Whatever It Takes

Summary: Tori Vega is a good actress, but she's tired of pretending. All she wants is her old life, her old friends, and her girlfriend back. When leaving is hard, coming back can be even harder. Jade West is tired of the pain, tired of feeling sorry for herself, and ready to start fresh. But sometimes you just can't let go of the things you love, even after they've hurt you.

Pairing: Jori

Rated: M

TPOV

I'd been laying around the apartment for an hour now, it was early Sunday morning, hardly even 7 o'clock, I'd gotten home pretty early last night and gotten in a nice relaxing bath that I missed out on Friday night because I'd been swarmed by paparazzi and I couldn't go home until I shook them.

Now I was sitting on the couch watching the TMZ from Friday night, trying not to think about the fact that I told Jade I wouldn't like anyone that wasn't her. Every time I thought about it my stomach fluttered and I just started grinning like an idiot. She'd seemed caught of guard when I said it and started acting all flirty, and she would not stop glaring at Crystal throughout the day while we were recording.

My phone buzzed on the couch beside me signaling a text message. Slowly I uncurled and reached over to grab it, unlocking it and opening my messages.

From Jade: you coming over? I was serious about the offer; I can't handle all these kids alone and my dads not much better.

I bit my lip, fighting the smile threatening to take over my face. I quickly texted back that I'd be over soon and slipped off the couch heading to my bedroom. I quickly curl my hair and put on some makeup, hoping Jade would just assume it was incase cameras caught me, even though it was for her. I shimmied into a pair of light wash jeans, pushed my feet into a pair of converse, grabbed a pair of sunglasses and made my way out the door, snagging my purse of the kitchen table before I left.

It was strange for me to walk up to Jade's house, I was nervous. There were balloons tied to the mailbox and a 'parties here' sign. I stepped up the door and knocked, I got no answer. I knocked again, and beyond the door I heard a crash and Jade cursed. I pushed the door open and stepped in, "Jade?"

"Kitchen!" she yelled back. I pushed the door shut and walked quickly to the kitchen, stopping short in the doorway when I almost stepped on glass, "I'll go get the broom." I tell her. She's standing there looking at the glass angrily, barefoot and in a pair of pajama shorts.

I go over to the closet beside the stairs and find the broom and dust pan stashed there and head into the kitchen. I sweep up the glass quickly and dump it in the trash while Jade carefully moves through the kitchen to get a new glass for whatever she needed. This time she grabbed a plastic one, "they're kids so they don't really need glass, right?" she joked, carrying it past me, motioning for me to follow her out to her back yard. Her pool was filled now, and two tables were set up with party things.

"Tori!" James screamed, he ran toward and launched himself at me, arms spread. He hit me like a ton of bricks and almost knocked me over, "I missed you! Nobody makes ice cream Sundays the way you do!"

"So you missed my ice cream? I'm feeling the love." I tease, giving him a crushing hug in return, "happy birthday."

"Thank you!" he said as I let him go, he took off again, over to a table where his dad was standing, and he hadn't turned around. I wandered over to Jade who asked me to help her sort out bags for each kid.

"I'm going to go get changed, just tie them up and set them out." I nod and continue to stuff the bags while Jade walks off. Once I have one of each thing in the bags I tie them off and lay them out across the tables, when I'm done Jade comes back downstairs, dressed in a white t-shirt and a pair of shorts. She's got bathing suit strings sticking out of her shirt.

"Anything else?"

"No. Now we just wait for the kids." We don't have to wait long, the first two kids show up five minutes later, coming in through the back gate where there parents leave them with us, happy for the break from the screaming kids. They're all hyped up and excited, and as soon as the last party go-er shows up they're all begging to go into the pool.

"Okay, go ahead." Jade's dad says, the kids rush into the pool screaming with laughter. Jade's dad wanders inside and I find a spot to sit and watch them. Jade's standing by the back door in the shade, eyes hidden by sunglasses. I smiled at her, she smiled back. Out of nowhere music came on, I spotted the speakers behind me, and Jade's father came out, dressed in a loose shirt and some shorts.

I hadn't seen him dress this casual during the majority of the time I'd lived here, he'd always been in suits, or at least a pair of dress pants and a button up. He had a pair of sunglasses on, too, and some sun block that wasn't quite rubbed in on his arms. He walked over to me slowly, watching the pool, and grabbed a chair on his way, setting it down beside me.

