A/N:
Hey guys! How's it going? Alright, I think I'm within the time frame I set for myself for getting this chapter up so YAY! :) And, SHOCKING NEWS, this one actually doesn't end on a cliff hanger…I mean, it ends with the anticipation of an event in the next chapter but it's not like when I kept you guys hanging on for Arnold reacting to the closet shrine or talking about his problem with the kissing, lol. Also, whereas the other chapters were more focused on the romance and Arnold and Helga, this chapter really is about giving Helga something I think we can all agree she deserves as a character in her life besides the requiting of her unrequited love—a decent home life! (In fact, this is the only chapter of this fic in which Arnold's not present at all! He'll be back though in the next chapter, don't worry ;) ). And, as I've mentioned before, I like that this fic is giving me a chance to wrap up a lot of loose ends from TA, so I figured we might as well call Bob and Miriam on their actions on top of everything, am I right? Besides, working on their relationship with Helga now makes stuff that happens in the chapters dealing with Sunday a lot more fun ;)
Okay, so, please read and review as always my lovely HA! fandom! You're comments make me smile (and make me quit watching Law & Order SVU marathons to do more edits!)
Also, YAY, I'm now employed! More income to continue eBaying HA! stuff for my collection!
LEARNING TO BE HELGA
Chapter 7:
Helga's Mom and Dad
"Ugh…did anyone get the license plate number of the truck that hit me?" Helga groggily sat up a bit in her bed, rubbing the back of her head and blinking a few times as her eyes met with a bright (well, bright for someone who'd been out cold for several minutes) light.
Helga squinted briefly at first, but then finally managed to open her eyes fully upon which she looked around and took in that she was lying in her bed in her room alone. The darkness outside of her window told her that it was nighttime and she realized that the bright light that had met her eyes was coming from the lamp beside her bed on her nightstand…where her Arnold locket also sat, nicely propped up against the base of the lamp (similar to where she had left it upon finishing up her poetry writing before her beloved's arrival several hours ago).
Her eyes went wide at the sight of it and she instantly snatched the small gold object away from this more-than-conspicuous location, staring at it with just a bit of fright, to say the least. "Miriam didn't actually see this…right? I mean…" she glanced around at her indeed empty room, "I'm in bed right now and the locket's where it's supposed to be…so that…that was all probably a dream, right?" She looked around her empty room once more to confirm that was indeed nowhere in sight, and then crawled across her bed to her closed window, out of which she could only see the dark mass of her tree against the inky sky, blowing a bit in the late spring breeze.
"Or…" her face fell a bit, "Or maybe it was all just a dream…" Helga frowned, recalling her beloved's former warm presence at her now dark and cold window…and how maybe it had all really just been her imagination…"The anniversary, the shoe, the shrine, all of the kisses…and that last one…" She felt her heart beat wildly at the idea and couldn't help smile just slightly. "Arnold actually coming up here, grabbing me and kissing me like that… Yeah, really, in my dreams..." She closed her eyes and shook her head in amusement, despite the bit of disappointment that this new doubt had created in her. "Sheesh, I almost have half a mind to call his house and see if EVERYTHING that's happened lately hasn't just been my imagination getting away from me…" She almost chuckled as she added mentally, recalling certain events from the previous Friday, 'If I was wrong, though, Gerald would never let me hear the end of it…'
Helga's thoughts were suddenly interrupted by the sound of her door quietly opening and closing behind her.
She whipped around to see her mother tip-toeing across the room with a glass of water. Helga quickly slipped her locket around her neck and under her nightshirt. 'I don't know how much of everything was a dream or not, but I am not taking any chances.'
Miriam, meanwhile, upon catching the movement of her daughter out of the corner of her eye, paused in her journey across the room and looked up at her and smiled. "Oh, Helga, you're awake! Good…" she said with a relieved sigh, walking the rest of the way across the room. She smiled a bit more as she reached the edge of the bed. "You know, you got quite a bump on the head fainting like that. Are you okay?"
Helga glanced from the window to her mother and then slowly crawled back over to her pillow and rested back in the bed again, her thoughts racing…and panicked. 'Okay…so… there's a veryhigh chance, considering what she just asked me, that everything I think might have happened tonight actually indeed happened…including the locket.' She gulped, trying to calm herself (or at least prevent another shocked fainting spell). 'Okay, Helga old girl, just play it cool…Just play it cool…Hey, at least if it is all true it means that Arnold actually did sweep swept you off your feet a few hours ago...' Helga swallowed hard and did her best to put aside memories of her beloved's seemingly real actions and to address her mother in as casual a voice as possible. "Uh…yeah…I'm, uh…I'm fine, Miriam…" She pulled the covers back over her body, still eyeing her mother with worry. 'Yeah, fine…and probably dead…Oh man, I've never even thought about what would happen if she, of all people, ever…ever found out that I…' Helga shuddered, not letting the thought finish.
Miriam just smiled again at the response. "Oh, good." She then turned a bit and was about to place the glass of cold water for her daughter on her nightstand…when she hesitated and blinked, looking at the place she'd been about to put it. She turned back to Helga. "Helga, where did you little locket go?"
'Oh…my…' Helga could feel a ringing starting in her ears. 'Oh…oh for the love of… This…this isn't happening… This isn't…. Oh boy…' She felt seriously woozy for a second and collapsed back all the way on her pillows, putting a hand to her head.
"Helga…?" Miriam put the glass down and then leaned over her daughter, putting the back of her hand to her forehead. "You don't feel warm but you look so pale… Are you sure you're okay, honey? Do you want me to make you some soup or something?"
At the feeling of her mother's touch upon her face, Helga instantly felt a new wave of nausea: like somehow the physical contact was suddenly making all the more real the situation that Miriam now knew that she loved Arnold. Helga pulled away and turned toward the wall, pulling her legs to her chest and pulling the covers completely over her head. "Oh…" she moaned, closing her eyes tight. 'Ugh, let me wake up! Let this be a dream! Please!'
"Helga?" The concern in Miriam's voice was growing as she stood up and surveyed her daughter (or rather, the shape of her daughter curled in a ball and hidden under pink sheets and a pink blanket).
"OH…." Helga moaned again. "Miriam, just go—I can't believe that Olga told you…and then you found my…Oh, just go!" She didn't sound angry so much as desperate and still a little ill as these muffled words came out of her mouth.
This sudden explanation for Helga's strange behavior couldn't help but bring a slight smile to Miriam's mouth. She sighed and then sat on the edge of Helga's bed, putting a comforting hand on her shoulder which was still buried along with the rest of her body underneath the covers. "Helga, is that what's bothering you…" she began in an understanding tone, "That I found out that you've got a little boyfriend?"
"UGH!" Helga moaned, cringing. 'I'm calling Bliss for an emergency session first thing in the morning. This is completely worse than the class finding out about my poetry, them hearing Arnold's poem about me, and Gerald finding out about the shrine COMBINED! Completely worse!'
Miriam couldn't help but giggle slightly at her daughter's continued dramatics. "Oh, Helga…" she sighed, removing her hand from her shoulder, "You know, you shouldn't blame Olga for talking to me about it… Besides…" Helga couldn't see it, but her mother's smile became just a bit slyer as she continued, "I thought there must be something between you and that little Arnold boy ever since a few weeks ago when he brought you home and took care of you after you got hit on the head by that baseball…" She smiled warmly to herself at the memory. "He was so nice about everything… And then didn't he come by to walk you to school in the morning?"
'She…thought…WHAT?' Helga instantly shot up, the covers flying away from her. "You thought WHAT? WHEN?" Her wide eyes fell upon her mother's smiling face.
Miriam blinked, surprised by the reaction. "Well…" she began in explanation, "He was so good to take care of you like that, Helga…You must have realized he was a little sweet on you…"
Helga felt herself blush. It didn't help that she then instantly recalled some of what Arnold had said earlier that evening about thinking that he might have liked her for a lot longer than he'd ever realized…about how it felt to him like he had been almost waiting for her confession to deal with it all. She swallowed and turned to her mother, once again putting aside reminiscing about her beloved and all of the wonderful memories he'd given her this evening in order to fully deal with the situation at hand. "Miriam…I…" and then, suddenly, she found herself scowling, as what Miriam had just said (as well as the degree to which her defensive nature could use it as a defense mechanism) truly processed, "Hey, if you thought that he…" Helga couldn't bring herself to actually say it… "If you thought that he…you know…then—then why didn't you ever say anything?" Her scowl became firmer, and she raised an arm in a gesticulation. "I mean, seriously—where is this sudden insight coming from?" She then crossed her arms over her chest and added with even more anger and annoyance, "Except, of course, from Olga who I'm going to find a way to murder despite the fact that there's an entire country between us."
Miriam blinked once more at this sudden angry exclamation and then frowned slightly, glancing away from Helga. "Oh, well, I…I'm sorry I didn't mention it sooner, sweetie… It's just…well, when it's just you and your father and me in the house, I guess I just…" That dazed look that Miriam was so famous for suddenly came to her face. "I don't know…I kind of forget about things…"
Helga rolled her eyes, scowling even more, her usual gruff and defensive demeanor in full swing. 'Miriam letting me down in the end—oh WHAT a SURPRISE!' "Oh great!" she began, gesticulating once again, "So, because I'm not good enough to jog your memory, we're having this horrible conversation about a million years after when it would have actually been helpful to me instead of just making me want to drop off the face of the world? Fantastic, Miriam. Thank you!" And, with these words and a final frustrated scowl, Helga then threw herself back down on her bed, facing the wall again, and pulled the blankets up around near her shoulders and head…though this time, at least, she didn't cover her face.
Miriam, her eyes now wide at this second outburst, just blinked several times as she took in her daughter's words. Then a frown instantly came to her face. "Oh Helga…" she put a hand on the blankets covering her daughter's shoulder once more. "Don't say that. It's just that…" she glanced back and forth several times, as though trying to find the right words to express things, "It's just that when Olga comes she always has a million things to say, and we talk and it all just gets easier…and then your father talks more too and we all just—"
At the words 'your father,' Helga, to Miriam's total surprise, instantly shot up again…a look of total panic on her face this time. "You two DID NOT tell BOB about this!" She recalled in an instant how much Bob had freaked out just from thinking that her and Arnold had been hanging out alone when she had been tutoring him…but to now have an idea that they might be seriously dating…? 'He'll go kill Arnold right now…' She swallowed hard. 'And then he'll kill me! For the love of…Forget the 9am phone call to Bliss—if they told Bob, there's going to be a phone call to Arnold RIGHT NOW telling him to get out of town ASAP!'
A startled Miriam, meanwhile, almost stood, the amount of fear in her daughter's voice was so surprising and so great… But then, reflecting on the specifics of the question, she just smiled down at Helga reassuringly. "Honey, of course we didn't say anything to your father! Olga and I just got the chance to talk alone while he was parking the car and getting the bags at the airport, and that's when she brought up…uh, Arnold, right?"
