said, unsure of why he'd mentioned it, he scowled before taking a sip of his tea, and looking at the wall.
"Do you want to visit then?" Gai tilted his head and regarded Kakashi thoughtfully. "Though I can't imagine you have a lot of good recent memories there." Looking around Gai studied the intricate details of the room. "I am glad we are the only shinobi. It feels calmer and nice not to have a lot of active chakra presences around."
Sipping his tea Gai contemplated some of the changes that would need to be made to the house. "I think the guestroom would make a stunning nursery but not for a while. I don't really want to tell anyone yet. That damn rumor from Ten Ten will be considered fact and as flattering as I may find it I doubt you will enjoy being considered more of a wife."
Kakashi sat silently, regarding Gai's question from the most neutral position he possibly could. There was no way, he told himself, that he had seen his father die in that house. He didn't even know why he'd brought it up.
"No." Kakashi said, not intending for his voice to come out as cold as it did, "I would rather not."
Kakashi shifted up onto his knees after a moments hesitation, and began to serve Gai his food. He felt a little awkward doing so, but he ignored the feeling. "Actually," Kakashi said as he glanced up at Gai, "Tenten's rumor would make this seem much more... plausible. As usual, Gai" Kakashi said as he sat back, serving himself, "I would simply ignore the rumors." he smiled slightly at Gai, as if he thought the other man were a gossip monger.
"While you would ignore it I would chafe." Gai figured from Kakashi's tone that touching on the subject of Kakashi's old home would be a conversation he shouldn't touch with a ten foot pole and a clone. "I would be more than annoyed if you really were my wife and a woman. Do you know how irritating it would be to realize that all these years I have been getting my ass handed to me by a girl. It sounds sexist but so what. I like Kakashi, my husband, the man." Nodding definitely Gai looked to where Kakashi had served him and chose not to comment.
"Granted I suppose Tenten's rumor will serve its purpose." After some more thought Gai conceded the point. "How are the dogs settling in. They haven't tried to take a chunk off me in a few weeks so I think they are tolerating me...maybe. Though Pakkun may have kittens now that you are pregnant."
Kakashi had to smile, despite himself, as Gai spoke about their relationship. He thought it strangely adorable that Gai was glad he was a man. "They're fine." he commented, thinking about how happy the dogs seemed now that they had a full sized yard to play in.
Pakkun, who Kakashi had noticed still didn't leave the house that often, used to complain for being locked inside all day.
Gai's last comment took Kakashi by surprise, making him think of something his father used to say about dogs ('He'd knew before she did' he used to laugh petting his wolf Roxa). "I always thought," Kakashi said strangely thoughtful, "a dog would be able to detect such a thing before a human could."
The more Kakashi thought about it, the more he realized Pakkun had been avoiding him. Maybe he had... but why hadn't he told Kakashi? Kakashi felt agitated.
"Well that would explain why I have been almost tripping over him and he has been covertly stalking you." Gai scratched his chin thoughtfully. "Which would mean he knew but was hoping he was wrong." Shaking his head Gai didn't know what to think. "I know Pakkun doesn't like me much. Okay maybe at all so maybe that is why he has been so weird."
Looking at his tea Gai felt the urge to kowtow and apologize to Kakashi for the situation again but he wasn't sure how it would look. Reaching over Gai took Kakashi's hand and kissed it through his glove.
Kakashi's cheeks flushed slightly, obviously a little embarrassed by Gai's display of affection (though they were in a secluded room), Kakashi lightly pressed Gai's hand, though he kept his gaze carefully adverted. "Perhaps..." Kakashi agreed, thinking the whole thing over carefully. That would make sense.
Kakashi didn't pull his hand away (he wondered idly, if the action surprised Gai at all), but rather kept his eyes carefully trained on his plate, hesitantly he lifted his chopsticks, as if he were about to eat, but he lowered them before doing so.
"I'm sorry," Kakashi started, as he glanced up toward Gai, "For the way I've been acting." he knew he'd been just the wrong side of intolerable lately. And he knew it was going to a lot worse, but he didn't feel the need to mention that just yet.
