I can't believe I'm on Chapter seven already. Thanks so much to all of you have made it this far with me :)
Note: I've gone back and edited Chapter 4 and Chapter 5. I rushed editing one of them and the other I wrote while I was very ill the flu so I thought they could do with some cleaning up. All the changes are minor, but Chapter 4 in particular should (hopefully) read a little better now.
Shepard held her breath as Garrus hacked the door. When it slid open, she peered inside the base almost as if she was afraid of what she might see, but all that greeted her was a small entrance hall with four different exits leading off it. It was a perfectly normal looking room. Nothing about it would have given away the awful use the base was put to on a daily basis.
"Ready?" Garrus asked.
Nodding, Shepard stepped inside.
As she did, she noticed that a strange sterile odour was now hanging in the air around her. For some reason the smell made Shepard think of the hospital she'd been brought to after being rescued from Mindoir. While there, she'd spent most of her time sitting on her standard issue bed, staring off into space. She'd hated the damn place and had desperately wished to be somewhere else.
She was getting a similar feeling now. So far she'd only made it about two metres into the base and she didn't feel much desire to go any further yet.
"It looks so normal in here," she said in a quiet voice, almost as if she was thinking out loud rather than talking to Garrus and Kasumi. "You would never know what goes on. This base could be used for anything. It's so quiet and...empty. Where is everyone?"
Garrus drew up to her side, brushing his arm against hers in a way that may or may not have been deliberate. "I don't know, Shepard. I thought they would have sent a welcoming party to greet us straight away. I'm almost disappointed."
Kasumi shook her head. "I wish you hadn't said that, Garrus." She walked over to stand by Shepard's other side while she spoke. "It's never a good idea to tempt fate. We'll probably be over-run with batarians carrying rocket launchers in minute or two thanks to you."
Garrus looked at her incredulously. "Come on Kasumi, don't be so ridiculous. Next you'll be telling me with should all carry good luck charms in our armour."
"Well, it wouldn't do any harm, would it? Maybe I should buy us all a horseshoe the next time we're on the Citadel."
"What the hell is a horseshoe?"
Despite how uneasy she felt, Shepard couldn't help smiling as Kasumi started doing her best to explain to Garrus what exactly a horse was and why you might want to carry one of its shoes around with you. She was so glad they were both here with her for this. Hearing them joke around made it seem like everything was still perfectly fine.
While they continued to talk, Shepard walked a few more paces forward into the room. Unfortunately, almost as soon as she did, she heard the distant sound of feet clattering against the floor.
She pulled her pistol out. "I think we might get that welcome after all, Garrus. You'll have to say I told you so to him later, Kasumi. Right now get into cover. You both know what to do."
A part of her had been dreading the start of the fight because she was afraid it might dredge up her memories again. In the end, it turned out to be far more like business as usual than she'd expected. The batarians were well-trained but the three of them were better. It really didn't matter if she'd once pictured herself living a much simpler kind of life. This was a normal day for her now. She was a soldier and she was going to get through this mission like she'd got through hundreds of others in the past.
After the first battle was over and done with, they continued to make quick progress through the base. It was just a pity that they also became more and more lost the deeper inside the building they reached. Unfortunately, most of the rooms were so bare that they were almost impossible to tell apart.
Eventually Shepard found herself peering down yet another empty passageway with a fork at the bottom. She was beginning to feel like she was trapped in one of those dreams where you walk down endless pathways, never actually reaching the end of the journey.
"Any chance we're going in circles?" she asked, not entirely sure she was joking.
"Given how long we've been wandering about now, I'd say that's fairly likely," Kasumi replied. "We should have left a trail of breadcrumbs behind us."
"I think you've been reading too many fairy tales, Kasumi. Besides, we don't have any bread." Shepard paused. "Garrus, you don't happen to have any idea of where we are, do you?"
"Not really. But I don't think we've been here before. This hallway is straighter than the others. At least I think it is."
"I'll have to take your word on that." She let out a sigh. "Which way do you think it is to the base's control room?"
"Maybe left at the bottom of this passage?"