Helga let out a huge sigh of relief and closed her eyes for a second. "Thank you…" she couldn't help but sigh with an obvious amount of gratitude to her mother. 'Sheesh, besides the football head killing spree he'd go on, Bob barely knows how to act around me NOW… but if he knew I had a boyfriend…' She shuddered at the mere thought of how awkward every moment alone with her father would probably be as a result…
Suddenly, though, Helga realized the extent to which her question to Miriam about whether or not Bob 'knew' had possibly (or probably completely) confirmed the truth about there indeed being something between her and Arnold to know about… And regardless of how desperate the situation, it was Helga's default to always guard her most intimate secret at all costs. Thus, her eyes flew open once more and, upon seeing her mother still looking at her with that sly little smile, she just swallowed hard and did her best to backpedal. "I—I mean…" she stuttered, "not that there's all that much to tell in the first place… Because I don't actually…Arnold's just a…We don't even really…" Miriam, however, just continued to sit there with a skeptical and slightly smug grin, and it wasn't making it any easier for Helga not to falter in her denials of her relationship with Arnold.
"Which would explain…" Miriam suddenly began in reply to her daughter's stammerings, crossing her legs and leaning a bit closer, "How nice he is to you, and everything your sister told me, and that cute heart shaped little locket of yours with his picture in it…" Miriam laughed slightly to herself and found her eyes moving back to Helga's nightstand in search of the object. She blinked, though, as she recalled that it was no longer there. With a puzzled sigh she stood up, her hands on her hips, eyeing the nightstand and the area around it with curiosity. "Now where is that little thing—I know I put it right near your lamp…" She began to search around.
"Miriam!" Helga instantly yelled in distress again, sitting up and being unable to help feeling the cool metal of the locket around her neck graze her skin. She grabbed one of Miriam's arms. "Just…for Pete's sake, Miriam—just leave it alone, okay?" She felt herself blushing and glanced down. "Crimeny—leave me with SOME dignity here!"
Miriam instantly stopped searching at this request, and couldn't help the smile returning to her face at her daughter's touch. She sighed, moving away from the nightstand. "Okay, Helga, you don't have to tell me where it is if you don't want to…But, you know, it's not the worst thing in the world if you have a little crush, sweetie…"
"Goodnight, Miriam!" Helga released her mother and quickly threw herself back into her bed with a scowl, pulling the covers up around her head once again.
Miriam just crossed her arms over her chest and sighed once more, this time in a bit of exasperation. Still turned to the wall, Helga (with a very intentional growl of annoyance) felt the pressure of her mother suddenly sitting down on the edge of her bed once more. "Fine, Helga, if you don't want to talk about it then at least just listen to me, okay?"
Helga shifted a bit under the sheets once again. 'Why does she have to pick THIS of all things to want to be a good Mom about and 'talk about'? WHY?' Still, it didn't look like Miriam was about to go away until she got this little parental moment out of her system, so Helga gave up on the protests for a moment and just decided to let her have her say if it meant she'd be leaving when it was over.
"Okay…" Miriam considered her words, and then did her best to comfort her obviously upset daughter. "Helga…before, when I said that things are easier when Olga's here…I didn't mean it was because you weren't good enough. I just meant…" she glanced to the side for another moment as she carefully weighed her words before continuing, "Well…Olga opens up to us, honey…and when she does it just reminds us that we're a family and it helps us bond a bit. But you never talk to us, Helga…you always stomp around here seeming so angry or upset, or you're out with your friends all day, or you lock yourself up here doing who knows what for hours…But you don't really let us into your life…"
Helga, her normally almost non-existent patience growing thin, growled much more audibly at her mother's ridiculous excuse for her constant neglect...it also didn't help that Miriam had just brought up the 'inexplicable' hours Helga could spend up here in her room doing 'who knows what'…and how that 'who knows what' now included certain heretofore unimaginable things with her beloved, as this evening had show her. "Yeah, well…" Helga did her best, once again, to pull herself out of the romantic memories that threatened to engulf her mind, and to focus on the fact that she was not at all happy with Miriam's sudden need to pry into her private life… "Well, if you weren't passed out all the time and off on another planet, and if Bob could actually remember my name, maybe I'd be a little more inclined to just 'gushing' to you two on the rare occasion when I actually get asked how my day was…"
Helga couldn't see it but Miriam really frowned at that observation, a serious look of guilt coming into her eyes. She sighed sadly. "I… You're right, Helga…"
That response made Helga's eyes open wide in surprise. Raising part of her brow, she slowly sat up, eyeing Miriam hesitantly. "What did you just say?"
Miriam wrung her hands in her lap, looking down almost in…shame? "I said you're right, Helga...You're father and I have been talking to Olga a bit and…she…she keeps telling us how things like that have been…well, bothering you a little…especially the thing about your name." She looked into Helga's eyes. "And we're…we're sorry, Helga…" she finished sincerely. "And we'd like to try a little harder if…if you'd like to…" She gave her daughter a weak smile.
Helga, meanwhile, as she had been during this entire little explanation, just continued to look at her mother with a face that was a perfect mixture of distrust and surprise. "Meaning…what…exactly…?" she finally asked slowly and hesitantly.
Miriam blinked at the interesting response…or rather, question. She glanced down for a moment as though in thought before replying. "Well…I mean…your Father's going to start calling you by your real name, of course…and I'm going to try and spend a bit more time with you and to have talks like we're having right now…" Her smile grew a bit. "And maybe we could…I don't…try doing some of those family bonding things that Olga always has us do when she's here." Miriam hesitated for a second but then reached forward and took one of her daughter's hands in her both of her own. "But we'd like you to be a bit more open with us too, Helga…to give us a chance." She almost seemed a bit teary-eyed as she continued. "I just…I feel like you're growing up so fast, honey, both of you girls—Olga's already going to graduate college and start a career and now you're interested in a boy and…" She sighed, looking at Helga as sincerely as possible. "Helga, whether you believe it or not…I really do want to be a good Mom to you and your Father wants to be a good Dad…And I know we forget sometimes but…I'm not forgetting right now, Helga."
Helga remained silent for a few more seconds, still eyeing Miriam's sincere smile with more than a touch of hesitation. Finally, she took a breath and spoke in a very no nonsense voice. "You'll understand if…if I'm a little skeptical, Miriam. It's been ten years, and Olga was only here for a week…and now you're coming at me with all of this 'I want to be a better Mom' crap? No offense but it's not like I haven't heard it before…" She scowled a bit more. "I think we had about the same talk after the whole Beeper Queen fiasco…and then half a week later we went right back to 'Mom, where's my lunch? Oh, I don't know, honey—check the empty fridge while I make another smoothie.' " She ripped her hand from her mother's grasp and crossed her arms over her chest, staring the older woman down accusingly. 'No one suckers Helga G. Pataki twice…not even another Pataki…and not even her own mother… No matter how soft being with Arnold might be making me…'
At these harsh words, Miriam glanced down guiltily once more, a frown on her face. "I…I know, Helga…and I'm sorry. But I—" She sighed in frustration and then looked to her daughter again. "But Helga—this is such an important thing in your life—your first little love! I don't want to miss out on this! And I don't want you to go through it all alone…" She tried to smile. "A girl needs her mother more than ever when she starts to have real relationships with boys…even a boy as nice and sweet as Arnold, Helga."
Helga blushed and scowled, pulling the blankets up tight around herself, and refusing to make eye contact with Miriam.
To her surprise, Miriam suddenly stood up and shifted down her bed, and then leaned forward so that she was directly in front of her, facing her. "Please, Helga…I…" Helga actually glanced up at her and lost the scowl for a second at the tone of Miriam's voice… She had never heard her mother sound so desperate for anything…and she had never looked so distraught, at least not that Helga could ever recall. "I want to be there for…" Miriam considered for a second, and then looked up and smiled, "…for the first time he holds your hand…"
Helga couldn't help but roll her eyes, her scowl slightly returning. "It's been a few weeks— you're a little late for that, Miriam…"
"Oh…" Miriam replied with a noticeable touch of disappointment. "Well…" she glanced down once more and put a hand to her chin, trying to come up with something else. "Um…for your first date, then…?" She looked up with a weak smile again.
Helga gave a frustrated sigh and lay back down in her bed. 'Oh brother…with how advanced Arnold and I are after the last seven years, we could be here all night!' "That would be last weekend before that slumber party Olga filled you in on…." she explained in mild irritation.
Miriam sighed as Helga continued showing her just how much she had already missed out on. "Okay…" she replied weakly. She was silent for a few seconds, wracking her brain for other potential 'firsts'… "Then…how about for the first time you really go out somewhere? Like to a restaurant or a school dance?"
Helga rolled her eyes, several of the events of the last year or so of her and Arnold's life instantly flashing through her mind. 'I knew it…here all night…' "WAY too late for that one, Miriam…"
Miriam let out an even more frustrated sigh, that look of guilt growing… But then her eyes lit up and a small smile came to her face. All in all, she seemed to have an idea…and a good one, at that. She looked to her daughter eagerly. "Well, for your first real kiss, then!"
"Skip on down…"
Darn that argument autopilot…that pesky, awkward situation inducing, secret blabbing, always making things that already seemed as bad as they could be even worse, argument autopilot.
Miriam blinked. Then, suddenly, her daughter's response fully hit her. "Oh, Helga!" Miriam exclaimed in delight. She instantly lunged forward and wrapped her arms around the ten-year-old blonde in a tight hug, smiling with joy.
Helga, meanwhile, slowly felt her entire nervous system shut down as what she'd just let slip really hit her… 'I just…I… Oh…my….' She swallowed hard, her eyes wide.
Miriam, meanwhile, oblivious to her child's sudden state of panic and terror, squeezed her tighter as she continued speaking. "Oh, Helga, he kissed you? Oh, my little baby—only ten and already kissed by a boy! Oh, tell me how it happened Helga! Was it during that first little date of yours last weekend?"
"Miriam!" Helga managed to choke out in both due to embarrassment and the need to breath once more. "Crushing windpipe…with Olga hug…"
"Oh—sorry, honey!" Miriam shifted back slightly, giving her daughter some breathing room, though the beaming and eager smile was more than still on her face. "Oh, but isn't that sweet? That nice little boy giving you your first real kiss…" Her eyes lit up again. "Did you kiss him back?"
"MOM!" Helga looked at her wide eyed, allowing all blankets to drop from around herself and blushing with indignation as though she couldn't believe the forwardness of the question (which was the truth—in fact, no one had been that bold with her about her relationship with Arnold except maybe for Gerald when he'd caught her and tossed a few heavy questions at her that weekend of all the tutoring).
"I'll take the blushing as a yes, Helga…" Miriam crossed her arms over her chest and grinned just a bit more wryly as she provided this playful response to her daughter's silence.
"MIRIAM!" All indignation was gone now, replaced by full force blushing and flat out panic!
