All's Fair reedited and continued

by Wren Elessedil Dragonsbane

This is a story about love between men in a time of war. Collab with ReiXGaara. There will be OOCness but we think it all works out. There will be violence, non consent/reluctance, language. Please if you are offended easily take our warning and pass by.

7. Day Five Pains of Waking

All's Fair Chapter Five

A/N: (Here it is the long awaited fifth chapter of all's fair. I'm sorry it took so long I was waiting for something to happen that never did so I took it into my own hands and have delivered it to you. I hope you enjoy and please review so I know you want more.)

This is a collaboration between myself and ReiXGaara. She has it posted under her name but I am re-posting it for this reason. ReiXGaara's life has taken her to new highs and she is to busy to continue with this story so I will be going it alone. I'm re-editing all the chapters and have a couple more to post as collab chapters but then it will be all my own. This story means a lot to me and I want to see it finished. I know the story and the end is clear in my mind it's just the journey to get there that my take some time.

Disclaimer: We don't own the Naruto characters and we don't make money from our dirty stories…yet…

Warning: Yaoi, that's man on man sex, violence, non consent/reluctance, language.

Played By

ReiXGaara-Genma, Iruka, Izumo, Hayate

Wren Elessedil Dragonsbane- Tenzou, Raidou, Kakashi, Kotetsu

Hey! If you're not 18, stop reading please!

Part one – Pains of Waking

"Alright, Second. Get your asses in gear and to the mess."

Genma groaned as Tenzou's voice filtered into his exhausted mind. His body was so sore but he didn't regret a thing. His memories of getting home last night were hazy but he remembered waking to Kakashi kissing the back of his neck and running his hands down his arm. Kakashi had whispered to him that it was past lights out and that he needed to get back to his barracks. Genma had moaned as Kakashi kissed him and helped pull some soft clothes onto his body and he'd looked down to see a navy shirt, as nice as the one Kakashi had destroyed on his chest. A pair of designer jeans that were rather tight and too long on him on his legs. His shaking body straightened as the older man gripped his chin and brought their mouths together again.

Somehow he'd managed get back to his bunk and stripped of the expensive clothes before crawling under the covers. Sleep took him quickly and seemed too short as he pulled the sheet over his head to block out the lieutenant's yelling.

"Shiranui," Tenzou walked over to Genma's bunk and gave his covered shoulder a good shove. "I don't know where you disappeared to last night, Sergeant, but whatever it was doesn't excuse you from waking with the rest of your platoon. Spike, Wheezy, Mutt and Butterfly have already left for desert conditioning. You didn't even twitch when Spike tried to say goodbye," the lieutenant said as he watched as his boyfriend pulled on a shirt. There first night... moments as a couple and they fight, then Iruka cheats on him. 'Not really a good sign' he told himself. Tenzou turned back to Genma when his only reply was a pained grunt. There were red stains on Genma's sheets from where they'd pressed against his back during the night. "What the fuck?" Tenzou cursed quietly as he tore back Genma's sheet. His back was covered with bandages he was sure he could see that pattern of a couple numbers in the stains that had leaked through the bandages. He grabbed Genma's shoulder and turned him to his side. "Holy shit, Gen!" he said kneeling beside the injured man with wide eyes.

Genma's eyes darted to Iruka who was still avoiding looking at Tenzou before locking on the lieutenant's serious gaze. "I'm okay, Sir," he whispered, "It's nothing. I'll be okay." His eyes pleaded with Tenzou not to make a big deal about it, at least when the rest of the group was still slowly filing out of the tent. He tried to sit up but quickly fell back to the mattress with a hiss of pain. He noticed Neji's all seeing, white eyes on him as he glanced around the room but no one else seemed to notice his injuries. He looked back into the navy eyes helplessly, pleading for the man to leave him be, at least until the tent had cleared.

Tenzou pulled the sheet back over Genma and walked over to Neji casually. He spoke in quiet tones using hand gestures to appear to be talking about training or some sort of exercise "Would you mind staying behind after the others have left? I think I might need your help getting Genma to the infirmary. It's not an order, it is a choice but keeping quiet about what you saw is." Tenzou patted Neji on the shoulder then walked away to his own bunk to gather up his supplies appearing to anyone else that he is going about his normal day.

Genma stayed very still as he listened to the footsteps of people exiting the tent. When there was finally silence around him he felt the sheet over his head being pulled down again, surprised to see not one but two pairs of eyes on him. He looked up into Neji's pale gaze, the eyes wide with surprise as they took in his injuries.

"Christ, sir." The pale man said no more as he and Tenzou helped Genma to his feet. The blond groaned in protest but held onto Neji as Tenzou helped pull clothes onto his body.

"Thanks, Pearl." He whispered as he dropped his head onto the pale shoulder in exhaustion, his body barely able to hold its own weight even with the two men's help. Finally his body was clothed and he looked at Tenzou for what he was supposed to do. He didn't want to go to the infirmary but he would never be able to train this morning.

"Sorry Shiranui but I have no choice, you are going to the infirmary" Tenzou said in a firm voice rather pissed that this had happened. He could tell by the numbers that he could make out who had done this. "Don't say shit about who did this to you. Do you understand, Genma?" Tenzou snapped as he adjusted Genma's weight to open the flap and check that no one from the platoon was outside.

"Don't worry, Sir. I had no intentions of it." He glanced at Neji who was eying his swollen cheek in a thoughtful manner. 'It won't take long for the Hyuuga genius to figure out who did this,' Genma surmised as Neji's hands tightened on him a little. "Alright then, let's get this over with."

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Her bright red hair was in a tight braid this morning to keep the desert wind from blowing it her face and aggravating her. Ms. E had enough to try her patients this morning. She had already been in three arguments with her employer, the young Captain was in a right foul mood and didn't seem to think he should have to do his work today. It was Wren's job to make sure he did it anyway that is what she had been hired for, at least the man was smart enough to know that he needed help.

Finally after an hour of arguing while she sorted papers in his tent she was able to convince Kakashi that there was just to many important files they needed to get done in the next week before Raidou made his run to the main base for supplies, that recopying his crap hand writing on a psych eval was not a priority and if he wanted it done so badly then he would have to find someone else.
A wicked smirk twisted Wren's lips as she made her way to the infirmary to pass the job off the her most hated rival, Nurse Joy -ask Namiashi so bitterly named her-. She had taken a look at the eval and it was no warm sunny memory that the soft hearted nurse would have to read through.
"Ahhh just the bitch I was hoping to find standing around doing nothing," she said was sarcasm in her voice as she walked up the Rei standing outside the med tent with a cigarette in her hand.
Rei rolled her eyes as her dropped her half finished smoke to the ground and ground it out in the sand. "And what would a nasty slut like you being looking for me for?" the dark haired nurse replied with more then a little bitterness in her tone.

"Watch your mouth little girl I my not be your boss but that doesn't mean I can't make your life here even more like hell," Wren bite back and held out the folder containing Private Umino's psych eval. "Like right now your day just got a whole lot worse." There was that wicked smirk on Wren's lips again as Rei's reached out and took the offered folder. "Captain Hatake, wishes for you to have this copied and back on his desk by the end of the day. It is very sensitive information and for some reason the man thinks you are trust worthy enough to handle this," Ms. E's tone was mocking and with a wicked little chuckle she turned and started to walk away. "I took a look at it and you know it's just goes to show once again that being the goody goody just doesn't pay."
Rei gave a heavy sigh as she looked down that the folder in her hand and read the words 'psych evaluation'. "Shit I don't deserve this," she groused and walked into the tent to her desk.

Rei leaned on her elbow heavily as she read the next paragraph of the horrific and very sloppily written report. Chewing on her pen she shook her head at the terrible things that people could do to one another.

"Hey, Rei, can I bring you back a coffee or something to eat?"

The brunette looked up and smiled at her co-worker. "A coffee would be amazing, Sakura. Thank you. What a way to start the day. Don't bring any food back here if you can help it. I think I'm going to be sick. It would be easier on me if Ms. E would just teach Kakashi how to write properly." Sakura just laughed sadly and headed for the entrance to the tent. "Hey! Tell at least one of the medics to get their asses back here. None of us should have to cover for them so they can eat breakfast together." The pink haired woman waved as she ducked out into the sun just as Tenzou stepped into the tent. Rei dropper her eyes back to the report as she greeted him.

"Morning Zou." she shook her head again and sighed sadly. "What a world we live in. Poor guy," she whispered more to herself then to Tenzou.

"Yeah we could use some help with him. If we can I would like to keep this discreet," Tenzou said as he and Neji got Genma to the first bed and sat him down. Tenzou looked up at the brunette nurse and realized that she was busy and hadn't processed his words yet, but he also noticed that she looked disturbed and her eyes were red like she had been crying or trying hard not to. "Rei Are you okay?"

Her free hand massaged her very sore shoulders and continued copying. "I hate this. I shouldn't even have to look at these as a nurse but the lead prick's handwriting is so bad that it has to be rewritten and I'm one of the few who can read it. So now I'm copying psych evals which are scarring me emotionally and reaffirming my belief that men are the worst scum of the earth. I mean honestly, how is it enjoyable or any kind of release to kick the shit out of someone?" Sighing she set down her pen and pushed the report away from her. "Enough of that for now, what did you need help-JESUS CHRIST!!!!!" Her eyes had finally landed on Genma and she knocked over the chair behind the desk as she rushed over to his side and pushed the sandy hair out of his face so she could inspect the damage.

"Pearl, thank you for your help and remember your orders, not a fucking word about this." Tenzou said with his hand on Neji's shoulder. He waited for the dark haired man to leave before he turned back to Rei again. "This is to be kept as secret as possible. I don't care if you have to lie and say a wild dog attacked him, this is to remain quiet." Tenzou hated lying, he hated half truths he strove to be honest in all things but this was the Captain and it would hurt the camp in a time of war if such a thing was made public.

"Okay, easy," Rei cooed as she helped Genma ease his arm out of his shirt her eyes catching the too perfect cuts on his pecks and shoulders. Her brows furrowed as she realized that they were made with a knife. "Why would it have to remain quiet, Zou? I don't want whatever maniac who did this running around the camp. Lean forward." She pulled the shirt the rest of the way off, her fingers touching the bandages on his back as she eased him forward. Scowling in confusion she lifted the dirty gauze away carefully, her mouth dropping open in shock as she read the number that was carved into the skin. The number of her most hated man, the number of the man whose report she was just rewriting. "No fucking way!" She eased Genma back onto the pillow and pulled the curtains around him before grabbing Tenzou's arm and jerking him out of the area. "He can't keep doing this! Have you taken a look at that man? He's got fucking knife cuts on his chest and he's black and blue. He can't even stand!" Her eyes narrowed as she thought about the last time one of Kakashi's victims had been here a few months ago, the man's ass torn open from the brutal fucking. "He's crossed a line. None of the others have been this bad. I have to write this up. If I don't and he ends up killing someone..."

"He won't kill anyone" Tenzou hissed, then let out a long sigh realizing his anger was misplaced. "Rei we are at war, this isn't just a training camp in peace time we are at war and this camp needs its Captain to be larger than life to keep morals up. If it is found out they are being lead by a psycho it will not be good for the men. They'll lose faith in what they are fighting for." Tenzou placed his hands on Rei's shoulders, "I know you can't forgive the Captain for what he did to him, but he told you himself it wasn't rape. I'm not sure how well he understands what rape is and what's not, but if he is willing to get back up and act like nothing happened then we have to respect that. He didn't want anyone to know and not just for himself but for the company. You know he doesn't normally do things for himself." Tenzou looked sad and worn.

The big green eyes slid closed and two tears skimmed down the creamy cheeks, but when they opened the steely resolve of the young nurse was back. "You fucking tell him to read through that report he just sent me and then think about what he did to that sergeant. If it happens again...I'm not covering for his psychotic ass anymore." She moved to the shelves along the front of the tent and began grabbing icepacks and bandages before moving back to Genma. "Flip onto your stomach and we'll check out the damage."

Genma groaned and weakly manoeuvred his body so that his ass was facing up, cringing as the latex gloved fingers parted his cheeks. "It's okay, really. I told him he could do whatever he wanted." He hissed in pain as she gently prodded his torn hole.

"Does that make it right? This should have had stitches last night but it's too late now. Absolutely no sex until this heals completely and I'm putting you on a soft food diet for three days. Don't argue!" she snapped when Genma opened his mouth to protest. "Fucking Hatake. And do you have a death wish or something? Why would you invite that kind of abuse? Don't you have any self preservation?" Genma didn't respond, not really knowing how. He just laid there as she very carefully patched him up. "You're here for at least a full twelve hours. I may make it twenty four depending on how you're doing." She looked into his eyes as he flipped over to give her access to the cuts on his chest, readjusting the icepack on his face. He looked at Tenzou for back up but saw clearly that he wasn't going to get any.

"Whatever you say, Miss." Rei nodded and gently prodded his abdomen and ribs, looking for internal injuries. Genma winced when she applied pressure to certain areas that were extra tender.

"I think your bottom rib is cracked...and..." She let out a long sigh of relief. "It looks like its only heavy bruising. You're very lucky. You could have ruptured an organ with the force of that hit to your stomach." She laid another icepack on his abdomen and quickly bandaged the rest of the cuts. "Okay, I need a minute to get my head together. I'll be back." She patted Genma's leg before moving out of the curtains, closing them tight behind her.

Tenzou took a seat on the edge of the bed careful to make sure he didn't disturb Genma's position "Genma, are you going to go back to him for more?" Tenzou cringed at asking such a personal question it wasn't really any of his business; well at least it shouldn't be, but if Genma's sex life is affecting the platoon then it is his business. "When we talked about this the other day I really thought he had gotten better and that you wouldn't be stupid enough to get yourself hurt like this." He rubbed his hands over his face in frustration "Why would you let him do this to you?"

Sighing, Genma turned his head so that the battered side of his face was resting against the pillow. "It was never like this before. I don't know what was wrong with him but he obviously needed to let something out." He shifted his eyes but kept most of his swollen cheek hidden as he locked gazes with Tenzou. "I'm pretty tough. I can take it. What if he'd laid this on someone who couldn't handle it?" Closing his eyes he gave a little chuckle. "I'll be the first to admit that this was pretty rough, rougher than I'd expected, but as crazy as it sounds I like that sort of thing. A little bit of danger is exciting but usually there are rules. Safewords and stuff like that."

The words Kakashi had hissed to him last night were pulled to the front of his memory. "There are no safewords in my game." A shiver ran through him and he had to shift his position to hide it. "We don't have rules. Just his rules. I trust him enough not to kill me but I guess that's not really enough since I'm here." He gestured to the white curtains around his bed and looked at Tenzou, begging for the man to tell him what to do.

"Genma, look at you. You are beaten to shit. Imagine what seeing you like this will do to Iruka, it's going to freak him out and break his heart that you let this happen to yourself." He sighed "You are the Sergeant in charge of 2nd platoon you need to be with your men, how can you train them if you are in the hospital unable to leave because your rectum had to be stitched. Look, the last man Kakashi put in here was a much stronger man than you and he was here for a week his ass was so torn. You don't want that. Do you?" Tenzou looked up quickly as panic rushed through him. There was no way someone could want that was there?

