Chapter 7:
Hours went by, and dinner time was soon approaching. While LeBeau was making dinner and Kinch was down in the radio room, Hogan had left Newkirk and Carter in charge of Gracie while he ran a couple errands around camp. At the moment, the duo were in Hogan's quarters making an attempt at changing Gracie's dirty diaper. Both of them were failing miserably at putting the new one on, but the baby found the situation funny as she lay on the bottom bunk of the colonel's bed on a blue towel the two flyers had found.
Gracie cooed and smiled as she looked up at both Carter and Newkirk, who were desperately trying to figure out how to get the clean diaper on her little body. At the moment, the corporal had given up and turned the task over to Carter.
"Can you go any slower, Andrew," Newkirk moaned. He had been waiting for three minutes now watching the young sergeant carefully think out his method.
"In a minute, Newkirk; we gotta do this right," Carter answered. He took the diaper and started wrapping it around Gracie like a bandage. Newkirk glanced over quick while he rolled his eyes, then back at the window looking outside into the compound. As soon as he realized what Carter was doing, he snapped his head at the man without warning and gaped at him. He hurried to his friend's side and lightly pushed him to the side.
"What do yah think you're doing, mate?" The Englishman exclaimed.
"Oh, well yah see, Newkirk, there's a certain way the diaper's gotta go on. If I remember correctly, you wrap it around babies like a burrito," Carter answered.
"That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard of" Newkirk started, as he undid the sergeant's messy work. "First off, that looks mighty uncomfortable. Second of all, yah gonna get yah hands all dirty if you put it on like that."
"How else are you supposed to put it on? Can't we just wash our hands with soap or something afterwards?"
"And pick up a newborn baby with filthy hands before getting to the sink? Andrew, you're bloody crackers."
Newkirk grabbed out some pliers from one of his pants pockets and pulled it up in viewing sight.
"We use these, mate. Here, I'll show yah," he said, as if he thought he were the master of changing dirty diapers. He lightly pushed the sergeant out of the way and began his teaching lesson. Carter hovered slightly to the side of Newkirk, watching him intently. The corporal had grabbed the diaper with the pliers and began wrapping it wrong, being careful of not to clasp down on Gracie's toes, fingers, arms, or legs. It was difficult to finish the job with Gracie constantly squirming around. Newkirk looked down when Gracie made some coo noises up at him. "Little mate, try not to move here, won't yah? I don't wanna take one of yah fingers off. The Gov'nor wouldn't be very happy if I were to do that, yah know."
Gracie looked up at Newkirk observantly. She gently kicked her legs and flailed her arms a little bit, making little grunts in response.
"Are yah sure you put it on like that, Newkirk? It looks kinda dangerous," Carter said, rubbing the back of his neck.
"Are yah kidding, mate? This is one of the most safest things in the book," the Englishman answered confidently. He turned his attention back to the baby and returned to what he was doing.
Hogan quietly opened his quarters door, his one hand on his lower back as if it ached from his recent 'weight gain'. He looked over at Newkirk and Carter and felt his eyes dilate in size instantly.
"What are you doing?" He asked, a bit of authority in his tone.
The two flyers shot to their feet and looked at the American officer.
"Gov'nor, just trying to show Carter here how yah change a dirty diaper here," Newkirk answered, with a smile.
"You don't change a diaper with pliers, Newkirk. You could seriously hurt a baby that way," Hogan remarked, with a slight growl. He hurried over to his bunk and gently pushed his corporal aside. "You do it like this." Hogan began putting the diaper on the correct way. After about thirty-seconds, Gracie had on a fresh diaper and clean, yellow pajamas with a duck on the lower left. The colonel carefully lifted her up and rested her gently on his shoulder, then stood up and started bouncing her gently and swayed back and forth. He looked over at both Carter and Newkirk, eyeing both of them carefully. "Didn't your parents or health teachers ever teach you how to change a diaper?"
