10:30 PM.

Knock knock.

"Who is it?" I asked.

"It's Yukari. Can I come in?" she asked. "I need to talk to you about something."

I blinked before getting off my rolling chair, walking over to my door, and opening it.

She stood there, in the hallway. Pensively, she had her arms behind her back. I held the door open and gestured for her to come inside, my hand open and directed to my bed.

She walked over to my bed and sat upon it, still acting rather anxious. Her body tensed as she lowered herself onto my bed and settled her hands on her thighs. She crossed her legs and cleared her throat. "So…there's something I want to ask you. It's about you joining the club, a-and…"

She trailed off like she did back at the hospital, whenever she was nervous. Feeling that this was yet another heavy topic she wanted to speak about, I sat back in my folding chair and faced her. "What's wrong?" I asked. "You can tell me. Everything's out in the open now. If you're gonna be my partner, might as well get everything off your chest now."

"P-partner?" she stammered, her face turning a bit red.

"In battle, I mean," I succinctly stated.

She blinked. "O-oh. Right. Um…," she closed her eyes and breathed, like she was ordering herself to carry out a difficult task. "Why did you decide to accept the offer?" She then turned to look me in the eyes. "What's your reason for fighting?" She continued when I refused to respond, having opted to just avert my gaze, "I don't know about you, but earlier, you…seemed really on edge. I just want to make sure that…you're still okay."

"…I have two reasons," I muttered, shifting uncomfortably in my chair. "First, I want to protect this city. Of course. Monsters attacking it under my watch? There's no way I can let them threaten innocent lives. Not when I have the power to stop them."

"What's the second reason?" she asked, very directly. Very much the kind of way I approved of.

I crossed my arms as I replied simply.

"Hate spurns," I replied simply, giving her an even stare. My voice was calm, calmer than it had ever been—I kept it calm because she, of all people, deserved a straight answer. "Hate justifies you. It makes you move. Carries you when it's all you have, makes you lose all sense of fear and restraint. And that was all I remembered having felt during my battle against the Shadow, back at the dorm."

I then turned my head to the window facing my table, my hands balling up into fists. I didn't want to admit it to myself, but the feeling of cutting up that monster had been exhilarating. I felt my blood boil and burn beneath my skin just remembering the whole thing.

Anger now festered uncontrollably in me. The feeling was unreal, emotionally draining, but entirely satisfactory. Year after year of having had nothing to blame but the inexorable cruelty of the universe, I'd endured. And here, now, was something for me to pin all of my hatred and scorn. It was as if God had recognized my rage as righteous, and as such had handed me the right to vengeance. I knew that couldn't have been, though. I was just indulging in my own need for something to channel my hate. I am loathe to admit that it felt good, to drown in scorn. It felt wondrous, to want revenge.

"So, that's your reason for fighting?" Yukari, now looking stunned and even a tad disappointed, asked me. I turned back to her when she uttered, "Hate?"

Her words and her expression shamed me. "One of them, like I said," I quietly responded, too bitter to give a more biting reply.

A Midnight Chat

"…Are you sure you wanna go down that road?" she asked me, walking to me with trepidation in each step. "Fighting them out of hate?"

"What am I supposed to feel towards them? Nothing?" I blurted out, my voice having risen slightly. I sat up in my bed as I continued, Yukari having drawn herself backwards. Realizing the effect of my sudden outburst, I shifted my tone of voice back to one of placidity. "Horrors from beyond the veil of time and space are responsible for the death of my family. For ten years, I've had nothing but myself. Because of them. Who's to say I'm not in the right here? They're monsters. They all deserve to die."

My mind was blank again. All that surged through me now was malice. The idea that something as impossible—as demonic as that thing had been responsible for my family's death? It was too much. Like something out of some morbid fantasy story. But then again, what kind of answers was I looking for? The Dark Hour in and of itself meant that the world wasn't as sensible as I had wanted it to be. That only embittered me further.