"You're right. Of course you're right. I guess I wasn't really thinking about the big picture." Sighing Genma raked a hand over his face. "I don't know if this will make any sense to you but...I want to be the best for him. I guess...I guess deep down, part of me wants to be the one he changes for, even though I don't think he'll change." He glanced at Tenzou, making sure that what they were speaking about was indeed confidential. When a nod reassured him he continued. "This will sound even crazier but I wanted him even before I got here. He's kind of the reason why I came to this company. Let's just say his reputation preceded him in all respects. And...And I actually do like it when he's...forceful with me. He's...gods, I don't know. He's special to me in some way. Beyond infatuation, more like an obsession. I want to be the best he's had so that he doesn't mess around with anyone else, especially anyone from our platoon."

"Shit, That's pretty messed up Genma" Tenzou said in a disbelieving voice and a shake of his head. He sat quiet for a few long minutes thinking over all he had learned. He gave a long sigh and got off the bed, turning he spoke his mind "You want to change him so you can be with him, the only way to get that man to change his ways is for the good of the company. You want safe words or no beatings then explain to him that you need these things or there is no deal because you won't put your own sex life above the training of your men. Train him in disguise of benefiting his company. Plus making yourself hard to get will keep his interest better than anything you could offer him." He walked over to the curtain and looked out then back to Genma "I'm going to check on Rei." He was about to walk through the curtain when he stopped and in a firm voice touched with anger he said "When you are thinking about what to do about all this, Genma, remember the hurt you have already cause your friends with your lust by bring them here."

It was like a sharp slap to the face or a kick to his already bruised gut. He wanted to tell the lieutenant that it was more than just lust that brought him here. He thought his men were the best and he wanted them to fight with the best. Easy company had the most prestigious record of any other company in the entire army. He'd wanted to share in that glory and for his men to fight with him. But he didn't correct the older man as he felt he really deserved a lot of that. It had been him that had urged the men of his training group to join him. Brothers in arms, they followed him without question, just like they would in battle. 'I've fucked everything up for them. How could I have been so selfish in the first place and then been selfish again by letting Kakashi put me out of commission. Never again. They deserve more from me than that, all of them.' He turned on his side and closed his eyes; sleep quickly over taking him again.

Tenzou walked outside the tent when he didn't find Rei at her desk, the faint smell of cigarette smoke lead him to where Rei was sitting on a crate behind the med tent. He walked with heavy feet to give her warning of his presence "Hey. Are you doing better now? He fell asleep, I looked back in after checking for you at your desk and he was already out." He sat down on the crate next to her placing his hand gently on her knee in a friendly comforting manner.

Pulling the sweet nicotine into her lungs she looked off into the distance, not meeting her friend's eyes. "That's good. Sleep and ice will be the best thing for him now." Sighing, she took another long drag and dropped the rest of the smoke to the sand. "I'm tired of this, Zou. I'm tired of war and of Kakashi and generally of men, present company excluded. I didn't think I could do this again after last time." Her mind flicked to the almost unnoticeable sobs that had wracked the huge frame of the man as she had put stitches in his ass. "I don't want to have to deal with all this. I shouldn't have to deal with all this. Find one of the medics and tell them that cleaning up after Kakashi is now their responsibility." She said it, knowing that she didn't really mean it because no one would look after the men like she would. It was guilt and obligation for not telling someone about Kakashi that made her do what she did. But her patience was running out.

"How can you keep protecting him like that? What on earth could you possibly owe him?"

"It's not about what I owe him; it's about what's best for the company. His sexual fetishes aside he is a great Captain who is always thinking of what is best for this company. To take that away in a time of war like now would cause unnecessary worry and distress to the men; they will lose faith in this company, in the army and in this war. With no draft it has been hard enough to get soldiers to fight. No one wants their sons and daughters to die like the people they see on the news. We would lose soldiers if Captain Hatake was taken down." Tenzou sighed and scratched the back of his head "after what happened to Rai I wanted to drag Hatake out into the desert and bury him alive so he would suffer as his lungs filled with sand, but then I thought of the men and how they look up to him. He can't be taken down yet Rei." He leaned over with his elbows on his knees, hands folded together in between them.

"Just keep him in line and keep him out of the infirmary. I can't see him right now." She chuckle morosely and pulled out another cigarette. "He's such a fucking hypocrite. He wrote that fucking report about the poor little private and what a bastard his step father was. Then he goes and does something to a sergeant that's so similar. Fuck. What the hell's he playing at? What the fuck is wrong with him Zou?" She leaned into his shoulder and sighed deeply. "I'm twenty four years old, Zou, and I feel like I'm too old for this shit." Sighing she leaned back into his shoulder, a move she would only do with him. She hated men as a whole but Tenzou wasn't really like a man for her, more like an older brother.

"Right now baby I don't think either of them know what they're playing at," Tenzou replied with a sigh. "Rei, I know you can't tell me but the report, its Iruka isn't it?" He shook his head after asking he really didn't need her to answer he knew it was, he had been the one to sent Iruka for the Psych exam. "He's pretty fucked up isn't he?" he unlocked his hands and sat up slowly to avoiding knocking Rei's head off his shoulder "last night I asked him to be my boyfriend, he said yes then we got into a fight and I think he fucked someone else, he came back much later stinking of sex." He rubbed a hand over his face "fuck yesterday was just fucked up."

"Oh, Zou. I can't really tell you anything about that report and you know that, but you should stay away from Private Umino." She cuddled into his shoulder a little more. There was nothing sexual about what had ever passed between them. There just wasn't. There couldn't be. It was just a comfortable friendship where they'd both given as much advice and support to the other as possible. "He's been through a lot, Zou. I'm not saying he's not a good man but you can't go through shit like that and not be changed from it. I don't think that anything good could come of him and I say that with the heaviest of hearts. He deserves some happiness more than anyone. I have to say, I really wish he was washed out. Then he could be somewhere else, away from this fucking cursed camp and all the freaks in it." She shot Tenzou a small grin. "Present company excluded again, of course."

"It's only been four days and he already has me hooked on him, it was like that love at first sight crap you see in the movies. What is with that platoon?" Tenzou question with frustration clear in his voice. "Rai fell for Izumo; I think the kid felt something for Rai though it would probably be better if it really was just a fun fling for Zoomer. Then maybe Rai can let the hurt cut the tie. I've never seen him like that" Tenzou was staring out into nowhere as he spoke. He shook his head and brought himself back to what he was saying "Genma all lusting for Kakashi and he has some twisted want for Genma. Then there's me and Iruka, both attracted to each other in what should be a simple way; but of course it's not. I'm not into fucking around and all that seems to be on his mind is sex. It's almost enough to make me straight" he looked to Rei with a crooked smile and tilted his head, after a second of looking at her he let a pathetic chuckle escape "Or not." he looked back out to the nothing he was staring at before give a playful shove to the small women with his shoulder.

"The prospect of a good man like you being straight is almost enough to make me switch teams." She pushed his shoulder back and chuckled too before falling very serious. "If you really want to be with him you're going to have to be patient. He doesn't know standard rules of engagement for dealing with people like you or I do. I don't know what happened with the two of you and to be honest I don't want to, but you're going to have to decide if he's worth some heartache until you both figure out how this is going to work, how you're going to make this work." She rested her temple in the cook of his neck and brought her hand to the side of his face, her eyes still locked forward. "Honestly I want you to leave him be, but that's because I'm protective of the few men I like. Just be careful, be patient and think before you ever say anything to him. Don't say something rashly and end up hating yourself for it later." She gave him a little squeeze before putting her cigarette out under her tennis shoe. "I've gotta go finish that fucking report. Remember to keep Kakashi away from here or I'll write him up on the spot."

"He'll never switch sides either you know, he may be able to get it up for a chick but he hates women too much to stay on that side of the fence for long. Don't ever doubt that, Rei, or we'll both be nursing a broken heart. I can tell by what happened yesterday morning that things got stirred up between you two again, don't let your feelings blind you to the truth." he got up off the crate "Like you I don't want to see the few people I care about hurt." he started walking away "I'll be back around lunch to see how my Sergeant is doing."

"Not to worry, Lieutenant. Nothing will happen between us." It was barely audible to anyone, and certainly not to Tenzou who was walking away. She smiled and took the cup of coffee that was being carried by the pink haired woman and moved back into the tent, making sure the icepacks were still in place on her new patient before sitting back down at the desk to finish copying the report.

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Both Izumo and Iruka had been quiet during breakfast, Izumo because he was missing Kotetsu and Iruka because he was still shaken about everything that had happened last night. The young medic kept thinking about the way Tenzou had said 'you smell like sex' again and again, unable to push it from his mind. They both stayed quiet, barely speaking at all until they moved back to the barracks and changed into their PT gear. It wasn't until Neji came into the barracks, looking at them with an almost sympathetic pale gaze and started getting changed that Izumo looked around frantically and turned back to Iruka. "Where's Gen?"

Iruka looked around the room too, noticing for the first time that Genma wasn't there. "I...I didn't see him at breakfast." Iruka turned and gently tapped Neji on the shoulder, smiling gently in gratitude for Neji's help last night. "Hey, Pearl, did you see Genma this morning?" He watched a myriad of emotions fly through Neji's pale eyes and the stiff nod in the affirmative, making him nervous that Neji wasn't saying more, though the man was fairly quiet most of the time. "Uh, was he busy with something?"

Neji's lips pursed and his eyes narrowed for a moment as if he was trying to think about how to answer before he simply nodded again. Iruka was frowning now, clearly unsure how to feel about his best friend and mentor being off on some secretive assignment. "C-could you tell me what?"

Neji's posture stiffened and he pulled his t-shirt over his head. "I'm not at liberty to discuss that. If you want to know you'll have to ask the lieutenant." He nodded towards Tenzou and Iruka bit his lip as he stepped back over to Izumo, unsure if he was ready to talk to Tenzou yet.

"He wouldn't say. He said we should ask the lieutenant."

Izumo gave Iruka a funny look, "The lieutenant? Since when have things gotten so formal between you two?" When Iruka didn't respond, just looked sadly at Tenzou's back across the bunk, Izumo decided to leave it be and save Iruka the interrogation for now. "Sir?" He waited for Tenzou to turn, not missing the way the navy eyes lingered on Iruka. "Sir, I was just wondering where Genma was this morning, he wasn't at breakfast."

"Ahh Good morning private Kamizuki," Tenzou said with a kind smile for the young man. "Breakfast? Did you actually eat your breakfast today private? It's very important that you do. If you aren't I'm not going to be angry with you I would just like to know so I can arrange for you to have supplements so you are not feeling fatigued, it is too dangerous for all of us if you are." Tenzou was hoping he could distract the black eyed private from his question but it was obvious it didn't work.

"I promised Kotetsu I would eat every morning, so I will. Now about Genma, do you know where he is?" Izumo said politely but bluntly.

"Yes I know where he is Izumo he is my soldier I wouldn't be a very good lieutenant if I just let my men disappear," Tenzou said with a little more bite then he meant. He sighed and placed his hand on Izumo's shoulder feeling bad for snapping at him. "Genma was feeling under the weather this morning so he's in the infirmary getting his strength back." Tenzou looked up past Izumo to Iruka whose big brown eyes stared at him begging for more information on their friend and Sergeant. "He's in good hands Izumo," Tenzou said looking back to the worried private, "it's not really my place to be talking about his medical condition with anyone other than the captain, so if you want to know how he is you should go and try and see him after training before lunch. I really can't tell you more."

Izumo nodded, but like Iruka was frowning at how tight lipped everyone was being. He turned back to Iruka but saw that his friend's big brown eyes were still locked on Tenzou over the mattress, laced with sadness as he stared at their superior with remorse. 'Okay, something definitely happened there. I hope Genma gets better soon, he's the best at figuring what's going on in Iruka's head.' Izumo gently laid a hand on Iruka's shoulder, snapping him out of his trance. "We should get going, Ru. Thanks for letting us know what was up with Genma. We'll see you at the training field, sir." Izumo pulled a downtrodden Iruka out the door, the sad brown eyes only leaving Tenzou when Izumo forcibly turned Iruka's body away.

Tenzou's heart was aching in his chest he wanted so badly to hug Iruka and tell he was sorry about last night and how he reacted and to tell him about what happened with Genma and hold his hand as he went to see his friend. He sighed and sat heavily on Iruka's mattress. 'What am I going to do?' he questioned his subconscious, hoping that it would give some answer on how to deal with his boyfriend. It hasn't even been twenty four hours and he'd messed up so bad Iruka wouldn't even talk to him and only looked at him with sorrow filled eyes. This wasn't working well and he knew there wasn't really going to be any time for them to talk till much later in the day if he could even find it then. He sighed again as he got up and gathered his gear for morning training, trying to set his worries aside so he could give his men his all.

Iruka and Izumo both fell hard into the physical training, first the jumping jacks and the sprints over the dunes, the activity keeping them from thinking too much. Izumo had tried to ask Iruka what was wrong but there hadn't been time before everyone else had started to arrive. With their smaller group, Tenzou seemed to be even harder on them, watching their every move for a mistake to get them to improve on, pushing them harder and faster with every step. Maybe it was because they were near the front of the pack, behind Neji and Asuma, or maybe it was this new discomfort between Iruka and Tenzou, but their leader didn't have a whole lot to say about their performances.

Over all the platoon was doing very well, he was already missing Hayate and Kotetsu both men very strong hard workers. Hayate brought leadership in his own quiet way urging the men on and to do better and Kotetsu with his bright smile and sly jokes always kept the moral up. Moral was definitely down today with four of their platoon away and their lead Sergeant missing and not to mention the uncomfortable silence between himself and Iruka that seemed to be poisoning the rest of the group. With all that they were still doing very well. He was always surprised to see how well Asuma did with this type of training with the amount the man smoked but he always seemed to never let it show if he was out of breath. Neji was a strong soldier though he is thin and fair of appearance he was strong and fast and did everything perfect with what seemed to be no effort. He wished he could smile and clap Iruka and Izumo on the back for the impressive effort they put forth today. They both showed no sign of their meek shy personalities in the training field which was impressive he had seen many a shy man disappear from the army just not able to overcome that on the field. He was very proud at fellow gentle men doing their best to show they can fight and protect people without being a bad ass dick about it.

"Sergeant," he called out and waved Asuma over.

When the burly man arrived he clapped him on the shoulder with an apologetic smile. "You are doing great out there and I'm very proud of our men's performance but I really need to take care of a few things. I trust you can take over from here, keep them going strong and hard."

Asuma cleared some snot from the back of his throat, smirking when he spit it out and Tenzou made a face. "No problem, sir. Just the usual PT drills or do you want me to spice it up?" When Tenzou shrugged and turned away, Asuma grinned, loving that he got to be the hard ass in charge for a bit. "Alright, on your bellies. Under fire crawls, on the double!"

Tenzou turned to watch the men crawl through the searing hot sand for a second before heading back into camp, wondering if he should tell Kakashi about Genma being in the infirmary or not. Most likely Kakashi wouldn't care, Genma was just his plaything after all, but if the man did go to the med tent, Rei might, or most likely would, lose it and write the whole damn incident up. Sighing he headed into the small tent beside the HQ, smiling weakly as he could just make out the top of Miss E's head over the stacks of paper on her desk. "Wow, things really do pile up when you take a couple of days off, don't they?"

"That lazy little shit didn't do a damn thing while I was gone. He got all those new men and didn't file any of their information. He was probably too busy playing with his cock to grab a pen," she hissed from behind the mountains of paper. "He's grumpier then a skunk in a trap today. He's been bitching all morning about his damned eye hurting I've checked it four times and cleaned it twice for him and gave him shit for wearing that damned eye patch again when he should still be wearing the bandages prescribed to him. We are in the fucking desert he has to protect it from the fucking sand. I have no idea way that man thinks an eye transplant should just heal over night but he just can't get over how long it's taking and it's making him really pissy." She gave a long heavy sigh and stood up so she could see Tenzou. "Well now that I got that off my chest I feel much better you came at just the right time Daiki," she said in a much nicer voice then continued in the sugar sweet voice she used on most occasions, the rough cruel voice was usually saved for Kakashi, "so what can I do for you today my dear?" she walked around her desk and hoped up to sit on the only clear corner crossing her legs in her little mini skirt giving a glimpse of her bright red lace undies to Tenzou if he was looking, it all being fun and games to her.

