It's already Thanksgiving! What happened to this year?! It's flying by so quickly! (To those of you from other countries, Thanksgiving is an American holiday) A lot has been running through my mind lately. I'm kinda of a quote person. Am I the only one? Between songs, movies and books I can never get enough of them. Lately I've been thinking of putting together a collection of Barnalique quotes and publishing it. Would anyone be interested in that? Anyway, here's my response to the reviewer from Chapter 6:
First of all thank you for reviewing! As for the mistakes, I did go back and look for them. I edited the few that I saw and didn't catch when I went through it. I appreciate the help as I am a completely self taught writer, and I have never actually taken a writing class in my life. If this is the person I think it is, I'm actually half your age. Literally. Basically, I'm an amateur and know that I should really listen to advice from people who are much more experienced than me. And yes, my Angelique is written very peculiarly, and this is something I have done on purpose. (If you are who I think you are) In your book(s) Angelique and Barnabas' relationship is portrayed different than I think both her and her relationships would have been. Of course, I'm coming from the viewpoint of a character who will eventually become the antagonist. At least through Tim Burton's universe, that is. I find beauty in the nature between good and evil, and more specifically the makings of it.
After realizing what a big flop my last book was, I decided to thoroughly plan out this story so I will have some good structure, making this book (hopefully) much more enjoyable than my last. The "beloved witch" that we see in DS is a very conniving, evil woman hell bent on revenge. But you can't start out that way, can you? Who comes out of the womb with a psychotic need to ruin the Collins family? Not many. I do realize that right now this is not the character portrayed through Tim Burton's story, but I am also not Tim Burton. Again, if this is who I suspect, you know it is much more interesting to play with an OC character. Angelique must have experienced traumatic loss and devastation from losing him either out of reason, or true insanity. So yes, I'm trying to work up to a point here. All of what I've done will be explained eventually. I know this is hard to grasp given my previous writing nature, but I'm trying my best to evolve from that. Thank you again for your time! If my assumptions were correct, just PM me. I am not embarrassed of my mistakes, I intend to grow from them.
But aside from school, work and life in general I think this chapter turned out okay (for once)! Hope you enjoy and remember to give me some feedback!
"I am sixteen going on seventeen
I know that i'm naive
Fellows I meet may tell me I'm sweet
And willingly I believe
I am sixteen going on seventeen innocent as a rose
Bachelor dandies
Drinkers of brandies
What do I know of those
Totally unprepared am I
To face a world of men
Timid and shy and scared am I
Of things beyond my kin
I need someone
Older and wiser
Telling me what to do
You are seventeen going on eighteen
I'll depend on you."
- Leisl, Sound of Music
Love seemed very surreal. Intriguing, engrossing and breaking people's hearts constantly. It impacted so many things, changing history and people's lives. Forcing them to do things they never would if they didn't experience it. When really, it wasn't anything at all. A person could not fight love head on. Even she tried to do so, but truly she knew she never could. Angelique couldn't control her emotions, she could only bury them. Like all the rest of her emotions, really. To her they were still unknown ground. They seemed to create some sort of a invisible bond. One that everyone could see and feel, or no one at all. That relationships were formed not only by choice, but by coincidence. It was exotic. But these bonds, thought to be inseparable, were really quite fragile. One sudden moment in a relationship could could change a whole line of history. A frightening, yet incredibly interesting concept if she had ever heard one.
Angelique went about her chores fluidly, not having to think twice about them. Since she had been doing the same thing for over ten years now, concentration wasn't very necessary anymore. This was something she learned to appreciate as it gave her full access to her thoughts during most of the day. Her main topics that morning had shifted from contemplating how to keep Joshua out of her love life, worrying for hours about the ball tomorrow and more recently, the essence of love itself and how not to get caught up in it. She often wished she could write her thoughts, so she wouldn't forget them. But with writing comes secrets, and that could lead to a whole other line of unfortunate events that always come with expressing herself.
