Right well i have been off writing another fic which was just a oneshot called Crashed PLEASE REVIEW lol ... erm and now with little song fics which i love at the moment i am trying to bring this fic along the way because you guys have been so good to me and i haven't been keeping up with my end of the deal lol ... so i am going to keep writing ... a bit of writers block right now ... but hopefully it shall clear up as this gets rolling lol ... ON WITH THE FIC !

Okay this is going to be a serious chapter with some pretty nasty topics in, so if you are offended easy or don't like things like adult topics then this is not for you ... if so read on :) Thanks X

The morning sun was shininy down on the hotel, the cool air from the Ac in the building was cut short from the beating heat of the early morning light. The chairs from the bar and restaurant came out on to the large decking, which over viewed the amazing green views. The pool area to the side was empty for the time of day unlike the eating area which was becoming packed with guests. Mark and Chris both walked over to the pool area and took a seat on the lounge chairs. Getting as comfortable as possible, the silence which was ment to be uncomfortable in these situations was not so bad. Mark leaned up and turned to face Chris, he needed to think, where the hell would he start in a conversation like this.

"Right, Chris you and me haven't really talked much apart from the wrestling match preps and the random talks in a big groups, so this is going to suck as long as you know that." Mark stated with a slight add of humor in his voice, relaxing Chris, just letting him know it's a friendly talk, not an argument.

"Yeah i know, i just have no idea what it's going to be about."

"Ahhhh yeah, Well truthfully it's going to be mostly about Jeff. His past and everything you don't know about him."

"I still know alot about him."

"Yeah you do, well what he wants you to know."

"What's that suppose to mean?"

"That means no matter how long you have known Jeff for or how deep into a relationship you got with him, he will never tell you the full truth. He's just a kid who is to scared to tell someone everything 'cos he is scared they are going to hate him, more than he thinks they already do ... you got me?"

"Yeah i think so."

"Good ... Well first a question which entales a truthful answer or i will come after you ..."

"Okaaaay... What?"

"What the hell do you want from him?"

"Mark for fucks sake don't go over this again"

"Hey, don't go all defensive over it, i just really want to know what the hell that you are expecting from him."

"I'm expecting nothing honestly, you can't expect anything from Jeff because he expects nothing from you."

"Now i'm lost ... explain?"

"Look Mark i have been with Jeff before and ..."

"And lets be honest you guys were fuck buddys"

"Mark! We were not just fuck buddys, we didn't have the most conventional relationships in the world but he was way more than that to me. We talked, i know him and he knows me, we were young and having fun at the time. We both fucked up in the end, but now we have grew up a little and are now looking towards a happier time. Just it seems like you are trying to stop it, everything that we do you want to stop it even if he is having a good time...why?"

"He is not going back to the way he was before! The drugs, self abuse, the alcohol ... he is not going back to that, and i'm not letting him take the risk of getting hurt again, so he will go back to that."

"I'm not going to hurt him, i love him for fucks sake!"

"Chris, you love him yes but you don't know the full extent of Jeff."

"Then fucking tell me!!!!, I am not going to love him less just because of shit in the past!"

"THAT IS WHAT HE THINKS!"

"What?"

"Look am not telling you the things he will tell you in time, right now i want yes no answers to these questions ... Okay?"

"Yes"

"Okay ... Are you with Jeff for the long hall?"

"Yes"

"Will you stand by him even when he's at his worst?"

"Yes"

"Will you take all of my shit Matt's shit Shawn's shit and Hunter's shit?"

"Yeah!"

"Okay answer this as you will ... Why ? ... Why are you willing to do all of that?"

"Because ... beacuse ... 'Cos i love him." Chris looked down playing with his fingers ... it was the first time anyone had actually heard him say it sincerly other than Jeff.

Mark tillet up his head looked him in the eye and smiled ... "Thats the answer i was looking for kid"

Chris smiled back and then clicked on ... "Hey! i'm not kid"

"Yeah but i'm old so your a kid" The deadman laughed

As the laughter and fun mood calmed, both of the wrestlers understood that serious talk was ahead.