Tenzou had to laugh at how the two closest female friends he had, at least in the camp, were so alike and yet in so many ways different. Rei would have smacked him around if she'd seen him trying to sneak a peek, where Wren seemed to encourage it. "Well it's actually Kakashi's cock that brings me here, believe it or not. Like you said, he has been busy with his cock and he's gotten himself into a spot of trouble I think."

Wren nodded knowingly, "Namiashi again?"

"Actually no, he's found himself a new toy in the form of my new sergeant; the same sergeant who I had to take to the infirmary this morning because Kakashi went absolutely psycho on him. Makes what he did to Raidou look like a sibling wrestling match that got out of control. I'm actually here asking if you can keep him sufficiently busy today. Rei is threatening to report him this time. Part of me can't blame her; my man is in rough shape. Still we both know what will happen if she does and I'm assuming you don't want your boss dishonourably discharge. He just needs to stay away from the med tent at all costs."

"So the bitch nurse is still looking for away to get rid of Kashi eh? You would think she would get over what happened to Raidou by now I mean the man kept coming back for more it couldn't have been that bad," Wren rolled her eyes and looked back to her desks trying to think of a way to keep Kakashi busy. "Well there is no way I'm going to keep him busy in here he hates being locked up inside. If you help me set up a table and sun screen then I'll move him there and make him do paper work all day the little shit needs to get this stuff checked and filed so we can get it out of here next week when Raidou does the next supply run. He bloody well knows why it has to be filed, should the war head our way we can't let this type of information fall into the wrong hands. Ahh," she growled. "Listen to me still bitching about paper work when you have an injured man and we have a captain in a load of shit." She stood up and started to sort out some of the papers for Kakashi to work through. "So was this a playdate gone wrong or a full out rape? Like how much trouble are we talking about here Tenzou? Is the kid going to make it or are we really fucked?" Wren's voice had gone very serious as she started into the important questions.

Tenzou shook his head and sighed deeply. "I don't even know what to tell you. It wasn't flat out rape, I know that much and he's going to be fine, he just looks like hell. If anyone takes a close enough look at him though there still could be trouble. Kakashi's serial number is carved in his back." Tenzou nodded when Wren's green eyes went wide and she gasped a little. "I know I'm probably not the one to do it but we've got to get some kind of control on him. He went way too far this time. Genma is a strong soldier and doesn't mind the rough play but this was too much. If Kakashi could keep it check then this could work out well for both of them but if he doesn't... I can't have my men out from unnecessary injuries all the time; especially the kind that are going to freak out my other soldiers." Tenzou reached out and took a stack of papers that Wren had gestured for him to hold. "Oh, and take it easy on Rei. Sure, she doesn't like the captain but she's a princess to all the other men... you know, in her own rough, bitchy, man hating way. She does take good care of them and whether she likes him or not, she's covered for Kakashi more times than most people would. Cleaned up more than a few of the messes he's left with the men of the company." He grunted a little as Wren shoved a box into his arms.

"She's a self righteous bitch who thinks she can push you men around cause she's fooling herself into believing that she doesn't need your cocks, but knows that she does and it puts her panties in a bunch," Wren growled with a roll of her eyes, she couldn't stand that dyke nurse thinking she is so great cause she doesn't need cock when really what she needs is a nice big cock ramming into to her and maybe it might dislodge that stick in her ass. "Well 'Zou you know the only one in camp who could get control over the Captain is Namiashi but he'll never do it because he's too damned loyal. So loyal he doesn't see that it's hurting the camp. If he would stand up to Kakashi and give him a good scare then he might just calm down a bit. You know we really need to get that boy promoted to captain then he would have the balls to stand up to Kakashi cause his rank would tell him he's on equal ground." Wren turned back to look at Tenzou with a raised brow. "Well what do you think? You are the closest thing Namiashi has to a friend do you think you can get him to take Kakashi down a couple notches?"

Tenzou moved beside her to a spot outside where they set the boxes down and followed her back inside. "I can try but I doubt it will work. Something would have to change big time in Rai's thinking for him to believe he can stand up to Kakashi. Which we all know he could, he could crush the man if he wanted to but that's just not likely to happen. Kakashi is such an alpha dog where as Raidou is... well he thinks he's just a small extension of the captain's power, like a gun or a trench knife. That man is in such a fucked up headspace that I don't even think he knows he's a person." Tenzou picked up a table that Wren had stashed in the corner and a chair and followed her outside again, smirking internally about what she'd said about Rei. She wasn't far off the mark. Like Raidou with women, something had scared Rei off men. She'd danced around the topic a few times enough that Tenzou had a pretty good idea about what it was but never dared say anything about it. Plus with the way that she acted to Raidou... well it was obvious that she hadn't crossed the gay line all the way. "So, do you think this will work? Should I tell Kakashi that he put Genma in the infirmary or will he just head right there?"

"I think it best to avoid the subject with him for as long as we can. You know how he got when he put Raidou in the hospital. If he likes this new toy at all he'll be screaming and yelling with Rei making a big scene we don't want." Wren looked around that the table and files then back to Tenzou. "Alright babe, help me with the sun shade then off you go I'll do my best to keep Kakashi busy, you go take care of your men." They walked together to the supply shed, both thinking about what needed to be done around here and all the things this topic had stirred up. They grabbed a sun shade, which is basically a tent without walls, and set it quickly before Wren went to gather Kakashi and Tenzou when back to his men, both a little on edge as they thought about what was at stake if they failed.

*****************************************************************************

No sooner had Asuma let them go for lunch then Iruka was heading straight for the infirmary to see Genma, Izumo hot on his heels. He'd been so worried all morning but had just poured all that energy into their drills, the full weight of his anxiety and exhaustion coming through as he jogged to the med tent. He needed to see Genma, needed his help. He'd screwed things up so badly with Tenzou and the thought of Genma being out of commission; unable to help him was terrifying. He hadn't even bothered to say anything to Izumo when they were excussed for lunch he had just raced off, he had caught a glimpse of Tenzou walking toward the platoon as he was leaving and it only made him move faster.
Finally he burst into the infirmary, doubled over trying to catch his breath. The nurse he recognized from the paintball field the other day was leaning through a privacy curtain and speaking softly to a patient. Another nurse with long blonde hair stopped to ask them what they wanted.

"Uh, could we...see...Sergeant Genma Shiranui please?"

Hearing his name, Genma's eyes went wide and he gave his head a small shake, Rei quickly closing the curtain and moving over to them, her eyes narrowed as she took in the pair. Two men, each recognizable as the men who were playing with her two closest male's hearts, not that she'd ever admit that Raidou was close to her, even though as practically an enemy she was one of the closest things he had to a friend. "I've got this, Ino, thanks," she said before the blonde started looking for Genma in the charts. That might create questions, seeing as how he wasn't on the roster. Her eyes were suspicious but kind to Iruka, moving over his form a little, as if wondering if his smaller body could really have taken all that abuse, as a kid no less. But her gaze to Izumo was down right cold, though it still carried her professional caring edge.

Izumo started to sweat upon seeing the nurse who had walked in on him and Raidou two days ago, she had made it pretty obvious yesterday morning at the start of the paint ball game that she didn't think much of him, but they had to see Genma. "Umm we were told by our lieutenant that Sergeant Shiranui was here and that we could come see him now. We... we are his friends," Izumo's voice squeaked and his cheeks burned red, he was so embarrassed to be speaking to this woman who hated him so much, he was not used to being hated. As the woman's gaze became harder Izumo became very nervous and reached out to take Iruka's hand. He felt like a child with that hard gaze on him needing the comfort of his sibling to make the punishment bearable.

Rei crossed her arms in front of her chest, grinding her teeth a little to try to get herself calmed down. "I'm sorry, Private Kamizuki and Private Umino. Genma is sleeping right now and I don't want to wake him. He should be in better shape later but he needs his rest right now." When Iruka looked like he was about to cry, Rei's very frosty disposition relaxed a little. "He's fine, it's just... a minor injury. He should be back with you all tomorrow. Try not to worry. You can come back later to see if he's awake then if you like." She tried to sound encouraging while making it clear at the same time that they wouldn't be seeing Genma now. She knew that his injuries looked a lot worse than they were and would no doubt scare the poor traumatized medic half to death.

Iruka's lip trembled and he squeezed Izumo's hand. "I...I really need to talk to him." he whispered, making Genma frown from behind the curtain. He realized that he hadn't even talked to Iruka after Tenzou had sent him off to go masturbate last night and he really wanted to call Iruka over to him. Iruka just couldn't see him like this though. "I thought he was sick, not hurt. Is he okay? How did he get hurt?"

"He's fine. Trying coming back in a little while and maybe he'll be awake then," Rei said gently, trying to usher them to the door and wondering if she could cover Genma's bruises with make up enough that he wouldn't look so horrible. He was fully coved with the gown and the sheets so it was really only his face that she would have to cover. "Try at dinner time; you might have more luck then." She wanted to kill Tenzou for half lying to the men and getting her caught in it. Sick would have been a much better excuse than what she'd come up with.

Izumo gave a shuddering breath and pulled on Iruka's hand. "Come on kiddo we'll have to try back later. Obviously Genma can't see us now," he said in a quiet voice. He really wanted to see his friend but he also wanted to get the fuck away from this women. He had to jerk hard on Iruka's arm to get him to move he really didn't want to leave with out seeing Genma. "Come on Iruka you can talk to me about it if it will help. I know I'm not as close to you as Genma is but I might be able to help." He wrapped his arm around Iruka's back resting his hand on his far hip as they walked from the tent heads hanging low.

'Izumo,' Raidou's mind gasped as he saw the beautiful young man walk toward him as he and Iruka exited the medical tent and Raidou was heading to enter to get his bandages changed. What should he do they hadn't even noticed him yet? He knew Iruka hated him now and Izumo... well he didn't know how Izumo felt toward him but he didn't think it could be good with all that went on yesterday. He was going to have to work with these men so he might as well be professional about it and show them that it wasn't going to be the silent treatment between them. For the sake of the camp they would just have to swallow hard and move on to get through the day, just like he did so often with Kakashi. "Good morning Private Umino, Private Kamizuki," he said in his normal gruff tone. He succeeded to keep emotion out of his voice but as Izumo's black eyes looked up to him in surprise then fear his heart tore open and he couldn't help but look down in shame. then it struck him why were they at the med tent and why did they both look as though something very bad had happened, was Izumo hurt or Iruka, had something happened to them. His stomach tied in knots thinking that Izumo could have been hurt, a burning rage started in his heart wanting to break out and destroy what ever may have upset his lov... the young private. "Are you both all right? Did something happen?" He forced his eyes up to meet them and it made him want to be sick at the disdain he saw in Iruka's eyes and he had to turn his eyes away again when he saw himself reflected in Izumo's glassy black gaze.

Izumo hadn't seen Raidou since last night when the man had walked right past him, naked as the day he was born. He wanted to talk with Raidou, try to make him understand but he could see that Iruka needed him right now. "Good morning, sir. H-how are you feeling today? We're both alright. Genma got hurt last night; we were just hoping to see him." He bit his lower lip, wishing he could say more but when he glanced at Iruka he could see the man's big eyes brimming with tears. Letting go of Iruka's hand, he gently rubbed the man's back, his other hand reaching out to rest on Raidou's arm. "Could we talk later, sir? Please?" He watched Raidou's eyes move down to where his left hand was resting oh his arm, his makeshift wedding ring on his finger. He knew that he'd promised Kotetsu he'd stay away from Raidou but he wasn't afraid. Raidou wouldn't hurt him and he needed to make the man understand, even just a little bit. "Please?" He asked again, practically begging now.

So many emotions ripped through Raidou's heart as Izumo's small hand touched his arm, want, need, fear, tenderness and rage. Rage was the only feeling he was familiar with, the only one he knew how to except, but one he didn't want to unleash near the handsome private that had changed so much in side him, that had opened him up to feeling all those other emotions he didn't know what to do with. He pulled his hand away slowly not wanting to seem threatening. "I don't think that would be a good idea Izu... Private Kamizuki." There was so much more he wanted to say to the man but he couldn't. He couldn't tell him that his heart hurt too much to even stand before him as he was now, that he didn't think he would survive Izumo explaining what he already knew, that Kotetsu was his choice his true love and Raidou could never be that for him. He couldn't take those dark eyes pleading with him begging him to let him in so he could hurt him more, he squeezed his eyes shut and turned his head away like the coward the small man made him. He had to swallow hard twice to get his voice to work. "I'm sorry about your friend I hope he'll be alright. Have a good day," his voice didn't even sound like his it sounded like the child that had stepped onto the dock of the main land so many years ago, lost and alone. He shook his head and stepped aside so the two men had a clear path to leave by.

Izumo swallowed thickly, hating the way that Raidou had stepped away from him. He almost wished Raidou had gotten angry, he did deserve that, but he could see the man's eyes that there were still a lot of feelings for him there. Still, Raidou had made it clear, yet again, that he wasn't ready to talk. Now wasn't the time anyway. Tears had started to roll down Iruka's cheeks and he needed to get them away from the crowd. Izumo shot Raidou a last remorseful look before nodding sadly and leading Iruka around the corner so they could talk. As he got Iruka settled down on a crate, he brushed the tears off the man's face. "What's going on, Kiddo? Is it Gen or did something happen with Tenzou? Did he hurt you?" Izumo asked, incredulously, wrapping his arm around Iruka as the man totally broke down, sobbing quietly to keep from drawing too much attention.

"I ruined everything!" Iruka sobbed, burying his face in Izumo's narrow shoulder, which offered so much comfort, but not as much comfort as Genma's broader frame. "I...I had a chance to have a real boyfriend and I ruined it. Oh god, Zoomer, I'm so stupid. I shouldn't even be allowed to be around people like this. I should have just stayed locked up at home for the rest of my life. I...I made Tenzou so angry yesterday and then..." Iruka clung to Izumo as he thought about how scared he'd been with Kakashi, his body shaking he was so upset. "I...screwed up so bad. I don't think he'll ever forgive me. And…and I really like him. I thought finally I..." Iruka whimpered as Izumo shushed him. "I didn't mean to make him mad like that and now he hates me!"

"Iruka, ohhh kiddo," Izumo tried to sooth, "You are a good person Iruka you do deserve to have the best, I wish you wouldn't put yourself down like that, we all make mistakes. Believe me I have made a lot of them in the last few days. I'm sure Tenzou doesn't hate you; if he cares at all he'll understand that mistakes happen. Couldn't you see the way he was looking at you today? It was a hurt look but one of longing, longing to reach out to you. Tell me what happened, Ruka maybe I can help you sort this out. Did Tenzou ask you to be his boyfriend, and why do you think you ruined it? What happened last night kiddo?" Izumo was very concerned, Iruka was normally so in control of his emotions but it seemed since they came to this cursed camp everyone was losing it. Izumo rubbed his hands up and down Iruka's back holding him tight hoping to give the man some form of comfort.