Shepard could tell it was a guess but she decided to follow his suggestion anyway because he seemed to be the least lost out of the three of them. At this point, Shepard doubted she would be able to retrace the steps they'd already taken. Her lack of any sense of direction was probably one of the many reasons why most of her crew thought she was a terrible driver. They were wrong of course.
"Left it is then," she said and gestured for Garrus and Kasumi to move forward.
She started to follow them but stopped dead when she saw a large blood stain on the floor. It looked like someone had really taken a beating there at some point and no one had ever bothered to clean it up.
Shepard bent down to touch the red smear with her gloved hand and realised it was dried into the floor so deeply that none of it came off onto her fingers. Humans must have been passing through this base for months now, perhaps even years. The thought disgusted her.
She started to raise herself back up to her feet, but before she could walk away a batarian suddenly threw himself out of a side room in front of her. As distracted as she was, she still had the presence of mind to get into cover before he was able to fire.
He shot off a few rounds anyway, sending bullets flying over her head. "You're dead, you murderous bitch." he spat at her, "Did you really think you could kill so many of my men and then get away with walking about on your own? You stupid fucker. I'm going to rip you to pieces when I get my hands on your soft human flesh."
He couldn't see the turian that was standing behind him with his sniper rifle already raised, but Shepard could. She realised that Garrus must have been keeping her covered ever since she'd wandered away from him.
"That's quite a threat," she said calmly, waiting for Garrus to fire, "But I don't think my boyfriend's going to let you act on it."
The batarian started to shout more abuse at her before he was silenced by a series of gunshots.
Shepard strolled out of cover, ignoring the body on the floor. "Thanks. I suppose I could've hit him with some of my biotics but I thought I might as well give you another excuse to show off. I know how much you love doing that."
Garrus had an odd look on his face as she walked towards him.
"What's wrong?" she asked.
"Nothing. You called me your 'boyfriend'." His tone was slightly mocking, but he sounded pleased. "It's not a term turians use much, but I used to hear humans say it a lot when I worked on the Citadel. I know what it means."
"Oh. The word just sort of...slipped out." She really hadn't meant to say it, but then wasn't that what he was to her now? Although a simple label like 'boyfriend' hardly seemed to cover everything he meant to her. "You don't mind, do you? I mean we don't have to label anything. I don't think I even want to do that yet. It's too soon. The last thing I want is to come off like some kind of clingy..."
"Shepard," Garrus said firmly, "Calm the hell down. You can call me whatever you like."
The nervous expression that had been playing across her face faded away. "Thanks Gar-bear."
"Except for that."
She smirked for a moment, but bit back any further retort. She'd save it for later. "Come on, we need to get back to business." She grabbed his arm and pulled him towards Kasumi at the bottom of the corridor. "So let's head left like you suggested."
A couple more scuffles and wrong turns later, they finally found themselves outside of what appeared to be the control room. At the very least, it was a room which had a lot of consoles, flashing lights and wires in it.
They started to head in through the open doorway, but Shepard gestured for Garrus and Kasumi to stop in their tracks. She could hear the faint sound of heavy breathing and someone's desperate attempts to stifle it coming from the back of the room.
"Who's there?" she called out, "Get out here right now. You don't want me to come over there. Trust me."
A single batarian emerged from behind the consoles. He wasn't armoured like the others, wearing a greasy looking jumpsuit instead. He clearly wasn't a threat. Shepard knew it as soon as she saw the terrified look on his face.
She kept her pistol trained on him anyway. "Who exactly are you?"
"A mechanic, I just keep things running smoothly in here." All four of his eyes were focused on her gun. "Please don't kill me."
"You're not very brave for a batarian are you? Shouldn't you be threatening to maim me right now?"
"I...I have a family. Please."
"So do all those prisoners you've got caged up." So did she until she was sixteen. Shepard didn't lower her gun, not yet. "Out of sheer curiosity, exactly how many humans are you hiding here at the moment?"
"About thirty, but we haven't had them for that long. They were taken from a ship that was transporting people between two colonies less than a week ago. Most of them survived the attack. At least I think they did."
Shepard could barely believe what she was hearing. "Oh, well that makes it all okay then."