Miriam couldn't help but laugh to herself and then just sigh at the overly flustered young girl before her. "Well, you really are growing up, aren't you, Helga?" she continued, ignoring the dramatics. "You know, Olga didn't have her first kiss until she was twelve…and she didn't have her first boyfriend until she was fifteen. You're quite a bit ahead of her…"
"Miriam," Helga began once more, shaking her head to clear it and then scowling darkly, "I already told you, I do NOT want to talk about—Wait…really?" Helga's angry eyes instantly went wide once again and she couldn't help but feel a touch of pride as this comment and its significance sank in. 'Well, at least I finally beat out Olga at something…and this is something that actually means something!' She couldn't help a very satisfied half smile coming to her face.
Miriam just nodded in response to her daughter's disbelief. "Mmm Hmm… Oh, she gushed about it to me for days…" She laughed to herself slightly, recalling the memory. "And then about the next boy and the next one…" She let out a happy sigh and smiled, looking at Helga. "And she still calls me up every time someone new asks her out…" That sincere tone and look she'd had ever since first sitting down to talk with Helga this evening came to her face once more, "And I just want the chance to be there for you for the same thing, Helga…"
"As if…" Helga couldn't help rolling of her eyes away from her mother or suddenly letting slip from her mouth out this (very misinterpretable) comment…
And, indeed, Miriam couldn't help but take the two simple words as further evidence of her younger daughter's continued rejection of her efforts to bond… And suddenly a look of pure sadness came into the older woman's eyes and for a moment she seemed almost...almost…well, just devastated. "Oh Helga…I… Oh Helga…"
The almost tearful voice in which her mother said her name just then couldn't help but make Helga glance at Miriam out of the corner of her eye. And then she blinked at the sad sight she saw. 'Crimeny, is she okay? She looks even worse than when she ran out of that commercial shooting while she was running the Beeper Empire and told me she was sorry for ignoring me…'
"Helga…" Miriam managed once more, and then finally found enough of a voice to continue, "I know that…I know that there's really no reason for you to care about letting me or your father try and be bigger parts of your life…And that you were probably just going along with a lot of that family bonding stuff this week because Olga was here and you girls have gotten so close…" She stopped glancing down and looked sincerely into Helga's eyes once more. "But please…if you could just give us one more chance. Even if you don't want to open up like Olga does right away…just something… And I promise you won't be disappointed this time, Helga…I mean it."
And it was then that it clicked with Helga how her mother had interpreted her 'As if…' 'Oh brother…You know, I never thought I'd say this but…I actually kind of feel bad for Miriam…and I think even a little…Aw, man, I'm feeling guilty again, aren't I?' She almost had to let out an exasperated sigh. 'Crimeny, Football Head—why didn't anyone tell me that growing a genuine conscience was part of the fine print for starting a real relationship with you?'
And so Helga considered for several more seconds…and then swallowed very hard and lost her scowl as a (not exactly ideal, if her defense mechanisms had anything to say about it) plan of action finally came to mind…And finally, with a very deep sigh and hoping very VERY much that she wouldn't end up regretting what she was about to do ('Darn it, Arnold! We're going to have a serious talk about this sudden compulsion of mine to do the right thing!'), she cleared her throat and did her best to clarify things. "Miriam…"she began hesitantly, all the while NOT making eye contact with her mother, "I… Sorry. I didn't mean that…well…that there was no chance that I'd ever talk to you about…things…" She COULD NOT bring herself to say 'boys.' "I just meant…" Helga stopped and instantly felt a furious blush come to her face as she realized just how nearly impossible it was going to be to try and explain what she'd meant without completely humiliating herself. "I…I…"
And then Helga had to pause for a second as a sense of déjà vous came over her…and she realized, with a blink, that she was stuck on her words because she was suddenly experiencing that pesky, frustrating feeling again…That feeling like when she'd been trying to tell Gerald the truth about Arnold in this same spot two weeks ago and had let that ball of fear inside of her stop her, tongue-tie her, make her turn to another stupid desperate lie instead of just admitting the truth already! The truth that, for crying out loud, Helga G. Pataki genuinely cared about another human being besides herself, and…and to heck with whoever had a problem with it!
As those memories and that current, annoying feeling washed over her, Helga scowled and finally let out a frustrated sigh. 'Oh for Pete's sake, why am I such a basketcase! I can freaking grab Arnold on a roof and pour my heart out to him but I can't just outright explain to MIRIAM that I…that I…' And then with another angry sigh at her own stubbornness, Helga suddenly tossed herself back down on the bed once again that evening, pulling the covers high around her shoulders as she faced the wall once more.
"Helga?" Miriam asked at her daughter's hesitation and then sudden show of anger. She raised an eyebrow.
In reply, Helga hesitated another second or two, then let out one more sigh…and finally closed her eyes and did her best not to subconsciously bite off her own tongue to prevent saying what she needed to say. 'Just keep reminding yourself that anything's worth Arnold loving you back…even…ugh, this!' "I just meant…" she swallowed, and willed herself onward, "I just meant, before, that I'm not some boy crazy teenager like Olga was…you know, hopping from guy to guy." She took another breath. "I lo—like Arnold…" 'Hey, let's not push things!' "Plain and Simple. And if I ever did completely lose my mind and talk to you about all this…boys stuff…" she shifted uncomfortably, having finally managed to at least say the word, "It wouldn't be about my latest crush for the next two weeks or something ridiculous like that…" And then with a one last release of breath she finally admitted in a light voice, "It would just all be about…Arnold..."
As Helga had spoken, Miriam had just stared at her with a surprised look….and she continued to do so as her daughter suddenly cleared her throat and continued…
"Anyway," Helga began in a less frustrated and mortified sounding tone, "That's why I said 'As if…' before when you were talking about Olga telling you about all those guys...Because 'as if' there's anyone else I'd ever like …except Arnold." She scowled a bit to herself as she added on a stronger note, "So quit trying to make me seem like some miniature Olga. Because I'm Helga. And I'm Olga's sister not Olga's second coming!" And with this last bit of telling the truth for once, Helga took a deep breath and gave herself a 'five minute break.' 'Well, there we go…I just made a complete idiot of myself to make Miriam feel better. Arnold, you SO owe me another make out session for this! Darn you and your contagious do-gooder nature!' She felt her heart flutter slightly… 'Even if it IS wrapped in that adorable Football Head form of yours…with those wild tufts of hair that I love to run my fingers through when we embrace…and those intoxicating green eyes that burn into me especially when they get that edgy, daring, romantic look to them…and those perfect, soft, warm, surprisingly strong and enthusiastic little lips… Oh, and… FOCUS, Helga! Come on—a mental monologue! NOW? Sheesh, why don't we just take Arnold's advice and actually have Miriam help out with carrying materials up to the attic for the next shrine! Crimeny!'
While Helga had remained facing the wall in silence, her thoughts torn between fear at the consequences of what she had just revealed to Miriam and her near Arnold monologue, Miriam, an almost disbelieving look on her face, had as well remained quiet…just continuing to watch the shape of her daughter under the covers after having delivered her speech about the true meaning of her last sarcastic 'dismissal.'
Finally, hesitantly, she opened her mouth to address Helga…
"Aw, for Pete's sake, Miriam—I'm trying to sleep, and then I'm hearing things falling on the floor and you getting stuff from the kitchen and the girl practically having a fit! What the heck are you two doing in here, anyway?"
Helga's eyes went wide and she instantly sat up to face, along with her mother, her father, who had just groggily entered the room in his pajamas.
Miriam blinked at the sight of Bob Pataki but didn't falter. She put a smile on her face and addressed her husband. "Oh, B, Helga and I were just having a little girl talk. Nothing to worry about, right, Helga?" She turned to her (very pale, all of a sudden) daughter and quickly winked at her before turning back to her husband. She then stood up and walked over to Bob, touching his shoulder. "Now, you just get back to bed, B… And don't worry about breakfast tomorrow…" She suddenly added as an afterthought, recalling Bob's complaint prior to heading to their room before about having no 'Olga breakfast' to wake him up in the morning (as well as suddenly seeming enthused again about the idea of some family bonding). "Olga left me some of her recipes and I'm sure I can get together a spread just great as one of hers if I get up early enough, so we can all have a big family breakfast together!"
Bob, with a yawn and a stretch up, raised an eyebrow at his wife's unusually cheery disposition. "Family breakfast? With just you, me and the girl?"
Miriam gave him a look and squeezed his shoulder firmly. "Bob! Remember what we were talking about with Olga…!"
"Huh?" Suddenly, Bob blinked a few times, finally shaking off his half sleep, and looked at his wife. Her stern gaze made him consider for a second and then he blinked once more as realization set in. "Oh…uh, right, right. Family breakfast with you me and Ol—uh, Helga."
And then Bob, to Helga's complete surprise (and she was already pretty surprised by hearing her actual name come out of his mouth), took another step forward and rubbed the back of his neck, looking down at the floor with a slight scowl on his face (though something about it seemed more directed to himself than to his wife or daughter). "Uh, listen, Helga…"
He cleared his throat and Helga was all ears. 'There is NO WAY he is going to give me an apology/bonding speech right now. Miriam—okay, yeah, maybe after a week of Olga being on her back she'd come back to reality and realize she's not exactly 'Mom of the Year'…but Bob…?' She scoffed. 'Yeah, maybe if Olga was behind him right now poking him with a sharp stick and threatening to drop out of college and get married again! Seriously, there is noway…'
"I…" Bob went on, letting out a breath and ending Helga's thoughts, "I was gonna bring this up to you in the morning, Helga, but…well, you're mother kind of reminded me of it just now…and since we're all awake and here and everything…" He shifted a little. "Well, like your mother said, Olga's been kind of talking to us a lot lately about some of that child development and family quanti—uh, quality time stuff… Heck, we haven't been able to get her to shut up about it ever since Monday and then don't even get me started on the drive to the airport today, heh, heh…" He tried to throw in this small joke to ease the tension, but then just swallowed nervously and continued, his wife and daughter still just watching him. "Anyway…I just, uh…well, I wanted to say I was sorry for blowing up at you in front of your friends a few weeks ago…" He rubbed the back of his neck. "I mean, Olga explained the whole misunderstanding to me, and I…uh, I just wanted you to know that I didn't mean to get upset with you and yell at you like that in the trophy room. It's just…" And then finally he let out a sigh and looked up at Helga, a bit of distress more than apparent in his eyes. "Well, sheesh, you're my daughter, Ol—uh, Helga, and when Olga told me two weeks ago that you were running off into the streets and sneaking around with some boy…I don't know…Crimeny, I worry about you, girl! I mean…I know you know how to take care of yourself—that's half the reason I always kind of leave you to do your own thing and always spend so much time making sure Olga's got everything she needs—but still…" He smiled. "Well, you're my girl, Helga, and, heck, I care about you…"
Bob's smile was sincere as was the smile of Miriam as they now stood there looking down at their youngest daughter…
…Whose jaw was practically on the floor and whose eyes were almost frighteningly wide at this point, by the way. Not a sound came out of her. 'What the…?' was all her head could even begin to think.