'Mistake,' Raidou's heart tightened as he laid back on the exam table waiting for Rei to change his wraps, unable to not hear the conversation going on just on the other side of the cloth wall. Izumo had been talking about him when he had said he had made mistakes over the last few days. He could feel it right to his rotten black core that he was the young private's mistakes. He wanted to curl up on his side and cry like he had when he was a small child on his uncles fishing boat late at night when he was left all alone. He was always so alone with no one to love him to show him kindness, his uncle and grandfather only putting up with him like he was a small worker and not a family member. He watched the other children with their families and how they were hugged and touched and he couldn't understand what he had done wrong that no one would look at him with a kind eye. So at night he would curl on his side wrapping his arms around himself pretending that it was someone who cared and he would cry himself to sleep. He felt like that child once again, wishing that someone would just care about him. He had thought that Izumo would be that person, that finally there would be someone to love him that he could love back but of course that was not the way it was just other cruel trick of the fates laughing and mocking the cursed child.

Genma was listening too, his bed right beside the one that Raidou was on, though neither of them knew that. Hearing Iruka so upset made him want to hold his young friend, to be the one to protect and comfort him like he had for the past two years. Part of him really liked being Iruka's quasi father figure; it made him feel this bizarre unconditional love that usually only exists in parental relationships and felt that he had the same unconditional love returned. He almost felt a little jealous that Izumo was out there holding Iruka and not him. Just another aspect of their very weird relationship that was too complicated to try to explain.

"Yeah, Tenzou asked me to be his boyfriend. I was so happy," Iruka sniffled, his bruising grip on his friend loosening as he started to calm down a little after the initial outpouring of emotion. "We were dancing and...and then he asked me. And...and then..." Iruka let out another big sob, "God, I'm so stupid. I-I asked him ab-bout sex and he got so mad. I wasn't trying to ask him to have sex I just...I didn't know how long you're supposed to wait in a relationship before you do. I'm so stupid, I should have just asked you or Gen. He got so mad and he wouldn't let me explain. He just walked away and...I didn't know what to do and then..." Iruka sniffled and stuttered, so embarrassed about what he'd done. "Then I saw the captain. He'd been watching us. When...when he did my psych eval the other day we..."

At the mention of the captain, the now three eavesdroppers' eyes went wide. Rei had been very gently changing Raidou's bandages, listening to the conversation through the tent to avoid the stifling silence between them. Her sad eyes turned diamond hard at the mention of Kakashi and him fucking with the poor medic's head. During a psych eval no less. She gently touched Raidou's abs as she got up and moved to Genma's bed when she heard his ice packs hitting the floor and yanked back the curtain, revealing Genma's battered face to Raidou. "Lay back down or I swear I will strap you down!!!" She hissed, her green eyes looking almost maniacal making Genma get the feeling that this was not the time to try her patience. He glanced to the bed beside him, his eyes locking with Raidou's as Rei moved back to his bed but left the curtain a little bit open, hoping to give Raidou a glimpse of just how nuts their commander had gotten.

Raidou's body tensed when Rei moved away and opened the curtain, he was furious that she would invade his privacy like that. When he turned to snap at her he saw what was beyond the curtain. As he stared at Genma's battered face he saw himself reflected in the man. It hadn't even been a year since Kakashi had last put him in here with a similar appearance. Raidou shook his head and looked back to the ceiling to continue listening to the conversation out side wanting to know what the captain had done to the meek heart broken man.

"Oh Iruka," Izumo whimpered stroking his fingers over his friend's tied back hair. He didn't understand why Tenzou had been so mad at Iruka over asking about sex there had to be more to that then he had been told so far, but to him it sounded like they had both made mistakes and Tenzou probably wanted to apologize to Iruka as much as his friend wanted to. More curious was what the captain and Iruka's psych eval had to do with last night, but it seemed his friend was stuck on his words lost in his thoughts. "Iruka what does your psych eval have to do with last night, hun? What happened with the captain?" Izumo gently encouraged.

Iruka's lips trembled and he turned his embarrassed eyes to Izumo. "We...did things," he said in his innocent, child like way. "I...I was just so upset about what had happened and then...it felt really good." He buried his face in his hands, shaking his head in mortification. "But I-I didn't want him. I mean, he didn't force me but I wanted my first time to be with Tenz... someone who cared about me. But I followed Kakashi back to his tent anyway, except this time he wanted everything. I...I thought maybe it would help at first, make it so I wouldn't be wondering all the time about sex and maybe then Tenzou and I could try to be boyfriends again. But when he started...I just couldn't do it and I freaked out. So he sent me away too and then...when I went back to the barracks..." Iruka couldn't even finish. Those words were so seared into his brain that he could hear Tenzou's disappointed voice as if it had been spoken a thousand times.

Raidou's whole body vibrated with anger. He wanted to tear Kakashi's cock from his body he was so mad that their captain had taken advantage of a man like Iruka and during his psych eval no less. To abuse the trust of a soldier like that. he closed his eyes feeling sick to his stomach isn't that exactly what he had done to Izumo, was he now truly just an extension of Kakashi's madness. There was something more in what Iruka had said that stirred something other then anger something that brought about bitter jealousy. Kakashi had stopped. He hadn't raped the young man he hadn't forced him he had stopped and set him free. A kindness he had never received from the sliver haired bastard. He laid there with a torrent of emotions ripping through him, rage over what Kakashi had done to two of their new and most promising soldiers and for how the man had warped him into the same type of monster, guilt over what he had done to Izumo and how much he had become that monster, envy for the kindness Kakashi had show Iruka in not raping him, worry over his friend -Tenzou was a good man and had good morals keeping him strong but would he weaken in the face of Iruka's apparent needs- and finally confusion over feeling so damned much this last week. He would normally have laid there and been able to drown out the voices not caring what was said because no matter what it wasn't his concern the Captain would tell him if it was. He was so occupied by this that he didn't even noticing that Rei had started to stroke fingers through his hair and had no idea that when her fingers gently touched his face it was to wipe away a tear that rolled slowly down his cheek.

Izumo was at a lost for what to say he couldn't believe this had happened; Iruka was messing around sexually with the captain and... and... He couldn't even process all of what he had been told and still he felt he needed to know more. "Iruka what happened? What happened with Tenzou? Why wont you say it please Iruka tell me? And what happened with the Captain? what did he do to you? how far did you go with him?" Izumo felt frantic inside, he had been out getting engaged to Kotetsu while Iruka was struggling with this.

His voice was so shaky when Iruka started talking that it was hard to understand him. "He...w-was in-in-inside me. It j-just d-didn't f-feel r-right, l-like I-I th-thought it w-would. A-and I t-tr-tried to g-get him t-to stop but h-he just kept t-telling me t-to relax." Iruka buried his face in his hands again, trying to hide from how scared he'd been. It hadn't been anything like with his stepfather but it had felt so similar. "Then...when I went back to the barracks T-Tenzou...s-said... that I smelt like sex!" He broke down again, feeling completely hopeless. "He was so disappointed. I thought it would help but it only made everything worse! He'll never forgive me. He has good morals, he won't understand. I don't understand. I'm so stupid and now I've hurt him so much."

Genma listened in horror as Iruka laid out exactly what had happened, his blood boiling as he thought about Kakashi touching Iruka, violating him like that. 'But of course, why would I be good enough when you could have the perfect, virginal sweetheart like Iruka.' Genma laid a hand over his face, embarrassed at how stupid he'd been thinking that he could change Kakashi. Now poor, pathetic little Iruka was a mess and so was he. All because he couldn't see that Kakashi didn't really give a shit about anyone. He didn't mean to be so angry, especially at Iruka but he just couldn't help it. It pissed him off that even though Iruka had all his interest in Tenzou, he'd still managed to worm his way into Kakashi's slightly softer side.

"Oh Iruka I'm so sorry," Izumo whimpered as he hugged his friend tight. "I'm sorry I didn't warn you. Raidou told me to stay away from the captain he almost sounded scared of what the man might do to me. I wasn't sure what he meant or if he was even sure what he was saying cause he was drugged at the time. I should have passed the warning on to you as well, if... if I had them maybe... oh I'm so sorry Iruka." Izumo pressed his face into Iruka's neck sharing in his pain. "This camp is cursed I wish we had never agreed to come here. Why would Genma want to bring us here? First me being trapped and molested by Raidou and now you with the captain. I just want to go home Iruka I want too go back to the way it used to be after basic when we where all together trying to decide where to go, I wish we could go back and pick a different way."

Raidou rolled onto his side away from Genma and Rei not wanting them to see him not wanting to see the hate in their eyes as they hear that Raidou was just as bad as Kakashi, that he was no better. Then he had always said he was just an extension of his Captain a weapon in the man's hand. His wounds hurt as he tightened pulling his legs up to his chest he truly felt like the hated child he could never get away from.

Rei was so angry, she was supposed to hate Raidou right now but she couldn't help the fact that she didn't want him to hurt like this. The only person she wanted hurt right now was Kakashi. She sat down on the edge of Raidou's bed, gently stroking his back and hair, trying to offer him whatever comfort she could before Raidou sent her away again. She knew what he was thinking, and maybe in some ways it wasn't far from the truth but Raidou wasn't nearly as far gone as Kakashi, not yet anyway.

Iruka looked at Izumo in shock, his own pain forgotten for the moment, lost in his surprise at what Izumo had said. "He...m-molested you? I...I don't understand. I thought you l-liked him!" Iruka stuttered, worried that he'd have to be terrified of Raidou too. He just couldn't take much more of this. He agreed with Izumo, he wanted to be home so badly. Well, not home. Basic was the closest thing to a real home he'd had in a long time. He just wished they'd never come here.

Guilt consuming him, Genma watched the brunette nurse try to comfort Raidou. He was so angry that Raidou had forced himself on Izumo but more angry at himself for putting his friends in this situation in the first place. He'd put them in so much havoc, both emotionally and physically. He had to be better for them, for all his men. He wasn't going to let something like this happen to another one of his men.

"I do like him. Very much Iruka. Too much," Izumo said with a sigh, "It's all very confusing." He rung his hands together trying to sort out how to tell Iruka what happened and how it had ended with him caring so much about Raidou. "Well after the Field Medic training when I took the shot to the head, Raidou took me back to his tent so I could rest. I already knew he had his eye on me cause during my physical he had the doctor basically finger me for his enjoyment. I guess it was sort of a test to see if I was gay or something I don't really know why he did it, I just passed it off as a twisted game of power. But when I was in his tent I could tell it wasn't just a power trip he wanted something more. He told me to have a shower so I wouldn't get sand in his bed while I rested. He has a shower behind his tent so I had to strip down in front of him and I started to shower. While I was he came out naked and started to wash me, I was so scared he was so much bigger then me and I was afraid of what he would do to me if I tried to stop him. His hands did feel good but that didn't matter I didn't want to be touched by him. Then he started to touch me... well you know, he started to play with my cock and balls it felt so good so different from Kotetsu's hand they were so big. Then he pressed his finger in me and I got scared and wanted him to stop, cause as good as it felt it wasn't Kotetsu. I told him to stop but he wouldn't he kept fingering me and adding more and he was kissing my neck and it all felt so good. Even though I didn't want it to happen it still felt good and I couldn't help but moan and press into his touches. Then I got dizzy and my head was hurting so much and he changed right then he changed into a different person and he held me and was worried about me. He spoke so softly to me and touched me with such gentle and tender caresses as he raised me and brought me to his bed. He massaged my head and neck to get rid of my headache and said such sweet things to things I hadn't heard in so long. He held me while I fell asleep. I dreamt of him. I was resting and being held and I felt too safe and loved and it was so familiar and I looked up and it was Raidou's chest I was leaning into not Kotetsu's. Then when I woke Raidou was there at his desk and came right over so worried and he touched me and kissed me and said such wonderful things and things that shook everything I had thought I was about till that moment. I had wanted him then I wanted to have him inside me making me feel so much, making me feel beautiful. But I told him I was with Kotetsu and he gave me a lot to think about then left. Then that night after all the stuff had happened with Kotetsu breaking up with me and stuff I just didn't know what to do and Raidou found me and he took it all away he took all the pain away and he made love to me. As strange as that sounds seeing we had only known each other for a day and he is this hard as rock lieutenant there is no other way to describe what happened. It was so soft and caring then hard and passionate when I needed it to be. He did everything so perfect and touched me so perfectly, I was lost in him." Izumo was staring at the sand his booted foot was pushing around slowly as he talked his heart was aching. "But he's not Kotetsu and I belong with Kotetsu he is my soul mate."

It hurt, it hurt too much. Izumo was killing him. He wasn't supposed to feel like this he wasn't supposed to feel anything. His heart was ripping into pieces as he listened to the words pouring from the mouth of the man he cared so much about, words that named him a molester and monster and at the same time spoke of caring and love, but when it had all come back to Kotetsu and that Raidou would never have what he needed so badly because Kotetsu was the better man then him, he couldn't take it. He roughly shoved Rei's hands away from him giving a sharp growl when she tried to calm him. His eyes warning her to keep her distance. He wouldn't look to the man in the next bed he couldn't face him knowing that he had seen his pain. As much as he wanted in some part of him to talk to Genma to try and save the man from the monster that had trapped him for so many years he couldn't he didn't know if he would be able to face him again. His bandages were only half done, Rei having been distracted by the conversation and not finished, but he didn't care he couldn't even think of his open weeping burns as he stormed from the med tent back into the burning sun. The blaring light seeming to ignite his pain. He fell to his knees in the sand but quickly forced himself back up. He wouldn't look around to see if anyone had seen him he just had to get away. Get away from those who had seem him suffer, from the blaming voice of Izumo. He stumbled to his tent more then he walked his mind was so full of painful thought that it couldn't spare the commands to make his limbs move right. He had never felt so much in his life and he didn't know how much he could take. He felt so weak. Izumo was David and his words were the stone in his sling.

Iruka gapped at Izumo as the man talked about his sexual experience with Raidou. In a way he was jealous, Raidou really did sound like he'd treated Izumo well after the initial incident. There was a man who was hard to figure out. Noticing how down Izumo looked, Iruka placed a hand on his shoulder. "Ko will be back before you know it. This will seem easier when he's home. It's good to know that Raidou didn't hurt you. Do you...do you love him?" Iruka asked, a little suspicious about how Izumo was acting. It reminded him of how he felt about Tenzou.

Being brushed off, again, Rei sighed and closed Genma's curtain after warning him again to stay put. Now she was angry at Raidou. The emotional mess of a man was too stubborn to accept help from anyone. 'He's the one who fucking raped me, and molested Izumo. Why the hell do I feel bad for him?' She growled internally, rubbing her deeply bruised shoulder and heading back to work, having had enough of the melodrama of the camp for now. This situation was fucked enough without her getting emotionally caught up in it.

"I don't know kiddo I just don't know. How could I love him, it was a couple days? And yet..." his voice trailed off. He rubbed the backs of his hands over his eyes and sniffled a couple of times he was so sick of feeling hurt and weak it wasn't like him, he is a soldier he shouldn't be sitting around crying but it seemed that's all he had done since coming here. "I really don't know what it is I feel for Raidou but I do know that the thought of losing Kotetsu is something I can't live with, he is the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. I love him, I know that." He hugged Iruka tight again before standing up and giving his friend a weak smile. "I don't know if you want my opinion or not after hearing all that but I really think that both you and Tenzou made mistakes last night and are feeling the same things today. If you care about him and you think you want to give dating him a try then just swallow down your fear and pride and go talk to him. If he cares he'll listen and forgive you. It's best to be open and honest with him Iruka. Honesty is always the best choice." Izumo held out his hand to his friend to help him up. "Lets go get some lunch, I promised Kotetsu I would eat all my meals so I better get on that before I run out of time."

