Constant Craving

by Gem.del.mar

As the son of a devout pastor, Carlisle was brought up to believe who he is and what he truly craves is a horrendous sin. When a sexy southern gentleman walks into his emergency department, will he continue to keep his true self hidden or will he finally be given a reason to give into to his constant cravings? Carlisle/Jasper. AU/OOC/AH. CPOV.

7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, dialogue, quotes, et cetera related to the Twilight Saga are the property of Stephenie Meyer and or the property of their respective owners. Play on lyrics of Constant Craving belongs to K.D. Lang and Ben Mink. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended. The original plot is the property of the author. Also this is my fictional version of Forks to help suit the story better and has no reflection on the real town of Forks, Washington whatsoever.

A/N: A tremendous amount of gratitude to my lovely beta the very talented abbymickey24; if you enjoy non-canon please check out her stories, she's fabulous. A very special thank you to Nic for starting my love of slash, I miss you my dear friend. Also a heartfelt thank you and much flove to my sisters/cheerleaders/partners in crime: Misty, Brandi and Cricket for all their help and encouragement along the way.

A/n2: Just a friendly reminder; this story takes place back in 2014, thank you.

~o0o~

Dedicated to Brad Wade; gone, but never forgotten.

~o0o~

~Chapter 7~ One Step Closer to You ~ Carlisle's point of view...

I drowsily feel my shoulder being shaken.

"Come on, doc, hate to do this to you as I heard you had a rough night, but you gotta get up. We have a patient waiting in curtain one that's in desperate need of your wonderful bedside manner." comes Bella's saccharine voice.

I squint, blink my eyes a few times and slowly sit up, swinging my legs over the uncomfortable twin-sized bed. I stretch and groan loudly at my stiff, protesting joints and muscles; I'm really starting to get too old for this.

Bella gives me a sympathetic look and hands me a small cup of steamy coffee.

"Thanks, sweetheart, you're the best." I mumble groggily.

"You're welcome, doc." she returns with a smile.

I take a few sips of the hot ambrosial liquid, savoring the creamy caramel flavor. When I finally get my eyes to focus better, I notice she's wearing a psychedelic looking Scooby-Doo scrub top this morning. I grin and lightly chortle at her choice of attire as the words 'far out' and 'that's groovy, mon' come to mind.

Bella gives me an affectionate grin as I reach over to the bedside table, grabbing my stethoscope and draping it across the back of my neck. I stand up as Bella quickly holds up my lab coat and helps me to slide it on, and then out the on-call door we go.

Shortly before we get to the nurses' station, Alice's snobbish voice reaches us. "They were in the on-call room together this morning. I swear, Katie, I heard him moaning. I bet she was giving him a blow job, it's just disgusting, and we're at work you know..." Alice prattles at Katie as she scans a chart seemingly paying no attention to her.

I hear Bella sniffle a sarcastic sounding snort over Alice's absurd gossip. Bella playfully waggles her eyebrows, sensually licks her lips and winks. "Hope it was as good for you as it was for me, doc." she whispers jestingly.

Between the two of them I can't help but grin and shake my head at the ridiculousness of it all. If the gossiping little scandalmonger only knew whose lips I really had wrapped around my cock this morning she'd probably spontaneously combust.

An image of Jasper and his incredibly talented mouth flashes across my mind, causing my cock to twitch and my steps to falter. Bella side-eyes me and I just shake my head nonchalantly, taking another drink of my coffee, knowing this isn't the time or place to allow my mind to conjure up such memories.

By the time we arrive at the nurses' station I finish the last of my coffee and reach out handing the empty cup to Alice as we pass by; she in return gives us a startled wide-eyed, mortifying expression. The whole thing is so humorous I try my best not to laugh out loud at her.

Thankfully, I'm finally feeling more awake as we step around the curtain. There sitting upon the gurney is an older looking teenaged girl, with a terrified expression and tear stained cheeks. She's slouched over and clutching at her lower abdomen. The sight of the poor girl causes my heart to twinge and all I want to do is make it better.

