AN: Okay! Now, I've gotten a few reviews asking me "What the freak happened with Charlie?!" Well, this chapter shall explain everything. Now, keep in mind that none of the Cullens know that Charlie rapes her, and that it was one of the key factors why she started to cut herself and do drugs.
Bella woke up that morning, alone in her bed. She looked at the clock, oblivious that Edward was still in the room with her, watching her every move, and gasped. It was 7:00. Why hasn't Charlie barged into the room already and beat her every inch of life out of her? Was he waiting downstairs? Without thinking about anything, she quickly got up from her bed, and Edward was quickly there to catch her before she hit the floor. He stood her up on her feet, cupped her face in his hands, and looked at her dark, broken eyes.
"Why are you awake so early?" he whispered in her ear, as he ran his hand over her shirt, trying to ignore the spine that felt like it would break her skin any minute.
Shit, why did he have to ask me about Charlie?
Bella stayed quiet, hoping that Edward would forget the subject. Maybe she could make something up…?
"Exercise." She said quickly in one word. She heard Edward sigh, and kiss her neck gently.
"We have to get you help soon." said Edward, hugging her tightly. She tried to hug back, but it didn't come to her. Edward didn't seem to mind, as he didn't let go or ask her what's wrong. They were like this for a few minutes before Bella decided what to do.
"No." she suddenly said. Edward let go of her and looked at her confused.
"No what?" he asked. She looked at his eyes. It would hurt him, what she was going to say next, but right now, the little person in her called Ana was crying out for help, and she couldn't let him hurt her.
"No, I'm not getting help. I'm perfectly fine." She said with a cold voice, walking away from Edward. He looked at her, his eyes in pain.
"You promised…" he started to say, but Bella cut him off.
"You promised as well. You promised that you would be by my side forever, whenever I needed you weren't. If you don't like me the way I am, then I suggest you leave, and just leave me alone." She said, her back suddenly turned back to him looking at the snow that started to fall on her front lawn. She wasn't crying. She wasn't sad, nor was she happy. It was nothing. She was nothing right now.
She could hear Edwards footsteps walking out off the room, closing the door behind him. After a minute, she could see him walk out of the house, to his silver Volvo. He looked up at Bella, and she turned away, locking herself in her closet.
She was certain Edward could hear her, but she screamed as loud as she could, her fingernails clawing at the rug on the floor. No one was in the house to mind her dreadful screaming. She took out a razor she had hidden in an old tin box, filled with other pictures of skinny models and her sketch book, which inside were drawings of mostly suicide. She started to slash every part of her arms that she could as quickly as possible, so she could see the blood, and feel the pain that she deserved.
A few minutes had passed, and the floor was covered in splotches of blood. She was disoriented, but she didn't really care. She would pass out soon, and just die of blood loss.
Soon came. She could feel everything getting black, even though her closet door was open, letting in every possible light from the open window. The pain eventually stopped, and darkness overcame her.
Or at least, she hoped. She was conscious, but everything was dark. Was this how it felt to be dead? It seemed like hours that she was like this. Maybe she was dead, and this is how it would be for all eternity, feeling that she was alive, even though she wasn't.
"Bella?! Oh god Carlisle, I don't think she's breathing!" said a frantic voice. It was distant, but familiar. She couldn't make out who it was.
"No, Edward she'll be fine. We need to get back home though, she's lost a lot of blood." said another voice. It wasn't as frantic, but still worried.
Crap. I'm not dead .I'm like slightly passed out. Shit. And all this time I hoped I could rid everyone of the pain I cause them.
All the Cullens were sitting in the Carlisles office, waiting for some sign that Bella, who was now laying down on a gurney unconscious with an IV in her arm, to wake up. Jasper had to leave because he was getting a bit out of hand when Bella came in, bleeding from her thighs and wrists. Rosalie accompanied him, because she didn't really care much for Bella.
The one who cared the most, naturally, was Edward. He kept on repeating in his head that she didn't mean she said, and that she was depressed. He was sitting on a chair next to Bella, holding her hand, his face hidden. Everyone was silent, listening to Bella's heartbeat.
