So, apparently, my lovely British cousins across the sea don't hold baby showers. You're missing out on free food and free baby crap, ya'll. ;) If you don't like the idea of a shower (since it's not "authentic"), just think of it as a social gathering wherein the guests give the pregnant woman gifts, lol.

"Where are they?" Lily rolled her eyes in exasperation as her husband placed a tray of finger foods on the table in the Potters' sitting room. She placed a hand on her obviously pregnant belly and looked pointedly at Remus.

He raised an eyebrow. "How should I know?"

Lily stared him down. "I know there's something going on between you and Melanie, Remus," she said bluntly. "You've both been acting strangely for months. I don't care- Sirius treats her like shit- but I figure you know where she is, at least most of the time."

Remus narrowed his eyes at his best friend's wife. "There is nothing between Melly and me," he insisted.

"Ha! I call bullshit, Moony," James said over his shoulder as he walked back into the room with more food from the kitchen. "You don't have to act all noble around us; I know you've loved her since sixth year."

"Fourth year," Remus muttered under his breath. Lily raised an eyebrow but otherwise ignored him.

"They better not show up high at my baby shower." Lily's voice carried a tone of warning.

"Good luck with that!" James said, shaking his head. "Honestly, I don't know what possessed her to marry him. I guess love makes people do crazy things."

"She may love him, but he certainly doesn't love her back," Remus interrupted. "And she's beginning to realize that, I think. She's started distancing herself from him."

"What, while she's shagging you?" James teased. When Remus turned red, James looked over at his wife, a question written on his face. He'd only been teasing.

Lily reached across the table and placed a soft hand on Remus'. "Remus, is there something you're not telling us?" she asked quietly. She found it hard to believe that Remus- good, gentle Remus- would interfere in his best friend's marriage like that. Surely there was another explanation for his strange behavior.

Before he could reply, Sirius and Melanie walked into the living room. Remus' face immediately went blank as the couple greeted James and Lily. He watched Melanie with a critical eye, and knew immediately that they were both high again. He sighed. He had to break her of this.

As Sirius greeted James with a bark of laughter and wrapped his arm around the other man's shoulders, Melanie sank onto the couch beside Remus. Lying back, she closed her eyes. "Mmm," she murmured, enjoying the relaxing effects of the heroin. She turned her head and smiled at Remus. "Hello, Remy."

He frowned at her. "What are you doing?" he hissed. "You can't show up high at Lily's baby shower!" The redhead was watching both of them from her seat across the room, trying to decipher their relationship.

Melanie laughed. "Oh, quit being a goody-two-shoes," she admonished.

Remus leaned close to her ear. "You've got to stop this, Melly," he pleaded.

She turned her head, her lips now millimeters from his. "Or what?"

Remus sat back, passing a hand over his face. "Melly, don't-"

"Hey, Moony!" Sirius held his arms out for Remus to stand and give him a brotherly hug. Sirius winked at him. "Having fun?" he asked. He looked Remus' tired form up and down before remarking, "Moons, you need a woman. You look exhausted."

Remus shook his head. "No, Pads, don't."

Sirius collapsed on the couch beside his wife, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. "This little woman does wonders for my energy," he joked. Melanie refused to meet Remus' eyes as he continued, "Hearing a pretty girl cry out your name will cure all your ills, Moony."

Remus looked around at Lily uncomfortably. The redhead now had a pretty good grasp on the situation. She smiled and stood to her feet. "James made cake," she announced. "I hope it's edible," she teased, winking at her husband and reaching out to hold his hand. Remus' stomach twisted with the desire to be able to touch Melanie like that in public, to put his arm around her waist and smell her hair and let every man in the room know she was his- except, she was Sirius'. He growled under his breath in frustration.

James brought a slice of cake out to everyone, which Sirius and Melanie refused. Remus looked away, knowing the drugs made them nauseous and unable to eat. Melanie would often vomit when she came to see him immediately after she had shot up.

An awkward silence ensued as presents were opened and Lily chattered on amiably about the baby she was carrying. It was a boy, she told them, and they were going to name him Harry. Remus wasn't paying her any attention- thinking instead about how he would never have a family of his own.

When James crooked a finger at him, gesturing for Remus to follow him into the kitchen, he sighed and complied. Once they were alone, James turned to face him. "Moony, what's going on?" he asked. He cast a quick glance at the door to be sure they wouldn't be overheard. "You're acting funny."

"No, I'm not."

James shook his head and crossed his arms in a defiant gesture. "You forget that we have ten years of history between us, Remus," he warned softly. "I know you. What are you hiding?"

Remus sighed and looked away. James was right- the other man could always tell when something was bothering him. "It's Melanie," he confessed. "The drugs- I'm starting to worry."

James raised an eyebrow. "And?"

Remus felt a rush of irritation flood his veins as James stared at him expectantly. "It's none of your business," he said shortly.

James reached out and grabbed his arm. "Remus- if you're shagging Melly- you know Sirius will lose it."

"Lose what?" Sirius asked, sauntering into the kitchen. He grinned at his two best friends. "Talking about me behind my back, are we?" he joked.

Remus flushed bright red and brushed past him wordlessly to exit the kitchen. James scowled at his friend. "Good job, Padfoot. We were having a conversation."

"'Bout what?" Sirius asked, polishing an apple he had found in a bowl on the counter. He rubbed it vigorously on his sleeve before inspecting it; deciding it was edible, he took a giant bite. "What's wrong with Moons?" he asked around a mouthful of fruit.

James rolled his eyes. "Just ill, I think," he hedged. "I'm starting to worry about him, though."

Sirius chuckled. "He's spending too much time with Melly, that's what's wrong," he said jovially. When James simply stared at him, he continued, "She's always moping about the baby- I bet she's bringing him down." He shrugged. "Better him than me, I suppose."

James frowned at his best friend. "Doesn't it bother you that your wife has to go to someone else to feel fulfilled?" he asked bluntly.

Sirius shrugged. "Not really. She goes to Remus for emotional support, and I go to other women for a good shag. Works out in the end."

James looked angry. "Why don't you just divorce her, then, if it's that bad?"

Sirius looked shocked. "What? Why? We're fine."

"You just like having someone to shoot up with."

Tossing the apple core into the waste bin, Sirius scowled at James. "That's none of your business," he growled. "Besides, divorce doesn't really exist for purebloods. I'd be shunned more than I already am. You know that."

"I know I'm getting tired of being told nothing is my business," James retorted. "Between you and Remus-"

"What'd Remus say?" Sirius looked interested.

"Nothing," James mumbled. "It's none of my business."

Sirius rolled his eyes and pushed open the door that led into the living room. "Whatever, Prongs."