If it was possible, the batarian started to look even more panicked. "Look this place is just a processing centre. All we do is keep the prisoners here until they can be sold on. That's it. We're part of a bigger chain. If we didn't do this job, then someone else would." Shepard could tell he was about to say more, but then he saw the expression on her face. "You're going to kill me, aren't you?"
"Well I must admit I'm finding the idea of shooting you quite appealing right now." She stared down at the barrel of her gun and then back at his pathetic, contorted face. "Tell you what, if you help me out, I might consider sparing you. What do you say?"
"What do you want?" He spoke as if he couldn't get the words out of his mouth fast enough.
"First, I need those defence towers, which brought down my shuttle and killed two of my men by the way, to be disabled. Then I need whatever little toy you're using to block our comms to be deactivated. Oh, and I want you to transfer every detail about this little slaving ring you're involved in to our omni-tools. Got it?"
He nodded. "Yes. I'll do it all now."
"No," Shepard said. The batarian looked terrified for a second and she knew he thought she'd changed her mind. "You'll show the turian how to do all of it. I don't trust you."
She nodded towards Garrus and he headed over to the batarian. The whole time they worked, Shepard kept her gun pointed at his ugly, four-eyed head.
After a few minutes, Garrus walked back over to her. "It's done, Shepard."
"Good." She gestured for the batarian to come over to her. "Now I just need to decide what to do with you."
"I did what you asked!" He was panicking again.
"Yes, but I can hardly let you wander about the base willy-nilly now can I?"
Shepard looked around her. Wires were hanging from the ceiling, but there was no guarantee he wouldn't be able to wriggle his way out if she tied him up with them. She smiled when she noticed that there was a small cupboard at the back of the room. It would do nicely as an improvised cell.
She grabbed the batarian by the scruff of the neck and hurled him into it. "One last question before I lock you in: where are the prisoners being kept?"
"An underground bunker. Turn left twice after you leave this room and you'll come to it. It's not easy to miss."
"Thank you for your help. I hope you won't be too offended if I say I sincerely hope I never see you again." She locked the door and then leant some of her weight against it. "If it's possible, I think I'm starting to hate batarians even more than I did before."
"At least we can get back in touch with the Normandy now, Shep," Kasumi said, in an obvious attempt to calm her down.
Shepard pushed herself back off the door and stared at the red light that was now shining on it. She hoped she had made the right decision in sparing the batarian. Her parents had always tried to teach her the value of a life so she guessed that they probably would have done the same thing. Of course, unless someone invented a way of communicating with the dead, there was no real way of finding out anymore.
"Shepard, do you want me to contact the Normandy?" Garrus asked.
She shook her head and walked away from the door. "No, no, that's okay. I'll do it." She pressed her comm. "Joker, please for the love of God, tell me you can hear me."
He answered almost straight away. Unlike the day before, the line was free of any interference. "Loud and clear. It's good to hear your voice again, Commander."
"Yeah, well the feelings more than mutual. In fact, I don't think I've ever appreciated what a truly wonderful voice you have before, Joker."
"So I take it that the three of you haven't been having much fun down there?"
"That would depend on your definition of fun. We've spent most of the last day and a half either walking or fighting, and last night we had to sleep in a cave." She paused. "I would very much like to leave now. I'm pretty sure Garrus and Kasumi feel the same way."
"Are the missile towers down?"
"As of five minutes ago. Does that mean you and EDI are brave enough to come get us now?"
She heard some muffled talking on the other side of the line. "Yeah," Joker said eventually, "But I think you might have hurt EDI's feelings with that last comment."
"Tell her I'm sorry. It's just been very a long mission." She ran a hand through her hair. "I also need you to make contact with the Alliance for me. The batarians running this base were slavers and they've been holding some humans captive. About thirty people will need to be evacuated from this planet once we're finished here." She hesitated. "And one batarian prisoner. He's locked in a cupboard off the main control room at the moment."
"I'm on it, Commander. ETA twenty minutes."
"I can barely wait, Joker. See you then. Shepard out."
After deactivating her comm., Shepard paused for a moment to let the fact that this nightmare was almost over sink slowly in. She turned to Garrus and Kasumi. "In a few more hours, we'll all be back on the Normandy, thousands of miles away from this rock. I can't wait. I'm even starting to miss the taste of Gardner's food."
