The War Council - or what was left of it - sat around the Council Table in dismal silence. The Thirty Days set in the Ultimatum had long since passed, and the time of decision had come.

Merry had rejoined Legolas and his followers, not without some reservations.

"The League supports you." he explained," But we had a very heated discussion and then we took a vote on it : the majority was in favour of a 'wait and see' attitude. But then Gimli came in and gave a rousing speech , all about how the Fanfic Terrorists formed an Axis of Evil…and thàt caused an even more heated debate! Still, the vote had been cast, and in all fairness we could not change that, so half the League tore up their membership cards and left with Gimli. I fear his support is growing."

"I wish they were more reasonable and less warlike." said Frodo, " I understand though. What Gandalf said about the Fanfic Terrorists coming over here must terrify them, as it did Sam."

"It terrified me too," admitted Pippin, "I guess my decision to join you was not a very considered one : I just had hàd it with Gandalf calling me a fool all the time."

"Any chance of winning Boromir back?" asked Legolas, without much hope.

"I had a word with him in private." said Aragorn, " He sticks to his decision. He says he cannot efficiently assure the safety of our world and our peoples with his hands tied behind his back."

"A perfectly understandable point of view from a Military Man. " said Legolas with a shrug and a sigh.

"The Hawks have chosen their camp," said Galadriel, "Mayhap the Doves will prevail. Yet the stormclouds are gathering : you must make a decision now. "

Legolas sighed again. " I suppose we had better . Let's go over Treebeard's lists again,category for category, and choose the worst cases to confront."

"Hoom! The first category is a linguistic one : 'Rampant spelling mistakes, grammatical errors, and so on…'."

"Who put that in?!" cried Frodo, "That's not a crime according to our Ultimatum."

Treebeard said nothing, merely looked pointedly at Tolkien.

"Ahem…I insisted on putting that in. I àm a professor of English after all. If it's worth doing, it's worth doing properly."

"Strike that category, Fangorn." said Legolas ,"I am sorry Master Tolkien, but we are solely concerned with attacks on us, not on the english language."

"Hom! Shall I strike the section : ' No style, unbelievable plots, sloppy pacing, logic-defying situations, endless repetition of the same etcetera 'as well ?"

"If you must ." said Tolkien glumly, " I suppose they don't have to be Nobelprize winners."

"We're not judges of literature either." said Legolas, "Next category?"

"'Not checking up on facts in a serious fic.'"

"He's not very good at giving names to his categories, is he?" whispered Pippin to Merry.

"Sloppiness again…pass that one too."

"'Self-insertion and Mary Sues'?"

"Oh, horrible things!" cried Merry, " All those people coming over here and saving the day, as if it were so easy."

"And coming between me and Aragorn." agreed Arwen, " As if Eowyn wasn't enough."

"My sweet, I assure you that there was nothing between me and Eowyn, nothing at all! "protested Aragorn.

"Er…at the risk of you falling all over me…" interrupted Frodo, " But now that I have actually met some Fans, I understand their fics better. They actually dream of coming here, no? Kind of sweet, really."

"Kind of satisfying to their egos, really." said Merry, "They know it all in advance, clever little thems, solving all our problems…quite the heroes. Probably not at all what they would be like in real life."

"Walter Mitty!" cried Tolkien all of a sudden.

"I beg your pardon?"

"It's one of our stories .Walter Mitty, who is nothing like a Hero, dreams of being one. His Dreams become more real to him than Reality."

"To Elves, the Dreamworld is more like unto the Living World than it is for Mortals." said Arwen, " If these stories are their way of Elvendreaming, then as an Elf, I may not find fault with that."

"I'm sure all those Mary Sues would be happy to hear that."

"Let's rest this subject for a moment," decided Legolas, "Remember, it is willfull harm done to us that we worry about, not their Dreams of Love and Glory."

"Oh, if you want willfull, then you want parody." said Pippin." Poking fun at our expense. Making clowns of us all."