"I haven't exactly been my normal self either." Shaking his head, Gai sighed and removed his hand from Kakashi's happy that he had gotten to keep it there for a little while. Gai wondered if he should tell Kakashi that he planned to talk to his belly and snuggle him more regularly now that he was pregnant. For the moment though Gai figured it would be best not to mention that.
Picking up his chopsticks, Gai went through the standard checks for poison. Finishing he began to eat and then a thought occurred to him. Putting his chopsticks down, Gai looked at Kakashi for a time unsure how to word his inquiry.
"You do realize that your chakra and control is going to be shot to hell right?" Gai started to speak not sure how he could segway into the next part of the conversation what he really wanted to say. "I know that with most transplants that are successful the limb becomes integrated into the bodies system and if it is not rejected it is treated like the original part. Is there any possibility that because you had the Sharingan transplanted at such a young age that it has become fully integrated into your system and becomes hereditary?"
Kakashi winced, almost as if Gai had hit him. Laying his chopsticks down carefully he pushed his plate away, and stared at the table, threading his fingers he pressed his palms flat against the table. To a normal person it might have seemed a contemplative motion, but Kakashi was sure Gai knew him well enough to see he was upset. Not necessarily angry, just upset (almost enough to be considered sad).
"I've never," Kakashi said after a stretch of silence, "Thought about it." Gai's words brought to mind, painfully so, the thoughts Kakashi had been trying not think. It shouldn't be him sitting here, celebrating. It should be Obito and Rin. They should be having their first child.
Itachi would have killed him, a part of his mind, the darker, ANBU part of his mind supplied suddenly, and Kakashi closed his eyes, inhaling slowly, deeply. Better that he was sitting here, then knowing that Itachi was somewhere not giving a second thought to the family he'd murdered.
"I would hope not, though." Kakashi finally said, as he dragged one of his hands away from the other, to pick his cup of tea up. "Maybe Tsunade-sama, or Shizune could tell us the likelihood of such an event." Kakashi suggested. But no, he knew that they wouldn't have any information on that. The only person alive who would have even thought of the types of experiments to learn such a thing, was Orochimaru. And that was of no help to them.
"I shouldn't have brought it up." Gai felt miserable. He could tell he had upset Kakashi. "Look don't worry about it. I will go through my family scrolls and see if I can track anything down. Medical journals are dry reading but they can be informative." Reaching over he took Kakashi's hand and looked at him. "Whatever happens with our child, they will be one of the luckiest ones in the world to have us as parents."
Giving Kakashi a shy smile, Gai withdrew his hands again. "Now that I have ruined the mood what say you to boxing this up, going home and having leftovers later?" Puttering around a bit Gai tried to reason why he felt his chest contracting slightly when he imagined the future with him and Kakashi.
"Sure," Kakashi said dryly, almost as if he weren't really paying attention with what was happening, standing up after a moment Kakashi went to the door and opened it, motioning the older woman inside he asked her to bring them some boxes to take home and the check.
He felt strangely tired, "I'll be on an advised medical leave." he said sounding strangely distant as he pulled his mask up. The geta looked strange, and he hated them he realized. He would probably be able to do some stuff around the village, but he would rather stay home then do genin missions alone.
Maybe he could take on a new cell... Kakashi sat down again, waiting for the woman to return. "I'm not upset with you Gai." Kakashi said at length, as if it were important Gai know that. The woman returned quickly, handing Kakashi the check, while she readied their food.
Kakashi paid quickly, shooting Gai a glance as he put the money on the table. He half expected Gai to argue as he stood up and took the boxes from the woman.
"Good." Gai nodded and didn't specify what he thought was good. Making it a point to be otherwise engaged while Kakashi paid Gai shifted himself around stretched out some tight muscles.
"Then I suppose it will okay. You will be well monitored and I won't have to worry too much. Provided Sakura doesn't say anything or spread any tales...Did you want to tell everyone you are pregnant down the line at all or say we adopted? Granted we are both rather distinctive looking in our own ways so there will be no denying paternity." Blushing lightly Gai felt the urge to shuffle his feet. "I hope she or he takes after you personally."