The three of them made sure every last batarian had been removed from the base before finally heading into the darkness of the bunker. With Garrus' help, Shepard shifted the heavy hatch covering it open and then clambered down the stairs.
The room she found herself in at the bottom was much duller than the rest of the base. The few overhead lights that the batarians had bothered to install flickered on and off periodically and there were no windows. Despite this, however, Shepard could still make out the lines of cells running down the walls. About half of them were full.
Shepard hadn't given much thought to what the prisoners would look like, but now they were in front of her she was shocked. She'd presumed that she would be rescuing a group of adults, but there were teenagers and children behind the bars as well. She guessed the youngest was about seven.
No matter how old they were, most of the survivors were wearing clothes that seemed to be at least one size too big for them. It made Shepard's stomach lurch when she realised that the batarians mustn't have been feeding them properly. More than a few were also injured. In the gloom, Shepard could see a man with a head wound and a blond woman cradling what looked like a broken arm.
There was one young girl in particular who Shepard couldn't seem to stop glancing at again and again. She looked about sixteen and was wearing a torn dress. Even though she had different skin colour to Shepard, and was shorter and rounder than she had been at that age, she still felt like she was staring at herself after the raid on Mindoir. A lump began to form in her throat and she swallowed to try to rid herself of it.
"Garrus, Kasumi...could you open the cells for me."
As they both followed her orders, the sounds of a ship moving overhead rocked the base. Shepard was a little afraid she might have imagined the noise until Joker's voice came over her comm and told her that the Normandy had landed half a mile from their current position. She had to stop herself from crying out in relief.
By the time she'd finished talking to the pilot, Shepard realised that the cells were already open and both Garrus and Kasumi were standing by waiting for her next move.
Shepard forced herself to walk to the centre of the room. She knew that she had to say something to reassure the newly freed prisoners, she just didn't know what. With the bad state they were in, they would hardly want to hear a long winded speech about how she'd come to rescue them and it was all going to be alright now.
"I'm Commander Shepard of the Normandy," she announced in the end, "I'm a spectre and I'm here to get you all off this planet." She thought it was best to keep things very simple.
There wasn't much of a reaction to what she'd just said other than a few murmurs of what could have been surprise, but then Shepard hadn't really expected more than that. She turned to Kasumi. "Could you lead the group out into the hallway? I'll join you in a moment."
Shepard stared at the cells while they emptied. She couldn't seem to move or speak anymore. When all the prisoners were gone, Garrus came up behind her and put a hand on her shoulder.
"I'm alright," she ground out eventually, "I just needed a moment to...centre myself."
"Those humans will be okay now." Shepard didn't answer him, she wasn't sure if she believed him this time. He paused for a moment and then turned her round to face him. "Are you still going to leave that batarian in the control room to the Alliance? You didn't have to spare him. Most people wouldn't have."
"I know that, Garrus."
"But you haven't changed your mind now, after seeing all of this?"
"No. The Alliance are welcome to him. He's not worth the weight on my conscience. And anyway killing him won't bring my family back. Nothing will. I know you might not agree, but I made my decision already. If you want to talk about it later then fine, we can talk about all night long, not now though."
"I didn't say I disagreed. I just...I don't know. I hate seeing you upset like this."
Garrus stood looking at her silently for a minute and then seemed to come to some sort of decision. He bent down and pulled her up in into his arms so that her feet were dangling a foot off the floor. Shepard made a muffled noise of surprise, but she hugged him back, burying her face against his cowl and wrapping her legs and arms around him. She could feel the heat of his body warming her even though they were separated by two layers of armour. As he simply held her, Shepard's breathing and heart rate gradually returned back to normal. She knew this was where she belonged now.
Garrus ran his talons through her hair. "Don't worry I'm not going to make a habit of manhandling you in the middle of missions. You just looked like you needed a hug."
"I did," she murmured against his neck, "Thank you."
"I'm sorry if what I said made you feel worse."
"No, it didn't. It's just this place. I hate being here."
"Then let's go." He lowered Shepard back down onto her own two feet again. A part of her wanted to stay in his arms forever and never let go of him. It was an utterly stupid impulse, but she felt it anyway.