"Hello, I'm Doctor Cullen and I'll be your physician this morning." I introduce myself soothingly, giving her a warm smile. I take her chart from Bella and start reading over her vitals and symptoms.

Lorraine Huautah, nineteen years-old. Took a home pregnancy test a week ago and came up positive. Six weeks since her last normal menstrual period. After getting up this morning she became dizzy and collapsed; upon waking up she noticed she had some vaginal bleeding and abdominal pain. Her vitals are elevated, but nothing too alarming.

I start off asking Lorraine several questions and do my best to comfort her. Bella helps Lorraine get situated on the gurney, and then holds her hand as we start the examination. I then calmly explain everything I'm doing step by step while I exam her and try to ease her panic the best I can.

After Lorraine's examination, I'm able to rule out she not miscarrying; she gives me a watery smile and is relieved by the news. However, I'm still troubled when she seems to be presenting some symptoms of an ectopic pregnancy. I'm hoping the test results will prove otherwise and it will turn out to be nothing more than a urinary tract infection and possibly some implantation bleeding.

I explain the upcoming lab work and ultrasound to the young woman and I sign off on Miss Huautah's lab orders, handing the chart back to Bella and asking her to see that one of the orderlies takes Miss Huautah to Radiology for an ultrasound after she's had her blood work and urinalysis done. After politely excusing myself, I head off to do the rest of my morning rounds and check in with my other patients that have already been admitted. My first stop being my cliff jumper.

~o0o~

By the end of my rounds, Bella catches back up with me and hands over Miss Huautah's chart, "Here you go, doc, all of her lab and ultrasound results are inside. I also found a couple of blueberry muffins and left them on your desk for you, too." she tells me with a warm smile.

"Thank you, sweetheart, I appreciate it. I'll be in my office if you need me." I reply gratefully and return her smile. After a quick hug, I turn and head back down the corridor to go over the results and get a bite to eat.

Knock, knock.

"Come in." I call out while looking over Miss Huautah's test results. I'm pleased to see the Radiologist ruled out the ectopic pregnancy; however, they still found the placement of the fetus to be problematic resulting in the vaginal bleeding. It looks to be a high-risk pregnancy, but even under the circumstances with care and proper bed rest I believe she can carry the baby to full term. I flip up the next page and scan over the labs and find that she does indeed have both a urinary tract and kidney infection.

I hear the click of the door opening and look up, and find my devil in a crisp dark teal button-up oxford shirt with a charcoal pinstriped vest, snug dark wash jeans, dark cowboy boots, and looking as sinful as ever.

I then notice he's awkwardly trying to close my office door while holding a coffee mug, a Styrofoam cup, and a chart. He finally gives up and just kicks the door shut with his boot. I find the scene amusing and smile.

"Good morning, darlin', do you have a moment to go over the Caleb Hewes case?" he asks, looking a bit agog.

"Sure. Have a seat." I say pointing to one of the leather chairs in front of my desk.

"Did ya sleep well?" Jasper asks with a rakish grin as he steps up to my desk.

"Like the dead until Bella woke me up." I reply and have to fight off this weird butterfly feeling he's provoking deep inside of me as images of him kneeling before me; his mouth doing such wickedly delightful things...

"So... How's the kid doing this morning?" he inquires handing me the Styrofoam cup full of coffee.

"Thank you." I smile graciously. Taking a sip, I'm surprised to find it the way I like it, right down to the caramel macchiato creamer; and I ponder how he knew.

"Yer welcome, darlin'," he says as he takes a seat, and puts the chart on the empty chair next to him.

I clear my throat, "He's in pretty rough shape, still unconscious but stable for now. The next twenty-four-hours will tell for sure." Shifting the Hewes's chart out from under Miss Huautah's, I flip it open to the toxicology report for Caleb. "His tox screen results are negative for drug use; however, he had a blood alcohol content level of point-twenty-two, making him legally intoxicated. With his body weight he was on the verge of having alcohol poisoning. I've spoken to his parents and they're wholly distraught, they swore Caleb has never done anything like this before to their knowledge."