Kakashi had to actually think about that. He had assumed they would let everyone know it was their child, but he wouldn't enjoy the constant pestering he knew he would get, one question he was sure would crop up often (How did you conceive?) would greatly annoy him, he would just have to respond casually (The same way people usually do).
Gai was right, Kakashi thought as they got their sandals, they were both rather distinctive. Gai's last comment took him by surprise, and Kakashi found himself wishing Gai hadn't said it. "You've never..." Kakashi started awkwardly, he couldn't believe he'd just realized this.
"Actually, Gai," Kakashi said turning and beginning off into town, the opposite direction they needed to go, motioning Gai to follow Kakashi looked over his shoulder at the other man, "Let's go see my old house. I need to show you something." Kakashi realized it was going to hurt like hell going back there, but he knew it would make him feel better eventually... and he would be able to find a picture of his mother.
"What? Never what?" Gai was immediately on guard and weary. Following Kakashi Gai hoped for the best. Going to Kakashi's house was bound to bring up old memories and while Kakashi may be willing to go there Gai would have avoided if he could. As it stood he knew that Kakashi would feel some strong emotions tied to his child hood home and if at all possible Gai would have liked to lower the stress level for Kakashi and the baby. Making a mental note to remember them as two separate entities using the same vessel in order not to come off overly concerned about the baby when he wanted to know how Kakashi was Gai let his feet follow Kakashi.
"You've never met my family." Kakashi glanced back at Gai, accordingly, he had never met Gai's either. But he still had the chance, he thought, to meet Gai's living breathing family. Gai, however, could only meet pictures. Scrolls. And Kakashi's memories.
Kakashi paused in front of a rather large, winding, estate. Obviously from a time when his father had been 'The White Fang' not Hatake Sakumo. Minato had asked him once, Kakashi remembered, if there was a difference. To Kakashi the answer was simple. It wasn't so to Minato, who became upset with him. (Of course. I cared about White Fang).
It was why, in the end, he had used his fathers tanto.
Kakashi forced himself to move, to walked up the pathway, cracked with weeds growing through, leading to the front door, pausing he opened the door slowly. The house was old, unused, unloved. Musty. Kakashi inhaled carefully, before setting the boxes of leftovers on the cabinet inside the doorway.
Walking into the house he slipped his hands into his pockets. He didn't take his shoes of. The hard wood floors creaked underneath his feet, and he motioned vaguely toward the left side of the house, "The bedrooms are over there. The uh, tea room," he pointed to a door, that was closed securely, "is there." he hoped Gai knew better than to go in there, "Kitchen," Kakashi walked to a doorway, and looked inside, the windows were broken.
The house was deteriorating.
"I should..." Kakashi rubbed his nose slightly, "Follow me, we'll get some pictures." Kakashi said as he walked off toward the bedrooms.
For a moment Gai just stood in the hallway and took in the house. The atmosphere felt unbearable. Not able to resist Gai caught Kakashi's arm and pulled him into a quick hug. Kissing him on the cheek briefly before letting him go again.
"This place is going to seed. Do you want to fix it up?" Trying to pretend like his restraint hadn't temporarily deteriorated Gai regarded the floor for a moment. Then he began to cautiously look around, feeling with his chakra for any signs of life or malignant presences. Gai had experience with ghosts and while no one else had believed him Gai knew that like demons could walk the earth as men, ghosts could take life.
Sensing a presence in the tea room, Gai looked out the window to keep himself from going there. His nerves were screaming to grab Kakashi and go but Gai couldn't do it. There was a presence here and Gai knew from experience that once seen ghosts were always visible. Some ninja said they occasionally saw ghosts of the past but Gai knew that they meant figuratively. Those who had really seen them literally never mentioned the experience.
Kakashi was caught off guard when Gai caught hold of him, and kissed him. He waited until the man let him go to continue. Gai was affectionate. Almost unbearably so, but Kakashi expected he'd have to get used to it.