"Shit Zoomer," Genma whispered, shaking his head sadly. In a way he was glad that Raidou had left before he'd said that. Right now that was the last thing the man needed, more confusion or any thought that he and Izumo could be together. He needed to know that Kotetsu and Izumo were meant to be if the platoon was going to have any kind of cohesion. And what baffled him more was that Izumo actually thought he could have those kinds of feelings for Raidou. All of this had taxed him out a lot and he started to get drowsy again. So much to process. How was he supposed to pretend like he hadn't heard all of that? How was he supposed to pretend like he still had any respect for Kakashi or that Iruka was like his little brother? After what they'd done... He pushed his anger for Iruka away, trying to focus it on the people who deserved it, like Kakashi and Raidou...or himself. Iruka was just a kid; he had no idea what he'd been doing and he didn't know that Genma was with Kakashi in what ever sick twisted way that was. He slowly drifted off as he tried to find the answers to these questions, too tired to really think clearly anyway.

Raidou laid on his bed staring at the bottle of vodka he had sitting on top of his little table, he wanted to drink it all right now, forget about afternoon training and drink till he was poisoned enough not to care about anything. He would be giving in if he did that. He would be letting something beat him; he wasn't sure what it was that would be beating him. Was it Kakashi or Izumo, would it be the booze or just himself? He didn't know what it was beating him but he wasn't used to losing and he didn't know how to accept it, but the most troubling part was he didn't know where he could get the strength to fight and get back up. His body felt like a thousand pounds like there was nothing he could do to move his limbs. He laid there staring at the bottle of clear liquid as silent tears dripped off his nose and the side of his face soaking into the pillow he rested against.

Tenzou needed to eat somewhere that wasn't in the mess hall today. He thought about heading to his own tent but after seeing how out of sorts Rei was this morning he decided to go see if Raidou would be more forthcoming. Rei had always been very tight lipped when it came to Raidou. Grabbing two meals, he headed out across the camp, gasping in surprise when he stuck his head into Raidou's tent and not only saw the man laying lifelessly on his bed but also crying. He thought for moment about leaving but Wren was right, he was the closest thing that Raidou had to a friend. Setting down the trays on the desk, Tenzou kneeled down beside the bed, his brows furrowed in concern. This was definitely beyond a Rei issue, whatever it was. Raidou would never waste tears on a woman. "Rai? Are you alright? What's going on?" he asked gently, not wanting to sound too demanding and make the man clam up. When Raidou was silent for a minute, Tenzou stood up and poured them both a small drink from the bottle Raidou had been eying. "One won't hurt. Come on. Tell me what's happening."

Raidou's eyes moved slowly to watch Tenzou pour two drinks, he didn't want to move he didn't want to be alive at the moment and if it had of been anyone... anyone at all other then Tenzou he probably would have snapped their neck for walking in on him at that moment. But it was Tenzou and Tenzou has seen him in worse times then this... at least he thought they should be worse times then this but this felt so much worse right now. With Tenzou's subtle encouragement he sat up and took the drink. "Every day I'm becoming more like the man I hate and admire. I don't understand how I can feel both. I don't understand a lot of things right now Tenzou. Last week I wouldn't have cared about any of this… about anything. I would have just moved along my directed course and done my job no matter what was asked or encouraged. Now... now I don't even know what I am... or maybe even who I am..." Raidou just stared at the floor his tears had stopped for the moment but he didn't bother wiping them away. He had for so long only thought of himself as a "what" and never a "who", but now even that had changed, he was looking deeper and he didn't like it. He didn't like what he was learning about himself, about who he had become and what he was missing to make himself something he could live with.

Raidou had Tenzou's rapt attention at this rare showing of emotion from the usually steely man. 'Definitely an Izumo issue,' he surmised, unsure if he should press since Raidou had started or just sit quiet and let the man continue, but once Raidou started staring at his drink like maybe it had an answer or escape he decided he'd better try. He'd never seen Raidou like this, questioning his existence and if the man didn't have any guidance then he could end up becoming the next Kakashi. He was dangerously close to tumbling down that precipice already. "Well, the captain is an easy man to admire and an even easier one to hate. There's no denying that. You just hate parts of him and admire certain other parts. It's sometimes not easy to tell how you feel overall about a person with all that. So what brought all this up?" he asked, knowing full well that it was something that had happened last night and or this morning.

Raidou took a long drink from his glass before sighing and leaning back on his bed. "A lot of things over the last couple of days I guess. Right now it's mostly due to a conversation I couldn't help but over hear. It made me see just now much I have become like him. He forced himself on someone this week, and brutally beat another, all in his manipulating way of making you think you wanted it. I've lost all my fight against him Tenzou he raped me again this week and I didn't even fight him I just dropped my pants and leaned over. I can't fight him and I'm becoming more like him. I forced myself on Izumo, and I..." he didn't know if he should say this, Rei was Tenzou's friend; he could lose the only person he did trust over this. He closed his eyes and shook his head in shame. "I raped Rei last night at the officer's party. Anko brought her as a pet and I was fucking high and drunk and I thought she was Izumo at first and I raped her. I'm sorry Tenzou," he said as his voice faded off.

Tenzou stared at Raidou in shock or more like horror. "Jesus, Rai," he whispered, completely at a loss. The only reason he wasn't pounding Raidou's head into the mattress was that the man had at least had the decency to feel remorse for what he'd done to her. It blew his mind to think that Raidou had gone so far, with both Rei and with Izumo. Luckily for him both seemed to be keeping quiet about what the man had done to them. His stomach twisted with disgust and he didn't know what to say to Raidou now. How could he tell the man it was okay, that it was alright that he'd committed horrendous crimes?

Tipping back his drink and pouring himself another, he looked back at Raidou, trying his best to keep his face neutral. "I wondered what was bothering her this morning." His eyes were hard as he looked at Raidou, trying to make it clear just how upset he was about this but he kept his voice even. "She seems alright though. Now we really need to discuss Kakashi right now. You need to find that rigid backbone you have when you're fighting because someone needs to snap some sense into him before half the camp is coming forward with stories like this." He had to find a way to get through to Raidou so that the man could see exactly what threat Kakashi posed. "What...what if he sets his sights on Izumo next? Kotetsu is gone and Genma is out of commission right now. He and I aren't that close. What's going to happen if Kakashi decides he wants Izumo or Iruka next or one of the other young, smaller men? Who's going to stop him? Me? I might be able to slow him down but we both know there's maybe two people in the camp that are physically capable of stopping him and that would be you or Asuma, and Smokey would never get the captain to listen to him, nor will I. If someone's going to put a stop to all this it's going to have to be you." Tenzou thought about what Raidou had said and his curiosity got the better of him. "I thought he'd been getting all his jollies with Genma. When has he had time for someone else? Who did he force himself on? We may need to do some damage control."

Raidou shook his head, "You already guessed who. You hit it right on the head. You know he would already be dead if he touched Izumo so who else did you say?" He watched as his friends face went paler then the sand around them. "I thought he was entertaining himself just fine with Genma, but the man seems to be stroking the captain the wrong way. He took me again right before the desert run then apparently he manipulated Iruka during his psych eval and again last night after the two of you fought. Kakashi had been watching and picked up the pieces you left. I over heard Iruka and Izumo talking today outside the med tent while I was getting my bandages changed. Iruka said he had hoped Kakashi would be able to take away his want for sex, his curiosity so he could relax with you and try again to be your boyfriend. When Kakashi started to fuck him he didn't want it, he didn't want Kakashi's cock in his ass he only wanted you, he didn't want sex he wanted to make love. He told Kakashi to stop and tried to get away but Kakashi only told him to relax and he kept pushing in. Then something made Kakashi stop and he released Iruka. You are lucky to have someone who only wants you. I think the two of you need to have a long talk Tenzou he is a very confused young man and he's even more confused now." Raidou took a long drink from his glass again this time he made a face at the strong taste he wasn't really used to, he was a beer man but sometimes beer just wasn't enough. "I didn't mean to hurt them. You know I wouldn't hurt her intentionally. She didn't even push me away; she held me and kissed me. I remember the others trying to get me off of her and her telling them to stop and leave us alone. That I needed this and she was giving it to me. But I still took her, I through her to the floor and tore off her underwear and fucked her. They all saw it and they all saw me break down. I cried in her arms while I raped her body. She was still laying on top of me when I woke up an hour later, still kissing me and speaking softly. I don't understand any of this Tenzou. I'm so fucking lost right now. I haven't been lost or confused about what to do since I stepped onto that peer and up to the enlisting table."

Tenzou almost wanted to cover his ears but instead just poured more liquor into both of their cups. 'Iruka...oh baby, I'm so sorry. I didn't know...' He felt absolutely sick thinking about Kakashi fucking with Iruka's mind and even more so at the thought of Kakashi's dirty cock in his boyfriend's ass. Then he thought about what he'd said to Iruka when the younger man had come back to the barracks last night and his eyes closed with self disgust. He'd only made how terrible Iruka was probably already feeling worse, he was sure of it. He took a small sip of his drink and thought about running out of the tent and finding Iruka. He thought about wrapping him up in his arms and begging him to be patient for just a little while, to never go back to Kakashi again...but he and Raidou still had things to deal with.

Listening to Raidou tell him about how he'd raped Rei was disconcerting too, though at the same time it almost felt right, like it had been a long time coming. He only wished the situation had been different, that Raidou had known it was her, that it hadn't been rape, even if Rei hadn't tried to stop him. "You shouldn't be confused when it comes to her. She probably knows you better than you do. You know exactly what that situation is, for both of you; you just don't want to admit it. Now, you'll be okay, if you want to be. You have to decide if you're willing to deal with the pain that being real and whole brings or if you want to repress everything like our illustrious captain and really become a monster. It's the easy way out to be like him, and honestly I think you've got enough humanity left that you won't be able to live with yourself if you do, but that's your choice. What I need to know is if you'll help me put a stop to all this nonsense or not. We're at war and this camp is not his playground. How are we supposed to train elite soldiers if he's running around fucking and raping everything he can?"

"There is nothing I can do against Kakashi, don't you get it Tenzou. I've been his weapon for so long how can I be anything else. Other than killing him I don't know how you expect me to help. What do you really expect a man like me to do Tenzou? Do you want me to rape him, do to him what he does others? Do you want me to become him to stop him?" Raidou's voice hissed in anger. He was falling apart and his friend was more worried about.... he stopped that selfish train of thought with a growl, Tenzou should be worried about what Kakashi was doing wrong more than what was happening with him. "I don't think I'm capable of dealing with Kakashi right now. Izumo has weakened me if I try and stand up to Kakashi now he'll crush me and I'll be in the bed next to Sergeant Shiranui with more then needing my burn bandages changed. There isn't any part of me together enough to face Kakashi. As for that Rei shit, you don't know what the fuck you're talking about. We are not in love with each other; we have nothing but disdain for the other."

Tenzou nodded, expecting as much. He'd seen Raidou's confidence shaken yesterday and he didn't expect that Raidou would really be up for it, but he had hoped. "Okay, I understand, but you need to get over that real quick, we need our first lieutenant. If things don't get better we're going to end up with a Major in the camp and I can pretty much guarantee that won't end well for a lot of people here, including both of you." Tenzou softened a little. He didn't really want Raidou to get in trouble because he did think that Raidou could still be a good man, even if he was as stubborn and thick headed as a mule. "We need you here, Rai, so be careful. Keep your head together. If you'd ever stopped to actually look at the way Rei looks at you, you'd see you're the one who's wrong but..." he held up his hand defensively when Raidou started to argue. "I'm not going to get into that again. Try to eat something before you go back out there. I've gotta go make sure Izumo and Iruka are okay. You should be the one to talk to Izumo and to Rei, but seeing as how I know you're not going to do that I'll make sure she's alright too." Tenzou was a little aggravated that he had to go make sure that people in the camp weren't about to blow a gasket because of all this shit. The whole idea still made him sick, but he blamed Kakashi, not Raidou for the most part. Kakashi had made Raidou what he was and Raidou didn't have the social tools to try to fix all of this. "Never again, right Rai? Please say the words."

"Never again," Raidou said in an absent minded voice as he poured himself a full glass of vodka. "I'll never let myself feel enough about anyone to want them enough to take them. If I'm stone I don't hurt and I don't hurt people. I've never done anything like this till I saw that black eyed private. He ruined me Tenzou, he ruined everything I was. I don't know what to do now I don't know how to be stone again but it's what I need to be to take care of this camp isn't it Tenzou? I don't think I can be both. How can I possibly be both, whenever I start to feel anything I lose control and end up hurting someone or crying or both?"

Tenzou sighed and pulled the bottle from Raidou's hands and put it back up on the shelf. It was only symbolic because if he wanted to he could just take it right back down. "Maybe he ruined you," Tenzou placed his hand on Raidou's head, rubbing his scalp for a second, "Maybe he did, or maybe he made you take that first step towards being something more. It's harder but it's worth it in the end, Raidou. You don't have to be stone to lead. Think about it." He turned and walked out of the tent without saying anything else, leaving Raidou to think about what he'd said. He wished that Raidou could have the balls to get past this and use this to grow, though he really wasn't sure if that was going to happen. For now he had two soldiers and a nurse to track down, unsure of what exactly he was going to say to any of them just yet, especially Iruka.

"How am I suppose to do that when I have nothing to learn from other then a bitch nurse and bloody prancing fairy," Raidou sighed and lay back on his bed staring up at the bottle now on the shelf. 'Did he ruin me or has he made me better?' he asked himself. He glared at the bottle and rolled over to face the wall of his tent. "So what do I do, how do I start? Start small... I should talk to Iruka and apologize about yesterday. If I can do that then maybe I can face Izumo." He shook his head and pulled his knees to his chest like he had as child hugging himself to give himself comfort when there was no one else to give it to him.

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Iruka listened with a small grin on his face as they sat on their own cots and Izumo told him about his surprise engagement to Kotetsu. He giggled and awed as Izumo told him the whole story and showed him his makeshift ring. "I'm so happy for you two. So you're really getting married here in the camp as soon as Spike gets back? Don't you want all your family to be there?"

Izumo chuckled and finally got to pull his hand back. "Well, I think that we're going to have another ceremony when we get home, but we don't want to wait. We almost went to Kakashi to get it done last night, but we'll want you and Gen at the very least to be there too. Maybe even a few others from the platoon if we can get them to settle down enough for it."

Iruka's melodic chuckle died out as he saw Tenzou come into the barracks and look at him in a way that he just couldn't explain. To be honest it scared him, he wasn't sure if he was ready to tell Tenzou how sorry he was for what he'd done but it didn't seem like he was going to have much of a choice. Tenzou was walking determinedly right for them.

"Hey guys," Tenzou said in a strained false calm. "I've sent Asuma to take charge of the afternoon training I was hoping to talk to you both." He looked from Iruka to Izumo and back to Iruka. "Separately if I could. It's nothing you should be worried about you haven't done anything wrong and Genma's fine," he added quickly when both men's faces showed fear and worry. "There has been a lot going on since you have been here and as our platoon leader, and I hope your friend, I would like to talk to you about it." Tenzou looked at the spot next to Iruka on his bed but decided it might make Iruka nervous so he sat down beside Izumo. "I'll let you guys decide who gets to talk with me first."

Izumo looked at Tenzou and then at Iruka, raising his eyebrows encouragingly but Iruka looked like he was about to pass out he was so pale. Still he knew that deep down it would be so much easier for Iruka if he got it over with as opposed to sitting here and panicking about what they were going to talk about. "Uh, Ru? Do you want to go first, Kiddo?"