"Jeezus, that's high." Jasper shakes his head. "Well that seems to match up from what I gathered from his older brother and friends when they were in the waiting room. They had a bonfire last night down by First Beach then got to drinkin'; some even making games outta it. They did some night surfin' while a few of the others guys were cliff jumping from around ten feet they think. The older brother said Caleb was just tryin' to show off to impress some girl he likes and out jump one of the other guys that was flirting with her too.

"They said they'd tried to talk Caleb out of it, that he was too high up. They figured he was around a hundred feet or better when he finally jumped and afterwards he hit the water all wonky. Luckily a few older teenagers were already nearby and were able to pull him out using a surfboard. They then dragged him up onto the beach where they quickly realized he was unconscious. Thankfully one of them had enough sense to call nine-one-one for help.

Jasper pauses and seems to be contemplating something. "What the hell I don't get is how Caleb managed to climb that high up a cliff in his excessively intoxicated condition? He had to of been stumblin' and staggerin' all over the damn place." he ponders, looking rather perplexed.

"It's hard to say for sure. All I know is when they're between the ages of fifteen and twenty-five they're fearless and think they're bulletproof, and then when you add that level of intoxication into the mix it magnifies their stupidity; even more so when a hard-on is involved." I reply slightly facetiously.

Jasper sniggers and grins, "True, though on the other hand I don't remember being that reckless at his age. I mean I had my moments, don't get me wrong, but I s'pose livin' here there's not a whole lot to keep these kids entertained and out of trouble. How the hell did ya survive growin' up here?"

I lightly chuckle, "I was considered a nerd and I never drank. My classmates knew I'd rather have my nose buried in a book or do volunteer work than go to some wild party. My goal was to get out of this town and I wasn't about to risk it by doing something foolish."

"I can see that 'bout you," he drawls, giving me a big lopsided grin to the point of dimpling his cheek. "Still, is it really that boring around here that these kids will go partyin' on a beach in the middle of May on a school night when it's like forty-some degrees outside? How the hell are they not freezing to death out there?"

"It's actually not uncommon. The majority of the kids have been born and raised around here and the cooler weather doesn't really faze them all too much. Besides, I would guess that most of them had heavy wetsuits and warm clothing on. Plus there was a full moon out last night and with it being the last one before the end of the school year probably helped too." I reply and take a sip of my coffee.

"Still it all seems nuts to me. So what's the kid's injuries like? Will I get a chance to meet with him later today?" Jasper inquires.

"I'll be surprise if Caleb regains consciousness today, let alone tomorrow. He sustained multiple injuries, and has a grade three concussion. Several compression fractures, as well as possible spinal injuries; we won't know for sure until the swelling goes down. He also ruptured his spleen and bladder when he fractured his pelvic bone. If he continues to stay stable he'll be airlifted to Seattle for further treatment."

"Why would ya have to move him? I've heard you're an exceptional trauma surgeon. Wouldn't he be fine under yer care here?" he asks, and then raises his coffee mug up to his lips to take a sip.

I notice something written in a black quirky font across his white ceramic mug; taking a closer look I see it says: 'I Can Help You Find Your Marbles'. How ironic when he only ever makes me feel like I'm losing mine, and at the thought I lightly chortle catching Jasper's attention. He gives me a curious look and I just shake my head then go on to answer his question, "I am the only specialized trauma surgeon employed here, however, there's only so much I can do with the limited resources we have available. Caleb will also require extensive physical therapy and we can't provide the level he'll need to heal properly. You'll soon find out it comes with the territory of working in such a small town hospital."

"I can understand that, though, it must get awfully frustrating. Dont'cha ever feel like you're wastin' your talent here, that you'd be better suited back in Seattle?" Jasper inquires thoughtfully.

"It does at times, and when I first arrived here I thought along those same lines. When I last worked in Seattle the majority of the time I worked in the surgical department, here, I work both Surgical and Emergency due to the hospital being severely understaffed. However, since I've been here I've also been able to save countless lives that would have otherwise been lost and I'd have to say I don't miss the thirty-six-hour shifts at all." I reply sincerely.