She let out a frustrated sigh which broke her previous concentration. Dust had crept into every corner of this house even though she had just cleaned it two day ago. So much for thinking that this house's new construction would've prevented dust.
Dust. The word itself could get her into a mood in mere seconds. A silly thing, at that. But her whole life literally revolved around it. She removed it. There was no difference from her feelings today as when she was a child. If dust didn't exist, she wouldn't be needed as the Collin's servant. Angelique hated it's existence, it's purpose. Everything. She really did spend too much time thinking about it.
Suddenly a presence interrupted her internal rambling. Gentle footsteps made their way towards the door. Most all the time she could distinguish who someone was by their footsteps. Whoever this was were light on their feet, but still firm. The amount of sound they made helped her determine how heavy they were. She knew instantly that it wasn't Joshua. He had a certain impotent way of carrying himself when he was alone that resulted in him stomping haphazardly. Even more so when he was drunk. And even though the presence was mellow, it wasn't flighty like the lady of the house or most of the maids. With these options eliminated Angelique knew who it was as soon as they touched the doorknob. By the way the persons shoes clicked as they walked she knew it was someone of wealth. But they did they did not barge or falter as they entered, instead they maneuvered themself with elegance. Only one person she knew fit those standards. But what was his motives for coming to the east wing library before lunch? As he opened the door he did not pause, as to move an object to the opposing hand to open the door. The doors were heavy and she knew that he was right handed. If he wasn't carrying anything than he must be there for her. For him to come to her in a time where he could be easily summoned elsewhere meant that he had an open desire to consult with her. Or, she thought, maybe he isn't as thorough minded as I. Even in the mere seconds it took for him to enter the room she had already summed up more than most could in an hour.
The tall oak door swayed and Angelique turned around, tucking a strand hair behind her ear. Barnabas was grasping his riding gloves and smiling at her warmly in the entrance to the room. Angelique stood a little straighter and moved the duster behind her back instantly. His eyes glowed as he ran a hand through his windswept hair. She had to admit she felt awfully immature for feeling her heart flutter a bit at a movement as simple as that. But she wouldn't ever try to talk herself out of acknowledging that he was... a lot of things, but unattractive was never one of them.
"Good morning Angelique", he noted warmly as he looked up and down her body. Barnabas had already left for the docks by the time she went to his room. She had to admit she was a bit disappointed that she didn't see him. Barnabas quickly glanced out the door after hearing a distant scuffing in the hall. He had left the door open, so she knew that he didn't intend to stay for long. Her lips curled into a faint smile and stepped closer to him.
"Good morning", she countered pleasantly, yet respectfully, keeping consideration of the open door. He didn't respond, instead he smirked playfully and looked out the large windows on the opposing wall. He clasped his hands behind his back, still holding his gloves. She took this as a time to make small talk.
"How was your ride?" No one had ever formally told her that he went riding after he returned from the docks, but she was confident enough to guess so. His gaze ventured back to her as exhaled comfortably.
"Exhilarating." He answered definitely and stepped closer to her, looking over her beautiful features. Angelique always seemed to feel some sort of a rare warmth around him. She was finding that it was becoming increasingly difficult to not let herself fall for him. A light chuckle resonated from her throat as she quickly contemplated his reasons for coming to her while he knew that she had things to get done.
"Would you like me to prepare a bath?" she asked flawlessly as he tilted her head back, hoping that she didn't sound ridiculous. Barnabas raised an eyebrow at her happily and added,
"That would be wonderful, thank you." A glint of his shining brown eyes caught her stare and she curtseyed playfully before him, turning her head. She swiftly set down the feather duster and walked out of the room as he followed her.
OOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOO
Nightfall had set in and the two had finally found a time to sneak away to the drawing room. The curtains were mostly drawn in the alcove where they stood, tucked away away from the world. A tiny sliver of the sunset over the ocean created a sense of segregation.