"Didn't expect to see you around here anytime soon, Miss Popstar." He smiled at me, I smiled back, "so how'd Jade rope you into this mess?"

"I had nothing better to do, honestly, and it's a nice break to just sit and relax…as relaxing as this is, anyways." I comment, watching James canon ball in and splash his friends with a pretty big wave of water, "took the day off work?" I inquired.

"Yes, not every day your son turns 13."

"Jade!" James screamed when he broke the surface, "come swim!"

"Not gunna happen." She called back from the safety of the shade.

"Chicken!" he called back, she didn't seem to care about the name calling and he turned to me, "Tori?"

"No suit, sorry." I replied, shrugging one shoulder. He pouted and turned back to Jade, pouting, Jade turned her head away from him and he scowled at her, soon enough, though, one of his friends distracted him and he joined in on their game of Marco Polo. The backyard grew silent with the exception of the music.

"So how's the music going? I heard you're doing some songs for Jade's movie with her."

"Yeah, we had a duet for the soundtrack and I have a single going on it, too. I finally got a permanent backup band and now I've just got to finish up this next album and I can take a break for awhile to finish school before I go back on tour-or at least that's my plan." I comment, chewing on the inside of my lip, "how've you been? I really miss being here…"

"We've all been pretty good, Jade hasn't been home a lot with her movie, so it's mostly been James and I, and I can make mean pancakes but I'm useless in the kitchen with anything else."

"Take out every night?" I laugh, he nods not even a bit embarrassed, "pizza for their lunch today, then?"

"Yes, it should be here soon, do you mind going to check, actually? Here's the money." He hands me some money and I get up, nodding, and walk out the back gate around the front of the house. I'm only outside for a few minutes when Beck's truck, topped with the pizza light, rolls up. I walk over to his truck and meet him around the front.

"Tori, what are you doing here?"

"Supervising." I reply, handing him the money. He counts it and then pockets it, "I'll see you at school tomorrow."

"Alright, tell Jade she owes me ten bucks." He comments, getting into his truck. I give him a puzzled look but he offers no answer so I just shrug and walk back around, setting the pizza on the tables. There's two cheese and two pepperoni, and as soon as I'm through the gate the kids are rushing to the tables.

"Alright! Quiet!" Jade screams when they all start shouting pizza requests, "there's enough for all of you to get one of each, so those who want pepperoni, raise your hand!" they all raise their hands and I pass out the pepperoni slices while Jade passes out the cheese.

Jade, her dad, and I sit down in chairs near the table and each eat a slice, "Jade, Beck says you owe him ten bucks." I tell her between bites of my pizza. She scowls and doesn't say anything. They're all jumping back into the pool a half an hour later, screaming as loud as before, laughing merrily.

Two hours later Jade and I were left cleaning up her backyard while her dad took home two of James' friends with James. The music was still on and the sun was slowly sinking below the horizon, filling the backyard with a pink-orange glow. I dumped plates into a large black garbage bag while Jade collected cups and restacked her pool chairs.

When I was done I carried the bag around to the curb for trash day tomorrow, I heard a faint splash as I came back around the house and I found Jade in the pool swimming toward the shallow end. She pushed her hair back and rung it out as she stepped out of the pool, her white shirt clinging to her body. I couldn't help but stare at her, leaning against the fence with a smirk on my face.

"Wanna swim Vega?"

"No suit, Jade." I replied, she came toward me, stalking like a lioness after her prey, stopping right in front of me, "Jade…" I warned when she slipped her arms around my waist. But I didn't fight back when she picked me up, I only wrapped my arms around her neck and laughed a little when she walked backwards, squealing as we crashed into the water, fully clothed.

I came up for air before she did, wading in the water as Jade bobbed up in front of me, a happy smirk on her face. We locked eyes for what felt like forever. Those blue eyes piercing me motionless. My heart ached with longing, I just wanted to kiss her, to hold her. She splashed water in my face and darted across the pool. I swam after her, slowed down by my jeans. By the time I reached where she was I'd made she'd made it by me and back into the shallows.

