Author's Notes: Thanks very much for your reviews! The more reviews I read, the more stories I'm inspired to write! This one references the crystals utilized in the episode "Gwaine."

Hurt and Comfort in Camelot

PenPatronus

Story 7

Death Wish

It was supposed to be a brief hunting trip. Easy. Uneventful. But, as usual, Merlin and Arthur ended up running for their lives.

Well, Merlin was running. Arthur was limping. He claimed that the tree root he tripped over came out of nowhere.

"Heavy," Merlin gasped. "You… are… too… heavy…"

"I don't even have my chainmail on!" Arthur hissed through clenched teeth. He tried, again, to put weight on his sprained left ankle but stars exploded across his vision. Merlin tightened his grip around his waist and on the arm wrapped across his neck. "Merlin, we're a league away from Camelot. If you leave me here, you'll go twice as fast. Get the knights and come back."

"Sorry," said Merlin without a whiff of apology in his voice, "but as usual, you're stuck with me, Arthur."

"They're on horseback. They'll be here in minutes. Merlin, for God's sake, what's the point in both of us getting captured?"

"Morgana wants to kill you, Arthur! I can't let her catch you." Horses whinnied in the distance, behind them and in front. Merlin turned left and yanked Arthur down into a ditch behind a tree blossoming with the first spring buds.

Arthur massaged his ankle. Sweat coated his skin and soaked right through his thin white tunic. "We're surrounded." Merlin suddenly snatched a dagger out of Arthur's belt. "What are you doing?"

Merlin thrust his arm elbow-deep into his pack. "Arthur, do you trust me?"

"Why are you ask-"

"I need you to trust me right now. Can you do that?"

"I suppose, but – Merlin, ow! What the hell-" Arthur cradled his right hand. Blood dripped from an inch-long slice in his palm.

"Trust me, trust me," Merlin muttered. He held the knife above a crystal hanging from a gold chain and dropped a speck of Arthur's blood onto the tip. He then cut his own hand and splattered his own blood on a second crystal. "I'm going to loop this through your belt," he said, holding the crystal up to Arthur's nose, "and hide it in your trousers. Whatever happens, don't take it off."

"Merlin this is not the time to worry about hiding some jewelry you stole…" Arthur felt a pinch behind his eyes the moment the crystal touched his skin. His limbs tingled as if falling asleep. He looked down at his hands and swore that his skin's color and texture changed. "Merlin, what's going on?"

"I'll be you and you'll be me," Merlin said as he tied the first crystal to his own belt. "If Gaius' theory is right about how to work these things then all we have to do is add blood and…" Merlin dropped the crystal down his shorts and, faster than Gwaine could down a jug of mead, his body transformed into the exact likeness of Arthur Pendragon.

The real Arthur pressed himself flat against the tree at his back. "Magic? Magic that makes you look like me?"

His own smile grinned back at him. "And you like me," Merlin said. "Just an illusion. Remember to keep that crystal on you at all times." Arthur ran his hand through his hair and felt the stiff, scraggily locks of a servant. "I never realized how handsome I am," Merlin quipped.

Arthur frowned, frowned so deep that his eyebrows touched. "Merlin, what's the point of –" He realized then, what Merlin was thinking, and reached out and grabbed him by the scruff his own neck. "If Morgana thinks you're me she'll kill you, Merlin, she'll kill you."

Merlin shrugged and said, softly, "Better me than you."

"No, Merl—" The King's sentence was cut off by a wave of magic that lifted them both into the air and launched them twenty yards away.

Morgana found them.

The last thing Arthur recalled before he passed out was the sorceress leaning over Merlin with her hands around his throat.

Merlin was beyond surprised when he woke up. He didn't expect to be alive, let alone conscious and in one piece, minus the headache. The sorcerer tried to roll over but a sharp pain in his gut stopped him. He groaned, pulled his arms beneath his chest and pushed up. His left wrist was stiff and the fingers refused to do anything more than be a fist. He landed on his back, hugging his stomach and staring, wide eyed, at the scene around him. Sunlight illuminated the mud and moss interior of Morgana's forest hut. Since his last visit, she'd constructed a prison cell half the size of Merlin's bedroom. Two Percival-sized guards glared down at him from the other side of the iron bars and, behind them, Morgana sat at a table enjoying a meal of bread and berries.

