Chapter 7: Home Cooking and Pillow fights
Recap:
"Can you go sit over there? I will teach you how to cook ok?"
"OK! Tobi be a good boy and do as pretty lady says"
"For one, you don't put already cooked biscuits back into the oven"
"So that's what Tobi was doing wrong"
Kagome proceeded to teach him to cook. By the time the steak was done
cooking Tobi was on her last nerve. So she let Tobi pour the drinks.
"Tobi a good boy"
"Yes Tobi is a good boy"
"YAY! No one ever says Tobi is a good boy. And now pretty lady says Tobi is a good boy. Tobi like pretty lady."
"Tobi….." Kagome was at wits end now. Tobi, not paying attention had just poured orange juice into a cup on milk.
"Yes Kagome-sama?"
"Shut up and restart"
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Kagome had barely finished setting the table when Shippo and Kuza came in. Kuza looked smug, which meant she must have terrorized Kisame again. Tobi ended up eating quickly and leaving the room, saying something about the other members not liking him.
Kagome had them eat and go back to Tobi's room before even telling anyone dinner was done. She had gone all out. She made plenty of steaks, some were almost raw. Tobi had told her that the plant man, Zetsu, liked his meat rare. So she thawed out a few steaks but didn't cook them. Right now they are sitting in a plastic bag on the counter incase he doesn't like what she cooked.
She placed the food on the table. Other then steaks there was spaghetti, a mountain of biscuits, some garlic bread, corn, mashed potatoes, gravy, the whole shindig. She seriously hoped they liked it. She didn't want to be on bad terms with the people she actually got along with. Opening the Dining room door, she let the smells of the food caress every corner of the lair.
She put a sign on the door that said 'You can come in and eat, IF you have first washed you hands' and quickly closed it. Putting up a barrier that did as the sign said she sat down and waited. No one would get in without washing their hands first. Not even through the Kitchen.
The first person who actually did as the sign said and got through the barrier was Itachi. His eyes widened and mouth watered. Kagome giggled as he stood there and stared for at least two minutes.
"You know, it's real. You can sit down and eat it" she said sarcastically. She could hear Hidan cussing his head off cause he couldn't get in. Itachi did as he was told and dug in. She was glad she made enough for an army; he looks like he hadn't seen real food for a long time. And from what she saw Tobi doing in the kitchen, she wasn't really surprised.
The next to come in was Leader and Kakuzu. Who reacted the same way as Itachi had. Well, they sat down and dished up their plates before staring wide eyed at the meal before them.
Oh how Kagome needed a camera right then. She would have so much blackmail it wasn't even funny. Ok, it was hilarious but still…
The next few in were Deidara, Sasori, Kisame, and Zetsu. The first three dug right it. Piling their plates high and stuffing their faces. Zetsu just sat down and sampled everything, but didn't even put anything on his plate. Kagome noticed this and walked into the kitchen. The guys thought Zetsu offended her and turned to glare at him, who only shrugged.
She came back out hiding something behind her back. She threw the offending item across the table to Zetsu, which he caught easily. He looked at the bag with the raw meat in it and then back at her.
"Tobi told me you liked your meat raw. So I kept a bag of it in the kitchen if you didn't eat the other stuff." She shrugged.
"Thank you" Zetsu's statements made everyone at the table drop their forks, including Leader. She looked curiously around at their shocked faces.
"Did Zetsu just say 'Thank you'" Kisame exclaimed, "I must be hearing things, he NEVER says 'Thank you'"
Both Kagome and Zetsu glared at them making them resume their meal peacefully. Hidan finally got the idea that he was supposed to wash his hands before the barrier would let him in. He was cursing Kagome and her stupid bag of tricks when he came in and sat down to eat.
"This is delicious Kags, how did you know how much to make?" Deidara said between bites.
"Maybe she was a slave, and cooked for her whole town" Kisame theorized. Kagome just smiled pleasantly in his direction.
"Kisame, do you know my special ingredient in my spaghetti?"
"No"
"Its fish eggs" Everyone but Kisame knew she was joking. But he got up and ran to the kitchen and spit out his mouthful of spaghetti.
"You know I was kidding right" Kagome couldn't stop laughing. Then again, nether could some of the other members ether. Kisame just glared at them all and resumed his meal. He didn't say another thing except to compliment Kagome's cooking after that.
"Kags, you never did answer my question; How did you know how much to make?" Deidara questioned again.