I unbuttoned my jeans and struggled out of them before I swam after her, managing to catch her between the shallow and deep end at the dip. I hooked my arms around her and planted me feet, picking her up from the water and crushing her against me, "well you caught me." she whispered, resting her head back on my shoulder, "now what?"

Now what? That was the question, wasn't it? I spun her in my grasp and cupped her cheek with my hand, feeling the warmth of her face melting the coldness of my finger tips. I traced her lips with my thumb, staring into those blue eyes. She didn't move, she wasn't even breathing, neither was I.

I leaned in slowly, my heart beating in my throat, and pressed my lips against hers. Her lips were soft, just like a remembered, and warm, welcoming as they slid across mine. She put her arms around my waist and pulled me into the shallow end until she hit the wall.

The kiss felt familiar and new at the same time. Slow, but nervous. Knowing, but testing. Amazing, warm. She broke the kiss by grabbing my hand that was cupping her cheek. She kissed my palm and rested her cheek against it, breathing slowly. I rested my forehead against hers, "I miss you, Jade." I whisper.

"I miss you, Tori." She murmurs, squeezing my hip lightly. Her eyes are closed and her teeth are chewing on the inside of her lip. I kiss her again with fervor. I need her to know how I feel and I don't know how to say it. She returns the kiss with rigor, tangling her hand in my hair as she traced my bottom lip with her tongue, silently asking. My lips part. Coffee is the first thing I notice, something that's just so unique to Jade. Her nails dig into my scalp and hip. I drag one hand up her back, the other knotting into her dark hair.

When we break apart this time it's only long enough for Jade to get out, dragging me behind her. With some smart thinking on my part I fish my jeans out of the pool before she pulls me into her bathroom, pushing me up against the door to close it, my head banged against it, but her lips were on mine before I could protest, her nails raking up under my shirt and shoving it upward, leaving burning trails up my flat stomach.

I don't know what we would have done. Would we have stopped on our own? Would we have done something there in her bathroom? I couldn't say for sure, but the front door opening had us jumping apart. My chest heaved as I tried to catch my breath, my heart hammered against my sternum and I just stared at Jade.

"I'll get you something to wear while you shower." She murmurs, heading for the door. I step out of her way and she leaves, closing the door behind her. I start the shower, my hands shaking slightly, probably from being cold, and pull my shirt off over my head, letting it fall down onto my jeans.

I unhook my bra and peel of the soaked underwear, tossing them into the pile as well before I start her shower and step inside. Nothing much has changed in here, Jade still has three different sets of shampoo and conditioner and two different bottles of body wash. I use the green bottle of shampoo that smells like mangos and the pink body wash that smells like strawberries. When I step out I find that Jade has left me some clothes on the counter and mine are missing.

I snag an extra towel from the closet behind the door and try of my skin before flipping my hair upside down and wrapping it up. I pull on the underwear and the shorts and hook on the bra, and realize that these are my clothes, I didn't remember leaving any behind, but when I grab the shirt I find that it's mine as well. I must've had some clothes in the laundry room or something.

When I step out of the bathroom, toweling the ends of my hair I see James coming up the stairs, "Jade told me to tell you she's showering downstairs and to wait in her room if you want. But can you come watch a movie with me for a little bit? Jade wont watch them with me anymore."

"Sure." I shrug, following him down to the movie room with my towel. He sits down on his soccer ball bean bag and I take the football. He's started the second Pirates of the Caribbean movie. His eyes are glued to the screen, completely engrossed in the movie, and he doesn't hear the door open.

Jade looks shocked to see me, but in a good way, she smiles and pulls over a third beanbag chair and sits down next to me to watch the movie. I feels like old times, being back in here with them. We'd have movie nights sometimes. But this is where Jade and I started.

My dad had punched me in the face and I left, going to the only person I thought wouldn't ask me questions or really care. She let me in, gave me clothes, let me shower and didn't ask anything. We talked in an evasive way that told me she knew what happened and alluded the same had happened to her. Then we came in here, got out her vodka and watched Burlesque.

James soon falls asleep, I shut everything off and Jade carries him down to his room. When she comes back out I'm standing by the stairs, "can we go visit my family?" I ask her. She looks at me strange, raising her eyebrow stud at me, "the pink one, with a nice mom and dad."

