I'm back! I hope everyone likes this chapter. It wasn't in my original plan but I wanted to show how the other guys were handling things as well as a little bit of Casey. Reviews are loved!

Why was it that a microwave minute was always longer than a regular minute? All I wanted was my pizza and it seemed like it couldn't take any longer. I wanted to be able to enjoy my day off on the couch in front of the TV with a piece of pizza.

When the microwave finally went off I went directly to the couch and turned on the game. The second I sat down it seemed the doorbell went off. I was surprised to see Vargas standing there. That is until I remembered that I had told anyone if they needed to talk they were always welcome.

"Sorry to bother you on your day off Lieutenant." He looked more nervous than I had ever seen him before.

"You're fine, come in." I gestured into the house. He entered hesitantly. "Sit down." He made a slow move to sit down, so I sat first and that prompted him to follow. "So what's up?"

"I can't stop thinking about it." He seemed so relieved at confessing even a little bit. "I haven't slept because of the nightmares, I can't focus." He started crying.

"What were the nightmares about?" I decided to start with the most concrete thing he said.

"Everyone dies. Over and over and over. There is always some sort of huge fire and I'm always the only one that comes out alive."

"I've been having nightmares too." He looked shocked at my admission. "Slightly different but pretty bad. I was talking to Chief and he was able to help a little. It is definitely challenging to focus past the calls that someone died. But remember how many calls that everyone came back? That's what chief told me to focus on."

"That just seems impossible." His frustration was becoming more apparent.

"It is." I figured I needed to be honest. "But training your brain to do anything seems impossible, in my experience at least."

"Same." He finally cracked a little smile. "On that call, I was miserable the entire time. It seemed like a situation exactly out of my dream."

"That must have sucked. But you made it through, we all did. I hate the fact that it's the only thing getting me through this but it is."

"What if it happens again?" he spoke so quietly I could hardly understand him. "I mean someone dies on call…" he trailed off.

"Then we deal with it again- as a team." I tried to make eye contact but he was looking at the floor. "But the chances of that are a million to one; or something similar to that. Do you understand that?"

"I do, but I just can't get myself to believe it. Does that make sense?" I nodded in response sensing he wasn't finished "It sucks because I feel like I haven't been there for my family anymore, and I can't talk about what's wrong."

"Why can't you?"

"They'll see me as weak, and then treat me differently. Life at the house is already different enough."

"Why do you think they'll see you as weak?"

"I'm supposed to be the tough firefighter of the house. Emotion is considered bad it seems, also my dad fought in a few wars so death isn't exactly new to him."

"Is there anyone at home you can talk to?" I figured his dad was out of the question "Like your mom?" I offered a suggestion

"They tell each other everything. I have no other biological family around here."

"If you're comfortable talking to me it's ok to come over or call or talk to me at work." My heart broke for him at his confession; at least I could talk to Chief and Severide.

"If that's ok?" He seemed still like he was unable to fully trust me.

"If it wasn't ok I wouldn't have offered." I smiled a little. "What else do you want to talk about?"

"It just really sucks at home because I've had panic attacks and I have to pretend like nothing is wrong." He still wouldn't make eye contact with me and I completely understood why "It's exhausting."

"I'll bet. What are you nervous about specifically?" I tried to be helpful as opposed to just dwelling on what was wrong.

"I don't know why but I just get nervous that this is going to happen again, over and over." He made brief eye contact with me.

"Well I know this is easier coming from someone outside of you, but it isn't possible for this to happen again when you are at home; and if you're at the house everyone would be happy to help you with whatever you would need."

"Like who?" I sensed a bit of hope in his voice.

"Well I'm sure everyone would but I'm sure that I would help, Severide would, and definitely Chief would, if you wanted I could call them and put it on speaker phone and we could ask them about it."

"That sounds good." He nodded in agreement.

"Any preferences on who to call first?" I figured I should give him the option.

"Severide please."

"Do you want me to do most of the talking?" I assumed he would but I wanted to make sure.

"At first at least." He confirmed my guess.

"Ok I'll call him up." I found Kelly in my contacts and called him.

He answered on the second ring "Hey Matt. What's up?"

"I'm here with Vargas and we were wondering if you had a minute." I looked at Vargas who nodded in approval to my start.

"Always. What's going on?" The concern seeped into Kelly's voice even over the phone.

"Well Vargas has been really struggling after everything." I looked at Vargas again to see his approval "He is been having a lot of Panic Attacks and we were wondering if you would be willing to maybe help him out if he has one at the house."

"Of course I would. What would you want or need from me?" Kelly asked a logical question but understandably it seemed to have really freaked out Vargas.

"Well I guess it would be nice if I could just get out of the situation and talk to someone. If you'd be willing." Vargas spoke incredibly quietly and quickly.

"Of course I'd be willing, just let me know when you need me." Kelly paused for a second. "Hey, sorry I have to go. Talk to you guys later!" Kelly hung up quickly.

"Still want to call the Chief?" I looked at Vargas

"Not really. I actually need to be headed home. Thanks for everything." He stood up.

"Anytime." I smiled back at him.