Iruka looked for a second like he was going to shake his head but instead swallowed thickly and gave a very small nod, still looking a little pleadingly at Izumo, as if begging his friend to save him. But when Tenzou stood and gestured for Iruka to follow him, the tan brunet somehow managed to get up, his posture looking very much like a young teenager who knew they'd really fucked up as he followed his CO out of the tent and into the sand. They didn't say anything the whole time they were walking, adding to Iruka's tension and panic as they approached the officer's tents. When Tenzou held up the flap for Iruka, the younger man gave his crush a pleading look for mercy before bowing his head and stepping inside.

Tenzou was tense, all his muscle were clenched he was so nervous about talking to Iruka he didn't know how to start. When he turned into his tent and saw Iruka standing there with large eyes staring like a startled cat words just started spilling out. "Iruka I'm so sorry about last night. I over reacted, gods I'm so sorry. I should have stayed and listened to you, let you explain what you meant. Whatever it was I shouldn't have acted like that and because I was such a fool you got hurt. It's my fault and I'm so sorry. I'm just so used to being around people who only want sex from each other I was so sure you were different that when it was the first thing you spoke of I was so frustrated and... and I just acted like a fool. I should have treated you with more respect there is no excuse for my actions I was nothing but an ass and I'm so sorry you got hurt because of it." He closed his eyes for a moment to collect himself he hadn't meant to bombard Iruka like this but it was too late. "I'm sorry Iruka I just hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me, but I'll understand if you don't." He gave a frustrated growl and sighed as he moved over to his bed and sat down heavily looking up to the stunned brunet. "This isn't even what I brought you here for; I brought you here to find out if you were okay about what happened with Kakashi, to find out if he hurt you and if there was anything you wanted done about the way he treated you. I'm so sorry I get all skittish around you."

Iruka blinked his big brown eyes, a little startled when two big tears fell from his eyes, completely missing his cheeks and landing on his boots. He quickly turned his back so he wouldn't have to look Tenzou in the eye. 'He knows, he knows about it all. Gods, what do I do?' Braced against the desk for support, his fingers playing idlely with a few of the papers that had been left there, he sniffed but cleared his shaky voice. "I'm...I'm so sorry. I...I thought...but I'm just so stupid. I don't know anything that you can't learn in books or off the discovery channel. I...I wanted to be...but it's better this way. You shouldn't be with someone like me anyway. You're an officer; you should be with someone smart. Not some stupid medic, who's probably going to end up dead by the end of the first tour anyway, I'm...I'm very sorry I hurt you though." Iruka's body language was very closed as he trembled his muscles were pulled so tight, his arm glued to his side for protection from all the unseen foes his mind made up for him.

Tenzou got to his feet and wrapped his arms around Iruka, holding him tighter when Iruka flinched as if to bolt. He rested his cheek against Iruka's shoulder leaning his forehead against the side of Iruka's head. "Don't ever talk to me like that again Iruka. It scares me to my very core to think of you dying. I've waited a long time to meet someone who catches my interest and makes me want to share myself with them and until you there was no one. Right from the start you sparked a flame in me I knew would not easily burn out and the more time I spent with you the brighter and stronger that flame grows. I have seen so many of my friends hurt in so many ways, I maybe a little too over protective of myself now. That caused me to over react last night and that caused you to step into danger and get hurt. I don't blame you for what happened with Kakashi and you owe me no apology. He manipulated you and hurt you and I'm sorry I wasn't aware enough to protect you from him." Tenzou nuzzled his nose against Iruka's tense neck and tightened his arms a little more hoping to break through the man's fear so he can feel what Tenzou was saying with his body. "Iruka there is no one else I want to try to make a relationship with other than you. I know that sound ridiculous considering we have only know each other such a short time but its how I feel. When Raidou told me what he had heard today," Tenzou swallowed hard, thinking of all he had heard. "I wanted to find you right away and hold you to tell you now much I love you so you would never doubt what a special person you are." Tenzou froze and there was nothing but silence in the room. Had he just said that he loved Iruka? He hadn't even known he felt that strongly but if he said it like that then it was true. He closed his eyes and search through the feelings he felt for Iruka and sure enough they could be described in no better way than love.

Iruka had been holding his breath, expecting Tenzou to take it back but by the time his lungs started to burn the older man still hadn't retracted the statement. He let out his lungful of air and pulled in another sharp breath. Leaning back into Tenzou's strong chest, Iruka tucked his nose under his boyfriend's chin, his hand cupping the other side of Tenzou's handsome face. He wanted it so bad, his heart threatening to explode in his chest. Still, after what had happened last night, he was scared, scared for both of them. He didn't want to hurt Tenzou again, and with all he knew about people and relationships he felt like he was destined to fuck up again. "I don't know if I know how to love anymore," Iruka whispered in a shaky voice, his other hand closing over Tenzou's on his chest, his thumb brushing over the sand worn skin. "It's...this is all I've ever wanted, for as long as I want to remember...but... I'm not even sure I know what love is now." It was true, all he knew about romance he learned from movies and bad paperback romance novels when he'd been living alone, barely any connection to the outside world except the librarians and the woman at the office where he was getting his GED through correspondence. This was so much more than he'd ever had since his mother had died or since he'd come to basic. He wanted so badly for Tenzou to pull him down to the bed and just lay on top of him, holding him and protecting him with his body, he wanted a kiss or two, or as many as Tenzou would give him but at the same time, he didn't want to move a muscle. "I'll...I'll hurt you again. I'll do something wrong without understanding. I don't want to hurt you ever again..." Iruka tightened his hands, worried that at any second Tenzou would decide that he was right and this was way more effort than it was worth.

Tenzou turned his head just enough to give a little kiss to Iruka's forehead. "You sounded just like Raidou for a moment, he is a very lost and hurt man as well and he is also my best friend. Iruka a relationship is never easy whether it is a friendship or a romantic coupling. I'm a kind and caring man Iruka I'm a little jaded over sex but you can talk to me about anything. Genma gave me a good blasting last night and pulled my head out of my ass so I'll be able to hear you now Iruka. If you are unsure about something or wish to know about something ask me, I'll do my best to listen and answer. Hurting each other will happen, Iruka. No matter now much we don't want it to it will. In those times Iruka is when we'll have to hold each other the tightest." Tenzou stepped back and taking Iruka's hands turned him around to face him. "Come lay down with me, we can hold each other now," He said in a soft gentle voice as he stepped back toward the bed. "Love is hard to explain Iruka, but you have it and even though Raidou thinks he doesn't he does too. Your friendship with Genma is all about love, it borders on the romantic but hasn't crossed it and of course I'm thankful for that because it means I have a chance with you. I'm not in a rush Iruka well take it slow work on our friendship and it will become clear to you if there is love or not. Of course our friendship will be different then your other friendships a lot more holding and snuggling and kissing." Tenzou keep explaining as he stepped back slowly toward his bed, he so wanted to hold Iruka in his arms without worry of being disturbed.

Iruka watched Tenzou sink to his mattress and hold out a hand to him. He slowly shuffled to the bed and let his hand come to rest in Tenzou's palm, a nervous smile on his face as he climbed onto the bed and into the warmth of Tenzou's body. He rested his head against the muscular chest, squirming a little to get comfortable but even with the long, strong arms around him he didn't like how exposed he felt with his back facing into the room. After a moment when he still couldn't get himself to relax, he rolled onto his back and tugged on Tenzou's uniform to get the man to roll part way on top of him. Tenzou seemed hesitant but eventually relented, rolling his shoulder partly over Iruka's chest. The younger man was practically purring with happiness, the weight of Tenzou's body feeling even better than he could have guessed. Now he really wanted his boyfriend t lay all the way on top of him; he couldn't remember a time when he'd felt so safe an content. He smiled up at Tenzou, happiness sparkling in his eyes as he looked at the Navy eyes above him before Tenzou lowered his head to the pillow they now shared. "This...this is nice," he said lamely, unsure of what else he was supposed to say, a dark flush pushing across his nose.

"Do you feel safe when I'm leaning over you Iruka, is that why you pulled me over you?" Tenzou asked, having figured that was the reason when Iruka settled right after some of his weight was on him. The shy blushed nod from Iruka confirmed it and Tenzou smiled. "That's good Iruka I'm glad I give you comfort," he said running the tip of his nose along Iruka's neck. He wrapped his arm around Iruka tighter pulling himself over him just a bit more. He wanted to stroke Iruka's skin but didn't want to get the young man worked up and confused so he kept it on Iruka's shoulder. "Iruka would you like to talk about sex? You were asking me about it last night and I misunderstood I think. I would like to try that conversation again." Tenzou said gently giving Iruka a squeeze for reassurance.

Iruka's stomach clenched in panic, worried about a repeat of last night. Not to mention that now he was mortified that he'd had two cocks inside of him in his entire life, neither having been a very good experience. The smile fell away from his face and he turned his head away from Tenzou, his brows furrowing as he thought about what he'd done last night. He was so embarrassed and sick with himself when he thought about how he'd just followed Kakashi back to his tent like a horny lap dog. "I...I don't know what to ask," he said softly, unable to push the negative thoughts away. He bit his lip, looking anywhere but at Tenzou, his body squirming and shifting a little under Tenzou's weight as he tried to calm himself down again. His body language really was as easy to read as a book but Iruka certainly didn't know that and struggled to find something to say. Tenzou had said that he wanted to talk about this so he'd have to try. "When...when is it...appropriate...for two people in a relationship...to hav-to make love?" he asked quietly, very careful with his word choices as he spoke.

"Well it is different for every couple really," Tenzou replied right away hoping that his fast reply would show Iruka that his question had been a good one and to stop worrying. The body half under him was still squirming with nerves though. Tenzou rolled right over top of Iruka his torso laying on top of the smaller man's with his legs to either side of Iruka's he held himself up on his elbows along Iruka's side so he could give them room to breathe and look at each other. "I feel that it should be when we feel more comfortable with each other and our relationship. When we feel like this..." he awkwardly pointed between them, "is really something that might last. Right now I'm hoping it last forever that we can work this out between us and make a real relationship happen. If you just start into sex then it confuses the relationship, it makes you feel closer then you really are you spend more time having sex and using it to solve your problems then truly working it out with words and compromise. That's why I think it's so important to wait. When we feel like we are really working well together Iruka like we understand each other I think then we will both feel it's the right time to make love. That is what I want it to be Iruka, I want to make love to you not just fuck or have sex, I want it to be about love." Tenzou leaned down and kissed his boyfriend gently on the lips.

Iruka hummed a little into the kiss, his body relaxing again under Tenzou's weight, though it was still clear that he was no where near as relaxed as he had been before this topic had started. He had so many things he wanted to ask but each question that came to mind made him feel a little more child like. He didn't want to sound like a kid but he couldn't think of any intelligent questions and his blush certainly made it even harder to seem like a man in front of his strong, masculine boyfriend. It was only the way Tenzou's fingers were gently cupping and stroking his cheeks that kept him from turning his face away again and Tenzou could feel him flinch every so often as he longed to look away. Still, his boyfriend's eyes were gentle and encouraging so after a couple of minutes of silence and three more short, chaste kisses, Iruka tried again. "Uh, w-will it always hurt some? Do I have to be on the bottom?" he asked nervously, feeling so stupid for knowing so little.

Tenzou smiled warmly at Iruka he was so happy to hear the young man ask him questions and very good question at that. He leaned in and kissed him deeply stroking his fingers over his face and through his hair. "those are very good questions and they both have the same answer and that would be no," Tenzou gave gentle kiss to Iruka again before continuing, his tone being one of calm there was nothing in his voice to suggest talking down or mocking of Iruka or his questions. "It wont hurt all the time, When we are together sexually I'll work you open slow and it will hurt less because of that and after a little while it probably wont hurt at all. Of course sometimes it will but that happens and it would just because of bad angle or not being relaxed enough." Tenzou kissed Iruka again this time long and slow, he slid his hand down the long haired brunet's arm to his hand bringing it up Tenzou pulled back from their kiss to nuzzle the hand and kiss it before sliding it down his neck to rest on his chest. "You don't have to be bottom, Iruka. I've found through the years that I enjoy both top and bottom positions and I really hope that we can have a relationship that isn't bound to position like that and if that takes time to get to that point, I'm fine with that as well. I just want you to feel comfortable with me."

Iruka nodded, relaxing even more with relief. Everyone just always assumed that he'd be bottoming; he'd never even bothered with the thought that maybe he could be on top, though with his history, that surprised him a little now. It helped to know that Tenzou not only wasn't going to push him but that he was willing to bottom for Iruka if that's what Iruka wanted. None of the other people that he'd dated for a couple of days when he was in basic or the one he'd sort of seen when he was back home, they'd all wanted sex right away and hadn't even asked him if he wanted to top. "Thank you," Iruka whispered, nuzzling Tenzou's cheek. He really did have about a thousand questions but he didn't want to make Tenzou angry with all the stupid ones so he tried to cut down some. "Uh...how often can we do this?" Iruka asked, running his fingers through Tenzou's hair and tickling down his neck. "I really like this," he murmured, his cheeks absolutely glowing.

Tenzou's face split in a bright loving smile, his boyfriend was so sweet, he was bubbling with excitement about getting to knew Iruka better. "I really like this to Iruka. If it was my choice I don't think I would ever stop doing this." He gave a couple of pecks to Iruka's pout beautiful lips relaxing and enjoying their stolen time together. "We are both very busy men, who have a lot of responsibility so it wont be all the time but I think we'll be about to sneak in stolen moments every day at least I hope we can. Most nights we have free time after dinner so we can escape to our own private hide away then. This tent is mine so it's will always be available to us. Of course we are going to want to spend some time with our men it's why I have chosen to stay in the barracks so they feel they can get to know me." He laid down now and rested his head on Iruka's chest sliding to the side a bit so they could be comfortable, his hand stroking Iruka's flank. "I think we'll be able to find time together," he said almost dreamily thinking of them escaping and laying in each others arms and touching and kissing, then someday when they know each other more he could see them making love.

"That sounds nice," Iruka said with broad grin, his fingers continuing to tease and play with the hair on the back of Tenzou's neck, really wanting this to be as memorable and arousing for Tenzou as it was for him. He held on to the man tightly so that he would have less room to run away, still expecting that at any moment, his boyfriend would just take back everything he said and head as fast as he could for the hills. He still had so many questions but he was getting tired of asking them. He didn't want Tenzou to know how uneducated he was and that he'd actually looked sex up in the encyclopaedia. He was such a nerd.

Giving his head a little shake and grinning shyly, Iruka slipped his hand into Tenzou's not minding at all the way it was pushed back against the mattress. He was a little surprised that he was so comfortable like this, but then again he wasn't on his stomach and Tenzou wasn't lying on his back... "Uh...wh-wha...what about... uh... uh." Iruka stammered nervously. "W-what about other...things..." Iruka hoped that Tenzou's would know he was talking about blow jobs or hand jobs, too embarrassed to say either right then.