"What is that?", Barnabas noticed, looking down at the bruises on her neck in the soft light of the study. His tone was filled with concern. That was quite unusual for her to hear, even if it wasn't intended for her. Angelique immediately felt uncomfortable and lowered her gaze away from his. Anyone who was that close to her could see the outline of her injuries against the wide neckline of her dress. She knew he was going to ask and had been prepared with a reasonable answer to distract him. But as she racked her mind, all she could concentrate on was the warmth in his eyes, or his voice, or his glowing complexion. Once she noticed she wasn't answering immediately she composed herself. An uncomfortable silence was all she needed him to suspect about what happened.
"I tripped a couple of nights ago fetching water." Angelique answered him, reminding herself how to lie efficiently. Act confident and stick to your story, making sure that it's plausible and not ridiculous. Look them straight in the eye and show no signs of fright or stupidity. But specifically to this case, try to act respectable.
"Mhmm." he murmured slowly. Honestly, she wasn't able to read him at that moment. She wasn't sure if he believed her story or not. But nevertheless, he seemed to care about what happened.
Barnabas lightly brushed his thumb over the scar on her collarbone. Angelique felt a jolt of relaxation flow through her as he gently caressed her skin, distracting her from her internal motive. She wasn't standing with her arms around him to feel pity. That wasn't what she wanted. But honestly, it was too tempting for her to resist. Even after all these years since they were children, she still felt it difficult to not find pleasure in his touch. She thought deeply about why she should not. What was going to harm her from finding pleasure in him? Why should she not let herself fall in love with him?
'Parce qu'alors il aura la haute main.'
And winning was her true incentive. Nothing else. There was a time and a place for relaxation, and right now, was not it. She would be able to relax one day. That day would come, she was certain of it. The reason she wasn't doing it then was because there were consequences. She needed to remind herself of exactly what they were, and how to avoid them. If she fell for him now, she could lose sight of what could happen to her. Even though she refused to agree that it was fair, Barnabas and herself were on completely opposite sides of the spectrum when it came to class. And for now, there was nothing she could do about that. But really, all she needed to do was get rid of the Collins'.
Angelique had never actually looked at it that way. Nor did she really understand what she meant by her own statement. But when she came to think about it, if there were no Collins', she was no longer a servant in their household. If they died, she was free. To most, the thought itself was sick and immoral as it involved the murdering of many people. But to her, it seemed like more of a unique option. Angelique didn't think that doing such a thing would be as immoral as it seems to most because of her extremely altered concept of reality, and a general hatred for the family in general. But who could blame her?
Freedom. The thought itself escaped her. No rules. No expectations. A concept that was so foreign to her she could not picture it. To think that she could choose what she wanted to do, where she wanted to go, whom she wanted to speak to seemed unethical. She found herself smiling. Though strangely, luck was with her this time, as she was in the presence of Barnabas and he returned the gesture. If she was elsewhere, her actions could have caused a much different reaction.
'Rêverie sera la fin pour moi.'
Before she could think of what to do, his lips had found hers. And along with his touch came a utopia that she was now very familiar with. This time though, she wouldn't let herself relinquish control. An eccentric and somewhat disturbing thought, but she didn't think of it that way. In her mind, she was doing nothing strange. Just innovative.
Angelique had never learned exactly how to make a man desire her, nor did she particularly plan how she was going to. By now she was simply accustomed to men lusting over her, whether it could possibly harm her or not. Yet another unique gift from God. Not just beauty, but an undeniable sense of maturity and sensuality that could captivate nearly any man if she tried. She returned the kiss, but differently than he had expected. Her movements were smooth and slow, in a way that would easily been seen as innocent. But interestingly enough, it felt just the opposite. Soft moans resonated from her throat and her warm breath engulfed him entirely. She could tell by his movements that he was relaxing under her touch, both physically and mentally. He moved in closer to her, so much so that she had to loosen her hold on his neck.
