CHAPTER SEVEN
"Doctor Grey," Erica Hahn said, spotting a flustered Meredith frantically running through the ED. "I owe you an apology."
"I'm trying to find the missing patient," Meredith said,
"It's okay," Erica said. "He's fine. There was a mix up and the nurses took him for a CT scan instead of another patient. He's back now and I'm doing the consult." Meredith breathed a sigh of relief. "And I'm sorry I was so hard on you. I had no idea that Derek was injured."
"It's fine," Meredith said. "Is the patient okay?"
"He's a little confused but he's fine," Erica replied. "How's Derek?"
"Stable, I think," Meredith replied. "I haven't been able to see him yet. We've been too busy here."
"Go and see him now," Erica said. "I can do the consult without you."
"Are you sure?" Meredith asked.
"I'm sure," Erica replied. "I'll page you if I need you."
"Thank you, Doctor Hahn," Meredith said. "I think Izzie and Alex are still looking for the patient."
"I'll take care of it," Erica said, still feeling guilty over the way she had treated Meredith.
Meredith rode the elevator to ICU where she stood nervously by the nurses' station, unable to go any further. She had welcomed the distraction of having so many patients to deal with in the ER because it had stopped her from falling apart completely. But now there was nothing to distract her from what she had to face.
"Meredith?" Meredith heard George's voice behind her. "Hey," he said sympathetically. "Are you here to see Derek?" Meredith nodded. George could tell how scared she was. "I just finished up with a patient. Do you want me to go with you?" Meredith nodded.
"Yeah that would be good," she said gratefully, relieved that George was there.
"I checked on him just before," George said, trying to reassure Meredith.
"How is he?" Meredith asked.
"His face looks just the same," George said. "Except he's on a ventilator. The burns are on his chest, arm and leg. Try to focus on his face." Meredith nodded, her eyes welling with tears. "Come on," George said. Meredith just stood there, her legs frozen and unable to move. George took her hand in his and led her gently to Derek's room. Meredith was glad that George was there. She didn't feel strong enough to go in there alone.
Meredith allowed George lead her inside to where Derek was lying unconscious. He was connected to machines, the way that Meredith saw patients all the time; however, the shock still hit her hard. She grabbed on to George for a moment to steady herself just as George's pager went off.
"Crap!" George exclaimed. This was not the time to be paged. "Mer, I'm so sorry but they're bringing more people into the pit. I have to go," he said reluctantly.
"It's okay," Meredith said. "Thank you," she added, appreciatively, grateful that George had been there. George gave Meredith a sad smile, his heart breaking for what she was going though, before he left her alone with Derek.
Meredith took a deep breath and went over to where Derek was. It was eerily quiet in the ICU ward, a stark contrast to the deafening roar of panicked civilians in the ER. Although George had told her not to, Meredith couldn't help but look at Derek's burns. They looked deep and painful; she knew from her training that they would require multiple skin grafts and that when he woke up he would be in an enormous amount of pain.
'Try to focus on his face,' Meredith repeated George's words in her mind. She took a seat next to Derek's bed and took his hand in hers. It was warm and comforting. Meredith's eyes wandered away from Derek's burns and to his face which hasn't been burnt. Meredith looked past the ventilator and kissed Derek on the forehead before running her fingers through his hair.
"I love you," she whispered. It wasn't something that she'd planned to say or that she regretted saying after. It had just come out as though it were the most natural thing in the world. Meredith closed her eyes and rested her head against Derek's, breathing him in. She wasn't sure how much time had passed before her pager went off, bringing her back to reality. Meredith didn't want to leave Derek but she couldn't leave patients stranded without a doctor either.
"I'll be back as soon, I promise," Meredith whispered to Derek, kissing him again on his forehead. "I love you," she said again before leaving the room.
It pained Meredith to leave Derek at a time like this. It was almost a physical pain, as though a lead weight was sitting on her chest. Meredith tried not to cry as she stepped back out into the hectic halls of the hospital. She waited for the elevator doors to open and when they did she went to the back of the crowded elevator where she spotted Alex. Meredith was glad to see him. She knew that he wouldn't ask her a million questions or tell her that everything was going to be alright when there were no guarantees. Alex simply put his arm around her, the way an older brother might do. Meredith leaned against Alex was they rode the elevator, trying to draw the strength that she needed from him to go back to the ER. When they reached the ER, Meredith gave Alex a little grateful smile before they went their separate ways.
xxxxxxx
"Stevens, you are on fire tonight," Mark said, impressed by his resident's skill and precision in the OR as they worked on another burn victim. Mark had been so distracted by his concern for Derek that he had needed Izzie to be his second set of eyes. She hadn't let him down. "Have you ever thought of plastics as a specialty?" Mark asked as they operated.
"Not really," Izzie confessed.
"That's a shame," Mark said. "You're great with these burns patients."
"I want to make their recovery easier," Izzie said as she removed dead skin from the unconscious patient's face. "The more we do in here, the easier it will be for them."
"That's right," Mark agreed. "You realize that there isn't a hospital around here that's better equipped to deal with burns patients?"
"I guess not," Izzie replied.
"That means that we're going to have back to back surgeries for the next few months. Skin grafts, facial reconstructions. All day every day. It isn't gonna be easy and I'm gonna have to put a team together so that we get the work done. How would you like to be on that team?"
"Are you serious?" Izzie asked.
"I sure am," Mark replied. "If you're half as good as you've been in the OR tonight we'll be lucky to have you."
"I will be," Izzie promised, smiling beneath her surgical mask. She couldn't wait to see the reactions of the others.
Thoughts?