Chapter 7
Time slowed considerably for Matt as the days progressed, and he didn't.
Jesse made sure to wait until Jackie had left and Matt's overall condition improved enough, before resuming the full-time hunt for the drug dealers that put his son in the hospital in the first place. Although Jesse's evenings were spent at the hospital with his sons, Cody was still the one left with the arduous task of keeping Matt's spirits up during the day.
The youngest Hawkes took his time walking from the elevator, to his brothers room. "Wow, look at you sitting there like a king", Cody teased lightly, as he entered. It was a nice change to see his brother semi-upright and more alert. "How're you doing?"
Matt fought off another wave of nausea, an unpleasant side effect from being positioned more vertical, after spending so much time flat on his back. "Okay", he let the words come out with his breath, "Where's Dad?".
"He said he had some kind of appointment". It was all Cody could offer, even he didn't know where their father was going off to day after day. "You look a lot better today".
"Nice try Cody", Matt muttered distantly, "But the orderly held up a mirror today when he shaved me---". He let those words trail off, unable to continue, as he quickly remembered that he wasn't able shave himself, or feed himself; hell, he couldn't even scratch his own nose.
Matt's gaze traveled to the useless hands lying in his lap. Instinctively, Cody reached out, "Here, let me see what you have".
"Cody", Matt protested, but was powerless to do anything about it.
Cody placed Matt's right hand into his and waited patiently for his brother to squeeze it. "C'mon Crusher, let me have it", he encouraged playfully. Matt focused harder, but the only result was a faint twitch, no stronger than yesterday or the day before. Cody tried not to show his disappointment, and when Matt's eyes flickered up to meet his, he challenged, "It's not up to my standards, but I suppose you can't match that anyway".
"Not anymore, I can't", Matt replied bitterly, and turned his head toward the window.
"Look Matt, I'm sorry". The last thing Cody wanted to do was upset his brother in his already fragile state. "I didn't mean---".
The arrival of Dr. Denny halted any attempts at an apology from Cody. "Hi Matt. Hello Cody", she greeted cheerfully, then quickly got to work checking Matt's vitals. It was getting harder and harder to do, but Cody watched from the corner as his brother remained despondent, returning the doctor's questions with clipped, one or two word answers; much like he did with every other person who came into his room.
It wasn't until the doctor moved to check Matt's still unresponsive reflexes, something that Cody was still unable to accept; that he quietly let himself slip from the room.
"Dad?", Cody called, catching his father just as he was coming out of the bedroom, on his way out.
Jesse turned to face his son. He could see the stress of the past few weeks was taking it's toll on the older man. There were prominent frown lines starting to appear on his forehead, and dark circles under his eyes. Cody had to wonder what was tougher though, heeding the "crusade" to find those responsible for injuring Matt, or being the one who had to watch him struggling to deal with those injuries.
"What is it son?", Jesse asked softly, taking his time even though he looked to be in a hurry.
Cody nervously shifted from one foot to the other. "I was just wondering if you knew what time you'll be getting to the hospital today".
"Not sure, after my meeting I suppose", he replied casually as he slipped into his jacket, "Unless I come across another lead". Cody didn't try to hide his disappointment, he didn't think his father would notice anyway; Jesse had been far too preoccupied. "Why, was there something you needed?".
"No, I guess not", Cody generalized, instead of saying what was really on his mind. It wasn't what he needed, it was what Matt needed.
"You sure?", Jesse pressed.
"Yeah".
Pretending to be satisfied with that answer, Jesse merely nodded and headed for the door. He stopped after turning the nob and glanced over his shoulder, to offer, "Maybe I can drop by hospital for a little while, before my meeting; give you the morning off?".
"Sure Dad, thanks", the boy replied, not at all surprised that his father knew exactly what he needed, even when he didn't ask. Jesse smiled warmly and was just about to leave when Cody called out sheepishly, "Hey Dad, you got some cash?".
"Yeah, what do you want it for?", Jesse asked, as he dug into his pocket to fish out the money.
Cody cracked a smirk and shrugged innocently, "Lunch".
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It had been about a week since the doctors gave the okay for Matt to be moved from the intensive care section, to the step down unit. Ironically, the room numbers were the same, only now the room was located on the west side of the fifth floor, instead of the east.
"Hey Matt", Cody greeted as he walked in that afternoon with an armful of goodies. "Hungry?", he asked, unloading the packages of food onto the bed table that was currently pushed against the wall.
"Already ate", he answered distantly.
"What, that slop they try to pass off as food?", Cody joked. "How can you even eat that stuff?".