Yukari shook her head, "You can't stay sane, fighting for something like that."

I laughed forcefully, "I'm not sane. Ask anyone back in Osaka."

Yukari then said, "I know I shouldn't dictate you on this kind of thing, but it doesn't…seem right to me."

"I'm no hero, Takeba," I said to her. "These monsters?" I then shook my own head and gritted my teeth, "We can't rely on virtue to put them down. Beings as fierce as they are deserve the same level of fierceness in taking them down. You were there, fighting that thing with me. You know what we have to do to stop them. Whatever it takes."

I didn't want to know if I was trying to convince her, or myself.

"Don't say that," she scolded, her hands now on her upper arms.

"That's what we're supposed to do," my hands had tightened into fists considerably, to the point where they were now turning white, "what we signed up for. I can't see it any other way."

"Can't, or won't?" Yukari courageously questioned, sounding like it had taken all of her strength to ask that.

I, unable to find any response of any kind, averted my gaze and stared out the window. Trying to block her words from my mind. The moment I tried to apologize for my words, she had already made it to my door.

"I don't even have much memory of my dad," she sighed as she relaxed her shoulders. "I know he loved me. And I love him. But…I don't even remember much of him." She turned to me, her hand letting go of the knob. "My mother, she and I aren't close. You remember, I told you that back at the hospital?"

I pursed my lips as I nodded submissively.

She continued, "Mom, she…after Dad died, she started jumping around from guy to guy. Even now, she's still doing it. It's not fair to my dad at all," she grunted, her eyes narrowing in disgust. "She and I don't talk that much anymore, even now. At first, I think I hated her. Now…now I'm not so sure."

She a somber, melancholic look; a look that matched the tone of her voice. "I don't have the right to tell you what you should or shouldn't be fighting for. I'm not even completely over what happened with my own mom, and I'm lecturing you on hate. But I know how it feels. At first, it feels good. At first, it makes you feel like you're on top of the world. But if you let it continue eating at you…you'll find yourself having walked a thousand miles in the wrong direction."

I gritted my teeth and frowned at her, "It's all I have."

"No," she kept her eyes locked on mine, "it isn't."

And then she left me to wallow in my own room. I sighed and shifted my hand through my hair.

Dark Hour.

I was supposed to be sleeping.

"Good evening."

A child. Dead eyes. Striped pajamas. Wide grin, stretching from ear to ear. Whimsical, uncanny, wispy, unnatural voice. He stood at the door, watching me intently. His eyes peering into my own. The air felt like it was made of lead from his presence alone, and as he inched closer to me, as he hopped onto my bed—hopped next to me—like the child he looked like he was, the empty space around me crowded into me—like I was being pushed into my own gravitational pull.

I was frozen. I didn't know what to do, or what he was planning. Was he going to kill me? Was he going to eviscerate me? Was he going to rip me apart, limb by limb? His corpse-like eyes shone horridly in the green light of the Dark Hour, and that, coupled with the unearthliness of his skin tone and the general dangerous aura I felt around him, would've been bad enough, but no. The skin, nor his eyes, nor his aura were what made me shudder.

…Is he smiling?

"How are you?" the boy asked, in an actually concerned tone of voice. He tilted his head, his eyes graduating from their rather bloodcurdling stare into a much friendlier one.

"How…did you get in here?" was the first thing that had come to mind, and so I stammered it out as sweat caked my body and the ability to create words just left me.

"I'm always with you," the boy said like it was as simple as the answer to What color is the sky? And as I regretted asking him my question, as his unblinking and grey and dead eyes remained fixed on me, fixed in their position, he put a finger to my lips—the finger was cold to the touch, like a frozen popsicle—and he merely stated, "Soon, the end will come. I remembered, so I thought I should tell you."