Stopping in a bedroom doorway, Kakashi hesitated on the threshold. It seemed cold in the house, too cold to be considered logical. "I've considered it." Kakashi admitted as he walked into the room, "But I always end up with the same conclusion." Kakashi went to the closet and removed a box, "What's the point?"
Going to the bed he sat down, and motioned Gai over. "I'll show you," he said softly as he tugged the lid off, "My mother and father." he picked a picture up from the top of the pile and looked at it for a moment, his expression softening slightly (his mother, so elegant and gorgeous. Tall, willowy, long luscious black hair. Alabaster skin, and beautiful green eyes. And then there was Sakumo. A startling resemblance between Kakashi and his father could be seen. The only difference one would note, was that Kakashi got his mothers oval face shape.)
"To eventually retire to. I imagine the dogs think they have it good at my place but this would be their heaven. I can respect your perspective though." Gai stood at the doorway of the bedroom for a time, he knew something was here. He felt it in the corners of the room. Shifting slightly Gai scanned the room one last time before he entered.
Sitting down next to Kakashi Gai looked at the picture thoughtfully. "Your mother and father were a handsome pair. What happened to your mother? There are a lot of rumors but nothing substantiated."
Kakashi hesitated, before speaking, as if it were painful to talk about. "I only know what Sakumo told me. I've never read her files." he admitted, though he'd had plenty of chances to do so. "Everyone thinks," Kakashi said as he placed the picture into the box, and lifting one of his mother smiling. Alone. "That I take after Sakumo. Never once have I ever heard anyone but Sarutobi-sama, compare me to my mother. And the only time he did so was when..." Kakashi glanced at Gai, smiling awkwardly, "I was ANBU. Not ANBU in title, but really, truly ANBU."
"My mother became ANBU. And like me, she seemed to belong. It was, as my father put it, her destiny. Not him. Not me."
Kakashi dropped the picture after a moment. "She disappeared one night. They thought she'd just run into trouble. That she was running late, as she was accustomed to do. But weeks, months passed. And she never came home. Her teammate, Goro, came back but they had gotten separated."
"I was three when I saw her last, after being proclaimed dead. She came to him, Gai. She came to see Sakumo." Kakashi set the box on the bed between them, sighing, "She didn't remember me." Shrugging slightly as if it didn't matter Kakashi moved a few of the pictures with his fingertips, "Sakumo told me a week later that she was dead. And as far as I know she was. Because that was the only time I ever saw him cry."
Rubbing his hand up and down Kakashi's back in a soothing gesture Gai glanced out of the corner of his eye and felt his heart slow down. There stood a woman in full ANBU gear with her black hair tied up and held in place by a few senbon. Gai knew as sure as he was breathing that she was Kakashi's mother. He also could tell that she meant them no harm. Her head moved around as though she was guarding them and for the first time since he entered the house Gai felt safe.
"I am sure that she cared about you more than you would ever know. Goro san may be able to shed light on the situation if it isn't classified still." Gai commented absentmindedly and took note when Kakashi's mother looked directly at him and nodded before flickering out.
Getting the feeling that someone was walking on his grave, Gai felt a weird pulse in the air and when Kakashi's mother appeared she made a sign with her hands that Gai immediately identified as a warning. Not being able to explain to Kakashi what was going to cause Gai's actions but knowing that it was necessary Gai stood up. He felt cold pulse by his ear and a message was planted in his subconscious.
"Let's take the pictures and go Kakashi. We can go over them more at home." Gai wanted to sound casual but the message was there in his head getting louder. There was a shimmer directly behind, Kakashi and then Gai was staring at Sakumo. For a moment Gai made eye contact with the imposing man who stood in formal attire. One of Sakumo's hands reached out to touch his son. A sad smile touching his lips before his head whipped around and Sakumo's hand went to the katana at his waist.