"Gee, Colonel...I don't think I ever learned how," the sergeant answered, shifting awkwardly in his spot.
"I might have skipped that day in high school." Newkirk added softly, his eyes turned downward.
Hogan turned his eyes up to the ceiling and shook his head.
"Alright, new rule: Newkirk, no more bringing your tools around Gracie. If I catch you again, it'll be more than a warning," he ordered.
The corporal sighed and nodded.
"Yes, Gov'nor," he said.
Hogan nodded with satisfaction.
"Good," he answered. He looked down at Gracie and smiled. He started making several silly faces at her, making her smile and coo in response.
"Colonel, what did Wilson say when he saw you?" Carter asked, recalling one of the places he stopped was the infirmary to check on a prisoner with a severely broken leg.
The colonel looked at the young man and smirked, still gently rocking Gracie from side to side.
"At first, he was a little surprised and wanted to give me another examination. I told him what we had planned and currently going on with Klink, and he promised to keep quiet about it until I say otherwise," he reported.
"Yah think yah'll keep the act up even after Gracie's gone, Sir?" Newkirk asked.
"I don't know...we'll see how I'm feeling afterwards," Hogan answered.
The door to the private room again opened, and Kinch made his way inside and over to his commander with a sheet of blue notepad paper in his hand.
"Message from London, Colonel," he said, handing Hogan the slip of paper. He took it gratefully and read it out loud to the group.
"Gracie's new parents are Lora and Dr. Winston Northrop. They'll be here tomorrow evening waiting in the submarine for her. Firewind and Blue Eyes will meet us at the regular rendezvous point to take Gracie there to safety." He gave a small smile, but something was in his eyes that Kinch, Carter, and Newkirk all caught. A twinge of sadness floating in his brown eyes...almost a type of grief settling in.
"You alright, Colonel?" Kinch asked, with concern.
Hogan smiled small and nodded.
"I'm fine, Kinch; just gonna miss this little lady here is all," he answered, looking back at Gracie. She was fast asleep.
"She's gonna be well taken care of, Colonel. General Berkman promised me so," the radioman reassured him.
"I know she will be." The colonel still had the hint of sadness there, his expression gone dim.
Kinch nodded.
"We're out here if you need us, Colonel," he said, then turned to the others. "Come on, guys."
He, Carter, and Newkirk silently left Hogan to be alone in his quarters and closed the door behind them. When it made a soft 'click', he looked down at Gracie and gave her a small smile.
"It's been fun these past couple of days. You sure help make driving Klink crazy a lot more entertaining," he softly said. Gracie lay peaceful on Hogan's shoulder, content as a baby could be. The colonel sighed and continued. "I know you have to leave, and I'm happy you're getting new parents who are gonna love you and take good care of you...so why is it so hard for me to think of saying 'goodbye' to you?"
Hogan gave the baby a soft kiss on the top of her head, and rested his against hers as he gently rubbed her back.
The next night came sooner than anyone wanted it to. All five men were there at the rendezvous point as Hogan stood in front cradling Gracie, his pillow removed and looking normal again. He waited patiently for Firewind and Blue Eyes to make their appearance and, frankly, he wanted to stand there and wait forever. The longer they took, the more time they all had with Gracie in her last moments being in Germany. As soon as they came, it would be time to finally say 'goodbye'.
Gracie was sound asleep in the colonel's arms, and it made him feel better that she was. She would not be crying in fear when he handed her over to go to London with her new mommy and daddy. After another minute of waiting, two familiar faces appeared into the clearing: Firewind and Blue Eyes.
Hogan sighed and nodded. He knew what he had to do. He turned around and walked to each of his men so they could say 'goodbye' to their little friend. First in line was Kinch. The staff sergeant smiled and waved to the little baby in his commanding officer's arms.
"Goodbye there, little munchkin; stay out of trouble, you hear?" He cooed. He smile grew a bit wider, and Hogan moved onto Carter, who was grinning, but also had a heavy heart. He looked down at Gracie and shook her tiny hand.