She tried to comfort herself with the thought that once they were back on the Normandy, they would finally be able to spend some proper time alone together. If they decided to take things slow, then they could just talk or sit in her cabin watching vids for hours. If they didn't, well, there certain advantages to having your own private quarters.
Shepard let Garrus lead her out of the room to join Kasumi and the rescued prisoners in the corridor. They were still being so quiet. It was almost as if they couldn't believe they'd got their freedom back. But they had. Shepard was going to make sure of that.
Ten minutes later, they were all standing outside the base. As she looked around her, Shepard's heart soared. The Normandy was sitting just a few hundred metres in front of her in the middle of the valley, gleaming in the sunlight. She had never been so happy to see her own ship before.
She wanted to run to it, but the rescued prisoners were still in her care so she couldn't. None of them seemed to be very steady on their feet yet so she had to lead them very slowly towards the Normandy.
Once they were much closer to the ship, she found them a safe, sheltered spot where they could wait under the watchful eye of some of the Normandy crew for the arrival of the Alliance vessel. As she went to move away, one of the oldest men grabbed her arm and thanked her. Shepard stared down at him unable to speak for a few seconds, before she finally choked out, "I'm just glad I could help."
She'd never thought to thank her own rescuers on Mindoir. The shock of what had just happened to her had been so great, however, that she probably wouldn't have been able to speak a single word to them if she'd tried. But this man had made sure to let Shepard know how grateful he was. By the time he let go of her arm again, she had tears in her eyes.
She knew she was on the verge of losing it completely now, but she decided to turn towards all of the survivors one last time. She wanted to say something meaningful to them. In the end, though, the only words she was able to draw out of her mouth were "good luck". When it came down to it, she couldn't think of anything else to say.
Shepard had to wipe her eyes dry before she felt able to start walking the rest of the way towards the Normandy. She gestured for Garrus and Kasumi to follow behind her. She still hated the thought of anyone seeing her cry.
When she drew up to the ship, she saw that Miranda was waiting outside to speak with her. Shepard got the impression that she had been standing there for some time.
The former Cerberus officer greeted Shepard with a stiff nod, but she couldn't entirely hide how pleased she was to see the shore party returning from their mission intact. "Welcome back, Commander," she said, "I must admit I was quite concerned when you didn't make contact last night. The Normandy seemed so...empty without the three of you."
"We're all glad to see you too, Miranda," Shepard replied.
A smile flitted across Miranda's face. "Yes, well, the whole crew was starting to worry. The ship isn't the same when you're not there, Shepard. I have to admit that even I missed seeing you strolling through the corridors." She cleared her throat and put on her let's-get-down-to-business voice. "However, we can't stand here exchanging pleasantries all day. Would you like me to give you an update on the current situation, Commander?"
"Go right ahead."
"As you wish, Commander," Miranda said, "Joker has already made contact with the Alliance and they've agreed to send a ship to conduct an evac operation. Its expected time of arrival is four hours from now, five at most. I've personally dispatched a salvage team to repair the shuttle and return it to the Normandy. They've been instructed to recover the two bodies as well."
Shepard was impressed. "Sounds like you've got everything under control."
She knew Miranda was a perfectionist by nature, but, honestly, she hadn't expected her XO to be able to handle things quite as well as she had done. By her own admission, Miranda wasn't exactly a people person. But the Normandy was still intact and it appeared that not even Jack had tried to stage a rebellion under her command.
"I try my best, Commander," Miranda said, a little bit of pride creeping into her voice. "And I can continue to monitor the situation from this point onwards. The three of you should report to Dr Chakwas for a medical examination as soon as possible. I'll keep you regularly updated."
Shepard nodded. "Thanks, Miranda. You can stay in charge of things like you suggested, but I think I'll wait out here until the Alliance ship arrives. I'll visit the good doctor later."
"What?" Garrus exclaimed from where he'd been standing behind her. "You need to go to Chakwas now; you spent half of yesterday hobbling around."
Shepard shot him a cold look. "I just want to make sure the prisoners get off this planet safely. I'm waiting right here until they leave."