"It's kind of hard to refuse when you have a nurse force feeding you every meal", Matt countered briskly in reply. That was a lie and Cody knew it, he'd passed the lunch cart in the hall on his way in, and Matt's tray was practically full; as it was most days. The only time Matt ever made an effort to eat his meals, is when Jesse was there to oversee it; otherwise, they went nearly untouched.
Cody tried not to let his brother's mood bring him down, not after that chance encounter he just had with the pretty candy stripper at the elevator. He knew that if he'd come in early that morning when he was supposed to, he might not have ever met Wendy. It was destiny.
"Dad gave me some money this morning, so I went to the deli a few blocks away, that got that huge writeup in the newspaper. It was really hard to choose, so I went with the Italian, the classic and the potato salad; not to mention chips, cookies and some of those---".
"Cody, I said I wasn't hungry!".
"Okay, no need to get snippy. ", he relented, quickly turning his attention to the other delivery he had for his brother. "Maybe this will cheer you up then".
"What's is it?", Matt asked, straining slightly to peer into the open cardboard box Cody had placed next to his thigh.
"Your fan mail", Cody teased, grinning.
Matt was clearly puzzled. "What?".
Cody sat down on the bed next to Matt. "It seems you're a pretty popular guy. Mail's been pouring into the ranger station, and the guys have been nice enough to collect it for you. Robin sent it out as soon as I told her you were in a regular room".
"You still talk to Robin?", Matt asked softly.
Cody could barely contain his grin. It wasn't a huge surprise to him that Matt would be more intrigued by the sender of the package rather than the package itself, it was just nice to see his brother interested in something. And so Cody decided to run with it, "Yeah, and Frank and Izzy, whoever's there to answer the phone. We talk at least two or three times a week. They've all been really concerned about you and want regular updates on how you're doing---".
Matt let out a deep sigh and let his head fall back onto the pillow. "Why? It's not like there's anything to tell them".
"That's not true Matt. Even Dr. Denny's happy that you can---".
"What Cody, be propped up at a 45 degree angle and move a finger or two on my right hand?", Matt grated sarcastically, "Now that's really something to write home about".
"Yeah, it is", Cody retorted snappishly, "And I call home; they write back". He grabbed a fist full of different sized and colored envelopes and held them up for emphasis, "Everyone back home is really worried about you, Matt, they miss you". Cody started to flip through the letters. "See, here's a get well card from Mom's friend Margie. Here's one from the Sheriff's department. A homemade card from Aaron Bass's granddaughter Jen---", he held up the construction paper creation for Matt to see. It was a quick glance, but Cody could see his brothers expression soften a little. "A letter from Robin, one from Frank, and Izzy, another one from Robin, another get well card, this one is from---". Cody stopped abruptly, after he turned the envelope over to read the return address.
"Who's it from Code?".
Of course, now he was curious. Cody mentally chided himself for not checking the identity of the senders before he started rattling things off. "It's um---", he stuttered uncomfortably and averted his eyes.
"Cody?", Matt demanded.
After a stalling sigh, Cody looked back up at his brother. "It's from the Cutler family", he answered, as gently as he could.
Matt immediately turned as white as the sheets he was laying on, as his chest began to constrict painfully. His head stared to spin with unpleasant thoughts; Why? Why were they sending him a get well card? I was the one who got their son killed.
Cody desperately wanted to take back the words he's just uttered, but he couldn't; so changing the subject was his only option. "I can read the letters to you, if you want. Or I can just leave them open for you to read when you're---".
"Just put them over there Cody", Matt instructed, motioning with a nod of his head, to the far corner of the room.
Cody walked over to the window and began to open and arrange various cards on the small ledge.
"No, leave 'em in the box", Matt barked, once he saw what his brother was doing.
Cody looked over his shoulder and gave Matt a confused look, "But you won't be able to look at them if they're just sitting in the box".
"Exactly. Out of sight, out of mind", Matt muttered, even though he knew that couldn't be farther from the truth.
There was a request for more Matt, and personally I couldn't agree more, his presence has been sorely lacking. So Bettina, I hope this sufficed. Poor boy though, I'm really putting him through the ringer. In this chapter, I've incorporated some of the things from those scenes that I liked, while giving it a morose feel that fits better with this storyline. And while there were a few things perplexed me about the hospital scenes(Dr. Denny's contradicting diagnosis being the biggest one), I always thought that Matt seemed far too cheerful for what he was going through.
Thank you for the continued reviews, they are greatly appreciated.
~Missy~