"Mark ... What really happened?"

"From the top?"

"From the top .."

"Well here we go ... When Matt and Jeff were kids they lived with their mom and dad in cameron ... When they were still young as you know there mom died and it was just their dad to look after everything, and Jeff didn't take the loss well, he thought he was been punished or something he would always say "What have i done wrong? I just want mom back" it was really tough. Then even at that age Matt and Jeff were becoming alot to handle Matt was fine Jeff on the other hand was a riot to handle. There dad was working alot had to hold jobs together the house and became alot more in fintrested riends than his kids. Their dad got sick and put them in a home for adoption and upped and left, so that ment they had lost both parents and this didn't help Jeff. By this age Matt was out most nights and Jeff was still been anti-social and refusing to talk to anyone new. In the end they got split Matt got to live with his friend and wanted Jeff to go and fought with everything he could, but Jeff got shipped off and went to an endless string of horrible homes. Some of them did things to him which when he came back he wasn't the same most were out of state but he ended back in North Carolina more than a few times. The kid got so much abuse and Matt did everything in his power to get him back trying to see him as much as posible and in the long run look after him. Jeff talked to no fucker, he got so scared to talk that he just didn't in the end, however one day he and Matt were talking and Jeff broke down telling him everything what happened in the carehomes or new houses he was put up in. So with that he got put into a new home closer to Cameron and nearer Matt and it was a good place to be. No abuse, no harm, no fear ... just a good home. But still jeff didnt see it like that, he was still scared of people and was at an age of high school so that was very difficult ... and ... erm ... he .. erm"

"Mark ... You okay?"

"Yeah, it's just am thinking of how much shit he has actually been through ... it's like yeah people see alot but when you think of it ... it's so much to go through ... more so when your a kid."

"I know Mark, thats why am here for him 100 percent of the way" Chris smiled

"Good, anyways ... Erm ... Yeah ... Jeff ended up in highschool with no one around him, he hated it, he refused to talk to people and went off on his own. Then suddenly this guy came along from no where, his name was Trent. Lets just say Trent didn't win the award for rolemodel of the year. On one side he got Jeff talking, to alot fo people. but on the other side, it was the wrong type of people. Jeff would come back to the home late, he would come in drunk or high, not do any work, he was a kid from hell. In the end they called it quits and said he wasn't aloud to see Trent any more ... Very bad move on their part, 'cos it just made him do it more, stay out later and piss them off even more."

"Jesus, what happened after that? ... How did you end up finding him?"

"Well that comes later ... Jeff at that time was losing it mostly, started to only talk to Trent and it became more than friends, which is what no one wanted. Trent was his life and then there was police buissness and Trent had to go. Jeff was broken ... thats all that can be said was he was broken."

"So when Trent left, Jeff left? ... well mentally anyways"

"Yeah exactly Chris. Jeff only trusted Trent and with him leaving so soon it was another person or another thing Jeff not to trust. Anyways ... Matt was still trying to find a way to get Jeff to him safe and just get him into a good life, when he found me. His dad kept his mom's side of the family away from them, So i was kept away from them and when she died i still thought they were with Gil, but he fucked off. So when i heard about all of this i got a plane to Cameron.

"That was it?"

"What was it?"

"Just, This randomer AKA Matt rang you on the phone and you just went to find some kids you had no idea about, apart from they were you sister's children?"

"Yeah, they are my blood, Matt sounded desperate and everything that was said about Jeff i needed to make sure, take that risk because even if it was wrong or what ever, if i found out later it was true i could never forgive myself. But in all honesty Chris i knew from the start what Matt was telling me was true, reason been once he said his dad had pissed off somewhere, it all made sence."

"So then what happened? you came down to Cameron and looked after Jeff and Matt? then what?"

"Well Matt was busy with college jeff was still in highschool, refusing to talk to anyone, i was hopping in and out of the house 'cos of been on the road all the time. It was crazy ... I got Jeff talking a little got him trusting we got him training with me and Matt, slowly we were building up his trust and confidance again."

"Then he got into wrestling?"