Out of the corner of her eye, Shepard could see Miranda glancing between her and Garrus with a bemused expression on her face. "I'll leave the two of you to discuss this," she said in the end. "I have work I need to tend to anyway." She started to walk away.
"Miranda," Shepard called after her and she turned back. "Thank you, for everything. You've really outdone yourself this time."
Miranda allowed herself to smile properly this time. "I tried to follow your example, Shepard." Her tone was as level as always, but receiving a complement like that from Miranda was like receiving a bear hug from anyone else. Before Shepard could react, however, she was already striding off again, her long hair bouncing off her shoulders with every step.
Shepard watched Miranda go, before looking towards Garrus and Kasumi. "The two of you should head back to the ship and get checked out. You can do whatever you want after that. I don't expect either of you to do any more work today after what we've just been through."
Kasumi nodded her assent. "I'll see the two of you later then. It's not that it hasn't been great fun being stranded on this planet with you for two days, but I need to do some serious unwinding now. Sometimes having a fully stocked bar in your quarters really pays off."
She walked away with a grin on her face, but Garrus hadn't budged one inch yet. He really could be a stubborn bastard sometimes. Shepard usually admired him for it, but right now she wasn't entirely sure if his determination was a virtue or an incredibly annoying flaw.
She folded her arms. "Garrus, I told you to go back to the ship,"
"You did, but if you're staying out here, then so am I."
"Don't be stupid. You sustained a head injury less than forty eight hours ago. Dr Chakwas needs to check you out."
"As I recall, I wasn't the one in serious pain yesterday, that was you." Shepard glared at him. "Look, how about we make a deal with each other? We'll both stay out here until the prisoners leave and then we'll go to the med-bay together for treatment. Sound fair, Shepard?"
She didn't know what to say. The truth was she did want him to stay with her, but she was still worried about starting to rely on him too much. Over the years, she'd gotten so used to dealing with everything herself, no matter how hard it got. Besides, he really did need to get his injury looked at.
"So do we have a deal?" he asked, pushing her for an answer.
Shepard got the impression that no matter what she said next, he would still refuse to leave. "Fine, Garrus, but I'm not exactly in a talkative mood right now. I don't think I'll be very good company."
"That's okay. We don't have to talk."
"You do realise we're both going to look insane?"
He smiled at her. "Yeah, that thought had crossed my mind. I just don't care."
"Fair enough."
Shepard plonked herself down on the ground and Garrus dutifully began to hover behind her. After a little while, she saw some of the Normandy crew leave the ship and give blankets and food to all of the rescued prisoners. She hoped the gesture, though small, would bring them some comfort.
Mordin and Dr Chakwas came out of the ship next and began to check each one of the humans for injuries. Shepard could still remember all too clearly the first time she was examined by a doctor after Mindoir. She'd cried through most of it.
Her doctor had been a kindly man, at least sixty years old with a rough-looking beard and grey hair. To his credit, he'd tried his best to calm her down, but without much success. Before he'd left Shepard alone in her hospital bed, he had smiled and told her that she would be as good as new soon enough. Even back then, at sixteen, she could remember thinking what a load of bullshit.
"Shepard?"
She straightened up. "Yeah, Garrus?"
"What are you thinking about? Your forehead's gone all creasy."
"Oh, a few different things."
"You're still sure you want to stay out here?"
She nodded and drifted far away from him again. Half an hour passed by before Mordin and Chakwas finally headed back into the ship, leaving the survivors from the base by themselves. They sat down on the ground, huddling together in small groups, sometimes clinging to each other. No one seemed to be talking much. Perhaps that was hardly a surprise: what could they possibly say to each other after everything they'd just been through?
While Shepard had been waiting for the Alliance shuttle to take her away from Mindoir, she'd stood by herself because she didn't recognise any of the other survivors. At least these people still had each other, even if they didn't feel much like making small talk right now.
At some point, it started to rain, forcing the whole group to seek out shelter under the trees. Huge droplets were pounding into the ground, but Shepard didn't move so neither did Garrus. Soon the rain was falling down both their armoured bodies in streams, creating puddles at their feet.