Several seconds of stunned silence passed during which Helga slowly but fully took in her current (totally unexpected and practically unprecedented) situation… Eventually, though, she blinked once and then managed a reply to the words of her father in a very quiet, disbelieving voice. "Okay…Wow… I think there are two possible explanations that will make everything the two of just said to me actually make sense…
Bob and Miriam just raised an eyebrow each at this response.
Helga continued. "One: Bob you got into Miriam's smoothies, and Miriam you got into…well, I don't know what it is, but I have a feeling it's illegal. Explanation two: I fell asleep watching the Cleavers and somehow got into the pork rinds again and am now having the STRANGEST dream in the world. Ever. Period." 'And you know, that one's starting to seem like a pretty solid theory—Arnold gave me an incredible kiss and left and I was so unbearably happy that I passed out and started having a dream that EVERYTHING in my life was perfect, not just the romantic part. Hey, that means Miriam doesn't know my secret! Great!' Helga was already starting to feel better. 'I'll just pinch myself and…OW!' She couldn't help but wince as she pressed a bit of skin from one of her arms between her thumb and forefinger. And then she looked out from her bed across her room, expecting to find herself alone again now that she must be awake…And yet there continued to stand Bob and Miriam…still just looking at her with a bit of puzzlement. Helga almost groaned. 'Man—What the heck is going on around here lately? Please, someone, stop the roller coaster of 'major life alterations', I want to get off!'
And then suddenly Helga came out of her melodramatic thoughts at the sound of Miriam starting to chuckle…and Bob actually starting to laugh a bit himself.
"Hey," Bob smiled in response to his daughter's 'explanations', "That wasn't half bad, Helga!"
Miriam put her hand to her mouth, still laughing. "Sweetie, where do you come up with things like that?"
'Wh-what?' Helga just blinked several times, staring at them with her head slightly tilted to the side, totally flabbergasted. 'Okay, fine, I'm not dreaming, but then…Who the… Well, darn it who the heck ARE these two?' "Okay, seriously you two—snap out of it!" she suddenly stated firmly, feeling more than a little freaked out by her parents actually…talking with her and…laughing with her…together…in…reality. She did her best to firm up her scowl as she added, "Not that this sudden parenting insight isn't…probably a good thing…But you're starting to creep me out!" She turned to her mother and then her father. "I mean, Miriam, go start the blender, and Bob call me Olga! Heck, I'll even take a trip down to the trophy room with you two to be reminded for the billionth time about how I really AM the second child in this family in every way possible! But this whole 'mutually wanting to bond forever, no strings attached' thing is starting to get 'the first third of a horror movie' creepy!" She began to gesticulate wildly as she got carried away with her thoughts. "You know, you two act all unnaturally euphoric to lull me into a false sense of security, then I fall asleep and only to wake up at 3am strapped to a table as a ritual sacrifice to the dark creature living in our basement that's turned you both into zombies!" She dropped her arms to her sides and rolled her eyes dramatically. "And with my luck the dark creature will be a possessed Olga or something!"
Finishing her little outburst and now breathing just a little heavily, Helga turned her focus back to her parents again…only to find herself even more perplexed as they just looked to each other with blank faces…and then turned back to her, suddenly laughing even harder.
Helga just rolled her eyes and sighed, throwing herself down upon her bed once more. 'Oh brother—what the heck did Olga DO to them on that car ride! And during this whole week when I wasn't around, for that matter! I know that voice of hers can be mind numbing sometimes but I didn't think it was capable of brainwashing! I mean, really—is this really Bob and Miriam…actually wanting to get to know me?" Still, despite her continued surprise and doubt…Helga couldn't deny that there was a serious smile threatening to form on her own face as well at the sight of her parents just standing there cracking up all because of a joke she'd just made. "Hey…" she turned to Bob and Miriam, letting break a half smile, and shrugged, "It could happen… I always did think there was something a little off about your first kid, you know…" She glanced down and finally chuckled to herself.
"Oh, Helga…" Miriam, getting her laughter under control, approached her daughter once again and upon reaching the edge of her bed suddenly proceeded to lean down and wrap her arms tight around Helga in a hug.
Helga blinked at the sudden gesture, her eyes going wide in surprise and almost…panic…or at the very least uncertainty about how to respond to her mother suddenly so tightly embracing her for seemingly no reason… At least before she had hugged her because of that kiss slip up, which made logical sense… But this… 'Okay, okay…just take a second and absorb things…all of these crazy, insane, very unexpected things…' Finally, Helga took a deep breath in and out and with a half smile managed to say more playfully than harshly. "Uh, Miri—Mom…what did I say about the Olga hugs cutting off all circulation?"
She heard her mother chuckle once more at the question. Miriam then let out a breath but didn't release her daughter just yet. "Oh Helga…" she began in a relieved and happy voice near her ear, "I really am sorry, honey…that you've been so unhappy with how we've treated you. And I…I'm really sorry if we ever mess up again!" she added firmly, and then swallowed and finally finished with, "But…we're really going to try this time Helga. I promise." Finally she released Helga, and took a step away from the bed, just smiling over her warmly. Helga…smiled back.
Suddenly, both mother and daughter blinked as they then heard a warm sigh come from Bob, who was still by Helga's door. "Aw, what the heck…come here you two!" And then out of nowhere he approached the bed and put one arm around Miriam and wrapped the other around Helga, and pulled them both close in a large hug!
'HUH!' came the practically panicked thought. "BOB!" Helga instantly exclaimed in total surprise, her eyes as wide as possible. "Crimeny—can you hold this pose while I go get a camera or something? Seriously…"
Bob just let out a laugh once more at the comment and looked to Helga. "Heh, you know you're pretty quick with those jokes, Helga… Get that from me!" he added proudly, standing up and finally releasing mother and daughter. "Seriously, though..." suddenly he glanced down, looking a bit sheepish and just a little guilty. He spoke in a sincere tone. "We really are gonna try and make things a little better around here…" He rolled his eyes to the side and half smiled as he continued. "I mean, if we don't I think Olga's going to actually drag Miriam and me into the trophy room for a good talking to for once, considering half the stuff she was saying in the car… But…" he shook his head to clear it and then looked to Helga again. "We're also gonna try and change a little because…well, because we want to and…well, like I said, we care about you, girl…You're important to us…" His smile increased. "And if we forget all that sometimes…well then…don't just lock yourself up here or something—use that mouth of yours to tell us to cut it out pronto! Kick, scream, rant, rave, heck—call up Olga! But don't just give up on us again because…well…" He rubbed the back of his neck and hesitated for second as though trying to find the right words. "Look, I'll admit it—your Mom and I aren't the best at all of this bonding stuff and we were always used to Olga taking the reigns with it, and it might be hard at first but the point is…we want to do it all with you too…okay?" He looked at her hopefully and then added with a laugh to lighten the tender moment, "Heck, you won't be nine forever, right?" He gave her a playful nudge in the shoulder.
Helga just gave him a bit of a look, and then replied without missing a beat, "Twelve, Bob."
Bob's eyes flew wide open. "TWELVE! When the HECK did you turn—"
Helga instantly started laughing and fell back against her pillows. 'Classic!' "Kidding, kidding, Bob—ten." With a few more chuckles she sat up, just shaking her head in amusement. "You were closer than usual that time though, I'll give you that! Birthday was about…oh…a month and a half ago." She raised part of her brow, looking first to her father and then to her mother as she continued. "Remember: you handed me one of those obsolete, 'for display purposes only', models of beeper and then went to watch TV, and you made a cake without any baking powder and baked it with the frosting already on it, and then fell asleep with your head on the counter?" Though these actions might have seemed like they deserved a bit of an acidic tone in the recounting, Helga was in fact reminding her parents of these events as casually as could be imagined. After all, after a decade she'd grown used to them happening in her life…and also, well, with all of these apparently sincere (for once) promises of turning over a new leaf, she couldn't help but feel too much pity Bob and Miriam to be too harsh with them right now. 'Stupid conscience…' Despite the thought, having it only made Helga smile just a bit more to herself…not just because it reminded her of Arnold but also because, well…it felt kind of nice to be putting trying to do the right thing over her own fears and insecurities and desire to keep herself emotionally 'safe' at all costs.
Meanwhile, upon hearing their daughter finish her explanation about her latest birthday, Bob and Miriam's eyes had gone wide and now they just looked first at each other guiltily and then back to Helga, seemingly speechless as to how to even begin to respond to what she'd just revealed about the depths of their poor parenting.
Helga, however, broke the silence rather quickly herself by just sighing patiently. She then closed her eyes and shook her head, still smiling slightly. "It's okay, it's okay—it actually turned out to be a pretty decent day anyway." She opened her eyes and rolled them to the side as she recalled the rest of her tenth birthday. "Olga sent me a really cool scarf from Alaska and Dr. Bliss gave me a book of prints of Edward Hopper paintings, and after the little 'birthday bash' here, Phoebe and I went out and blew a weeks worth of allowance at Slausen's and caught a movie." She smiled just a bit more. "And then we bumped into Arn—" Her eyes went wide and she instantly stopped and 'corrected' herself… "We bumped into Ar…a…bunch of people from my class! Yeah! And Phoebe told hi—um, them what we were celebrating and he—they wished me a happy birthday." She laughed a bit nervously at her several near slips and then cleared her throat and turned to her parents again and shrugged. "So, uh…like I said, no big deal…I'm used to it, anyway…" Still, despite the degree to which she was trying to amusingly move on from nearly bringing up Arnold, and how much she was trying to laugh things off for the 'new and improved' Bob and Miriam's sakes…she couldn't help but glance down, just a touch of sadness coming to her eyes, at the fact that she was indeed very much used to such treatment…and had been for awhile. 'Well…if they really are serious about changing, at least they can kind of use that whole mess of a day as an example of what NOT to do next year…'
And then another interesting (and very much unexpected) thing happened…
Instead of her parents apologizing once more and promising to do better before finally wishing her goodnight…Helga suddenly heard Miriam's voice say very firmly, "Oh no—it is a VERY big deal, little lady!"
"Huh?" Helga blinked, coming out of her melancholy thoughts, and looked to her mother. Her wide eyes fell upon Miriam standing before her with her arms crossed over her chest and looking down at her daughter very seriously.
And then, before she could fully process this reaction on her mother's part, the sound of Bob's voice and the slight scowl that suddenly returned to his face quickly drew Helga's eyes to him now all of a sudden. "Of course it's a big deal, Helga! Heck, if my parents had done that to me when I was your age I'd have probably set the house on fire or pulled the hose inside to flood the place or something just to get even!"