I thought of the Shadows. I thought of the battle on the roof. I thought of Yukari. I thought of my family. I thought of S.E.E.S., and the offer of theirs I'd accepted just earlier. I thought of these monsters and these nightmares, and I thought of everything that had occurred in the last ten years—and I realized I'd never considered the Dark Hour as something necessarily apocalyptic in nature.

"The end…? Of what?"

"The end of everything." He said like he was trying to impress me, trying to scare me—the ends of his smile reached beyond his ears, it seemed. To attempt to replicate it would result in a broken jaw, one that would take four years to fully repair itself. "But to be honest," he continued, his voice for some reason gaining a regretful tone, "I don't really know what it is."

I blinked. All the suspense having dropped dead somewhat. "Well, that's informative."

And then he suddenly began smiling again, and all at once the horror and the cold and the fear reached me once more. "It seems you've awakened to your power, and what an unusual power it is. It takes many forms, yet is bound by none. It may prove to be your salvation, depending on where you end up. I expect you to honor our commitment," he said, drawing closer to me, his cold breath on mine—I saw smoke emerge from his mouth and the smell—the smell—it smelled of dead cats and rotted feces—"I'll be watching over you, even if you forget about me."

His eyes. His eyes, I saw them, his pupils were not pupils, they were spirals, endless spirals. Spiralling into themselves, drowning in themselves. Like whirlpools. His skin shook and shimmered in the green light of the Hour—it looked fake, like it could fall off at any moment and expose the carcass within. The air had become colder just by his presence alone—his gaze sent my body into a shivering fit, like I'd been thrust into the harshness of space wet and naked.

"Okay, then, see you later."

And as he made his leave, as he wandered off into the night, as he left my room so casually—the thought of him leaving hit me and I breathed. I clasped my mouth with my right hand and keeled over. My chest knotted and a cold sweat washed over me. I shook and trembled, my fingers tightening around my face as my free left hand jittered. Tears started emerging from my eyes—

—but then I realized he could have known something about the Dark Hour.

I ran. I got out of my bed and I opened my door, darting my head around. Searching, seeking that kid. But he had vanished. He had left my room no less than five seconds ago. He must have left some trace of himself. I should have been able to at least see him. But he was gone.

Like he'd never even existed.

And so I slapped my forehead as I returned to my bed. Unable to sleep for the rest of the night.

The following morning, I was in a sour mood.

The whole ride on the monorail was basically me just slouching indifferently in my seat while Yukari awkwardly shuffled in her own seat. Neither of us knowing what to say to break the awkwardness, we said nothing—making the situation even more awkward, making me ponder more and more about the horror I'd witnessed just hours ago.

The kid was still in my mind. When I'd blink, I'd see him. When I'd think, all my thoughts would be of him. His voice was still in my ears, my mind. I heard his whispers, his poison — all of it swarmed and festered in my head like snakes and centipedes fighting and killing each other.

Perhaps it was for the best that I didn't tell either Yukari this. How well would that conversation go? "I see kids who tell ominous prophecies and talk to me while I try sleeping in bed?" I hadn't the courage to be so bold.

The hours of the school day, I'd hoped, would drown the thoughts of the previous night out. But before I even knew it, the bell had rung…and the thought of what had happened last night still terrified me, gripped me, made me want to break down just at the implications alone. What did that kid know about the Dark Hour? And why would he come to me, of all people?

Why? Why?

What was going on!? Why was any of this even happening!? Tartarus, Shadows, the Dark Hour, Personas, that kid — how was I supposed to handle all of these things? S.E.E.S. was fighting against impossible odds, and I'd just joined up with them. How were we supposed to make any sort of difference? None of us even had driver's licenses yet!

What could we do? What difference could we make? How small were we? How large was everything else?s

Were we really going to end the Dark Hour and save this city from the Shadows? Or were we just grasping at straws and fighting because we were the only ones who could?

Was I really going to avenge anyone through this journey, or...

...or am I going to fail, like I always do?