Delicate, quick steps interrupted her previous state of mind entirely. Angelique broke their embrace instantaneously, leaving Barnabas flustered and scowling at her out of ignorance of the person entering the room. Due to her agile elimination process she already knew it was Naomi. She would have to come up with a mock situation and play it out within mere seconds. Miraculously though, this was one of Angelique's best qualities. Deception played out fairly well in her head. Within a second she had surmised a plan that would keep the two of them out of suspicion, and keep Barnabas from looking like a baffled idiot for standing in the middle of the drawing room blushing and catching his breath. In one swift movement she fixed his hair and cravat, rushed across the room and straightened her skirt. The moment his mother walked in the door Angelique's aura had completely reversed from frantic to disembodied and began pouring a glass of sherry absentmindedly. Barnabas, now realizing why she had been so frazzled, caught on to her scheme rather quickly. He smiled out the window at her resourceful thinking. He definitely owed her one now.
Naomi, having no idea whatsoever of their previous encounter, began walking towards her son. She seemed to either not notice Angelique as she walked in, or not really care. Barnabas turned around and smiled gently at his mother, watching Angelique edge towards them out of the corner of his eye. Naomi began to make small talk with her son as Angelique handed him the glass and turned around, making no eye contact with him. His mother seemed unconcerned about anything going on between the two of them as he answered respectfully,
"Thank you", while paying no heed to her whatsoever. After Angelique turned around and smirked as she walked back to the tray table and then to exit the room. The small segment of conversation she had heard between them was bland, and obviously what Naomi was planning on saying shouldn't be said in front of her. She knew what she was talking to him about of course, and she saw nothing wrong with this. Naomi was growing old, for she had had him later in life than most women. She was eager for Barnabas to get married and settle down. Angelique really thought there was nothing wrong with this at all. That's how mothers should feel. But unfortunately, her plans didn't exactly see eye-to-eye with hers. Angelique never particularly disliked Naomi at all. She was a rather normal woman, mostly kind and average to those of her standards. She was polite and respectable, she always sat straight up and kept an open mid on most subjects revolving Collinsport. The only thing she didn't like about her was her husband, and more so, how she could remain so silent and look away as her he committed such heinous acts. And not just to Angelique, either.
The dark haired woman rounded the corner to the lower West wing hall and walked quietly through the darkened corridors, her thoughts deep inside herself.
OOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOOoOO
His breathing slowed as she heard him walk closer and closer to her until she could feel his warm breath on her shoulder. Not in a way that was frightening, but comforting. A soothing act, though it was different than before. After a good twenty minutes, Angelique returned to the drawing room just as Naomi was exiting.
As soon as they heard the soft patter of her feet down the large staircase he let out a small sigh of relief and stepped closer to her.
"Finally", he murmured teasingly after a long yet blissful silence. She didn't expect his gentle hands to grasp her hips from behind and softly press his muscular chest against her back. But instead of making her breath hitch in discomfort, she let out a silent, yet long exhale as her hands snaked their way on top of his.
"I thought she would never leave," Barnabas finished and let they both let out a soft chuckle. Again that feeling of healing washed over her. He pressed his soft lips against her neck, leaving a trail of soft kisses up to her jawline. Angelique closed her eyes and let out something between a sigh and a soft moan. The feeling of tranquility she experienced from him was engulfing. It almost scared her because she felt such peace and happiness with him it was hard for her to concentrate on what she needed to do. Though honestly, it was tempting to forget the world and fall into his warm embrace both physically and mentally.
"What did she talk to you about?" Angelique asked him blankly, succeeding at hiding all her emotions.
"Many things. Most of them involving the plans for tomorrow of course." Barnabas muttered against her soft, ivory skin. She bit her lip unconsciously and stared out she windows at the back of the room. His lips tingled against her flesh and he rested his head on her shoulder as he wrapped his arms around her small waist. Angelique turned slightly to look at him and questioned him peacefully,
"Are you excited?"
"I suppose", he muttered against her temple, "but I would be enthralled if you were to be present." She smiled sincerely and again was reminded of the class difference. His soft lips lingered on her scalp and she closed her eyes.