"I…I…" Once again this evening, a stunned Helga actually found herself quite speechless all of a sudden. Finally she took a quick breath as the replies of both of her parents fully sank in, and then her words started to return. "Well…" she began, her scowl returning slightly, "I made a choice wisecrack or two as I left here that day but once again…" And this time, despite wanting to encourage their newfound desires to be decent parents, Helga glared at Bob and then Miriam as she continued, "Someone was too busy with the TV and someone else was too busy being passed out to notice! So I just bailed!" She crossed her arms over her chest and added with a touch less anger and a touch more frustration and hurt, "Easier that way… I mean, trying to get you two to actually care would've taken all day and I at least wanted to have time for some actual birthday fun, you know?"
Miriam sighed and knelt down, looking at her daughter sincerely. "Helga…listen to me. We know, and you should too, that it's not your responsibility to make sure we're loving you right. You're job is just to be ten. That's it." She smiled, and then put a hand atop one of Helga's, causing Helga to blink and bring her eyes up to her mother's. "But, like your father said…" Miriam continued with a smile, "Even though we're going to be trying our hardest, it might be hard for us to change so much so quickly… So if you ever do think we're slipping or messing up…even though you shouldn't have to…we'd appreciate any kind of nudge in the right direction you'd be willing to give us…" Miriam looked at her hopefully.
Helga just remained looking at Miriam for a second, her eyes once again wide in surprise…and then she turned her sights to Bob almost as if to confirm this statement of her mother's.
At his daughter's gaze, Bob glanced away guiltily. "She's right, Helga. I mean…" Then he looked to the ten-year-old girl, scowling slightly, "Seriously, though—DON'T set the house on fire! We've still got eight more years of payments on the place…" He cleared his throat, his face softening again. "But…well, I'm sure that I'm overdue for a few well deserved angry rants from you in front of the TV, if you know what I mean..." He glanced at her sheepishly.
Helga, meanwhile, just raised an eyebrow at his statement…and then she couldn't help half smiling and glancing back and forth from Bob to Miriam with what actually appeared to be excitement in her eyes. 'Well, I'll be…' Finally, she spoke, her smile only growing. "You two knuckleheads are really serious, aren't you? I mean…me forgiving you and us actually not hating each other for once is really important to you…isn't it? You actually CARE if it happens or not…" She couldn't keep the wonder out of her voice.
Miriam, a purely happy expression finally returning to her face, held up one of her hands in a pledge-like manner. "You have our words, Helga."
A second passed and then she nudged Bob, who turned to his wife and blinked, seeing her hand raised so officially… And then he held up one of his hands too and turned back to Helga. "Oh, uh, yeah—scouts honor!"
Miriam smiled at his agreement with her, and then turned back to her daughter. She leaned over slightly, looking into Helga's smiling eyes. "And to start things off right, how about you tell us whatever you really wanted for your birthday and we'll make it happen, no matter what it is!"
Helga blinked...and her jaw dropped. "Wait…Seriously?" She glanced back and forth in disbelief from Miriam to Bob. Sure, she'd gotten empty promises from them in the past about wanting to 'turn over a new leaf'…but never action!
"Sure, why the heck not?" asked Bob with a smile. He crossed his arms over his chest. "Heck, the Beeper Emporium's been doing pretty well and Olga's graduating in a few months so there's no more student loans to deal with besides the ones we've already got to pay off… So, shoot, girl! Whatever you want!"
Helga smiled to herself, and put a hand to her chin…and seriously considered for several seconds (as thoughts of total world domination couldn't help but flash into her head). "You know…" she managed to mumble with a slight laugh between daydreams, her grin turning very sly, "Giving a ten year old this much power over your actions is a little dangerous… And I'm pretty creative and just a little greedy…" She looked to them again. "Are you sure it's 'anything I want'…?"
Miriam just put her hands on her hips and a bit of a challenging look flashed into her eyes as she replied firmly and with a smile, "Give us your best shot, little lady!"
Helga let out a sigh at this confirmation of her total control over the situation, and then considered for just a second more. Finally, she turned her gaze back to her parents once again, having finally settled on something in her mind…or actually several things… "Okay…there's a few things I can think of, I guess…" She cleared her throat, and then began to list her 'demands', speaking in a very firm tone, though her grin remained. "One…I want my curfew extended to ten instead of nine. I'm not getting any younger and I have places to be and people to see and nine's not cutting it anymore…" She crossed her arms over her chest, awaiting a response. 'Moment of truth, I guess…' she couldn't help but think with a mental sigh… 'Either they'll actually give me what I want like they're promising or they'll go back to doing what's easier for them…'
At this unusual belated birthday present request from their daughter, Bob and Miriam looked to each other in confusion for a second or two…but then suddenly a slight look of realization came to Miriam's eyes and she smiled, turning to her daughter. "Okay, Helga…I think that's fair. You deserve to spend a little more time with your friends… Just as long as you tell one of us where you're going and who you're going to be with, ten o'clock it is!" She glanced at her husband. "As long as you're okay with it too, B…"
"Hmm?" Miriam almost had to chuckle at the still slightly confused look on her husband's face. Finally, though, Bob just shrugged and then looked to his wife. "Uh…sure. Sounds good to me, I guess…" He smiled at Helga. "No problem!"
Helga smiled back, happy both that her request had been approved (a sign in favor of Bob and Miriam's sudden desire to change as parents being genuine) and that Miriam (who, from the look on her face, had obviously realized the 'truer' (more Arnold-based) purpose behind her daughter wanting to stay out a bit later) thankfully hadn't spilled the beans about her new little 'boyfriend' to her father. On a side note, in regards to the first source of Helga's relief, not that her nine o'clock curfew had ever really been strictly enforced thanks to a certain degree of neglect from her mother and father, but Helga had intelligently figured that if Bob and Miriam were serious about being better parents they might start cracking down a bit on 'the rules' so… 'Might as well get some insurance for future dates with my perfect little love god…'
Doing her best not to giggle at the amount of future fun she had just guaranteed for herself with Arnold, Helga cleared her throat again and came back to the situation at hand...and to her other birthday demands. "Okay, great…thanks, guys…" Her sly grin returned and she rubbed her hands together. "Alright, so, present number two…" She sighed mentally and couldn't help but think sarcastically, 'Oh boy—this one should be fun…' "I'd like to have a friend over tomorrow night for dinner…" She scowled slightly. "And I'd like him to NOT be insanely interrogated this time…Bob!" She looked specifically at her father.
Bob blinked once or twice at being so suddenly and harshly addressed. He even raised an eyebrow in confusion…but then a look of realization came to his face (as well as a slight scowl, himself). "Wait…do you mean that kid with the weird-shaped head who Olga said you were sneaking out to meet two weeks ago?"
Helga felt herself swallow hard with nervousness, though she did her best to maintain her serious and commanding face as she replied firmly, "Yes, Bob! The really nice boy who Olga later explained I was just tutoring…and who's one of my best friends…and…" she had to take a deep breath, but she finally managed to add, "And who I like a lot…and who likes me despite you and Miriam and Olga practically diving down his throat the last time he was here!" She looked Bob square in the eye and finally summarized simply, "I want him to come over to eat and I want us to have a nice family dinner and I DON'T want any blustery side comments or angry looks or accusatory questions… Got it?" Helga knew she was coming off as defensive…probably too defensive to not arouse suspicions about just how strong her feelings were for her 'friend' Arnold…but still she was determined to put her foot down about this here and now. The two of them were dating and she wasn't about to have the love of her life finally love her back only to not be able to just stop by her freaking house every once in a while without a major scene taking place! 'Okay, yeah—I get that Bob and Miriam might have just been trying to be protective on top of being overbearing during that whole tutoring thing…But that's all over now and enough is enough, and if Arnold and me can eat dinner at his house whenever we want then we should be able to eat at my house without a problem too!'
And indeed Helga, upon finishing her rant, just continued to stare down Bob in an effort to make her request and how seriously she meant it stick…and Bob, to her interest and slight worry, continued to stare her down a bit as well…torn between a scowl and a raised eyebrow at what she was asking.
'And please don't let him ask if me and Arnold are dating…PLEASE don't let him ask if me and Arnold are dating! Miriam and Olga knowing is bad enough but if he does too my life is going to go from bearably chaotic to full on nightmare! There won't be any peace for me from the annoying side comments in this whole freaking house!" Helga could feel her heart pounding warmly against the cool metal of her locket, still hanging against her chest.
Miriam, meanwhile, had just been watching this exchange between father and daughter unfold with quite a bit of interest…and just a touch of concern now as silence still remained between them. Indeed, she was about to open her mouth to try and smooth things over between Bob and Helga once more…
…When suddenly (or rather finally) Bob cleared his throat and spoke. "Ol—uh, Helga…" His scowl faltered and he glanced down, rubbing the back of his neck. "Look now…I get what you're asking but I just don't understand how this kid is so important to you all of a sudden! I mean, why—"
"Uh-bup-bup!" Helga raised a hand and instantly cut him off…and went with the only thing she could come up with on such short notice in response to her father (inevitably, as she had predicted) questioning her and Arnold's newfound 'very close' friendship. She looked to Bob, her scowl continuing. "I said no accusatory questions, and that applies to both me and Arnold, now and in the future…and that was coming dangerously close to one, Bob!" She crossed her arms over her chest and did her best to state bluntly and simply, once and for all, "I like him, he's nice, and I'm inviting him over for dinner, and I want you and Miriam to treat him just as nice as you keep swearing you're going to be treating me from now on, okay?" She raised part of her brow at him, waiting for a reply. 'Wow, if it's this much of a struggle to get him to have the little shrimp over for a civil dinner, think how ridiculous it's going to be trying to announce the marriage to him in another ten years or so…'
"Mmm…" Bob glanced away, still looking and sounding a bit frustrated. "Well…"
Suddenly, Miriam stepped toward him and put a hand on his shoulder. She smiled at him as he turned to look at her. "Oh, B, he's just a nice little ten-year-old boy…" she began soothingly.
Bob crossed his arms over his chest, scowling slightly again, and actually muttered under his breath in response, "Yeah, well…in case you forgot from Olga, Miriam, nice ten-year-old boys grow into not-so-nice fifteen-year-old boys pretty quickly…"
At this observation, Helga lost her scowl and felt a quick blush come to her face…especially as an echo of the term she'd coined earlier that evening for the more 'adventurous' aspects of Arnold's personality entitled 'Arnold's dark side', came to mind… She swallowed hard. 'Heh, heh…I think I might have given old Football Head a head start on whatever the heck Bob's talking about…' She sighed mentally and couldn't help but smile a bit more to herself as her amusing thoughts continued, 'That little shrimp is gonna turn out to be a handful as a boyfriend, isn't he?'