"It's meant to make people laugh,"said Frodo, " I like people to laugh."

"Some people don't see the humour of it." said Merry,."I agree with Pip. There is fun and there is ridicule. And there is quite a lot of the latter…"

"But is it meant to hurt?"

"If you are going to take that attitude…you'll be letting all of them off!" cried Pippin.

"Oh, not the violent slash and torture for slash and torture's sake stories, surely." said Arwen.

"Need we even discuss those? Anything can entertain, one way or another, even a Mary Sue, but wallowing in another's pain, that's really, really sick." said Frodo.

"What if it's essential to the plot, what if they are meant to create a greater awareness to the problem of sexual violence and torture?" asked Treebeard.

"I can see that you rarely figure in one of them." said Aragorn sourly, "What if it is the plot? If they want to write a homosexual lovestory, or even a Slam-Bam-Thank -You- Man one, fine by me, but not with me, please.

Can't they invent characters of their own?"

Legolas consulted the lists.

"'What if' are the operative words here. All of these fics fit one way or the other into the 'Not sticking to the Original, or A.U.' category."

"It's rewriting the story alltogether!" cried Tolkien.

"Doesn't it bore them, telling it over and over again?" asked Merry.

"They are exploring different viewpoints, I think." said Legolas," By changing a detail or two…"

"You call my sex-life a detail?" asked Aragorn

"….they hope for a different outcome."

"The only other outcome would be for Sauron to win!" cried Pippin, " No thank you very much."

"Another way of getting to the right outcome, then " corrected the Elf.

"Well, it's imaginative, anyway." said Frodo.

Tolkien was less indulgent.

"They should write their own instead!" bristled he, " Use their much-vaunted imagination to invent a world and characters of their own. Really, if the only thing that theirs have in common with mine is their names, they might as well."

"I admit it is a dilemma. Either their characters are us, and then it's defamation, or they are not us, and we can not in all conscience condemn them." said Legolas. "I honestly don't know. We've come to the core of the argument here. If their 'dreaming'includes changing our whole world down to our characters, do we approve or not? "

There were cries of 'Not ! ' and 'Depends…' and 'Dream on!'.

"What is behind their writing?" wondered Frodo, " Dreams? Why do they do it? We never actually discussed that."

"They write for fun, I guess." said Merry, "Or to practise writing. Or both."

"Well, I wish they'd go practice on someone else!" said Pippin, with feeling.

"They do, actually. We passed over the 'Crossover-fics' category." said Treebeard.

"Great, so they are pestering others as well! Maybe we should all unite and stand up against the Fanfic terror." Pippin was getting all heated up now, and balled a fist in the air, " We Shall Overcome!!!"

"Overcome what?" asked Frodo in surprise.

"Er…don't know, it's just one of their songs…"said Pippin sheepishly.

"Well, there you are then, they have a saving grace: you like their songs!" chuckled Legolas, "But, seriously, the problem is, as I have pointed out before, that they don't believe we exist, so they think they can do with us what they like. Fictional Specieism, Gimli called it. Perhaps a more peaceful method of dealing with that would be to demand our Civil Rights."

"Emancipation of Fictional characters!" nodded Arwen approvingly, " 'I Have A Dream Too."

"I suppose you could appeal to the United Nations to get recognised as equal to Human Beings , with Equal Rights , and have Middle Earth or Arda as a whole declared an Independent State, with all the rights of an internationally recognised Nation." said Tolkien, "But someone has to plead your cause, and you'd need support from more than one government of the other nations!"

"Would that fellow Bush, Boromir's chat-pal, be a likely such person? He is leader of one of their greatest Nations, is he not?" asked Legolas.

"Of the USA, yes, and I'm sure he would do it, Americans are a generous people as a rule.But some Nations, when America is in favour of something , are automatically against. Besides, it would take time; there are entire Peoples clamouring for a State of their own, and others begging for years for the UN to free them from oppression. If real people are left out in the cold, fictional ones will be put right at the bottom of the priority list, if at all."