Merlin almost said "Arthur" but stopped himself in time. Instead he whispered his own name, trying to sound as Arthur-ish as possible. The warlock stretched his arms and legs and moved them in a fanning motion as if making a snow angel. The middle finger of his right hand brushed against something soft but solid and Merlin immediately crawled in that direction. He found boots, legs, and arms and – it was going to be hard to get used to – his own face. Arthur was pale and his eyes were closed. Merlin's head-ache turned into a head-throb, then. His eyes felt like gongs hammered by a giant.

He wormed his hands up to Arthur's face and poked his cheek until he woke up. "Wake up, Merlin," he said pointedly when his friend's eyes fluttered open. "If I have to suffer such unbearable accommodations, so do you!"

"Accommodations," Morgana laughed. She tossed a blackberry into her mouth and made a show of enjoying the taste. "I must admit, brother, sometimes I miss your pompous ignorance. So very much has changed these past few years but your attitude is resolute. Somehow, I find comfort in that."

"So happy to help, sister." Merlin helped Arthur sit up with his back against the moss-covered wall and whispered, "Everything's going to be all right. How's your ankle?"

Arthur, wearing Merlin's face, struggled to find the right words. "I'm all right… Sire."

Morgana's chair scraped the floor when she stood up. "Welcome back, Merlin," she said, joining her guards at the bars. "You and I had so much fun the last time you were here I thought you'd want to come again."

"Last time?"

Morgana slid her thumb and forefinger up and down the bars. "Your screams were so delicious," she said, "I reminisce about them every night. Helps me sleep." Arthur's eyes widened. Merlin knew it was out of surprise and suspicion but Morgana interpreted it as fear. Her smile stretched and she ordered the guards to open the door. Merlin expected her to march right up to him but she strutted to Arthur. "What a loyal servant you are," she cooed. The witch took Arthur's chin in her hand and shook it like an infant's. "The king treats you like dirt yet, here you are, by his side."

Arthur's eyes flitted between Morgana and Merlin. "I always am," he said gradually.

Merlin wondered if that was the first time Arthur ever realized that.

"You're such a fool, Merlin, to be loyal to someone just because he's a king," Morgana cooed. "It's almost sad, honestly, that he's so fond of you. Because now I'm going to torture you while he watches."

Merlin's stomach – or was it Arthur's? – dropped into his boots. All the trouble he went through with the crystals and still Arthur was going to get hurt? What would Arthur do? he asked himself. Merlin did the only thing he could think of. He gathered every drop of moisture in his mouth and spit. He aimed for Morgana's hair.

He got her cheek.

Morgana shrieked and smacked him across the mouth. Then she grabbed him by the throat and slammed his head against the wall. "So you want to go first, Your Majesty? Very well." The guards lifted Merlin to his feet by the armpits and dragged him outside the cell. The same rope as before hanged Merlin, in Arthur's skin, by his wrists. He took a deep breath and willed himself to look like Arthur: brave, stubborn, unafraid of pain. It was even more difficult not to look the real Arthur in the eye.

Slowly, almost sensually, Morgana unbuttoned his shirt. She said nothing. No taunts. No threats. The air thickened with tension, suspense. Merlin almost wished for insults, for anything to distract him from whatever she was about to do. Somehow her silence was louder than words.

He took that thought back immediately.

When she did speak, it was a spell.

Arthur wouldn't wish this on his worst enemy, let alone his best friend. It looked like a million red ants crawled out from the tips of Morgana's fingers, marched across Merlin's chest and into the skin at the crest of his collarbone. At first his reaction was wide eyes. Then his body convulsed – his back arching in half, lifting his feet off the ground. His face went from pale to bright red in seconds and in that same amount of time sweat formed and dripped from every pore. Sweat that blushed and turned red. Red as blood… It was blood. Merlin's screams were so loud, so high-pitched that Arthur plugged his ears. The yell became a hiccup-cough-groan almost instantly.

Merlin had already screamed himself hoarse.

With a last look at Arthur his eyes rolled back into his skull and his body became limp.

Arthur grabbed the prison bars and shook them with all his strength. "Stop it!" he shouted. "Morgana, stop!"She did, and Arthur wasn't sure who was more surprised: him, her, the Percival-sized guards or Merlin. "Don't hurt him. He's not Arthur. I'm Arthur. He just looks at me because of magic."

Morgana snorted. "That's your plan for saving your master, Merlin? You make up a ridiculous lie so that you can take his place? I see no magic here and I'm the only one in this room who has magic!"

Arthur reached for the gold chain around his belt. "That's exactly what Merlin did. He took my place. And I won't let him die for me." He yanked out the crystal and threw it against the wall.