"Exactly, he loved it, it was an outlet... like i could talk to Jeff and no emotion would show ... non at all, but when he got in that ring, all his emotions would flow out. So he was on a comeback, he would talk a little more each week, interact more, smile a little more, less harm and eat more ... just little steps ... and to top off all of the good work ... he found the love of his life."

"Me?"

"Yeah pretty much."

"I was his down fall?"

"However the only thing that can bring him up again"

"What do you mean?"

"Jeff has always hated things, the only things i have seen him care for is his dog Dakota his art and writing book his music and some of the loved ones around him ... thats it. Most people love alot more than hate, but Jeff hated so much, and the thing he hated the most was himself. So when he found someone who he loved he never thought he was good enough"

"He never thought he was good enough?!"

"No thats why he drank and drugged himself into the floor."

"Wow ... But i told him everyday i loved him that he was perfect ... everything and meant it."

"I know that I know you ment it Chris too, but you can say it one billion times over and if he belives something he wont stop thinking it. We tell him trust us and we care and we love him everyday without fail 'cos it the truth, but depending on his days he wont belive us."

"Jesus it was so easy before it was all fun, like go out party and drink have sex and wake up and do it all again ... i didn't know he had it all this hard."

"It's never this bad, it depends on his days honestly with you here now, he's so much better he's talking alot more again and going places without me beside him."

"So now?"

"We go in and talk ... not to much just enough to get it throught to him, just not to much 'cos he may freak out."

"So this is it? It's all i need to know?"

"I may have missed things out, 'cos Jeff still has things hidden from me, but he will probablys tell you first in all honestly."

"I just want him happy"

"I know you do, we all do" Mark smiled

"I love him"

"I know you do Chris, and thats why i have told you all of this. I trust you, i was angry at first ... more jelous because you walked in here and then Jeff made all tis progress with some guy who i thought fucked him over. But know i see where the hell everyone stands now. Where you are, where i am, and mostly where Jeff is."

"Thanks Mark"

"No problem Chris" Mark stood up and hugged Chris

"Come on lets go back up, i could really use breakfast"

"All ways with the food Chris, You will get fat you know?"

"Ha like hell, i don't do fat, i shall be slim for life"

"Like hell! When you bcome old and fat, all am going to do is laugh, lets see if Jeff loves you then"

"Ooooo Mark burn"

While the witty banter continued up to the hotel room Jeff was pacing again looking like a kidd on a sugar rush. He heard the door open and flung himself in the direction of the people coming in.

"WHAT EVER HE TOLD YOU WAS A LIE!"

Chris just laughed, placed is hands on either side of his face and kissed him lightly.

"Shhhh Kidd, we will talk later, right now it's time for food and chillin' as the day is still young."

"But ... what about ... but"

"Shhhh, we can deal with it all later, right now come on lets go. Matt get ya ass out of bed and eat"

"Right okay fine lets go"

The foursome walked out the hotel room to be greeted by Adam and Shawn. Jeff and Adam walked ahead and started a small argument to where the small short passage of time from the rooms to the eating lounge, became a walking wrecking ball with Jeff and Adam attacking one another and Chris haveing to break it up.

"This 'aint over kidd" Adam yelled in a joking manner

"What ever old timer"

"Jesus Jeff what is old to you?" Chris wanted to know as he had been on the resiving end of that taunt sevral times.

"Like ... say late 20's"

"My god Jeff, you are going to dred hitting 30"

"Noooooooooo, me never going to hit 30"

"And why is that?!"

"Me to pretty." Jeff smiled stuck his tounge out and ran off.

Chris watched Adam and him interact apparently this is one of Jeff's good days. Hope there is more to come ...

Wow reason one for it been so late is this was a bitch of a chapeter to write. I hate it to be honest. Plus i tryed to think how hard it would be to tell someone i wanted this chapter to be serious and what not and the mood and tone to be edgy, like i know what it's like to an extent, but it was so difficult to write it from some ones point of view when you haven't been there yourself so i tryed to put some real motion into it. But there will be more on the way, and i will try to get it done asap X much love X ... READ AND REVIEW PLEASE xXx