"Nice people you've got over There." said Pippin sarcastically," They even hate each other. Maybe the Hawks are right after all ." He was clearly having second thoughts on the camp he had joined.

Legolas, seeing that he was about to lose a supporter, quickly cut in : " Any others who can support us?"

"Perhaps I have something." said Arwen, "I have received an E-mail from something called the Canon Police."

"A canon, that's a kind of weapon, no?" asked Aragorn.

""No, that's a cannon." said Tolkien.

"'Canon' is another word for 'Sticking to the Original." said Arwen. "Apparantly there are among the Fanfic Writers those who act against Non-Canon stories and their authors… I'm not quite sure whether it is meant as a joke or not."

"How chilling!" cried Tolkien, "A Canon Police, that brings unpleasant images of KGB, Gestapo and other Secret Police activities. Not something to joke about at all, and if it is meant seriously, then we certainly should not associate with them. Much as I detest them, I don't want to see those writers lifted from their beds to disappear into concentration camps, or altogether 'Nacht und Nebel'…" he trailed off : it just occured to him that that was precisely what they had been planning to do : exterminate, whithout appeal, without reprieve. He turned very pale .

The others, who had never heard of concentration camps, and who would have been appalled if they had, nevertheless understood what he meant, and stared at each other rather shamefacedly: they shared the same, unpleasant thought.

"How awfull! It is good you held us back, Legolas. Your sense of fairness and morality saved us from committing a terrible, terrible act, far worse than any Fanfic Writer has ever done!"

Legolas looked unhappy.

"Yet I let my anger rule me too, in the beginning. It is strange, but it only gradually began to dawn on me that we were dealing with people, not Orcs. I could think of nothing else than to treat them like Orcs, and exterminate them. And then, slowly, very slowly, the cloud from my mind, and my heart, lifted. I don't know …I…felt more …more real somehow."

"So you are. A change has come."said Galadriel, "Can you not feel it? It is in the Air, the Water, the Earth, but most of all in ourselves."

"What kind of change?!" cried Pippin. "I don't feel different."

"Don't you? Yet you stood up to Gandalf. Would you have done so before? You are breaking free. We are all breaking free."

"Free from what.?" Asked Merry.

"From how hé has written us. " said Galadriel, with a nod in the direction of Tolkien. "Our Stereotypes. 'Wise Elven Queen', 'Lost King, ' , 'Stubborn Dwarf, ' Irritable yet Wise and slightly Superior Wizard', 'Bungling yet Brave Youngster', 'Strong ,Silent and Not Entirily to be Trusted Man' and so forth. As it was written, so it became. Small wonder that we could not see our Enemy as anything other than Evil orcs and vowed to exterminate them as such: we were not written to act in any other way."

"I seem to recall that I was very lenient with the Easterlings and Haradrim." said Aragorn.

"So you were, but had they been Orcs, it would have been different. We not only are Stereotypes, we think in Stereotypes. Therefore we saw the Fanfic Writers as Stereotype Evil Enemy.Yet we have come to be more discerning, for the Boundaries are fading, and nothing is as it was before."

"Boundaries…between our Reality and Theirs?" asked Legolas.

"Exactly. Everything exists somewhere, and so wé exist, in a Reality of Fiction."

"I'm getting confused." sighed Pippin, "What are we, Real or Fictional?"

"What a minute! " cried Merry, "Remember how, when we made our peace with Mr. Tolkien, Frodo pointed out that we were acting in a fanfic?"

"Yes, and that was when we swore vengeance upon the Fanfic Writers." said Legolas exitedly, "Merry, I believe you are on to something. That may have started it all!"

Galadriel shook her head. "No, the changes were there before: their Reality had invaded our Fiction already. We became aware. We became aware of him!"

