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You are visiting Ella's Blog: Summer Vacation with the Flock. Welcome!
Hits: 7010
Date: Sometime during summer vacation.
Day Thirteen: Sunday 10:31 AM
I just watched Never Wanted to Dance by Mindless Self Indulgence. I want to be in a music video people can dance to! And I want to learn to backbend. While, like, holding a bass guitar. With the frontman's hair. Nudge thinks it's anti-gravitational because he's a mutant.
Does anyone want to know how the slumber party went?
Okay then, I'll get Max to tell you.
MAX'S BLOG
By Max.
Well, first of all I was rudely WOKEN UP by five hyperactive girls at EIGHT TWENTY in the MORNING with JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE playing on the stereo.
Then I was BUNDLED INTO THE SHOWER. Again, I might add. With a razor. And shampoo. I already washed my hair this week!
Once I was done in the shower, I was AMBUSHED as I walked into Ella's room and was forced to sit on a SQUISHY PILLOW THAT HATED ME for hours on end while we played 'TRUTH OR DARE', 'MARRY, SCREW, THROW OFF A CLIFF' and 'IF THE WORLD ENDED, WHO WOULD YOU RATHER BE WITH?'…
I would like to point out that Fang would be PERFECTLY FINE if I threw him off a cliff.
Yes, I am overusing caps-lock. Stop laughing, Ella.
Then came the good bit when we ATE COOKIES (no I will not stop) and TEASED ELLA.
Afterwards I was ATTACKED WITH MAKEUP while supposedly brushing Lorraine's hair. Except I brushed too hard and a load of her hair came out. OOPS.
Because I was forbidden to leave the Cave of Slumber I got TWENTY QUESTIONS on my DATE WITH FANG and was grilled about VEGAS and ELVIS PRESLEY. Like he isn't already DEAD. So no, we did not see him while we MADE OUT IN OUR HOTEL ROOM.
Oh crap, I really did just type that.
Ella, please can I stop-?
Damn it.
Then I was FORCED by ANGEL to partake in a PEDICURE and MANICURE. I also had to stick my head over a bowl of steaming water to unclog my pores. I DO NOT HAVE CLOGGED UP PORES!
What exactly are pores?
I'm sure Ella will fill you in on the rest, so I'm going now.
You do not get a kiss goodbye.
EllA
I'm back!
Max has obviously been playing with the valium again. That or she's as hooked on MSI as I am.
Anyway, she can stop having a nervous breakdown and go out with Fang now because Christine and Lorraine left an hour ago.
We're having pizza tonight and I have to place my order now before Gazzy burns the menu.
Pizza Facts
On average, Americans eat one hundred acres of pizza a day, which amounts to three hundred and fifty slices per second.
The highest consumption of pizza occurs during Super Bowl week.
Cookie Facts
The chocolate chip cookie was invented in 1933 by Ruth Wakefield in her and her husband's inn in Massachusetts.
The average American eats 35,000 cookies in their lifetime. Max can top that.
Coffee Facts
Decaffeinated coffee is not one hundred per cent caffeine free, as two per cent caffeine remains in it. Just another piece of evidence that the government is behind a conspiracy to take over the world with nice tasting food and drink.
Comments
Gazz: Menu + Lighter = Ash.
FlyHighInTheSky: Now I know why I'm hyper even when I have the de-caff.
BlondeAndBeaming: Max actually really enjoyed the slumber party.
LorraineHeartsBacktotheFuture: Totally! Even when we sang "Max and Fang, sitting in a tree…"
NuDgE: Of course she loved it. She just won't admit it for another three books.
Max_R: Can you please stop discussing my emotions on a goddamn slumber party that I didn't even enjoy?
Dr.M: You did have a good time, sweetie. Don't swear.
Max_R: Sorry.
You are visiting Ella's Blog: Summer Vacation with the Flock. Welcome!
Hits: 7064
Date: Sometime during summer vacation.
Day Thirteen: Sunday 6:18 PM
Hahahahahaha!
You'll never believe what happened this afternoon…
The Gasman had indeed set fire to the menu so we had to order pizza for lunch instead of dinner (in case we forgot our orders. Not that that would be hard, as the average request is: 'Large. With everything').
The doorbell rang and we all rushed to answer it and claim our feasts, Total biting ankles to get there first. The fun part came when Iggy opened the door to let in the pizza delivery guy and Max bolted through us at the speed of light and hurtled into the delivery man, knocking him to the ground (and more importantly) sending the pizza flying into the French windows, where they made a 'splat' sound and slid down the window, just like in movies.
We all stood there for maybe thirty seconds, staring in disbelief at Max, whose sweatshirt was covered in tomato sauce and the delivery man, who was gaping like a fish due to Max slamming into his stomach at forty miles an hour.
Had Max become bipolar? Was she on cocaine? Had she discovered Mom's drinks' cabinet?
No.
She had mistaken him for a German scientist.
Roland ter Borcht hadn't entered the United States, but his lookalike had.
Max had mistaken a lovely, slightly portly middle-aged gentleman who delivered pizzas for an evil, sick, Deutsch maniac who needed a padded cell. And reacted as any fourteen-year-old mutant hybrid with wings and Converse would.
I thought moments in my life were embarrassing.
Comments
Max_R: I'm sorry! I just saw him, and flipped. Let's hear it for years of living in a cage, people.
V0iCE: Hip hip, hooray!
Fang: She was being sarcastic.
IMustBeWEmo: Three cheers for sweet revenge!
I'mNotToto: Guys, what do you think of Akila and I getting hitched in Vegas? Did I mention we're getting married? This summer. Soon. Very soon. Sorry bitchez, but you'll just have to find another celebrity dawg to drool over. I suggest Pete Wentz's pet, Hemmingway. For all you bent gals, Mikey Way's dog Piglet. She's cute, in a walrusy sort of way.
BlondeAndBeaming: Total, your language has gone waaaaaay down since you started listening to Eminem.