Kitchen

Puck's POV

She was gone. I failed her. She was the only one who ever really got me, even when we weren't close she still understood me. Why couldn't I have just went with her to glee? I should have left the choir room to go find her, but no I didn't. Do you know why I didn't? I was afraid and look what that got me now. I lost my best friend and I have no idea if my mom is still alive.

"Hey." I turn to see Santana, Quinn, and Brittany enter the kitchen.

"Hey." I give them a little smile, before turning back to my drink in my hand.

"It's not your fault, Puck." Quinn says softly taking a seat by me.

"If I wasn't so scared, then maybe she would still be here." I tell her taking a drink.

"You know that's not true." Santana says grabbing the bottle of Jack Daniel's and pouring her some.

"San, Is right Pucky. Even if you would have went after Rachie she would have made you go with coach." Brittany says taking a sip out of Santana's glass.

"You don't know that." I grumble taking a big swig of the whisky, loving the way it burns my throat on the way down.

"I do know that and you do to."

I look at Brittany as she takes another drink from Santana's glass. I knew she was right. Rachel would have made me go with Sue. She would have made sure I was safe and made sure I knew to take care of the others. Even though I know that it still doesn't change anything. I still blame myself.

"You know she would kick my ass if she knew I was letting you three drink." I say with a little chuckle.

"Why?" Quinn asks raising an eyebrow at me.

"Well, you remember at the beginning of the summer when I had that huge party?"

"I remember some of it. Why?" Santana asks running her finger tip along the top of her glass.

"That night I promised Rachel that I would look out for you three, because of the last time you three drank a lot at the Glee party I had you all got really sick and a little out of control. So, Rachel made me promise to keep an eye on you until she got there, because she had a tournament that day. Well, let's just say I didn't really keep my promise and by the time Rachel got there you guys were starting to get sick. After that Rachel kicked everyone out of the house and took you three up to my room to take care of you." I say shaking my head at the memory. "The next day she ripped me a new one."

"So that's why we woke up in bed with Rachie?" Brittany asks causing me to choke on my drink. All three of them laugh at me.

"What she meant was is that we woke up beside her. All of us were still clothed." Santana laughs shaking her head at me.

It's not my fault I got really sexy images in my head when Brittany said that. All four of them are hot and all four them in bed together is like any guys dream. Well it is if that said guy was there to.

After talking about that party a little more we decided to go downstairs where the huge flat screen TV was to play dance central.

"Oh crap, that TV is huge." Santana says as her eyes widen comically.

I laugh at her reaction, because it's the same reaction everyone has. It's just funny.

I sit down on the couch with Quinn and Santana, while Brittany starts up the Xbox and plays.

"Are all those Rachel's trophy's and medals?" Quinn asks pointing to the shelves that hung on the wall.

"Yeah, most of them are boxing trophy's, but there's a few paintball trophy's we won together too." I reply looking over at them. I never really realized how many there were until now. There were probably a least 40 lined up on 3 shelves.

"Wow, I never knew you guys done paintball."

"We loved playing paintball. We were really good to." I say with a small frown as I think about how I was never going to be able to play again with Rachel. "I miss her."

"We miss her too." Santana whispers quietly. "We never even got a chance to tell her how we felt."

"We spent almost 3 yrs trying to hide who we were from everyone and then when the truth about all 3 of us being together came out, no one questioned it or anything, so that's when we decided that we was going to tell Rachel how we really felt about her." Quinn says still looking over at the trophy's.

"I never understood why you guys tormented Rachel and stuff."

"It's because we were afraid and in our freshman year some of the older Cheerios noticed us staring at Rachel and how close all three of us were. When they questioned we tried to deny it but they didn't believe us with out prove, so that's when we started to torment her and throw slushie at her. We knew that if we didn't people would question us about it and start to question us about how close we were and at the time we didn't want our parents to know or anyone for that matter, because Lima really wasn't the most open-minded town and not only were gay, but all three of us together. I know it's not really an excuse but we was young at the time and just so afraid." Santana says looking down. I could tell they hated the way they treated Rachel. I also knew that Rachel never held it against, maybe it was because she knew why they done it. Well, knew part of why they done it.

"She never held any of that against you guys. I think she knew why you done it. I'm not sure that she knew you guys liked her though, but she knew that fear was what kept you guys from coming out." I tell them remember the conversation me and Rachel had just after the girls came out. " She told me that no matter what you guys said or did she never would hold it against you and that she forgave you all for it, because she understood what it was like to be afraid and not wanting to show your true self."

"I don't understand how she could forgive us for all the names, slushies, and everything else. She should hate us." Quinn says softly leaning back against the couch. " I even hate us and what we done to her."

"She's never hated you. In fact she was in love with all of you." Puck says looking at Quinn, Santana, and now Brittany who stopped playing the Xbox. "She was actually planning on tell you guys soon. Well, she was planning on wooing you all and then telling you, because to her every girl deserves to be wooed."

"Why would she want to scare us?" Brittany asks with a confused face.

"He said woo Brit, not boo. It means she wanted to take us out on dates, buy us flowers or other things we would want, and romance us." Santana answers smiling at her.

"Oh." Brittany nods. I'm still not to sure if she really understands what Santana told her. "Wait, so does that mean she was going to buy me a duck? Because I really want one."

"Sure B." Quinn answers with a little laugh. Brittany does a little happy dance that makes us all laugh.

"Puck, is the girls down there with you!" I hear Sam yell from the top of stairs.

"Yeah!"

"We're going start fixing food, just thought I would let you guys know!" He yells again before we hear the door close.

"Well, how about we get upstairs and make sure they don't try to feed us something nasty or something." I tell them standing up and walking towards the stairs.

" Sounds like a plan." Santana says as her and the other two follow me upstairs.

Reaching the kitchen I see Coach Beiste and Ms. Pillsbury fixing some hamburgers in patties for the grill, while Tina and Mercedes was cutting up stuff for a salad. Quinn and Santana walk over and help Tina and Mercedes.

"Hey, Britt want to help me grill the burgers?" I ask her smiling when her eyes got big with excitement. I knew she loved doing that even since Rachel showed her how to use a grill at the Glee club cook out last year.

"Yes!" She yells hugging me. Everyone in the kitchen just smiled and laughed at the bubbly blonde. I was happy that I could a least make one person happy, I just hope I can keep the others happy to and be able to take care of them like Rachel would have.