"Boy, I sure wish I could've shown you some of my explosives, little buddy. Maybe if you come back and visit I can show you them. And by golly, are you gonna enjoy London. Why, I've heard that several of the…" the young man was cut off by his commander.
"Wrap it up, Carter."
He sighed and nodded.
"Goodbye, sweetpea; go visit the London Eye for me. I wanna know what you think of the view," Carter said.
Hogan moved onto LeBeau, who was wiping his eyes with a handkerchief he carried in his pants pocket. The colonel looked at him with a raised eyebrow, but a friendly expression on his face.
"I am French; we get emotional with these things," the Frenchman whimpered. He looked over at Gracie and sniffled. "Au revoir, ma petite mademoiselle; find some pretty girls that I should know about when you get to London."
Hogan finally made it to the last man in line. Newkirk looked slightly sad, but let a smile grow on his face.
"Well, little mate...I guess this is it. But if you're in town by the way and see me sister Mavis, tell her 'hi' for me, won't yah?" He asked, sounding as chipper as he could be.
Hogan turned around and looked down at Gracie one more time. It was now his turn to say 'goodbye'. He felt a knot in his throat, and his eyes were misting over. He fought back with every ounce of strength it took to not break down right there and now. He smiled small and nodded. He needed to be brave for the newborn, as she would probably be more upset than he was currently.
"I'm gonna miss you, baby girl...hopefully I'll see you again someday," he spoke softly. He knew anything louder, and his voice would start breaking. He took in another deep breath before finishing. "Goodbye, Gracie...Colonel Hogan will always love you."
The colonel gave her a soft kiss on the forehead, then gently handed her to Firewind. The leading agent took the baby and held her close to him. Blue Eyes looked up at Hogan, saw the pain in his expression, then gave a comforting smile and nodded.
"Don't worry, Papa Bear; we'll make sure she gets there safe and sound." The pretty blonde promised.
The colonel nodded and returned the smile. He waved goodbye to the two underground operatives and watched them disappear with Gracie into the night. When they were gone and out of sight, he tilted his head down and wiped the tears streaming down his cheeks away. He made it look like as if he were pinching the bridge of his nose, not wanting the others to see him in a weakened state of mind. He sighed shaky and slowly turned around to face his men with dim eyes and wearing a long frown.
"Come on, guys...let's go home," he softly said.
He kept his head down for none of his men to see his tears and made his way far enough that the men would not be able to hear him softly weep. Concerned, Kinch, Carter, Newkirk, and LeBeau slowly made their way back to the tunnels. The younger flyers wanted to get closer and see if they could do anything for Hogan, but Kinch told them to just give him his space for the night. He was grieving. They all were.
Two days went by, and Hogan had kept very distant from the others in camp. He only spoke to those around him if necessary and most of the time was either in his quarters with the door shut or down in the tunnels alone. All four of his men were growing troubled regarding their commanding officer's current state of mind. They could see the sadness and despair in his eyes, but none of them knew what to do about it. It was usually Hogan that was comforting them. Now the tables had turned, and they had no clue on what to do. They were discussing the matter further after morning roll call one day. As LeBeau made blueberry pancakes and bacon, Carter, Kinch, and Newkirk sat at the table with cups of coffee talking with each other and the French corporal. Hogan had again locked himself in his quarters and gave the orders that no one was to disturb him. He had even used the threat of having a court martial against them for emphasis.
"Boy," Carter said sadly. "I've never seen Colonel Hogan this sad before...I don't think I've ever seen him this sad at all before." He fumbled with the coffee cup in his hands and had barely taken a drink out of it. His thoughts were too focused on what he could do to make his commander and friend feel better again.
"I didn't expect losing Gracie would be so hard on him," Kinch answered. "He loved that little baby as if she had been his own."
"I don't think the Gov'nor's gonna be able to keep up this charade of his much longer in the current mood he's in. When Klink, Schultzie, or anyone else other than us aren't around, he removes that pillow from his shirt and barricades himself somewhere in sadness," Newkirk stated, lighting a cigarette.