"How much longer, Alice?" Edward asked for the fifth time in the last hour. No one was bothered though. It was understandable.
"5 minutes exactly." She said looking down at the floor. Carlisle stood up and walked over to Edward. He crouched down to meet him eye to eye, even though Edward didn't look up.
"If you don't want us to be here when she wakes up, we'll leave." Carlisle said in a low voice. Edward looked up at Carlisle. He could see the pain in his sons' eyes, and he didn't have to respond. Carlisle stood up and asked everyone to leave the room.
When the door closed, Edward stood up, and even though he knew he wasn't supposed to, he laid down next to Bella with whatever space was left. She was so tiny, almost took up the whole bed, even though he was on his side, and she fit perfectly.
He counted in his head five minutes, while he played with Bella's hair. And, as Alice surely predicted, at exactly five minutes, she woke up.
"I'm sorry." Edward whispered in her ear.
"Why are you sorry? I did this to myself, and I should be sorry for causing you so much pain." She said in a low, hoarse voice. Edward kissed her neck, his breath sending shivers down Bella's spine.
"It's still my fault for leaving you. This time, I swear, I will never leave you. No matter how dangerous I am." He whispered in her ear. Bella turned her head to face him.
"Really?" she said, with a hint of hope in her voice.
I cannot believe how much she loves me, even after what I did. How stupid could I have been.
"Yes. Really. Now, can I ask a favor from you?" He said, his eyes closed, trying not to break down in front of her. He needed to be strong for her.
"Yes. Anything." She said, her finger running over his knuckles. He really did hope she meant she would do anything.
"Get help." He said, sitting up and looking at her. She looked straight into his eyes. After a few moments, she nodded. Edward broke out the biggest grin he had, jumping off the gurney. "You mean it?! You'll do it?!" he said excitedly, practically jumping up and down. She nodded, a smile on her face at how excited Edward was. Then, out of nowhere, Alice barged into the room, squealing.
"I'm sorry, but Edward told us everything when you were unconscious but I'm so happy your getting help! Oh, I can't wait until your all better!" she said, lifting Bella off the bed and embracing her in a tight hug.
"Alice….can't…breathe!" she managed to say, before Alice let go of her.
"Sorry!" she said, as Emmett, Carlisle and Esmee came in, a smile on their face. Emmett was the first one by her side, as he embraced her in another tight bear hug.
"Emmett, let the poor girl breathe!" said Esmee, as she approached Bella with Carlisle by her side. They both stood at the edge of the bed, with a smile on their face.
"I can't wait until you truly get better. We missed you! Don't think we didn't." said Esmee. Why did she have to be like such a mother?
"Charlie is here!" Rosalie yelled up the stairs, even though she knew she didn't. Why couldn't she just come up and say it? Bella's heartbeat started to speed up, and everyone seemed to notice, because they were looking at her concerned.
"Oh, can one of you go downstairs and invite him in? I need to take this IV out of Bella. They all left, since the sudden introduction to blood might trigger something, even though they knew they could never do that to Bella. "So, why are you nervous about Charlie?" asked Carlisle. But, Carlisle would get his answer without Bella needing to answer.
"Where the fuck is that little slut?!" he yelled so loudly, it could be heard all around the house. Bella started to suddenly cry, covering her face from Carlisle. He hugged her.
"Don't worry. He won't hurt you. I won't let him. I'm guessing he's done this before?" asked asked Bella. She nodded, but she could never tell anyone about what he really does every night. Not even the Cullens would ever find out.
"She was supposed to be home! I left her a damn note that I was going to be away, but I guess the stupid whore doesn't know how to read. I will kill her!" he yelled.
"Please don't let him hurt me, Carlisle." said Bella. She was frantic by now, shaking uncontrollably in Carlisles arms.
"Let me see her! Now, damnit! I know she can hear me. Bella, come on, I know what you want!" he yelled in a taunting evil voice. This was too much for her. She couldn't stand them knowing what really happens. She was crying and screaming, Carlisle trying to keep her under control.
This was too much for her, and her heart finally gave in, as she fell unconscious.
R&R please? Next chapter will come along in a few days since I am on winter break.