Two quick raps and my office door swiftly opens, "Hey, doc, what did you find out about Lorraine she's on the verge of losing it out here?" Bella asks as she hastily steps in my office, her eyes widen and she gets a goofy grin when she sees Jasper. "Oh. Oops, sorry. Didn't realize you were... busy."

"I'll be there in a moment." I tell her and point back at my door.

"Sure. I'll meet you outside curtain one." she replies impishly, giving a playful wave to Jasper.

Jasper watches us with an amused expression and lightly chuckles.

Bella waves again and flounces back out the door as fast as when she first appeared.

"Well since it doesn't look like Caleb will be conscious anytime soon, and I really doubt it was a possible suicide attempt, just a bout of utter foolishness, I best be lettin' ya get back to yer work." Jasper says with a slight smile.

"Yes, I suppose. I should get back to my patient I've already kept her waiting too long." I agree morosely, hating to end my time with him.

Jasper stands up and leans over my desk, grabbing onto each side of the stethoscope draped around my neck and pulls me closer towards him. He gazes longingly into my eyes, and then presses his lips to mine in a long slow savoring kiss. I wish time could stand still and this moment didn't have to end.

Once we're both breathless, he straightens back up giving me a licentious look while his tongue swipes across his bottom lip.

"Have a good day, darlin'. I look forward to seeing a lot more of you soon."

~o0o~

The next several days are beyond hectic around here. Regardless of Jasper's parting words, I haven't crossed paths with him since he visited my office; and for once I'm not actively avoiding him; in fact, I'm actively trying to see him because I'm finally past denying myself what I truly want: Jasper.

It may be selfish of me to do, but I'm finally taking what Bella's been trying to beat into my head to heart. She's been right from the beginning, it's time I put myself first for once; my wants, needs and desires, instead of everyone else's and that includes my father's. I'm also hoping she's right about Jasper being understanding and discreet, too. So, I'm going against that nagging voice in the back of my head that sounds a lot like my father, and I've decided that Jasper and I truly deserve the chance to get to know each other better; to see if what we have for one another is real and goes beyond lust.

And once I made up my mind, I came up with an idea. If it all works out, I'm hoping to get to spend some time alone with Jasper for a few days.

First: I pulled a few strings and miraculously got the coming holiday weekend off without being on-call. Second: I needed Bella's help. After talking it over with her, she's all for it and more than willing to assist in anyway. The only downside is afterwards she couldn't keep that damned goofy grin off her face to save her life. Third: and what I rue most, I needed Esme's help too.

Now with everything in place and all the arrangements made, I just need to bring myself to ask Jasper. Here's to hoping he'd be interested, have the time off and hopefully no other plans with this being on such short notice.

~o0o~

It's not until Thursday towards the end of our shift when I'm finally able to find some free time to see him. Standing in front of Jasper's closed office door, I try to gather my courage to bring myself to knock now that the time has finally come.

I knock on the door a few times, hold my breath and try to will my feet to stay in place.

A muffled "Its open." is heard from the other side of the door. I notice the small tremor in my hand as I go to turn the door knob. I slowly push the door open and step inside his office, quickly closing it behind me.

Jasper's face lights up at seeing me, giving me a gorgeous smile. "Hey there, darlin', you're truly a sight for sore eyes. What brings ya to my neck of the woods this afternoon?" he asks as he closes a chart in front of him, twirling his fountain pen between his fingers.

I'm momentarily captivated by his debonair poise as he watches me with an expectant expression; his demeanor doing nothing to settle me. I'm starting to feel like a nervous wreck, and I find myself lost for words now that I'm actually standing in front of him. Will he…

"Carlisle, I won't bite unless ya ask me to." he gives me a devilish smirk. "You have no reason to be nervous around me."

Slightly amused by his teasing remark, I clear my throat and still my nerves.

"I know this is really short notice, but I was wondering if you have plans for Memorial Day weekend?" I inquire apprehensively.

"As a matter-of-fact I don't. Do ya have somethin' in mind?" Jasper answers blithely, looking intrigued as he leans back in his leather chair.