Miriam, meanwhile, just sighed and rolled her eyes at her husband's comment and continued in a firm voice, squeezing Bob's shoulder just a bit harder. "He's just a nice little ten-year-old boy…" she repeated firmly, "And your daughter wants to have him over for Sunday dinner. It's not like she's…sneaking him into her room or anything." Her smile grew a bit more at this little addition…and it wasn't lost on a suddenly very pale Helga.
And indeed, upon detecting the slight extra smirk that suddenly came to Miriam's mouth as she finished making this last comment, Helga could feel her heart instantly pick up speed…pounding away once again against her locket, and this time almost as hard as when Arnold had leaned her back for that kiss before... 'She doesn't…' her panicked thoughts raced, 'She couldn't know he was here…up here…There's…there's NO way…right?' She swallowed hard…not even daring to think of the consequences if Miriam indeed had some kind of way of knowing the events between her daughter and a certain young boy that had actually taken place in the Pataki residence during the last few hours…
While Helga's fears mounted, Bob took a deep breath at this reassurance from his wife…and then finally agreed in a resigned but sincere voice. "Yeah, I guess so…" He looked to Helga, still sounding a bit hesitant though seeming much more reasonable as he nodded to his younger daughter and finally announced, "Okay, invite him over…" A touch more calmness began to come to his tone as he continued with, "After all, I mean…it's just one dinner and we'll all be there, so…"
"AND…" Helga suddenly cut him off, however, now scowling once again and putting the 'Miriam possibly knowing Arnold had been in her room' thing on the backburner for now. "And after dinner…" she continued, "We're going to go out and get some ice cream or catch a movie or something—just me and Arnold. And as long as I'm back by ten I don't want to hear a word about it!" She looked at her father firmly and finally stated with just a touch of defiance, anticipating his potential problem with this situation, "I can hang out with whoever I want to and tomorrow night I want to hang out with him! Case closed." 'Well, there we go—all of my chips are on the table and it's sink or swim time... Let's see if this works or if I'm pushing things too far and need to at least continue keeping my dates with the little Football head a secret from these two…'
Bob blinked at this little addition to his daughter's 'birthday present'… Instantly, his scowl was back in full force. "Hey, now, wait a minu—"
"Now, B!" Miriam quickly interjected, removing her hand from his shoulder and suddenly stepping right in front of him, looking at him and shrugging with a smile on her face, "We did say ten o'clock for her new curfew, and she is letting us know where she's going and who she's going with in advance…"
Bob paused and blinked at his wife's logic, his mouth half open. "But…"
"Bob…" However, Miriam just continued to give him a look…knowing full well he couldn't deny the logic of her argument.
Finally, after another second or two, Bob blinked once again, glanced down in thought…and then finally looked up and announced with a frustrated sigh, "Oh…fine…I guess…." He looked past Miriam at Helga, a weak scowl still present. "But I want you on those front steps at 9:59 sharp, little missy—alone and ready to get inside and get to bed! I mean…" he glanced down sheepishly, "It's not safe for a kid to be running around this city at night. And…" He seemed to consider for another second, and then suddenly blinked once more and looked back to Helga. "And just so we can always reach you even when you're out with Alfred…"
"Arnold, Dad." Helga corrected him politely but firmly, doing her best to maintain her cool while at the same time still feeling a nervous wreck inside about first having had to wrangle the Arnold situation with her mother and now finishing up trying to do it with her father.
"Fine, yeah—Arnold…" Bob replied, and then continued on, "Anyway, just so we know that you're safe and we can reach you, I'm taking back that crummy beeper I gave you last month and we're getting you set up with one of the Emporium's top of the line cell phones—capiche?" He looked at her sternly.
Helga blinked, her eyes going wide at yet another out of the blue occurrence this evening… 'Did he just say…' She smiled. "Uh…did you just say you want to give me a cell phone, Bob?" She almost had to laugh at the very notion…and at the idea that he would state it as though she would have some kind of problem with it… "Uh, yeah, sure…go for it! I've got no problem with even more free stuff as part of the deal..." She grinned a bit to herself, glancing down...and then couldn't resist the temptation to add… "I might have to turn it off when Arnold and I in the theatre together tomorrow night, though, of course… You know…just so it doesn't go off and ruin things…"
"You'll put it on vibrate and answer it if one of us calls…" Bob quickly announced back to her.
Helga just sighed and rolled her eyes at the reply, and almost chuckled...a small surge of happiness suddenly rising up inside of her. "Oh, fine—I GUESS I can live with that…" 'He really actually cares about whether or not I'm safe…I mean, I'm going to have to put in some overtime making him realize that I really can handle myself, especially when it comes to boys, just like I had to prove to Arnoldo tonight…But all that aside he really does care…and so does she…' Her eyes fell to Miriam once again for a moment, who was doing her best not to chuckle at Bob's little outburst herself. Helga just shook her head in amusement. 'Who knew?' Despite the fact that it was a rhetorical question…she couldn't help the answer of 'Olga' popping into her mind…
While Helga had been having been reflecting on the surprising and amusing events of the last half hour or so, Bob finally took a breath as Helga's agreement with his condition sank in, and the scowl began to leave his face. "Okay…" He inhaled once more and then, with a much calmer face and tone, looked at Helga again. "So…" he crossed his arms over his chest and half smiled, "Anything else to make up for the birthday thing…?"
The grin returned to Helga's face at the question….And then she swallowed and took a deep breath and mustered all of her courage to ask as casually as possible, glancing down all the while… "Uh…yeah, actually…" 'Okay, Helga, just go for it! It's not going to seem suspicious…not even to Miriam… There's a slight chance she knows Arnold was up here but there's no way she knows EVERYTHING about it!' With these reassuring thoughts, Helga then glanced innocently up at her father and mother…and continued… "I know this one might take a while…but…"
And then Helga continued with her explanation of her third gift…
"So, how about it…?" Helga shrugged innocently. "Any chance of getting something like that on top of the curfew and the dinner tomorrow and the bonus cell phone?" She smiled up at her parents, still trying to seem as casual as possible…despite her still quite quickly beating heart just pounding nervously away in her chest… 'It's okay, it's not suspicious…It'll be suspicious, though, if you let yourself get all worked up and start blushing like crazy and sweating bullets! Just keep it casual, Helga…Keep it casual…'
Bob and Miriam just looked at each other, both seemingly genuinely confused by the third and final birthday gift request their daughter had just made… Even Miriam failed to suddenly get some kind of look of realization like she had with the curfew thing despite the passing seconds, much to Helga's relief. 'Okay, see, I KNEW I was probably reading way too much into that comment of hers about Arnold being in my room…Whew—just a coincidence!' Helga had to smile at the thought of being in the clear about THAT potential most-awkward-situation-ever.
"Well…what do you think, B?" Miriam finally asked her husband, still sounding clueless.
Bob just rubbed the back of his neck and considered for a second longer. "Well…honestly, it wouldn't be too much trouble…I could probably put it together myself and it shouldn't cost too much… It'd just be a matter of me finding a free weekend to work on it…" He looked to his daughter, more than a bit of puzzlement still on his face. "Are you sure that's the last thing you want for your birthday, though, Helga? No tickets to anything or video games or party…just that?"
Helga shrugged and glanced to the side. "Well, like you said, Bob, I'm getting older, and so I just figured this place could use a few changes…" She gave him a half grin. "I mean, I would have asked for my own phone line or something but you already kind of took care of that with the cell phone so…just moving down to number two on the list…" She continued just innocently looking at him.
At this reply Bob sighed and then smiled back at his daughter. "Okay, Helga…I'll see what I can do."
"Thanks…Dad…" She smiled just a bit more fully and sincerely at him. 'I think…I think that this is the first birthday I can remember where I'm actually getting everything I asked for…And voluntarily!' She almost chuckled. 'Heh…' a few of her birthday present daydreams from before flashed through Helga's head, 'Maybe I really should have asked for full control of the Beeper Empire's funds to begin my plans for total nation-wide political and financial domination…'
While Helga was doing her best not to chuckle at the thoughts passing through her head and Bob was just smiling at how happy she seemed, Miriam couldn't help but grin at the sight of yet another nice exchange going on between her husband and her daughter, and was about to open her mouth to comment on the sight when she suddenly found herself yawning. She glanced over to Helga's nightstand and blinked at the time she saw on the clock. "B—it's already almost 11!"
Bob's eyes went wide at this information and he turned first to the clock and then to Miriam. "11?" He blinked. "Huh—Olga didn't say all this family talking would make the time go so fast..." And then suddenly he found himself stretching up and yawning as well as how late it was really sunk in. "Now that you mention it, though, I really could stand to hit the sack..." He looked from his wife to his daughter, his eyelids drooping a little but a smile still on his face. "Well, I guess we can talk more again in the morning during breakfast or something…"
Miriam smiled at the excellent suggestion. "That sounds good to me…" And then her eyes lit up as a thought occurred to her. "Oh and it's Sunday tomorrow, Bob…" She put a hand on his shoulder. "Since you don't have work maybe we could all go to a movie together or something…I hear there's a new romantic comedy out that—"
"Romantic comedy! Sheesh—give me a monster movie any day!"
Helga and Bob each opened their eyes wide as they realized that they had both just said this exact same sentence at the exact same time…in unison.
Father and daughter remained staring forward in a bit of shock for another second.
And then finally they just looked to each other…and suddenly burst into mutual laughter.
After several seconds, Helga finally got herself under control enough to suggest between laughs, "Hey—maybe we should check out Rats again, huh, Bob?"
Bob only laughed even harder, barely finding the capacity to reply to the comment, "Heh, I almost forgot about that…!"
At the sight of the other two members of her family so thoroughly enjoying themselves, despite their obvious preference against her movie suggestion, Miriam could only smile and sigh and roll her eyes. "Okay, you two…" she put a hand on each other their shoulders, trying to stifle some chuckles herself, "Why don't we compromise and go to an action movie or something?"
Helga just shrugged at Miriam, still smiling. "Hey, whatever floats your boat…" Suddenly, she found herself yawning as well and laid back on her bed and pillow, pulling the blankets up around her body. "Besides, I'll probably want to save the monster movie for tomorrow night with old Football Head…" She felt her eyes closing with sleepiness. "He likes things like that…"
Bob and Miriam couldn't help but suddenly blink and raise an eyebrow each. "Football Head?" they asked in unison.
Helga blinked and then her eyes fluttered open once more. She sat up a bit and looked to them with a slight smile. "Oh…uh, yeah—that's…kind of one of my…uh… 'nicknames' for Arnold. You know—because of the 'head' thing…" She spread her arms wide out around her head in imitation of Arnold's own wide cranium. "I mean, he's also geekbait and shrimp and paste for brains…but Football Head's kind of my default, you know?" She crossed her arms over her chest and laid back once again against her pillows.
At this explanation, Bob just scratched his head while Miriam considered for a second and then put her hand to her mouth, doing her best to hide a slight smile and giggle.