Again she nodded at Tolkien, " And we took him into our World. Or so it was in that particular fic.Creator and Creation stood face to face. It may not have been the beginning, but it certainly was the pivotal point. The Boundaries fell. We took the fic up from there, and contiunued it. Yet instead of that fic, which was finished, ruling us, we were free to act in our own way. At first, that was the stereotype way, as set within that fic, but we have evolved, and there is no stopping it now. We are becoming."

"Becoming?"

"Becoming real people."

The expressions of those present ranged from apprehension to terror.

"Can't we just sent Mr. Tolkien back to the Dead?" asked Frodo.

"Or get rid of that one author, Treebeard, do we have info on that person?" asked Legolas.

"I'd need a name…"

"Try cross-referencing with fics including Master Tolkien."

Treebeard tapped in the data into his laptop.

"I believe I've got it. 'the Trial of Tolkien', by someone called Aemi. No biography, just an E-mail adress."

"Mail that person to withdraw the story at once!" ordered Legolas;

"It will make no difference." said Galadriel, "The Story has not only been written, but read."

"That leaves us no other option than to kill that Aemi. " said Aragorn. "One life sacrificed for the sake of both our worlds."

"Everything existst somewhere," Galadriel reminded him, " Even the Dead: witness Master Tolkien. And the Wheels have been set in motion, they will not be stopped in so simplistic a fashion. In our Fiction, it was all a matter of destroying the Ring for Evil to disappear. But in the Reality of Humankind, matters may be very different."

Tolkien sighed deeply.

"It is all my fault. My critics were right. They said my story was too Manichaean : Good Guys, pure as driven snow, versus Bad Guys. I tried though… but when you have a Dark Lord and Orcs and Trolls for an Enemy what else can they be but Evil incarnate? In my World it is very different indeed, allthough we often made it appear so. I fought in a terrible war , and was told that the soldiers in the opposite trench wère evil incarnate, that they speared babies on their bayonets and chopped the hands of women; and the other fellows were told that thèy were in the Right and we in the Wrong. And the women and babies stories weren't true either. Though some may have been Orcish, most were ordinary men , like us, with women and babies of their own, trying to make the best of things, driven into war by forces beyond their control. Like Politics. I never liked Politics, so I kept it out of my story as much as I could. And now I pay the price for my simplistic visions.I should have known better than to let myself carried away so. I did know better, but I did not want to know: I was so angry and disgusted with what I read : my life's work perverted, that I became a Hawk. I should have been the one to stop you : this whole War is a terrible mistake!"

He burst into tears, " All I ever wanted was to write an entertaining story! If only I could unwrite it!"

"Perhaps you can." said Galadriel. " You are the Creator, after all."

"Do you want him to write us into nothingness?" cried Merry, appalled.

"I believe I suggested something like that from the beginning." said Aragorn. "And you all told mé that it was a bad idea."

"Not unwrite, rewrite." said Galadriel.

"Reset the Boundaries, you mean, just like that?" asked Legolas.

"Would it work? " asked Frodo, "Isn't it too late, with their Reality so far into our Fiction?"

"Perhaps a try-out?" suggested Treebeard.

"On what? We might unsettle the balance even more. Accelerate the process." said Arwen.

"Well, there is one thing that can safely be changed!" said Frodo, " And that's you and Aragorn. You are still much as how that Aemi has written you."

"And for that alone that terrorist should be damned to Utumno and back." growled Aragorn. Then he cast a furtive glance at Arwen. To his relief, she nodded in agreement.

"Try it, Mr.Tolkien." said Frodo encouragingly.

"But I can't just write : 'And then they were themselves again.' !" protested the Author, "I must have a plausible explanation, that's what story-writing is all about!"

"What with wavering realities , every explanation will seem like a plausible one! Just call it Magic!" said Pippin.

The Author took out a note-book and pen (laptops were beyond him) and started to scribble. Then he read what he had scribbled, crossed it out, started again, read, and tore out the paper and crumpled it up.

"It's no good. Inspiration doesn't come just like thàt!" he snapped his fingers.

Galadriel went over to him.

"Have faith in your ability. We all have faith in you. " said she, in a soft voice, laying a gentle hand upon his shoulder.

