Disclaimer - I don't own Bleach. If I owned Bleach, Yamamoto would have his shirt stapled to his chest. No matter how ripped he is, there is no excuse for seeing that much flesh on a guy that old.
-Nemu handed her master the drill, and, grinning like a lunatic, he approached Toshiro, hand raised menacingly in the air.
However, before he had taken two steps, Rangiku (safe in the knowledge that Toshiro was unconscious and therefore unaware of her brain patterns) launched herself at Mayuri. Using her unnaturally large breasts to propel her forward at break neck speed (incidentally a trick she had picked up whilst running from her Captain); she was like a speeding bullet - invisible to the naked eye. Unfortunately for her, Mayuri's eye wasn't naked. He had inserted a thin film over his retina's several hundred years ago. This film acted like a cross between a telescope and a camera - it locked in on Matsumoto's movements and with a quick flick of his wrist, he sent her flying straight through one of Byakuya's previously unharmed walls.
A groan filtered through the freshly made hole in the wall (Byakuya shuddered at the repair work he would have to have done), signaling that Rangiku was, in fact, alive after all. Unohana - never one to waste a good distraction - scurried through the wall after her, and soon the gentle warmth of healing reiatsu filled the room.
With both hormonal females gone, Byakuya suddenly felt a lot like his old self. What did these people think they were doing? He was the 28th Head of the Kuchiki Clan, Squad 6 Captain - and this was his office. How dare these lesser cretins enter his barracks like this, and create such an inappropriate disturbance - in front of a noble no less. Slowly he rose from the chair that had been supporting him throughout the entire ordeal. Shoulders thrown back proudly, chin raised just enough to show he was of a higher class; Byakuya took a step forward -
And fell majestically.
It seemed his legs hadn't recovered from the shocks of the evening, and instead of taking the desired step, he had crumpled to the ground like a faulty house of cards. Mayuri and Nemu both stared at him in amazement; Byakuya was looking equally bemused as he found himself sitting on the floor, not in the least where he was expecting.
It was at moment like these when Mayuri was glad that the fragile lenses covering his eye had a recording function. This footage would be extremely amusing to go over later. But right now, he had a mind reader to experiment on. The thought filled him with a sense of pure joy, and, ecstatic, he turned his full attention back to the job at hand. However, that rush of euphoria that flooded Mayuri's psyche was so strong that it shocked Toshiro's newly evolved brain cells back to life.
Wide eyes snapped open - pupil and iris both completely white, giving the impression that they had disappeared into his skull. The shaking that had previously racked his body was gone, replaced by a steady hum of vibrating energy that seemed to fill Toshiro's being with a serene power. His legs slowly unfurled and his slim body seemed to flat off the floor. Feet planted firmly on the ground, eyes blank and unseeing, he appeared much taller that his 4"4. Even Mayuri, driven insane by desire, halted - so taken aback by the abnormal, regal, beauty that stood before him. Glowing white light flowed from him, and wave after wave of pulsating reiatsu filled the room. This tsunami of mutated energy pushed outwards, covering the entire Seireitei in a translucent dome. And inside that dome, many poor souls found their privacy very much infringed upon.
The 'changed' spirit energy emanating from Hitsugaya had an extremely strange effect on those who happened to be in range. Take, for instance, Shunsui and Ukitake, who were in the middle of discussing recent events over a cup of tea. Kneeling on the floor, they had just finished debating about Aizen's betrayal when they paused to gather their thoughts. It was in this silence that Toshiro's wave of energy shot through them. And it was in this silence that Shunsui's voice could clearly be heard to say,
"Ah look at how beautiful; and delicate he looks in that uniform; of course he would look better without it"
Ukitake, who had been halfway through bringing his cup to his lips, stared open mouthed at his best friend - who, to his credit, looked equally shocked. See, although it had obviously been Shunsui's voice that had filled the air, Shunsui had not opened his mouth. It was as if the thought had, quite of its own accord, leapt from his mind and a pair of speakers had bounced it around the room. Ukitake's cheeks flushed a bright crimson, and Shunsui suddenly found himself unable to stop sweating, no matter how cool he usually remained in tricky situations. They remained kneeling, frozen into statues, hoping that if they ignored it they could pretend it never happened. The heavy atmosphere pressed against them, and when Shunsui was unable to bear it anymore, he silently stood and left the room. This left an insanely red Ukitake to become dizzy as the oppressive weight lifted off him, and he allowed himself the truly under-rated luxury of fainting.
Spanning across the Seireitei similar scenes were becoming a common occurrence; Kiyone and Sentarō were arguing over who would bring their Captain him medicine, when they found themselves engaged - quite without even opening their mouths.
Yumichika's peculiar penchant for cross dressing was abruptly revealed to the public - not that anyone was particularly surprised (aside from Ikkaku, who started crying due to the images the confession conjured up).
In a run-down bar near the outskirts of the Seireitei Kenpachi was drinking with Kukkaku Shiba, when his own desire to initiate certain carnal activities with her was broadcast across the room. He threw back his spiked head in ferocious laughter at the wide eyed stares of other bar patrons, before shrugging,
"Well it had to come out sometime"
And grabbing Kukkaku roughly, sticking his tongue down her throat.
Momo suddenly found herself very aware of what S&M was.
Rukia learnt all about Renji's shrine to her brother - complete with paper mâché kenseikan and a collection of cherry blossoms.
Fetishes, rivalries, jealously and relationships were stripped bare in a matter of seconds. There was nowhere to hide. Understandably, panic set in. All those with enough spirit energy to discern the epicenter of the waves did so - and these powerful Captain-class Shinigami set off almost simultaneously towards the 6th Division barracks. Their aim: To figure out what the hell was going on - and more importantly how to stop it.
Back in Byakuya's office things where quickly spiraling out of control. Toshiro's power was growing exponentially, each new bout of energy more powerful than the last. In fact the waves seemed to be solidifying gradually, forming a protective clear dome around him. Hitsugaya was still visible in the middle, palms turned upwards, eyes unblinking. Slowly the transparent barrier started to vibrate and static appeared, causing it to look similar to a television before tuned to a channel. Unbeknownst to those gathered in the office (Rangiku had run back in to check on her Captain as soon as she recovered, and Unohana had no choice but to follow), this was what Toshiro had experienced before receiving a vision in the early stages of his 'condition'. On the cinema sized screen in front of them, the images that Toshiro had seen in the heads of his comrades appeared, pasted together like a badly edited home video. First up was naked Kira with a golden egg, then Toshiro in a bunny outfit (it was actually good he was completely unaware of what was happening, else everything would have gotten a hell of a lot colder), then Byakuya as Zeus and so forth. The group cringed collectively at Suì-Fēng's strangely masochistic imagery, and frowned at Momo's worrying thunderstorm. At this point all remaining Captains crashed through the only remaining intact wall in the crowded room - just in time to see Byakuya's naked body projected on a huge cinema screen across the entire office.
Ahhh, why am I so cruel to Byakuya? Truthfully it's because, personally, I wouldn't mind seeing his nude form plastered all over my wall. But kidding aside (kidding?), I had much fun writing this chapter even though I couldn't upload it for a while since I was on holiday. Which was amazing, thank you for asking - you Americans are lucky getting to live somewhere so sunny all the time. As always I would love if you could review; knowing people like my stories is pretty much what keeps me writing. And no fear, I'll update soon.