"Well, from the looks of Tobi's cooking skills I guessed you might not have seen real food in a long time. So I made three times the amount I do for my friends back home. And it was enough, might even be some leftovers that you guys can eat for lunch so that I'm not cooking every minute of the day"
They all nodded in agreement and started wolfing down whatever number plate they were on. The first one to leave was Zetsu. He had finished his meat, and even ate some of the rawest cooked steaks she made. Nodding his appreciation he left the room.
No one else left until the biscuits and Garlic bread were gone. Picking up the plates that said food items were on she took them into the kitchen, Deidara and Kakuzu followed with their plates. They gave their thanks and left while she started cleaning up. She filled up the sink with water and put the dirty dishes in it to soak the entire food residue off. She walked back to where the rest of the gang were and picked up Zetsu's dishes and empty steak plate.
Those also went into the sink filled with soapy water.
Leader was the next to leave. He himself carried his own dishes into the kitchen and dumped them in the sink.
"That was great Kagome." He put simply while walking out the door. It went on like this until Hidan was the last one there. By the time he was done, she had finished all the other dishes and put the leftovers away. Washing his plate quickly she put it away.
She took a five minute break before resetting the table, but this time with everything upside down so dust wouldn't get on the part they eat off of. She even made breakfast for the next morning and used a little of her powers to make sure the eggs and bacon stayed warm and the juice and milk to stay cold. Now she wouldn't have to cook again in the morning. Scribbling a small note on a piece of paper she folded it in half and set it at the head of the table with the message 'To The guys' in big letters on the outside.
Finding the room she had to share with Hidan and Kakuzu wasn't hard. She just had to follow the sounds of Hidan's cursing. This could be heard all over the lair.
She was greeted by an unwanted sight when she got there. Hidan, standing outside the door, in a towel, trying to get in. But Kakuzu wouldn't let him in. What a great way to start their 'sleepover'.
Ignoring Hidan she walks slowly up to the door and knocks on it. Taking a deep breath Kagome begins her lovely, poetic rant.
"Kakuzu, I am not in a good mood and I am tired. You had better open this mother fucking door before I break it down and shove it up your ass" she purred dangerously. The door opens the next second and Kagome turns and grins at Hidan triumphantly before walking in and plopping on the first bed she saw. Which of course, just HAD to be Hidan's…
"Hey that's my bed, get off." He said while pulling on a shirt. Kagome averted his eyes while he put on his boxers.
"I only see two beds in here, so since you are such a gentlemen" Kakuzu snorted at that comment, "You would let me have the bed until we get another one for me."
"Ha, fat chance" He smacked her in the face with…..with….a pillow.
Oh now it's on!
Snatching the pillow she was using, she oh so delicately used it to pummel him into the wall. A large pillow fight followed. Kagome, an expert at pillow fights thanks to her modern time friends quickly creamed Hidan who had experience what so ever. He called her a wench and she cut his arm off. Or course more verbal battering followed in which Kagome also won.
By the time Hidan agreed to give her the bed, he had both his arms and legs cut off and his head. Kagome was still sitting cross legged on his chest smirking evilly. Kakuzu had merely observed the whole ordeal with a sadistic smile. Kagome was now trying to get Hidan to admit his defeat and she would put him back together.
"FINE! You win and are much more powerful then little weak me and I swear to Jashin that I will never call you another vulgar name other the Kagome or a nice nickname" Hidan relented. Kakuzu burst into laugher and went back to counting his money.
"That wasn't so hard now was it?" Kagome tapped his chest twice and his body reassembled. Getting up she promptly threw him one of the pillows and a blanket before curling up and falling asleep. Not bothering to change into her night clothes.
"Damn woman stealing my bed" A shoe hit Hidan in the head.
"I heard that" came a muffled reply from the half asleep girl.
Kakuzu just chuckled. This was gonna be hilarious.
Life would be much more interesting for the Akatsuki with Kagome around.
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BOW DOWN TO YOUR OVERLORD AND MASTER!! This is the THIRD time I updated today. I haven't got a lot of votes for who should Kagome be paired with. I need to now what you guys would like. Be grateful and review my readers. REVIEW!!
Next Time:
The Akatsuki members find Kagome's surprise note. And they hear from Kakuzu how Kagome won over the bed from Hidan. Kagome finally starts on the food making for the banquet to announce the new member of the Akatsuki to said organization's allies.