Helga yawned to herself once more and then closed her eyes again. "Well, goodnight you two—see you in the morning..." She raised one of her hands and gave her parents a slight wave goodbye, and added with again, "That is, unless the pod people return to claim you and bring my real parents back from planet Xanadu." She laughed slightly to herself at the joke.
At the same time, though, despite this humorous and seemingly casual goodnight to Bob and Miriam, Helga couldn't help crossing her fingers under the blankets and thinking as hard as possible to herself, 'Okay, so Arnold coming here and kissing the heck out of me because he loves me so much and thinks I'm so wonderful and beautiful and because it's our one week anniversary wasn't a dream… Well then—okay, I know it's a lot to ask on top of that but please, PLEASE, no matter what I was saying before, don't let this be a dream either! I don't even care anymore that it means Miriam found my locket…heck, I'll even lead her on a stroll up to the shrine if that's what it takes! But just please don't let this be a dream—please let me be this lucky…because if this really is all just a lot of talk…' Helga almost felt herself cringe at the very notion…the notion that Bob and Miriam really would just go back to what was easier for them with no Olga around to keep them in line…all because it had always seemed that something about her—about Helga—had just never been enough for them.
But still now they were both, together, admitting that it was their fault—they were saying that they'd been the ones to mess up, not her…and that they were willing to really try if she was really willing to try. And so, keeping all of this in mind, Helga let her thought finish… all the while clinging to the last hour of genuine talking with her parents and everything it meant. 'If this really is all a lot of talk…then I just don't think I'll ever be able to try again with them… I mean, even I can only take so much abuse…' Then suddenly memories about Phoebe and Olga and of course her beloved Arnold, among other people, quickly resurfaced in her mind as she assured herself, 'I know I can get through this if it's not for real but…' She felt her smile grow at the thought of all the hope that this evening…and especially this last week…had recently imbibed her with. 'But it's nice feeling like I have a real Mom and Dad for once…' She crossed her fingers just a bit more tightly. 'Please let me be lucky enough to have everything stay this good in my life! Please!'
Helga, who had almost been drifting off to sleep between her consuming, heavy thoughts, her general tiredness and the fact that she was laying down with her eyes closed in her warm bed, suddenly blinked a few times and came a bit back to reality at the sound of Bob and Miriam laughing at the joke she'd just made about them. Still, despite being brought a little bit back to wakefulness, Helga just let out a yawn and closed her eyes once more. She heard Bob speak. "Well, come on, Miriam, let's get some sleep already."
"You…go on ahead B…" Miriam's slightly hesitant voice came to her ears, "I just want to say one more quick thing to Helga…"
This statement made Helga's ears prick up and her formerly heavy eyelids open. She shifted her gaze to the side and glanced over at her father who now stood near her doorway, wearing a somewhat confused expression on his face.
"Just a little more girl talk, B…" Miriam quickly explained, and then Helga's eyes fell to the smiling form of her mother glancing over her shoulder at Bob. "I'll be in in a few minutes…and don't worry—we won't wake you again…" she reassured him.
Helga watched as Bob just shrugged and yawned once more, sleep finally overcoming his curiosity. "Okay, Miriam…I'll leave the bedroom light on for you…"
And with that he left Helga's room, closing the door behind him and Miriam just watched him go with that warm (though arguably somewhat sly) smile still upon her face.
The older woman let out breath at her husband's departure and then turned back to her daughter's bed. She was expecting to have her eyes fall upon Helga's already half asleep form, upon which she would go and gently fully wake her once more to say a few quick (though important, if what she thought might be going on was indeed going on in terms of that Arnold boy) parting words to her before getting to sleep herself…
So Miriam was a little surprised, to say the least, when she turned around to instead see Helga sitting up and looking fully alert, glancing at her nervously and twiddling her thumbs.
Miriam blinked but before she could say anything Helga spoke. "Too much with practically saying I was going out on a date with the little Football Head after asking to have him over for dinner here?" she asked sincerely.
Miriam turned her head slightly to the side, looking at her younger daughter with a touch of curiosity before then smiling at her and crossing her arms over her chest at how frank she was suddenly being about this whole thing. "Uh…no, no…I think that was more than fair." Miriam almost chuckled. "It was a little sneaky getting your curfew extended first but I think it was okay too…" Her smile pulled up a bit on one side. "The comment about turning off the phone at the movie theatre might have been a little much for your father, though…"
Helga actually smiled and shrugged. "Hey, just having a little fun with him…"
Miriam chuckled slightly to herself and then approached her daughter's bed, sitting on the edge once more that evening. She took a breath and smiled at Helga...and at how much more relaxed she now seemed about talking about this whole boyfriend thing: no more desperate groans or hiding under the covers or defensive denials… "You really like this little boy, don't you, Helga?"
Helga blushed just slightly and shifted uncomfortably at the question…though a half smile remained on her face, much to Miriam's happiness.
And, indeed, just as Miriam had been noting to herself, Helga had officially decided to abandon her former dramatics and anger about the fact that her secret had been blown once again. 'What the heck—she knows. Denying it at this point would just be ridiculous… Might as well stop Arnold during our next kiss and tell him that just for the record I hate him, and expect him to buy it…' She almost chuckled as she had to add as an afterthought, 'Although with how dense he can be sometimes…' She smiled a bit more, her thoughts continuing. 'And besides…Miriam's actually being kind of helpful about this whole thing…Heck, she even got Bob to agree to half the stuff I asked for before. And anyway I think we all know that I'm going to be talking to Olga at some point about me and Arnold and that Olga's then going to be talking to Miriam at some point about me and Arnold, so maybe I should just cut out the middle man… At least it'll get rid of the fifty million embellishments I'm sure Olga would add about just how 'adorable and precious and scrumptious' the two of us are.' She recalled some of these adjectives her sister had been using for the past week about her baby sister and her little boyfriend, and almost shook her head in amusement.
"Helga…?" Miriam's prompting voice brought the ten-year-old blonde out of her thoughts.
"Huh?" Helga blinked and paused for just one more second to recall Miriam's question and then to muster her courage to answer it. She swallowed hard and finally spoke. "Y-yeah, Miri—Mom…I…I do...like him. A lot." And then, with a breath…and a serious bit of bravery considering the fears that had controlled her for so much of her past…Helga slowly reached up…and pulled a familiar golden chain from around her neck…sliding her Arnold locket out of her nightshirt.
Cupping the small object in her hands, Helga observed her beloved's face looking back at her for several seconds and couldn't help but smile at it herself in return, as she had always done ever since she could remember... Eventually, she continued speaking in a quiet, happy voice, still just gazing at the picture in her locket. "He's a very…very special person to me. He always has been…and like I said before he's not just the first boy…he's the only boy. He's my Football Head…and now he likes me too." Suddenly, Helga blinked and felt herself blushing as she quickly recalled that she was indeed saying all of this stuff to her mother...to Miriam. She shrugged and tried to finish with a slight (if not entirely false) joke, gently placing the locket in front of herself upon her bed. "Guess you could say I'm practically 'in love' with the big lug."
Finally, with a deep breath, Helga looked to Miriam, awaiting her reaction to this admission.
Helga had to blink as her eyes fell upon her mother just sitting there and looking at her with a curious expression. The older woman, now that her daughter had finished, glanced for a moment down at the Arnold locket now lying out before them, and then looked back to Helga and just observed her for several seconds more before finally opening her mouth and saying with just a touch of disbelief…and awe, "You…you really are different from Olga…aren't you, Helga?"
It took Helga a second to process the response to her admission of love. And then she just smiled and rolled her eyes at Miriam's chosen reply. "Hel-lo—isn't that what this whole 'Helga we recognize you as an individual and want to be better parents to you' thing was all about just now?" She rested back on her arms and almost chuckled. "Crimeny, Miriam—I could have told you I was different from Olga! No way it should have taken Arnold to make that fact apparent."
Miriam shared a small laugh with her daughter. "Yes, I guess you're right, sweetie..." But then a touch of guilt came back to her face as she added quietly, "Sorry again…"
Helga just shook her head in amusement and lay fully back on her bed once more. "Oh for Pete's sake, Miriam, tell Bob I said to quit apologizing already and, the two of you, just…do better from now on! Okay? I mean…" she shrugged, "You can't change the past, so just try working on things that are happening right now, you know? And don't worry…" she winked, "If I even think you're starting to slip and mess up, BELIEVE ME, I'll drag you two into that trophy room for a Helga G. Pataki lecture so fast that all of Bob's beepers will be ten seconds behind from the speed!" She smiled even more. "AND I'll get Olga on the phone and put it on speaker just so we've got a fair fight—two fixing two!"
Miriam laughed, the guilt melting from her face, leaving only that happy look once more. "Okay, Helga…no more apologizing—just doing better!" She winked.
"Hey, that's all I ask!" Helga reassured her with a chuckle.
Miriam just smiled at her daughter and was about to open her mouth to say something…when suddenly she found herself yawning once again. She stretched and stood up. "Well, I guess I'll head to bed, Helga… Goodnight…" She turned to walk toward the door.
Helga pulled the covers up snugly around her once more, this time to be warm as opposed to hide from embarrassment. "Goodnight, Mom."
And with one final yawn Helga was about to reach up to turn off the lamp on her nightstand and finally get some much deserved rest… when suddenly she paused as Miriam stopped just before reaching her door, turned back, smiling, and added as she recalled her initial intentions with remaining with her daughter for a few more minutes this evening, "Oh and Helga…?"
"Uh…yeah?" Helga asked, her hand on the lamp switch and part of her brow raised.
Miriam let out a breath. Her smile grew just a bit. "Wherever Arnold's hiding in here, tell him to wait a few minutes until your father's asleep before he sneaks out the front door…okay?"
It took a second for this sentence to process with Helga…And when it did her jaw dropped and she looked at her mother with wide eyes, blushing furiously. "MOM!"
Miriam just laughed to herself and gave her daughter a look, crossing her arms over her chest. "Oh come on, now, Helga—that flimsy excuse about getting ice cream from the Jollie Ollie man, the way you wouldn't let me in here before when I knocked and then made sure to lock the door behind you when you said you were going to bed…" She chuckled once more. "Olga's horrible at lying and even she used to do better than that… Is he in the closet?" Miriam began to eagerly approach said location.
Helga instantly flew up out of her bed, dashed across her room, and splayed herself in front of the closet door, breathing heavily. "MIRIAM—he's NOT here!" She glanced around nervously and quickly added, her heart racing, "Okay, yes, I'll admit, he came over here while you guys were out—he wanted to drop off something for our, uh, our…" Helga felt herself stuttering in embarrassment over the words but she knew the only way out of this mistake of her mothers (while at the same time not letting her see the actual contents of the closet which included a mass of pink books full of Arnold poems, the mini Arnold Helga shrine bottles, other assorted Arnold paraphernalia, and the attic door to her shrine which for all she knew Arnold could have left open) was to let her have as much of the truth as possible (or, at least, the PG version of the truth).