Tenzou looked up confused at first but Iruka's blushing and avoidance of eye contact gave him a pretty good idea what he was asking about. "You mean blow jobs and stuff?" When Iruka's cheeks flamed bright Tenzou was finding it hard to hold in the adoring awwww. "I'll take that as a yes." he ran his fingers over Iruka's burning cheeks. "Iruka you don't have to be so embarrassed with me. Really any question you have I'll try and answer. In my scolding last night from Genma he let slip that you don't have much experience with sex so I would expect you to have lots of questions. You don't have to ask them right now, when ever you feel comfortable with please ask me. I would much rather you ask me a thousand questions then worry about one unanswered." he kissed Iruka again pressing his lips hard to Iruka's opening his mouth just a bit to brush his tongue against dark pouting lips. He pulled back slowly but right away so Iruka wouldn't fall into the kiss just yet. "So blow jobs and hand jobs things like that..." Tenzou hmmm-ed while thinking about how to explain that one. "Well they mostly come before sex. They are a nice warm up into it. I think for us when we knew each other better and are more comfortable we'll experiment with those. I think it will be good for us to work those things slowly and build up to sex." When he saw that Iruka's face and body was tightening, he hmmm-ed again and thought harder. "If you would feel better with a time line I can guess a rough one but it will really all depend on how we feel with each other and how much time we've had with each other." He stroked his fingers over his boyfriend's cheeks trying to sooth him. "but I think if we are able to spent time together and get to know each other I would guess in a week or so we could move into hand jobs, and a little while after that like again depending on how we feel with that but then blow jobs and anal play. I really can't say how long till sex Iruka and I don't want to put a time on that. It will depend on a lot of stuff but we'll work there together, it won't be just me deciding this we'll talk about it together. If we can't do that then we are not ready for sex. Does that make sense Ruka?"

Iruka nodded, glad for his nearly permanently blue balls that they could start touching each other like that so soon. This was actually a perfect way for him to go about all of this, Tenzou making sure to give him time to adjust to the new sensations. His cock twitched and hardened as he pressed up against Tenzou's groin when he shifted and his body went stiff as a board. 'Did he notice that? Maybe we shouldn't be lying like this,' he thought and gently rolled Tenzou off of him, flipping on his side to hide his embarrassment and self anger. "I-I'm sorry," he whispered, feeling dirty all of a sudden. When Tenzou wrapped his arms around Iruka from behind a shot of panic ripped through the younger man's chest. He almost started to struggle but managed to remain outwardly calm and flipped back so he was resting his head on Tenzou's chest. 'Definitely have a few mental bugs to work out, don't cha? Maybe this was a bad idea all around.' "I'm sorry," he whispered shyly again, completely mortified that he'd gotten hard already. He curled his arms around himself, his last line of defence, seeing as how his whole back was open to attack from anyone who could come in. Still those strong arms held him and he knew that if he had enough time then he would be able to loosen up with his boyfriend.

"Iruka its okay we'll work through it all," Tenzou said gently against Iruka's cheek. "You just tell me what you need to be comfortable and we'll work it out." He held Iruka a bit tighter being careful to move slow checking for him to tense more, when he didn't he started to rub his hands over Iruka's back and shoulders. There was something he wanted to ask Iruka but he was very nervous Iruka was so delicate about this subject he didn't want to make him more so, but if it did work then maybe it would help Iruka a lot with waiting for sex. "Iruka..." Tenzou leaned in and kissed his boyfriends forehead, "do you think you could touch yourself with me here... I mean do you think you would be able to masturbate with me? Maybe it won't feel so wrong if I'm right here telling you its okay." He held tight to Iruka so the man couldn't pull away from him, he didn't want to ruin anything by asking that.

Iruka's body went riding as a board but Tenzou's strong arms and gentle shushing helped calm him down a little. 'How does he know about that??' Iruka's mind screamed and he tried to get better control of himself, letting his muscles relax against Tenzou's. The answer came to him faster than he'd expected and made him both furious and grateful at the same time, 'Gen.' He shifted a little against Tenzou, thinking about giving himself pleasure while lying in the man's arms. His wilted cock started to harden and he traced the pocket on Tenzou's uniform shirt, his eyes following his fingers so he wouldn't have to look at Tenzou in the eye. "I...I don't know. Maybe..." He really wanted to try and he was fully hard in his pants mere seconds later but at the same time he wasn't sure if he could. It always made him get sick and it would be so embarrassing if he ended up getting sick all over Tenzou. He didn't want the man to know he was that damaged. They'd never be able to have a relationship if Tenzou found out just how crazy he was. Iruka was amazed that, knowing what he did, the calm, normal man wanted him.

"Iruka never feel like you have to okay," Tenzou said stroking his fingers down Iruka's arm. "I just want to help you because I care about you. If you try it and it doesn't feel right you can stop, I won't be mad or disappointed or judgemental. Maybe that's something we can work on. When ever you are excited like that we can try it and if it doesn't work for you then we'll stop and just snuggle together till we feel ready to do it to each other." Tenzou rested his forehead to Iruka's sliding down just a bit so they were eye to eye. "It really is alright to touch yourself Iruka, as long as it's in private there is nothing wrong with it. It's very healthy for you." he gave a little smirk and rubbed their noses together. "Besides I wouldn't mind at all seeing a beautiful man like you enjoying such an intimate moment."

Iruka opened his eyes and looked into the navy depths before him and nodded his flush face. He leaned forward and kissed Tenzou, the short chaste kiss turning into long, slow locking of lips making his hardness ache in his pants. Their lips parted simultaneously and their tongues brushed, making Iruka gasp into the kiss at how good it felt. He slowly moved his hand to the front of his pants and flicked open the button, concentrating on what was happening with his mouth and not what his hand was doing. Their tongues brushed again as he slid down his zipper and wiggled to push his pants down his hips. He whimpered with want as one of Tenzou's big hands slid down his back and pushed down on the waist of his pants to help him free himself, the fingers gently stroking the smooth skin of his cheeks and amping up his lust.

"You are so beautiful Iruka. I'm so excited to be your boyfriend and learn about you and become closer to you," Tenzou said what he thought was sweet words that might help to relax this boyfriend. His hand massaged Iruka's ass softly and non invasive he didn't slid his fingers between his cheeks at all, as his other hand that was mostly trapped under him brushed his fingers over Iruka's chest brushing against his nipples just a bit to loosen him up. He sealed their kiss again gently stroking Iruka's mouth with his tongue.

It felt so good to have Tenzou touching him like that and if he didn't respect the man's wishes so much he would have begged Tenzou to just do it for him, but the man had made it very clear that he wanted to wait for that. Iruka's hand slowly gripped himself, his skin crawling the second it did. He forced his mind to think about Tenzou's hands on him and the taste of the man's tongue. His fingers began to slowly move along his shaft and dance over his head in the same manner that Tenzou's fingers moved over his ass, trying to trick his mind into believing that it was really Tenzou that was touching him. He didn't notice how his blush had completely disappeared and how his face was going pale, trying to hard to hold onto to all the pleasurable sensations. "Mmm, Tenzou..." Iruka purred, deepening the kiss and rolling a little onto his back and coaxing Tenzou to lean over him, pushing his ass and chest into the older man's hands, encouraging them to continue. He gripped himself more firmly, trying to ignore the way his ears started to ring with all the blood that was rushing through them or the way his stomach tightened in protest. He slowly moved his hand, squeezing his eyes closed as he felt his body rejecting the self-induced pleasure. 'You can do this. Everyone masturbates, it's not wrong.' Speeding up, he tried to focus on Tenzou but the memories of violent pain kept creeping their way into his head. Suddenly his stomach lurched and he reared back, clapping a hand to his mouth just encase something was going to come up, his eyes flooding with tears of shame. Iruka turned his face away and covered his face as he rolled all the way on his back. "I...I'm sorry. I c-can't." He was so embarrassed and scared that Tenzou would start to see him as he was and not through the rose coloured glasses that he'd been seeing Iruka through.

"Shhh shhh Iruka, It's okay. You did so well. It's okay. If you can't do it that's fine." Tenzou kissed all over Iruka's cheeks and the hand's covering the embarrassed face. "Baby, come on love its okay please don't be worry. We all have demons and ghosts haunting us. Please don't be sorry for it." He relaxed down beside Iruka his arm over his heaving chest. "I'm a man with a lot of experience in pain and scars. I'm not naive enough to think that your outer scars don't come with even more serious inner scars. I'm here Iruka because I care about you and you are scarred and so am I. I'm not the boyfriend to the made up exterior you wish for people to see I'm the boyfriend of the real Iruka with all his ups and downs." Tenzou rubbed his hand over Iruka's belly loving the feel of his lover. "If you want to try it again Iruka some other time maybe it would help if I did it as well. Do you think that might help?"

Iruka tried not to think that even Tenzou could see he was screwed up, he'd said it himself. Still, he'd also said that he still wanted him, even though he was too broken to love. He pulled his hands away from his face a little, peeking over his fingertips at his boyfriend, the kind navy eyes encouraging him, full of concern and affection. With a shuddering breath, he wiped the tears and cold sweat off his face and buried it back in Tenzou's shoulder. "I don't know," he murmured sadly, "I just don't know. I guess I've waited this long I can wait a little longer. I just hope...my past doesn't become a problem in...That regard. I just don't know I've done so little of...this kind of thing." Holding onto Tenzou's body helped calm him down and he breathed in deep the smell of Tenzou's body odour and deodorant and the light tang of the salt on his skin, trying to push the terror induced adrenaline from his veins.

"All we need is time Iruka and that's something I'm very willing to give you. We'll find away together. I promise we will," Tenzou was very confident in the words he was saying to Iruka he truly meant it they would find a way. Even if that way was them not being a couple as boyfriends to help Iruka he would do it. He didn't want it to come to that but he would. He gave a long cleansing sigh and hugged Iruka close kissing his forehead again before relaxing back against the bed. "Okay I think that's enough of the heavy stuff for right now how about we do a little of getting to know each other? Like what kinds of foods do you like and your favourite animal easy stuff. There is so much to learn about each other and not all of it is heavy and dark, love."

When Iruka gave a cute little sigh and snuggled closer his heart started to beat harder and it felt warmer even, it was so comfortable to be with Iruka like this. They stayed in each other's arms and talked about all sorts of nonsense that was just fun to know about each other. From favourite movie to the worst food they had ever tasted. It was peaceful and quiet with soft words and even softer touches. It was about 45 minutes later when Tenzou's eyes opened wide and he turned and looked to Iruka. `Shit I forgot about Izumo he's most likely still sitting in the barracks waiting for me to come back to take to him.' he gave a chuckle at what an embarrassed fool he felt like for getting so wrapped up in Iruka that he had forgotten about his other soldier waiting on him.
Iruka's panicked look from Tenzou sudden startled movements turned to a smile as he realized what had the man worked up and how embarrassed he was over it. "Well I guess you better get back to him before he really starts to worry."

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Raidou had been staring at his wall a long time going over all the advice he had been given the last couple of days from his friends. Tonbo's and Tenzou's words hold great weight with him. They had both suggested that Izumo didn't have to be his end but truly could be the open door to his new beginning, if he would just step through. Change was not going to be easy, but he didn't believe he could go back now. Even through all the pain there was good things that he had felt that he would like to feel again, things that didn't involve his relationship with Izumo but were a result of the feeling's the man had stirred in him. Like this time with Tonbo last night and his drugged moment of intimacy with Hayate yesterday evening. Even though that had turned into pain while it was happening it had felt nice to touch someone like that in a caring gentle manner. Other things had been burning in his mind that normally would never have crossed his thoughts like the strange guilt he felt over his trick on Iruka during the game. He had hurt the man's feelings and he wasn't sure if it was because Tenzou cared so much for Iruka or if it was because he saw too much of himself in the young man that he wanted to make things right between them. He had managed to pull himself together in his time alone in his tent since Tenzou had left him to think and had found a small measure of resolve, it wasn't much but it was more then he had this morning, so he grasped it tight and pulled himself out of bed. He pulled on some clothes and decided to go for a walk around the camp and see how the platoons were making out today.

When Raidou stepped out into the bright sunlight he had to shield his eyes from the blaring rays while he pulled his sunglasses from his pocket, he had been laying in the dark of his tent for to long to just walk out into the desert. As he squinted getting use to the bright light again he heard Tenzou's chatting voice saying goodbye to someone. When he hear the second voice he couldn't believe that it was the very man that had been holding a large part of his conscience the last hour or so. As he blinked into the light he saw Iruka smiling up at Tenzou saying a happy goodbye.

Raidou made his way over to the obviously new couple slowly not wanting to interrupt their good byes. As Tenzou started to walk away Raidou spoke up. "Private Umino," he said in a gruff voice stepping closer. "I was hoping we would be able talk."

Iruka's head snapped from watching Tenzou's back happily as the man walked away to look at Raidou's scarred face, a little shocked but his sudden appearance. Even though the voice seemed gruff, Raidou's face seemed fairly neutral giving Iruka the impression that he wasn't angry, whatever this was about. He tried to remember what Tenzou had told him yesterday about Raidou so he wouldn't get too upset. "Sure, sir. As long as I'm not due back at training. I guess if I'm with you I can't get in too much trouble about it." He chuckled nervously, looking over his shoulder at where Tenzou was looking back at him as he walked away. Biting his lip he turned back to Raidou, hoping the man was in a better mood than yesterday. When Raidou didn't smile or make any sign that he'd heard him, other than turn around to head for his tent, Iruka worried his lip more with his teeth, not sure if he really wanted to have any conversation with the man after how he'd acted yesterday.

He followed Raidou into another officers tent and sat down on the bed when Raidou gestured for him to do so, wishing he was still wrapped up in Tenzou's arms. Being with someone was addictive; he'd have to watch himself. "What...what can I do for you sir?" he asked uncertainly.

Raidou sat on his small chair just like they had the other day when they had their conversation about medical supplies, and looked at Iruka for a long moment. This was hard for him to do because he was only being himself yesterday, it had been a very reasonable deceit to take out an enemy but obviously Iruka hadn't seen the game the same way and didn't know Raidou well enough to know it was all about tactics. "Private Umino I was hoping you would accept my apology for yesterday. To someone who doesn't know me and the way I see the game that would have seemed cruel and insulting. I think you are a very good medic and a very good soldier from what I've seen of you in training and what I've heard from your previous instructors," his voice was steady and on the up side of emotionless.

Iruka gaped at Raidou, clearly not having expected this. His mouth opened and closed silently a couple of time as he tried to wrap his head around a man like Raidou apologizing to him. Honestly it just didn't fit. Still Iruka looked at his face and saw sincerity in the brown depths. Slowly he nodded, still fearing a trick from the volatile officer. "Sure, it's alright. I over reacted anyway. It was just a game." He really did want to patch things up with Raidou, especially since he was close with Tenzou. He gave the man a bit of a warm smile, relieve that this was all that the man wanted to talk about. "I'm sorry about how I...about what I said. I..." Iruka blushed and shook his head, "As cheesy as this sounds, I'd really like it if we could be friends. I...I don't really have that many friends and they pretty much all treat me like I'm a kid. It would be nice to have at least one who doesn't think of me as someone who needs constant protection." He grinned wearily but that quickly turned into shy, pulling of lips upwards. "Besides, Tenzou likes you." His eyes went wide and he began to stutter. "I-I mean Lieutenant Daiki."

"I'm not very good at being friends with people as Tenzou can attest to," he made a point of calling the man by his first name. "But I'm hoping that I'll be able to change that a bit. I'm not really sure now but I'm going to try. It may seem strange and most likely insulting but I see some of myself in you and I'm hoping I might be able to help you to not become like me." Raidou had been managing to keep his voice empty but it was getting harder he really didn't know what he was saying he felt like he was walking into a mined field with a blindfold on and that or course was very frustrating for a man like Raidou. "I over heard you talking to Izumo today. I'm sorry for listening into a private conversation but I was getting my bandages changed on the other side of the tent wall and it was difficult not to hear. I understand what you were saying is something you wouldn't want anyone else to know so I'm sorry for that as well. You need to stay away from him Iruka. He is a dangerous and addicting man who can control and manipulate anyone he wishes. Even if he has buttered words now they will turn bitter and cruel, you must stay away from him. If he starts to think you are his he will... well he'll give you very harsh lessons about what he expects from you. Tenzou is one of the few people in this world who might care about me and he cares very much for you so that mean's you are important and I will try to help keep you safe, but Kakashi is something beyond even me to protect you from." He knew his words were harsh and frightening but he wanted to scare Iruka away from the insane captain.