She smiles softly and nods. We stop at the door to get shoes, I borrow a pair of flip flops, and we walk down the road, up the hill, down the hill and over to the bench swing. We sit down, she pulls her legs up and I use the toe of my shoe to push us slowly back and fourth.

"Have you heard from your mom?" she asks me in a soft tone, like she's scared she'll chase me off.

"No. My manager's assistant who sorts my mail says that's the only letter he's gotten from her but he'll be sure to tell me when he gets another." I look down at the dirt, "what about you? You heard from the terror?"

"Thankfully, no. She's probably long gone by now, which I couldn't be happier about." Jade tells me, looking up to the sky. We sit in comfortable silence, but I stare at that pink house and think about the waitress and the construction man and Hillary off in college.

Eventually we both get up and start walking back to her house, "by the way, I may have destroyed your phone." Jade threw out casually, "It didn't occur to me it was in your pocket."

"It's okay. I can go get a new one after school or something." I reply, "by the way, where are my clothes?"

"Washing machine, I'll bring them to you tomorrow if you want." We stop at my car and she shuffles on her feet, "I guess I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Yeah, if not just put them in my locker, I'll find them." I tell her, walking up to the door of my car. She nods and smiles at me, her eyes locking with mine, and then flicking to my lips. She turns and marches up to her door, "bye Jade!"

"Seeya Vega." She calls back, pushing open the door. I unlock my car door, scan the backseat out of habit and slip into the driver's seat. I start the car as soon as I'm inside and put it in reverse. My mind is in another place on the way back to my apartment, it's a wonder I even made it, but I did and I crawled into bed right after I locked the front door. I was asleep in about ten minutes.

"Tori! Wake up!" I jump, bouncing back against my bed. I glare in the direction of my door where Harmony is hovering in the doorway, "Tori! You're going to be late for school! Get up you idiot!"

I rolled out of my bed in a hurry, grabbing my alarm clock to confirm the time, 6:45. I ran to my closet and dragged off my shorts, dragged on a pair of jeans, changed my shirt and ran a brush through my hair while I hopped into the kitchen. I put some bread in the toaster, tossed the brush aside and found some Starbucks coffee bottles. I snagged one grabbed the toast and grabbed a disposable toothbrush.

I was half way to school when I finished my breakfast; I quickly brushed my teeth and added the brush to my pile of garbage as I pulled into the parking lot at 6:55. I grabbed my trash, my bag, and rushed inside, heading straight to Sikowitz's class and dumping my trash into the can by the door before I sat down.

"Took you long enough to get here." Jade taunted. She was sitting in the chair behind me, Beck laughed when she said it, and Cat giggled.

"Well if someone hadn't destroyed my cell phone yesterday maybe I wouldn't have been late." I throw back, a smirk on my face.

"Maybe if you hadn't been mentally undressing me I wouldn't have felt the need to toss you in the pool." I roll my eyes at her and don't retort, but Beck and Cat are looking at me suspiciously, I turn my eyes to my hands in my lap, biting the inside of my cheek to keep from smiling.

Sikowitz bursts in through his back door, "Is this a dagger which I see before me,

The handle toward my hand? Come, let me clutch thee!

I have thee not, and yet I see thee still.

Art thou not, fatal vision, sensible

To feeling as to sight? or art thou but

A dagger of the mind, a false creation

Proceeding from the heat-oppressèd brain?

I see thee yet, in form as palpable

As this which now I draw.

Thou marshall'st me the way that I was going,

And such an instrument I was to use.

Mine eyes are made the fools o' th' other senses,

Or else worth all the rest. I see thee still,

And on thy blade and dudgeon gouts of blood,

Which was not so before. There's no such thing.

It is the bloody business which informs

Thus to mine eyes. Now o'er the one half-world

Nature seems dead, and wicked dreams abuse

The curtained sleep. Witchcraft celebrates

Pale Hecate's offerings; and withered murder,

Alarumed by his sentinel, the wolf,

Whose howl 's his watch, thus with his stealthy pace,

With Tarquin's ravishing strides, towards his design

Moves like a ghost. Thou sure and firm-set earth,

Hear not my steps which way they walk, for fear

Thy very stones prate of my whereabout

And take the present horror from the time,

Which now suits with it. Whiles I threat, he lives;

Words to the heat of deeds too cold breath gives.