"I missed you." she confessed, immediately wondering why she had said that. Angelique didn't plan on saying it, it just... came out. She actually voiced her emotions for once. It was all very strange to her.
"As did I." he purred and turned her around. Angelique didn't say anything at first and went along with his actions. She had to see his expression before she decided anything. When they were face to face she knew it was time to stop by the way he was looking at her. Desire was written clearly over his handsome features as he looked up and down her body, pulling her closer. This had to stop now.
She knew exactly what he wanted, but she wasn't giving up on her plan; no matter how amazing he made her feel. There was no way she was going to let him take what he wanted, then tire of her and move on. Barnabas didn't seem like he would forget her very easily, but she wasn't going to take any chances. He was her one way ticket out of misery; and she wasn't about to let it slip out of her hands. The difference between short and long term happiness was the main thing she needed to keep in mind.
"Not for long", Angelique countered in a seductive whisper. She pressed her hips against his and leaned her chest back into his solid hold on her waist. He furrowed his brow in confusion and started to speak but she silenced him by placing a delicate finger on his lips. His eyes strained as hers danced enticingly. She removed her hand but he remained silent and expectant as she slowly replaced it with her lips. An extra second or two of suspense before she kissed him was crucial. It would require patience and much experience for most people to be able to perfect such an act like this. But Angelique was anything but ordinary. Her head tilted slightly and she kissed him gently. A seemingly pure, innocent act, but somehow it felt more seductive than anything he had ever felt before. It only lasted for a second though, like she said. Barnabas followed her mystifying gaze only with perplexity and intrigue. She loved that stare. Craved it, even. He let go of her, but only out of bewilderment.
Angelique grabbed his hands as he slipped away from his hold on her. Her piercing blue eyes grasped his with intimacy and intrigue. Once again the connection between them tightened. Barnabas leaned in to her but she did not stop him. He moved to in to whisper against her ear. His smooth skin brushed over her cheek and she shuddered under his touch. But it was unlike any way she had ever been touched before. She shuddered in a way that silenced her worrying, freed her mind of hate, and ignited her heart with something she didn't quite understand.
"Find me in the stables before I leave tomorrow." Barnabas purred luxuriously. He breathed in her scent of vanilla and sandalwood. Angelique smiled, realizing she actually would be looking foreword to getting up in the morning for once. But she did notice that his statement came as an order. The possession she wanted in the relationship was supposed to be the other way around. There was not other way he would think of her as an equal. So, she took the opportunity to play a little "cat and mouse". She raised an eyebrow at him, waiting until he caught on to the hidden implication. Barnabas loosened his hold on her and smirked in general amusement.
"Please." He added in a cross between sincerity and muse. The dark haired woman smiled and ran her hands over his meticulously detailed coat. Angelique could tell by the look in his eyes that she was doing something right. He stood a little straighter, still getting accustomed to the intoxicating experience of being around her.
"We'll see." She concluded in her sensual french drawl and walked away. He couldn't seem to break his gaze on her until she left the room. She always seemed to have an undeniably arousing sense of mystery about her, and it never ceased to interest him.
"Life's great happiness is to be convinced we are loved."
― Victor Hugo, Les Misérables
Translations:
'Parce qu'alors il aura la haute main.' : 'Because then he will have the upper hand.'
'Rêverie sera la fin pour moi.' : 'Daydreaming will be the end of me.'
Feeling the foreshadowing yet? Gosh, I'm a sucker for a pre-supernatural romances. I have to tell you that wasn't how this chapter was originally planned to be, but c'est la vie. Besides, I think I like it better now. What do you guys think? Feeling good about the story so far? Bad? And to all those who despise Angelique, but still claim to know her; how do you think I'm doing? (If you don't get it yet that's fine, just keep reading) Because we've got plenty more to go...
Till next time jusqu'à la prochaine fois mes amours!
~ Angelique Bouchard ~