He was shocked and mortified that Raidou had overheard their conversation but Iruka was slowly starting to put things together. 'Maybe Raidou told Tenzou and not Genma.' It was a bit of a relief that Genma might not have told all his secrets so openly. He thought about how Kakashi had been last night and he could see from the loneliness and warning in Raidou's eyes that he meant what he'd said and that Iruka had been lucky last night that Kakashi had let him go. "I...I understand," Iruka said softly, unsure of what else he should say. The fact that Raidou was trying to help him made him want to help the scarred man too. There was a kind of emptiness to Raidou that was very familiar, like something important was missing from the man. He'd lost a lot of that when he'd found Genma, Izumo and Kotetsu but he was hoping Tenzou could fill the rest of that void. Raidou still hadn't found something to fill that in him, though he'd wanted Izumo to. "Thank you for the advice, sir...Raidou. I appreciate that you care enough to warn me. And I would like to be friends. You can never have enough people who you can count on."

"Thank you Iruka," Raidou's lips twitched at the edges in a barely there smile as he thanked Iruka, it was small but it was real. Seemed as though before Izumo stepped into his life a smile was so rare he didn't even remember what it felt like this was a big step for the lonely lieutenant. "It was nice to see you and Tenzou talking so nicely with each other. You seem to be getting along well. He is a very good man, the best one I've met. I've known him for a lot of years Iruka and I can tell you no one has taken his interest like you have and in so short a time no less." Raidou watched Iruka for a few moments as he blushed and shifted on the bed thinking about what he had been told and about Tenzou in general. He could see how strange it all felt for Iruka to be thought of in such away, so much like himself. "If what I see of myself in you if really there then Tenzou would be a very good man for you as either a friend or more. I was unable to accept the help he was willing to give me, I would be a very different man if I had of." He felt so strange and out of sorts sharing this with Iruka, he was not someone who shared, it felt like his skin was crawling even though truly he hadn't said that much it felt like he was giving Iruka the guided tour.

Iruka nodded a bit solemnly, wishing there was something he could do to help his superior too. He bit his lip, wondering if he should tell the man this or not but it might help him eventually and he had a feeling that this was a side of Raidou that very few people ever got to see, so different from a man who had entrapped Izumo. "Sir-Raidou...there's something...I think you should know. I...it's probably not something you want to hear." He gently reached out and rested his hand on Raidou's wrist, noticing that his slender fingers would probably only just wrap around the man's arm at the smallest point. He looked into the surprised brown orbs, his own eyes narrowed in concern and sympathy. "Kotetsu...asked Izumo to marry him last night. They're going to get married as soon as Kotetsu gets back." He could see intense pain flash through Raidou's eyes, though his face didn't show it at all. Iruka rubbed his thumb over the thick skin, trying to offer the man some comfort. "I'm sorry. I didn't tell you this to upset you. Zoomer...he really did...does care for you, a lot, but I guess you heard that in the infirmary. It doesn't come down to you against him; it came down to a lifetime of shared experiences against a few days of a new bond. No one would have a real chance with either of them. They've practically been married for years, they grew up together..." He trailed off as he looked at Raidou, unsure if he was doing any good by saying this. "He really did care about you though. The fact that you were able to catch his eye at all means he cares about you a great deal. He never wanted to hurt you; I think you just really caught him off guard with all of this."

"Iruka I really don't want to hear about Izumo caring about me. I'm happy for him that he and Kotetsu will work this out, that I didn't ruin something as rare as the lo.... relationship they share. But please don't tell me he cares about me... I..." Raidou shook his head his lips tightening into a sharp line. "I don't want what I don't have to be more real." His insides were shaking he wanted to just scream, he didn't want to hear all that he didn't want what he had with Izumo to be something that might have been if there was no Kotetsu cause there is a Kotetsu. It wasn't fare to hate the young soldier, but for Raidou it was hard not to when he could only see him through a green haze. "Thank you for your warning though it may have saved me an embarrassing reaction if I found out at a different time." He stood up to give Iruka the signal that there conversation was over. "I'm glad we were able to sort thing out between us. I'll see you around," his voice was calm and as sooth as his gruff voice could be.

He wanted to tell Raidou not to do that, that he could talk about it if he wanted that shutting himself down like this wasn't helping. "I...bu-... yes, sir. I'm sorry." Iruka sighed and patted Raidou's arm before standing up. He hung his head, feeling guilty for making the situation worse as he headed to the entrance of the tent. He kept hoping that Raidou would stop him and they'd talk more but when he reached the canvas opening the older man still hadn't said anything. Iruka paused, wondering if he should say thank you again but he figured he'd said it once so he just stepped through the door, the canvas pulling over both his shoulders as his hands were folded neatly behind his back.

Raidou blinked his eyes and two fat tears dripped off his cheeks and darkened two spots on the front of his shirt. He had stared at the flaps of the canvas door for a long moment after Iruka disappeared through them. His chest and stomach felt like they would collapse inward should he even breathe. His blink though stunned his body into movement and he stepped back from the door, his legs now trying to escape what he'd heard. He stepped back until his legs hit the bed and he sat hard on his ass as two more tears where jerked from his eyes to land on his shirt. His mind seemed to have frozen, it wouldn't move or think. He could feel the pain pushing at him wanting him to break and if he let his mind move forward even a hair he would crumble.

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Izumo sat up and smiled as Tenzou walked back into the barracks, the sheepish grin on the man's face telling him that things with Iruka had gone well. He was so glad. Like most people, he wanted the very best for Iruka and Tenzou was at least good enough. It was painful to see Iruka alone, especially when he had Kotetsu. He wanted Iruka to be happy and loved; the slightly older man deserved at least that much. "I wasn't sure if you were coming back," he teased, grinning wider when Tenzou blushed a little. "But then, who could blame you? I take it you two settled things? Is Ru okay?"

"Yeah we settled things," Tenzou said with a wide smile. His cheeks were hurting from smiling and blushing and he rubbed his hand over them as he sat down on Iruka's cot across from Izumo. "We had a long talk and we are going to give a romantic relationship a try. As for how he is when I left him he was doing very well but he was leaving with Lieutenant Namiashi to have a conversation." Tenzou smile faded as Izumo's complexion turned pale, and he was reminded what he came to talk to Izumo about. "I didn't take Iruka aside to talk about our relationship though I needed to speak to him about something more important. A similar topic as the one I want to have with you." Tenzou aggressively rubbed his hands over his face trying to clear some of the personal emotion away that he felt for this topic. He looked back to Izumo with concerned eyes and a serious look. "Izumo I had a conversation with Raidou today and he explained that the beginning of your relationship wasn't exactly willing on your side," his voice was strained and his hands rang together as he watched the small brunet. "Are you okay Izumo? Did he hurt you? Or do you feel like you would want to take legal actions again him?"

The young chestnut haired man was mortified that other people were finding out about that. He hadn't wanted anyone to know. Telling Iruka was one thing but it just kept expanding. Besides, calling it non-consensual would be a bit of a stretch. "I...No, I'm fine. Please don't tell anyone about this." He pulled on his lip with his fingers, noticing how uncomfortable Tenzou was. "He...he really didn't rape me. It wasn't like that at all. I don't even remember if I said no. Please stop looking like that. It was..." He shut his mouth, not wanting to say something that wasn't true. He remembered now he had said no, half-hearted as it was, it was still no. "I don't want to press charges. I'm sure of that. So...please, just...just don't even think about it again. It's done, it's past, Ko and I are back together. It doesn't do either of us any good." He let out a big sigh, eager to change the subject. The last thing he wanted after what he'd done to Raidou was to get him in even more trouble, serious trouble. "I...I'm glad you and Iruka sorted things out. He was so upset earlier. He really didn't mean to hurt you. He likes you a lot."

"Umm Izumo there is a bit more to Raidou telling me about what he did to you. He ahh, he over heard you and Iruka talking out side the med tent this morning. He was in getting his bandages changed and the two of you were on the other side of the cloth wall. So yeah he told me about how Iruka felt but it also means that he heard you tell Iruka about what he did to you." Tenzou gave a soft frustrated sigh and looked at Izumo with regret in his eyes. "Our camp is in trouble right now Izumo and we can't let the men know now bad it's become. Our two highest ranked officers are not exactly the most moral of men, but right now Raidou is our best hope. Kakashi is by far the greater threat; he can easily destroy this camp. I need Raidou to step up and take Kakashi down let him know he is not all powerful and able to do whatever he wishes, that these men belong to Konoha not him." He looked to the floor not even really sure where he was going with this but he felt Izumo should know. "I don't know what it was about you Izumo but you changed him and he won't be able to go back from this... gods I hope he never goes back from this. Hearing you tell Iruka what he did to you made him see just now much like Kakashi he was becoming and he hates himself for it. You have woken something in him something good that has been dormant for a long time you awoke his humanity. He referred too himself as a "who" today I have only ever heard him call himself a "what". It may not sound like much to you but to me and Rei it is very big. Though he is hurting and is more confused then he has ever been he is on the verge of a change that can save him, free him from his prison of only being a weapon." The lieutenant gave a growl and stood up, "shit Izumo I don't even know what I'm saying, this can't make any sense to you."

Izumo very slowly shook his head, trying hard to process what he'd just heard. 'Raidou heard us talking. Did anyone else hear? Did he hear the part when I was saying what he'd done? He must have. What about when Iruka asked me if I love him? God, I hope he didn't hear that. We just can't ever be. My everything belongs to Kotetsu.' "No...I think I do understand. I wish I could help him, but I really don't think I can. I get the feeling that I've done enough at this point. Iruka is really lucky that Kakashi didn't hurt him, isn't he? Raidou warned me about him but I didn't tell anyone else. I feel like this is partly my fault. I was so caught up in my own drama that I didn't think..." Izumo sighed deeply and hung his head, his hands coming up to massage the back of his neck. "Why doesn't Rai just stand up to Kakashi? He's so much stronger, that's for sure. I don't understand why he wouldn't stop him. How could a man like Raidou be scared of anyone?"

Kakashi has a strange ability to... I guess control others. Raidou is so programmed into the army that as long as Kakashi is above him in rank Raidou will allow him to dominate him. He can't see even though his size is much more then Kakashi's he can't see how to stand against the man. Raidou sees himself as Kakashi's weapon a tool to be used when ever and how ever needed it wasn't till you shook everything about him that he has even been able to think beyond that. But Kakashi still controls him. I really don't expect you to do anything more Izumo I just though you should know what is happening because of you. That Raidou is on a scale between letting what happened with you ruin him or save him and if it does save him then maybe the pain you and Kotetsu went through will not be for nothing. Iruka is very lucky that Kakashi let him go, others have not been so lucky. People close to me have been suffering at his hands for years, I hope this will end soon but I'm very sorry that it has extended to you and has hurt you. If you wish to be transferred I can arrange it for you. You have been through a lot here."

Izumo thought about it, the prospect was appealing. He and Kotetsu presumably, could be off in another camp, not this crazy, fucked up piece of hell, not worrying about anything. But that wasn't true. He'd worry about Iruka and Genma like crazy. Not to mention all the new people they'd met. Kiba, Shino, Pearl, oh, and that Hayate guy that was in basic with them. They'd both constantly worry about what was going on with them. No, they'd settled things now. Soon Ko would get back and they'd get married and it would be clear to everyone that nothing was going to change their relationship, not even Raidou. "No, it's okay. I'd never go without Ko and even with him; we were put in this platoon. Genma and Kiddo would miss us so much. Plus the platoon would be out of balance. No, we're supposed to stay I think, though I might want to ask my fiancé when he gets back, assuming the offer is still open then. I shouldn't decide that all on my own. He's been through a lot too. Still, even if that's what people would think, I don't need to run away from Raidou."

"Fiancé eh? well isn't that a nice surprise," Tenzou gave Izumo a warm smile but felt nothing but dread for his friend he knew Raidou would be hurt to hear that. "The offer will still be open to you Izumo and to Kotetsu as well." Tenzou shifted on the bed. "So do you plan on getting married when your training here is over?" he thought he should be polite and talk to his soldier about something so big for him.

Izumo let a faint smile play on his lips but after their conversation, he didn't feel much like beaming like he should. "No, we're actually planning to get the captain to do it as soon as Ko gets back. We'll have a big thing with our families later but we just want to do it as soon as we can." Somehow when it was just a private thing between his lover and himself it had been so much more exciting. Maybe it was just a coincidence but every time he told someone new he was a little less excited about it. "We're planning on doing this small but I'm sure I speak for both of us when I say that we'd really like you to be one of our witnesses. We'll probably have the whole platoon but I know we'll want you to be there." When Tenzou nodded, Izumo grinned broadly, suddenly missing his lover very deeply.

"So, do you know why Raidou wanted to talk to Iruka?" he asked changing the subject. "Rei, isn't that the nurse?" He started in, not giving Tenzou a chance to reply. "You made it sound like they're close. Raidou thought they hated each other. Are they friends?"

"In Raidou's strange way I guess you could see them as friends. He doesn't really have any friends. He has co workers that he trusts and me and Rei who care about him. The three of us share a history that has created deep emotions for each other, it's not something easily explained. perhaps it has made us some sort of strange family." Tenzou rubbed his hand over his mouth it was one of his few tell tail signs of stress. "Izumo about you going to the captain about getting married please don't. He's a strange man that seems to be going through his own melt down. with the relationship you have with Raidou it would put you in a large amount of danger I think if you went to the captain on your own. Raidou would kill me for knowing you were going there and not stopping you and he would kill the Captain if he did anything to harm you. Izumo please let me handle that for you I can arrange it with the captain in a way that he won't even take interest in it. Please trust me with this Izumo."

Part of Izumo was ecstatic that Raidou still had that many feelings for him but at the same time that thought saddened him. He wasn't sadistic or cruel; he didn't want Raidou to be suffering. Still he also didn't want to start a new situation by not heeding his friend and commander's words. "Alright, sir. If you think that's best. I guess it doesn't really matter. You can just tell him I came to you about it. For a second there I thought you were telling me not to get the captain to marry us at all. Kinda freaked me out. we don't want to wait if we can help it." He thought about what Iruka had told him and what Tenzou had implied about the captain and swallowed thickly. "Yeah, sure, I'll leave that up to you, or I'll go with you. Either way..." He gave a bit of a sigh, thinking that it was nice that Raidou had people that he could sort of call family. Maybe he wasn't quite as alone as he thought. "Well, I guess we should probably get back to it, huh? It was nice of you to get me out of so much of this after noon's exercises," Izumo said with cheeky grin, his toe gently nudging Tenzou's.

Tenzou chuckled and reached across to pat Izumo's knee in a friendly manner, "Oh Izumo you have got it all wrong you haven't got out of anything you and Iruka will have to make up for what you've missed after dinner tonight. I'll meet you both at the sand castle at 1800 hours private." Tenzou stood up with a cocky smile and headed out of the tent to go and check what Raidou had wanted to talk to Iruka about. "You had better go catch up to your platoon so you have to spend less time with me tonight." He chuckled again at the stunned face of the young private.