Garrus shook himself, sending water flying everywhere. "Well this just get better. What's next, lightening? A hurricane? It didn't rain at all when we were in that damn cave and now it pours! I know I told you that turians don't like the cold but we don't care for torrential rain much either." He sounded completely miserable.
"You should go back to the Normandy, Garrus," Shepard said, "You look terrible, like you've been half-drowned. I'm not going to be upset if you leave. I promise. You really don't have to stay with me."
"Yeah I do." His voice had softened. "Anyway, I'm enjoying the wonderful view, it's very...hilly."
By the time the Alliance ship finally arrived, Shepard's hair was soaking and stuck all over her face. She had to push the wet strands out of her eyes so she could watch as the Alliance officers exited the vessel and headed over to help the rescued prisoners. They started to prepare them for evacuation almost immediately. Maybe it was wishful thinking on Shepard's part, but she could have sworn she saw a few of the survivors smile for the first time since they'd been freed from the cells. She supposed it was because they knew there was nothing left to stop them from leaving this planet now. Rescue had come and they would all soon be far away from here.
It took less than half an hour for the Alliance to get everyone, including the batarian mechanic from the base, loaded onto the ship. By then, the sun had come out again and Garrus no longer looked so much like he wanted to curl up in a ball and die.
"They're all on-board now, Shepard," he said.
"Yeah, I know" she replied. "I want to watch them fly away. It's stupid, but I need to see them go."
"It's not stupid."
The Alliance ship caught the sunlight when it finally lifted off, but even though the glare stung Shepard's eyes, she didn't look away. She continued to watch as it ascended higher and higher, eventually soaring miles above the trees and hills.
Leaning back on her elbows, she gestured towards the sky. "The last time I saw Mindoir it was a faraway dot, just like that ship is now. That was almost fifteen years ago and it still feels like yesterday sometimes."
"So you never went back?" Garrus asked. He sat down beside her on the grass.
"No. I didn't want to use what precious little shore leave I got over the years reliving my old childhood traumas." She knew Garrus was watching her intently as she answered him, but she wasn't sure if she wanted to meet his eyes. "Besides, in case you haven't noticed over the last week, I tend to have trouble dealing with anything that upsets me or makes me feel overly emotional."
"Have you ever thought about going back?"
"Not really."
There was an awkward pause for a few seconds before Garrus spoke again. "While we were on the Citadel, I overheard a news report which said Mindoir had put an image of you on its colonial seal. That's quite an honour."
"I guess it is." Shepard relaxed enough to smile at him. "I saw a picture of it on the extranet. The damn thing doesn't look a thing like me. There's no way my nose is that big"
"Well it must be hard to capture someone like you in one image."
Shepard's smile grew wider. "Did you just successfully complement me? I could get used to this."
"You probably shouldn't. I don't always seem to be so great with words when I'm alone with you. Although I've now gone three days now without saying anything too horrific. It must be some kind of record." He paused, looking serious again. "Shepard, do you think you might want to go back to Mindoir one day?"
"I don't know, Garrus..."
She trailed off without giving him a proper answer to his question because she didn't really have one. Not right now anyway. Her eyes returned to the sky. There was a speck high above their heads which might have been the ship, but it was impossible to tell anymore.
"Shepard, listen to me, they'll be okay," Garrus said as if he was reading her thoughts.
"Yeah..."
Perhaps they really would be. Shepard's own life had worked out well in the end, hadn't it? She was a spectre. She had her own ship, a loyal crew, friends. Right now she was sitting with someone who loved her, who was always there for her when she needed him. She couldn't really ask for any more than that.
Garrus realised Shepard was staring at him and cocked his head at her. "Come on, we've watched them leave, it's time to go to the med-bay." He rose back up to his feet. "Don't make me drag you, Shepard."
"I'd like to see you try, Vakarian." But she smiled. "Alright I'm coming."
She held out her hand and let him hoist her back up to her feet. "Lead on, big guy."
This chapter was originally meant to be much, much longer but I had to split it in half because it didn't feel cohesive enough. Unfortunately, that left the depressing part out on its own. Writing it was very draining at times so I'm glad it's over and done with now.
On the plus side, I'm already looking forward to writing the next part - thankfully it's much less angsty. It will probably still be two weeks before I update again though. I need to recharge for a few days!