I go, and it is done. The bell invites me.

Hear it not, Duncan, for it is a knell

That summons thee to heaven, or to hell!"

"Okay Macbeth, calm down." Jade says flatly behind me, a few people laugh at her, Sikowitz ignores her.

"Monologues!" he says clasping his hands in front of him, "today I will give you each a monologue, you will have 15 minutes before you will perform them." He walks around and tosses papers at us, our names are scrawled on top of them. I got the monologue from a Cinderella Story, Hilary Duff's version.

I glanced over it and set it back in my lap, missing my phone so much. I kept reaching for it, knowing my manager was probably freaking out, I turned around in my chair, Jade was on her phone, "Jade."

"What do you want Vega?" she asks, not looking up from her phone.

"Can I borrow that to text my manager?"

"Sure." She closes whatever she was doing and opens a new message and hands me the phone. I type in my managers number and use my nickname so he believes its me, tell him I lost my phone. A few minutes later Jade hands it back.

Got you a new phone, I'll drop it by your place, go straight home after school. No studio. –Northman.

"Thanks, Jade." I hand her the phone back after I reply to his message. She shrugs before turning back to her cell phone, Sikowitz stands up, knocking his chair back onto the floor so loud it scared everyone-except for Beck.

"Tori!" I blink up at him, "you're up! Attention forward!"

I stand up, setting the monologue in my chair. Sikowitz sat in the back with some paper and waited. I step onto the stage and close my eyes, letting out a deep breath, when I open my eyes I lock them with Jade, because who else can I look at and feel the same way I need too, "No, you listen! You turned out to be exactly who I thought you were. I never pretended to be somebody else. It's been me all along. And it was me who was hurt in front of everybody. Look, I didn't come here to yell at you, okay? I know what it feels like to be afraid to show who you are. I was. But not anymore. And the thing is, I don't care what people think about me... because I believe in myself. And I know that things are gonna be okay. But even though I have no family, and no job, and no money for college... it's you that I feel sorry for." I pause, "I know that guy that sent those emails is somewhere inside of you, but, I can't wait for him... because waiting for you is like waiting for rain in this drought. Useless and disappointing." She looks agitated, and I can't say why. I smile at her, to let her know that I just needed someone to look at. She makes a weird face that makes me smile and looks away.

"Let Tori be your example, children, she did an excellent job. Beck, go." I hop down the stairs of the stage and retake my seat, crossing my legs at the knees. Beck goes up and rolls his shoulders a bit, hooking his thumbs into the loops of his jeans. He closes his eyes for a moment and then opens them again with a crazy smile.

"Heehoo! Havin' trouble with the livin'? You tired of havin' your home space violated? Wanna get rid of them pesky livin critters once and for all? Well come on down and see me folks, I'm the afterlife's leading bio-exorcist. Yes siree! So come on down, and I'll tell ya, I'll do anything. I'll scare 'em real bad. Hell, I'll even possess myself!" he falls to the ground, "Ow!" then he gets back up, "I got demons runnin' all through me, all through me, come on down and see it. And if you act now, you get a free demon possession with every exorcism, now you can't beat that can ya? Hell, bring the little pards down here. We got plenty of snakes and lizards for them to play with. There's no problem with that at all. So, say it once, say it twice, three times' a charm, and remember…" he starts doing a weird dance, "I'll eat anything you want me to eat and I'll swallow anything you want me to swallow." He stops dancing, "So come down I'll…chew on a dog." He howls and then closes his eyes.

"Very good Beck." Sikowitz says, I hear Jade mumbled behind me "Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse."

"I'm the ghost with the most, babe." I whisper under my breath, she laughs and then covers it up with a cough.

"Jade, thank you for volunteering!" she scowls, but pockets her phone and stands up anyways, the monologue on the floor in a ball. I half wonder if she's even read it or not. But she probably has.