"Poor Colonel Hogan," Carter said, with sympathy.
"What are we gonna do for him, mes amis? I can't stand to see him so sad like this," LeBeau wondered, as he flipped a pancake in his pan.
"It's a good question...'cause I have no idea what we should do," Kinch answered, tapping his fingers against the table.
There was a brief moment of silence before the youngest team member brightened up with an idea.
"I got it!" Carter cried. "We'll play charades. That always makes me feel better."
"I don't think charades is going to lift Colonel Hogan's depression, mon ami," LeBeau said.
"The Gov'nor would never play a game of charades in the current mood he's in...now a date with a gorgeous blonde, that might cheer him up a bit," Newkirk suggested.
Carter pouted and sulked back down in his spot.
"Well...I sure thought it was a good idea." He grumbled, to himself.
"I'd suggest we help Colonel Hogan have his own baby, but that's way out of the question. There's no way we could get away with something like that; not with the Gestapo and the Germans on our tail all the time. On top of that, what we do around here is too dangerous for a baby," Kinch said.
"We could baby proof the barracks," Carter said.
"And do what; put bubble wrap around the tunnel entrance? What if the filthy bosche were to walk in and see that?" LeBeau remarked, immediately turning down the stupid idea.
"We could snatch a baby and bring it back to Colonel Hogan to have," Newkirk threw out there.
"Oh, and how well do you think that would go over with Hochstetter if he found out? Not even Klink would let us get by with that," the radioman pointed out.
"I didn't say it was a brilliant idea." The Englishman commented back.
"Maybe there's nothing we can do for him," Carter said. "Maybe all we can do is just sit here and let him get it out of his system."
Newkirk got to his feet and went to sit down next to his best friend. He put an arm around his shoulders.
"Don't be sad, Andrew. We'll find something to cheer up Colonel Hogan. And when we do, he'll be back to his old self faster than you can make Schultzie say 'yes' to a couple of chocolate bars," he said, encouraging.
"Yeah, but what is the question that remains," LeBeau said. The Frenchman placed all the plates in front of his friends, put one in his spot, and sat down with his cup of coffee to continue talking with them.
The four of them all sat in silence for the longest amount of time, not saying a word to anybody. It was not until Kinch snapped his fingers did the quiet finally die away.
"I got it!" He gasped.
"What is it, mate? And it better not be charades." Newkirk commented, semi annoyed.
"What if I were to get on the radio with General Berkman and told him the situation going on with Colonel Hogan? We could arrange a meeting in London with Gracie, her parents, and the Colonel. That way Colonel Hogan could see that Gracie was safe and being loved, yet still have some closure." The staff sergeant explained.
"Hey, that's not bad, mate," Newkirk cheered.
"Why didn't I think of that?!" LeBeau cried.
"Colonel Hogan could be given a radio message from London saying he is immediately wanted there for information on a fake top secret assignment. When he gets there, he'll get the wildest surprise and see that it's Gracie there to see him." The English corporal added.
"Do you think Colonel Hogan would fall for it?" The technical sergeant asked.
"I don't see why not; he's been sent on these kind of assignments before," LeBeau remarked.
"I'll get on the radio with London right now," Kinch said, rising to his feet. He walked over to the fake bunk bed, banged it twice, and climbed down the ladder when the tunnel entrance appeared. When he was out of sight, Newkirk, LeBeau, and Carter were the only ones left at the table.
"I sure hope this idea of Kinch's works," Carter said.
"Are you underestimatin' Kinch, mate?" Newkirk asked.
"No, not at all; it's just...what if it takes more than that to make Colonel Hogan feel better again?"
"Don't worry; Colonel Hogan's been through twice as more devastating situations before. He always comes around," the Frenchman answered, with confidence.
Carter sighed.
"I just feel so bad for him is all," he said.
"We all do, Carter," Newkirk said. "We all do."