Morgana's jaw dropped as she watched Merlin's body morph into Arthur's. "What spell is this?" she whispered, mostly to herself. She turned back to the Arthur hanging from her rope. After a quick search she found an identical chain, an identical crystal. She dropped it to the floor and smashed it beneath her boot. The bleeding Arthur transformed into a bleeding Merlin. She snatched his chin between her thumb and forefinger and examined his face. "Where did you fools get –"

An arrow burst through the window and pierced a guard's heart. He fell in front of his companion, tripping him as he grabbed for a sword. Morgana ducked beside the fireplace as a second arrow came through another window. The guard dodged that one but a third hit his hip. He grabbed Morgana's elbow and led her out a back door just as the Knights of Camelot busted through the front. Lancelot broke Arthur free and he immediately started shouting orders: "Gwaine, help me with Merlin. The rest of you, after her!" The knights obeyed. Arthur rushed over to Merlin and untied the ropes while Gwaine held the young servant steady.

"I don't understand," Gwaine said when he saw the blood still leaking from every pore in Merlin's unconscious body. "Morgana had you, Arthur. Why did she hurt him?"

Arthur broke through the last knot and the two men gently lowered Merlin to the floor. "Let's get him back to Camelot," Arthur said, his jaw set and stony. "He can ride with me."

"It's a good thing you didn't die," said a voice in Merlin's ear, "because I want to kill you." The sorcerer pried his eyes open and found Arthur upside down and staring at him. His eyelids felt heavy – like gold coins lay on them. He licked his lips and found rough scabs that scratched his tongue. Before he had to ask Arthur held a cup to his lips and Merlin emptied it one drop at a time. He was in his room, in bed. His head lay on a pillow and the pillow lay on Arthur's lap.

Merlin lifted his hand to his nose and saw thousands of scabs the size of pinpricks. "What did she do to me?" he whispered.

"Something we don't have a name for," said Arthur in a flat voice. "Gaius doesn't even have a theory. You were sweating blood, Merlin."

"Do I have any left?" Merlin asked, attempting a half-joke and coming off sounding serious.

A minute passed and the two men went back and forth between looking at each other and avoiding the other's eyes. Finally Arthur spat, "Merlin, do you have a bloody death wish?"

Merlin blinked. "No."

"Well, it must be my mistake, then," Arthur said with anger on the edge of his voice. "Because it seems like every time we're in a life-or-death situation, Merlin, you try to choose death."

"I don't have a death wish, Arthur," Merlin said softly. "I have a life wish – for you."

"And don't you think I have a – a life wish for you, too?" Arthur's voice went up an octave. "You're so bloody busy protecting me; did it ever occur to that teeny brain that I want to protect you?"

Merlin didn't try to get out of Arthur's grasp, but he did turn his head and bury his nose against Arthur's knee, breaking their eye contact. "You shouldn't."

"I should. I'm to rule over Camelot, protect its citizens and you, Merlin, are a citizen of Camelot." Arthur gently scratched Merlin's black hair. "An important citizen of Camelot."

Merlin patted Arthur's knee. He said nothing.

"I'm sorry. You're recovering. I shouldn't yell at you… now."

Merlin sighed. "If it will make you feel better, yell away."

"See, that's what I'm talking about," Arthur snarled. "I swear, if I actually did give you the option to take a day off or clean the army's boots, you'd grab a rag without a thought."

"Don't be silly. I'd rather die than clean three hundred pairs of boots that smell even worse than yours."

Arthur didn't let him change the subject. "Please, my friend," he whispered. His fingers returned to Merlin's hair and Merlin tightened his grip on Arthur's knee. "I mean it when I say that you are…" he gathered his courage to say the word and still winced when he said it, "…precious to me. Remember that I care about you as much as you care about me. I would die for you as you would for me. When we face death we do so together."

Arthur would've gotten even angrier if he knew what Merlin was thinking: had it been a mistake to befriend Arthur? It made it easier to protect him because they were around each other more, but it also put him in more danger because he would focus on Merlin's safety instead of his own. Would it be better to distance himself? Merlin wondered. Better if he was just another faceless servant instead of a valued friend? It wouldn't be better for him, personally, but would it be for Arthur's life?

Merlin thought he understood what it meant to sacrifice himself for Arthur.

He'd just discovered a whole new obstacle.

One he would deal with in the morning.

"Don't have to go anywhere, do you?" Merlin whispered to Arthur.

"No. I can stay here with you."

"All right. Just… just until I fall asleep again."

"I'll still be here when you wake up." And he was, his hands still cradling Merlin's head in his lap.

The End