Picking up the box of pictures Gai grasped Kakashi's hand. "I'll jutsu us." Gai was enthusiastic and tried to act like nothing was wrong but a storm of black came through the door as Gai transported them away. For a moment he thought the blackness had caught them but then it was no more. Landing at the edge of his home lands Gai shook himself out and looked at Kakashi. "Uhmmm..." Trying to figure out a way to explain his feelings Gai settled for silence.
Kakashi felt strange. The unexplainable strange you get when something you don't understand is happening, and Gai's behavior wasn't helping. Kakashi had always wondered, he realized as Gai grabbed his hand, if his mother had died in the house as well.
He'd always assumed she had, because honestly, how else could Sakumo have known? Kakashi pulled his hand away from Gai. Kakashi just stared at the other man.
His father, his mother...
Would he too some day die in the cold embrace of the place that had been his house and home?
"I'm not a child anymore, Gai." Kakashi said as he slipped his hands into his pockets to hide the tremors that had been running through his body for several moments, though he was sure Gai had noticed. "You don't have to try to make me feel better about her."
Gai didn't understand, Kakashi knew now why she hadn't asked after him. He knew all too well what it was like to have the blackness of ANBU grabbing you tightly. Nothing touched you, and you touched no one.
ANBU couldn't love, it wasn't a part of them.
It wasn't a part of him.
Kakashi realized after a moment that he was scared. Scared he wouldn't be able to care for their child. Scared he would abandon them the way his mother had abandoned him and his father. But no, he told himself, he couldn't do that.
But in his heart... he knew he was capable of it.
"I was merely stating fact. I know you aren't a child." Shaking his head and knowing that he wouldn't be able to explain to Kakashi anything at the moment, Gai took the pictures and headed for the house. Walking in he set the pictures on the breakfast bar and got a drink. Not one to normally drink under regular circumstances, Gai sought the sweet and bitter oblivion that it offered.
Knowing he couldn't drink himself to drunk, Gai sipped at his glass after the initial shot. In his head Gai made plans to ward Kakashi's familial home and go in to figure out why those to ghosts were there and what that blackness was. Gai would bet a lot that whatever had happened tied into Kakashi's mother's death and Sakumo's own suicide. It was just too convenient and too obvious. There would have to be a lot of reading done and inevitably Gai would have to tell Kakashi about some things but Gai knew he would need someone who had been through the same things he himself had and could see them.
"Naruto should be back soon right?" Gai knew Naruto could see the ghosts. It was how the youth had survived such negligence.
Kakashi bristled at the mention of Naruto. In all honestly he had no idea. But he was sure if the boy was returning it wouldn't be for a while. "Not for a couple of years at least." Kakashi muttered as he stood beside the table, gazing down into the box.
It felt, to him, as if his whole day had been wasted. Going back to that house had been a mistake. Kakashi sat down as he pulled several pictures from the box, flipping through them,
Gai shrugged turning from Kakashi and walking into the living room. Sitting on the couch, Gai tried to think of someone else that could see the ghosts and that he would trust to go with him. "Weirdness is such a subjective term." Musing Gai scratched his chin before hopping up and beginning to do some jump jacks hoping to get the blood going and maybe figure out more about what he was going to do with Kakashi's ancestral abode.
Standing up he tossed the pictures on the table, rubbing his eyes tiredly he got a glass of water, and quickly drank it before walking into the living room, "I'm gonna lay down Gai." he said as he slipped his hands into his pockets, "I'm still tired from my mission."
Kakashi paused, awkwardly, "Weren't you tired? I thought you'd been heading to bed before we went to see Tsunade-sama?" Kakashi sounded slightly, just barely, apologetic.
"I'll be in momentarily." Gai paused in his jumping jacks. "Do you want a massage?" Lowering himself to the ground Gai began to do push ups.
Kakashi watched Gai for a moment before shaking his head, "No thank you." he said strangely formal, as he waved slightly at Gai, "I'll be fine." Running his fingers through his hair Kakashi made his way into the bedroom, stripping down he slipped into bed, Kakashi couldn't help but wonder if Gai's interest in his family was completely... normal.
Then he reminded himself that nothing about them was normal.