Helga cleared her throat and took a breath, and finally managed to continue. "He…wanted to drop off something for our…one week anniversary…" 'Oh Crimeny, I can't believe I'm actually saying this…' "But…but then I pulled hi—I mean, I asked him in and we talked for a while and…" She could feel warmth flooding her face but tried to ignore it and say anything so long as it would convince her mother of the truthful fact that Arnold wasn't in the closet while at the same time not giving away too much about the actual intensity of their relationship. "And…okay, look, maybe he actually did come up to my room just for a few minutes so we could talk about some things…which isn't really a big deal, though, since I spend practically every weekend hanging out in his room…" Her eyes instantly went wide at what she'd just admitted and she looked to her mother. "I-I mean…we spend time at other places too—we don't just sit alone in his room all day together or anything…and we'd go other places in his house when we're there but there's a ton of boarders and his grandparents so it's just more private up there…" She felt panic well up inside of herself and her heart begin to pound in her ears as she quickly tried to now fix THIS little slip. "NOT that we really need privacy for anything, heh, heh…but…uh…" Helga could practically feel herself sweating and Miriam was just watching her with amused interest, as she had been ever since her younger daughter had thrown herself in front of her closet to start on this explanation of her actions. 'Oh man, but none of this still even explains why I wouldn't let her in before…Uh…uh…' Helga wracked her brain for some kind of salvation…
Finally, though, Miriam watched as Helga suddenly let out a deep breath and just, well…gave up. 'Oh, why fight it…' And with one final breath the young blonde brought her arms down from blocking the door, leaned back against the entrance to her closet, and then brought up her right elbow to rest in her left palm and put her right hand against her temple. She spoke in a level, quiet and somewhat defeated voice, and started with a much-needed sigh. "Look, Miriam…I'm just going to level with you right now…which is something I don't normally do but I'm tired and I just don't have a clever scheme to get out of this one coming to mind, so here it goes…" She swallowed and then looked up at her mother and spoke earnestly. "Arnold's not in here, and I mean ANYWHERE in my room or this house—you have my word about that… And also all that stuff about our anniversary was true, though if you could do me a favor and forget all of those embarrassing things I mentioned about our 'dating habits', I wouldn't exactly complain about it…" She glanced down nervously. "Anyway…I didn't let you in right away when you and Bob came home before because…I had to clean some things up…and I don't want you looking in the closet right now because that's where I tossed these…um…things…which, coincidentally, are related to all of this Arnold stuff…" She swallowed hard. "And I'd appreciate it if I could keep them to myself for now… I mean…" Helga managed to glance up at Miriam again, "You already saw the locket and I personally think it's a miracle that that didn't make me go toss myself in front of a bus, but you've got to give me time with everything else. I'm not the best at handling public change, especially when it comes to this—just ask Arnold." She almost smiled to herself. And then she took one more calming breath and looked her mother in the eye once more. "So, please, for tonight, just take my word for it that Arnold's safely tucked in his bed at home and that I'm just trying to keep from pushing mild embarrassment to total and irreparable mortification tonight, okay?" She crossed her arms over her chest and blushed a bit more as she finished. "I mean, I know we're trying to be open and honest and everything now but…you're still my MOM…and this all feels really weird for me, okay?"
Having finished this speech, Helga now just continued to stand firmly in front of the closet, awaiting her mother's response…her thoughts secretly racing. 'I NEED to get all those poetry books and the other stuff hidden away and the entrance to the shrine locked and bolted first thing in the morning before she starts snooping! Sheesh, this closet's basically a doorway into the most intimate reaches of my soul right now! And my mother wants in! That CANNOT be a good situation!'
Miriam, meanwhile, upon absorbing the last of her daughter's explanation about her behavior this evening and Arnold's whereabouts, just continued watching Helga with interest for several seconds longer, her arms still crossed over her chest and that amused and intrigued grin still on her face…until eventually she just let out a breath, holding up her arms in defeat. "Okay, Helga, you win—I believe that Arnold's not here anymore and I'll leave you and the closet alone…" She crossed her arms over her chest again and sighed. "You're right—you already did open up more than I probably deserved tonight and I should just be grateful for that."
Helga breathed out a sigh of relief, and a grateful smile came to her face.
With a slight chuckle at this response, Miriam just turned and began to head toward her daughter's bedroom door again. However, a final thought coming to her mind, she paused once more in mid reach for the doorknob and turned around once again. "But, just for the future…if Arnold ever is up here when your father gets home and you're trying to hide the poor boy and acting as nervous as you did tonight about a few little keepsakes, don't hide him in the closet…" Miriam closed her eyes, shaking her head with a half smile like she was recalling something. "Your father found two boys in your sister's closet over the years and it didn't end very well for either of the poor things. Just…hide him under the bed or something and then call me or Olga and we'll see what we can do about getting him out of the house WITHOUT any permanent mental scarring…" She laughed to herself again as she continued to recall some of the incidents her first daughter's adolescence had put her and her husband through.
Helga's eyes instantly went wide. Her mouth flew open wide in shock. "OLGA…did WHAT?" she managed to squeak out in a totally floored voice.
Miriam opened her eyes and smiled at the exclamation. "Well, of course, Helga—she was a young lady once too, you know…"
Helga blinked, the look of disbelief still on her face. "I-I know but…" She still seemed to be having some trouble comprehending this sudden revelation. "But Olga…Olga's WAY too perfect and too much of a goodie two shoes to try something like that!" She looked to her mother in astonishment. "I couldn't even believe it when she had that Doug LeSham guy stay in the guest room down the hall when they were engaged!"
Miriam just sighed and replied with an all-knowing look, "Well, Helga, even the most 'perfect, goodie two shoes' person in the world can act a little different when they're a bit in love..."
She winked and Helga, despite feeling a slight blush creeping into her cheeks again, couldn't help the half grin growing on her face at the statement her mother had just made…and at how certain events from earlier this evening had already proven the observation more than true to her. "I…I guess you're right…" She glanced away, almost giggling a bit as thoughts of her beloved in love with her flashed through her mind.
Miriam, despite still trying to smile supportively at her daughter's agreement, couldn't help but suddenly find herself yawning once more. She removed her glasses for a moment to clean them with the side of her dress. "Well, I really should let you get to bed then, Helga…" She let out a breath and seemed to frown a little as she put her glasses back on. "Ten-years- old and up this late…I really do have a lot of things to fix about being a Mom, don't I…?" she mumbled to herself.
Helga, with a touch of concern in her eyes, was about try and reassure Miriam from her doubts once more that evening, when suddenly her mother just smiled to herself and then looked at Helga once again. "And speaking of that…as your 'Mom' I'd just like to go on record as saying that I'd prefer if the boy was snuck into the house and especially up to your room as minimally as possible when nobody's home… You said his grandparents and the rest of the people that live at his house are always around when you're in his room so that's fine…and I could probably even get your father to be okay with letting you two come up here alone when we're around as long as you don't lock the door…" She did her best not to let a chuckle escape her at the sight of how much Helga was blushing at this point. "But…" she went on to finish up, a warm smile still on her face, "From one girl to another…I can understand the need to try it every once in a while…and Arnold IS a very nice boy…so as long as your father doesn't find out I'd probably be willing to look the other way every once in a while…" She winked and Helga felt her face go entirely scarlet, much to her mother's continued amusement.
Miriam finally had to let out a giggle. "Oh Helga, you look so cute blushing like that…" Her eyes lit up. "We should try out some make up on you sometime…just in case you and Arnold go anywhere really formal. Oh you'd look so precious with just a little bit of pale pink blush and some lip gloss…" She had leaned over just slightly, really examining her daughter's face as she spoke. She pulled back now, though, and smiled, her arms crossed over her chest. "We didn't let Olga use make up until she was twelve, but like you said you two are different people…so I think ten would be fine for you, if you'd like."
Helga just looked down and to the side at this sudden suggestion, her eyes wide, and her voice obviously riddled with nerves. Heat was flooding her face. "I-I'll, uh…I'll th-think about it, Miriam…" she managed to stutter, feeling complete embarrassment finally overtake her. 'Okay, she needs to leave now before I pass out…or she remembers that I admitted to kissing him. Crimeny, I have a big mouth!'
Miriam smiled happily at her daughter. "Good! Well, goodnight again, sweetie!" She walked back over to Helga's door and turned the handle, opening it, but couldn't resist looking back over her shoulder and whispering so her voice wouldn't carry over into the next room, "Oh, and don't stay up too late giving Arnold a quick call goodnight and another kiss over the phone or anything—there's going to be a great big breakfast at 9 am sharp tomorrow with all of our names on it even if I have to get up at five to make it happen!" And before Helga could answer her mother winked once more and then shut the door behind her.
Helga remained frozen for several seconds right where she was…just feeling her pounding heart pumping more and more blood into her face, her stomach twisting and shifting unbearably, and her own voice completely paralyzed with disbelief.
Finally, a huge sigh erupted from her and Helga felt herself collapse to the floor so that she was now sitting with her back to the closet door. "That…" she managed to get out after another moment, taking several deep breaths as she attempted to bring her heart rate back to normal, "…That was the most awkward conversation I have ever had with anyone. Ever. Including Arnold…" She closed her eyes and rested her head back against her closet door. "And that's saying something…"
Helga just remained sitting and breathing like this for a little while longer in the quiet of her room…trying to enjoy the relief slowly washing over her at the fact that this unexpected, unusual, unimaginable, uncanny, and just plain unbelievable night was finally over. "Heh—so much for a simple evening of quietly writing poetry alone…" she finally observed to herself with a laugh.
Helga reminisced upon her floor for several more seconds until she felt herself yawn once again, upon which she stood up and stretched and approached her bed… though, despite her obvious desire and need for sleep, she did her best to fight back the tiredness that was consuming her. In fact, a slight scowl came to her face as she crawled into her covers and then reached over to her nightstand. "No way I'm going to bed just yet…Things may have worked out alright but Olga's still getting the phone call of her life from me…" She picked up the phone receiver and began to dial. A half smile came to her face. "It won't involve as many threats as it might have if things with her blowing my secret wide open to Bob and Miriam really had gone south…" She chuckled at the sound of the receiver ringing quietly. "But still—it's gonna be a good one…"
A/N:
That's all for now, guys! I'll try and get the next chapter up in the next week or two and as I said, Arnold'll be back ;) Any guesses as to what Helga's third present is…because honestly I don't think it gets explicitly mentioned in this fic until many many chapters in the future, but I feel like it's either very obvious or very not obvious at all, lol. Oh and, slight spoiler alert: You will indeed, in very few chapters, be getting a full written out description of Arnold's dinner at the Pataki house complete with certain consequences of his date that night with Helga ;) It's going to be fun! YAY! And maybe a little more GeraldXPhoebe… ;)
Please review guys! You are all awesome my fellow HA! fans!
Happy Reading!
~Azure129 aka Jenna