Tolkien started to write again. After a while, he gave a satisfied grunt. " Done! Should I read it aloud?"

"Best let the magic do its work in silence. But you must wish it to be so!"

"With all my heart!" Tolkien closed his eyes and pressed the notebook to his chest. " As I have written, so shall it be!"

And Galadriel went over to Aragorn and Arwen, and looked each of them deep into the eyes, and into their souls, deep, deep, deeper stll, untill she found the cores that were the essential Arwen and Aragorn, as Tolkien had written them; and she chased away the false Characters the Evil Fanfic Terrorist had given them. And Aragorn straightened his back, and in his eyes Resolve and Strength came again; and Arwen's face softened, and in her eyes shone Wisdom and Love. They were themselves again.

Everyone cheered.

"Hurray for Tolkien! The Author who can beat any Fanfic Writer!"

"We're saved!"

Smilingly, Tolkien showed them what he had written : and it was exactly what had happened.

Arwen turned to Aragorn, and took his hands in hers.

"Welcome back, my love."

"Are you sure?" he asked with a smile, " Perhaps you'd prefer me as a meek and obedient husband."

Arwen laughed." You know me better than that! Although…" she added with a slightly mischievous smile, " I'd still prefer you to wear something else than your Ranger outfit."

"Not the Armanis!"

"Not the Armanis." conceded Arwen.

"Hip hip hooray!" cried Pippin dancing up and down, " They are truly themselves! Oh! " He stopped in mid - caper. "Are you still going to give that talk on Feminism? Only my Diamond so wanted to come, see…"

Arwen laughed.again.

"Yes Pippin, I still am. I may not be the bossy Arwen anymore, but I do think a little Women's Lib wouldn't come amiss over here!"

"Provided there will still be an over Here" Legolas reminded them."We may be able to rewrite our Fiction, but can we reset the Boundaries? It is not said that Master Tolkien has power over his Reality : he is only The Creator over Here. What I would like to know is how exactly we learned of the Fanfics. For my part I was first told about them by Gimli."

"I found the site on the Internet."confessed Pippin.

"How did the Internet get here?" wondered Merry, " It's an invention from over there, along with Computers, Cellphones and Electricky and stuff."

"There was a man selling it at the door."said Pippin, " He showed me all you could do with a computer. As I wanted to write a History of the Tooks, I thought it might come in handy. He talked me into getting an Internet connection as well, because, said he, there were lots of informative sites."

Legolas frowned deeply.

"Gimli told me almost exactly the same story; only he wanted to look up sites on mineralogy, and got a booklet with popular sites. Fanfiction.net was among them."

"The same thing happened to us in Minas Tirith!"cried Aragorn, "Was it the same man? Has anyone else had dealings with him?"

Frodo, rather shamefacedly, admitted that he and Bilbo had received a similar visit, and, after much embarrased homming ('I thought it might help us in our search for Entwives…') so did Treebeard.

Each one's discription of the man was exactly the same : youngish, three-piece suit, slicked back hair, a small suitcase and a very glib tongue.

"So, regardless of Time and Space, this same man has gone to each you, even those who live in Valinor, even Boromir who resides in the halls of Mandos. This cannot be a coïncidence."said Galadriel pensively, " Excuse me, but this is something I must look into urgently. The menace may be greater than we thought."

She left hurriedly.

"How much greater can it get?!?" cried Frodo in despair.

"Galadriel fears a sinister purpose behind all this."said Arwen, "A master manipulator whose cruel mind has plotted it all. I can think of only one such Being."

"Morgoth." said Legolas in a terrible voice, " The Enemy of the World."

XXX

A little more serious this chapter; one does get serious when one's own execution is under discussion.

The firing squad? Legolas with lots of arrows! Beheading? Gimli with the axe on the nearest block of wood.

Or, more Socratic, the Poison Cup? Elrond and hemlock!

'The End is Nigh!' in more ways than one.