"Yes, I do, although, I need to be up-front with you first." I reply and pause hoping I can get what I need to say worded right; I haven't felt this nervous in ages.

"Okay." he encourages, waving his hand for me to go on.

I take a calming breath then exhale slowly. "I'm not ready to come out, and to be completely honest, I doubt I ever will while my father is still alive. But I would love to spend this weekend with you and get the chance to know you better. I will completely understand if you'd be against this being out yourself. I just ask that you please keep my secret until I'm ready to share it myself."

"Carlisle, I appreciate your honesty and trusting me enough to be straightforward. I believe I've already made my intentions towards you perfectly clear." he states while ogling me. "With that being said I also would love to spend some time with you and get to know you better as well. I haven't really hidden the fact that I'm attracted to you and if that means we need to keep this to ourselves for awhile so be it." Jasper replies sincerely.

"So you'll come?" I ask hesitantly, hoping I didn't misinterpret what he just said.

Jasper snickers lustfully, "Oh, I hope to, darlin'. Seriously though, when it comes to you the answer will always be yes, Carlisle. Wherever you go I'll be more than happy to follow, so whatever you might have planned for this weekend I would love to accompany you. Now that ya' know I'm a sure thing care to tell me where we'll be going?"

My body finally starts to relax as I take in all he said and smile at him graciously, "Thank you, hearing you say all that means a lot. As for this weekend, I've already made plans to go out of town. Have you heard of Clallam Bay, it's about a forty minute drive from here?

"Clallam Bay, I've seen it on the map, but never been. Pray tell, what will we be doing while there?" Jasper inquires curiously.

"I've rented a houseboat for Friday night until Sunday afternoon; they say the weather should be pleasant this weekend. Or if you'd prefer not to be out on the water we can do something else." I explain, feeling marginally nervous again.

"Havta say spending a weekend on a houseboat all alone with ya sounds mighty wonderful." Jasper drawls as his eyes light up.

"I agree, I'm already looking forward to it." I concur with a delighted smile.

"You mentioned yer father earlier, am I to assume he's not fully aware of where you'll be this weekend," Jasper pauses giving me a knowing look, "just so we're on the same page, where does yer father think you'll be?" Jasper requests regardful.

I blow out a breath, hating that I've had to be deceitful, but hoping like hell it will all be worth it in the end.

"My father believes I'll be accompanying Bella to Seattle this weekend for a medical seminar. I've already asked a family friend to check in on him and she agreed." I explain.

Jasper mirthfully chuckles, "How devious of you, and just where will Bella really be?"

"She'll be spending the weekend in Sequim. If it's alright with you, I figured we could meet up outside of Forks over by Sappho where we can then take your car to Clallam Bay and Bella can drive mine on over to Sequim and then we can all meet back up come Sunday afternoon." I propose sanguinely.

"That all sounds very doable. Is there anything specific I should bring?" Jasper inquires and pulls a notebook closer, readying his pen to write.

"Whatever you'd like is fine. There's a little sun deck on top to lounge, but the water will be too cold to go swimming this time of year. I've already asked them to stock the galley so we should have everything we might need food wise. If there's something you would like to have specifically we can swing by the store before we head on over to the marina." I reply.

Jasper stands from his chair and saunters around his desk until he's standing in front of me with a glimmer of adoration in his mocha eyes. He slowly brings his hand up and caresses his fingertips along my jaw and across my lower lip, sending a tingling shiver up my spine.

"As long as you're there I'll have everything I need." Jasper says fervently.

"I'll be there." I promise.

"I can hardly wait." Jasper enthuses and pulls me up flush against him.

A breath of a second later his lips are upon mine in a most impassioned kiss.

~o0o~

A/N: Hope y'all enjoyed the chapter. Carlisle's getting there, a few steps at a time, but he's getting there. The first part of their trip away is coming up next, due to its length I had to break it up into two parts. Thank you all for your wonderful reviews, favs and follows, they all mean more to me then mere words can express and I truly appreciate them all. Until next Friday, hope y'all have a great week.