She only closed her eyes for a minute and found someone to focus on, those blue eyes had me frozen in my seat, "You know when I said I knew little about love? That wasn't true. I know a lot about love. I've seen it, centuries and centuries of it, and it was the only thing that made watching your world bearable. All those wars. Pain, lies, hate... It made me want to turn away and never look down again. But when I see the way that mankind loves... You could search to the furthest reaches of the universe and never find anything more beautiful. So yes, I know that love is unconditional. But I also know that it can be unpredictable, unexpected, uncontrollable, unbearable and strangely easy to mistake for loathing, and... What I'm trying to say, Tristan is... I think I love you. Is this love, Tristan? I never imagined I'd know it for myself. My heart... It feels like my chest can barely contain it. Like it's trying to escape because it doesn't belong to me any more. It belongs to you. And if you wanted it, I'd wish for nothing in exchange - no gifts. No goods. No demonstrations of devotion. Nothing but knowing you loved me too. Just your heart, in exchange for mine." She doesn't smile after hers. She just stares at me and then away and walks to her seat.

Cat is up next, she bounces on stage happily and scraps her fingers through her hair before dragging a chair over and sitting down. Crossing one leg and focusing on Sikowitz, "Rehabilitated? Well, now, let me see. You know, I don't have any idea what that means. I know what you think it means, sonny. To me, it's just a made up word. A politician's word, sonny. Young fellas like yourself can wear a suit and a tie and have a job. What do you really want to know? Am I sorry for what I did? There's not a day goes by I don't feel regret. Not because I'm in here. Because you think I should. I look back on the way I was then. A young, stupid kid who committed that terrible crime. I want to talk to him. I want to try to talk some sense to him. Tell him the way things are. But I can't. That kid's long gone and this old man's all that's left. I got to live with that. Rehabilitated? That's just a bullshit word. So you go on and stamp your form, sonny, and stop wasting my time. Because, to tell you the truth, I don't give a shit."

"Very good, Cat." She smiles and laughs and retakes her seat, "Andre and Robbie are absent..." the randomers went next, and Sikowitz just sat there and frowned, "okay. Tori, back on stage."

"Aye, aye, captain." I stood up and made my way on stage.

"Jade, Beck, you too." They give him a strange look but join me on the stage, "okay, I'm going to shout out a movie, you have to come up with a line, someone else needs to come up with a line that matches that. First line, two points, second line one point. After two of you get the lines, I give a new movie."

"Okay." Beck shrugs his shoulders and so does Jade.

"Girl, Interrupted!"

"You know, there's too many buttons in the world. There's too many buttons and they're just- There's way too many just begging to be pressed, they're just begging to be pressed, you know? They're just - they're just begging to be pressed, and it makes me wonder, it really makes me fucking wonder, why doesn't anyone ever press mine? Why am I so neglected? Why doesn't anyone reach in and rip out the truth and tell me that I'm a fucking whore, or that my parents wish I were dead." I recite the line.

"Because you're already dead, Lisa!" Jade calls out.

"Jade and Tori with a point. The Breakfast Club!"

"Don't mess with the bull young man, you get the horns." Jade smirks.

"Fuck you." I retort.

"Jade and Tori. Beck you're slacking. Shawshank Redemption."

"I don't read so good." Beck says quickly.

"Well, you don't read so well. Uh, we'll get to that." I finish up, Sikowitz smirks and writes something down.

"Burlesque."

"I don't get why everyone's having a conniption over her, she's just a tacky farm girl from Iowa." Jade smirks looking at me with this strange emotion in her eyes that I don't know.

"And we know a cow when we see one." I smile back at her as I repeat the words, a small fluttering in my stomach. The bell rang before anymore movies could come up and Sikowitz dismissed us. I grabbed my bag and followed Cat out.

"Vega!" Jade called, grabbing my arm and dragging me to slow down next to her, "Figured we could walk to class together." She adjusts her Gears of War bag on her shoulders and matches pace with me perfectly.

We take pianos side by side and she helps me with the song we were learning. After school I went to my car as promised. When I got back to my apartment my manager was waiting for me. The tall blonde with huge shoulders and a winning smile was hunched over my coffee table filling out a crossword.

"I have a regular table, you know." I tell him, shutting the door behind me. He shrugs one shoulder and scribbles in a word before setting the pencil down, "so what was so urgent I needed to come home after school?" I grab a soda from the kitchen and wander back into the living room.

"It's about your family. Your father has been arrested and your sister and mom are in the hospital." The can crashed to the floor at my feet and exploded, but I hardly heard it over the roar of my heart in my ears, my stomach felt like it had dropped out my butt and the room spun in front of me.